Angelica's Sorrow

A/N - Dang nab it all to heck - I forgot to make a copy of the reviews & now it won\'t let me pull them up to answer. Thank you, all that reviewed - I\'ll do better next time.

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

Severus and Hermione had just fini gra grading the last of the homework papers and had done a fair amount of grumbling back and forth over who had the most incompetent students. Hermione was winning, but not by much. They were in his study, sitting across from each other at a two-person desk. It was the same desk Severus had used for years, but the other side had remaiemptempty until now. He was heartily glad it had never been replaced.

\"Severus, have I apologized yet for all the things I put you through?\" Hermione asked. She put her quill down and sighed in relief, stretching her hand.

\"No. Actually you were one of the few whom it was almost a pleasure to teach.\"

\"You could have fooled me. I believe the final total of points you took from Gryffindor on my account was 2,655.\"

\"You kept track? I can\'t believe you did that.\"

\"Well, I had to make sure I tried to earn enough in my other classes to make up those points,\" she said.

\"Did you?\"

\"Yes. I usually came out a little ahead,\" she smirked.

\"Ah, I\'m sure Minerva helped you out a great deal.\"

\"No, actually it was Charms that helped the most. I\'m almost as good at those as I am in potions.\"

\"Really? I\'m surprised you didn\'t apprentice in Charms then.\"

\"I did consider it, but it isn\'t as much of a challenge. Potions give you more of a chance to experiment.\"

\"Just how much experimenting have you done?\"

\"Not much since I didn\'t have my own lab, but I\'ve made lots of notes on things I want to try someday.\"

\"You will allow me to see these notes before you try anything won\'t you?\"

\"Don\'t you trust me?\"

\"Trust is not the issue. There is the distinct possibility that I have already tried some of the things in your notes and could provide you with results of my own. I\'d rather like your input on some I felt should have been a success. There are a few I have worked on for at least ten years and have never found the answer.\"

\"If you haven\'t been able to solve them what makes you think I could?\"

\"Fresh eyes sometimes see things that should be obvious. I\'ve noticed you have an almost intuitive grasp on what will work in a potion and what won\'t.\"

\"Flattery like that will get you far indeed, Professor Snape,\" Hermione purred as she stood and walked over to his side of the desk. She stood behind him and began giving him a neck and shoulder massage. His head dropped as she continued to knead the tight muscles in his shoulders.

\"You\'re going to put me to sleep if you don\'t stop,\" he threatened. He reached up and grasped one of her hands, pulling her around to sit on his lap. \"This apprentice business is really starting to grow on me.\"

\"You liked that did you?\"

\"Yes, now quit talking, apprentice. We have other things we need to take care of at this point in time,\" he stated while nibbling on her neck.

\"Um, like - what?\" she whispered.

\"Let me show you,\" he growled against her ear. He smirked as she shivered in his arms.

\"It couldn\'t be the subject that is hardening as we \'speak\' is it?\" she teased, wiggling her bottom against him.

\"Have I told you what a wicked wench you are?\" he asked, sliding his hand under her skirt and teasing the edge of her knickers.

\"Not lately, but - Oh! Do that again, please.\"

\"You mean, this?\" he asked, sliding his finger inside the edge of the elastic to tease her nub.

\"Yyeess.\"

\"Or this?\"

Two fingers found her moist opening while his thumb took over the pleasurable job of stroking her nub. His mouth finally engulfed hers and she was lost. His other hand found its way under her blouse, stroking the underside of her breast, making its way to the front clasp of her bra. He was getting rather adept at unhooking them. Finally they were free and he found a nipple to tease. Her hips were almost sliding off his lap with their action and he was forced to let go of her breast to grab her waist. His mouth swallowed her moans as her muscles clenched around his fingers. He continued stoking and thrusting while opening his eyes, loving to watch the flush spread. When she was totally spent and relaxed he removed his hand from under her skirt. Gathering her close, he kissed her face and neck until her breathing slowed.

\"I take it you approved?\" he asked.

\"You can do that anytime you like.\"

\"Anytime?\"

\"Severus! Wipe that leer off your face. I should qualify that and saw anytime we\'re alone and not in public.\"

\"I should have known there\'d be a clause somewhere. Shall we retire to the bedroom?\"

\"Actually, if you don\'t mind - we\'re in the perfect location for a small fantasy of mine.\"

\"And that would be what?\"

\"Oh, you\'ll see.\"

\"Hmm. I think we might have a go,\" he said, as she stood.

She walked over to the side of the desk and leaned back against it as he stood in front of her. Severus lowered his head to claim her mouth again as he started to unbutton her blouse. He pulled back in surprise as she swatted his hands away and fastened her bra.

