Deserving (Final Chapter)

Chapter 33

Poppy entered Severus’ room with his morning potions.

“And how are you feeling this morning?” she asked

“Well. When will I be able to go home?” he asked with a scowl.

“Oh for Merlin’s sake stop that sour attitude. Don’t you know what day is today?”

Severus thought hard, what on earth was this witch talking about?

“Severus! It is Richard’s birthday and Dennis is bringing him over to see you,” she announced.

Richard and Harry’s birthday! He had not missed it.

“When will they be here?” he asked anxiously.

“I told Dennis to give me some time to get you fed and washed before he brought Richard. You wouldn’t want him to see you in this state.

No of course not. She was right. But why was Mr. Creevy coming? Why not only Harry and Richard?

The witch was all over him scanning with her wand, straightening out his sheets, summoning his breakfast.

“Dennis has even baked a cake. With Kreacher not being available and all…”

“When will Kreacher be freed?”

“Never you mind. You simply get ready for your boy. He has been asking about you day and night.

“Good morning!” said a cheerful Headmistress as she walked in the door. “I am sure you are in a better mood today it being Richard’s birthday and all,” she said with a broad confident smile.

“And may I remind you both that it also happens to be my husband’s birthday also.”

Minerva looked at him with an arched eyebrow. “Yes, well, what is important and pertinent to you is that you will be able to see your son. I am sure that is enough reason to celebrate. I hear Mr. Creevy has baked a cake,” she added for good measure.

“I will be permitted to see my husband, will I not?” He asked with as much authority as possible, hoping that would gain him his wish.

“No Severus, that criminal will not be stepping a foot in my castle,” said Minerva equal with authority.

“He is the father of my child and he has all the right to be at his son’s birthday and if I am not mistaken a jury has not found him guilty of any charge. To call him a criminal is totally uncalled for,” said Severus with a frown. “If you find that too unbearable then I will leave your castle.”

Minerva thought about his words. He was free to go if he so insisted. Knowing him he would start walking aimlessly away from the castle just to prove his point.

“One hour. That should be enough to sing and cut a cake. If you excuse me I will make myself scarce. I do not wish to see YOUR husband,” she turned on her heeals and left, followed by Madam Pomfry.

Soon after they left, he spotted his son in Dennis’ arms. Richard leaped into his arms and gave him a hug that made all of Severus’ grief disappear for an instant.

“Papa I was looking for you. I was looking and looking and no find you,” Richardhe said, raising his shoulders and hands in a quizzical mode.

“Oh you were, were you?, Wwell, you see, Papa was not feeling well and he came to see Madam Pomfrey because she knows how to cure people.”

“Is dada sick also? Where is he?”

“Dada has been at his job,” said Severus, trying desperately not to lie to his son.

“I’ve heard he has gotten time off to come celebrate your birthday,” interjected Dennis with a smile for both Severus and Richard.

“When will he be here?” whispered Severus into Dennis’ ears.

“The Aurors are bringing him as we speak,” whispered back the young wizard.

Harry was brought in by two Aurors on eitherat his side and a pair of handcuffs. Severus was the first to see him and brought Richard’s head to his chest in an attempt to spare his son the sigte of his father in cuffs. Dennis reacted instantly and went to speak to the Aurors who immediately took the cuffs off.

Severus whispered into his son’s hair: “Look who is here.”

“Dada, where were you? Where is Kreacher?”

Harry reached out and grabbed his son from Severus’ arms but not without scanning his husband from head to toe.

“How’s my boy?. I can’t believe you are turning one year old today,” Harry said with a wicked smile.

“DADA! I am two,” said Richard, holding out his fingers in a peace sign.

“Two! You can’t be two. Papa, can he be two?”

Severus smiled at his husband and child: “I am afraid so, our little Richard is growing up very fast.”

“I am big like Kreacher, right Papa?”

“Indeed you are,” he said, again smiling at his husband.

“Why don’t you open your gifts, Richard? Dada has very little time,” suggested Dennis.

Severus and Harry looked at each other in horror. Gifts! Their child had no gift, but right there and then Dennis whipped out three tiny gifts from his pocket and with a swish of his wand resized them.

