Heart\'s Journal

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Chapter 4: Mirror To the Other Side

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OCT. 6, 2003

My dear Lissa,



Unfortunately, you were correct. I was summoned last night. It was difficult but nothing I have not endured before. I hope you feel better soon. My first class of the day is beginning. My favorite class, first year Gryffindors and Slytherins, oh joy!



Severus



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Lissa woke about midmorning in need of the bathroom...hot and fevered. She couldn\'t seem to draw a decent breath! By the time she got back to the couch she was shaking from the exertion. Goddess, she was sick! She snuggled into the couch wrapped in her blanket and closing her eyes to imagine Severus\'s arms about her comforting her and holding her close. The delightful thought of him being there to care for her when she was ill like this was soooo comforting! She started to drift away on the wings of sleep when a stray memory cause one eye to pop open suddenly. Her journal! He had written back to her. Hadn\'t he? *Oh please...whatever God or Goddess is listening to her....don\'t let those replies be a result of fever! I don\'t think I could handle that right now!* She groaned as she rose searched for her purse. Within it laid the book that had begun it strange tickling energy the first day Severus had replied. It still tingled! Yes! That was a good sign! Lissa gathered her journal and pen and dropped on the couch like a stone. *Oh yes....soooo graceful!* Somehow she just couldn\'t really find it in herself to care overly much at the moment.



Lissa opened the journal and when she found his entries again she breathed a sigh of relief. *He \'did\' write back! It wasn\'t the fever!* Her thoughts were childlike but didn\'t care about eit either. *Oh happy day!* She giggled inwardly...*I am so campy! I am so \'sick\'! Ugh!*



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Oct 6, 2003



Dear Prof. Snape,



I cannot draw a decent breath....it hurts too much to breath deeply. Going to the bathroom saps all my strength! What is wrong with me? I have a god-awful fever and coughing about makes me pass out.



I am so sorry he called. Is there *anything* at all that I can do for you? My heart goes out to you and I wish I could do something to help. I also wish yore hre here with me to hold me. I could use the comfort. I know you need your rest but I hope to hear from you later today. If not, I understand.



First years. Huh? You will definately be up for a shoulder and neck massage afterwards. hehe I\'d like to touch your cheek at least once. *sigh* Sorry. Did not mean to sound maudlin. Take care, sweet one.



Love,

Lissa



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Sweet one, ha! When had anyone ever called him sweet? But the offer of a massage. Now, that would do wonders for him.



Severus ran is fingers over her words and could almost feel that aches, the cramps, that rasping cough. He was worried. It sounded like she might be more sick that she was letting on. He was more concerned over Lissa going to the butchers that muggles called doctors. /> />


Severus wondered if there might be a way to as least send something through to her. Albus had an odd twinkle in his eye last night after he read through their journal. What was the scheming old man up to now?



By the end of classes that day Severus decided another conversation with Albus was in order but first he had a few questions for the medi-witch.



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Oct 6, 2003



My dear Lissa,



Please just rest. I am going now to talk to Madam Pomfrey and Albus to see if there is someway we can help. Your illness seems to be getting worse and I am concerned for you.



Severus



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Oct 6, 2003



Dear Severus,



Hope you don\'t mind the usage of your t nat name. I have no choice but to rest. I can\'t really breathe. So much for singing opera right now. hehe Want to say and ask so much but I don\'t want to push you. Gentle touches, love and softer feelings can hurt worse than any pain inflicted when you not had it in so long. I know of this and I have no desire to hurt you in any way. That gentle touch while so desired and needed can inadvertently open wounds one would have thought long since forgotten.



I sincerely doubt there is a way to help unless you can get here or bring me there. I am touched that you are concerned for me. I think my heart would skip a beat if it weren\'t oxygen starved. Humor....gotta have it!



Forgive me but I need to sleep. I will write more later. Ok? I miss you. Silly as it may sound....I do.



Love,



Lissa

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Lissa,



Nothing you wris sis silly. Albus is working on something he won’t tell me what it is yet. My worry over your illness is making me impatient. Poppy wasn’t much help she would need you here. I feel so very helpless and it is making me angry. I think I scared my fourth year Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs this afternoon. So something went well today.



Please rest as much as you can and make sure you drink plenty of liquids. Do that for me please…



Worriedly yours,

Severus



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Severus was once again on his way to Albus’s office to pester him once again for a solution. He didn’t want to loose her now that he may have found someone who could love him for all his nasty and bad tempered ways.

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Lissa read the entry and cursed her timing and luck. Why did all this drama have to happen when she had just found Severus? She looked a mess right now and she knew it! The term \'death warmed over\' would be kind in reference to her. He was worried for her? Did that mean she stood a chance with him? She was so afraid of finding out!



She adjusted herself weakly on the couch and glanced at herself in the living room mirror. Yup! She looked horrid! She also needed to reply to him.



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Oct 6, 2003



Dear Severus,

Please don\'t worry. I guess I should not have told you...I did not mean for you to worry needlessly. I will be fine. As soon as I can I will go to the doctor\'s office. I can\'t right now....I need my paycheck. hehe Poor as a church mouse as the saying goes. I have water and fruit juice beside me and I make tea when I feel a bit energetic.



