Salvation

Okay, just to answer a few questions, yes, I know I have uploaded this before, but it got taken down and I recieved several emails asking me where it was. And, yes, I do know that these chapters have been posted before, but I am uploading new ones very soon. And, yes, i do know that the chapters are very long, but believe me these are the broken up ones, they were longer.

Anyways, here is chapter three. Hope you like it.

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Bill cracked his eyes open to find himself encased in warm arms. They were thick and muscular, definitely not Solarin. He looked around to see that everyone in the kitchen was wearing pastel pink, their clothes colours transfigured. He was entwined with Charlie, his hand on his brothers arse. He looked around to find that everyone in the kitchen, with the exception of Draco, was entwined with someone in very intimate positions. He looked around to find Solarin was the only other one awake, and he smirked. Yeah right, no way had she lost her prankster streak. She was perched in the open window, smoking a cigarette and staring out into the day. The sky was a bright blue but there were dark threatening clouds on the horizon, promising further rains. He sniggered. She had changed their hair colours as well, to a bright luminous green and red streaked pattern.

“I would have a go at you for this but it is our own fault. We fell asleep,” Bill grumbled quietly, freeing himself and moving over to the window, changing himself back on the way. He climbed up on the sink and settled himself with her, pulling her back into his arms.

“You been up all night?” he asked his grinning girlfriend.

“I didn’t feel like dropping my barriers while I slept and letting Harry’s pain in. I stayed up. I got bored,” she replied, her smile wide as he nuzzled her neck.

Bill glanced at his parents, finding them asleep. “Give me a puff.”

She took a drag and then joined their lips, transferring smoke from her lungs to his. She had first taught him to do this in Hogwarts. She had been sixteen and had a friend in Diagon Alley that sent them to her. They had been sitting by the lake, secluded by a willow tree and she had taught him the finer art of teenage delinquency.

“When did it go quiet?” he asked, feeling his head spin deliciously.

“Quarter to five. It’s been quiet for about half an hour now. Remus and Sirius are making their way down the stairs,” she replied. “They’ll be a while, they’re knackered.”

“So, do you think that we’ll ever get round to having one?”

“One what, a sleepless night helping someone have a baby?”

“No, a baby of our own! Do you ever think about us reproducing?” Bill asked, taking another puff.

“After those screams, you think I’m ever letting you touch me again? One of them should have remembered silencing charms. Poor Hermione looked ready to pass out. Those screams are like the best contraceptive in the world.” Solarin said, running her hand suggestively along his thigh. He found it reassuring. “I’m kidding. I think about it sometimes. But I don’t think we’re ready for the responsibility yet.”

“Harry’s only sixteen,” Bill argued.

She tilted round to look him in the eye. “Are you saying you want a baby?”

“No, I’m just saying that age isn’t really a factor for us, it never has been. I just wondered if you ever thought about having one,” he explained as she flicked the cigarette butt out of the window.

“Well, in that case, yes, I do think about us having one. I’m talking in like a few years, not now, but yeah, I do think about it. I want children with you. But I’m telling you now, I am so not giving you seven kids like your mum and dad,” she said, settling herself against his chest again.

“I wouldn’t want that many,” he said honestly. She reached up and back, playing with his long hair, his fingertips dancing across her exposed ribs. “When I was growing up, because there were so many of us, my parents never really had time for us all. We knew that they loved us but it was tough. I don’t want our child to go through that.”

“But I don’t want our child to be an only child. I value having a brother,” Solarin replied. “Without him, I wouldn’t have made it to double digits, let alone adulthood.” Bill kissed her neck. It was the closest she had ever come to telling him of her childhood. She had closed the connection and Bill suspected that she was thinking of her own parents. “How about we say two at the least, four at the most?”

“Sounds good to me,” he agreed as Remus and Sirius entered the room, laughing at the sleeping people. They awoke and looked around, some glaring at Solarin and Bill, most laughing and changing themselves back.

“So?” Draco asked.

“It’s all over. Harry had a beautiful baby girl at four forty four this morning,” Remus announced.

The room was silent.

“A girl?” Hermione asked. “He had a girl?”

“Yes, and beautiful she is too. Three pounds, four ounces.”

“How is she a girl?” Ron asked.

“Because she’s special,” Solarin intervened. “Why do you think I turned all your clothes pink?”

“You knew?” Sirius asked.

“As soon as she left Harry’s body I knew. His magic stopped interfering with my magic. That is one happy little girl. And she adores Severus already. She’s very tired and understands that her carrier is tired and will feed her later,” Solarin revealed, Sirius and Remus nodding at her, permanent smiles fixed on their faces.

“So, tell us of her,” Albus encouraged while the rest of the room processed the information.

“Well, she is absolutely tiny, you can literally sit her in the palm of your hand,” Sirius gushed. “Ten fingers, ten toes. Black hair, all soft curls. And we think her eyes will turn green, they’re already a little blue-green. She’s pale and so cute.”

“Hey, this means that Luna is the only one who won anything,” Fred said with a bemused smile. “She was the only one who bet that the baby would be a girl. Everyone else said ‘he’ or ‘him’. Luna wins.”

They paid up and Luna became a very rich witch, though her smile was oddly calm in the face of so much gold.

“How did you know, Luna?” Neville asked the blonde Ravenclaw.

“It’s Harry. If it is unlikely, unfortunate or impossible, it will happen to him,” she said dreamily.

They all smiled and began talking about the baby, Molly making them something to eat and Arthur popping open a few bottles of champagne. Solarin declined the beverage, sipping orange juice with Hermione, claiming that ingesting alcohol made her control slip. Sirius shuddered as she said it.

Everyone found that they were immensely relieved that it was all over.

“Hey Draco, you’re a big brother now,” Charlie reminded the blonde.

“I don’t think Harry wants to acknowledge the Malfoy input in his daughter,” Draco said sadly, reminding them all of how Harry had screamed of what a bastard Lucius was.

“You’re Severus’ godson, right?” Charlie asked, Draco nodding. “Well, she’s Severus’ daughter. You’re her god big brother.”

Draco beamed at him and held one end of Charlie’s napkin, swinging it between them.

The morning passed in a haze of toasts and celebrations, all of them charging their glasses and toasting Harry and Severus’ daughter finally making an appearance.

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Severus woke to Solarin running her hand over his hair.

“Severus, you need to wake up,” she said softly.

“Why? What time is it?” he asked, yawning, disentangling himself from Harry and sitting up.

“It’s a little after one in the afternoon and the baby is whimpering. I think she’s hungry.”

Severus yawned and slipped into the t-shirt and sweatpants she handed him before picking up the tiny girl. She looked up at him with big unfocussed eyes, falling silent.

“Do you want to hold her?” he asked, watching her face light up. She held her arms out and he helped her hold the minuscule girl, the augur cooing at her how beautiful she was. Solarin continued to talk to her and play with her teeny reaching hands as Severus padded to the bathroom to relieve his overfull bladder. He returned and sat down next to Harry.

He ran gentle fingers through the sleep tousled hair and green eyes opened.

“Hi,” Harry mumbled.

“Welcome back,” Severus replied with a smile.

“What happened?” Harry asked, wincing as he shifted in the bed.

“Well, you did beautifully delivering a perfect baby girl and then you went to sleep, just like I promised. We cleaned you and the room up and put you to bed.”

“So I didn’t dream it? I really had a girl?”

“You really had a girl.”

“What time is it?”

“A little after one pm.”

“Why are you waking me?”

“You need to take some potions and eat something. You need to try and feed the baby as well, love,” Severus replied and smiled as Harry nodded. He helped Harry sit up.

“I thought you promised to heal me if I tore?” Harry asked, his face a mask of pain.

“I did heal you,” Severus replied.

“Then why does it still hurt so much down there?”

“Harry, you’ve just passed a baby through it. It’s bound to be sore. I promise it will get better.”

“Severus, I need the bathroom. I’m not sure my legs will get me there,” Harry said quietly, blushing slightly.

“It’s all right, I’ll help you,” Severus agreed, rubbing his hand comfortingly along the slim back.

“Where’s the baby?” Harry asked as Severus eased him from the warm bedding.

“Solarin is holding her,” Severus said, motioning to his sister as he helped Harry stand. She smiled at Harry and he smiled back, staring at the bundle in her arms. It wasn’t much of a smile, Severus noticed, as if his lover was just doing it for show. If Solarin noticed, she said nothing, fussing at the baby once more.

Severus half carried Harry to the bathroom, his shaky legs making it difficult for him to even stand, and Harry proclaimed that it was only true love that would allow him to have Severus help him on the toilet. Severus smiled at him and kept telling him how proud he was of him, how much he loved him as he helped Harry change the blood soaked pad between his legs.

He guided Harry back to bed and helped him prop himself up on a mountain of pillows. Harry began to cry as Solarin moved forwards to hand him the baby. Severus gathered him into his arms and shook his head at Solarin. She moved to rock with the child, standing by the window.

“What’s wrong, Harry? Tell me, love,” Severus said as he held him through his tears.

“What if she knows?” Harry said.

“What if who knows what?”

“The baby. What if she knows I didn’t want her in the beginning? What if she knows I hated her when he told me about her? That I hated her because she was the reason he did that to me? What if she knows that I was expecting her to be a boy?” Harry whimpered.

Severus forced Harry to look at him and wiped away his tears.

“Harry, do you love her now she’s here? Do you want her?” Severus asked.

“I…I don’t know.” Harry seemed to collapse in on himself as sobs wracked his thin frame. Severus was struck dumb as he let Harry try and burrow into his chest, stroking his hair absentmindedly as he and Solarin looked at each other in shock. He had thought that Harry would adore the baby once it arrived. But this sudden uncertainty had him dazed and troubled. Was Harry just uncertain of this new situation? Was it just his hormones fluctuating again? Or was it more, would it end up as Harry rejecting the child? Solarin was watching the scene, trying to calm the now wailing baby. Harry was falling apart, his dreams were shattering and their child was screaming in hunger. He couldn’t deal with them all at once. He put his own fear of losing his dream to the side, there was nothing he could do about it.

Severus was torn between which problem to address first, Harry, or the baby. He decided that the baby needed feeding more than anything else, and he wasn’t quite sure what to say to his lover to help.

“Harry, listen to me,” Severus urged. “The baby needs feeding. I want you to try feeding her.”

“No, I don’t want to,” Harry refused, shaking his head.

“Harry, it’s all right for you to feel uncertain of whether you want her or not. After all that has happened, I’m not surprised you feel conflicted. But right now, it doesn’t matter if you want her or not, there is time for you to make up your mind. If you feed her it might help you decide,” Severus offered, watching Harry shake his head as he curled against his chest.

“I don’t want to try, I don’t want to hold her.”

Severus had absolutely no idea what to do. In their whole relationship, from the moment he rescued Harry, the Gryffindor had never refused to do anything he had told him to do. He had no idea what to say, how to make this better. He briefly considered using the modes of persuasion he used as a teacher: intimidation and fear. But Harry had never responded well to Scary Professor Snape, as he had dubbed it.

He had no clue on how to handle this, so he did the one thing he had always done when he was this unsure: he looked to his sister to guide him. She motioned him over and passed him the baby. She went to Harry and took Severus’ place.

“Harry, look at me,” Solarin said, holding him by the shoulders. His crying had slowed but he was still shaking with the force of it. He wouldn’t look at her, he just continued to gaze down at the patterned comforter. “Harry James Potter-Snape, you will look at me when I am speaking to you!” she ordered.

Harry looked up in surprise of her tone, his crying halted by the shock of it. Her tone had been angry, harsh and unforgiving. He had never thought that she could sound so much like Scary Professor Snape in all his wildest imaginings. Her tone had been frosty but her eyes were warm and reassuring. Severus was watching them, the screaming baby in his arms.

“Harry, I’m sorry to have used that voice with you but I need you to listen. We will let you have your uncertainty, we will not pressure you into making a decision. But you must feed her. We have no other way of doing it. You have to feed her, there is no other way,” Solarin explained. “Once you have fed her, I will take her to Molly and we will care for her while you decide if that is what you want. But you must feed her.”

Harry looked from her unwavering gaze to Severus’. He felt his stomach twist at the thought of actually holding her, of doing anything for her. But he knew that she needed him to do this, if nothing else. They had neither purchased nor prepared any bottles, and baby formula could not be conjured by magic. They hadn’t even purchased a breast pump. Once his milk had come in they had all agreed that him breast feeding was the best way forward, Harry included. It could not be given any other way than from him directly. Her shrieks were piercing, she sounded in real pain.

Harry considered it. She had let him be for hours, the least he could do was to feed her, if only as a thank you for the few hours she had allowed him to sleep.

“Fine, I’ll feed her,” Harry croaked, his voice hoarse from crying.

Solarin nodded and gave up her position on the bed. Harry started to move away when Severus brought the child to him but the pain in his body and his own self reasoning made him stop. He kept his eyes fixed on Severus’ face as the child was placed in his arms. He couldn’t look at her for fear of what he might see. He found himself feeling incredibly foolish. How foolish was it that he couldn’t even look at his own child?

His top was unbuttoned, his left breast released from the nursing bra and still he kept his eyes fixed on Severus. The man looked worried. His arms were manipulated and his husband’s hand gentle as he touched his chest. There was a sudden silence as she latched on. He looked at Solarin. She looked worried as well, though not as much as his lover, and he found himself hoping she wasn’t glancing his mind.

“What hurts?” Severus asked him as he winced.

“Inside me. It feels like cramps,” Harry answered, barely above a whisper.

“They are cramps. Nursing is causing your uterus to contract back to its normal size.”

“Oh.”

Harry turned and stared out of the window, keeping his mouth closed as the baby was taken from him. He felt the gentle rocking of the bed as Severus winded her, and then she was placed to his other breast. He refused to look. He just couldn’t. The feeding of his daughter seemed to stretch on for hours, but the clock he could see out of the corner of his eye told him that the whole process barely lasted ten minutes.

When it was over, Severus refastened the cups of his bra and buttoned up his top before taking the silent child from him. He felt lost without her warm slight weight in his arms but said nothing. It was better this way, better that she didn’t get attached to her carrier. What if he couldn’t want her?

“Do you want me to take her away, Harry?” Solarin asked him. He shook his head and she nodded at him.

He accepted his food from Solarin and kept his eyes on his plate as Severus changed the little girls nappy. Solarin removed the empty tray from his lap just as Severus finished rocking the baby back to sleep. He declined watching as Severus tucked her back into the bassinet, focussing instead on the birds building a nest in the tree just outside the window.

Severus turned to his sister, casting a worried glance at his husband.

“Do not tell anyone of this. It may just be hormones. Do not worry them unnecessarily,” Severus advised and she nodded. She cast a final look at Harry before leaving the room, leaving the three of them alone. Severus sat down beside Harry, wondering what to do.

“You need to take your potions, love,” Severus said gently and Harry nodded.

The sprite gulped them down without a single word and slid down in the bed, rolling onto his side.

“I’m tired,” Harry mumbled, his eyes wide as they stared out into the room.

“Do you want me to stay with you while you sleep or will you be all right if I go and take a shower?” Severus asked, stroking his hand along the slim shoulder. He knew Harry was lying to him, but he ignored it. If Harry wanted to be alone, he would leave him be. At least until he figured out how to handle this new development.

“I’ll be fine. The baby is asleep, right?”

“Yes.”

“Then I’ll be fine.”

Severus hesitated. “Harry…”

“I don’t want to talk about it right now.”

Harry’s voice was bland, unemotional. Severus decided that he would let Harry have his moment.

“All right, later then, when you feel more ready. I’m going for a shower and then for something to eat. I’ll be about an hour. She shouldn’t wake up.”

“Fine.”

Severus kissed his temple and gathered fresh clothes before leaving the room, Harry lying lifeless in the bed, his back to the basket containing his child.

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Harry lay there, thinking things over. He felt like such a coward. He was scared to look at his own child. When she had finally left his body, he had been too tired and in too much pain to actually look at her, just a quick glance between her legs to verify what Severus had told him. But to actually look at her terrified him. One question plagued him: what if?

What if she looked like Lucius? What if all he could see in her was his rapist? What if he couldn’t bear to look at her if she looked that way? What if he couldn’t want her?

Every time he looked at Draco, the blond hair would remind him of what Lucius had done to him. Over the past few months he had come to associate Draco with his salvation more than with his father. But it was still there, that split second moment when he would remember.

He could hear the shower running and wondered what Severus would think of to reassure him if he knew. Why hadn’t he told him? Harry didn’t know why. There was nothing he had really kept from Severus. There were a few details he had skimmed over but he hadn’t hidden anything from him since his rescue.

He realized he was afraid of what Severus would think of him. What kind of parent was he starting out as if he couldn’t even look at his baby? They had spent months preparing to become parents and Harry had seen how much Severus had been looking forward to it. If he couldn’t want the child, Severus would let him give her away. But the man would be crushed.

He knew he had to look at her, his need to know outweighing his fear. It took him a few minutes to accomplish it but he rolled over to Severus’ side of the bed. He took a few deep breaths and let himself glimpse into the basket.

Severus had been wrong, she was awake. Maybe she had been playing a trick on him or something, maybe she had only slept for a minute or two. Or maybe she knew that her carrier was watching her. He didn’t know but he wished she was asleep. She was staring up at the ceiling with unfocussed eyes. Somehow, Harry had thought that looking at her would have been easier if she was asleep. He reached out and pulled the basket a little closer, her head turning at the noise of the stand being pulled across the wooden floor, so he could get a better peek at her. He lay there on his side, staring at the tiny girl.

She was very small; from head to toes she was barely the size of a bag of flour. Harry pondered on why she hadn’t felt that small coming out. She was skinny like he was, but she had that soft plumpness kind of skinny that made her look all squishy and huggable. She had a slight cone head, but he knew that she had gotten that from the pressure of birth. He knew it would fade. She had dark hair that formed into short fuzzy curls. That came from him and he felt his pounding heart slow at the sight. He knew that he definitely wouldn’t have taken it well if his child had been blonde.

Her eyes were a cross between blue and green, leaning more towards green. He reached out and grabbed his book from Severus’ bedside table where he had left it. He flicked through and found that most fair-skinned babies were born with blue eyes, and that they changed to their natural colour within few weeks of birth. He slipped the book back to its place. They could change, they could be green, like his. She could have inherited his mothers eyes. It looked likely that they would go green and it soothed him. He would not have Lucius’ eyes staring up at him. He clung to that hope.

She had tiny little hands and feet, and a little round belly. She was so small that someone had been forced to roll back the sleeves of her blue baby grow. He rolled back to his side of the bed and retrieved his wand, gasping at the pain of moving. He propped himself up on one elbow and summoned a fresh baby grow. He resized it to fit her. Why someone else hadn’t done so with the first was beyond him. Maybe they had been waiting for him to take charge. While he was at it, he changed the colour of the garment from blue to a soft powdery pink. He was wary of doing any spells on the one she was wearing. He just hoped that he could figure out how to change her, she looked so fragile. But, he reasoned she had survived birth so she couldn’t be as breakable as she looked. It didn’t stop him feeling that she should be treated the same way Severus treated him, like spun glass. He placed his wand on top of his book and looked at her again before making his decision on what to do next.

As far as he could tell, the only thing that could have come from Lucius was her paleness. She seemed to glow in the afternoon light she was so fair skinned. To him, she vaguely resembled Solarin, with her lily white skin and dark hair, and he found it comforting. His daughter was not blood related to her aunt, but she did kind of look like her. It gave him a sense of calm that she remind him of such a good woman.

He sat up slowly and eased himself into a better position. He reached out and carefully picked her up, holding her just the way the book and Severus had told him to before she was born. Support her head, support her body. Don’t drop her. They were easy enough to remember, even if his hands did shake with nerves as he did it. She was so light, and the skin on the back of her neck and head was so soft. He laid her down on the bed and propped himself up on some pillows. He picked her up again and laid her on his thighs so she was facing him, his knees drawn up. She was kind of sitting on his cramping stomach but Harry felt comforted by her being so close to her former home.

He slowly opened the poppers and eased her arms out of the loose one piece. He slipped his hand under her nappy covered bottom to lift her body, allowing him to slip it off her legs. She lay there in nothing but a nappy, trying to focus on him. Damn, she had his knobbly knees. Poor thing. Her toes were not even as big as his pinkie nail. She kicked him as he ran his fingertips over the velvety skin of her feet, but she didn‘t voice a complaint. It was as if she knew that he needed to examine her. He put the new baby grow on her the same way he had taken the other one off, but in reverse. First the feet, then the legs, lifting her squishy rear end to pull the soft fabric up to cover her back. He carefully eased one arm into its sleeve and then the other, finding the second one a little more difficult and required three attempts to actually manage it. He fastened the poppers and smiled down at her.

She was such a placid little girl. She had stayed silent through that whole long process. He was sure that Severus or someone else in the house would have been much faster at changing her than he had been but it had been worth it. She looked more like a proper girl now, instead of that genderless look she had in the blue. He tickled his fingers over her tummy, looking at her little nose. He examined her tiny ears, her rosebud mouth, her fingers.

She was looking up at him, her eyes unfocussed. He knew from the book that he would appear fuzzy to her at this distance but he knew she would be able to smell that it was him. He didn’t know how, but the book had told him that she would. He raised his knees a little higher, bringing her closer. It appeared that she could actually see him now, and her eyes locked with his. He took in a deep breath before speaking.

“I don’t know what you’re expecting from me. I’m only sixteen, barely old enough to be your carrier. I’m not even a fully qualified wizard yet. I’m not even legal. I never planned on you. You were not my choice, you were his. I hated you in the beginning, when you were the reason he caused me so much pain and humiliation. And then I wasn’t sure if I even wanted to keep you after you arrived.” He stroked the soft black curls, so black they almost shone blue. They seemed to be more tame than his own rats nest. Maybe she wouldn’t hate her hair when she got older the way he had hated his for years. “But I don’t hate you now. I don’t know if you already know this but I want to tell you anyway. You need to understand why I was afraid. I’m sorry that I didn’t want to hold you, that I couldn’t look at you. I was afraid that you would look like him. I love you, I have from the moment I realized that you must have still been with me because you were special. You are special. But I couldn’t have raised you if you looked like him.” He let her grip his fingers. Her tiny fists held on so tight. She let out a little caw and he smiled at her. She sounded like a happy little crow. “But you don’t look like him, you look like me. I’m sorry about the hair but you can blame that on your grandpa James, it’s his fault. And the knees, I’m sure you can blame those on him as well. I love you, and I’m sorry that we didn’t get off to the best start. I promise I’ll try harder. I promise that I’ll do my best.”

She yawned and blinked sleepily at him. He maneuvered her to lie on her front on his chest, her ear pressed against him right above his heart, and slid down the bed so they were lying together. Her toes barely reached his navel. She snuggled against him and he pulled up the comforters, wrapping her up. The weather had suddenly turned sour and it was getting cold in the room. Someone had left a window open.

“I’m sorry you don’t have a name yet. We thought you were going to be a boy. See, you’re showing us how special you are already just with your gender. No one like me has ever had a girl as their first child. You are so exceptional, so special, that you made history as you took your first breath.” He ran his hand along her back as she fell asleep, his other hand cradling her bottom. “I’m your carrier and you’re mine. You’re my baby, and I’m never giving you up.”

He kissed the top of her head as Severus re-entered the room. The man paused in the doorway and stared at the two of them on the bed, cuddled up together under the blankets, Harry stroking her back like she was the most important thing in the world to him.

Severus was stunned. He had left Harry not even able to look at the child, and there he was, holding her close, gazing at her with wonder on his face. He didn’t quite understand what the hell had happened. He had only been gone an hour.

