Light on the Dark Side of Me

Title: Light on the Dark Side of Me
Author: Cocoa-Snape
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Harry Potter belongs exclusively to JKR…she is a goddess. I am making no money from this.
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Light on the Dark Side of Me
Chapter 34: I love you, Harry


For the second time that evening, Severus Snape found himself seated at his desk, his attentions focused on its left uppermost drawer. This time, he had even gone so far as opening it and removing the item in question, before coming to his senses and promptly replacing the box in its hiding place. He glanced over at the couch, noticing that Harry had almost finished his birthday cake and was now staring at him with a puzzled expression.

“Severus, do I have to ask you again what you’re doing over there?”

“No. It’s nothing,” Snape replied hurriedly, standing and making his way back to the couch.

As he sat down next to Harry, who was enthusiastically polishing off the rest of the cake, he remarked in an amused tone, “Are you always this hungry for dessert?”

Realizing his faux pas just before he spooned the last bite into his mouth, Harry asked sheepishly, “Sorry. Did you want anymore?”

“Not at all. I was simply inquiring about your eating habits. Please finish. I’ve had plenty.”

“You barely had any.”

“I already told you, I had my fill of sweets this past week. I can barely look at that frosted concoction without feeling unwell.”

“But you had a piece?”

“I appreciated the gesture, and…I was being polite,” Snape replied.

“Polite?” Harry asked with mock incredulity. “What did Dumbledore do to you this week?” he added with a chuckle.

“Never fear, I’m still the same old greasy git you love to hate.”

“I’m not so sure about the hate part anymore,” Harry said, as he reached up and ran his fingers through Snape’s hair. “And not greasy either.”

Snape closed his eyes as this simple contact. He wasn’t sure why it affected him so, except that it had been the first way Harry had ever touched him.

“I love your hair,” Harry continued. “It’s so soft – and I used to think it was all greasy.”

“It is,” Snape corrected. “…most of the time. It doesn’t take long when exposed to potion vapors.”

“It feels pretty damned good now,” Harry commented with a broad smile.

“I washed it especially for you,” Snape replied, barely holding back a smirk.

It took Harry a moment to register the sarcasm and answer, “Liar. You didn’t even know I was coming.”

“You’re right,” Snape said, his voice suddenly serious. “I didn’t.”

Harry could hear the solemnity of Severus’s reply, and he felt the need to re-explain himself. “I wanted to come sooner, but Dumbledore suggested giving you the week.” Harry paused a moment, before adding, “And also, I wanted you to know that I was sure. And that it wasn’t just because we’d been alone together for so long.”

“That was a very wise decision on your part,” Snape remarked.

“Guess something must have rubbed off,” Harry said with a smile.

Harry couldn’t help holding his breath slightly as he saw Severus leaning towards him. And he wondered briefly if the butterflies he felt in his stomach when Severus kissed him would go away in time. He hoped not. But to Harry’s surprise, Severus avoided his lips, instead placing a delicate kiss on his cheek and the very corner of his mouth, swiping his tongue there.

“You had some frosting,” Snape explained.

Harry couldn’t resist. “I thought you said you didn’t want anything sweet.”

Snape smiled darkly and replied, “I suppose it’s all in the presentation.”

Harry snuggled himself against Severus’s warm body and reached over, taking the man’s hand in his own. Surprised by the feeling of something cold, Harry sat back up and spotted the antique gold filigree ring holding a brilliant ruby on Severus’s finger. Harry recognized it immediately, having seen it in Severus’s bedroom some days ago. Knowing that he hadn’t been wearing the ring moments before, Harry realized that Severus must have put it on when he had just been at his desk.

“You’re wearing that ring I saw on your night stand last week,” Harry remarked.

“It’s my family ring,” Snape said simply.

Noticing Harry’s intense stare, Snape slid it off his finger and handed it to Harry to examine.

Harry took it and asked, “Your father’s?”

Snape bristled at the question and Harry shot his head up, wondering what he had said wrong.

Snape scowled and said sharply, “Hardly. My father never gave a damn about tradition. But had it been his, I would never have kept it.” Severus added mentally, I would have burned it, with the rest of that bastard’s things.

A tense silence stretched between them. Carefully studying Severus, who had trained his eyes intently on the raging hearth, Harry knew immediately that there was so much Severus wasn’t saying. He only knew he had made things incredibly awkward in the span of a few seconds. Damn it, Harry. You always have to mess everything up.