Harry was so relievedf he gave Dennis a silent ‘thank you’ which Dennis repaid with a broad smile.

“This one is from me. Open it and see if you like it,” said Dennis.

“What is it? What is it?” asked an anxious Richard.

“Let’s open it,” suggested Dada.

Out came a little drum that Richard banged on very loudly, making Severus mouth the word ‘thank you’ with less heartfelt meaning than Harry’s. Then came one of the two presents marked as from Dada and Papa, it was little replica of the Hogwart’s Express. And last but not least the little broom very similar to the one Harry had found a picture of himself when he was a toddler. This time both parents turned to Dennis with a heartfelt ‘thank you’.

Richard and Dennis where entertained with the toys and Harry took that moment to speak to Severus.

“Are you alright?”

“Yes, HusbandSir, I am.”

“I mean are you whole?” asked Harry with fear in his voice which confused Severus.

“The potion did not work,” he said bowing his head.

“Thank Merlin,” said Harry with relief in his tone.

Severus’ head snapped up. Why was Harry happy that it did not work?

“I’ve done a lot of thinking and I really need you to understand why I did it. I did not want to hurt you. You’ve got to believe me, but there is something you don’t know. Something I should have told you a long time ago. It would have probably prevented all this.”

“Sir, I know you did not want to hurt me. Please, do not feel that you owe me any explanation.”

“But I do and once I explain it to you, you will see why. Look, you know me, I react instead of thinking things through and I almost got you killed… I don’t know what I would have done if I hadwould have caused you any harm. I was stupid. Snape, the Aurors have to take me back and I need time to explain this to you. But it is very important that you believe that I didn’t mean you any harm. You believe me, right?”

Severus nodded as the Aurors approached Harry.

“No! We haven’t sang or cut the cake. You can’t take him,” protested Dennis.

“It’s alright Dennis. They are only doing their job.”

Richard came over to Harry and extended his arms. Harry picked him up and kissed his forehead.

“You’re going to be a good boy for Papa and me. You have to mind Dennis while Papa and I sort some things out.”

“And Kreacher?” asked Richard yet again.

“Kreacher will be home waiting for you,” said Harry, ignorant to the truth.


***


Severus knocked on the huge wooden double doors before he walked in, wearing his black majestic robes. He was on a mission, a mission to save his family. He stopped in the middle of the spacious office and waited to be addressed. He could see the small plump woman watering her potted plants. She seemed so out of place with those clean green robes; always green. She turned and greeted him with a broad smile.

“Severus, so nice to see you in good health,” she said, reaching out to him with open arms.

He bentded over to meet her hug. “I am glad to see that you are in good health also.”

“Please, take a seat,” Madam Sprout directed him to the big tufted chair. “Remind me to show you the excellent specimen that Neville sent me when I was appointed Head of the Justice Department. He has always been so thoughtful,” she said with a smile as she poured the tea that she didn’t bother to offer. “Cream, no sugar, if my memory serves me right,” she said, not waiting for the answer. Severus simply nodded.

“Madam Sprout, I am here to ask your…”

“Yes, Severus I know why you are here. I was told you insisted on speaking to me. I believe you are under the impression that you can sway me from my decision. I have some questions for you, but I must warn you Severus Snape: if at any point I feel you are not genuine in your answers I will ask you to leave,” she said with a sympathetic smile.

A smile that did not deceive Severus. He had worked with the womaen for over twenty years and knew her well, she meant what she said. He decided right there and then to be as honest as his nature would allow.

“I have heard that you believe your husband to be innocent of all charges. Is this true?”

“If you will allow me to explain.”

“I will Severus Snape but remember my condition.”

Severus took in a deep breath and straightened out in his chair. “My husband and I decided that it would be well in our comfort zone if I did not have the same genitalia as he did.”

“Let me stop you here, Severus. How did it bother YOU to have the same genitalia as your spouse?”

She was more perceptive than he remembered her to be.

“In the years that you have known me, have you ever seen me attracted to a member of my same sex?”

“So what you are saying is that without your bits you would stop being a man? And this is something you want: to stop being a man?”

