A Heart So Ravenous (Sequel to A Love So Belated)
folder
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
44
Views:
36,873
Reviews:
326
Recommended:
1
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
44
Views:
36,873
Reviews:
326
Recommended:
1
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Chapter 30: A Pact
Chapter Number/Total: 30/44
Chapter Title: A Pact
Words: 2095 Words
Draco was propped up in bed with a tray beside him. It no longer fit in his lap, so it was awkward to use as a writing surface. He finally left the ink on the tray but placed a book under the parchment and balanced it on his belly to write. He went through several sheets of parchment before he finally got one he was willing to send. He didn’t know if this would be the last letter his father would ever get from him and he wanted it to be a comfort to him, if needed.
Dear Father,
Your letter cheered me more than you can know. I have missed you and thought about you often. I wish there were a way I could come to visit you. Mother is correct. I am ill and currently confined to my bed until I improve. You may be assured that Mother has found an excellent Healer to tend me and I am doing my best to take care of myself.
Before I became too ill to work in the lab, I had actually developed several new potions. I have explained one of them to the Healer who has my care and she has been very impressed. There is every possibility that this line of research might lead to some real breakthroughs in the future.
It has been a busy year, as you no doubt know. Aside from my health issues, I am very happy with my life. We live at the old Black house and I have my own lab. Harry is in Auror training and I see Mother often.
I have recovered from the incident of last February and am doing what I can to leave it in the past. Harry has been supportive in every way. Even if you don’t approve of him personally, you would no doubt be satisfied with his treatment of me.
I love you. I don’t know how often I have said it. It certainly hasn’t been enough. While it is obvious that there are several areas where we disagree, I want you to know that I have always admired and respected you. And that I have always been, and still am, proud to be your son.
Draco
***
It was not very late in the day. Harry had only left a few hours earlier, and Draco was propped on pillows on the couch, a book open against his belly. It was one day that his mother actually wasn't coming over. She was, of all things, having Andromeda and Teddy to the Manor, so it was quiet in the house with only Kreacher there.
Right then, as if on cue, Kreacher popped into place beside the couch. "Someone be here, Master," he said.
"Who?" Draco asked, frowning.
"The blood traitor," Kreacher answered.
"Which blood traitor?" Draco asked, part irritated and part amused.
Kreacher cocked his head slowly to the side as if thinking for a moment. "Weasley," he said finally, seeming pleased with himself for remembering.
"Which Weasley? Oh, never mind, have whoever it is come in," Draco said, huffing.
Kreacher nodded, popping away again, and within a few short moments, someone knocked on the door frame of the sitting room. It was Ron.
Draco's eyes widened. "Is Harry okay?" he asked, worried at the man's sudden appearance.
"Oh," said Ron. "Yeah. Yeah, he's okay. I actually haven't even seen him today." He shifted where he stood, clearly feeling awkward.
The blond arched an eyebrow and waited, wondering what Ronald Weasley could be doing there when the man knew Harry wasn't home.
"Er ..." said Ron, seemingly forcing himself to meet Draco's eyes. "Can I sit down?"
Draco gestured to a nearby chair. "Certainly," he said. "Do you want tea?"
"I ... guess that would be fine," said Ron, sitting in the indicated chair.
Draco called Kreacher and had him bring tea for the two of them.
Ron busied himself with making his cup, while Kreacher prepared Draco's for him automatically. Once it was clear Ron could take no more time getting sugar, he sat back with his cup, looking like he didn't know where to start.
Draco arched an eyebrow again, but said nothing. He was in no hurry and it was amusing to watch Ron squirm.
Ron sighed quietly, pursing his lips for a moment before opening his mouth. "I ... know you don't like me," he said.
Draco tilted his head. "I was under the impression that it was mutual," he said softly.
Ron frowned and looked down at his tea. "Well, I – I guess it is," he said. "But ..." his ears turned red, "I suppose that doesn't mean I can't be ... sorry. I know I ... hurt Harry's feelings back when you two told us about the babies."