“Harry? Was she crying? I can take her, if you want,” Severus said cautiously as he moved forwards slowly and sat on the bed beside the two of them.

“No, she was just lying there, staring up at the ceiling,” Harry replied, playing with her dark curls. “I’m fine with her, we’re having cuddles.”

“I don’t understand,” Severus said, careful not to bring up Harry’s rejection of holding her but he was mystified by this change. He waited for Harry to answer him. His husband seemed to be in more of a mood to talk to him now.

“I was afraid,” Harry admitted in a whisper, looking at Severus. “I was afraid that she’d look like him. And if she looked like him I couldn’t have raised her. I love her more than I ever thought I could, but I couldn’t have raised her if she looked like Lucius.”

“I understand. And what do you think of her now?” Severus asked gently.

“She looks like me. All she got from him is her paleness. I think her eyes will turn green, don’t you think so?” Harry asked as he ran a fingertip over one impossibly small fist, over the slope of her nose. She snuffled in her sleep.

“We all imagine green, those of us who have seen her. We doubt they will turn blue, we are very sure they will be green like yours,” Severus confirmed, settling himself more comfortably in his seat, kicking off his slippers.

“I can’t handle it if her eyes turn blue. It’s good that they’ll probably turn green. Green like my mothers. Will she get cold with that draft from the window?”

“I shouldn’t think so while she is tucked up with you like this. I can close it if you wish.”

“No, it’s okay. If she’s fine where she is then it can stay open.” Harry looked at Severus. “Why don’t you come and cuddle with us?”

Severus smiled and slipped into the warm bedding with them, propping himself up on one elbow. He ran his fingers over the dark downy curls.

“She might end up with proper curls instead of it just being wild like mine. But she has got my knobbly knees. She probably won’t thank me for that later. I think she looks a bit like Solarin, though. They‘re both pale with dark hair. And Solarin is a good woman, and a good witch. It makes me feel better that she kind of looks like her,” Harry said, tilting his head to peer at his sleeping child.

“She does vaguely resemble her. Strange seeing as how they’re not actually blood related.” Severus paused and lifted his hand to run his fingers through Harry’s hair. “Tell me, love. Do you want her?”

Harry reached out and slipped his hand around the back of Severus’ neck, pulling him in for a sweet kiss, his other hand keeping the newborn steady. “I want her. I can let myself really want her now I know she looks like me and not him. I’ve wanted her ever since I realized how special she must be. And she is special. She was meant to be a boy. She made history,” Harry confirmed.

Severus chuckled and kissed Harry once more.

“She’s beautiful, isn’t she?” Harry asked, running his fingers over her little feet, his hand still cradling her squashy backside. She kicked in her sleep at his gentle touch. She would probably end up being very ticklish.

“Absolutely gorgeous,” Severus agreed, smiling at the two of them, carrier and daughter.

“I managed to change her into a new baby grow. I wanted her in a pink one that fit. I changed her all by myself,” Harry revealed proudly.

“All by yourself? I am very proud of you. It is rather impressive that you managed to do it without assistance your very first try,” Severus praised and Harry beamed at him. Harry contemplated the tiny newborn for a moment.

“She doesn’t have a name. We never thought of any girls names.”

“Well, we shall have to decide on one for her.” Severus wasn’t quite sure if he wanted to ask his next question, but it had to be asked. “Harry, do you still want me to be her father, to help you raise her?” he asked quietly, his gaze flickering between Harry and the neonate.

Harry looked at him like he was mad. “You’re nuts. Of course I do. You’re her father, her daddy. We’ve been talking to her for months. She already knows you’re her daddy. Little girls need their daddies,” Harry reassured firmly.

Severus leaned in and kissed him, the kiss becoming heated fast. Severus wanted to hold Harry and show him just how much his words meant to him. But he restrained himself. Harry still had their daughter on his chest and was still sore. It would be a few weeks, if not months, before Harry was ready to be shown how much Severus adored those words.

He felt himself relax, a silly smile taking up permanent residence on his face. The two of them settled down to discuss possible names for their daughter, watching her sleep.

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Charlie watched Draco attempting to make dinner and tried not to laugh. Solarin had taken it upon herself to teach Draco all the things he would need to know to survive. The Daily Prophet four days ago, delivered the morning after Harry had his baby, had informed them all that Lucius had publicly disowned his son. The public line was that Lucius was disowning him for abandoning his family responsibilities, that he had gone against Lucius’ wishes and abandoned his arranged marriage to Pansy, but they all knew better. Lucius was punishing his son for helping Harry escape.

They had wondered why Lucius hadn’t done it sooner, and what was the point of doing it if he had no other male heir, but Draco’s ashen face and threatening tears had made them drop the subject. Solarin had appointed herself his mentor. Without his inheritance or family name he would have to get along just like any other wizard. What had disturbed Draco the most was that he no longer had a name, his father had stripped him of it. Legally, he could never claim himself to be Draco Lucius Malfoy again. He needed a complete new name. His father had taken everything from him, and, legally, he was allowed to. By Wizarding Law, Draco had abandoned any right to his inheritance, his family, his name and anything else owed to him as soon as he had gone against his father. As soon as he had gone against Lord Malfoy, Lord Malfoy had legally been able to take everything his son had and cast him aside. There was no legal standing against it. It was Pureblood bigotry at it’s strongest, and it had seeped into modern Wizarding Law. Molly had shocked everyone by proclaiming Lucius to be a sadistic pathetic son of a bitch. Their shock subsided when they realized that her out of character language had made Draco laugh.

Arthur had explained to him that, as he was sixteen and still a minor in the Wizarding World until August, he could choose another family name, that he could choose his own relatives now. It had slightly comforted Draco and he had set about claiming himself as a Lupin-Black. It had made Sirius smile that now he was a father to two teenage sons. He and Remus were thrilled. Draco was going to choose a new first name for himself as well, but he hadn’t found one he liked yet, so he was allowing everyone to continue calling him Draco for the time being. He considered it a way to make a fresh start with his life, and tried not to dwell on the fact that he had nothing left.

Draco had taken to Solarin’s teachings like a duck to water. He craved being useful, to fit in with his family. He was slowly learning how to get by without house elves to do everything for him. And that included learning how to cook.

“Right, you chop this. It can be roughly chopped so don’t worry about how it looks. Just cut it up like I showed you when we made lunch,” Solarin instructed, handing Draco an onion. Charlie marvelled at the way she managed to do things, like hand him the vegetable, and not touch him, not even a brush of fingers. He wasn’t sure he would have done it as smoothly as she had.

Draco examined it for a few moments before beginning to peel off the brown skin. Solarin moved away to put the pastry casings into the oven to blind bake.

Charlie didn’t know if Draco could sense that he was watching him, but he knew it didn’t matter. He couldn’t have Draco, so what was the point? He had been taken aside by Bill and told of Draco’s inability to handle physical contact, that there was something wrong with him. Until they could make whatever that was better, Charlie had no chance of being with the blond, no matter how much he wanted to be.

But it didn’t stop him falling for him. It wasn’t the way he looked, it was what was inside. If asked, Charlie would not have been able to tell what colour Draco’s eyes were, or how tall he was, or what his smile looked like. But he could divulge that Draco loved to joke, that he liked oranges, that he was good at potions. He could disclose that Draco’s favourite colour was purple, not green as everyone assumed, that he had a wickedly dry sense of humour, that Sirius was his favourite person to annoy.

For Charlie, Draco was not about the physical. For him, he was falling for Draco’s soul, for his heart, for his badly hidden protectiveness of his new family. Charlie found himself dreaming of Draco after only a few days of being around the blond. They were dreams that had him filled with longing. They weren’t sexual, but they were just as embarrassing. In his dreams, he and Draco would sit curled up together, talking about nothing in particular. He found himself wishing he could hold Draco for real, but he knew it would not happen.

His feelings didn’t stop him from admiring the way Draco’s arse looked in his tight black jeans. He was, after all, still male. He was going to look. And he found the sight of Draco very appealing.

He stopped staring at Draco as the door opened, revealing a shaky but smiling Harry supported by Severus. Sirius trailed in behind them, carrying the baby. She had yet to be given a name.

“Hello,” Solarin said. “Dinner will be ready in a bit.”

“What are we having?” Harry asked, retrieving his daughter from his godfather.

“Cheese and onion quiche with baked potatoes and salad. Draco is doing the onion,” Solarin said, hinting at how well Draco was doing.

“Sounds good. Can’t wait,” Harry said, seemingly genuine. He had been the taster for some of Draco’s attempts at cooking, and they were not pretty. When the two of them had cooked together back at Spinners End, whatever Draco had been given to prepare either came out burnt or raw, and had to be saved by Harry. He hoped Solarin would be able to salvage this meal.

“Yeah. Wonder if it’ll be better than my mums,” said Charlie, offering his own brand of praise for Draco’s efforts. He turned to look at the shyly smiling blond. “Draco’s doing really well with the…Draco!”

Charlie sprung up and rushed to the flaxen haired young man, the Slytherin looking at him in fear as he got closer to touching him. Solarin rushed forwards as well.

Draco’s hand was gushing blood. He had sliced clean through the skin and blood vessels.

Charlie reached him first. “I’m sorry, but I have to touch you,” he said as he took Draco’s hand and led him to the sink, holding the bleeding appendage under a stream of cold water.

“I…I…” Draco stuttered, looking at his hand in shock as Solarin began to heal it. Charlie was touching him, but his skin wasn’t crawling.

“Draco, why didn’t you see to it as soon as you cut yourself?” Severus asked, clearing up the now bloody half chopped onion. Everyone was looking at him. Sirius was bandaging up the healing wound. Charlie was hovering near him. Solarin was rescuing pastry from almost being burnt. Remus had come in and he was watching with parental concern. Harry was watching him, the baby in his arms squirming in her sleep at the tension in her carriers frame.

“I…I didn’t…I didn’t feel…” Draco stammered.

“You didn’t feel it?” Harry asked, trying to relax so his daughter would calm but his voice was shaking.

“No. I don’t feel anything.”

They were looking really worried. Had he said the wrong thing? He looked down and reached his undamaged hand out, slipping it into Charlie’s. The redhead looked at him in surprise but he ignored it. He knew he was touching him, that someone was touching his skin, but he couldn’t feel it.

“Draco, how does it feel to be holding Charlie’s hand?” Solarin asked him, the preparation of dinner abandoned.

“I can’t feel it,” Draco answered, staring at his hand joined with Charlie’s. He found, now his shock had worn off, that he wasn’t really panicking. He actually found this better than the crawling of his skin when someone had touched him before. They all looked worried, but he didn’t suffer any fear at all.

“Draco, let go of his hand,” Solarin urged gently, moving towards him. He glanced down and let go. “Okay, Draco, I want you to close your eyes. I’m going to touch you and I want you to tell me if you can feel it. Is that all right?”

He could feel himself nodding. He closed his eyes.

Severus watched as Solarin approached his godson. Draco unable to feel anything was a bad sign. It was clear that whatever was wrong with Draco was getting worse. They needed answers they had no way of finding.

Solarin ran her fingers over Draco’s back. “Can you feel that?” she asked and Draco shook his head. “How about that?” she asked as she stroked his hair. Another shake of the head. “This?” she questioned as she flicked his arm.

“Nothing, but I can hear you tapping something,” Draco said. He opened his eyes and gazed down at the red marks her flicking had left on his pale skin. “I can’t feel them,” he said interestedly.

Solarin looked at Severus.

“Draco, I need to ask you some things and I need you to be very honest in your answers,” Solarin ordered, making him sit down at the table and sitting opposite him. He nodded.

“We’ve established that you can’t feel your skin, but how about other things? Can you still tell if you’re hungry, if you need the bathroom?”

“Yes, I can still feel those.”

“Do you feel ill at all?” she asked, feeling his forehead for a fever and finding none.

“No. I just can’t feel my skin.”

“How long have you had this lack of sensation?”

“I don’t know. It wasn’t there this morning, or when we were making lunch. I accidentally burnt my hand, remember? I felt that.”

She peered at him for a moment. “So, it’s new. That’s reassuring. And you’re not about to have any embarrassing accidents on us right now, so that’s a plus.” She heaved a sigh. “Well, I don’t think that you’re in any immediate danger. But no more helping in the kitchen. It’s too dangerous if you can’t feel cutting yourself,” Solarin proclaimed.

“What do you think it is?” Draco asked.

“I think this is your symptoms getting worse,” she replied honestly.

“Can you make it stop?”

“Not yet. This whole thing is like a jigsaw puzzle. We have bunch of pieces and we’re trying to put them together, but a few pieces are missing, so it makes it harder for us. But we will put it together, I promise. We just need a little more time. Can you hold on for a little longer?”

“I can wait. It feels better being numb than having my skin crawling,” Draco agreed and she smiled slightly at him, smoothing his hair. Charlie admired how motherly she had become towards her student.

She glanced around the room. “Someone will need to start the shower off for him. If he can’t feel it then he could scald himself. I’m also wary of him spending too much time alone. Not being able to feel pain makes it dangerous. And I’m not sure which way these symptoms will go. They could get worse, or they could get better,” she theorized.

“I’ll take care of him,” Charlie said.

“Charlie…” Solarin began, but he interrupted her.

“He’s my friend. I’ll take care of my friend,” Charlie said firmly.

“You don’t have to, if you don’t want,” Draco chipped in.

“I want to,” Charlie replied, leaving no room for argument. Draco smiled at him and Charlie knew that it was worth it.

They all settled down after that, and dinner was delicious. That Draco kept earning worried glances went uncommented, that he was getting worse was not spoken of. They kept the conversation light, mostly suggestions for the baby’s name. Harry was getting really good at eating one handed, as long as someone cut it up for him, like Solarin had done before even sending his serving to the table.

Charlie peered down, his fork halfway to his mouth, as Draco’s hand slipped into his. He could touch him, Charlie could touch Draco. Even if Draco couldn’t feel it, he ran circles on the back of his hand.

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Charlie rolled over in his sleep and sat bolt upright as his door opened. He had opted to stay at Grimmauld Place for the time being, thinking it better to be near his friend right now, and had taken a room near Draco’s.

Said blond was standing uncertainly in his doorway.

“Draco? What’s wrong?”

“I…I’m scared,” came Draco’s broken whisper. “I can’t sleep.”

“Come in.”

Draco padded towards the bed and Charlie reached out a hand. Draco took it and allowed Charlie to pull him into the bed. The two of them lay facing each other, enough space for another person between them.

“I know you can’t feel anything, but it might help if you’re not alone,” Charlie said, raising Draco’s hand where he could see it before entwining their fingers, laying it on the pillow between their heads. “What are you scared of?”

“What if I’m the reason?”

“Reason for what?”

Draco looked at him. Charlie could feel him shaking. “The reason my father did those things to Harry. What if it’s something wrong with me that made him do that?”

“Draco, even if your father does know why you’re like this, it is in no way your fault that your father did those things to Harry. Your father did them for his own twisted reasons. It is not your fault,” Charlie assured.

“You promise?” Draco asked.

“I promise.”

They were silent for a while until Draco asked another question. “Do you think Solarin really will be able to fix me?”

“Well, Bill seems to think so, but he’s biased,” Charlie replied jokingly. He considered it. “I think she will. I’m going by Sirius’ reaction. Sirius and Solarin don’t get along too well but he trusts her to fix this. If he trusts that she can make it better, then she probably can.”

Draco nodded and uncertainty filled his face once more.

“Can I stay here with you tonight? I mean, you’re my friend and you said you’d take care of me and it might help if I wasn’t alone. If it’s not okay, I can go back to my own room,” Draco asked timidly.

“You can stay here. It’s okay.” Charlie lay there, watching the blond. “Can you feel if you’re cold?”

“No. I feel numb. I mean, I can tell if I’m hungry, or if I need the bathroom, and I know if I feel faint or dizzy, things like that. But I’m numb on the outside,” Draco revealed. “Why do you ask?”

“Because your hand is freezing,” Charlie replied.

“If I can’t tell, how do I get warm?”

Charlie considered it. His solution had a slight flaw to it. He would have to touch Draco, and to do that he felt it only right to tell Draco how he felt. He knew what Bill had told him, but Draco was different now. Draco didn’t seem to be having any trouble with physical contact.

“Draco, I need to tell you something,” Charlie admitted.

“You can tell me anything,” Draco said. “We’re friends.”

“Draco, I…I want…” Charlie huffed in frustration of himself. Draco’s hand reached out and moved through his hair the same way Solarin had done to Draco earlier. “I want to be more than your friend.”

Draco didn’t say anything, and his hand came to lay on the mattress between them.

“I know that it’s not an option right now, not until you’re better. I know that if I made any moves it wouldn’t feel right for you. But I thought you should know. If you want to go back to your own room now, and if you want someone else to take care of you, I’ll understand,” Charlie offered.

“Charlie, I…” Draco didn’t seem to be having much more luck than he had with this topic. “I don’t feel any sexual desires.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I don’t get aroused. I don’t have any sexual feelings at all, for anyone. I never have. But I like spending time with you, I like it better than I’ve ever liked spending time with anyone. You need to know that if you want me as more than a friend,” Draco explained.

“Oh.” He paused. “Never?”

“Never.”

Charlie lay there, lost in his own thoughts while Draco waited patiently for him. He hadn’t even considered Draco on a sexual level. Not yet, anyway. All he had wanted was to make Draco understand how much he meant to him, to sit there with him in his arms and tell him how he felt.

“It’s not about sex for me,” Charlie said. “I just want to be with you. If that only means that we’re just a little more than friends, that we just spend time together and hold hands, then I’m okay with that.”

Draco smiled at him. “Really?”

“Really.”

“Then…I mean…if that’s what being together as a couple means…spending time together and holding hands.…if only until I’m better…Charlie, will you be my boyfriend?”

Charlie smiled at the innocence in the question. “Yes, Draco, I will be your boyfriend.”

Draco sighed with relief. “Good. Because…I like spending time with you.”

“I like spending time with you too,” Charlie said, vaguely noticing that Draco had dimples when he smiled.

“So, how do I get warm if I can’t tell?” Draco asked.

“I could hold you, and tell you when you warm up,” Charlie offered. “We could cuddle…like Solarin and Bill do. Well…not quite like they do. But you get the idea. If…if you want to, that is.”

God, he was acting like a teenager again. He was twenty six, he should be more mature than this. But Draco just seemed to make him revert back ten years.

“Okay,” Draco said and Charlie watched as Draco turned over, facing away from him. The blond scooted back and Charlie felt himself grinning as Draco moved into his arms.

“I know that your arms are around me, I can see them, but can’t feel it,” Draco said. “But it’s not so bad being numb.”

“Really?” Charlie asked as he settled Draco in his arms, resting his head in the crook of his neck.

“Yeah. I mean, at least this way I don’t feel sick when someone touches me.”

“Well, I’m resting my head in the crook of your neck,” Charlie described. “And you’ve entwined your ankles with mine. Your feet are cold but they’re beginning to warm up.”

“Thank you, Charlie,” Draco whispered.

“You’re welcome.” Charlie laughed. “I kind of like it.”

“What?” Draco asked, amused.

“I know it’s kind of weird, but I like it. Me telling you what’s going on. It makes me feel…I don’t know…like I really am taking care of you.”

“Then I guess you can take care of me all you like,” Draco said, his eyes fixed on his fingers as he moved them over Charlie’s arm. “I can’t feel myself doing that but I see it.”

“I think we’re going to make a very good team,” Charlie said, smiling at the way Draco’s touch on his arm was so light it tickled.

“Me too.”

Draco had no more trouble falling asleep after that, and Charlie decided that he wanted to lay like this with Draco forever. Just like that, together, him taking care of his little Slytherin.

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Bill rolled over in his sleep to find the bed beside him empty. He cracked open his eyes and found Solarin curled in the window seat, staring out at the dark world below.

“Hey, you all right?” he asked, sitting up.

She uncurled herself and made her way back to bed, slipping into the covers. She lay on her back, her arms stretched over her head and Bill propped himself up on one elbow beside her.

“What’s on your mind, baby?” he asked, running his hand in circles across her covered stomach. “I can feel you worrying.”

“I’m guessing I’m not making a whole lot of sense right now in the connection,” she said, reaching out to toy with his hair.

“No, not a whole lot. Draco’s in there mostly, and there’s a bit about the Ministry, and something about Gringotts. That’s about all that is making sense.”

She smirked.

“I’m surprised you even managed to make that out. You’re getting better. It won’t be long before we’ll be completely clear on each other again,” she praised.

“You want to talk about it?”

She was silent for a long time, her hand still, and Bill almost began to believe that she had fallen asleep when she spoke.

“What if I can’t help him?” she asked, her fingers in his hair moving once more

“Draco?”

“Yeah. What if he gets really sick before I can figure this out?” she admitted.

“Well, you’re not alone. Tell me how I can help,” Bill said, his enthusiasm at three in the morning making her smile.

“You really are my second best hero, you know that?”

“I know, but I have always wondered who the first is,” Bill confirmed. “Will you tell me who number one is?”

“Severus. He’s my hero, my number one hero,” she explained.

“How do I bump him off first?” Bill joked.

“Sorry, but there is no chance. He’ll always be number one hero. You are a very close second.”

“How did he become number one, anyway?”

“I don’t want to talk about that,” she said sternly, and he knew that they weren’t joking anymore. Her fingers had left his hair.

He sighed. “Why won’t you tell me? Whatever it is you’re keeping a secret from me, you can tell me. You can tell me anything. Why won’t you tell me?”

“Because I can’t,” she said simply and he knew that this continuing argument between them would continue to burn, but it was over for tonight.

“Fine.” He took a deep breath. “So, how can I help?”

It took her a moment to answer. She always did that, went quiet for a minute or two after he brought up what she wouldn’t talk about. It worried him that whatever it was might truly be that bad. She had never even let it slip through the connection, she was that adamant about keeping it to herself.

“How much sway do you have at Gringotts?” she asked.

“A bit. Depends on what I have to use it for.”

“Do you think you could get me records on the Malfoy vaults and estates?”

He laughed. “Boy, you don’t like making it easy for me do you?” She laughed at him. “Well, I could probably get them, if I can convince one of the goblins to turn a blind eye. I’ll probably only be able to get replicas, not the real thing, and I will end up owing the goblin who lets me get them a huge favour.”

“Will you do it for me?” she asked, her fingers playing with his hair once more.

“I can try. I’ll go tomorrow,” he said and she kissed him, deep and possessive. He grinned greedily into the kiss. God, he had missed this.

“Will you settle on a joint first with Severus?” she asked against his lips.

“Yes.”

“Then you’re my number one as well. He can be number one brother and you can be number one love. Will that do?”

“Yes. I’ll settle for that.”

“Good.” She sighed. “I’m sorry I can’t tell you. I will, one day, when I’m ready. But I’m not yet.”

“I can wait. I’m here when you’re ready,” he agreed, even if he wanted to know, she had never hidden anything else from him. Well, except her issues with the Ministry but she had eventually revealed those. This was the only thing she refused to discuss. She always had, and it had never really bothered him. Until now.

“I need something else from you,” she said teasingly, running her fingertips along his shoulder. He let his mind drop the subject. For now.

“What?” he asked cautiously.

“I need you to ask your father to smuggle some things out of the Ministry for me.”

“Arin, if you asked the Minister, he’d give you anything you want.” She looked sheepish and he laughed. “You forgot about that, didn’t you?”

“Yeah,” she admitted.

“Just write a letter to Fudge and ask him for what you want.”

