Scarred Souls

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Title: Scarred Souls



Author: Misty Moonlight/Co-author: QueenBoadicea



Beta: QueenBoadicea



Pairings: Severus/Harry



Published: 12/10/2008



Summary: A widowed Harry must bond with Snape in order to save his daughter’s life. Sev gains a family, for better or worse, and the hearts of two scarred souls will be changed forever.



Warnings: Romance, Drama, Angst, Alternate Universe, Sexual Situations, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Slash, Anal, Language, Humor, possible MPreg, Bonding, Original Characters, Family, OOC-ness,

non-canon, WIP



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Chapter 37: Kisses and Hisses





“He’s getting worse, Ron.”



“Is he, mate? Didn’t think that was possible with Snape.”



Harry nodded moodily over his fire whiskey. It wasn’t as good as what he had at home but he wasn’t looking for quality, not now. This was just a good way to get away from the children and out of the house. It wasn’t always practical for Harry to meet with his mates on a Monday night after work. But Rosmerta’s was dead quiet then and, after a weekend cooped up with an increasingly sour Snape, Harry found himself glad for the relative peace.



“I don’t know if it’s the pregnancy or what. But he’s either hostile or sulking. He doesn’t talk for hours on end except to bark orders. If I try to talk to him, he practically bites my head off.”



“Hermione gets that way sometimes. It’s female hormones or something. Pregnancy makes women grumpy. Guess it does that to blokes, too.”



“It’s not that. Ginny had three kids, yeah? So I know all about temper.”



Ron chuckled. “You don’t have to tell me, Harry. I grew up with her, remember?” He lifted his finger and signaled for another pint.



“I’m telling you, this is different. It’s like the first days we were bonded. Severus is acting as if he hates me again.”



“That’s too bad. But it’s not like it’s anything different from the past, yeah?” The redhead smiled ruefully, his gaze suddenly faraway. “Sometimes I got the feeling Hermione hated me. Before Timothy was born, when her back was aching or she couldn’t sleep at night, she’d grumble and swear she was never letting me touch her again. Used to drive me mental. But here we are, expecting our second child.”



Harry grinned. “Cheers.”



“Likewise.” He clinked his glass with Harry’s, downed his drink in one gulp and licked his lips. “Gotta say, mate, I was fair gobsmacked when Hermione gave me the news about Snape. Imagine: the greasy git pregnant.”



“He’s not so greasy these days, Ron,” Harry pointed out. “Whatever that gunk he used to put in his hair isn’t so much in evidence. Guess he found a way to keep his hair clean—especially now that Kreacher’s not messing with his shampoo.”



Ron sniggered. “Wonder what other jokes he was playing on the man?”



“I asked the twins but they said they didn’t know. They just told Kreacher to ‘mess about’ with him and Kreacher just used his imagination.”



“There’s another shock. Didn’t think that shriveled dwarf had any.”



Harry leaned back with a sigh. “I’d give anything to go back to the cottage. Black’s manor is as gloomy as ever. It hasn’t got ghosts but it feels like it’s haunted. If it weren’t for the kids, I’d have been driven up the walls by now.” Harry brightened. “Speaking of which, did Hermione tell you about Lily walking?”



“She did. She also told me about her walking up to Snape. Now that I would have given Galleons to see.” Ron tapped his wand on the table and cast Tempus. “Oops. I promised to meet Hermione soon. She wants to go scouting for baby things, ‘gender-neutral’ she calls them, whatever that means.”



Harry wanted to cry out to him to stay. It wasn’t that he was afraid of returning to the manor. It just was so depressing these days to have to deal with Severus’s temper, which only seemed to worsen after the ultimatum from Poppy. Harry wasn’t sure but he feared that Severus was secretly experimenting on his own and that accounted for the severity of his mood swings.



He said none of this to Ron. The man couldn’t help and he had his own life and wife to handle. Harry feared he was on his own, unless he was willing to brave his bond mate’s rage and carry out Poppy’s threat.



“Hello. Harry?”