“I’m sorry,” Harry began, “I didn’t—”

Snape put his hand up, silencing Harry’s apology. “I know,” he said. Harry was relieved as he saw Severus’s face relax.

Snape eyed his ring, still in Harry’s hands, and explained, “It belonged to my mother’s father. She had no brothers and so it passed to her. She gave it to me when I was 14, just before she died.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It was a long time ago,” Snape replied flatly.

But as Harry watched Severus’s eyes close just for a second, he knew that however long ago it might have been, the pain of it didn’t seem any less real to him. And Harry realized that he was just beginning to get to know this man. And damn, he wanted to know every single thing about him. Everything.

Harry glanced at the inside of the ring and noticed the engraved crest with the letter ‘P’ in the center. He handed it back, wondering what it signified. He did not even need to ask.

“Prince,” Snape explained. “My mother’s maiden name.”

Snape replaced the ring on his finger and the two sat in uncomfortable silence for many minutes. The quiet between them was discomfiting enough, but Snape’s nervous gestures were perhaps the most unnerving to Harry. It was very unlike this man to exhibit such outward signs of anxiety as he twiddled the ring with his other hand. He was, after all, a master at disguising his emotions. But apparently not now. Harry wondered what was going on.

Snape took a deep breath and opened his mouth as if he were about to speak, but then stopped and closed it again. Harry couldn’t help but feel that this was all his fault, having broached the sensitive topic of Severus’s father. But Harry had no way of knowing that the internal battle raging through Snape’s mind had nothing at all to do with his earlier indiscretion.

A moment later, Snape steeled himself mentally and began again, speaking through almost gritted teeth, “I had a small fragment of the underside of the stone removed and placed in a piece I commissioned.”

Despite not understanding what Severus was saying, relief washed over Harry nonetheless. Given Severus’s demeanor, he had been expecting the man’s next words to be, ‘Get out!’ He asked in confusion, “A piece? A piece of what?”

Snape lowered his head, eyeing the ring once more. He sat there motionless, even as he willed himself to move. Get up, Severus. Get up and get it. Just give it to him. ‘Damn this is hard.’

“What’s so hard?” Harry asked gently and Snape realized that he had inadvertently verbalized his last thought.

Snape got up slowly, walked over to his desk and opened the left uppermost drawer, staring for a moment at the item that had been occupying his thoughts for the last few hours – well, actually, days. Gingerly, he retrieved a small box, wrapped beautifully in deep green and brilliant gold. Moving to sit beside Harry once more, he offered it to the shocked young man.

“It’s for you, Harry.”

“When did you…?” Harry asked through his surprise.

“I commissioned it just before you left over the Holidays. I thought…I don’t know what I thought…” Snape said, shaking his head slightly, “…but at the time I didn’t think you’d want it.”

Harry opened the box and his mouth dropped open in utter awe at its contents – a platinum chain and an exquisitely crafted platinum amulet in the shape of a snake curled into the letter ‘S.’ A small fragment of the ruby from Severus’s ring studded the snake’s eye. Harry had never seen anything this beautiful before. And he could barely fathom the fact that Severus was giving this to him.

“It’s charmed,” Snape said, interrupting Harry’s mute haze. “The eye, as I said, is a piece of this stone – from my family ring. In addition to having protective charms, the presence of the stone in the amulet will connect us as long as I wear this ring. It will let me know if you are in danger.”

“Does…does it work the other way around?” Harry asked, regaining his powers of speech.

“It can. I can show you later if you like,” Snape replied, his brow crinkling slightly at Harry’s silence. “Do you like it?” Snape asked hesitantly

Harry’s head shot up and he said, “For a Legilimens, you’re pretty bad at reading my feelings right now.” And then Harry added forcefully, “I love it and I love you,” before throwing his arms around Severus and squeezing him so hard he could hear him struggle for breath.

Harry refocused his attentions on the amulet and started to pick it up with his hand before flinching sharply and dropping it onto his lap in shock. He stared at his fingers, which he was sure had been burned, but they were undamaged. The amulet had felt fiery hot.

“It won’t always feel like that on your skin – you’ll quickly grow accustomed to it,” Snape explained.

“What is it?” Harry asked.

“It’s the protective charms.”

Astonished, Harry realized that the object was hot with magic. “I’ve never felt anything this powerful on an object before,” Harry remarked incredulously.