“But what if he asks why I want records on the Malfoy’s?”

Ah, a slight hitch in the plan. Solarin would not be able to reveal why she wanted the records without revealing Draco’s problems. And if she revealed them, Fudge would want him tested on, to try and ascertain if it was something that the wizarding public could catch. He would take Draco from them, and Bill wasn’t sure if even Solarin could stop them.

“Good point. I’ll talk to my father. What do you want him to get?”

“Anything he can on the Malfoy line. Anything. I just need somewhere to start.”

“Remus might be the one to go to for help on this. He pieced together the research on Harry, didn’t he?” Bill suggested.

“Yeah, he did. But he’s gotten really close to Draco in the past few days. I heard that it was hard enough for him to do it for one of his sons. I don’t think it would be fair on him if I asked him to do it for both his children. Besides, Remus keeps disappearing,” Solarin revealed.

“Disappearing? Where to?” Bill asked, tracing the tattoo near her navel.

“He keeps going off with Dumbledore. I’ve kept my mind out of it. Whatever it is, it’s private. I try to keep my abilities out of things that are not my business.”

“Probably a wise decision. Is there anything else you need from me?”

“Not that I can think of right now.”

“Good, because I want to hear the story behind this tattoo,” Bill said with a smirk, bending his head to outline it with his tongue.

She moaned. “It was my twentieth birthday present to myself. It’s two runes. The one on the left is Wynn, it means happiness. It means to appreciate life fully, value the love and laughter in your life, and to welcome the ordinary things that make your life complete. The one on the right is Hagall, it means hail. It means that enemies are teachers in disguise and every challenge is there to guide you.”

“How did you know that I wouldn’t remember my ancient runes?” he asked, kissing his way up, pushing her top before him.

She squirmed and moaned as his lips moved over her pale skin. “Because you burnt the text books when you graduated.”

He laughed and it made her shiver.

“What about the nose ring?” he asked as he took a nipple into his mouth.

“Ummm…twenty first birthday.” She gasped. “I…I chose silver because…because it helped focus me,” she stuttered, trying to focus without success. Her hands stole into his hair and pulled him up to kiss him. [Mine] she pushed into his head and he pinned her to the mattress.

They joined together, their union hard and fast. Sweat poured from them, teeth embedded into skin, nails carved a path. They used each other to forget, to lose themselves. When it was over, they lay entwined, Solarin’s head on Bill’s shoulder, her nails tracing paths on his chest.

“You know, I’m going to have to get you to tell me more stories,” Bill commented.

It earned him a slap on the chest but she gave a smile with it.

For now, he would settle for her promise to reveal all. It was enough. For now.

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Harry awoke to whimpering. He eased himself out of Severus’ arms and the warm bedding and padded over to the basket. He smiled down at his daughter, picking her up and holding her close.

She settled and began to root against him, searching.

“Eager, are we?” he murmured to her as he made his way back to bed, clumsily climbing back in. “Well, you’ll have to wait. Carrier only goes so fast, you know.”

“She probably can’t understand you yet,” Severus supplied. The obsidian eyed man was watching him, sitting up against the pillows and letting Harry settle against him, secure between the long legs. Severus curled one leg around Harry, snaking it under Harry’s slightly drawn up knees, and raised the other one, giving him support while he nourished the baby.

“I don’t care, I’m going to talk to her like that anyway,” Harry said stubbornly as Severus unbuttoned his top for him.

“It wasn’t a criticism. It was just an observation.”

Harry craned his head and caught his lips. “I know.”

Severus smiled at him and freed his breast, his arms coming to wrap around both of them as their little one latched on.

“I like your observations. They give me an excuse to be stubborn,” Harry said playfully.

“Careful, Potter, your Slytherin side is showing,” Severus joked, nuzzling his neck. Ever since Harry had told him he was nearly sorted into Slytherin he had been teasing him with it, whether it was true at the time or not.

“You love it.” Harry winced and looked down. “You want to be more gentle with carrier? I may need that boob again at some point.”

Severus chuckled. Harry tilted his head to give Severus better access to his neck. He moaned at the gentle nips and kisses.

“Will Draco be okay?” Harry asked.

“Solarin will figure it out. I have faith in her. She will take care of him,” Severus reassured. Harry nodded and kissed him. Severus devoted himself to Harry’s neck again, keeping the intimacy going during the nursing of their daughter.

“Severus?”

“Yes?”

“I think I’ve decided on her name.”

Severus pulled back and looked into the tired green eyes. “Finally? You’ve finally chosen one?”

“Yes, and don’t sound so shocked. I was bound to decide on one eventually. It’s only been five days.”

Severus kissed him possessively. He helped Harry detach her and wind her before she was attached to his other nipple. It was their way of keeping Severus involved. Harry was the only one who could feed her, and Harry had worried that Severus would become left out, so they had developed this little routine of doing it together.

“So, what are we going to call her?” Severus asked, running his fingers over her soft curls.

“I’ve decided on Miri Solarin Lily Potter-Snape. Miri means mine, which is true. She’s mine, and yours of course. But all the time I was pregnant I kept saying that she was mine. It seemed right for her,” Harry explained.

“It’s perfect, love. It’s perfect for her,” Severus soothed. Harry had seemed a bit flustered during his reasoning.

Harry smiled at him. “And then she has Solarin because she’s your sister, and Lily after my mother. Do you like it?”

“I love it. It’s just right for her. What do you think, Miri?” Severus asked the tiny girl. Her eyes had already turned bright emerald and she gazed up at her parents with them.

“I think she likes it,” Severus said. He kissed Harry again and Harry winced into the contact.

“Christ, she is trying to kill me with this,” Harry complained.

“Well, on the bright side, it looks like she’s done,” Severus consoled. They detached her and winded her, Harry holding her while Severus rubbed her back. She burped and together they rocked her back to sleep before Severus tucked her back into her basket, kissing her forehead.

Severus slipped back into bed and wrapped Harry into his arms, kissing him deep, like a brand.

“We have a family,” Severus whispered against his lips. “It’s all complete now she has a name. We can file her papers at the Ministry tomorrow.”

“Can we put you down instead of Lucius and get away with it?” Harry asked sleepily.

“She has my surname so you can put me down as her father without getting in trouble for it. However, legally, you don’t actually have to put down the man who provided the seed. Legally, she belongs to you and no other,” Severus explained.

“So I can put your name down?”

“Yes, you can.”

Severus moaned as Harry kissed him, his tongue snaking inside his mouth and duelling with his own. He really loved it when Harry showed his enthusiasm in this way.

“I love you,” Harry whispered. “You know that right?”

“I know. And I love you too.”

They snuggled down together and fell asleep until the next feeding, each smiling at their daughters title.

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Remus walked into the kitchen to find Solarin growling at a pile of papers.

“Something wrong?” he asked as he poured himself some tea and made some toast. Harry was hardly likely to come down at five in the morning so he felt it safe to enjoy the snack without upsetting anyone. With night feeds keeping he and Severus up, Harry usually slept until eight, when Miri demanded her breakfast, and then came down to join them all.

Solarin looked up at him. “I don’t know how you did it,” she complained, accepting a fresh coffee from him.

“Did what?”

“Sorted through all that paperwork on Harry. You have three times this much information on Harry. How the hell did you find any kind of order in it all?” she asked as he nibbled at his toast.

He smiled. “It took me a few days to get it in an order, and then it became easier to find what I actually needed. Is this all the stuff on Lucius?”

“Yes. Funny, I never expected Bill and Arthur to actually get me so much. I didn’t think they’d get even half this much.”

“I could help you with it if you like,” he offered.

She looked at him and he felt like he had said the wrong thing. Her eyes were kind and understanding, as if she knew something he didn’t.

“Remus, you did this for Harry. It’s not fair of me to ask you to do it for your other child as well,” Solarin explained.

“You’re not asking, I’m offering,” Remus argued.

“You’re busy. I can’t accept your help.”

“Busy with what?” Remus asked. He was confused. All he was doing with his days was clearing out the house and writing text books on defence. He quite enjoyed his profession. At least when he only wrote the text books, he had no one objecting to a werewolf teaching their children.

“You keep going off with Dumbledore,” she said lightly, and he blanched. “I haven’t pried into it. I just keep seeing the two of you going off together. It’s obviously private so I haven’t used my abilities. It’s none of my business. But, like I said, you’re busy.”

He hadn’t realized anyone had noticed him slipping away. He debated the wisdom of telling her what the meetings were for. Only Sirius knew, and he wondered if she would tell Harry what he was doing if she knew.

“Can you keep a secret?” he asked.

“If I’m told something in confidence I can keep it to myself. If need be, I can even keep it from Bill. If you want to tell me, I can keep it to myself, if that is what you’re worried about.”

“You can keep things from Bill?”

She smiled at his disbelief. “If I want to. He may be good at reading me and the connection may be strong, but I’m still the augur in the relationship. I’m still in control of keeping my secrets to myself,” she said, and Remus noticed that she looked uncomfortable at the word ‘secrets’. He decided that she would not tell Harry, and that Dumbledore’s advice of telling someone his concerns might help him may just be true.

“I have experienced a little agitation accepting some things to do with Harry,” he admitted. “I need to reassure Sirius, so I have to appear to believe everything I say in my approval of it all. But I admit, I found it hard to deal with the thought of Lucius touching him, of what Lucius did to him. Sometimes the imagination is a terrible thing. His panic after he was rescued was difficult to watch, knowing that only Severus could really help him with it. I felt a little helpless knowing I couldn’t help my son the way Severus could. And then I had a little trouble with the idea of my son marrying a man old enough to be his father. And the notion of Harry having a baby at sixteen. It was a little hard for me to deal with.” He sighed. “Of course, it didn’t help that I watched Harry give birth. I felt useful, Harry needing me to be there, but seeing him in so much pain was troublesome for me. Just knowing that he was in so much pain and not being able to do anything to ease it didn’t sit well with me.”

“Understandable. It’s the mark of a good father that you had all those concerns. You should feel grateful that you have them. They prove that you’re a good parent, that you love him enough to have these issues,” she reassured and he smiled shyly, contemplating her. Albus had been right, it did feel better offering his problems to a fresh ear. She had rationalised it in such a simple way that it suddenly made him feel better about the last few months he had spent worrying. He had obviously chosen the right fresh ear. She had seemed to soothe him with such ease.

“You would make a wonderful shrink. Have you thought of it as a career?” he said in all seriousness.

“Vaguely. But with the Minister awarding me compensation for what the Department of Mysteries did to me, I don’t ever have to work again if I don’t want to.”

“The cheque was that large?”

“The Minister was feeling very guilty,” she said with a smirk. “I quite like the idea of your profession, though. It seems very calm, writing books. I might turn my hand to that.” She held up her pack of cigarettes. “Do you mind if I smoke? I’ll open the window.”

He smiled and shook his head. “Not at all, go ahead,” he said and she flicked her wand at the window, the glass springing open. She lit up and he wondered how she could make smoking look so easy. He had tried it once in his youth and he had been as sick as a dog. He supposed it must have been practice. “What subject would you write about?”

“Severus suggested I write about how to adapt to the Muggle World. Instructional books for wizards.”

“A novel idea,” he said and she laughed at him. He smiled and took a deep breath. “More recently, I have had trouble accepting Miri. In the beginning, I mean.”

“How so?” she asked concernedly.

“I was worried she would look like Lucius,” Remus admitted. “It made it hard for me to accept her, at first. I kept looking for him in her. I adore her now, now I know she looks like Harry. She’s his little clone, and that makes it easier.”

“I see. And Dumbledore is helping you to deal with these problems you have?” she said carefully. Severus had confided in her that Harry had experienced the same fears and they had led to the problems with Miri’s first feed. She was surprised that no one else had expressed the same issues. She felt relieved that Remus had eased her confusion.

“Yes. My inner wolf still has a little trouble with her, and I have no idea why. Albus can’t figure it out, nor Sirius. Only time will tell with the beast. You won’t tell anyone, will you?”

“Of course not. As I said, it is private. If asked, I will say I know nothing and it is none of my business. As for the wolf, give it time is my suggestion.”

He smiled at her. “Thank you.”

“For what?” she said with a wink and he laughed.

He turned to the pile of papers. “Would you like some help?”

“Are you sure you’ll be all right with dealing with all this information on Lucius?”

“Yes. It’s to help Draco, I’ll be fine with it.”

“Then yes, I would love some help,” she said, pushing the parchment pile closer to him. “All I’ve managed to work out is that there are a lot of Malfoy’s. Oh, and some weird thing about inheritance laws that I couldn’t quite understand. It was something to do with dowries.”

“Well, let’s get down to work,” Remus said.

Together they began to work through the mass of information, and were still organising when the others joined them for breakfast.

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Harry looked up in surprise as the smell of smoke entered the kitchen. Miri whimpered and wriggled in his arms and he noticed that he had roughly pulled her away from his nipple in his shock. He had gained confidence with his parenting skills in the three weeks since Miri had arrived and was now comfortable feeding his child in front of his family as well as Severus. It had caused a few odd looks the first time he did it, along with rather spectacular blushes from Sirius and Draco, but now it had become common place for people to walk into a room to find Harry topless with his bra open, revealing everything. Severus had assured Harry that he wouldn’t have to wear the bra any longer than Miri needed to nurse, and she would begin weaning at four months. Harry had accepted it and was gladly looking forward to the day when he could rid himself of the garments. He wished he could do it now, but he was still tender and the female underwear did help, so he continued to wear it constantly, even to bed. The only time he did take his bra off was to bathe.

“Sorry, sweetheart,” he apologised as he latched her on again. “Where is that smell coming from?”

Remus looked up from his papers. “I assumed it was Bill’s cooking,” he said, earning a glare from Bill. The redhead was standing at the cooker, stirring the stew that was promised for dinner. Solarin chuckled from the sink where she was peeling potatoes and Bill threw her a dirty look.

“It’s coming from the fireplace,” Severus said from where he sat to Harry’s left. As the words left his mouth, Albus stepped through the floo with Molly and Arthur following soon after. All three of them were covered in ash and smelled strongly of smoke.

“What happened?” Bill said, he and Charlie rushing to their parents.

“The Burrow has gone up in smoke, as has Spinners End. Lucius has burnt them down,” Albus supplied.

“When?” Harry asked, his mouth dry.

“Spinners End went up a few hours ago. The Burrow is still ablaze. Molly and Arthur were still inside when he started the fire.”

Molly and Arthur were helped to seats by their sons and Harry noticed that even through his obvious shakiness, Arthur still sported a slight blush at his exposed chest. He covered up the free breast he had absentmindedly left exposed, Arthur nodding gratefully at him.

“Are you all right?” Severus asked the shell-shocked couple.

“We’re all right,” Molly confirmed. “But everything is gone. Ron, Hermione and Ginny are supposed to be coming home from Hogwarts tomorrow, what are we going to do?”

“There’s plenty of room here, you’ll stay here with us until we figure this all out,” Sirius assured.

“We can’t impose,” Arthur argued but Remus held up his hand.

“You’re family. It is no imposition. Besides, where would you take your children if not here? You will all be safe here. Hermione is due in July, you need somewhere safe for her. Ginny is underage. You will stay here, if only for the time being,” Remus declared firmly. Molly kissed him on the cheek.

Harry detached Miri and handed her to Severus to wind. He refastened his bra and pulled on his t-shirt. It was all his fault. Lucius had done this because of him. He felt more than guilty, he felt paralysed. The Weasley’s were some of the best people he knew, Molly was the closest to a mother he had. They had nearly been killed because of him.

“I’m so sorry,” Harry mumbled. He watched Severus pass Miri to Solarin and felt him gather him into his arms as his tears began to fall. “It’s all my fault, I’m so sorry.”

“Harry, dear, this isn’t your fault,” Molly soothed. Her kind tone made him feel even worse, if it were possible.

“Yes, it is. If it wasn’t for me he wouldn’t have done this. You could’ve died and it’s my fault.”

He was crying outright now and Miri was beginning to whimper at the tension in the room. She never cried outright but she did whimper, and it just made Harry feel awful at that moment. His daughter and he were the reason the Ron and Hermione and Ginny had no home to go to. They were the reason Hermione had nowhere to have her baby. Molly and Arthur had lost everything because of him, because of her.

Arthur got up from his seat and settled in the one next to Harry’s, forcing him to look at his gentle reassuring smile.

“Harry, you’re family. We knew that Lucius would get worse, we chose to take the risk of staying at the Burrow. We’re safe, that’s all that matters. Everything else is just stuff. It can be replaced. This is not your fault. It is Lucius’. He did this, not you,” Arthur placated.

“But he wouldn’t have done it if it wasn’t for me and Miri,” Harry argued.

“You’re being stubborn again,” Severus murmured in his ear. “This wasn’t your fault, love. Believe us. It was not your fault. Don’t blame yourself for this.”

“You promise it wasn’t my fault? You promise he didn’t do this because of me and Miri?” Harry questioned. He knew Severus was telling him what he wanted to hear, telling him pretty lies. But he didn’t mind. He accepted it.

“I promise. Lucius did this because he is a sadistic son of a bitch, and believe me, I know. I met his mother once. Horrible woman,” Severus promised, making Harry let out a shaky laugh. Solarin came forwards and Harry gathered Miri in his arms, holding her close. She let out her crow like call and he smiled shakily. “He did this because he is punishing us, because we have you and he doesn’t. It is not your fault, it is his. He’s jealous, love. He wanted to keep you and you wouldn’t let him, we wouldn’t let him. He’s being a spoilt, self-indulgent little boy throwing a temper tantrum. All right?”

Harry nodded and Albus began to clean up Molly and Arthur with his wand. He siphoned off the ash and dispelled the lingering odour of smoke. When he was done, they still looked a little shaky, but over all much better.

“All your books are gone,” Harry said to Severus.

“There are plenty to keep me occupied here. They can be replaced.”

“Wasn’t there anything in Spinners End you will miss?”

“I have all I need from that house. I have you and Miri. That’s all I need,” Severus said firmly and Harry smiled.

“So, what now? What about Ron, Hermione and Ginny? They can’t go to Kings Cross tomorrow. Lucius can get to them there,” Charlie asked.

“I will bring them through the floo myself,” Dumbledore replied easily, cleaning himself up. “I must leave you, I must report this to the Ministry.”

“We’ll see you tomorrow,” Sirius said.

“Thank you, Albus. Thank you for everything,” Arthur said and the old wizard nodded. With a polite farewell he was gone.

Miri sneezed and everyone noticed smoke for another reason entirely.

“Bill!” Solarin cried, exasperated, retrieving the smoking pot from the stove and shoving it under the cold tap.

“Why are you yelling at me? You could have saved it!” Bill said angrily.

“Because you were meant to be taking care of it!”

“Excuse me, but my parents were just almost burnt to a crisp. I apologise if they’re a little more important to me than a stew.”

“Don’t get sarcastic with me!” she threatened, advancing on him.

Harry had never seen the two of them fight, and this one had seemed to come out of nowhere. He had never even seen them bicker. Severus seemed to be stunned as well, as did everyone else. Maybe Severus had been right when he had claimed to never have seen the two of them fight before. Maybe they never had.

“Why not? You do it all the time, Miss Slytherin,” Bill snapped.

“Oh, so you’d rather I was all noble like you? Sorry, but joining the society for lost little puppies isn’t my thing,” she spat. The glasses began to shake.

“No, I’d rather you were god damned human! You might not give a fuck about your parents, but I care about mine! I shouldn’t be surprised, you’re a cold hearted bitch!”

She reached out and slapped him hard across the face, her nails catching his skin and opening a gash just under his eye. The tumblers exploded, raining shards onto the floor. Bill’s angry statement hung in the air between them, as solid as a brick wall. Miri squirmed in Harry’s arms at the anger sizzling through the room.

“How dare you?” she breathed. She looked slightly shocked by her own actions.

“You are cold hearted. You won’t open up. Why won’t you tell me?” Bill accused.

“Fuck!” she screamed. “It’s been weeks and you’re still on this!”

“Yes! I’m still on this! We’re meant to be together and you’re keeping secrets from me! Just tell me!”

“No!”

“Why? Why won’t you tell me?”

“Because it’s none of your fucking business, that’s why! You’re the good hearted Gryffindor, finish off dinner yourself!” she yelled and threw the dishtowel at him before storming from the room, the door slamming behind her.

The room was deathly silent and Bill was breathing heavily through his nose, his fists clenched at his sides. No one seemed quite sure what to say.

“Are you all right?” Arthur asked.

“Fine. Just peachy,” Bill snapped.

“What was that all about?” Molly enquired.

Bill turned on her. “Like she said, none of your business. Stay out of it.” With that he stomped from the room and they heard the front door slam a few moments later.

“What just happened?” Draco asked from where he was half hidden behind Charlie. Charlie turned and pulled Draco into his arms.

“I’m rubbing your back,” they heard Charlie mutter to him and Draco nodded, watching his arms as they wrapped around Charlie’s ribs.

“I have no idea,” Severus said, his voice full of shock. “I’ve never seen the two of them like that. They didn’t do that at Hogwarts, not once in their whole time there. The worst they ever go to was bickering.”

Sirius began to clean up the kitchen and Molly moved to fix something else for dinner. Remus slipped from the room and returned a few moments later with an angry looking Solarin. They all decided not to ask her why that had flared so spectacularly.

“I should go and put Miri down,” Harry said and gathered her more securely to his chest. Severus kissed his cheek and he left the room. There was a long uncomfortable silence.

“What should I make?” Molly asked cheerfully, trying to dispel some of the tension.

“How about that chicken casserole you did the other week? That was delicious,” Draco suggested and Molly set about cutting up a chicken.

“I’m sorry,” Solarin said quietly as Molly slipped the covered dish into the oven. “I’m sorry you all had to witness that.”

“What happened?” Severus asked as Harry slipped back into the room.

“It’s nothing. It’s our issue,” she replied and Severus dropped the subject.

They all ate dinner in silence, all of them throwing covert glances at the dark haired woman stabbing at her plate.

Bill didn’t come back that night, or the one after that. When he did finally come back he chose to sleep on Charlie’s floor. Harry wondered if the two of them would ever work things out if they couldn’t even stay in the same room together for more than five minutes. Solarin became more and more distant as the days wore on. Harry spent most of his time in his room with Ron, Hermione and Ginny, the three of them fussing over Miri.

As the days turned into a full week of silence between the once flawless couple, Severus began to look more and more worried.

It was starting to become a war zone.

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Severus’ dream was crying. That couldn’t be right. Harry didn’t cry in his sleep anymore.

He cracked his eyes open and felt his heart leap into his throat as he caught sight of Harry sitting up in bed.

“Relax, it’s not me,” Harry said, his voice sleepy but light. “I’m giving Miri cuddles, she’s a little restless.”

Severus groaned as he sat up. “Is she all right?”

“She’s fine, just a little restless. Kind of like she was when she was inside me. I tried feeding her but she’s not hungry, and she’s not wet. She doesn’t seem to be unhappy, just wide awake.”

“You should have woken me,” Severus assured.

“It’s all right. I was going to if she didn’t settle soon.”

“I’m surprised I didn’t wake up to her when you did.”

“It’s only been two hours since her last feed. I think me and you have adjusted to a weird body clock thing. I bet you’ll be awake at four when she actually wants feeding,” Harry reassured. Severus kissed him and kissed Miri’s tiny fist that was waving at him.

Severus became aware of the crying again and looked around confusedly.

“It’s coming from somewhere else in the house. I’ve been up for about ten minutes so I’m not quite sure how long it’s been going on,” Harry explained.