"No father wants to hear someone question the paternity of his children," Draco responded.
Ron sighed again. "I know," he said. "It just, well ... it can get hard sometimes – to hold back, I mean. I suppose I still don't really know you, or, well, the person Harry talks about anyway. You're still ... Malfoy. That bloke in school who I thought I was rid of." He winced.
Draco thought about that. Did he still think that about Ron? Or the rest of the Weasleys? He wasn't sure about Ron. But he was very sure about Mr and Mrs Weasley .... "I hated your family on principal," he said quietly, "and I suppose, that, too, was mutual. I will say now that I have come to respect your parents."
Ron looked up in surprise at that. "What?"
"They are survivors. They fight for what they believe in, and they love their family regardless of what happens," Draco said thoughtfully, fingers idly caressing his belly again. "Those are things that matter to me, especially now."
The expression on Ron's face was still one of surprise and he didn't seem to know what to say for a few moments. "This is what I'm talking about," Ron said quietly. "The bloke I remember would never have said that."
"Not to Ronald Weasley, he wouldn't have," Draco smirked. "Not to the boy who insulted his name before he even had a chance to speak to him. I know, I replied with worse. It was ... well, it was all I knew. And I suppose I was angry at you when I saw you with Potter."
Ron frowned confusedly at that. "Angry with me? Harry and I are best mates."
"On the train, that first year," Draco said. "You had just met him." He cocked his head, thinking about it again. "I would guess that Harry never told you he met me first."
"Well ..." said Ron, seemingly thinking about it. "After we saw you and Crabbe and Goyle, he told me he had met you before."
Draco smiled a bit at that. It was strange that even a small acknowledgement from so long ago still moved him. He was so lost in his memories that for a minute or two he forgot the other man was there. That happened a lot these days. His mind seemed to wander through the past a lot.
Ron sat waiting, watching Draco strangely. "What does who met him first have to do with anything, anyway? I never had a ... crush on him," he said finally, making a face.
"Yes, but I did," Draco said, looking back at Ron now.
"Well, obviously," Ron said oddly. "You weren't very good about it though. Seemed like you had it out for him, but not because of a crush."
"Yes, complete prat, I know," Draco said, smirking.
Ron continued to look at Draco strangely. "Well," he said, "that's who I think of still. That prat. And I ... can't understand for the life of me how you managed to get Harry to be with you. I mean, he never even liked blokes before, and he was with my sister."
Draco's smirk grew into a smile that lit up his face. "I wasn't actually trying to seduce him then," he said. "I just ... we just became friends."
Ron made another face at the word seduce. "That's another thing that didn't make sense," he said. "After all those things that happened in school, after everything, he wanted to be over at your place all the time. It was ... weird. I mean, don't you think? Can't you see where I'm coming from here?"
Draco chuckled at that. "Ronald Weasley, are you suggesting I used a love potion or something?"
Ron rolled his eyes and his lips actually formed a small smile. "That might make more sense," he said. "But no."
"Never did that, or even seriously considered it," Draco said, nodding. "It wouldn't mean anything to me if it wasn't real. As to how Harry Potter could actually fall in love with the likes of me, I guess that is a question you should ask him. It is a mystery to me as well."
Ron snorted, shaking his head. "I have asked him," he said. "He just says you’re different. Well, that and a whole lot of other sappy crap that I don't care to repeat." He shook his head again, looking amused and ill at the same time.
The blond laughed in delight. "He is a romantic," he said, voice full of affection.
"Yeah, I guess," Ron said, still with the same face. "And ... I suppose I can tell he really does love you. I've been ... feeling bad for hurting his feelings since I actually did hurt them. I don't want me and Harry to be that way. I already know I couldn't stop being his friend, even if I tried."
Draco knew something himself about not being able to stop his feelings for Harry. He nodded. "That's good," he said softly. "Because he does need you."
