Taming

Scorpius sat at the top of the steps that led up to Ravenclaw Tower and sobbed. He didn’t even care about anyone seeing him.

Then Albus was suddenly next to him. He sat down and put his arm around Scorpius’s shoulders. “I’m so sorry. She’s going to be okay.”

Scorpius nodded. But he had no idea if he was crying for Rose, for Albus, or for himself at this point. When he got himself under control, he asked Albus, “Where did you go that day? After you talked to that girl? Rose and I scoured the castle looking for you.”

He ducked his head. “I was in your old dormitory, actually. With Kane.” Scorpius stiffened, but Albus continued, “I ran into him in the hall and I was upset. He asked what was wrong and he seemed actually concerned. I told him what I’d just heard and he… made it worse.”

Scorpius clenched his fists. “How?”

“Well, I said that I was worried because I knew you’d been with several girls. He laughed at my use of the word several and said, ‘try hundreds.’ I said that I didn’t think that was even humanly possible, and he started telling me a bit more about what Slytherin parties are like. And that it was certainly possible. So… was it?”

“Was it what?” Scorpius asked tersely.

“Possible that there were… hundreds?”

“You honestly want to discuss numbers?”

“Yes.”

Scorpius sighed. “I don’t know for sure, okay? But I would estimate about a hundred. And about half that many blokes. There, happy?”

“A hundred girls? A hundred and fifty people total?” Albus’s voice sounded far away.

“Give or take. That’s my best estimate,” Scorpius said snottily. He wasn’t going to defend himself any longer.

“Wow… You were such a slag!” Albus giggled. That reaction was so unexpected that Scorpius laughed a little himself. He hit Albus on the arm.

“Shut it!”

Albus just giggled harder. “I mean, obviously you’re gorgeous, but that’s just… excessive, don’t you think?”

“Not much else to do around here,” Scorpius admitted wryly.

Albus finally stifled his laughter. “I’m sorry, really. It’s just… I wasn’t expecting to hear that. You might as well of said a thousand. To me, it would be equally unbelievable.”

“Well, I know it wasn’t a thousand.”

“Are you quite sure?”

“Git.”

“Sorry,” Albus said, sobering.

Scorpius just shrugged.

“Well, anyway, there’s more. He told me that some guys he’d talked to said… Well, they said that you didn’t let anyone… fuck you. You know? That you always had to be the top, I guess.”

“And?”

“And… I don’t know. He made it sound like if you were really into guys that much, that you’d want to. And we never did…”

“So I couldn’t possibly be gay, right? That’s a load of shite, and you know it!”

“How do I know? I mean, obviously you liked fucking me, but you liked fucking girls, too.”

“How you explain all the times I sucked you off, then? I supposed I was imagining a girl then, too?”

“I guess not. I just… I shouldn’t have listened to him. But…”

“I need to ask you something.”

“What?”

“Did you and Kane… Do anything? I mean…”

“Do you really want to know that?” Albus asked heavily.

Fuck. Scorpius knew what that answer meant. It seemed that just when he’d seemingly got rid of Mirabella, he was going to have to kill Kane Morton now.

“Yes. I really want to know. Did you let him fuck you? Did you?” He was aware that his voice was rising semi-hysterically, and he was in danger of crying again.

“No.”

“Honestly?”

“I didn’t let him fuck me… I ah… I fucked him. Once.”

Scorpius felt bile rising in the back of his throat. “Oh, gods,” he whispered. “Did you like it? Was it worth it?” The hysteria was definitely evident in his voice now.

“No! It wasn’t worth anything! It didn’t mean anything! I just wanted to be… Be like you. For once.”

“You’re such a fool, Albus! If you wanted to do that, you could have asked me! You could have told me! I had no idea that you wanted to! You seemed so happy with everything and it didn’t even occur to me to think anything else!”

“I was happy! I just… wanted to see what it was like.”

“And you thought that you couldn’t find out with me? I loved you more than anything! I put you above everyone else from my past. You think that I would have denied you anything?”

Albus was crying now. “No. I know you wouldn’t have denied me… I just… I wanted to feel how it felt to be you.”

“So why don’t you go fuck a few girls, too, while you’re at it? Why don’t you get completely rat-arsed and stumble into bed with a few of Hogwarts’s finer trollops, whom you won’t even remember in the morning? Why don’t you spend a few years being totally miserable and empty inside? Next you can fall in love with someone who’ll rip your heart out because of what you did before you even knew he existed! Because it’s such fucking fun to be me!

But it’s all worth it because you get to be the top! Everyone wants your cock inside them, but no one wants you! No one even likes you because you’re such a shallow piece of shite, but it’s all worth it when you slide your cock into an available hole!”

“Scorpius… I…”

“I hated that person! I hated being that person! The only time I liked myself was when I was with you! Loving you was the only thing that I was ever good for and you took that away from me! You took it away from me so that you could bugger Kane Morton and feel like ‘the man’ for once. I don’t know if I can ever forgive you for that.”

Albus was sobbing hard now, rocking back and forth on the step, hugging his knees. Scorpius wished with all his heart that he could run to Rose right now. He remembered how easily Albus forgave him after their first encounter, and he wished this could be that easy. But they’d barely known each other then.

They’d known each other intimately, but they’d been near-strangers. Albus had done this to him after they’d fallen in love for real. After they’d shared everything. After they’d agreed to be married and be together forever. Every day for the rest of their lives.

“I’m sorry, Albus. I think I just need some time,” Scorpius said sadly, getting up off the step. He began to walk down the stairs. Albus’s sobbing followed him, tearing at him. He thought of Rose. Thought of her lying there in that bed, so deathly pale and still. He thought about kissing her. He thought about kissing Albus.

He thought about how everything had gone completely pear-shaped in the last week, and how tired he was of nothing being right.
Albus. Stupid, misguided, selfish boy! He sighed, stepping off the bottom step. Luckily, Scorpius knew a little something about being a stupid, misguided, selfish boy. And he knew he couldn’t go backwards. He had to go forward.

He sighed again. He heard Rose’s words from the previous night as clearly as if she were speaking in his ear, ‘If you ever fall in love with me, tell me about it. We can pick up where we left off. But somehow I don’t see that happening. I think there’s only one person for you.’

“I think you’re right, as usual, my Rose,” Scorpius whispered. He turned and looked up at Albus.

“Okay,” he said, loudly enough for Albus to hear over his sobs.

Albus looked up. “Okay, what?”

“I’ve had enough time.”

“For what?”

“To forgive you, you berk.”

And then Albus was running down the stairs and into his arms and they were kissing.

“You mean it?” Albus asked brokenly.

“Yes, you git. But only because I love you.”