Ron and Harry looked up, both of them furtively reaching their wands. Merlin on a stick, it was Colin Creevey again. He was wearing a sky blue shirt and nondescript tan pants instead of the usual wizarding robes. It looked weird on him, like he was playing a part rather than merely opting for more comfortable clothing.



“Colin, good to see you again,” Harry said cautiously. Ron raised his eyebrows, surprised.



“You too, Harry. Mind if I join you?”



“We were just leaving, actually,” Harry said before Ron could speak.



Colin’s smile faltered a little. But he pushed on. “Oh, in that case, I’ll just leave with you, if you don’t mind.”



Ron interjected, “Colin, been awhile. Whacha been up to, mate?” Harry wanted to warn Ron. The former Gryffindor student seemed genial enough and he appeared to have forgotten their previous encounter. But something was off about Colin and it set every nerve in his body prickling.



Colin shrugged. “Nothing much. When I left Hogwarts, I got a job working in the Ministry with my dad. It didn’t quite suit me. So now I’m drifting until I can find something better.”



“Really? My dad and me are in the Ministry. What does your dad do?” Ron probed.



“He’s in the Improper Use of Magic Office. He’s got a whole file filled with photographs about enchanted Muggles. Good stuff but it wasn’t for me.”



Ron nodded politely. Clearly, he was bored with the conversation and so was Harry. Colin trailed after them when they left and they both said goodbye to Ron when he Disapparated.



Colin didn’t seem inclined to leave. He leaned closer to Harry and said, “Sorry about your marriage, Harry.”



Harry shifted back slightly. Colin was wearing some kind of cologne and it was a little overpowering when he was this close. “I’m not,” he replied stiffly. “Severus and I are getting along real well these days.”



Blue-gray eyes narrowed. “Really? I thought otherwise.”



Harry didn’t want to talk about this with Colin. “Well, it was nice chatting with you again, Colin.”



Colin’s hand flew out and grabbed Harry’s arm. “Wait, Harry! I was just thinking—if you weren’t in any particular rush to get home, would you mind grabbing a pint with me? I’ll pay, if you’d like.” He stepped even closer to Harry, his eyelids drooping over the blue irises. “Maybe I can show you what you’re missing at home.”



Harry froze. He didn’t believe it. Was he being—chatted up? By a man who thought his tastes had changed because he was married to Snape?



He hadn’t even known Colin was gay! All those hours and days Colin had spent trailing Harry with his camera came rushing back to him. He had thought it silly hero worship at the time. Had it actually been something else?



His silence must have emboldened Colin. He grabbed Harry and flung his arms around his neck. He kissed him soundly on the lips and it was enough to break Harry out of his shock. He brought a knee up into Colin’s crotch—hard. The man immediately doubled up, gasping for breath, as Harry stumbled back a few yards.



“You stupid shit!” he snarled, pointing his wand at the other man. “You obviously didn’t read that article as carefully as others did, you illiterate. Otherwise you’d know I was tricked into that marriage. Just because I’m with Snape doesn’t mean I’m into shagging blokes!”



Colin managed to gasp, “I know all about that article, Harry. I helped write it.”



“You—what?”



He straightened up although he kept his distance as Harry continued to brandish his wand. “After Hogwarts, I decided to follow my natural bent and started working for the Daily Prophet.”



“That filthy rag? Colin, how could you lend your name to those bastards? They’ve written nothing but crap about me since my fourth year!” Harry spat.



“I told you. My dad works in the Ministry. He overheard that minister complaining about how badly Severus treated him when you two were bonded. He relayed the information to me. So I did a little digging. Did you know that successful Unbreakable Vows become automatically registered at the Ministry?”



He grinned at Harry’s stunned expression. “That’s right. I realized that was the real reason behind your marriage. Deciding that this would be a really great story, I started following you around when you were in public.”



Visibly preening, he continued, “I was listening in Slugs & Jiggers that day you came in to buy potions ingredients. I interviewed people who knew you at Hogwarts. You thought I was just a shutterbug. But I actually find it pretty easy to get people to talk to me. Even Slytherins. Although most of them just liked to take cheap shots at you.” Colin frowned and that ugly look flickered through his eyes again.