“Stay here, I’ll go and see who it is,” Severus instructed. He kissed Harry on the lips and Miri on the forehead before he left the room. He wandered through the house, steadily getting closer to the source of the disturbance.

He found himself outside Solarin’s room. It had been two weeks since the kitchen fight. Not word had been said between Solarin and Bill except to snap and yell at each other in the passing days. Three days ago, Bill had gone to stay with the twins in Diagon Alley. Remus was standing outside the door, knocking and trying to persuade Solarin to let him in.

“How long has she been crying?” Severus asked.

“About an hour. Well, as far as I know. She won’t open the door,” Remus explained. “Sirius has tried, as has Draco, Charlie, Molly and Arthur. Even Ron, Hermione and Ginny have given it a shot. She won’t talk to any of us. We were just about to come and get you.”

“It’s all right, I’ll take over. Go back to bed,” Severus reassured. Remus looked hesitant but he did go, leaving Severus facing the door alone. “Sol, it’s Severus. Let me in.”

“Go away,” came the quiet sob.

“Please, sweetheart. Please, let me in,” he said, using the same mellow tone he had when she was little, when she had still been timid.

“Please, just leave me alone.”

She sounded in real pain and Severus began to panic. She had once locked herself in the bathroom when she was about nine. Severus had eventually had to break down the door, she had let her magic flare wildly so his spells had not gotten through, and it turned out she had gotten into a fight at school. She had had a broken arm that time, so the pained sobs were not making him feel any better.

Severus raised his wand and performed an unlocking charm, finding she had not used magic to secure it. He opened the door and slipped into the room.

“I told you to go away, Sevus. Please, just leave me alone,” she begged. She was sitting on her bed, cross-legged, hugging herself. Tears were pouring down her face and she was having trouble breathing through her sobs.

She had called him Sevus. She only did that when she wanted something, was calming him, or was in trouble.

“I’m not going anywhere. Not until you talk to me,” Severus argued. He moved to the bed and sat down. He wasn’t surprised when she launched herself at him, sobbing into his chest. He rocked her, the way he had when she was small, and waited.

“Sevus,” she mumbled.

“I’m here now, Sevus is here. How about you tell me what the problem is, hmm? Maybe I can help,” he bargained.

She let out a shaky laugh. “Can you go back in time?”

“No. Unfortunately, Harry and his friends destroyed all the time turners when he was fighting Voldemort. But I might still be able to help. Tell me what’s wrong, sweetheart.”

She cried for a few more minutes before she answered.

“I’m losing him.”

“Bill loves you. I know he does,” Severus assured, not needing an explanation of who she was losing.

“But he doesn’t trust me, and I don’t blame him.”

He pulled her back and looked her in the eye. “Why doesn’t he trust you? What’s happened between you two? I’ve never seen you like this.”

“I’m keeping secrets from him, and he knows I am. That’s what he doesn’t trust, that I don’t trust him enough to tell him. But I do trust him, I trust him completely. But I can’t tell him. I don’t know how,” she admitted. “I can’t tell him about mum.”

Severus sat there stunned. He had always assumed she had told Bill about their parents when she was in Hogwarts. Maybe not all of it but at the very least told him that their mother had been slaughtered by their father. He had never considered that she would have kept it a secret.

“Why can’t you tell him?” he asked.

“How can I? How do I tell someone who’s parents are the most loving wonderful people that my father killed my mother? How do I tell him that?”

Severus could see the problem. Bill could not fully understand. Solarin could barely remember their mother, and the most vivid memory she did have of her was her death. Bill had grown up with a loving family, with no fear, no pain, no drunken slurs and badly concealed sobs of agony and misery. He and Solarin had spent their formative years listening to fights, witnessing abuse, suffering it. How did she tell him?

“I see. How bad is it between you?” Severus asked.

“I can barely feel the connection anymore. It’s so weak. He’s pulling away and I don’t know how to stop him,” she managed to get out before she dissolved into agonising sobs that threatened to choke her. He held her close and smoothed back her hair, soothing her the way he had done all those years ago.

Severus placed the dirty plates in the sink and turned on the water. Solarin was due to start Hogsmites the next day and he had allowed her to choose take away from The Three Broomsticks as their dinner.

Hogsmites was an elite primary school for gifted little witches and wizards. It was situated in Hogsmeade so he could teach and provide her with a good education simultaneously. Albus had helped him set it all up. They had a little house in Hogsmeade. It had only two bedrooms, a bathroom and a kitchen cum living room. It was a tiny cottage but it was theirs. It even had a small garden for Solarin to play in. It was perfect, and Severus felt, for the first time since he had left Hogwarts a year ago, that he was home.

He spun round as glass broke behind him. Solarin was standing at the table, staring in horror at the orange juice spreading from the broken cup that had slipped from her diminutive hands.

“Solarin,” Severus began kindly but he stopped when she burst into tears and backed up, turning and running from the room. He spelled away the mess and went in search of her. He found her hiding under her bed.

“Sol, come out of there,” he urged softly, watching her shake her head at him. “Sol, come on. I won’t hurt you, sweetheart. I’m not angry.”

“Really?” came her timid reply.

“Really. I’m not angry. It was an accident. I’m not going to hurt you for it, I know you didn’t mean to do it.”

She crawled out cautiously and he scooped her up, settling on the bed with her on his lap. She burrowed against his chest and sobbed. He smoothed back her hair, working out the dust that she had picked up from the floor.

“Sorry, Sevus. It was a ackdunt. I didn’t mean to,” she mumbled, mangling the word ‘accident’. She had no problems with the word ‘sorry’, though. She had said it too many times to their father.

“Sol, I know it was an accident. Your hands are very little, you’re bound to drop things. I’m not mad at you,” he explained.

“Daddy got mad,” she sniffed.

“Yes.” He sighed. “Yes, daddy got mad. Daddy got very mad. But I won’t hurt you like he did. I promise.”

“Never?”

“Never ever. I will never do that to you. Sol, I love you. You’re not meant to hurt people you love.”

She nodded and he held her for hours, telling her all the things she was good at, slowly undoing the damage their father had done.

Solarin fell asleep against his chest and he eased her into the bedding, tucking her in, before making his way from the room. He cast a tempus charm to find that it was three in the morning. He made his way downstairs to the kitchen. He needed a drink to settle his worries.

He had never seen his sister as happy as she had been with Bill. She had smiled with him, real smiles, not those fake ones she was so good at. She had actually laughed.

He was through his first whisky and onto his second when he noticed he was not alone in the kitchen. He turned around to find Bill sitting at the table, smoking one of Solarin’s cigarettes. Severus was mildly surprised to see him, he was supposed to be with Fred and George, but his surprise was quickly taken over by anger.

“Is she all right?” Bill asked, his voice quiet and resigned.

“No, she’s not and you know it! She can feel you pulling away! She fucking cried herself to sleep! She’s terrified she’s about to lose you!” Severus snarled.

“She is,” Bill said simply.

“You promised me! You swore to me that you would never hurt her!” Severus yelled, slamming his glass down on the table between them.

“I never meant to!” Bill argued. “You think I like this? You think I enjoy seeing her in pain, hearing her crying? I hate it but it’s not working with us!” Bill seemed to deflate. “I don’t know what to do,” he admitted.

“You talk to her,” Severus answered immediately. “Even a bone headed Gryffindor like you should have been able to figure that one out.”

Severus knew he shouldn’t have said it, but man did it feel good.

“Don’t you think I’ve tried? You were here in the kitchen that day, you saw how well we managed to talk. She won’t tell me. Whatever this big dark secret is of hers, she won’t let me in on it. I’m not good enough to know, apparently,” he said bitterly and Severus calmed down.

Bill wasn’t trying to hurt her, he was trying to be closer to her. But her parents were a wedge between them, driving deeper and deeper.

Severus sat down and took a deep breath. Severus knew that he would have to face his own demons to help the redhead figure this out. And Solarin would be furious with him, but he knew that it was for the best. If it meant that the two of them would talk once more, it was worth her fury.

“Do you know that I raised Sol?” Severus asked.

“Yes. She told me when we were younger that she was raised by her brother. I didn’t know it was you at the time,” Bill confirmed.

“What do you know of our parents?”

Bill looked at him in surprise. He gave a hollow laugh. “All I know is that, at some point, you had them. She never talks about them. I mean nothing, I don’t even know their names.”

“Eileen was our mother and Tobias was our father,” Severus supplied immediately and Bill nodded, grasping that Severus might be about to reveal everything Solarin couldn’t.

Severus studied the younger man. He looked about as good as Solarin did. There were dark circles under his eyes and he looked to be in pain. He was paler than usual, it made his freckles stand out, and his hair was messy and lank.

He took a deep steadying breath and gulped down the last of his whisky before he spoke again. “Bill, our father killed our mother. He stabbed her with a broken bottle. Sol watched it.”

Bill’s jaw dropped and he looked like he was going to be sick but he didn’t. He just sat there looking at the Potions Master, waiting.

“Sol was four. I wasn’t there, I arrived as the police did. Sol watched our father murder our mother. Before that, when we were young, our father was an alcoholic. He hated magic and used violence to keep us in line. He battered Solarin for the first four years of her life. He died in prison.”

“Why would he do that to her?” Bill whispered. He looked like he was about to dig up their father and kill him again so Severus poured him a whisky and pressed it into his hands before he answered.

“Because Sol is an augur. She was walking through dreams and performing magic well beyond your skill when she was two. He didn’t like it, so he tried to beat it out of her. It is not so dissimilar to the Dursley’s thinking when it came to Harry, though they never went to the extremes of my father, and for that I am sure we are all grateful.”

Bill gulped down the whole glass of alcohol before he spoke again.

“Why couldn’t she tell me? I love her, I would have understood. She could have told me. Why didn’t she?”

“No, you wouldn’t have understood,” he said and Bill looked like he wanted to argue with him but he held up his hand and the curse breaker fell silent. “Bill, no matter how stretched your parents were with seven of you, they did, in fact, love you. Our father never loved us, or at the least we never saw any evidence of it, and our mother was always too afraid to stand up to him. You had wonderful, loving parents who never hit each other. You never had to watch your mother being beaten by your father. You didn’t wake up to the smell of alcohol every morning. You didn’t watch your mother murdered. You cannot possibly comprehend what Sol’s first few years were like. That is why she could not tell you. You had a wonderful family and she had a broken one. She trusts you. She really does. She just didn’t know how to tell you.”

Bill nodded and Severus poured him another whisky. “How do I fix this?” Bill asked.

“I do not know. All I know is that now you are informed. There are no more secrets between you. Where you go from here is up to you. You love each other. That is as good a place as any to begin.”

Severus stood up and quietly left the room, leaving Bill to work through what he had revealed. He knew that he hadn’t gone into details, not real ones, but he just couldn’t. It had been hard enough to reveal what he had.

He made his way back to bed and curled himself around Harry, burying his head in his neck.

“Are you okay?” Harry whispered into the dark, running his hands along the slim arms wrapped around his waist, his husbands head pushed into his neck.

“No,” Severus muttered. Despite himself, tears began to fall as memories crept in.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“It’s about my parents,” Severus replied and Harry didn’t say anything. Severus didn’t explain further, he didn’t have to. Not to Harry. Harry knew it was not a topic to discuss.

Harry rolled over, pulled him close and let him cry, let him hold him, so tight he couldn’t move. But Harry didn’t complain at the crushing hold. Harry simply kissed his tears and smoothed his hair, whispering sweet reassurances to him. Once Severus was able to breathe properly, and able to loosen his hold slightly, Harry slipped from the bed and returned with a sleeping Miri. He put her into Severus’ arms and curled around them, the infant settled between her parents bodies. Harry wrapped his hands around the back of Severus’ neck and kissed him, deep and comforting, driving away any thoughts of the past.

It was this that made Severus love him so much. It was the fact that he didn’t have to explain to Harry what had happened with his parents. It was that Harry understood that it was too hard to go into detail. It was that Harry understood how much he needed him. Harry knew exactly what to do, what to say, to make it better.

Severus loved Harry because Harry could save him from himself.

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Harry watched with interest as Bill cautiously approached Solarin. It had been three days since Severus had revealed the truth to the curse breaker, and the once flawless couple had still to talk.

Bill had attempted several times to apologise but so far Solarin had managed to scare him off. Harry wondered if he would actually manage it today. It was different today, as he was doing it with everyone as a witness. All the house’s inhabitants were gathered around the table, enjoying each others company after a dinner cooked by Molly. The Weasley matriarch had taken to cooking all meals as a show of gratitude for the safe haven Sirius and Remus had given her family. Harry was distracted from the now familiar scene by his daughter.

Miri was babbling away happily to Hermione, who was holding her, perched on her bump. Hermione was only a week away from her due date and Harry was looking forward to there being a little playmate for Miri. Hermione seemed to be nervous about her impending delivery and they were all doing their best to reassure her. So far, they weren’t having much luck.

Ron reached over and tickled Miri’s bare feet and she shrieked, kicking out in protest. She whimpered and Harry retrieved her from his friends, Ron looking apologetic for his forgetfulness, and walked around with her to try and soothe her offended sensibilities, murmuring soothing words. She hated having her feet touched so much that Harry often had trouble getting socks onto her. He was just thankful that it was a sweltering day. Miri was dressed only in a vest and still she was over warm.

Severus came over to them and recast the weak cooling charm on her, easing her discomfort slightly.

“Solarin, can we talk?” Bill asked. The augur spun round from the sink where she was scrubbing dishes by hand and glared at him. Her eyebrow raised slightly and Harry considered it the only thing she was going to give to tell Bill to continue.

“I’m sorry,” Bill said softly. “I’m sorry for what I’ve said to you.”

Harry took a few steps back as she spoke, her voice was that full of venom. He backed up into Severus’ chest and his husband’s hands came to rest on his shoulders.

“You’re sorry? Sorry for which part? The part where you called me a heartless bitch? Or maybe the one where you claimed that I was completely selfish? How about the comment about who I may have fucked while in the Muggle World? I believe for that one you referred to me as a whore,” she snarled. “Which one in particular are you apologising for this time?”

“All of it. Everything. I didn’t mean it,” he said steadily.

“If you didn’t mean it, why did you say it?”

“Because I was angry. And if I remember correctly, you gave as good as you got. Just putting that out there, not angling for another fight,” he put in quickly. She looked like she was about to hit him again, but apart from the slap across the face in the kitchen that day, Solarin had not raised her hand again. Harry had the suspicion that she was ashamed of herself for it.

“So, what is it that you want from me? Because if this is about me not telling you again, you can fuck off now,” she said flatly.

“I wanted to tell you that I don’t need you to tell me.”

“Oh, so you’ve finally given up then?” she said, her eyes narrowed in suspicion.

“It’s not giving up. I know, Arin.”

Severus guided Harry back to his seat and whispered in his ear to stay there. Severus moved back to the middle of the room, leaving himself in an open space. He looked guilty and Harry realised that whatever Bill now knew, Severus must have been the one to tell him. Solarin would go ballistic.

“Know what?” she asked slowly.

“I know what happened to your parents. I know why you won’t talk about them.”

The room was deathly silent and Harry could literally feel Severus shrinking back as Solarin turned to him.

“Who told you?” she asked Bill, her eyes fixed on her brother, her voice low and calm. It was the same dangerous tone that Scary Professor Snape had when Harry was in trouble in potions and Harry felt himself shrink back slightly out of pure habit.

“Arin…” Bill began.

“Who?”

Bill hung his head in defeat but Severus saved him from her wrath.

“I did,” Severus answered. “I told him.”

Harry was impressed by Severus managing not to piss himself. She was positively terrifying. She advanced on the Potions Master slowly, like a predator. Her eyes were dark and cold, and she was tensed, ready to strike. Severus took a few steps back until he was pressed against the wall. She was well inside his personal space now, and even though her head didn’t even reach his shoulder, she still looked absolutely petrifying.

“What gave you the right to do that?” she asked, looking up at him. “What gave you the right to interfere?”

“I was trying to help,” Severus answered. “You didn’t know how to tell him, so I did it. I did what I thought was best.”

“In what twisted way is that best? Best for who? For me? Or for you?”

“For you.”

“No, you did this for you. You did this because you’re a control freak. You can’t stand the thought that I might not need you to help. I told you to go away that night. You didn’t because you just have to know. You have to have your hooked nose in everything.”

“I did this because he made you happy and I wanted you to have that once more,” Severus argued. Harry was shocked by how abusive she was being to him. He had thought she had never been mean like this in her whole life. From his husbands reaction, he was starting to understand that she lashed out when she lost control, when she was hurting.

“It was none of your business.”

“You are my sister, I was trying to take care of you,” Severus placated. Well, from his tone he was trying to placate. But it seemed to be some kind of trigger. Solarin backed up, her hands held to her temples, her eyes closed. She let out a kind of bitter half laugh as her eyes snapped open. Her hands fell and hit her thighs.

“Don’t you get it? I don’t need you to take care of me anymore! I can take care of myself!” she screamed at him, waving her hands at him. She looked around at the rest of the people in the room. Her eyes landed on Harry and Severus’ own black orbs filled with fear. “Well, maybe this is the point where I should ask if you’ve told Harry everything. So, Snivellus, have you?”

“Solarin, don’t do this,” Severus begged, ignoring the insult to his name, and Harry wanted her to stop but he couldn’t speak. He felt himself scared of what might happen if he voiced protest, and afraid of what she might say if he didn’t.

“Oh, I take that as a no. Well, don’t you think he should know? Don’t you think that, as your sister, I should tell him? After all, I’m only doing it because I care, because I want to take care of you,” she asked mockingly.

“I have told him all he needs to know,” Severus said calmly. “He doesn’t need you to reveal details.”

“And what did you reveal on my behalf?” she asked. “Come on, I want to know.”

“I told him what happened to mum. I told him what dad was like when we were young. I told him why I was the one to raise you,” Severus reeled off and Solarin looked at him with cold eyes.

She stared at him for the longest two minutes Harry could ever remember. It was like waiting for an explosion or something. And then she seemed to wilt in on herself. She closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around her waist as her head dropped. Severus moved forwards and touched her shoulder lightly but she pushed him away.

“I don’t want to talk to you right now. I don’t want to talk to any of you,” she said shakily. They all watched as she left the room, and then heard the front door close.

A shocked silence followed her departure and Severus heaved a sigh of relief.

“The last time she took me on like that I ended up in the hospital wing for three days,” Severus said as he sat down next to Harry, trembling slightly. “That was rather tame by her standards.”

“That was tame?” Ron asked in disbelief. “At one point I felt sure she was going to kill someone or something.”

“Trust me, Mr Weasley, that was tame.”

Bill was standing uncertainly by the sink. “Should I go after her?” he asked.

“No,” Severus said firmly. “Leave her be. When a new situation that she doesn’t know how to deal with arises, she sulks. She goes off for a while by herself to try and figure it out. She’ll come back when she’s ready.”

“I shouldn’t have said anything,” Bill said guiltily as he sat down. Severus shook his head.

“You said what you thought was appropriate at that particular moment. She was going to discover my involvement sooner or later. Just be thankful she didn’t remember her wand during that little display,” Severus soothed.

Harry could feel Severus shaking beside him, and he looked pale. He eased himself from his chair and into Severus’ lap. The slim arms came around him and Severus kissed his neck, stroking Miri’s curls.

They all sat there in silence, waiting.

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Moody didn’t usually spend a lot of time in his house. He had retired a few years ago, but he was still called into the Ministry on a regular basis. The younger Aurors benefited from his experience and he felt that it was his duty to educate them. He usually spent his nights in Enchantment, teaching the younger witches and wizards what to look out for on a night out.

As stated, Moody didn’t usually spend a lot of time in his house. But tonight he had actually made it home in time to eat a dinner he cooked for himself. The weather had cooled to a nice summer evening. He had just settled into his favourite armchair by the fireplace with a good book when he heard the crack of Apperation outside his door. He grabbed his wand and trained it on the door.

The mystery person knocked.

If it was someone coming to kill him, they wouldn’t knock.

He got unsteadily to his feet and clunked over to the door. He peered through his spy hole and opened it to expose a shaken looking Solarin.

“I’m sorry, I know it’s late and I probably put you on red alert with the Apperation. It’s just I’ve been walking around for a few hours and I didn’t know where else to go,” she explained, her voice hoarse and quiet.

He stepped back and ushered her in. He sat her down in his favourite chair and handed her a glass of amber liquid. He took the seat opposite her and waited.

“I can’t drink alcohol,” she mumbled, trying to give him back the glass.

“Trust me, you can handle it. It’s only one, and it’s muggle brandy. It won’t damage your control like wizarding liquors, not one small drink. You look like you need one before you reveal to me what happened,” Moody argued. She nodded and gulped it down, wincing at the taste. She coughed at the burning it caused and handed him back his glass. “Now, what happened?”

She looked at him and he could see that she was debating the wisdom of keeping it a secret from him. If she didn’t want to tell him, he wouldn’t push it, but he doubted she would keep it from him. He had fair helped Severus to raise her. No little girl lied to one of her parents when things were as bad as they appeared to be.

Solarin looked about twelve again as she curled up in his chair and rested her head on her knee. Her hair fell down around her shoulders and Moody could remember the time she had accidentally lost control and set it on fire. He and Severus had been forced to cut it to a severe bob.

“Severus told Bill about mummy and daddy,” she whispered and he sighed. As issues go, the one of her parents was a doosy.

“Why did he tell him?”

“Because I couldn’t. Me and Bill weren’t doing so good. He was trying to help. And when I found out I went a bit mad.”

“How mad?” he asked, knowing just how well her temper could get the best of her.

“I said some things to Sev. Things I shouldn’t have said,” she replied and Moody didn’t need her to elaborate. He knew how much of a big mouth she had when she lost control of her artistic temperament.

Moody sat there in silence. Dumbledore, with Severus’ permission, had informed him of Eileen and Tobias when he had first agreed to train Solarin. Moody had insisted on knowing all the facts before he took her on, so Dumbledore had given them to him. Moody was well aware that the truth of Solarin and Severus’ childhoods was something only a few select people knew of.

And for Severus to tell Weasley of it willingly, that displayed an acceptance of the young man as the one who made the augur happy.

“Severus will forgive you. He always has. He knows you too well to take anything you throw out during a fit of temper to heart. Just apologise to him,” Moody instructed.

She nodded and Moody was well aware that she was about to reveal the real reason for her wandering around alone in the middle of the night. It was the way she worked.

“How do I face Bill now?” she whispered, looking him in the eye for the first time that night. Her eyes were full of sadness and worry.

“Bill loves you. If he didn’t he wouldn’t have wanted to know so badly that Severus had to tell him. You just talk to him.”

She snorted. “We haven’t been doing too well with the whole talking thing lately.”

“I’m betting your temper hasn’t helped things.”

She shook her head.

“Sol,” Moody said. “You just talk to him. Talk and listen, and try to keep your temperament calm.”

She nodded and smiled at him. “Can I stay here tonight?” she asked.

“Course. You know where the spare room is,” he agreed. It wasn’t the first time she had needed a place to cool off.

She nodded and kissed him on the cheek before she made her way up the stairs.

Moody felt like he was getting soft in his old age. But he knew that she got under his skin, she always had.

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Bill lay in his and Solarin’s bed alone. Severus had insisted that he stay and he hadn’t had the strength to refuse.

Tears poured down his face yet he didn’t wipe them away. He couldn’t feel the connection anymore and it was tearing him apart. In all his life he had never loved anyone but her. She was all he had ever wanted, ever. He had never even looked at another woman. There were no fantasies about famous witches in his imaginings, there never had been. Only her. Only Solarin.

