Doll Parts
folder
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
30
Views:
3,475
Reviews:
7
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
30
Views:
3,475
Reviews:
7
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
August 3, 1998
Journal of Draco Malfoy
August 3, 1998
Severus is dead. He left me everything, but what do I need of his things? I need him. Not that it matters much now. The final battle has been fought and won. All of the marked Death Eaters are skittering away, the marks on their arms now glowing due to some manner of magic Dumbledore sorted out. They\'re being rounded up and sent to Azkaban. Provided they didn\'t die on the battlefield.
Severus\' letter certifying his death came with an Order of Merlin, Third Class. He didn\'t die in battle, but evidently he was a spy. Words cannot express my feelings about that. He never trusted me enough to tell me that, although he could have. It\'s not as if I wanted to join in the battle either way. Particularly since I moved here. Then again, he barely made an attempt to know me. How could I have ever gotten to know him? It just makes me feel miserable.
And betrayed.
Looking back on our conversations, it explains why he kept calling me ignorant. Still, he could\'ve taken the time to explain it to me. Instead he just... he didn\'t even bother. A trophy. That\'s all I truly was, and he said as much to my face. Maybe I am dim. Maybe I should\'ve seen this. Maybe it\'s just all my guilt trying to make me feel like I loved him more than I did.
Severus died fighting my father. Fighting over me. Whatever else he did to me, Severus defended me to him, told him that I was not ready for the Death Eaters nor would I ever be. He refused to divulge my location and set up a Fidelius charm on his house so that I would never be found should something happen to him. My father killed him and apparently came looking. He is still at large, but that won\'t likely last long.
As for me, I don\'t think I wish to keep this journal anymore. I started it to chronicle my interactions with Severus, and now that he\'s gone... I don\'t see the point anymore. I\'m going to sell this house. I\'ve been wandering around it for a couple of weeks since I found out; partially in fear that my father was waiting outside and partially because I just didn\'t know what else to do. But it\'s time to move on. The Daily Prophet is back in regular circulation and the rest of the Wizarding world seems to have pretty well buried their dead and gotten on with it. I\'ll leave some flowers at Severus\' grave and then move on with the next chapter of my life.
I\'m going to move back into the Manor. The Ministry has rigged the perimeter with all sorts of wards. They were rather excited about adding live bait to their trap. Other than here, it\'s probably the safest place I could be. I can\'t stand being here anymore, though. Too many figurative ghosts.
The Manor really is too big for one person, but then it was too much for three. After that... I don\'t know. I have much to think about. Fortunately, I have plenty of time. Father never let me pursue art like I wanted to. Perhaps I\'ll take up painting. Maybe opening a gallery would be amusing. After so much horror, people might be interested in adding a bit of beauty to their homes.
Now that I\'m getting the paper again, I see an announcement for the Potter-Lovegood wedding listed. I wonder if Queerhead still has the scar. Perhaps I\'ll show up and flirt with the groom. I know that robe lifter still wants me. Then again, thinking of Lovegood as his lifetime beard amuses me. We shall see.
__
Notes:
Thanks so much to poor, sweet Cravache who got to deal with my extreme meltdowniness when the computer died and I thought this should all be deleted and.... Well, all of the rest of it. Your support as well as your tough edits makes my work much better and I learn so much. Now, if I could just learn not to flip out when the computer dies...
Also thanks to De and Araythea for making edits. Making me icons and stroking my ego as well as reading through and checking for errors. It truly means a lot.
Thanks to Ang and Remipunx for reading it!
This was a strange way to tell a story. I wasn\'t sure it would work. It was a tough balance between what was actually going on, what Draco thought was going on, and what he\'d admit, even to himself. Somewhere along the line I decided he wouldn\'t use slang, cut back his language and had very dubious thoughts on what kind of conversation he and his father would\'ve had about sex.
It\'s probably tough for some to see Draco as this much of a victim. It happens to the best of us. That\'s likely my biggest love/hate with this.