“Colin, you berk. Do you have any idea of the trouble you caused? You nearly got Severus killed!” Harry hissed.



Colin shrugged. “And that would be a bad thing why?”



“Evidently, your dad didn’t look into my situation too carefully. If Severus dies by violent means, then I die, too.”



Instead of looking horrified, Colin smirked. “That’s only if you kill him, Harry.”



“What?”



“You say that an awful lot, Harry. You can’t be too bright. Honestly, who told you that? Snape?”



“Hermione. And she was a hell of a lot smarter than you, Colin. Or your dad, I’ll bet.”



“I don’t care what she read, Harry. Magical laws regarding the Unbreakable Vow have been considerably loosened in recent years. If you kill Snape, you’ll die. But not if someone else does.”



The unpleasant smile on Colin’s face stated that he wouldn’t mind being one of those who did Snape an ill turn in an alley someday.



Harry clenched his wand. He had to make this idiot understand. “Colin, listen to me very carefully. I don’t want you or anyone going after Severus. He proved to be a good, brave man during the war. We all owe him our lives. Even you!”



“None of which changes the fact that when he finally came out of hiding, he used an evil trick to get you to marry him! He’s a right arse and he always has been! Where’s his fucking gratitude, Harry? You want to tell me that?”



“Again, that’s none of your business. This is a personal matter between him and me. It doesn’t concern you or the rest of the Wizarding World.”



“Oh, but it does, Harry. When you married Ginny Weasley, I was devastated. But then you had to get shackled to Severus Snape,” he spat. “That was too much. Something had to be done.”



There was a mad light in Colin’s eyes now. This was beyond hero worship, whatever it was. “Colin, find somebody else to molest. And pick your next target a little more carefully, unless you want to find yourself on the business end of a nasty hex.” Before the man could speak again, Harry Disapparated.



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He was so shaken by the encounter, he didn’t notice nor care about the silence in his home. For once he was in no mood for conversation with his children or Severus. He was just going to take a shower—a long, hot one—fix himself something to eat and then go to bed.



A loud pounding on his bedroom door made him jump. It must be Severus. No one else banged in that demanding fashion. He let it go on for a few seconds and then waved his hand, causing the door to fly open.



Severus did not fall into the room—too bad, that would have been amusing to watch. Instead, he glared and strode in without so much as an invitation.



“Oh do come right in, Severus. Couldn’t wait to get back in here, could you?” Normally, he didn’t taunt Severus. But Harry was in a foul mood and had had enough of his bond mate’s high-handed ways. If Severus wanted a fight, he was about to get one.



The man halted and then flushed, his eyes flicking to and from the bed. Interesting; he looked almost embarrassed at that reminder. The next instance, his features assumed their typical stony expression.



“Where have you been? You didn’t come home from work.”



“That’s right. Had to get away,” he muttered. “Were the children all right?”



“How should I know? I’m not the caretaker for your brats.”



Brats. Not again. “What do you want? I was just about to take a bath so I’d appreciate a little privacy.”



“This won’t take long. You should have let me know you would be taking a detour. I could have asked you to stop on the way home for more potions ingredients.”



“It’s not for you, is it? You’re not supposed to be taking more experimental concoctions! Poppy said so!” Harry snapped, staring angrily at the dark-eyed man currently smirking at him.



“And how would you know to what uses I might put any herbs or other ingredients? You’re still as inept at potions as you were when you took my class, aren’t you, Potter?”



Harry didn’t bother to confirm or deny the statement. “If you’ve just come in here to complain about my being tardy, you can save it. And since you’re not crippled, you can make a glamour or take Polyjuice and get your own damn ingredients.”



Severus glared and stalked over to him, invading his space. He was about to say something else, probably a malicious retort, when his face assumed a very odd expression. His nose twitched and he leaned closer to Harry, his eyes narrowing.



Harry stepped back, unnerved by this performance. “Oi, back off. What do you think you’re doing?”



The Slytherin moved closer, fury blazing in the black eyes. “So this is what you’ve been up to, Potter,” he snarled. “I might have known.”



“What? What’s gotten into you now?” Harry cried, exasperated by this latest display of hostility.