\"What\'s wrong?\" he asked.

\"This is my fantasy, remember?\"

\"I\'m just doing my best to assist you.\"

\"I want you to sit in your chair, pretending to grade exams or papers or something.\"

She waited while he complied.

\"You are in a foul, rotten mood, Professor Snape. The day has been miserable for you and sixteen students have melted cauldrons. It\'s been a long time since you\'ve had sex with anyone. When I come through that door, I am a total stranger you have never met and don\'t know.\"

\"It would be doubtful that anyone unknown to me could get through the wards, Hermione.\"

\"Severus! Will you just play along and quit being so logical? This is a fantasy remember, not real life.\"

\"I understand, but how am I supposed to \'play along\' when you\'ve already granted any wish oul oul could possibly have just by being with me?\" he said as he rose to take her face in his hands, kissing the corners or mor mouth. \"It might be possible in about fifty years for me to fantasize about being with a stranger, but the reality of you is much more stimulating and still seems like such a miracle that it\'s difficult to even think along those lines.\"

\"Oh, that was so sweet,\" she sniffed, while putting her arms around his waist and laying her head on his chest.

\"No, I am not \'sweet\'. It\'s merely the truth. I know romance is important to a woman, but I\'ve never felt comfortable sprouting the \'sweet nothings\' required. Bringing you flowers or candy is something that would never occur to me.\"

Hermione lifted her head and looked in his eyes. There was a hint of sorrow there, but it was tempered with a great deal of love. \"I have a great idea. How would you like to see the present you bought me? I\'ll go get it and meet you back here.\"

\"I think I could be persuaded to attend a short fashion show as long as you\'re the only model.\"

\"I\'ll be right back,\" she said as she headed for the door. \"Don\'t go away.\"

\"That\'s something that needn\'t be a concern,\" he chuckled.

Severus settled back into his chair as she left, thinking about Hermione\'s fantasy. Someday he might be able to go through wit. it. \'She probably doesn\'t realize how many nameless women have marched their way through my life. Probably should let her know that it wouldn\'t be a fantasy for me. Would it upset her that I don\'t know how many there have been? And then there\'s the history with Narcissa. How much and how soon do I tell her? It\'s been so long ago. Merlin\'s robe - it\'s been twenty-two years. Longer than Hermione\'s been alive. Gods, I\'m old. Perhaps too old for her.\'

He stood and started pacing, still thinking. \'Am I being fair to her? Could be someone out there younger, fresher, not so bitter that could love her the way she deserves. What if in two years after the apprenticeship is done, she decides to move on without me? Could I bear to let her go?\' The anguish he felt visualizing the scene was enough for him to know it wasn\'t possible. \'Would she accept a proposal of marriage? It\'s too soon. She would probably bolt. Best to stay with the original schedule. Not until Christmas, then.\'


Hermione hurried through to her bedroom, checking the time. It was late enough there shouldn\'t be any students wandering the hallways. She was going to chance it, besides with a cloak over the top it wouldn\'t be visible. Her hands were trembling slightly as she undressed and performed a freshing charm. Standing naked in front of her mirror she pulled her hair up in a twist and left tendrils hanging down. \'That takes care of the bushy mess. Now, on to the fun.\'

She pulled the ensemble from her dresser drawer and reverently laid it out on the bed. She pulled on the lacy, barely there thong in the palest of blues. The cloud of the matching sleeveless negligee was soon billowing around her feet while she laced the scanty bodice closed. She debated wearing the peignoir thinking it might be too much, but shivered in anticipation of its removal. Slipping her feet into the slippers she posed in front of the mirror in various ways, finally deciding to leave the robe unfastened. Grabbing her cloak and throwing it around her shoulders she hurried out of her bedroom, stopping in surprise. Hedwig was standing on the back of one of her sitting room chairs.

\"Hello there. What do you have for me?\" she asked as she untied the note. \"I hope nothing\'s wrong. Please, wait in case there\'s a reply,\" she said, unfolding the paper.


Hermione,

Hope this note finds you well. I\'ve got some business with Dumbledore at ten tomorrow morning and I thought it would be a good time to catch up on a few things. If you can I would really like to meet you for breakfast at the Three Broomsticks around eight thirty. I would appreciate your coming alone so we could talk freely.

Love, H.

\'That\'s decidedly odd. I don\'t think he\'s ever signed anything love before. Course he knows it took someone I love to break the spell, maybe that\'s why. Wonder what it is he wants to talk about? Thought we got pretty well caught up at St. Mungo\'s. This will cut my morning short with Severus. Hope he won\'t growl too much.\' She penned a quick acceptance for Harry and tied it to Hedwig\'s leg. \"Please, take this to Harry. Thank you,\" she said as the owl took off. It always amazed her the way they found their way through the castle.