“NO! Oof course not. That is not what I am saying at all.”

“Severus you just said you are not attracted to the members of your own sex.”

“That was before.”

“Before? Before what, Severus?”

Severus took a deep breath in an attempt to keep his calm. “My husband is my Guide. It is his job to guide me to do what is correct; to guide me away from the dark side.”

“So what he did to you was a punishment?”

“NO! Madam Sprout, please stop twisting my words. My husband has long stopped punishing me.”

“Why did he punish you?”

He looked sour and cross at the witch. “Do you really need to ask? Do you not know of all my crimes?”

She pressed her lips together and dropped her head as she stirred her tea. She was clearly thinking and that made him nervous.

“And has Mr. Potter made you pay for all your crimes or do you still have more to gopay?”
He knew that was a loaded question. He knew that the condition stated that he had to be honest but would she understand?.

“I have only two more crimes to pay for, but my husband has been clear in how I am to pay and that there would be no other punishment. I will repeat to you what I have told the rest: this was not a punishment. He meant me no harm.”

“Can I ask what your punishment for these two crimes will be?”

“Not if you want me to be sincere.”

Pomona knew she had gotten him to talk more than anyone thought Severus Snape capable of speaking and she wanted to keep that line open.

“Back to you not liking men: true? Or is it that you do not like the fact that you are a man?”

Severus thought before saying: “My husband is a good man and a good father. I do like him very much and he is a man. We found ourselves in this situation and we have made the best of it.”

“Can you be more specific to what the situation is?”

Severus thought a bit more. “We both did not care for members of our own sex but once we were in the situation and with a child we have worked on making the best of it.”

“You are telling me that Harry was not attracted to his same sex?”

“You well know he was not a homosexual. He was first attracted to Miss Cho and then to Miss Weasley. You know that.”

“But it was his choice to request you as his Marked One. He could have picked a woman.”

“He is not out for in discriminatoryindiscriminately vengeance as Single is. He has helped many Marked Ones. Have you not heard?

“So his vengeance was towards you and only you?”

Severus dropped his head and mumbled. “…mother, father, Dumbledore.”

She had never heard the man mumble in all the years she had known him. He looked so defeated.

“So how many years of torture is he demanding for the death of his father and Duombledore?”

“HE IS NOT DEMANDING YEARS… of torture,” he ended with some semblance of composure.

“I am sorry Severus, I did not mean to upset you but since you mentioned three deaths I assumed these were the crimes Potter expects you to pay for.”

Severus looked away. “So these are the crimes you must pay for. And what would be an appropriate way to repay for these crimes, Severus?”

“Is this not the job of a Guide?”

“Is it? You would think so by the way most Guides have behaved to this point, but I assure you Severus I am out to make things right. Severus, the Guides were supposed to keep the Marked Ones from turning to the dark side. It was not their jobs to judge and sentence witches and wizards that had already been found innocent of any wrong doing by a court of their peers.”

“But the deaths?”

She held out a hand to stop him. “I believe you have Millicent living in your house. Do you believe Mr. Lang had the right to punish her and her child as he did?”

“NO! Of course not. She has never done anyone any harm. She is an innocent child caught in the middle of this insane war.”

“And Mr. Malfoy, do you believe him to be innocent of all crimes and deserving of the live that Kingsley gives him.”

“I know many would argue that he was more a participant than others, but you have to understand he was a child when he attempted to commit these crimes.”

“Was he not the same age you were when you took the mark? An event that you have not allowed yourself to be freed of guilt.”

“It is not the same. Malfoy was only trying to please his father. You would not understand how important it is for a boy to gain his father’s approval.”

“Severus, why is it so easy for you to make excuses for everyone else except for yourself? Why can’t you see that you are your worst enemy?”

Severus looked away from the witch. How did this conversation get so off track?

“Will you please forgive him and allow us to go back to our lives?” he mumbled again.

