Dirty deeds

24 January (Friday evening – council of war)

Felt a bit better after had blown nose, applied cold flannel to face, and downed third glass of brandy. Lucius seemed so sure that Severus just got cold feet. Just a matter of tracking him down, find out what on earth he was wobbling for, and then could fall into his arms and shag like bunnies.

Pushed very firmly to back of head the thought that Lucius might be wrong. Couldn’t be wrong. Severus couldn’t have gone from being soppy bastard and Slytherin sex machine to heartless bastard in less than four days.

All some terrible mistake. Will sort it out and then go back to being happy. Just don’t seem to be able to stop snivelling which isn’t very helpful. Alternate between snivelling and wanting to hex his fucking balls off.

Ooops. Have broken glass. Probably expensive hand cut crystal handed down through the generations, although knowing Lucius its just as likely to be from Woolies. He wouldn’t want to risk the good stuff on a woman in my emotional state.

Quick reparo and no one will be wiser.

Bundle of nerves waiting for feedback and keep pacing backwards and forwards.

Seemed like days before a gentle tap on the door signalled Harry fetching me to the council of war. He couldn’t meet my eyes. Doesn’t look like good news then.

Shall become an anchorite. Is the romantically approved thing to do in case of heartbreak. Not sure what one is, other than some sort of nun.

Meeting consists of Pansy, Ginny, Harry, Ron, Draco, and Lucius. Could well do without the junior Malfoy, but think he can tell that if he makes one remark out of place he will be going through the windows, daddy’s reputation for being a duelling master or not.

Got a hair trigger at the moment, and most people here have seen it in action often enough not to want to see it again. Remind self that they are here to help and that a hexed person often finds it difficult to be helpful.

Pansy goes first. Sister reports that Severus being an even bigger bastard than usual and has even been deducting points from Slytherin. Not a good sign. He looked strained and unwell and didn’t appear to be sleeping well. I don’t imagine that is what the little brat said, but Pansy had the sense to edit for wider consumption. May be prepared to insult and hex bastard by that is my privilege and no one else’s.

Looking encouraging so far. If really was complete tosser would be dancing around with glee. Seems to be displaying all signs of heartbreak which is good news in one way, although complete blinding puzzle in another. What is the silly sod up to?

Harry’s report next. Confirmed that Severus was on the premises using the Marauder’s Map. Appeared to be in his quarters. Dumbledore estabablished to be lying son of a bitch. But we knew that anyway. If anyone thinks Harry has forgiven or forgotten Dumbledore conveniently forgetting to mention that prophecy for so long, well they must be very stupid is all I can say. Suspect Dumbledore in that category.

He will have to pay for that little fib, and I shall turn my mind to something suitable. Shame that days of being schoolgirl over and can no longer send envelope’s full of bubotuber puss to people that piss you off. On the other hand, can actually cast much nastier hexes then when was at school so swings and roundabouts really. I think that beard he is so fond of needs to go. Probably some sort of penis substitute for him. Since wizard’s don’t have cars, the nearest equivalent they can get to saying my dick is bigger than your dick, is to grow a very long beard.

Dobby has been recruited as information source or spy on our behalf. Will be sending reports to us by owl. All that time spent teaching him to read and write has paid off after all.

Harry still looking a bit shifty though. So I ask him what the bad news is. Apparently I am forbidden from entering Hogwarts grounds. They don’t just have anti-apparition wards, now they have anti-Hermione wards. Only way I can get in is if I am invited by a member of staff, and since only likely person to do so and stand up to Dumbledore is McGonagall and I called her a harridan and told her to fuck off, I don’t like my chances.

Christ when I was at Hogwarts you couldn’t move for deatheaters, and other nasty people sneaking into the school at night to do bad things to the students and occasionally the teachers. You couldn’t walk around late at night without bumping into someone up to no good.

Now was not the time to tighten up school security.

Feel a bit better. Clear that whatever going on does not mean that Severus fallen out of love with me. Council agree with that, and general consensus appears to be that the prospect of meeting my in-laws was too much for him and he has bottled it.

Therefore is imperative that I get into Hogwarts and get hold of him to persuade him that whatever is wrong can be sorted out.

Damn Dumbledore.

Shall set his beard on fire.


Was late and all decided to go to bed. Would reconvene once had first report from Dobby and then work out a strategy. Temper cooled slightly now so prepared to admit that first choice of storming the castle and putting Dumbledore to the sword (alright wand) was not likely to be the most productive.

However have gone from heartbreak to fury back to heartbreak again all in one day. Feel very tired. Also have to admit to being very worried that something serious wrong. Although there had bloody well better be something seriously wrong bearing in mind the amount of sodding anxiety the bastard has put me through.

What on earth is going on with Severus?