Snape smiled. “Well…I had Albus cast the charms. It was quite the ordeal believe me,” Snape said, rolling his eyes in mock annoyance. “He was absolutely beside himself with glee. I have surely filled my twinkle quota for the next ten years! But I decided you were worth it.”

Harry smiled broadly and replied, “You must love me.” He had said it as a joke, but as soon as the words had come out of his mouth, he regretted them. However much he wanted this gift to signify love, Harry hadn’t intended to press Severus into anything and he needed him to understand that.

“I…I didn’t mean to…” Harry began awkwardly, his head lowered in embarrassment.

“Harry…” Snape interrupted gently.

Snape’s voice lowered a bit and he spoke with a strange calm, “Look at me, Harry.” Harry raised his eyes to meet Severus’s and the man continued, his dark depths burning understanding into Harry’s own. “Love, Harry, sounds wholly inadequate to describe my feelings for you. I hope you understand that I do not give this to you lightly.”

Snape stared at Harry for a long moment, letting the force of his words sink in. As he studied the young man seated in front of him, so full of trust and love for him – even when Severus did not have it for himself – he could not understand why he had ever been so nervous or hesitant to give Harry the amulet in the first place.

Snape continued, “By giving this to you, this binds us together. Not officially, of course. But to me, you are now part of my family. Do you understand?”

Harry nodded, his eyes brimming with tears.

Snape lifted the amulet and chain off Harry’s lap and fastened it around his neck. Harry was surprised to find that it burned for only a few seconds, before becoming comfortably warm on his chest.

Realizing all too well that sometimes bluntness was required, and perhaps knowing that it was long past the time to admit his feelings out loud (to an awake Harry), Snape took a deep breath. Gently cupping Harry’s cheeks with his hands, Snape whispered to him, just inches away from his face, “I would not give this to you, Harry, if I did not love you with all my heart and soul. I love you, Harry Potter.”

Harry’s tears were now flowing freely down his cheeks, and he leapt into Severus’s arms, exclaiming, “Oh God, Severus, I love you so much.”

Harry leaned in and pressed his lips to Severus’s. The two kissed for some time – soft, deliberate kisses that told the story of their affection, their love. Harry found himself on Severus’s lap, his legs straddling his lover’s hips.

After breaking their last kiss, Harry met Severus’s eyes and stared intently at him, before whispering, “I want you to make love to me, Severus.”

Snape’s lips quirked around the edges and he remarked with amusement, “I think we just did that.”

“Yes, I know. And it was amazing…but I want more. I want everything,” Harry said meaningfully.

Oh Merlin. Snape felt himself growing incredibly hot from that statement – from the mere thought of what Harry was offering him. But he knew that given all that they had been through, now was not the time to make any assumptions. He kissed Harry gently once again and breathed very close to him, “I need you to tell me what you mean, Harry.”

Harry took a deep breath and replied with false calm, “I want you inside me, Severus.”

Snape’s breath caught in his throat and he felt Harry’s words go straight to his cock.

But his anxiety kept him lucid as he replied, “I want that very much as well, Harry. But we don’t have to do that yet you know. Perhaps we should wait. We can always do other things.”

Harry stroked Severus’s cheek with his hand and said softly, “I want to be yours…in every way.”

Taking in the confident, beautiful young man in front of him, Snape spoke directly from his heart – needing Harry to understand the profound depth of his feelings for him.

“How, my love, can you still have any doubt that you are?”

It was as though a thunderclap had struck him – paralyzing Harry with the staggering force of those words. He felt completely undone by the unequivocal statement behind Severus’s question. And as those obsidian eyes watched him – seeming, as always, to pierce his soul – Harry knew. He knew that he belonged to Severus. And that he loved this man with every fiber of his being.

“Please, take me, Severus. I’ve been waiting for this moment for so long.”

Snape could barely contain the pulsating need that was driving him now. Hearing Harry’s assent, his words of longing for their joining, it was too much.

“I think then, it’s time I took you to my bed,” Snape purred against Harry’s ear, and in the next moment, he stood, hoisting Harry up with him, Harry instinctively wrapping his legs around Severus’s waist.