And now he had lost her.

That wasn’t the only reason for his tears. He kept picturing her as a little girl, running in fear. He couldn’t help it, it just kept creeping in. And with it came anger. The thought of someone hurting his beautiful fiery girl made his blood boil. And to think that it was her own father, well, he could hardly comprehend it. How could a father do that to their child? How could her father do that to her, her who was so special?

[Bill.]

He sat bolt upright as her voice floated softly into his head.

[Bill, can you hear me?] she asked, her voice becoming stronger.

[I can hear you, though it’s faint,] he pushed back through the connection. [Where are you? Are you all right? I’m so sorry, baby. I am so very sorry.]

[Hush, it’s all right. I understand. I’m at Moody’s, I’m all right. My voice is faint because the connection is weak. It’s getting stronger now,] she explained, but he ignored it.

[No, it’s not all right. I never should have said any of those things to you. I was so far out of line I couldn’t even see the line anymore. And I shouldn’t have pushed it. I should have left it alone. I am so sorry, Arin.]

He could feel her smiling softly and he let out a breath he hadn’t known he had been holding.

[I should have told you,] she said quietly, and he knew it was only her uncertainty that made her quiet and not a weakening of the connection again.

[No, it was your business and I should have been patient. I should have respected your privacy. I’m sorry.]

He could feel her hesitation. [I’m sorry I hit you,] she whispered and he sent a mental hug through to her.

[You were angry. I forgive you,] he said and she mentally smiled shakily at him.

He wanted to comfort her, but he didn’t know how. So he did the only thing he could think of: he was honest.

[Is it true? Did your father really hurt you?] he asked and he felt her nausea.

[Yes.] she replied and paused, gathering herself. He stayed silent, waiting. [I can’t put it into words, it’s too hard. But I want you to know, I always have, I just couldn’t...I can show you, though. I can show you my memories.]

Bill hesitated. Here it was, all the things he ever wanted to know about her, offered to him on a plate, and yet…he wasn’t sure he wanted to know anymore. Severus’ explanations had been bad enough. He wasn’t sure what was worse. Her not showing him and having to live with his own imaginings? Or her letting him see everything and having to watch what had been done to her?

[Are the memories bad?] he asked.

[I don’t know. I lived them, so I’m pretty much used to them. Some of them are bad. I don’t know what you’ll think, your parents love you. If you don’t want to see them, I can keep them hidden,] she offered.

[I’m not sure what’s worse, what is real or what I imagine,] he admitted.

She was silent, waiting and he could feel her hurt through the connection. It was stronger now, almost as if the last few weeks had never happened.

[Are you sure you want to show me?] he asked, making up his mind. He would rather know than wonder.

[Yes. I’m ready to now. If you want me to share it, I can now.] She smiled at him in his mind. [I love you, Bill, don’t you love me too?]

He laughed out loud, the ache that had seemed to take up permanent residence in his chest disappearing as she asked the oh so familiar question.

[I love you, Arin. All my heart and soul.]

She mentally giggled.

[I want to see, but not now. I want to see when we’re together,] he said.

[Okay.]

[When we’ve made up properly…] he said lewdly and he could feel her blush.

[I like that plan. I’ll be home tomorrow. I’m going to close the connection now, while I sleep.]

[All right. I’ll see you tomorrow.]

[Goodnight,] she whispered sleepily.

[Goodnight.]

And with that she was gone. Bill fell back onto his pillow and fell into the first night of actual sleep he had had in a long time.

They were going to be okay. They were together.

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Severus looked up from his breakfast to see Solarin floo in with Moody close behind her. She locked eyes with him and he stood up, making his way over to her. Every eye in the full room was on the two of them, waiting.

“I’m sorry,” she said gently, her eyes downcast, obviously embarrassed of her behaviour. “I shouldn’t have gone off at you like that. You didn’t deserve it. You were only trying to help. I’m sorry, Sevus.”

He pulled her into his arms. “It’s all right. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you that I had informed him,” he said softly.

“So, I guess were both sorry, huh?”

“And that makes us both forgiven,” Severus said and she smiled. She pulled back and kissed him on the cheek. “I am glad that you didn’t land me in the hospital this time, though.”

“I could still choose to do that,” she said lightly, winking at him. Just like that, it was all forgotten. The two of them were like that, fought like cat and dog and yet all it took was one little apology and it was all ancient history.

Severus smirked and returned to his breakfast. He dropped his fork as Bill embraced her tightly, the two of them smiling at each other. He leaned in to Harry. “Did I miss something?” he asked his husband, confusion and disbelief written across his face as the two of them kissed as if nothing had ever happened between them.

Harry smiled at him. “The connection,” Harry supplied, taking a bite of his bagel. Harry, for once, had his hands free. Sirius was holding Miri, talking to her, giving Harry the chance to actually use both hands to eat. Remus was looking uncertainly at the little girl. Remus looked exhausted, but had insisted joining them all for breakfast. It was the day of the waning moon, the third and final day that he would be forced to transform come moonrise. The change took it’s toll on Remus’ human body.

“Ah. I forgot about that,” Severus admitted.

“Understandable. You thought she’d be gone for a few days. She didn’t even do 24 hours. You’re just too busy being relieved that she didn’t render you unconscious yesterday,” Harry joked.

“You know me so well,” Severus muttered, nibbling the ear he had been whispering into. Harry shivered.

“Severus?”

“Yes?”

“How long is it now since I had Miri?” Harry asked and Severus pulled away. His brow furrowed in concentration.

“Seven weeks. You and Hermione were eight weeks apart in your estimated due dates and she reached a week remaining yesterday. Why?” Severus asked him interestedly.

Harry leaned close and kissed him, slipping his lips down to rest by his ear.

“Because I’ve stopped bleeding,” Harry whispered.

Severus pulled back and gazed into those green eyes that took his breath away. Harry was smiling shyly. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, I stopped a few days ago. I was waiting to tell you so I could be sure I had truly stopped. And I’m not sore anymore.”

God, Severus had lost track of how long it had been since they had last made love. Harry giving birth and a brand new baby had claimed their attention. He hadn’t even touched himself since Harry delivered. He had attempted it, once, but it had felt wrong. He knew his pleasure belonged to his husband and him alone. It was not something he was familiar with in a nice sense. When he had been a slave of Voldemort, he had known that he was only allowed pleasure at the Dark Lord’s discretion. To now know that he only wanted to gain his pleasure for Harry to enjoy had confused him at first, but now he was relaxed with it. He was the sole giver of Harry’s pleasure, it seemed only fair that his belonged to Harry.

More than a month had passed since they had enjoyed each other, he was sure of that. He had a suspicion it wasn’t more than two, but he couldn’t be positive. He had missed it, and he knew Harry had too, Harry had told him that. The mere thought of it, of being able to show Harry how much he loved him, of being able to pleasure him, of hearing those breathy cries once more. It made him begin to remember their first time, it made him think about pale skin under his hands, it made him want to pull Harry upstairs right that second…it made him hard. Christ, he was sitting at the breakfast table with a tent in his trousers. And Harry’s hand on his thigh as he leaned close was not helping. He was behaving no better than a hormonal teenager.

“The last time was…” Severus pondered out loud. It was a little hard for him to concentrate as he was trying to will his erection away.

“The kitchen counter, two weeks before I had Miri. So that makes it nine weeks,” Harry supplied, offering that shy smile again.

“Has it really been that long?” Severus asked in surprise and Harry giggled softly. Before their abstinence because of Harry’s discomfort and then the after effects of a difficult birth, they had made love daily. Several times daily. Severus hadn’t realised it had truly been more than two months.

“Yes. So, can we? Tonight?” Harry asked.

Severus considered it. “I’ll have to examine you, love. Just to make sure you are indeed healed properly,” Severus admitted, managing to hide his regret at the thought of maybe having to wait any longer, and Harry nodded, though his eyes were a little disappointed. “If you are, then we can.”

Harry grinned at him and Severus pulled him in for a sweet kiss, full of promises of later.

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Solarin perched on Bill’s lap during lunch, and she couldn’t in all good conscience say she minded. It felt good to be like this with him again, so she wasn’t about to complain. No one had seemed to mind, not even Severus. Molly had even smiled at them fondly as they fed each other.

After lunch, Remus brought down the papers they had on Lucius and they started to go through them, the other members of the house offering their suggestions as they discussed options. Solarin and Remus had decided that maybe brainstorming with the group may help them piece it all together. So far, it wasn’t really working. It didn’t help that half the information they needed they were unable to get hold of. It made the jigsaw a little more difficult.

She remained on Bill’s lap as he didn’t seem inclined to let go of her any time soon.

“So, you’ve managed to gather that there are dowries involved?” Arthur asked.

“Yes. According to this,” she said as she held up a few pieces of parchment. “It says that if a male Malfoy heir marries then the bride’s family must provide a dowry. That dowry goes into the Malfoy vaults. Now, if a female Malfoy heir marries then the current Lord Malfoy at that point must pay a dowry to the bride’s family.” She looked at their confused faces. “For example, if Draco marries Pansy, her father pays Lucius a sum of money, that’s what a dowry usually is: money. If Draco had a sister that Lucius had claim over, then it would be the other way around. If she married, Lucius would have to pay his father a dowry. Everyone with me?”

They all nodded.

“There is something odd though,” Remus said. “The Malfoy vaults seem to be empty.”

“Empty?” Draco asked.

“Yes. There is nothing in them. Well, almost nothing. According to this statement, dated about a year ago, there is less than one hundred galleons, spread across the five vaults. There are no valuables, no jewellery. It seems odd.”

“Very odd. My mother used to splash money around like it was going out of fashion,” Draco supplied. “And my father paid a hell of a lot to keep himself out of Azkaban. I know that my grandfather had a gambling problem, but it’s never really been spoken of in any great detail, so I always assumed that it was a small thing.”

“It might explain the lack of funds. A gambler never really realizes that they’re in trouble until they’re in too deep.” Solarin peered at Draco and then down at the papers. “Have you had any luck getting your mother to talk to us?” she asked the blonde.

“No. All my letters keep getting sent back unopened. I don’t think she’s going to help us,” Draco said sadly, looking down at the table and picking at the wood with his nails.

Charlie leaned in and rested his head on Draco’s shoulder. Draco was perched on Charlie’s lap, the redhead describing things to him. “I’m hugging you, resting my head on your shoulder,” Charlie muttered and Draco nodded, smiling briefly at him.

Solarin smiled fondly at them, but she did give Charlie a warning look. The dragon tamer grinned cheekily at her. She really had become very motherly over Draco since his father took everything. “Is it me, or does it feel like we’re missing something?” she asked.

“Well, Miri was supposed to be a boy, right?” Harry asked.

“Yes. She’s a little miracle,” Remus said, making Harry smile briefly.

“Well, if she had been a boy, and Lucius had managed to keep me, couldn’t he have collected the dowry from the bride if Miri married?”

“Yes.”

“Wouldn’t that have brought him more money?”

Solarin laughed. “No way. This whole thing can’t be about money. That’s too simple,” she said incredulously.

“Perhaps you should be looking at the simple. Perhaps we all should,” Severus suggested as he paced with Miri. The tiny girl had trapped wind and he was trying to ease her. She was whimpering and wriggling in his arms and he held her over his shoulder, patting her back. She burped and Severus smiled. “That’s daddy’s girl,” he praised. She babbled as he sat down with her, sitting her on the table, her back against his chest. Her bright eyes darted around them as Severus bounced her hands on her legs.

“So this could all be about money? What he did to Harry could all be about money?” Ron asked disbelievingly, his voice tinged with rising anger.

Harry looked up at the tone. He was sat with Hermione between his legs, the two of them straddling a low bench, Harry massaging her sore back. She had insisted that he did it, and he had agreed immediately. He saw it as his way to thank her for the ice pack suggestion that had eased his suffering so well.

“Calm down, Ron,” Harry soothed, hoping to placate his friend. He knew Ron was still feeling guilty. Over what he couldn’t be certain, though. There were several possibilities. There was him telling Severus about his periods, and the wedding going ahead without Harry at everyone’s insistence for a happy day to ease their worries, or it might have been because Ron was suddenly living at Grimmauld Place. Hermione had told him that Ron felt like he was intruding or something. Ron’s guilt, whatever it was about at that particular moment, made him very protective over Harry and Miri. It would have been sweet if it didn’t lead to outbursts so often.

“Calm down? That bastard did bad things to you and it might be about money! I can’t calm down!” Ron argued. It briefly amused Harry that Ron referred to his imprisonment as ‘bad things’. It was quite a nice way of putting it.

“Ron, look at it this way. If he hadn’t done bad things to me I wouldn’t have Miri. And I probably never would have worked up the nerve to tell Severus how I felt. So, really, when you look at it in terms of all the good things I have now, I can’t really hate him. Without his bad things I wouldn’t have the good things,” Harry reasoned. He knew he was lying, and he knew by the look that Severus was giving him that he knew it too, but he didn’t know what else to say to pacify Ron. He hated Lucius, no matter how much he loved Miri and Severus, no matter how thankful he was for all the good things in his life. In his mind, Lucius had done nothing good for him. In his mind, Miri was Severus’ daughter. He hated Lucius, no matter what he said.

But it seemed to work. Ron quieted and they went back to discussing what the missing piece might be.

“I think we’re getting off the subject. We’re trying to figure out what’s wrong with Draco, not how Miri came to be,” Sirius said firmly, staring down at the little girl reaching forwards, apparently trying to get to the salt shaker without success. She was definitely an inquisitive little witch. She couldn’t even hold her own head up properly yet. They could all see that he didn’t like discussing Miri’s conception and immediately latched on to the suggested way of thinking.

“It could be that, that Lucius wanted more money, but I don’t see how that connects to Draco’s symptoms,” Solarin said. “If only I could remember where I’ve seen a mind like his before this would be so much easier.”

“Still no luck?” Molly asked.

“No. The most I can get is that I was at Hogwarts when I did it and that I only saw it at a glance.”

“Why doesn’t that help?” Draco asked.

“Because I glanced a lot of minds at Hogwarts. It could be anyone I went to school with,” Solarin explained. “I can say one thing for sure, though. The magical signature on the wall is not Voldemort’s.”

They all stared at her in surprise, a few of them shuddering at the name. “How do you know?” Sirius asked.

“Because she can only identify magical signatures she has encountered before, wizards and witches she has met. She never met, as Harry calls him, the Snake King,” Severus supplied, gripping Miri more securely as she pitched forwards.

They all sniggered. “Well, that’s a plus, right?” Charlie asked.

“Definitely a plus, but it doesn’t really help us much,” Remus supplied.

“Maybe you could try letting someone into your head,” Harry suggested, attacking a particularly knotted spot on Hermione’s back. “Maybe if someone else could see the mind you kind of remember they might know who it is.”

“It’s a nice idea, Harry, but it wouldn’t work. No one could recognise what I see when I’m in someone’s head. I’m the only one who can do what I do. To anyone else, a mind would make no sense. I tried bringing Bill with me into a mind once. All he saw was a rush of colour,” Solarin explained. “It was a good idea in theory though.”

They all continued to toss around theories until Tonks flooed in with the Twins. The three of them were supposed to be helping with the decorating of the room next to Ron and Hermione’s. They were converting it into a nursery for Hermione’s baby. They were due to start decorating tomorrow morning and the three newcomers had opted to stay for the night. They were all hankering for Molly’s cooking and wanted to fuss over Miri.

As soon as Tonks entered the kitchen, Solarin jumped up and slapped a hand to her head. They all stared at her, wondering if she had gone insane, and Miri giggled.

“Oh my God!” she screamed. “It’s Tonks!”

“I’m happy to see you too, Solly, but I don’t think it merits such an excited response,” Tonks said.

They all laughed and Solarin grabbed Bill’s arm. “No! The mind like Draco’s, it’s Tonks!”

They all gaped at her. “Are you sure?” Remus asked.

“Yes. When we did the McGonagall prank, I glanced into her mind. There was a wall in it, just like in Draco’s. Severus was right, it is so simple that we completely overlooked it. It’s a concealment!” she explained.

“Are you saying that what’s wrong with me is a spell?” Draco said.

“Yes. What Tonks does is simply a concealment. It’s a really good one, one that no one could do but a metamorphmagus. But in principle it’s just a concealment,” Solarin clarified. “Draco is under a concealment charm. That’s what the symptoms are. If I’m right, then it’s all falling into place. No concealment charm is meant to be left in place for more than a year, two at the most. The wall in Draco’s mind has been there more than a decade, nearly two. It all fits. Theoretically, if a concealment charm were to be left in place as long as Draco’s had then it would start to cause physical problems for him.”

They all gaped at her. Could it be true? Could it be that simple? Could it be rectified?

“You could fix me?” Draco asked in a timid whisper. His eyes were wide and pleading, but there was fear there as well.

“If I’m right, we could fix you. All it would take is one little potion,” Solarin said.

A small tear slid down Draco’s face. He could be fixed. It could all be over.

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Bill rolled over to find himself alone in bed. Thinking he had dreamed of Solarin and he making things up he shot to his feet, looking around frantically.

[Window seat…] came the teasing amused voice into his head and he spun around, finding her watching him, smirking. She was wrapped in only a bed sheet, and there was a bright red love bite on her shoulder.

“Not funny,” he grumbled as he made his way over to her. She was smoking out of the window, the light of the full moon making her seem ethereal, her pale skin glowing.

“Remus’ howling keeping you up?” he asked lightly, settling himself opposite her and nicking one of her cigarettes.

“Sirius upped a silencing spell on the basement,” she reminded. Sirius and Remus had secured one of the basement rooms for Remus’ monthlies, as Sirius called them, and Remus had secluded himself in it just before the sun set. He would emerge just after sunrise.

“Oh, right. Why are you up?” he asked as she conjured a flame in the palm of her hand for him to light his cigarette on.

“I was thinking.”

“Want to talk about it?” he asked cautiously.

“I was thinking about my mother,” she said easily and he froze. She had actually said the word mother to him. She had never done that before. She had always referred to them as ‘my parents’. She held out an open locket to him and he noticed that she was surrounded by photographs and an empty photo album. None of the pictures moved. He briefly reminded himself that Solarin liked them still. She said it forced her to use her memory instead on relying on the moving image.

“Is this her?” he asked as he looked at the stationary picture contained in the antique piece of jewellery. The woman had Solarin’s face but light honey brown eyes, much lighter than Solarin’s ebony orbs. Her hair was brown, a light honey brown. She looked sad.

“Yes. Eileen Prince-Snape. Severus gave me the locket the day of her funeral. It was hers. He has one just like it that belonged to her mother. I’ve always kept it with me, even at Hogwarts.”

“I remember. I asked you about it once and you said that it was a gift from your brother,” he said. They had been half naked and he had run his fingers over the ornate pattern.

“I distracted you with a blow job,” she giggled. “You didn’t stand a chance.”

“Well, you knew just how to manipulate me. Still do,” he agreed, leaning in and kissing her, running his hands along her bare porcelain legs. She didn’t pull away and he felt it was a good sign.

She picked up another photograph and handed it to him. The man in it looked vaguely like Severus, but harder, colder. Even at his scariest as a professor, Severus had never seemed that cold. His black hair was short and his black eyes seemed empty.

“Tobias Snape, my father, the man who murdered my mother,” she said. Her tone was angry and Bill could understand it. “He died in prison when I was eleven. It’s how we got Spinners End. It was given to us when he died. That’s the only picture I have of him. I don’t think Severus has a single picture of him, but I’m not sure.”

She looked at him, her eyes careful, as she retrieved the picture, letting it flutter to the floor. “Do you still want to know?” she asked.

This was it, his moment of truth. Did he? He looked into her deep dark eyes and felt certainty settle in his chest.

“I want to know, but only if you still want to show me,” he said quietly.

“I do,” she replied and he nodded. He felt her mind open to him, so that there was nothing between. They had under no circumstances ever dropped their barriers like this, not so they were completely bare. Not even in sleep or in their early days. He knew now that it had only been her reluctance to show him this that had kept them from becoming exposed. He nervously dropped his own barriers fully and gasped as the memories hit him.

She grabbed his cigarette as he pitched forwards and threw it out of the window with her own. She reached forwards and steadied him. He was panting and had broken out in a cold sweat. She held him as the memories flowed, and then closed her barriers as he received her last one.

He clutched at her and felt a sob make its way from his lips. God, the pain, the violence.

They all started to make sense in his head as they arranged themselves into some semblance of order.

She was eighteen months old, sitting in a living room, building a tower of bricks. Daddy was there, she wanted to play with him. He smelled bad, but he always did so she didn’t mind.

Solarin dropped her building block as her daddy advanced on her. He grabbed her arms and shook her, yelling that she was bad, that no baby should do things like that.

She didn’t understand. She wanted to play with him. Didn’t daddy like floating balls of light? Sevus liked them.

She didn’t understand what she had done wrong, why daddy had left marks on her arms and made her ribs hurt.

“Oh God,” he gasped out as another hit him.

She was two and a half and she had wanted to help mummy and daddy clean up after dinner. Sevus had gone to get some milk from the shop.

Solarin took off at a run as daddy stormed at her. The bottle had fallen, she didn’t mean to. The ketchup spilled its way across the white table cloth. Mummy added water to it, it was hard to get out of the bottle. Daddy hit her hard around the face and her eye hurt.

She ran, and daddy followed. He was so angry. He smelled bad again.

She fell and cut her knee. Sevus scooped her up and hid with her all night in the kitchen cupboard. That was how long it took for daddy to pass out. But her Sevus was there, holding her close. He cleaned up her knee and wiped away her tears.

Sevus told her she was special.

“No,” Bill sobbed.

She was a baby, still in the crib. Her room had been pink.

She gazed up at the rabbits, they were spinning. She could hear shouting, and then it hurt. It hurt all over and she didn’t understand. Why did it hurt?

She was screaming. Screaming in that way babies have that make it seem like the world is ending. It hurt and it wasn’t hers. No doctor had given her a needle. Why did it hurt?

And then he was there, the boy with the dark hair, the one that smiled. Sevus, mummy had called him. He picked her up and he sung to her and she couldn’t hear the yelling anymore.

“Sick fuck!” he ground out through clenched teeth as the worst one yet hit him.

She was four and they were going on an adventure. They were going to get Sevus and they were going far away. Daddy wasn’t coming. No, it was just the three of them because they were special.

They were by the river and daddy came. Solarin hurt him because he hurt mummy, but she wasn’t big enough to stop him. He was hurting her, all over.

And then mummy was on the ground, and daddy was holding a broken bottle.

“My babies are worth more to me than all the gold in Gringotts,” mummy said as she went to sleep and wouldn’t wake up.

Sevus hit daddy with his cast and daddy went into the river.

Sevus was carrying her away, and she was safe. He was her hero. He was her Sevus.

He breathed deep as the memories started to become easier, as they stated getting better. He only had to see one more, before she returned to his mind and pulled the brunt of them out. He only got one more clearly before she ended it.

She was ten and the Great Hall was so big. There were so many people, so many minds. It was like a party in her head. She sat down with her house and looked at the table in disgust. She could barely see over it. Her chin just rose above the wood. That wasn’t fair, everyone else could see over the table. They could even rest their elbows on it, though Sevus had taught her not to do that. One of the older girls helped her to sit on a big thick book, raising herself. She could reach the food now, even if her feet did dangle far from the ground.

She glanced all around the room, seeing Sevus and Albus sitting at the head table, looking down upon her. Albus was smiling gently and Sevus looked proud of her. She smiled at them and peeked across the room.

Fire.