\'What in the world can be taking her so long?\' Long fingers drumming the top of the desk were the only outward sign of impatience. \'She did say she\'d be right back and it\'s been twenty minutes. I know for a fact -\' His thoughts and fingers were halted in mid grumble as a temptress found her way into his quarters. Her cloak dropped at the threshold and the exquisite creature smiled at the stunned expression that found its way to his face.

\'He\'s right. Who needs fantasy when there\'s reality.\'



\"Severus, you need to let me go. I don\'t want to be late,\" she whispered in his ear. \"You can go back to sleep, but I need to get up.\"

\"Tell Potter to bugger off, why don\'t you,\" he growled, half awake, only knowing he didn\'t want to release his hold on her. \"Meet him for lunch instead.\"

\"I already accepted his invitation for breakfast.\"

\"Damned inconsiderate for someone who considers himself your friend.\"

He pulled her closer, delighting in the feel of her skin against his, so soft, so warm. His mouth found its way to her neck and he began kissing and nipping his way to her breast. \'After last night I can\'t believe how much I want her again. Will it ever be so?\'

\"S-stop. I have to get up now. There\'s barely enough time for me to shower and get dressed.\"

\"I suppose I could shower with you.\"

\"Nooo - you don\'t. I know what kind of shower it would turn into and then I\'d really be late. You stay right here and wait for me. I should be back by ten at the latest. That\'s when he\'s meeting with Albus.\"

\"Umm. You are a stubborn wench.\"

\"I notice you only say that when you don\'t get your way.\"

\"Hurry back.\"

\"I will.\"


Hermione apperated to the edge of Hogsmeade and made her way to the Three Broomsticks. Glancing around inside she saw Harry seated at a corner table with a pot of tea on it and went to join him, thinking Severus would have stood and pulled the chair out for her. She was getting spoiled and realized she liked it.

\"Hermione, I\'m so glad you could join me this morning. You\'re looking good. Old Snape not working you too hard I hope? Tea?\"

\"Yes, please. He hasn\'t been hard to work with at all. Believe it or not it\'s the students that are driving me insane. I don\'t know how the professors have done it fo loo long without totally going bonkers. I have a first year student who\'s worse than Neville ever thought of being. Oh, he\'s here right now, too.\"

\"Who, Neville? Why?\"

\"Oh, uh - I\'m sure that\'s probably part of what Albus wants to discuss with you. I shouldn\'t have said anything.\"

\"Now you have my curiosity really aroused. Why are you blushing?\"

\"Oh, nothing,\" she said, wishing he had chosen another word. \"What did you want to talk about that\'s so confidential?\"

\"A number of things really. I was talking to Arthur last night about starting a DADA school for adults. He\'s the only one I\'ve talked to about it and he seems receptive. You\'re the first one I thought of when I realized I needed help setting up the plans.\"

\"That\'s quite an undertaking. I\'m going to be very busy for the next two years. I don\'t know how much time I would have to help.\"

\"I\'ve got to finish Auror training first. Then I want to take private lessons, so we\'re talking at least three to four years before anything has to be finalized.\"

\"This goes back to our discussions with Ron doesn\'t it? About how unprepared everyone was for the upcoming battle.\"

\"Yes. It\'s been at the back of my mind for a long time. I think it\'s necessary and with Arthur\'s support I think it can happen.\"

Rosmerta chose that moment to come and take their order. After she left Hermione turned in her chair and studied Harry.

\"This is really important to you isn\'t it?\"

He nodded his head, eyes locked on his clasped hands. One of her hands stole into his line of sight and gently squeezed his.

\"I\'ll help you as much as I can, whenever I can,\" she said, giving his hands a final squeeze and sliding back to her own lap. \"What are friends for?\"

\"Thank you. It\'s not going to be an easy project to set up. We\'ll have to consider daycare for people with children, night classes and possibly dormitories.\"

\"Are you just going to offer DADA classes?\"

\"That\'s all I\'ve considered. Why?\"

\"Oh, just that there are a few charms, potions and transfiguration spells that might be a good idea to teach as well. Things that aren\'t covered at Hogwarts.\"

\"I might consider expanding it later, but it all depends on how well it goes the first few years.\"

\"That makes sense. Was - here comes our breakfast.\"

Rosmerta quickly placed their orders on the table along with a fresh pot of tea. She smiled at the two of them and asked, \"Is there anything else you need?\"

\"No, it looks wonderful,\" Hermione said.

