The Unexpected Side Effect of Draught No. 9

Chapter 3: Evochi

Severus didn’t waste any time jumping into the full explanation.

“The true power of Evochi is in its ability to provide experiences that reflect one’s deepest desires. It may be something large or small, mundane or adventurous. It is your choice.”

Harry felt as apprehensive of the notion as he was mesmerized by it. He still didn’t know what it had to do with his need to escape, and found himself looking at Severus, searching those black eyes for answers. After a few moments, though, he looked away, his mind once again returning to its conflicted thoughts.

“Harry, you are not like most people. Scarcely have you experienced what it means to have a normal life, doing the things your peers enjoy and take for granted. For the better part of a decade you carried a burden far heavier than anyone of your age should’ve been asked to do, yet you did it with such sense of purpose, such tenacity and conviction, that never once did I see you attempt to shirk that responsibility. I am not sure I would have been able to do all that, if the situation were reversed.”

Harry looked up at him then, struck with awe at his admission.

“Evochi is total escapism. Some might say avoidance, but I rather find it to have a healing effect. The mind accepts these new virtual realities, and whatever you do within them, as real experiences – as though they actually happened. These experiences can even replace less desirable things. For short periods of time, you are able to experience whatever life you want.”

Suddenly, it clicked, and Harry understood what Severus was offering him. And why. Harry felt his heart skip a beat at Severus’ uncanny ability to always know what he was thinking. While it was true Harry was pitiful at Occluding Severus, he thought he would have at least known if his thoughts were being invaded. Yet he felt nothing of the sort. Harry set the trousers he had been holding aside and turned his body towards Severus.

“So if I do this, come back to Hogwarts with you, and start taking this potion… it will… help me?” Harry would have felt ridiculous adding ‘with my nightmares and sense of isolation’ so he opted to leave that off.

“That is my hope, yes.”

“How long can I take it?”

“No more than once a week. And for what duration, I do not know. I will have to monitor you. But I should think that six months will be sufficient for you to see improvement.”

“So the potion isn’t dangerous?” Harry was weighing all his options.

“Not in the way you are asking, no, but there are dangers with it, like all transformative substances. One is psychological and the other is physical. The psychological risk is in addiction to the substance, not entirely unlike what happens to those who put too much stock in what they see in the Mirror of Erised. Do you remember it?”

Harry nodded fervently. He had, and also remembered Dumbledore’s warnings about it too, which Severus just echoed.

“People have driven themselves mad by that mirror, and have done so too with Evochi. Although it is very difficult to get your hands on either, both are dangerous when the person does not truly understand their purpose. Or their power.”

Harry shuddered lightly.

“The physical risk is the most important, though, so this I need you to hear.”

Harry wasn’t sure he liked the tone Severus had affected.

“Evochi works by subduing your conscious mind in favor of your subconscious. It is from there the virtual reality emerges, created by your own impulses. Since the mind interprets that new reality to be as real as anything you experience while in a conscious state, it is… theoretically possible to cause damage to yourself physically.”

Harry swallowed hard. “You mean if I fall off a cliff or something in a virtual reality, I could… I could die here even though I may just be sitting on a chair in your office?”

Severus waited for a moment and nodded solemnly. “Yes.”

Harry felt his heart jump and it raced wildly in his chest. He didn’t think anything could top the panic he’d felt at walking into the forest towards what he was sure was his imminent death, but the idea that a potion could take his life in such an innocuous and powerless manner was somehow far more frightening.

“Why? I mean, I don’t get—” He knew he was stammering but couldn’t make sense of it. Perhaps on some level, he didn’t want to make sense of it.

“The mind is very powerful, Harry.”

Harry looked up into Severus’ eyes, the weight behind them significant, and let those words settle over him. Slowly, his mind seemed to grasp the full implication and truth of it all.

Severus returned the gaze. “Very powerful.”