“You are asking me to send you back to a place where you will be punished for crimes that the Wizarding World has found you innocent of. Severus; Dumbledore asked you to kill him. And as much as I loved the old fool I will be the first one to admit that he was a manipulative old man. He asked it of you because he knew he could guilt you into doing so. He did not help you overcome your submissive behavior because it would work to his advantage. And the Potters were a sad loss but you had no way of knowing that your information would be used in the way it was used. No, Severus Snape, I cannot send you to your prison knowing you are an innocent man.”

Severus looked at Mona’s plants and identified the rare plant that Neville had given her. He stared at it intently but was far in thought.

“So do you expect me to live a happy and prosperous life knowing that I have not paid for the lives of two out of the three people I put in the ground?”

Mona’s shoulders slumped. Severus Snape had always been a difficult man. What possessed her to think that she could deal with him successfully?

“And will Harry’s punishment free you?” asked the witch, watching for any reaction from the wizard.

“I have repaid James’ life with the life of my son. Harry loves Richard and he is greatly loved by our son. I have repaid a life with a life and have had the unexpected bonus of having someone love me.”

She looked at him, trying to read what he had not said. Harry was making him pay an eye for an eye. She thought back to the report that she had read on her former coworker. Richard had been conceived out of rape and Severus was denied pain relief potions at his child’s birth.

“Will the other two be conceived and given birth to in pain? Is that your punishment, Severus Snape?” she asked tentatively and it wasn’t until she heard the words that she was convinced that she had hit the nail on the head.

“A small price to pay,” mumbled the once proud wizard.

“Severus Snape!” Pomona snapped. “Do you not see yourself? Look at you: you are mumbling. When in all the years I have known you have you ever spoken as an uneducated child? You are allowing a petulant child to reduce you to this and I will not allow it. Harry Potter will go to Azkaban on attempted murder charges. That is my final decision.”

Severus could not believe his ears. Harry going to Azkaban, how could that be? How did things get so out of control?. He straightened up to his full height.

“I will not allow it,” he said in an authoritative voice.

“I am afraid you have no say in the matter. Now if you will excuse me I have other businesses to tend to. Good day Severus,” she said as she turned to tend to her plants.

Severus felt defeated. He had failed miserably, but he had to save Harry. He did not beg. He had made it a vow in life never to beg and only broken it in Dumbledore’s office on the night he realized that Lily might die. It was time to break it again for her son and his husband.

“I beg you: do not send my husband to Azkaban. I will be in your dept eternally if you spare him from this fate,” he pleaded with a low but strong voice.

Mona considered his words. She had him just where Minerva wanted him to be. Would Severus actually consent to the divorce, a divorce that would separate him from the only person that could free him from his guilt?

“I do believe he deserves Azkaban but I am more worried about you and your child. Severus, you can actually be instrumental in the changes I want to bring to the Wizarding World. You can actually help the cause. Divorce Harry and I will spare him from prison,” she baited.

“But I cannot do this. He will think that I have gone back on my word and am abandoning him. Mona, you have no idea what that would do to him.”

“Severus, right now my number one concern is to get you and your child safely out of that household.”

“But we are not in any…”

Mona lifted her hand. “I have told you my terms. Please do not waste my time. I am sure you can see yourself out,” she said turning again towards her plants.

“He will never consent,” whispered Severus.

“He does not need to consent. I do believe that attempted murder falls into the grounds for a divorce act.”

“Only mutual consent can divorce soul mates,” stunning her with his words.

“Soul mates?”

He nodded his confirmation.

“Why have I not been informed of this?”

“I do not believe it to be general knowledge. In fact, besides me the only other living creature that knows is our elf Kreacher.”

“Are you trying to tell me that Harry doesn’t know this?”

He simply shook his head.
“But how could he not know? Surely your scent must be appealing to him.”

“It is but he has no knowledge of why it is so appealing to him. You must remember that he was Muggle raised.”

“He attended Hogwarts,” countered the witch.

“Yes, and spent a great deal of time in the hospital wing and in other non-curriculum activities. Apparently he missed that lesson.”

“And it never dawned on him to seek the reason of this attraction towards you and your appealing scent?”