It was Severus’s sudden aggressiveness that brought Harry back to reality and to the realization of what was about to happen. A glance into Severus’s eyes, now burning dark with lust, only furthered his nerves. He was not familiar with much more than the simple mechanics of love-making between two men (with the exception of the horrible things he had seen in Severus’s memory), but one thing he knew was that this was going to hurt, especially being his first time. Eyeing Severus once again, who had opened his bedroom door with a whispered word, Harry’s apprehension only intensified at the almost feral stare that was being leveled at him.

Before he knew it, the words came tumbling out of his mouth, “I’ve never…” Harry stopped before finishing the rest of the statement. I’m such an idiot! Harry thought, wincing mentally at his stupidity. Of course he knows I’ve never done this before. Don’t laugh at me, please.

“I know, Harry,” came the very gentle whisper from Severus as he set Harry down on the edge of the bed.

Harry looked up.

“Are you nervous?” Snape asked.

“No.”

Seeing right through Harry’s mediocre attempt at deception, an amused smirk lit Snape’s face and he replied fondly, “My little Occlumens.”

“Now is not the appropriate time to be making fun of me,” Harry replied in a huff, but with a smirk of his own.

“Perhaps you are right about that,” Snape agreed, and then added in a serious tone, “…but now is most certainly not the time to be lying to one another.”

A pause. “A little,” Harry confessed. “Are you?” Harry asked, once again regretting his words immediately, a flush of embarrassment entering his face. What a stupid question! Why the hell would he be nervous?

“Terrified.” The man said it so plainly, Harry thought for a moment that Severus was joking, that he must be mocking him for his question. But it only took one look at Severus for Harry to know that he might be more scared than he was – albeit for entirely different reasons.

Snape could clearly sense the boy’s anxiety, and he was beginning to think that perhaps this was too much too soon. He averted his eyes from Harry’s gaze, and found himself growing dizzier by the second. In a flash, all the urgency, all the mad lust, had been cleared from his mind. And all Snape could think of was that terrible night, and the fact that he had shared it with Harry – threatened him with it, in fact. Threatened him with the perverse desire to hurt him, to take him forcefully. And even though nothing could be further from the truth, Snape couldn’t help but worry that given how easily those horrible words had left his mouth as he lay cradled in the Dark Lord’s arms, that Harry might believe that some part of him wanted that…sex mingled with pain…and blood.

Snape felt his erection begin to wilt as he tried to control his swirling equilibrium.

Harry did not misunderstand Severus’s reaction. He grabbed the man’s hand and said, “We can wait, Severus, if you want to, but I don’t.”

Snape sucked in a breath, and said softly, “I don’t want to hurt you, Harry.” Whether it was an explanation or a justification, even he did not know.

But it came out almost like a plea. And Harry heard it as such. It was as though Severus was begging, pleading with him to believe his words. And Harry did.

“I know you won’t, Severus. I know,” Harry replied earnestly, pulling the man into a fierce embrace, a plea of his own for Severus to believe his words, his complete trust in the man. He followed it with a delicate kiss, which built, slowly at first, until both men were gasping for air, their tongues tacitly communicating their love, their revived desire.

As Snape pushed him back onto the bed, Harry was overcome with a sudden inexplicable gratitude that Severus had brought him here, into his bedroom, for this. He’d been here before, of course. Many times, in fact, during their long stay together in the dungeons. But this was different.

Harry barely had time to ponder his last thought before he felt his robe being removed and Severus’s mouth possessing him. The man’s breath rained hot and intoxicating all along his neck as he felt the very gentle nip of teeth and then sucking…all over – Severus seemingly finding the most sensitive spots to escalate his pleasure. Harry smiled as he felt Severus’s renewed erection pressing up against his side and his soft lips tasting his neck, kissing him – deep sucking kisses that removed all sense of time, all sense of reality. Harry opened his eyes in an attempt to ground himself, and not a second later his cock was swiftly enveloped in perfect wet warmth.

“Oh God!” Harry exclaimed.

The sensations were completely overwhelming as Severus moved up and down his length, swallowing him over and over again, breaking his movements only to suck on the sensitive head and lap at the forming wetness there.

Reveling in the taste of Harry in his mouth, Severus moaned, sending a reverberating shudder of pleasure through Harry’s cock – his panting inhalations a sign of impending climax. Sensing how close Harry was, Severus lifted his head and moved over Harry again, kissing him gently on the mouth.

“Are you absolutely sure, Harry?” Snape asked with a glint of concern. “I am happy to make you come just like this.”