That boys head was on fire. No, wait, it was his hair. And there was another one with that hair sitting just next to him. She had never seen hair that looked like fire. No one at Hogsmites had it. The other one had brown eyes and was short. But this one…his eyes were the brightest blue she had ever seen, and he was tall, like her Sevus. She could see it even though he was sitting down.

He was looking at her and she looked back. She focussed herself and peeked into his head. She knew she shouldn’t, but Sevus had told her that it was all right to be curious sometimes and it was just that one, just that boy.

‘She looks like a pretty porcelain doll.’

She smiled. He was thinking that he didn’t want her to get broken.

He would be the one who she would make friends with, the nice boy with the kind eyes and the hair of fire.

He could feel her in his head, taking back the memories, leaving echoes of them behind. She put his barriers back for him as she receded. He opened his eyes and looked into her dark ones. Now he knew. He knew everything, and he knew why Severus was her number one. Severus would always be her number one. And he had been stupid to think that he could ever take his place as top dog in her affections. He could never save her the way Severus had. But she loved him. She had wanted him in her life since her very first day at Hogwarts. It was enough, it was everything he had ever needed.

She was wiping his tears away, tears he hadn’t known he was crying.

“Are you all right?” she asked. She had not cried, but she looked sad.

“Yes. Are you?” he replied. She nodded. He didn’t question it further. Her memories had been so horrific to him. How could a father do that to his child?

“Now you know. Now you know everything and you know why I couldn’t tell you,” she said.

He leaned in and kissed her, deep and possessive.

[Mine. My porcelain doll. And I will never let you get broken.]

[Mine. My boy with the fire hair and the kind eyes.]

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Severus dried himself off from his shower and slipped into a pair of boxers. The thought of wearing anything more made him gasp. He didn’t even care about Sirius seeing him exposed. It was too damn hot. It wasn’t much cooler tonight than it had been during the day. Everyone in the house had walked around in vests and shorts, even Molly. He and Harry had been forced to dress Miri in nothing but a vest and to keep recasting cooling charms on her again. He hoped it would rain soon, that this heat wave would break.

He slipped into his room and stopped dead in the doorway. It was empty, and Miri’s basket was nowhere to be seen. He began to panic until he heard noises coming from Miri’s nursery.

He walked in to the dark room to see Harry standing by the crib, fiddling with an odd white device. It looked muggle.

“Harry? Where is Miri?” Severus asked and Harry shushed him.

He moved forwards at Harry’s beckoning and peered into the cot. Harry had placed the basket in it, and Miri was fast asleep, tucked up safely.

“Molly suggested that I put the basket in there with her. She said it would make it easier when it came time to move her in here properly,” Harry explained in a hushed whisper.

“Why are we trying it now? Miri doesn’t need to sleep in here for a few more weeks yet,” Severus asked.

Harry blushed. “I didn’t feel comfortable with the idea of her being in the room with us while we made love,” Harry mumbled. Severus smiled and kissed him. “I mean, I know we did it while I was pregnant, so she was technically in the room, but…”

Severus stopped him. “It’s all right, love. I understand. What is that odd thing in your hands?”

“It’s a baby monitor. The other one is in our room. Miri only whimpers, she never cries. With the baby monitor we can hear if she wakes up. Hermione had two, Ron went a bit mad when shopping, and she gave us one. Arthur messed with it for us. He charmed it to work without electricity,” Harry clarified.

Severus nodded and watched Miri sleep while Harry switched the monitor on and placed it on the chest of drawers. Harry entwined their fingers and led Severus from the nursery, led him to their room.

Harry lit a few candles on the chest of drawers before moving to the bed. He pulled Severus down and pinned him to the mattress, claiming his lips in a fiery kiss, their tongues duelling. Severus moaned, his hands playing along Harry’s back as he straddled him.

“Oh, Harry,” he breathed as Harry kissed at his throat. “Merlin, I’ve missed this.”

“Me too,” Harry replied. He stopped and looked Severus in the eye. “I want you to claim me. I want you to so badly.”

Severus smiled at Harry’s needy tone. “I want to, love, but I must examine you first. We need to be sure, Harry.”

Harry nodded and shed his boxers, laying back, nude except his bra. Severus couldn’t help it, he leaned forwards and kissed Harry’s shoulder, caressing his skin. Harry shivered. He pulled back and reached for the nightstand, pulling out the tube of lubricant. He looked at Harry in question and Harry nodded. He coated his fingers and smirked as Harry spread his legs wide for him; Harry was so eager.

Harry was already half hard, and it made Severus want to sink into that beautiful body once again, to make Harry cry out in desire. But he would never hurt Harry, so they had to be sure. He carefully eased his finger into Harry and felt his heart drop as Harry hissed and pulled away in pain. He sighed and removed his finger. They would not be joining tonight.

“Sorry, Severus, I know you wanted to tonight, and I got your hopes up. I thought I wasn’t sore anymore. It doesn’t hurt when I walk and sit down. Why does it hurt when you touch me?” Harry asked, disappointed.

“Because you are still healing. It’s all right, love. We’ll just have to wait a bit longer,” Severus soothed, using his wand to clean his hand. He crawled up and kissed Harry, trying to make him feel better. “It’s all right, I can wait. I won’t cause you any pain, so I will happily wait until you are ready. There is no rush, love, never any rush.”

“But I wanted it tonight. It’s not fair,” Harry complained, pouting.

“Sorry, love. We can’t, not while you’re this sore. I only eased one finger into you. Imagine how well you would handle my penis,” Severus reasoned. Harry huffed but he nodded. They lay there together for a while before Harry spoke once more.

“Can we do other things? I’ve stopped bleeding, so we can do other things, right?” Harry asked hopefully.

“We can,” Severus said with a grin. “Are you referring to what we did the morning after I claimed you?”

“Yes. And when I watched you touch yourself. And…” Harry trailed off.

Severus stayed silent, gazing into bright green eyes, waiting for Harry to tell him what he wanted.

“The first time, when you claimed me the first time, you asked if I wanted you to pleasure me with your hands or your mouth. What did you mean by your mouth?”

“I was referring to oral sex.”

Harry’s brow knitted in concentration. “Is that like what Dean and Seamus used to talk about?”

“What did they talk about?”

“They talked about something called giving head.”

Severus smiled. “Yes, it can also be referred to as giving head. It has many names. When performed on a man, it’s proper name is fellatio,” Severus clarified. It amused him, Harry’s innocence, and filled him with pride. He was the only one to have made Harry feel good, to make him moan and gasp in pleasure. It made him feel proud of himself. He adored watching Harry enjoy himself in the bedroom. Well, wherever Harry asked for it really. It entranced him that Harry would only ask him what these sexual things were, he knew that Harry would never ask anyone else. Harry kept it between them, private and wholly theirs.

“So, what is it? How do you pleasure someone with your mouth? I don’t understand,” Harry asked. He showed no hint of embarrassment at his lack of knowledge, he never did when he asked Severus about sex. Severus would explain, he wouldn’t ridicule the way his friends had teased Neville when he didn’t know.

“Well, oral sex is when you use your mouth to stimulate your partners genitals,” Severus explained carefully.

Harry’s face darkened. “Like what he did to me, when he forced it down my throat?” Harry whispered.

Severus kissed his cheek, holding him close. Severus knew not to get upset when Harry mentioned his rape, it was, after all, the only other sexual experiences he had apart from the ones he shared with Severus. It made sense that Harry would try and figure it out with what he already knew. Even if it did make Severus want to castrate Lucius.

“Kind of, Harry. It’s not meant to be like that, though,” Severus agreed. “It is meant to be a consensual experience, a nice one.”

Harry was silent and Severus didn’t push him. He just lay there with Harry cradled against his chest, waiting.

“Do I have to do it to you if I ask you to do it to me?” Harry whispered.

“No. Not at all. Not if it is something you are uncomfortable with,” Severus reassured.

“It’s enough for you to just have my hand?”

Severus pulled him away and looked deep into the emerald eyes filled with uncertainty. “Harry, whatever you want to give me tonight is up to you. If you don’t want to do anything, I understand. It is enough for me just to have you here with me. Everything else is an additional benefit,” Severus said, his voice firm but gentle. He gazed into the searching eyes and willed Harry to understand that he meant every word.

Harry nodded and kissed Severus, deep and scorching, letting Severus know he believed.

“Will you do it to me?” Harry asked against his lips.

“Is that what you want?”

“Yes. I want you to use your mouth.”

Severus smiled at him and kissed him again, rolling Harry to his back. He kissed Harry slowly, possessively, driving away any thought of Lucius with his lips. He nibbled on his bottom lip, making him squirm and tighten his fingers in his hair. Severus kissed his way down the smooth pale column of Harry’s throat, licking his pulse, sucking at his slight Adam’s apple.

“Severus, more,” Harry moaned, making Severus moan in response. God, he had missed that pretty plea.

He continued down, scraping his teeth along a shoulder, ghosting fingers over his breastbone. He was careful not to touch Harry’s breasts, they were still tender. In light of not being able to devote himself to them, Severus kissed Harry’s ribs, making Harry giggle. Severus looked up in surprise.

“It is just this one rib that’s ticklish?” Severus asked, barely managing to hide his smile of delight. He tickled the rib.

“Yes,” Harry admitted, squirming and giggling.

Severus grinned, stilling his teasing fingers. “I can’t believe I’ve only just discovered that. I thought it was all of them. You’re just full of surprises, my sweet little Gryffindor.”

Harry grinned at him and Severus returned to his exploration of the pale skin beneath him. He had to admit, he wasn’t quite sure how to pleasure Harry orally. Harry had both male and female genitals, and he only had one mouth. He decided to figure it out when he got to it.

He kissed his way down the flat stomach, caressing the slight curves with his fingertips. They were easy to miss if you didn’t know what Harry was. Actually, you could miss the curves if he was wearing clothes. But Severus knew. And he knew how much Harry loved gentle caresses over them. Harry moaned, arching his back to push his stomach towards Severus. Severus grinned and dipped his tongue into Harry’s navel, making Harry gasp.

“Do you like that?” Severus asked and Harry nodded. “Would you like more?”

“Please,” Harry replied. He knew Severus was teasing him, he always did when Lucius was mentioned in the bedroom, and Harry revelled in it. It made his mind turn off, made him forget that little bit faster. Severus dipped his tongue again and Harry just couldn’t think. All he could do was feel.

Severus carefully pushed the thin thighs apart and settled himself between them on his stomach. His feet dangled off the end of the bed but he didn’t mind. He had wanted to taste Harry for so long. It was finally his chance.

Harry was rock hard now, his erection jutting out proudly and Severus stroked the inside of his thighs as he figured out how to do this. He licked the tip of it and Harry cried out in surprise.

“Are you sure you want me to do this?” Severus asked.

“Yes,” Harry breathed. “Oh please, Severus. Please.”

Good answer, but Severus knew Harry wasn’t quite as needy as he usually got. Not yet. He hadn’t said it.

Severus licked a slow steady strip along the underside of Harry’s cock before taking his head into his mouth and his hips bucked. Severus chuckled and moved a hand to Harry’s lower abdomen, holding him down for the time being.

Severus scraped his teeth lightly against the sensitive skin and Harry attempted to buck once more, growling at the restrictions. Severus pulled back and stared up at his lover. His lithe body was practically glowing with the light sheen of sweat, and his head was thrown back in pleasure, his hands raking through his hair. His full, kiss swollen lips were parted in wonder at the new experience. Beautiful, so beautiful.

Severus considered the task at hand. Harry was incredibly sore still, so he would have to avoid teasing his entrance. He smiled as it clicked in his head, the appropriate way to make Harry scream in pleasure, and Severus set about his feast like a man on a mission.

He sucked the head, swirling his tongue around it. Harry’s hands came down to tangle in his hair. He took his sweet time, slowly taking more and more of Harry in, the fingers tightening.

It hit the back of his throat and he growled. There were still inches left, far too much for him to take in, even if he did have Harry slide down his throat. He had known Harry was well endowed but he hadn’t quite factored that in when he had considered how to do this. Harry’s size in his male genitalia was a sign of his fertility in his female counterpart. From Harry’s length and girth, Harry was very very fertile indeed. Harry cried out at the growl, the vibrations going straight through him, and Severus knew exactly what to do.

Harry couldn’t think, he just couldn’t. All he could do was feel the wet heat around him. His fingers tangled in Severus’ silky hair and he knew his fingers were tightening, but he couldn’t help it. It just felt so good. When Lucius had forced him, he had never imagined that this could feel good. It had just been brutal. When Lucius had forced himself down Harry’s throat all he could think about was not passing out, how soon it would end. Now all he knew was the sinfully delicious moist heat surrounding him, the pressure of the wonderful mouth sucking, the dance of that wicked tongue. He could feel Severus’ tongue on him, stroking the underside. He tried to buck at the feel of teeth again, scraping ever so gently along him, but he couldn’t, Severus’ hand stopped him. He growled in frustration and then cried out as Severus hummed once more. It was ecstasy.

“Please, Severus, I need it,” Harry cried, and Severus felt his heart leap. There it was, that one innocent little sentence that let him know that Harry was at that point, that point when he was at his most desperate, that he was hanging on the edge and only needed one little thing to tip him over. He was aware that Harry found it slightly embarrassing that he always uttered the same sentence, but Severus prized it. He was the only one who got to hear it.

Harry knew he had said it, he couldn’t help it. He needed it, needed it so very badly.

And then, there it was. A skilled finger, angled perfectly, rubbing him on that bit. That bit that felt so good, the bit that always sent him over the edge. And this time was no different. His world exploded in a flash of light and heat and bliss.

Severus watched as Harry stiffened, as he cried out Severus’ name. God, he had missed that. Even if he didn’t get a turn tonight he would be happy, seeing Harry enjoy such satisfaction was enough. He felt the release fill his mouth and he swallowed, taking it all. Harry tasted sweet, and a little bitter, just the way he had imagined. It was like ambrosia. A gift from above. He waited until Harry collapsed, spent, on the bed before he released him from his lips. He licked them and crawled up the bed, gathering Harry into his arms, kissing his neck as Harry rode out the last of his tremors, clutching at Severus’ arms.

“Severus?” Harry asked when he regained some semblance of sanity.

“Right here, Harry. I’m right here,” Severus replied, nuzzling his neck.

“Severus? What is that bit that feels good?” Harry enquired, remembering how Severus had sent him spiralling into explosions of paradise.

“What bit?” Severus questioned. Harry had a lot of bits that felt good.

“The one you touched when I called out to you that I needed it, the one that feels really good when you touch it.”

“Oh, that bit. That is your clitoris, Harry. It is part of your female anatomy.” He took Harry’s hand and guided it down, leading Harry’s fingers to the fleshy nub. Harry jerked as his fingers brushed it.

“It feels so good.” Harry pulled his hand back and entwined his fingers with Severus’. “I like that bit,” Harry said simply, making Severus chuckle.

“Indeed. Did you enjoy yourself?”

Harry grinned. “Yes. That was amazing. I never thought it could be so good. Thank you.”

Severus chortled. “You’re welcome. I enjoyed it too.”

Harry twisted in his arms and looked him in the eye. “Really? But you didn’t come,” Harry asked in surprise.

“I love watching you enjoy my touch, I adore watching you find your pleasure,” Severus explained. “I like knowing that no one has ever made you feel this good but me. I know it’s a little arrogant of me, but I feel proud knowing that I make you feel this way, me and no other. I could watch you forever.”

Harry smiled through his blush. “You like watching me that much?” he asked shyly. Severus nodded, kissing the tip of his nose and then his scar, just the way he liked.

Harry loved these moments, when Severus would hold him like this. Harry knew that he would never love anyone like he loved his husband. Harry giggled.

“What?” Severus asked.

Harry had to stifle his laughter. “Nothing. It’s just…I never imagined loving you like this. You were my least favourite teacher. And now we’re married. And I love you more than anyone else in the world.” Harry’s brow furrowed in confusion. “Well, except Miri. But I love her differently than I love you…I love her more than anyone too. Am I making any kind of sense right now?”

Severus kissed him, and Harry could taste himself on his husbands lips. “Yes, Harry. I understand you perfectly. I love you, too. I will admit, when you arrived at Hogwarts, I under no circumstances envisioned that I would love you. I would not have imagined starting something with one of my students, either. However, I can honestly say that I have never been happier, and I am rather glad I broke the rules.” Severus kissed him deep, his tongue coming out to swipe across that kiss swollen bottom lip.

“Why do you taste different?” Harry asked, intrigued by Severus’ new flavour. He hadn’t tasted like that before.

Severus chuckled. “You came in my mouth, love. I taste of your release because I swallowed it. I chose to swallow, but it is not a requirement of the act,” Severus explained.

“Oh. It’s not weird that I taste myself, is it?” Harry asked.

“No. It’s part of fellatio. Does it bother you?”

“No...I don’t think so. It’s just different, I guess.”

They lay there together for a while, kissing gently, exploring with their hands what they had longed for.

“Severus?” Harry asked as his husband ran his thumb over his bare hipbone.

“Yes, Harry?”

“Do you think I could do it?”

“Do what?”

“Pleasure you with my mouth.”

Severus froze. He hadn’t considered that Harry would want to pleasure him that way. The thought of it made him painfully hard, but then his imagination kicked in, and all he could picture was his sweet Harry being forced to perform fellatio by Lucius.

“I didn’t think you would want to,” Severus said carefully.

Harry looked thoughtful. “I didn’t think I would want to either. But you did it to me…and it went okay…so…maybe it won’t be so bad…me doing it to you,” Harry reasoned.

“You don’t have to if you’re unsure,” Severus advised. “I would be satisfied by your hand if that is what you feel comfortable with. I want you to give me whatever you want to, Harry.”

“I’m not unsure,” Harry said with a smile. “I want to use my mouth…it’s just…”

Severus ran his thumb over one impossibly high cheekbone. Harry really was breathtaking, and he adored every inch of him, tender heart, beautiful body and loving soul.

“I don’t know how to do it to you,” Harry admitted and Severus smiled.

“I can talk you through it, if you want to do it,” Severus offered.

“Well, it’s only fair. You should get a turn too.”

Severus’ face turned serious and he gazed into the captivating eyes. “Harry, forget about fair. There are other ways for you to pleasure me. If you don’t want to do this then it is perfectly all right. I will never force you into anything you are not completely sure about.”

“I know that,” Harry said and kissed him, sweet and gentle. “I know you’d never force me into anything. It’s one of the many things I love you for.” Severus smiled at him and kissed his scar again. “I want to do it. I want to make you feel as good as you made me feel. I want to do it,” Harry guaranteed.

Severus knew Harry was being honest with him, Harry had never lied to him about their enjoyment of each other. All his imaginings about Lucius had suddenly disappeared with Harry’s assurances. But something held him back still: he wasn’t sure if he could restrain himself.

“Harry…if you do this, I’m not sure I can keep a clear head while you give me this,” he admitted. “I don’t want to thrust and find that I have pushed my way down your throat, that I have pushed you too far without meaning to.”

Harry looked meditatively at him, his mind working through the haze of post orgasmic bliss to piece together what Severus had actually done. “I couldn’t buck. I tried but I couldn’t. How did you do that?” Harry asked.

“I put my hand on your stomach and I held you down.”

“Why don’t I hold you down, like you did to me? If I stop you, then you can’t push. But…you’re a lot stronger than me. So…how do I do that?” Harry asked.

Severus considered it. Harry’s hands were too small to do what he had done. There was another way, though.

“You hold my hips. You hold them to the bed,” Severus replied.

“Both of my hands will be holding your hips, so I just use my mouth, right?” Harry asked, gaining confidence.

“Yes.”

“What do I do?” Harry asked, his innocence enticing Severus.

“You use your tongue and your lips. You can use your teeth. It has been that long since I was pleasured orally that I can’t remember what I like during fellatio. Just experiment. You’ll find out what I get pleasure from,” Severus hissed out as Harry reached down, slipping his hand inside his boxers, and began to stroke him.

“Do I have to swallow?” Harry asked as he nuzzled Severus’ neck, his hand moving slowly along Severus’ length.

“No. I will warn you when I’m about to come. If you don’t want to swallow, you can pull back, I won’t be offended. It is your choice,” Severus reassured, his mind clouded by the feel of Harry fondling his balls.

Harry kissed him once more before he pushed him to his back, stripping him of the black silk. Harry kissed his way down and paused above Severus’ penis, standing proudly from a nest of black curls. Harry reached out and ran his fingers through the coarse hair, Severus moaning. He bent forwards from his kneeling position and licked the white drop from the tip. Severus gasped.

It wasn’t so bad, Harry decided. Very salty, and a little bitter, but not so bad. He glanced up to find Severus watching him, waiting, his eyes communicating that he didn’t have to, that he could still say no, that he could change his mind at any time. Harry smiled at him and reached out to curl his hands around Severus’ hips.

“I hold you like this?” he asked.

“Just like that. When I push up, you push down to stop me,” Severus praised, his voice strained. Harry wriggled to get comfortable and Severus’ spread legs came up to cradle his arms.

Harry bent down and licked again, and he knew what Severus meant when he had said ‘held you down’. Severus tried to buck and Harry forced back against him.

“Sorry, love,” Severus said softly and he looked up.

“Don’t apologise. I stopped you. And it means it feels good, right? Like when you twitch.”

“Yes, it is exactly like when I twitch.”

“Then just lie back and relax. I’m in control. I know that. Just relax,” Harry ordered.

Severus smiled. “All right. But take your time, do not rush. You have all the time in the world, love. And if you want to pull back at any time, if you want to stop, do so. Do not force yourself for me,” Severus warned, gently.

Harry smiled at him and kissed his raised knee.

Harry looked at the hard member and strategized the best way to approach it. He couldn’t just swoop in, he knew that would be too much too fast. But the top didn’t look too scary. He focussed on that one bit. It was small, and it looked kind of sectioned off from the rest. He decided to start with that bit and he took it into his mouth. He let his tongue explore it.

His hands tightened and he pushed down as Severus tried to buck. The cock moved a few millimetres deeper into his mouth but not much. He kept pressing down as his tongue moved, Severus moaning. Obviously easing his pressure was not a good idea.

The skin under his tongue was smooth and soft. It wasn’t so scary like this, he decided. He could taste that white drop again and he dipped his tongue into the slit, hearing Severus call his name in pleasure. He took it a little deeper, just a little, and found that he wasn’t gagging the way he had with Lucius. He found that this felt kind of good, making Severus feel this way. He kind of liked it.

He pulled up and began to suck slightly at the head. Severus’ fingers threaded through his hair, stroking so tenderly. How did Severus do that? Harry had nearly left the man bald. Well, it had felt that way when he was tugging.

“God, Harry!” Severus cried, breathless. “Just like that, love.”

Harry began to reply, until he remembered his mouth was occupied. It briefly hit him that Aunt Petunia had always told him not to talk with his mouth full, but Severus didn’t seem to mind it right then. In fact, Harry had to press down incredibly hard to keep Severus from bucking, the older man fair near screaming.

So Harry continued on like that, sucking and humming. Severus was babbling incoherently and Harry figured that his husband must have been close. He sucked harder and began to move up and down, taking more. He didn’t take a lot in, it didn’t once approach his throat and there were inches left uncovered, but Severus didn’t appear to mind.

Harry scraped his teeth oh so lightly along the hard flesh and that was it. Severus’ hands left his hair and gripped at the sheet, his hips attempted to surge upwards but were still restrained by Harry’s hands, and Severus called out to him.

“Now, Harry!” Severus called desperately, warning him. Harry only had a moment to make his decision but he found that he didn’t really have to think about it.