I am glad your day is going well otherwise. I feel for your students but I know that you also do them great service acting as you do.



Later Sweet One,

Lissa



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Severus gave the gargoyle the password and almost flew up the revolving stairs. Not bothering to knock Severus walked straight in to Albus’s office.



“Albus we have to do something. She seems to be getting worse. Please tell me that you have found some kind of solution. I don’t beg for anything you know this but I am begging you now please tell me you have found something.” Severus’s voice was bordering on plaintive.



“Severus calm down and have a cup of tea and I will explain to you what I have found thus far.” Albus conjured a steaming pot of tea, his favorite Earl Grey. He poured Severus a cup sweetened it lightly added just a bit of lemon the way he knew Severus liked it.



Severus felt a tingle in the journal knowing she had replied he opent ant and began to read. In a moment he was out of his chair again. “Albus, she is going to one of the butchers that muggles call doctors. Please, you must have found something.”



\"My dear boy. You don\'t even really know her.\"



\"Albus, I don\'t have to know her to care for her and if she is ill. This isn\'t negotiable. I HAVE to help her.\"



Albus sighed heavily. \"I have been doing some research that will help us get her here but it isn\'t that far along yet. Perhaps this will help alleviate your concern.\" As Albus said this he picked up a hand held mirror and cast a powerful dweomer on it that would allow Severus to at least view her. “Try this Severus. It will allow you to at least observe her.\"



“Albus you don\'t know how much this means to me but I must ask.. Have you found a way to bring her to me?”



Albus paused watching Severus. *Should I tell him of the rest of my success? He surely has better sense than to try it yet!*



\"I have also found a spell that will allow us to breach the universal veil but that very same said veil is at this time too thick to penetrate with much luck. I have a theory that the veil may be at it\'s thinnest around All Hallow’s Eve. That would be the best time to try to retrieve her, I believe. I have been partially successful in reaching through a little but it was very draining. Now is not a good time to try to get through.\"





Severus looked at the mirror he held in his hand and only beheld his own reflection. \"How do I activate the mirror?\"



\"Speak the name of the one you wish to view.\"



The wheels in Severus’s mind were already spinning. Albus had reached through the veil.. Severus wondered if it was possible to push something through the veil... Severus also had a thought of genius that might persuade Albus even further..



\"Albus you said you had had limited success, if this works you may beadle to reach into the veil and find Sirus Black as well.. Potter has been not his usual annoying self lately and he is even beginning to worry me.



\"One thing at a time Severus. I would not advise trying to push something through. Come here a moment.\"



Severus stood and walked across the room to Albus\'s desk...



Severus ran a long finger across the face of the mirror and whispered Lissa\'s name. The silvered glass shimmered for a moment and revealed Lissa propped up on pillows on her couch in the living room looking very pale save for her flushed cheeks that spoke of a high fever. She turned to her side and began to cough, her face turning red from the exertion and then gasping for breath once the coughing fit had stopped. After a moment she drank a bit more juice and settled into the couch clutching the journal close to her breasts as she closed her eyes in an attempt to rest.



“Albus look, she is suffering. She can hardly breathe. You can\'t tell me not to help her with everything in my power.” Severus looked at the woman on the couch again. True, her hair was a tangled mess and her clothing looked a bit shabby, if comfortable. To him though she was beautiful. He could feel the hard lines in his face begin to soften as he looked at her. He felt an emotion swell in his chest that he hadn’t felt for so long, not since he thought he was in love with Lily.





\"We will help her Severus but we must also be cautious.\" Albus showed him to a side room where there was a shrouded mirror. He uncovered the mirror, took out a piece of paper and began to recite a spell from that paper. Once he had gotten to a certain point he stopped, the spell unfinished.



\"Come here and feel the veil Severus. Tell me your impressions.\"



Severus stepped up to the mirror and ran his fingers across its surface. The glass shimmered at his touch but held fast He applied a bit more pressure and channeled a bit of his energy to his hand. The surface dented a bit but would not give. Severus gasped though as he felt his energy being sucked away at the attempt.



\"You see what I mean now. Yes? I managed to push my hand through but it was very difficult and extremely draining.\"





Severus could not help but to channel a bit more of his strength and finally with sweat running down his face the veil gave a bit and his fingers pushed through the other side.



‘It can be done,’ he thought. Albus will be livid with him but the risk was worth it.



Albus pulled him back and livid was a mild word at the moment. \"Stop it Severus! I told you it was too draining! I forbid you to continue! We will do what we can for Lissa but we must proceed cautiously!\"



\"You are right of course Albus.” Severus said stepping back from the mirror. “If you will excuse me I have essays to grade and Potions to analyze.\"



Albus relented and sighed. \"We will help her. It will simply take a bit of time.\"



\"Yes Albus. I do understand. I am sorry for my outburst earlier. Thank you for all you have done. I know that a solution will be found eventually.\" Severus turned to leave.



\"She takes comfort in your writing her. Perhaps you should take a little time to do so.\" Albus knew Severus was upset but hoped he would calm down and not do anything foolish.



“I will Albus, I will. Nothing short of my death would keep me from writing to her.”