Having regained some part of his senses, Harry breathed, “I want you to make love to me. I want to feel all of you.”

Snape smiled. “Then I’ll be right back.”

Harry used the minute Severus was gone to catch his breath and clear his mind. This is really going to happen.

Severus returned with a small pot of lubricant and two potion bottles. Setting them on the nightstand, he poured a liberal amount of each potion into the pot. While combining the mixture, he addressed Harry’s unspoken question. “A muscle relaxant and numbing agent…for good measure.”

“Is that really necessary?” Harry asked dubiously, realizing that Severus was being overly cautious.

“Yes,” Snape replied matter-of-factly. “Besides,” he added, in the darkest and most luscious of tones, “I want to make love to you all night long.”

The sentiment made Harry flush and he smiled. “Oh what an idea, Severus.”

“I’m not kidding,” Snape replied with a seriousness in his voice that disarmed Harry completely.

Raising his hips to accommodate the pillow Severus was sliding under him, Harry’s nervousness returned again in full force, although he did his best to hide it. It became easier to do once he felt Severus’s fingers stroking the sensitive spot behind his balls and then lower – the finger slowly circling his entrance, applying minimal pressure, teasing the tight ring of muscle. And then Severus’s other hand returned to Harry’s cock and began slowly stroking him back to full hardness. Harry barely felt the initial breach as Severus’s finger entered him moments later.

“Are you alright?” Snape asked, his voice slightly breathless, but ringing with concern.

“Yes,” Harry replied through a gasping breath as Severus’s grip on his cock tightened.

Severus’s finger pressed deeper inside him, moving in wider and wider circles, stretching him. Harry was surprised that he felt no pain at all, just the slightly odd sensation of having something down there, inside him, for the first time. Not too long after came the second finger. This time Harry could feel a slight stretching sensation, somewhat uncomfortable, but not painful, and he realized that Severus’s potions must be responsible for this. He was about to verbalize this last thought just as a wave of pleasure shot through him – a completely new sensation that began inside him but spread all through his abdomen and down into his legs. Something resembling a half-scream and a half-moan spilled from his lips.

He looked up to find Severus smiling at him. “I take it you liked that?” Snape asked, his voice low and husky.

Harry took a deep breath. “I didn’t know it would feel like that.”

“It gets better.”

Harry’s moans were growing louder by the second as Severus worked his fingers masterfully – slick and hot – stroking, stretching, and twisting inside him. Another touch over that magic spot and Harry was lost. He could barely register his surroundings, just that he was with Severus – completely enthralled in the mind-blowing pleasure he was giving him. The room seemed to be spinning – his need soared to the point of pain. He wanted Severus inside him, now.

“Severus, please…I want you,” Harry all but whined.

“Not yet,” Snape replied, as he began to push three fingers inside Harry, stretching him further. The sound of Harry begging him was sending Snape over the edge. He wanted Harry so badly, but he was determined not to be rushed, determined not to do anything that would hurt his lover.

After a few more minutes of gentle stretching, Snape could tell by the expression on Harry’s face and the moaning whimpers leaving his lips that he was ready. Snape coated his erection generously with lubricant, moved forward and kissed Harry on the lips.

Completely insane with need, Harry spoke before Severus even had the chance to ask, panting urgently, “I need you inside me. Now!”

Harry spread his legs as far as his body would allow, and Severus couldn’t prevent the gasp that escaped his mouth. Whatever nerves he may have had flittered away at the sight of Harry – on his bed, naked, gorgeous, eyes rabid with wanton need. “So beautiful, Harry,” Snape breathed.

He positioned himself at Harry’s entrance, feeling the boy’s legs wrapping tightly around his waist. Grabbing Harry’s hand, he pushed forward slightly, stopping just as the head of his cock entered Harry. Both men released a simultaneous gasp.

“Are you alright?” Snape asked, his jaw clenched from the strain of remaining still. Oh Merlin, Harry felt so good.

“Fine. Don’t stop,” Harry pleaded through hitching breaths. As Severus slid inside him – entering him with excruciating slowness – there was very little pain, just a slight burning sensation. Had there been any pain, however, Harry didn’t think he would even feel it – he had been on the edge of arousal for so long, he was desperate for release. Once Severus was fully buried inside him, Harry moaned, wholly overwhelmed by the exhilaration of this moment that surpassed even his wildest expectations. He marveled at how good it felt to have the hot thick length of Severus deep inside him, filling him so completely. This final, ultimate intimacy.