“Have you forgotten you can give yourself to no one but me? Are you trying to lose your powers? How can you be so selfish, you stupid little sneak?” he hissed.



“What the hell are you banging on about, Snape?” He hoped using the man’s surname might shock him into some sense of civility. Harry had been calling him Severus for weeks now, a courtesy he imagined the man appreciated.



Severus either didn’t notice the formality or was determined not to let it stop his tirade. “You come home late, reeking of another man’s cologne, without a hint of shame or explanation and expect me to accept it calmly?” Severus yelled, his sallow cheeks becoming blotched with rage.



“Another man’s—is that what you think I’ve been doing? Sleeping with somebody else?” It was too much. The tension from the past few weeks, the strain of the current argument, the quivering residual resentment from Colin’s attack caused something to break inside Harry. He leaned forward and spoke as harshly as he could, feeling himself practically shaking with anger.



“Are you insane? You think that, what, one drug-filled romp in the sheets with you and I’m going to throw myself at other men? I couldn’t bring myself to touch you until you fucking drugged me! Did you conveniently forget that?”



Harry’s voice had lowered until he was nearly hissing with fury. He was practically toe to toe with the taller man now but he wasn’t about to back down. He wasn’t in the wrong here and he was getting tired of being treated like he was still a bumbling Hogwarts student.



Abruptly, the anger faded from Severus’s face to be replaced by a crazed expression. Without a word of warning, he grabbed Harry’s head and kissed him.



This kiss was nothing’s like Colin’s. That had been clumsy and sloppy, with the eagerness of a stupid child who’d seized an opportunity but didn’t know what he was doing. This—this was the fiery passion of a man pushed beyond his limits.



Severus clung to him, kissed him like Harry held all the life-giving air in the room, plundered his mouth with tongue as one licking sweets. He groaned, mumbling something incoherent in which Harry could make out only the words “god” “Harry” and “snake”.



In an instant, all his objections to gay sex flew right out the window. Shit, this felt incredible. The firmness of Severus’s wiry form was one long band of heat running the length of Harry’s body. He leaned towards that heat, a plant arching towards the life-giving sun.



Oh, that’s…what’s he doing with his…feels so good. No, wait…no, don’t want to wait. It’s because I haven’t had any in a long… Fuck, who would have thought Severus kissed like this?!?



His senses reeling, Harry didn’t have enough self-possession to reject his bond mate, to deny the hard thigh rubbing between his legs, the insistent bulge he could feel against his stomach. He gasped and arched when the man’s hand swept under his shirt and grasped a nipple. A whimper burst from him as it was expertly rubbed and tweaked. He was sitting on the edge of the mattress, Severus’s lips running from his mouth to his ear and down his neck, before he realized what was happening.



Over Severus’s head, he could see the picture of his dead wife, staring at him, open mouthed with shock. Oh god.



Harry shoved Severus away. What had Severus been thinking? What had he been thinking?



Severus backed off, looking lost and bewildered. The cheeks were flaming with color and the hot breath of him swept over Harry’s face like a desert wind.



“I’m—I’m sorry, Harry. I don’t know what came over me,” he muttered as he staggered to his feet.



“It’s…” What could he say? That it was okay? That it meant nothing? He knew better and so did Severus. However, Harry instinctively knew that any acknowledgement would make the embarrassment infinitely worse for both of them.



Severus regained his composure faster than Harry did. He smoothed down his hair and swung around. He was through the door, banging it behind him, before Harry could think of a thing to say.



What had just happened? Okay, it hadn’t happened. But it might have. It could have. It could still, if this tingling in his trousers meant anything. What the fuck was wrong with him?



Harry shivered. He glanced at the portrait. “I’m so sorry, Ginny,” he whispered. She said nothing, only stared at him with a tender, sad expression.



Sighing at the latest mess life seemed fit to throw at him, Harry threw off his clothes, left them in a heap on the floor and proceeded naked to his bath. He wasn’t usually so careless but right now he didn’t give a damn. Kreacher would be delighted at cleaning up the extra mess, anyway.





TBC