Ron smiled a little and looked down again. "Yeah, that's ... that's what Hermione said."
Draco's face was serious again. "It's also why, even when I still didn't like you, I never tried to come between you. Not because I am so noble, we both know I would have if I'd thought it was a good idea. But Harry needs friends like a plant needs sunlight. And I need Harry."
Ron gave a few small, slow nods, his face serious too, and thoughtful. "And I suppose that's why I came," he said. "I think I know he would pick you over me now, and, well, I can't blame him for that since he loves you. But I don't want him to feel like he has to choose. He thought for a long time that was how it was. All that time he didn't come around, back when everyone first found out about you."
"He may need you even more soon," Draco said.
Ron looked at Draco and frowned questioningly.
"I have told Harry that I know I can do this, but he, thankfully, never asks what that means," Draco said, now meeting Ron's eyes. "It means that I know I can give birth to two healthy sons. He thinks that means that I think I will be all right as well."
Ron's brows lowered further over his eyes. "You don't think you'll be all right?"
"No, and if you tell him, it will only worry him," Draco responded.
"But ..." Ron said. "He would .... If you ... died he would ... Merlin."
"Exactly. But he will have the boys, you, Hermione, your family and mine," Draco said. "And he is stronger than he realises."
Ron shook his head. "You can't die," he said. "Harry would be .... He would go mad."
"He faced Voldemort. He walked to his own death to save everyone else," Draco said, fingers twisting in the blanket across his body. "He is strong. And he will need to be there for Corvus and Caelum. He knows that."
"How can you not tell him?" Ron asked. "He thinks you're going to be fine."
Draco looked away, unable to let Weasley see how much this upset him. "Because he would want to do something about it. And there is nothing to be done. The only other option is kill our own children. He can't live with that and neither can I."
Ron was silent for a long moment. "I won't tell him," he said quietly, frowning. "But not because I think he shouldn't know."
"Good," Draco said quietly, some of the tension in him easing. "I only told you so that you could help him, after."
Ron shook his head again. "I'll be there if he needs me."
Draco sighed, looking back now. "I'm counting on it."
Chapter Title: A Pact
Words: 2095 Words
Draco was propped up in bed with a tray beside him. It no longer fit in his lap, so it was awkward to use as a writing surface. He finally left the ink on the tray but placed a book under the parchment and balanced it on his belly to write. He went through several sheets of parchment before he finally got one he was willing to send. He didn’t know if this would be the last letter his father would ever get from him and he wanted it to be a comfort to him, if needed.
Dear Father,
Your letter cheered me more than you can know. I have missed you and thought about you often. I wish there were a way I could come to visit you. Mother is correct. I am ill and currently confined to my bed until I improve. You may be assured that Mother has found an excellent Healer to tend me and I am doing my best to take care of myself.
Before I became too ill to work in the lab, I had actually developed several new potions. I have explained one of them to the Healer who has my care and she has been very impressed. There is every possibility that this line of research might lead to some real breakthroughs in the future.
It has been a busy year, as you no doubt know. Aside from my health issues, I am very happy with my life. We live at the old Black house and I have my own lab. Harry is in Auror training and I see Mother often.
I have recovered from the incident of last February and am doing what I can to leave it in the past. Harry has been supportive in every way. Even if you don’t approve of him personally, you would no doubt be satisfied with his treatment of me.
I love you. I don’t know how often I have said it. It certainly hasn’t been enough. While it is obvious that there are several areas where we disagree, I want you to know that I have always admired and respected you. And that I have always been, and still am, proud to be your son.
Draco
***
It was not very late in the day. Harry had only left a few hours earlier, and Draco was propped on pillows on the couch, a book open against his belly. It was one day that his mother actually wasn't coming over. She was, of all things, having Andromeda and Teddy to the Manor, so it was quiet in the house with only Kreacher there.
Right then, as if on cue, Kreacher popped into place beside the couch. "Someone be here, Master," he said.