“Merlin, Harry,” Snape gasped, “you feel…so perfect.” Snape was breathing very hard, and focusing on remaining still. Harry felt incredible. So hot, so tight…he knew he was in heaven, or something very close to it. Part of him wanted to stay here like this forever, not moving, just feeling, but his body wanted different.

“Move…” Harry instructed, realizing after a moment that Severus was waiting for his permission.

Severus grunted and pulled back just far enough to rock back into Harry’s prostate, hitting the right spot on the first go. Harry was vaguely aware that he was saying something – incomprehensible gibberish mixing in with Parseltongue. Severus thrust a second time and Harry saw stars, his body was aflame and he was coming, shuddering helplessly through his release.

As soon as conscious thought returned to him, Harry winced at his lack of control. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m so sorry, Severus.”

“Don’t be sorry,” Snape replied, thrusting forward gently.

Harry groaned at the feeling as Severus rocked into his over-sensitized body. And somehow Harry understood that that was what Severus had wanted, for him to come just then, just like that, untouched.

“Don’t ever be sorry,” Snape repeated breathlessly. After a quick cleaning spell, he placed Harry’s legs on his shoulders, and leaned forward, pressing their bodies together.

And then came that dark sensuous voice Harry dreamed of every night, whispering in his ear, “We’re just getting started.”

“Oh God,” Harry gasped, as Severus thrust into him again and again. “I love…oh…I love the sound of your voice.”

“Hold onto me, Harry,” Snape instructed as his thrusts became longer, deeper. Harry gladly complied, clinging to Severus’s shoulders, his sides, his back, anything – surrendering to that perfect feeling of Severus inside him.

Snape’s mind was reeling from the sheer bliss of this moment – the devastatingly tight heat enveloping his cock. Enraptured in the feeling of Harry’s body, lost in pure euphoria, this unwavering ecstasy – he struggled for control, determined to keep this bliss forever.

Harry was delirious with sensation, loving the feeling of Severus claiming him, rocking ever so gently into his prostate, his over-sensitized body feeling every single movement – feeling every contour, every throb of his lover’s cock – as Severus slowly reawakened his. Looking at Severus only heightened his arousal further – the man was panting exquisitely, with fine beads of sweat on his brow, hair covering his face, his eyes lost in lust. And soon the fire was back in Harry’s belly and he was begging Severus to take him harder.

“I love you, Severus,” Harry moaned. And even as the words left him, he couldn’t have explained how much he wanted – needed – to hear those words returned in that moment.

As if he were reading Harry’s mind, Severus stilled his movements and said softly, “Look at me, Harry.”

As soon as their eyes met, Severus could not hold back…he wanted Harry to know, to really know.

“I love you,” Severus said. And as he spoke it, he let the corners of his mind brush ever so slightly against Harry’s. It wasn’t much, but it was enough, for in that moment Harry could feel the truth of Severus’s words. And just the idea of it, just the idea that Severus had let him in, even that much, was staggering to Harry. A truly unparalleled intimacy that left him completely undone.

It was a moment he would remember for the rest of his life – seeing the truth of those words in Severus’s eyes – believing it, believing him like he believed no other.

Harry reveled in the feeling, treasuring the thrill of touching Severus’s mind. The privilege was overwhelming – more so than having Severus’s cock buried deep inside him. But a moment of doubt crept into his mind, and Harry wondered if this was something Severus had done before.

It took less than a second for Severus’s strong voice to fill his head, ‘Never. I would never do this with anyone else, Harry.’

Harry’s gratitude turned to shock as Severus pulled out of him. Before he could protest, he was being pushed over and Severus was lying down behind him, both men now on their sides. Harry sighed in contentment as he felt Severus’s strong arms wrap around him, surrounding him completely. And a moment later, Severus had slid back inside him with a deep groan, and resumed his rocking, now so very slow and patient.

As they moved together, Harry could feel the faint edges of Severus’s mind brushing up against his own, the connection still unbroken. It was a sight in of itself – hints of color interspersed in shades of light and dark. Never having seen someone else’s mind before, and wholly unfamiliar with its structure, Harry couldn’t help but marvel at this vision. Spotting a particularly light region in the dark, grayed whole, he wondered and then asked, ‘What’s that?’ while pressing his mind against Severus’s so that he might understand the question.