He pulled back sharply, pushing his body forwards so he was hovering over his husbands thrusting form, his hands coming to support him alongside Severus’ ribs, and Severus’ release landed on his stomach.

Harry watched his husband as he panted and shook, and then crawled up the bed to lie beside him, waiting, feeling unsure. Severus came, so he must have enjoyed it, but he still felt filled by self doubt.

Severus’ breathing eventually returned to normal and his heart stopped pounding. He glanced down, but Harry was not between his legs anymore. He looked to the side and there he was, waiting. Severus smiled at him, rolled to his side and pulled him in for a kiss. Harry’s kiss didn’t taste any different, so he guessed that Harry had not swallowed.

Harry kissed him in return, but when they pulled back, Harry looked unsure of himself.

“What, love? Come on, you can tell me,” Severus urged. “Did you not like doing it?”

Harry shook his head. “It’s not that, I did kind of like it. It’s just…Was it…..was I……I mean…..”

“Were you good at it? Was it good for me? Did I enjoy it?” Severus supplied and Harry nodded. Severus smiled. “You were very good, Harry. And it was very good, I enjoyed it tremendously. It was perfect, love.”

“I didn’t swallow,” Harry admitted. “It landed on my stomach. Is that okay?”

“That is no problem. It was completely your choice to swallow or not. Are you all right?” Severus asked, worried by Harry’s sudden doubt. He performed a cleaning charm on his lover, removing the stickiness.

Harry nodded but Severus wasn’t convinced. “Harry,” he said as he pulled Harry onto his chest, rolling to his back and wrapping his arms around the slender frame. “You did want to do it, didn’t you? You didn’t rush yourself?”

“No, I wanted to do it. I didn’t rush,” Harry answered.

“Did you not like doing it? Are you trying to tell me that you don’t want to do it again? Because that is all right, Harry. You don’t have to do it again if you don’t want to.”

“No, it’s not that. I kind of enjoyed doing it. I don’t know if I want to again but I liked doing it…kind of.”

“Is it because I kept trying to buck? I didn’t push too far, did I?” Severus asked, running out of ideas as to what could be wrong. Harry didn’t seem to be forthcoming with an explanation of his sudden change in mood. If Harry had still been pregnant, Severus would have put it down to hormones. As he wasn’t, Severus knew that this was down to Lucius’ treatment of him. Maybe he shouldn’t have let Harry test himself, maybe it wasn’t a good idea after all.

“No, I stopped you, and I knew you’d try to. You told me you would. You didn’t go too far. It’s not that,” Harry replied. Harry wanted to tell him what was wrong, he just didn’t know how.

Severus pondered it. That only left one more thing. “Is it about you swallowing, Harry?” he asked gently and Harry nodded against his chest. “It’s all right, love. You didn’t have to.”

“But I wanted to,” Harry mumbled. “I wanted to do what you did but I couldn’t.”

Ah, Severus understood now. Lucius had made Harry swallow.

“Harry, look at me,” Severus commanded gently and the bright orbs fixed on his jet ones. “It is perfectly all right for you not to swallow. I understand why you couldn’t. Maybe next time you will be able to, but I am very proud of you for managing to actually go through with it.” He didn’t mention Lucius, or the last time Harry had performed oral against his will, he didn’t mention any point in time before he had begun sweeping away all the wrongs of Harry’s past with his touch. He was careful to keep his tone soothing, and the topic encouraging.

“You’re sure it doesn’t matter?” Harry asked, but Severus could tell the question was only a last token move of seeking comfort Severus always gave without question. Harry already believed him.

“Positive. Harry, not everyone swallows. Some pull back, like you did. It is a personal choice. I chose to remain still instead of pull back. It was what I wanted, Harry. You pulled back because you wanted to. It is absolutely acceptable,” Severus reassured

Harry relaxed against him and smiled shakily. “You’re sure it was good?” he asked shyly.

“Exquisite. I enjoyed it immensely,” Severus said immediately, smiling lustily.

Harry blushed and snuggled against him. Severus smoothed down the wayward hair without success, but he loved to try. Something about the wild raven strands just made his fingers itch.

“I didn’t pull too hard on your hair, did I?” Severus asked suddenly, remembering the way Harry had yanked at his. He felt ice in the pit of his stomach at the thought of hurting Harry, even by accident in the heat of passion.

“No. You didn’t pull it at all, actually. You yanked at the sheet,” Harry said sleepily.

Severus chuckled, the ice melting. He reminded himself that Harry’s hair was in dire need of a trim and made a mental note to ask Molly to do it. Severus knew from past experience with Solarin that he would not make his lover look good if he were to attempt the haircut. He and Harry kept forgetting and now it was hanging in his lovers eyes.

“Do you know what potion to make to help Draco?” Harry asked as Severus summoned their discarded boxers.

“Yes. It’s a simple potion. It’ll take a mere hour to brew. I will prepare it myself tomorrow after breakfast. Draco should be cured by this time tomorrow, if Sol is right,” Severus replied as they slipped on their underwear. Severus moved from the bed and cracked open the window, trying to entice the breeze. He slipped back into bed, pulling Harry into his arms, and sighed as the breeze did actually move over his skin. They settled the light sheet over themselves, more to soak up the sweat than actual covering, and snuggled down to try and get in a couple of hours sleep before Miri demanded their attention.

“I love you, Severus,” Harry muttered sleepily, settling further into Severus’ embrace, pushing back to be more firmly against the broad chest. It was hot and sweaty, but Harry couldn’t sleep without Severus holding him, inducing dreams of being carried far away, just the two of them.

“I love you, Harry,” Severus replied, kissing the back of his neck. He cast a cooling charm over them and sighed.

Severus felt exceedingly calm. Funny how things never stay calm for very long.

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Bill slipped into the basement room that had been converted into Severus’ potions lab and leaned against the door, sighing in relief.

“No pacing people in here,” Bill explained at Severus’ questioning glance.

“Everything all right upstairs?” Severus asked, adding crushed butterfly wings.

“Bloody connection. Solarin keeps picking up all the tension and I keep getting what she does. I love your sister, but sometimes I wish she wasn’t quite so deep in my head,” Bill explained. He winced. “And that she’d remember bloody barriers when she’s stressed. She’s turned into a mother hen over that boy,” he grumbled, rubbing his temples.

Severus smirked. “Are the two of you all right now?” he asked offhandedly, adding armadillo bile.

Bill looked at him worriedly, as if he had walked in on Severus doing something very private. “We’re fine…Severus…umm…well…”

“Do spit it out, I do not bite,” Severus encouraged.

Bill took a deep breath. “Solarin showed me her memories. She showed me your father,” he admitted, watching Severus freeze momentarily. “I won’t tell anyone, I just thought you should know.”

“Thank you for the courtesy,” Severus whispered before his serenity returned. “I would ask you if you would like to help but I remember you as an abysmal brewer,” Severus said, adjusting the flame and stirring smoothly in a figure of eight.

“I never did get any better with it, so it’s probably better if I don’t help. I might accidentally poison him.” He laughed. “I’m not sure who would kill me first if I poisoned him. My money is on Solarin or Sirius, though Harry and Remus come a close second. Not quite sure where you’d come in the list, above or below Harry.”

Severus grinned and tried to get his mind off of the activities of the previous evening provoked by that simple innocent statement. “I will not be letting you help, so you will not be poisoning Draco anytime soon,” he said, grateful for the workbench that hid his arousal.

“Nice to know. Do you mind if I watch?”

Severus looked at him in question as he added three grams of camomile.

“I may be terrible at making my own, but there is something very soothing about watching someone else brew potions,” Bill explained.

“Very well. Just try not to touch anything.”

Bill perched himself on a free counter and observed Severus at work. It really wasn’t fair. When he made potions, he was all clumsy movements and mistakes. Only Solarin’s intervention had allowed him to pass his O.W.L.’s and N.E.W.T.’s. But the Snape siblings were naturals. They flowed with grace and ease. It was no wonder that Severus had become a Potions Master. It was like watching some kind of beautiful and complicated dance.

“It needs to simmer for twenty minutes before the asclepias tuberosa is added. I assume it is not safe to venture upstairs?” Severus asked.

“Definitely not. It’s like they’re all waiting for a bomb to go off or something.”

Severus smirked. “Very well.”

He began to clean the workspace and Bill hopped down from his perch, lending a hand. Together they cleaned up and then stood in silence, watching the potion turn a bright crystalline orange. This one simple potion would be all that was needed to cure Draco of his symptoms, if Solarin was right. If not then it would be harmless to him. Everyone was apprehensive as to what might be lurking behind the concealment, but they knew it was for the best. Draco’s symptoms could no be left untreated, not now they were getting worse. The blonde was still numb, but he no longer enjoyed it as he had to begin with. Now it had begun to scare him. His fear had only increased when he had stood in the path of a lit candle and set himself alight. It wasn’t until Arthur had yelled out to him did he notice.

Severus moved forwards and added the asclepias tuberosa, stirring the potion in a clockwise motion. He added one counter clockwise stir and turned off the flame. He ladled some into a goblet and handed it to Bill.

“You can do the honours,” Severus said, pouring the rest of the potion into a labelled sterilised bottle and putting a stopper in, placing it on a shelf. He performed a cleaning charm on his cauldron and the two men made their way up to the kitchen, where everyone was gathered.

Remus looked exhausted, but had insisted being there when Draco took the mixture. Everyone had insisted. Draco was sitting between his parents, with Charlie off to his left and Harry to his right, holding Miri. Solarin was pacing with Molly and Tonks; the Twins were cracking their knuckles, Arthur telling them to stop at regular intervals; Albus, Ron, Hermione and Ginny were settled in chairs by the open window, enjoying the breeze. The sky was grey and ominous, and it only added to the anticipation.

They all jumped as Severus and Bill entered the room. The curse breaker moved forwards and placed the steaming goblet in front of Draco.

“You need to drink it while it is still hot. It solidifies as it cools,” Severus instructed. “It will be disagreeable to tolerate, but you need to down it all. We should see a result immediately.” He paused. “Draco, if you have changed your mind and wish not to take it, it is all right.”

They all watched him, watched the way he eyed the goblet and reached out a shaking hand to grasp it. Sirius’ hand came out to hold his wrist to steady him, but Draco did not lift the goblet. He seemed to be making his mind up about whether or not to drink it. They all waited with baited breath.

“Close the damn connection!”

They all jumped and it was only Remus’ hand coming forwards to steady the glass that stopped Draco from spilling it. They looked at Bill accusingly.

“I’m sorry, but you’re all on edge and she can sense it and she’s passing it through the connection,” Bill explained.

Solarin looked sheepish as she muttered an apology and Bill smiled, kissing her temple. Harry got up from his seat and handed Miri to Ron. Draco needed him more than his daughter right now and she was in a good mood, she would be fine with Ron for a bit. Ron settled her on his lap and began to bounce her, Miri squealing in delight. Dumbledore tickled at her tummy and she attempted to grab his hand.

“Well, now that Bill has broken the tension, are you going to drink it?” Tonks asked Draco kindly.

The blonde nodded and lifted the goblet, taking a deep breath before gulping the whole thing in one go, not stopping until it was all down his throat. It seemed like it had taken a lot of effort to get it down. It must have tasted horrific, if Draco’s expression was anything to go by. Sirius took the goblet and set it down as Draco held his hands over his mouth, keeping it closed. He appeared to be attempting to not throw it back up.

“Deep breaths, Draco,” Remus urged, using a tissue to wipe away the sweat that had beaded on the pale forehead. After a few minutes, Draco stopped gagging and looked around.

“I don’t feel any different,” he said. He didn’t appear any different either. They all looked at Solarin.

But before anyone managed to ask anything of the confused augur, the room exploded. Remus, Sirius, Charlie and Harry were blasted out of their seats, bright orange smoke that smelled vaguely of cherries filling the room. Miri began to whimper. Severus darted forwards and checked Harry over, Molly doing the same with Charlie. Arthur and Bill moved to Remus and Sirius. They all seemed to be unharmed, only a little shaken. They all glanced around for Draco, but all they managed to see was a flash of blonde hair as he ran from the room. They heard the bathroom door slam down the hall.

“What happened?” Harry asked as Severus helped him to his feet. “What was that?”

“That would be the potion working, I think,” Remus supplied as Arthur settled him in his seat.

“Why the hell didn’t it work straight away?” Sirius asked, rubbing his bruised shoulder while his eyes scanned Remus’ form, checking he was all right.

“The concealment has been there a long time. It was probably a delayed reaction,” Molly put in.

Charlie’s expression was one of absolute panic. “Go,” Harry said and Charlie sped from the room. They could hear him knocking on the bathroom door, asking Draco to open it.

Harry retrieved his daughter from his friend and pushed Severus into a chair, settling himself into his lap. The strong slim arms came around them both and together the Potter-Snape’s soothed their daughter.

No one knew quite what to say or do. Nobody had any idea what Draco really did look like now, and Charlie didn’t seem to be having any luck getting through the door.

As everyone settled down to wait, the heavens opened and the heat wave broke.

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Lunch and dinner passed and still Draco had not come out of the bathroom. The early morning light began to fight its way through the rain and still Draco did not emerge. Harry eased himself from the bed and moved to Miri’s room, retrieving his gurgling baby from her crib. After she had slept so well in it, Harry and Severus had decided that maybe the time had come to have her sleep in her own room. So far, it was going well, and Miri had slept through from midnight till five am before needing another feed.

Harry glanced into his bedroom, smiling at Severus wrapping around a pillow in his absence. His husband was worried that maybe he had done something wrong within the preparation of the potion and Harry had eventually had to force a sleeping draught down him to get him to actually settle. He knew Severus would be all right, he just needed to sleep in order to think straight.

Harry opened the first few buttons of his pyjama top and exposed one breast, the questing mouth latching on immediately. Harry could hear voices from below him and he walked downstairs while nursing, taking his time.

“What are you all doing up?” Harry asked as he entered the kitchen, Remus quickly shoving something into the bin.

The kitchen was full of people. Remus, Sirius, Arthur, Molly, Charlie and Solarin. They all looked tired and anxious.

“What makes you think we’ve gone to bed yet?” Charlie asked.

“Draco still not come out?” Harry asked as he settled in a chair. Sirius shook his head. “Have all of you given it a try?”

“Many times,” Remus replied. “He won’t talk to any of us.”

Miri detached and Harry covered himself, leaving his top unbuttoned, before putting her against his shoulder.

“I shouldn’t have even suggested it. This is all my fault,” Solarin said miserably.

“Don’t blame yourself. Once he set himself on fire, we knew it needed to be done,” Harry argued as he rubbed the tiny back. “It was his choice to drink it. If it makes you feel any better, Severus is doing about as well as you are. He’s convinced he messed up somewhere with the potion. Kept rambling about butterfly wings and armadillo bile. I had to make him drink a sleeping draught to finally calm down. This is no one’s fault, and it was Draco’s choice. No one forced him to drink it.”

“But I’m the one that just couldn’t leave well enough alone. I kept chipping at it, determined to solve the puzzle. If I could just keep my nose out he wouldn’t be shut in the bathroom,” she reasoned. “I feel so stupid.”

She buried her head in her hands and sighed. Harry could see her tears hit the aged wood of the table.

“I promised him I’d take care of him,” she whispered. Remus moved forwards and pulled her into a hug.

“You do take care of him,” Remus said certainly. “You do very well. Just give him time, he’ll come out when he’s ready.”

“Once again, you are the reasonable parent,” Sirius joked and Remus blushed. Solarin let out a shaky laugh.

“One of you needs to be with two teenagers,” she teased. “And it’s definitely not you, Sirius.”

“Oi! I can be reasonable,” Sirius argued, grinning.

“Yeah right,” she scoffed. “You’re possessive and hot headed. Frankly, I don’t know how Remus puts up with you.” She was smiling now and Harry grinned with her.

“Oh, he has his perks,” Remus said lustily, eyeing Sirius suggestively.

“Please, parents! Me and Miri are far too young to have you do that while we’re in the room,” Harry interjected, sticking his tongue out in disgust. They chuckled at him, Remus somewhat embarrassed, as he drew Miri to his other breast to finish her feed.

“I must say, the two of you make wonderful parents,” Molly added, changing the subject from Sirius’ ‘perks’.

“Well, it’s taken us long enough to get the chance. And we have a lot of guidance so we don’t screw up too badly,” Remus said, kissing her on the cheek. “We really wouldn’t be doing very well without you and Arthur as an example.”

She blushed and Harry grinned. He knew how much his fathers had wanted to be parents, and he realized that he had gotten married not long after they adopted him. It must have been hard for them to watch him always turn to Severus first. Miri finished her feed and he buttoned himself up before standing. He moved round the table and gave her to Molly to wind.

Sirius jumped as Harry hugged him, really hugged him. It was the first time he had done so since he was rescued. Sirius hesitated for a moment before he wrapped his arms around his godson, closing his eyes and savouring the moment. Much too soon for his liking, Harry slipped out of his hold and moved to hug Remus, the lycanthrope looking as stunned as he was.

Harry pulled back and looked between the two of them, blushing faintly. He wasn’t good with being open with his feelings with anyone but Severus, but he wanted them to know.

“I know that it must be hard for the two of you…me being with Severus when you didn’t get along with him in school…and the age gap…and that he was my professor. Damn, this is coming out all wrong…” Harry trailed off. He took a deep breath and started again. “I just wanted to…umm…let you know that…er…well…I like having the two of you as my parents…and I think that you’re good at it.”

Remus and Sirius smiled at him and the three of them moved into a group hug, their little family almost complete. All except for one hiding blonde.

“I’m going to go and try talking to him,” Harry announced.

“You think you’ll have any luck?” Arthur asked. Charlie’s eyes were fixed on Harry, full of worry.

“He’s my brother now, that might count for something,” Harry said, shrugging his shoulders. “And he saved me. It’s time I tried to repay the favour. Do you mind watching Miri for me?”

Remus stared at the baby for a moment before reaching out and taking her from Molly, cuddling the sleepy infant close to the surprise of everyone.

“Of course not. She’s our first grandchild. We should help out,” Remus said. Sirius was stunned. Remus had never voluntarily held Miri, his initial reluctance over her biological father’s methods making it hard for him to accept her.

“Are you sure, Remus?” Harry asked uncertainly, completely taken off guard by the completely unexplained change in his adoptive father. “I know you’re a little reluctant with Miri. I can take her with me if you want.”

Remus looked at him, putting all the trust he could into his amber eyes. It finally hit him why he had so much trouble accepting the baby. Harry hadn’t really felt like his cub since he had returned. Harry’s hug had dispelled all of his old hesitations and his wolf was suddenly possessive over the tiny girl. She was in his pack, not Molly’s. He should hold her, not the Weasley woman.

“She’s part of my pack. You’re my cub and she’s your pup. I want cuddles for all the ones I’ve missed.” He saw Harry’s confusion. “When you hugged me, I suddenly felt like you were my cub again. My inner wolf knows that she’s not a threat, it knows that now. I’m fine with her now you calmed the beast,” Remus explained, seeing Harry’s smile. Sirius smiled at him too.

“All right then. I will leave my pup in your capable hands while I try and help your other cub,” Harry said with a smile, sticking with the pack speak. He felt he really should have remembered how soon it was after the full moon.

He heard the calls of good luck as he left the room and padded down the hall. He knocked gently on the door and heard Draco moving inside. He thought he could make out sobs as well.

“Draco? It’s Harry. Can I come in?” Harry called lightly. Silence and louder sobbing met him as his answer. He sighed and slid down the doorframe, getting comfortable on the floor. He knew exactly what to say to Draco, and, strangely, he didn’t feel apprehensive about it at all. “All right, I’ll stay out here and talk, then. I hope you’re listening, because if you’re not then I’m just sitting here talking to myself, and that is never a good sign.” He paused, waiting to see if Draco would change his mind. The door remained closed and Harry began his reasoning. “You know, I always thought that I was just like everyone else. No one really let me in on the secret that I was different. But when I got to Hogwarts, I knew, right from the very first night in my bed. You must have had it as well, the boys in the dorm talking about sex.”

Harry paused and listened, waiting. More silence, but the sobs seemed to have faded. He could hear Draco sliding down the door to sit on the floor and listen to him.

“I knew that I was different then. I mean, if they were like me, they would talk about it, right? And, of course, Dean and Seamus were an item. Fuck, even in their first year they seemed to be together. They had these magazines with these pictures in them, adult ones, rude ones.” A snigger from the other side of the door. “Don’t laugh, I was only young,” Harry said with a smile. “I snuck a look at one of them one night when they were asleep. I was about twelve. The men in the magazine didn’t look like I did, none of them. There was this one, he was lying on his back, showing his…goods to the world. I saw everything he had in that one.” He sniggered at how embarrassed he had been, at how he had blushed. “I knew I was different then, knew for sure. And the showers being communal helped me realize it as well. But in my head I wasn’t really that different until my periods began. Did you know that I was at Hogwarts when they started?”

More silence, but Harry was positive that his brother was listening to him, so he continued.

“Yup, there I was one night, my third year, waking up in a pool of blood.” He laughed. “I thought I was dying. Such a barrel of laughs, I don’t think.” Another snigger from Draco. Laughing was a good sign. “But Ron helped me, he had a sister and a mother so he knew what it was. Well, kind of. Poor sod.” He heard Draco sigh. Harry knew he was thinking of how nasty he had been. “He figured out that I wasn’t just a boy. He helped me hide it, helped me deal with it.” Harry sighed, letting himself think back. “I hated what I was. I hated being different. I thought I was ugly and disgusting, that if people knew what I really was they’d think me repulsive. That they’d hate me,” he finished quietly.

Draco was moving against the door, Harry could hear him shifting. Maybe he was going to open it.

“What Lucius did to me didn’t help. But you did. You saved me. You didn’t look at me like I was some foul thing, you never have. You just look at me as Harry, just Harry, girly bits and all.” Another snorted laugh. Definitely good. “And then there was Severus. He showed me that I was wrong. You gave me that, you gave me my life back. You took me to Severus, not anyone else. And I will always love you for that. You gave up everything for me, and I’ll never forget that,” Harry promised and he heard Draco sniffing.

“And after all that, when it finally came time to face my family, to see them once they knew, I was terrified. But they never pulled away, not once.”

Draco was standing now, he was sure of it. He remained seated just in case he was wrong.

“Draco, this is our family, as weird as it is. As messed up and unconventional as our family is, they love us. None of us care what you look like. To us, you’re just…you. No matter what, we will still love you, we will still want you. We will never turn you away like Lucius did. You’ve got no choice now, you joined this mad house, there is no getting out of it. It’s like a life sentence.”

Draco laughed outright, though the laugh sounded slightly strange to Harry, and he stood up, facing the door.

“I don’t care what you look like. You’ll still be the one who saved me, and we’ll still have the same adoptive parents. And we share Severus, and Solarin. And Miri. Maybe now you’re fixed you can hold her.” Harry paused, hearing Draco take a deep breath. It sounded hopeful. “Will you let me in now?” Harry asked. He waited and was rewarded with the lock clicking. He saw Charlie and Solarin poke their heads round the kitchen door and he shooed them away.

He opened the door and stepped inside, locking the door firmly behind him to keep them all out, before he looked at his brother.

Only…he wasn’t a brother.

Draco was a girl.

Harry’s jaw dropped. He tried to stop it but he couldn’t, there was no way he could stop his reaction. Of all the things he’d imagined, this was not one of them.