The future? Let\'s say that he gets his Gallery, names it the Draco Malfoy Gallery of Art, because he\'s so subtle like that. And I bet he\'s even right about that robe lifter. Or perhaps he found his way to Dean. Or he realized in the end that he was straight and married... :)
August 3, 1998
Severus is dead. He left me everything, but what do I need of his things? I need him. Not that it matters much now. The final battle has been fought and won. All of the marked Death Eaters are skittering away, the marks on their arms now glowing due to some manner of magic Dumbledore sorted out. They\'re being rounded up and sent to Azkaban. Provided they didn\'t die on the battlefield.
Severus\' letter certifying his death came with an Order of Merlin, Third Class. He didn\'t die in battle, but evidently he was a spy. Words cannot express my feelings about that. He never trusted me enough to tell me that, although he could have. It\'s not as if I wanted to join in the battle either way. Particularly since I moved here. Then again, he barely made an attempt to know me. How could I have ever gotten to know him? It just makes me feel miserable.
And betrayed.
Looking back on our conversations, it explains why he kept calling me ignorant. Still, he could\'ve taken the time to explain it to me. Instead he just... he didn\'t even bother. A trophy. That\'s all I truly was, and he said as much to my face. Maybe I am dim. Maybe I should\'ve seen this. Maybe it\'s just all my guilt trying to make me feel like I loved him more than I did.
Severus died fighting my father. Fighting over me. Whatever else he did to me, Severus defended me to him, told him that I was not ready for the Death Eaters nor would I ever be. He refused to divulge my location and set up a Fidelius charm on his house so that I would never be found should something happen to him. My father killed him and apparently came looking. He is still at large, but that won\'t likely last long.
As for me, I don\'t think I wish to keep this journal anymore. I started it to chronicle my interactions with Severus, and now that he\'s gone... I don\'t see the point anymore. I\'m going to sell this house. I\'ve been wandering around it for a couple of weeks since I found out; partially in fear that my father was waiting outside and partially because I just didn\'t know what else to do. But it\'s time to move on. The Daily Prophet is back in regular circulation and the rest of the Wizarding world seems to have pretty well buried their dead and gotten on with it. I\'ll leave some flowers at Severus\' grave and then move on with the next chapter of my life.
I\'m going to move back into the Manor. The Ministry has rigged the perimeter with all sorts of wards. They were rather excited about adding live bait to their trap. Other than here, it\'s probably the safest place I could be. I can\'t stand being here anymore, though. Too many figurative ghosts.
The Manor really is too big for one person, but then it was too much for three. After that... I don\'t know. I have much to think about. Fortunately, I have plenty of time. Father never let me pursue art like I wanted to. Perhaps I\'ll take up painting. Maybe opening a gallery would be amusing. After so much horror, people might be interested in adding a bit of beauty to their homes.
Now that I\'m getting the paper again, I see an announcement for the Potter-Lovegood wedding listed. I wonder if Queerhead still has the scar. Perhaps I\'ll show up and flirt with the groom. I know that robe lifter still wants me. Then again, thinking of Lovegood as his lifetime beard amuses me. We shall see.
__
Notes:
Thanks so much to poor, sweet Cravache who got to deal with my extreme meltdowniness when the computer died and I thought this should all be deleted and.... Well, all of the rest of it. Your support as well as your tough edits makes my work much better and I learn so much. Now, if I could just learn not to flip out when the computer dies...
Also thanks to De and Araythea for making edits. Making me icons and stroking my ego as well as reading through and checking for errors. It truly means a lot.
Thanks to Ang and Remipunx for reading it!
This was a strange way to tell a story. I wasn\'t sure it would work. It was a tough balance between what was actually going on, what Draco thought was going on, and what he\'d admit, even to himself. Somewhere along the line I decided he wouldn\'t use slang, cut back his language and had very dubious thoughts on what kind of conversation he and his father would\'ve had about sex.
It\'s probably tough for some to see Draco as this much of a victim. It happens to the best of us. That\'s likely my biggest love/hate with this.
The future? Let\'s say that he gets his Gallery, names it the Draco Malfoy Gallery of Art, because he\'s so subtle like that. And I bet he\'s even right about that robe lifter. Or perhaps he found his way to Dean. Or he realized in the end that he was straight and married... :)