Severus shook his head again as he watched her summon their marriage license and sure enough their names appeared in blue ink: a sure sign of a soul mate couple. She let the parchment fall to her desk and rubbed her forehead in frustration. She soon recuperated and decided she would not let Severus off the hook. He did not want to see Harry go to Azkaban and he would do whatever it took to keep him out of it.

“Then I am afraid he will have to go to Azkaban. There is no other alternative.”
Severus could not allow this to happen. He could not allow the wretched witch to send Harry to Azkaban.

“And if I get him to consent to the divorce?”

“Then you will both be free men,” concluded the witch as she proceeded to water her plants.

Severus took one look at the rare plant that Mona had been gifted and knew exactly what had to be done. He turned on his heels and worked out of there with the same powerful walk with which he had entered. Once behind the two big wooden doors he let his shoulders slump. He could never face Harry and ask him for a divorce. He would not be able to bear seeing Harry’s hateful glare when he realized that his husband was also abandoning him. But this had to be done he knew who to turn to.

***

Neville entered through Shacklebolt’s floo and found himself faced with Severus.

“Professor, Draco said you wanted to see me. How can I help you?’

“Please take a seat Mr. Longbottom,” said Severus pointing to the high wing chair.

“Professor, if you don’t mind I will stand.”

Severus could see that Neville was uncomfortable and he soon figured out why, Neville was probably expecting him to ask him to help Harry.

“Mr. Longbottom, “

“Neville, please Professor,” he corrected.

“Only if you will have the same courtesy towards me and stop calling me Pprofessor. You have said that you have feeling for me and it is quite awkward to have a would be lover call me Professor,” said Severus and waited for his reaction.

“LOVER!” said Neville shocked by Severus’ words.

“You have mentioned that you have feelings for me; have you not?”

Neville blinked trying to make sense of what he had heard.

“Well, have you or have you not feeling towards me, Mr… Neville?” pProdded Severus.

“Yes! Of course I do. I have never kept it a secret, but you have never shown any interest. I thought that you didn’t want to leave Harry. That you were looking for any and every way to keep him out of Azkaban and by you side.”

Severus looked away. “Yes, Neville, I would like it to be as you have described, but unfortunately it is not possible. My husband will go to Askaban if I am not able to get consent for divorce from him. These are the conditions for his freedom that Madam Sprout has imposed.” Severus paused to allow Neville to digest the information given then he continued: “You see my husband and I are soul mates and therefore we require mutual consent in order for a divorce to bme possible.”

“And you believe he will not give it to you if you ask him?”

Severus shook his head. “I know he will give it to me if I ask but…” Severus could not find the words to continue.

“You don’t have the heart to ask him,” said Neville, completing Severus sentence.

Severus looked up to him in amazement. “Do you really believe that you have been able to keep your love for Harry a secret? Severus, why else would you have put up with…”

“I have crimes to pay for.”

“Is that the reasoning you give yourself? Does that make it more bearable? Severus, why exactly have you called me over for?” asked Neville, thinking he knew where this was headed.

Severus took a deep breath and straightened up. “I do not want my husband to go to Azakaban, but I am unable to face him and ask for a divorce. I was wondering if you would be interested in a deal.”

“A deal?”

“If you can get my husband to give me a divorce I will marry you.”

Neville looked at him with pity. The man he loved, the man he had admired for so long had such a low self esteem. He had no idea what his life was worth but Neville would make sure he would learn his worth.

“You will marry me.”

“If that is what you want? Yes.”

“Is it what you want?”

“I know you to be a kind man. I know you will be good to me and my son. Is this not what everyone wants to see happen?”

Neville slumped in defeat. Severus needed so much help.

“And how exactly do you expect me to get Harry to consent?”

“It will be quite easy. Simply go and tell him that we would like to wed and we will need his consent to the divorce in order to speed things up. Tell him we cannot wait to be together,” said Severus, falling to the seat next to him.

Neville could see how hard those words were to pronounce.

“So that is it. You are willing to marry a man you do not love in order to save the one you do.”

“Is that not what one does?” said Severus, looking into the fireplace unaware that he had just confessed his love for Harry.

“Yes, Severus that is what one does for those we love. I will be back soon with your freedom,” said Neville as he disappeared through the floo.