"Who?" Draco asked, frowning.
"The blood traitor," Kreacher answered.
"Which blood traitor?" Draco asked, part irritated and part amused.
Kreacher cocked his head slowly to the side as if thinking for a moment. "Weasley," he said finally, seeming pleased with himself for remembering.
"Which Weasley? Oh, never mind, have whoever it is come in," Draco said, huffing.
Kreacher nodded, popping away again, and within a few short moments, someone knocked on the door frame of the sitting room. It was Ron.
Draco's eyes widened. "Is Harry okay?" he asked, worried at the man's sudden appearance.
"Oh," said Ron. "Yeah. Yeah, he's okay. I actually haven't even seen him today." He shifted where he stood, clearly feeling awkward.
The blond arched an eyebrow and waited, wondering what Ronald Weasley could be doing there when the man knew Harry wasn't home.
"Er ..." said Ron, seemingly forcing himself to meet Draco's eyes. "Can I sit down?"
Draco gestured to a nearby chair. "Certainly," he said. "Do you want tea?"
"I ... guess that would be fine," said Ron, sitting in the indicated chair.
Draco called Kreacher and had him bring tea for the two of them.
Ron busied himself with making his cup, while Kreacher prepared Draco's for him automatically. Once it was clear Ron could take no more time getting sugar, he sat back with his cup, looking like he didn't know where to start.
Draco arched an eyebrow again, but said nothing. He was in no hurry and it was amusing to watch Ron squirm.
Ron sighed quietly, pursing his lips for a moment before opening his mouth. "I ... know you don't like me," he said.
Draco tilted his head. "I was under the impression that it was mutual," he said softly.
Ron frowned and looked down at his tea. "Well, I – I guess it is," he said. "But ..." his ears turned red, "I suppose that doesn't mean I can't be ... sorry. I know I ... hurt Harry's feelings back when you two told us about the babies."
"No father wants to hear someone question the paternity of his children," Draco responded.
Ron sighed again. "I know," he said. "It just, well ... it can get hard sometimes – to hold back, I mean. I suppose I still don't really know you, or, well, the person Harry talks about anyway. You're still ... Malfoy. That bloke in school who I thought I was rid of." He winced.
Draco thought about that. Did he still think that about Ron? Or the rest of the Weasleys? He wasn't sure about Ron. But he was very sure about Mr and Mrs Weasley .... "I hated your family on principal," he said quietly, "and I suppose, that, too, was mutual. I will say now that I have come to respect your parents."
Ron looked up in surprise at that. "What?"
"They are survivors. They fight for what they believe in, and they love their family regardless of what happens," Draco said thoughtfully, fingers idly caressing his belly again. "Those are things that matter to me, especially now."
The expression on Ron's face was still one of surprise and he didn't seem to know what to say for a few moments. "This is what I'm talking about," Ron said quietly. "The bloke I remember would never have said that."
"Not to Ronald Weasley, he wouldn't have," Draco smirked. "Not to the boy who insulted his name before he even had a chance to speak to him. I know, I replied with worse. It was ... well, it was all I knew. And I suppose I was angry at you when I saw you with Potter."
Ron frowned confusedly at that. "Angry with me? Harry and I are best mates."
"On the train, that first year," Draco said. "You had just met him." He cocked his head, thinking about it again. "I would guess that Harry never told you he met me first."
"Well ..." said Ron, seemingly thinking about it. "After we saw you and Crabbe and Goyle, he told me he had met you before."
Draco smiled a bit at that. It was strange that even a small acknowledgement from so long ago still moved him. He was so lost in his memories that for a minute or two he forgot the other man was there. That happened a lot these days. His mind seemed to wander through the past a lot.
Ron sat waiting, watching Draco strangely. "What does who met him first have to do with anything, anyway? I never had a ... crush on him," he said finally, making a face.
"Yes, but I did," Draco said, looking back at Ron now.