\"Nothing more right now, thanks.\"

\"Let me know if you want anything else. It\'s really good to see you, Harry. You\'ll have to come in more often,\" Rosmerta said as she crossed the room to a new table of customers.

\"This place sure brings back memories,\" Harry said, looking around.

\"Yes, it does. It doesn\'t seem right though without Ron being here with us,\" she whispered.

\"He\'s here in spirit. He\'ll always be with us.\"

\"You\'re right. We should have ordered butterbeer to toast him.\"

\"We can do that. Rosmerta! Could we have two butterbeers, please?\"

\"Harry! For breakfast?\"

\"Why not? When did we ever do what was expected of us? Why start now?\"

\"True.\"

\"Bit early isn\'t it?\" Rosmerta asked as she placed two butterbeers in front of them.

\"We need them to toast an absent friend,\" Harry said.

\"Ah, I understand. Consider them on the house. I liked Ron as well.\"

\"Thank you.\" Harry picked up one and turned to Hermione. \"To Ron - wish you were here, mate.\"

Hermione picked up her own and said, \"I miss you, Ron.\"

She touched her glass to Harry\'s and they both drank deeply, lost in the memories of their young friend. A burst of laughter from across the room broke their mutual reverie.

\"We\'d best eat before it gets cold,\" she said. \"Ron would never approve if we let it go to waste.\"

\"That\'s true,\" he laughed. \"He\'d be horrified.\"

\"Was there something else you wanted to talk about?\" she asked, spreading some jam on a slice of toast.

\"I was wondering if you would go out with me, say next Friday or Saturday night. Dinner, maybe a little dancing. I can actually dance now and not put your feet in danger.\"

\"Go out - you mean a date?\" she asked.

\"Yes, Hermione. A date. As in guy goes to girl\'s door, they go out, have fun, - maybe snog a little.\"

\"Harry, this is Hermione you\'re talking to remember?\"

\"I know who I\'m talking to. I\'ve been biding my time for quite a while.\"

\"The thing is - I\'m seeing someone right now.\"

\"Are you engaged?\"

\"No.\"

\"Going steady?\"

\"No.\"

\"Have you agreed to only see each other?\"

\"Well, no but -\"

\"Then what\'s the problem?\"

\"I\'m in love with him, Harry. I can\'t even contemplate going out with someone else. It wouldn\'t feel right and I won\'t do it.\"

\"Is it Snape?\"

\"Who told you?\"

\"Does it matter?\"

\"It matters that we\'d like to keep it private.\"

\"No one at Hogwarts knows? I find that hard to believe.\"

\"The staff knows, but we prefer to keep it private from the students.\"

\"Hermione, how can you hope to have a life with him? He\'s too old for you.\"

\"I didn\'t say I had a life with him. I said I\'m in love with him. We\'re just starting to explore what we have for each other. It\'s too soon in our relationship to think about casting anything in stone. He\'s not rushing me if that\'s what you think.\"

\"It seems awfully soon to me. You\'ve been out from under the spell what - two months? How long is that to know you\'re in love with someone?\"

\"I\'ve been in love with him for over a year and I have reason to believe he\'s loved me almost as long.\"

\"Are you sure he loves you?\"

\"Yes.\"

\"Well, I\'m giving you fair warning. I\'m not giving up until you\'re married and no longer free, Hermione.\"

\"Harry, be reasonable.\"

\"No, I was reasonable while you were going with Ron and look where it got me. Nowhere.\"

To say she was stunned was an understatement. \'He\'s thought about this that long? How had he hidden it? Should I tell Severus? Do I dare not to? If he found out from someone else, he would be devastated and very angry. This isn\'t fair! Things are finally working out the way I want and Harry - of all people - is threatening to mess it up.\'

\"Harry, I don\'t know that I want marriage from anyone. I don\'t particularly want children right now and that would probably be the only reason I would get married. So, when you say you won\'t give up until I\'m married you could be talking about a very long time.\"

\"You don\'t want children? But you\'d be a great mother.\"

\"I\'m glad you think so. I didn\'t say ever, I said right now. There are too many things I want to do, to see. Maybe in ten or twenty years I\'ll change my mind. It\'s not like I have to decide right away. You gave me fair warning - now I\'ll warn you. I have a hard time accepting this declaration of yours, mostly because you don\'t speak of love. I love you, yes. But not the way I love Severus. It took me a long time to admit that I didn\'t love Ron the way he wanted me to and I\'m not going to go through something like that again. I swear to you, Harry, if you cause me to lose Severus I will never forgive you.\"

Harry met her eyes, read the seriousness in them and said softly, \"I guess that\'s the chance I\'ll have to take, because I do love you and want to spend my life at your side.\"