Harry could feel Severus smiling against his neck as he replied, his voice full of raw sincerity, “That’s you, Harry. That’s you.”

Fully aware that there were now tears streaming out of his eyes, Harry struggled to control his whirlwind of emotions. But Severus heard it – the question, the doubt, the fear – deep in his mind, and told him to let it go.

‘What is it? Let me hear it!’ Severus implored, the movement of his hips still languorous and unhurried.

Harry gasped as the last thrust hit his prostate. A moment later, he admitted, ‘I don’t want this ever to end.’

‘It won’t,’ Snape promised, not misunderstanding Harry’s plea. ‘You’re mine now, Harry.’

Severus reached around, grabbed Harry’s head and pulled his mouth to his, thrusting his tongue inside.

‘I’m yours,’ Harry chanted mentally. ‘Totally yours.’

Harry lost himself in the sensation of being so completely possessed by another. It was better than he could have ever imagined – overcome with the feeling of completeness that flooded over him, setting fire to his soul. He felt like he was trapped – blessedly so – in some kind of nirvana. A nirvana that went on and on and on.

Many, many…many times when Harry neared his climax – and confident that Severus was not far behind judging from his breathless exclamations and his haphazard almost frantic thrusts – Severus would abruptly change his pace. Instead of finding release, Severus would instead resume his previous tantalizing rhythm – slow, relentless, and devastating – keeping both of them on the edge of arousal, skirting completion for what seemed like (and very well might have been) hours.

It was just as Severus had promised him – ‘all night long,’ in this ultimate exercise of delayed gratification coalescing into exquisite pleasure. The very definition of consummate love-making.

Harry would have been screaming from the torture of it, if it didn’t feel so incredibly good. It was in those moments – where frenzied urgent thrusting turned to slow, languid rocking, and even tender moments where they would stop and simply feel each other breathing – it was in those moments that Harry was coherent enough to realize the awesomeness of what they were doing – this transcendental joining of their bodies and minds.

And each time Harry would start to think, there would come another deep forceful thrust, catching him completely off guard with the intensity of it. He howled as Severus once again resumed his miraculous movements – the all-consuming penetration of his body – raising that indefinable need in him, tears flooding his eyes for the countless time that evening. Every cell in his body was screaming violently in pleasure, raging furiously in frustration, and begging urgently for release.

Sensing his almost painful desperation, Severus reached down, grabbed Harry’s leaking cock, and whispered, “Are you ready to come for me, Harry?”

“Oh God yes, please oh please, yes…” Harry began, the appeals for release becoming louder and more fervent with each spoken syllable.

Severus sped up his movements, driving his body into Harry’s while expertly pumping the young man’s pulsing cock with his hand. It took only a few strokes and the murmured command, hot in his ear, “Come for me, Harry,” before Harry obeyed, his body arching back against his lover’s, convulsing in an earth-shattering orgasm, as he screamed Severus’s name with abandon.

Severus was not far behind, the tightening of Harry’s body and the satisfied sounds of his release pushing him over the edge. Another two shallow thrusts and he was coming as well, ecstasy ripping through him as he climaxed deep inside Harry, emitting a primal cry in his ear.

After several long moments of heavy breathing, and with a great deal of effort, Severus murmured a cleaning spell. He placed a series of delicate kisses along Harry’s shoulders and neck, then slumped against Harry, tightening his protective hold around the young man.

“I love you,” Harry whispered, through still labored breathing.

“I love you too,” Snape replied.

“Can we stay like this all night?” Harry asked.

“I hadn’t planned on moving for a few days,” Snape replied dryly.

Harry smiled and snuggled back against Severus’s cradling warmth, reveling in this timeless moment. He could not imagine anything better. And he wondered if it would always be like this. This perfect. This special. This easy.

To Harry’s surprise, Severus must have heard him, because he replied significantly, his voice tender and heartfelt, “It’s never going to be easy, Harry. But as long as you’re with me…it will be perfect.”
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~ finis ~
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A/N: I hope you all enjoyed this fic. It has been a pleasure to write.

Thank you to everyone who reviewed this fic. Your comments have been much appreciated. Reviews are very good things!


**** Sept 2009: I am currently writing a sequel to this fic. I have 19 chapters posted already. You can find this story, entitled "In Memory's Wake" on ffnet here: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/953047/
****

I look forward to your comments.
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