"Well, obviously," Ron said oddly. "You weren't very good about it though. Seemed like you had it out for him, but not because of a crush."
"Yes, complete prat, I know," Draco said, smirking.
Ron continued to look at Draco strangely. "Well," he said, "that's who I think of still. That prat. And I ... can't understand for the life of me how you managed to get Harry to be with you. I mean, he never even liked blokes before, and he was with my sister."
Draco's smirk grew into a smile that lit up his face. "I wasn't actually trying to seduce him then," he said. "I just ... we just became friends."
Ron made another face at the word seduce. "That's another thing that didn't make sense," he said. "After all those things that happened in school, after everything, he wanted to be over at your place all the time. It was ... weird. I mean, don't you think? Can't you see where I'm coming from here?"
Draco chuckled at that. "Ronald Weasley, are you suggesting I used a love potion or something?"
Ron rolled his eyes and his lips actually formed a small smile. "That might make more sense," he said. "But no."
"Never did that, or even seriously considered it," Draco said, nodding. "It wouldn't mean anything to me if it wasn't real. As to how Harry Potter could actually fall in love with the likes of me, I guess that is a question you should ask him. It is a mystery to me as well."
Ron snorted, shaking his head. "I have asked him," he said. "He just says you’re different. Well, that and a whole lot of other sappy crap that I don't care to repeat." He shook his head again, looking amused and ill at the same time.
The blond laughed in delight. "He is a romantic," he said, voice full of affection.
"Yeah, I guess," Ron said, still with the same face. "And ... I suppose I can tell he really does love you. I've been ... feeling bad for hurting his feelings since I actually did hurt them. I don't want me and Harry to be that way. I already know I couldn't stop being his friend, even if I tried."
Draco knew something himself about not being able to stop his feelings for Harry. He nodded. "That's good," he said softly. "Because he does need you."
Ron smiled a little and looked down again. "Yeah, that's ... that's what Hermione said."
Draco's face was serious again. "It's also why, even when I still didn't like you, I never tried to come between you. Not because I am so noble, we both know I would have if I'd thought it was a good idea. But Harry needs friends like a plant needs sunlight. And I need Harry."
Ron gave a few small, slow nods, his face serious too, and thoughtful. "And I suppose that's why I came," he said. "I think I know he would pick you over me now, and, well, I can't blame him for that since he loves you. But I don't want him to feel like he has to choose. He thought for a long time that was how it was. All that time he didn't come around, back when everyone first found out about you."
"He may need you even more soon," Draco said.
Ron looked at Draco and frowned questioningly.
"I have told Harry that I know I can do this, but he, thankfully, never asks what that means," Draco said, now meeting Ron's eyes. "It means that I know I can give birth to two healthy sons. He thinks that means that I think I will be all right as well."
Ron's brows lowered further over his eyes. "You don't think you'll be all right?"
"No, and if you tell him, it will only worry him," Draco responded.
"But ..." Ron said. "He would .... If you ... died he would ... Merlin."
"Exactly. But he will have the boys, you, Hermione, your family and mine," Draco said. "And he is stronger than he realises."
Ron shook his head. "You can't die," he said. "Harry would be .... He would go mad."
"He faced Voldemort. He walked to his own death to save everyone else," Draco said, fingers twisting in the blanket across his body. "He is strong. And he will need to be there for Corvus and Caelum. He knows that."
"How can you not tell him?" Ron asked. "He thinks you're going to be fine."
Draco looked away, unable to let Weasley see how much this upset him. "Because he would want to do something about it. And there is nothing to be done. The only other option is kill our own children. He can't live with that and neither can I."
Ron was silent for a long moment. "I won't tell him," he said quietly, frowning. "But not because I think he shouldn't know."
"Good," Draco said quietly, some of the tension in him easing. "I only told you so that you could help him, after."
Ron shook his head again. "I'll be there if he needs me."
Draco sighed, looking back now. "I'm counting on it."