Draco was now an inch shorter than he was, and had a perfect hourglass figure. Gone were hard muscles, replaced instead by soft femininity. The previously pointed chin and strong jaw had softened. There wasn’t even a trace of the Adam’s apple. Draco was still blonde, but now…now it was pooling on the floor in its length. Terrified eyes looked at him from under long thick eyelashes, swimming with imminent tears.

“Draco, you’re…you’re…”

“A girl,” Draco said unsteadily. The blonde now had a soft light voice, almost sweet.

“I was going to say stunning, or maybe beautiful, but yours works too,” Harry said and he watched in amazement as Draco blushed as she laughed shakily.

“That was some potion,” Harry breathed, taking a step forwards. “Are you sure that you’re a girl and not just like me, maybe? Have you…looked?” Harry asked, getting his facts right before he behaved like a Gryffindor and dived in head first to the situation.

“I looked. I’m a girl. A complete girl, not a boy bit in sight,” Draco confirmed, letting out a sort of hysterical laugh.

“Well, I guess I can now say I have a sister,” Harry said.

“Look at me! This is not what I had in mind!” she hissed, suddenly getting agitated. “I can’t go out there, not now. Merlin, look at me!”

“I’m looking,” Harry replied and she glared at him. “No one is going anywhere until you’re ready,” he soothed.

She stared at him for a long moment and sank down onto the closed lid of the toilet, seemingly closing in on herself. “It’s my fault,” she said, beginning to cry.

“What is?” Harry said, sitting Indian-style beside her on the floor.

“Lucius, what he did to you, the bad things. He did it because I’m a girl. He did it because I was a failure to him. It’s my fault,” she wept. She was shaking with the force of her sobs and Harry reached up to hold her hand. She stared at it.

“You can feel that, can’t you?” Harry asked, tackling one problem at a time.

“Yes,” she whispered in shock. “And it…it doesn’t feel bad.”

Harry smiled gently. “So, we fixed you. That’s a plus.” She couldn’t take her eyes off of his hand in hers. Harry observed that her hands were smaller than his now.

She stared into his eyes, Harry noticing that hers were now exactly like Sirius’ bright blue instead of Lucius’ cold grey. They were swimming with guilt and Harry felt his heart clench. So, now he understood, now he knew why Lucius had done that to him, how he had come to have Miri. But that wasn’t her fault.

“Draco, Lucius may have done this because you weren’t the boy he was expecting, but that doesn’t make this your fault,” Harry said vehemently. “You needing to be a boy was his problem, him needing a male heir is his problem. You’re not to blame, he is. This is all on him. And now I have one more reason to hate him.”

“What reason?” she asked, her eyes searching his, a spark of hope beginning to replace the guilt.

“He hurt my sister. You’re my sister and he did this to you. You have been so worried, so scared for so long because of him. You almost went up in flames because of him, because of what he did. He took everything you had because you did something good. He took everything and cast you aside because you helped me. He is evil. Not you.”

“But I was so vile! I called people so many horrible things, people like Hermione, and Ron. All the Weasley’s. So many good people. I’m so ashamed of what I did. I did it because he told me it was right. But it wasn’t. And I hurt so many people. I hurt you with all the names I called you, with all the times I made fun of you. How can you say I’m not evil after I hurt so many?” she argued.

“Oh yeah, it’s still you. Bloody stubborn,” he said and she smiled. It wasn’t much of a smile, but it was there. “You put that behind you. You made peace with Hermione and Ron, with all the Weasley’s. And you worked things out with me. Look at us all now. Family. I don’t blame you for anything. Not a single thing. Not what your father did, not what you said or did. This is your fresh start, your do over. You get to wipe the slate clean.”

She stared at him for a moment, processing what he had said before she crumbled fully. Harry caught her as she fell forwards, pulling her onto his lap and into a hug. She stared at him in surprise, peering at the arms holding her.

“I don’t hate it anymore,” she whispered.

He smiled.

She fell into the hug, crying her eyes out. She cried for all the things she had done, all the things she had said. She cried out all the guilt she felt, all the pain Lucius had caused them both, because of what she was.

“You’re my sister, and I love you, no matter what.”

And Harry held her, telling her that he loved her, no matter what. He kept repeating it, stroking her hair and rocking her, until she began to believe.

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Remus stroked a fingertip over the tiny nose, his eyes raking the porcelain skin, the dark curls. He ran his hand along one impossibly small arm, smiling at the way her fist gripped his fingers, even in sleep.

Molly had suggested that maybe Miri would be better in her crib, but Remus had ignored her and Sirius had told the woman not to press it. Miri was almost two months old and he hadn’t really held her yet, hadn’t really looked at her.

She was in his pack and he needed to learn her by heart, to brand her on his memory until he could recognise her by scent alone. His wolf was damn near purring in contentment, feeling protective yet satisfied by the bundle in his arms. His wolf was welcoming her to the pack, finally.

Everyone was pacing, and every now and then one of them would peek out the door at the bathroom. He didn’t care. His cubs were together, it would be all right. They would care for each other, his cubs were strong.

His wolf was leading the show, it being only a day after the waning moon. His human side was content to sit back and let it. His wolf revelled in the miniature weight of her in his arms, snuggled close. His wolf made him inhale her powdery baby smell, made him memorise it so he would always be able to find her. She was precious, she was special, she was the pup of his cub.

Remus was sitting on the floor under the sink, his knees drawn up protectively around the baby in his arms and Sirius approached slowly, seeing the wolf in control of his husband. He knew that moving too fast towards him would not be a good idea right now. The way Remus was staring at Miri, holding her hand, sniffing her, all told him that the wolf was welcoming a new member to the pack and it was not a good idea to get between the wolf and the puppy right now. Molly, Arthur and Charlie were glancing at Remus weirdly, but they had never seen him like this before, in full alpha wolf mindset. Solarin seemed to be taking it in her stride.

Amber eyes glanced up at him blazing with the alpha spirit before they calmed, the human side of Remus regaining control for now. The wolf was obviously done welcoming Miri to the pack.

Sirius walked forwards, still going slowly, and sat down next to his husband and granddaughter.

“The wolf satisfied now?” Sirius asked gently.

Remus smiled at him. “How did you know?” he asked in confusion.

“You did the same thing to Harry when he was a baby, and Draco when he was first adopted by us. Of course, Draco found it weird, so did Lily and James before we explained, but I don’t.” He smiled at Remus, placing a hand on his thigh, the touch light but growing more confident as Remus didn’t push it away. “I may get all possessive and over protective of our family but I know that you’re the alpha. And the alpha of this pack needs to welcome all new members. I, personally, enjoyed my welcome very much.” Remus smiled at the memory of the way he had ‘welcomed’ Sirius so thoroughly. “I can’t wait to see Severus’ face when you do it to him,” Sirius joked and Remus blushed.

“As Harry’s mate, Harry is plastered with his scent, I don’t need to,” Remus admitted, watching Sirius blush spectacularly.

“And Solarin? Charlie? Bill?”

“Believe me, I have welcomed all members in one way or another. By scent, by talking when my human is dominant, by their scent on one of my pack. In your case, by mating. I know my pack members. Miri was the only one who was left.”

Sirius smiled, filled with pride for his lover. “You want to put her in her cot now?” he asked gently.

“No,” Remus said immediately, the answer almost a snarl. He softened and licked Sirius’ cheek, a wolf act of apology. His wolf was too near the surface for him to control it with any kind of success, and he knew Sirius understood. “The wolf may have welcomed her, but it may not be a good thing in terms of human thinking. I will not let go of her until I give her directly to either Harry or Severus. The wolf is now determined to protect her. It would be a good idea if nobody tried to take her from me just now,” he explained, the end of his statement quiet, a simple warning.

Sirius nodded. He peered at his husband, his mate. “I’ll keep them from trying, honey, I promise.” He moved forwards and butted noses with him, careful not to touch Miri. “Do you think that our cubs are all right in there?” he asked.

“I think they’re fine. Our cubs are strong and they will care for each other. That is all they need. We will leave them be,” Remus advised and Sirius butted noses with him once more before settling back in his seat, watching his mate protect Harry’s pup.

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Harry stared at her as she pulled back, waiting for some kind of sign of how to proceed. The whole situation was just so bizarre, his mind couldn’t quite process it enough to decide how to even attempt to help Draco.

“I don’t want to be called Draco anymore,” she said.

Ah, a way in. Harry breathed a silent sigh of relief. “You’ve chosen a new name then?” Harry asked and she nodded. “So? What are we calling you then?”

“I like Phoenix,” she revealed. “I like the name Phoenix Rose Lupin-Black. What do you think?”

Harry considered it. The phoenix was the bird of rebirth, a symbol of fresh starts. It was perfect. Plus, it fit in with the Black family tradition of naming their children after constellations.

“I like it. I understand the Phoenix but why Rose?” he asked.

“Your mothers name was Lily, and I like the idea of flower names for girls as a family tradition. I picked Rose because you’re my brother,” she admitted shyly, blushing.

Harry gaped. “You chose it for me?”

“Yes. I can change it if you don’t like it,” she said hurriedly, mistaking his dropping jaw as disapproval.

“No!” he half yelled. “Don’t change it. If it’s what you want then it’s perfect,” he added softly and she nodded. “You know that Phoenix is so going to get shortened to Nix, right?”

“Yeah, probably by you,” she teased and he blushed. “Did you know that a nixie is a kind of German water sprite that looks like a mermaid?”

“No. Suits you though, a nickname that means sprite. You look like one,” he teased back and she pushed at his arm, giggling.

They stood up and Harry looked her over.

“This is permanent, right? I mean, I’m not suddenly going to change into a boy again am I?” she asked.

“No, this is permanent. This is the way you were always meant to look. This is what you were always like under the spell,” Harry reeling off what Severus had told him earlier. “We’re going to have to do something about your hair, it is way too long,” he appraised. “It probably grew under the concealment. It’s not white blonde anymore, it’s more a strawberry blonde.”

“Can you cut it for me?” she asked, holding out a pair of scissors to him.

“Me? Have you looked at my hair lately? I’m not the best candidate for hairstyling.”

“I’m not asking you to style it, just cut it so I can actually walk properly,” she said stubbornly, pushing the handle of the scissors into his hand.

He eyed the scissors and then her hair. It was straight and he envied it. It looked so much easier to handle than his own. He sighed. If he knew her, she would not give up. The little Slytherin was like a rottweiler with a bone sometimes.

“Where am I cutting it to?” he asked as she turned around.

“My waist.”

Harry knelt down and grabbed the waterfall of hair, pushing the pooling excess on the floor out of his way. He pulled it between the blades and paused.

“Are you going to yell at me if this looks really bad when I’m done?” he asked.

“No. I’m going to get Molly or Solarin to do it properly later. But I can’t bloody walk properly, it’s too much.”

Harry smiled, took a deep breath and began to cut. The blonde hair fell away and Phoenix sighed as he finished.

“It’s so much heavier than when I was a boy. Or when I looked like a boy…” she trailed off, Harry standing up and peering over her shoulder at her in the mirror.

“When you were Draco there was so much less of it,” he supplied. He turned away and gathered up the metres of discarded hair, bundling it into the empty laundry sack. “We’ll need to destroy this. Too many dark potions can be made using your hair.”

She nodded and leaned against the sink, eyeing the door warily.

“Do I really have to go out there?” she asked.

“You’re going to have to sooner or later. Best just to get it over with,” he said, waiting for her.

She chewed at her lower lip as she looked into his bright green eyes with her own bright blue ones. “What if Charlie doesn’t want me anymore?” she whispered. “He wanted me when I was Draco, what if he doesn’t want me now I’m Phoenix?”

Harry moved forwards, pulling her into a hug. “You’re still you, just different packaging,” he said firmly. “And if he doesn’t want you now, then he’s not worth having. If he loves you, he won’t care.”

“But he likes guys,” she clarified. “What if he doesn’t like me because I’m a girl?”

Harry chuckled and pulled back, cupping her cheek. “Charlie is bisexual. He likes both. He told me himself during dinner last night,” he said and her mouth fell open into a perfect ‘O’. He laughed at her outright. “His last relationship was with a guy, and the one before was with a girl.”

“Really?”

He nodded and she stared at the door once more before slipping her hand into his.

“Stay with me?” she asked. He grabbed the bag and smiled

“I’ll stay with you as long as you need me.”

He pulled her to the door and led her to the kitchen. She stopped just outside the door and he peeked in. Everyone was up now, and Harry realized that they had been in the bathroom for two hours. Severus looked at him curiously, his gaze attracting the attention of everyone else. They all stared at him, waiting, as he dropped the bag by the bin.

“Phoenix has come out of the bathroom,” Harry said, not quite sure what else he could say.

“Who is Phoenix?” Bill asked, Solarin perched on his lap, looking anxious.

Harry tugged her forwards, bringing her with him into the room. “This is Phoenix Rose Lupin-Black, formerly Draco Lucius Malfoy,” he explained and the kitchen fell silent. All of them gawked at Phoenix and she moved closer to Harry, her grip on his hand tightening.

“This is what the spell was hiding?” Sirius asked. Surprisingly he was the first to recover, and Harry found himself confused as to why his fathers were sitting on the floor. Remus was still holding Miri, his posture protective.

“Yes,” Phoenix whispered.

Solarin pulled out her wand and walked to the two teens, her eyes wide. “Can I check?” she asked softly and the blonde nodded.

Solarin waved her wand over the girl, muttering spells too fast for Harry to distinguish. Her wand tip glowed different colours depending on what spell was uttered. She dropped her wand and looked at the rest of the pack.

“This is real. She is a girl, this is what the spell was hiding,” she proclaimed. Sirius stood up and began to move towards his daughter. Solarin looked at Phoenix, her eyes guilty. “Are you all right? I’m so sorry, I never should have kept digging. If I hadn’t…”

“It’s okay,” Phoenix interrupted. She reached out her free hand and grabbed Solarin’s hand. “I don’t hate touching people anymore. I’m all fixed. I asked you to fix me and you did. I don’t want to scream and throw up when someone touches me, and I’m not numb. I feel absolutely fine, better than I ever remember feeling. So, you really have nothing to apologise for.”

She moved forwards and let Solarin embrace her, though she still kept a tight hold on Harry’s hand. It seemed to break the tension in the room and everyone began to talk at once.

But Harry’s attention was drawn to the way Severus kept glancing worriedly at Remus and Miri. Phoenix finally let go of Harry’s hand, Sirius checking her for any injury and pushing her into a chair, Molly fixing her something to eat. Harry moved to his husband and sat down next to him.

“Severus? What’s wrong? Did I give you too much sleeping draught?” Harry asked, motioning to the mug of black coffee in his lovers hands and peering at the bloodshot eyes.

“A little too much, but I’m all right, the headache will ease. That is not the problem,” Severus replied. “Remus won’t let go of Miri.”

Harry glanced at his father, noticing for the first time how agitated he seemed.

“When I came down, Sirius tried to get him to give her to me. He damn near pounced on Sirius for suggesting it. He snarled something about the pup belonging to his cub, not the mate,” Severus explained. “She’s not in danger from him, I don’t think. He just won’t let go of her.”

Harry kissed him and made his way over to Remus, moving slowly. Sirius realized his approach and began to hover nearby, unsure of himself.

Sirius had never seen Remus so territorial, not once. No matter how in control his wolf became, there was always something of Remus’ human side remaining. But when he had tried to follow Remus’ instructions and get him to give Miri to Severus, Remus had become…feral. It was the only way to describe the savage way in which he warned them away from the baby.

Harry sat down next to Remus, keeping space between them. “Remus?”

Wild amber eyes focussed on him, and Harry knew exactly what had happened. Remus was protecting his pup, and the wolf didn’t trust anyone but the pups mother to protect such a small innocent pack member, not even the wolfs own mate. Harry’s prolonged absence must have exaggerated the alpha’s thinking, excluding even Severus. Harry silently thanked whatever deity was up there for his readings on werewolf behaviour.

“Can I have my pup back, my alpha?” Harry requested, careful to keep his voice low and submissive, to keep himself from looking directly into Remus’ eyes as he asked. Everyone was watching them, and Sirius looked tense, ready to pull Remus away if he snapped and attacked Harry.

Remus stared at him and then down at Miri before handing her over, fussing as Harry held her more securely and she snuggled against him.

“Thank you for protecting her, my alpha,” Harry said, settling Miri against his shoulder. Remus leaned forwards and butted noses with Harry, the latter giggling at the affectionate gesture before returning it with his own butting. “Is she part of the pack now?”

“Yes,” Remus replied, his wolf receding and letting his human come forward. “How did you know what had happened? How did you know what to do?”

“I did my homework,” Harry chuckled, letting Remus pull him into his lap and sniff his neck possessively.

They stayed like that for a moment before Remus released him, Severus coming forwards to help Harry to his feet. Remus looked sheepish as he got to his feet.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled.

“Nonsense,” Severus said kindly. “It is perfectly acceptable for you to protect your pack. We understand. It is, after all, not long since the full moon. Nobody got hurt and Miri was perfectly safe with you.”

Remus smiled at him and let Sirius pull him into his arms, running his hand through his hair. His eyes landed on the small blonde at the table, happily munching on scrambled eggs while watching the whole wolf scene with interest.

“What did I miss?” Remus asked, motioning to Phoenix.

Sirius sniggered. “Good news or bad news, what do you want first?” he asked.

“Good,” Remus replied, warily.

“Well, our cub came out of the bathroom,” he said, nodding at the blonde.

Remus’ eyes widened. “That is Draco?”

“Was Draco,” Harry intervened as they sat down at the table. “Technically, Draco never really existed. This is Phoenix Rose Lupin-Black.”

“He was a she under the spell?” Remus asked, Phoenix watching them silently, letting her brother handle it for the time being. She kept glancing at Charlie who was leaning against the kitchen counter, watching her with something akin to amazement written across his face.

“Yup,” Harry replied as he pulled funny faces for Miri, the tiny brunette squealing at him, smiling wide. “We should call Dumbledore.”

“He has been called. He will be here shortly,” Severus interjected, sipping at his coffee once more, though he did manage a small smile for his daughter.

“So, the bad news?” Remus asked.

“We now have two children who can get pregnant,” Sirius said, throwing dirty looks at both Severus and Charlie. Severus inclined his head in silent promise of contraception, but Charlie didn’t seem to hear him, his attention was too fixed on Phoenix. Remus smirked at Sirius before turning to the blonde.

Remus beckoned Phoenix over to him and pulled her into his lap, looking at her. “You have Sirius’ eyes,” he murmured. Everyone was watching the two, and Phoenix seemed to be too frightened to move.

She wondered if Harry had been right, would her family still want her now? She waited in silence as Remus looked her over, muttering that she had Sirius’ eyes, lifting her hand to inhale at her wrist. She had liked being his cub. She didn’t want to lose that. She had finally found where she fit, and she was terrified it would all be taken from her, that she would lose everything again. This family had taught her that money wasn’t important, that she was worth more than how many galleons she had in her purse. They had shown her how to be different, better. They had given her a life, their love. She couldn’t bear the thought of it all being taken away.

“Why so frightened, my cub?” Remus asked, feeling the shaking in the slim frame and her eyes widened.

“I’m still your cub?” she whispered.

Remus chuckled. “Of course you are. You’re still my cub, you’re still a part of my pack,” he reassured, and she fell into his arms, burying her head in his shoulder as she cried with relief.

“Definitely a girl,” Harry teased. “All those tears, you’re definitely a girl.”

She turned her head and looked at him, a slight smile on her face through her tears. “Look who’s talking,” she teased back. “You cried daily when you were pregnant.”

He stuck his tongue out at her. “Told you, Nix. Told you that you couldn’t escape us now. Lifetime membership to the madhouse,” he said.

She grinned at him.

It wasn’t so bad, being a girl. She had her family, she had their love, she belonged here. And Charlie didn’t seem to want to turn away from her, which she took as a good sign.

No, not that bad, being a girl.

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‘Being a girl sucks,’ Phoenix thought to herself as Solarin tried to help her by adjusting the straps of her first bra. Molly had taken one look at her and proclaimed that she needed new clothing.

Clothing which included a bra.

As she was pulled about, Phoenix let herself think back over the day so far. Harry reassuring her, Remus hugging her, Sirius hugging her. It was all fine until Dumbledore had shown up. It appeared to have gone downhill from there.

Severus had given her a pepper-up potion for her fatigue of staying up all night in the bathroom, and Molly had tried to force more food on her already full stomach. It was all right, it showed they cared. She had kind of enjoyed it, being fussed over. Solarin had even leant her some of her clothes until she could get her own. Then Dumbledore arrived. His news was bad, very bad.

Hermione’s parents had been killed.

Lucius had killed them in the night. He had gone to their home in search of a clue as to how to get to Harry and Miri. He had found the letter that Hermione had sent them, telling them of Harry’s beautiful baby girl. The famous Malfoy temper had exploded and he had killed them in the most horrific way. It rivalled Harry’s treatment at the hands of Lucius for its brutality and sadism.

The authorities and half the Order were now on the hunt for the fugitive murderer. They now had all the answers they ever wanted about Lucius, but it had come at a terrible price.

Dumbledore had explained everything to them. Lucius was bankrupt, and without the dowry that Draco’s marriage to Pansy would have brought him, he had lost everything. It turned out that Lucius’ father had gambled away the Malfoy fortunes, and it was only the money Narcissa brought with her to the marriage that had allowed Lucius to keep up appearances. He had used the last of it to keep himself out of Azkaban.

With Lucius expecting his heir to be male, he had received a terrible shock when Narcissa had delivered a girl. He had concealed Phoenix as Draco shortly after she was born and threatened to throw Narcissa out if she ever revealed the truth. She had been greedy for the attention she received as Lady Malfoy, so she had kept quiet.

His attack on Bill and Charlie had been explained as well. Pansy had told her father of Draco’s impotence and he had called off the arranged marriage. Lucius, having lost hold of Harry, became desperate, knowing what he had done to Draco was having noticeable side effects.

It was still a mystery how Lucius had learned of Harry’s true anatomy, but they knew now why he had tortured and raped Harry.

Lucius Malfoy could not produce male children. His treatment of Harry had been his way of trying to prove his masculinity by producing a boy. He hadn’t realised that Harry would only bear a boy if the biological father could produce them. Severus had actually shattered the glass he was holding when he heard that one, his temper making him tighten his grip.

Dumbledore had surprised them all by going back through the floo and bringing Narcissa herself with him when he returned. She was the source of all the information.

Phoenix remembered how she had moved forwards to embrace her and she had pulled away, feeling very loved when Remus’ alpha wolf flared again and snarled at her to ‘Keep away from my cub!’ Phoenix had never seen Narcissa more afraid than in that one moment and she had enjoyed it immensely. But her enjoyment faded when Hermione entered the kitchen, coming for her breakfast.

Her heart had broken for her as she had screamed at Dumbledore that it couldn’t be true, as she had begged him to take back what he had said. Phoenix had watched in horror as Hermione had collapsed in a fit of sobbing, so strong that she could barely breathe. She had clung to Ron and called Dumbledore a liar over and over.

Solarin had taken Phoenix aside and said that the two of them were going out, that they were going to deal with what she needed while everyone else cared for Hermione. Solarin had appeared to be in so much pain that Phoenix had found it hard to voice her disagreement over leaving but she managed it, not wanting to abandon Hermione. However, Bill had intervened, telling Solarin in no uncertain terms that she had to leave the house as soon as possible, that he would tell her when she could come back.

So now they were standing in a lingerie shop in Diagon Alley with Phoenix being fitted for her first bra.

“How does it feel?” Solarin asked, peering over her shoulder and catching her eyes in the reflection of the mirror.

“Weird. And uncomfortable. And it itches. This sucks,” Phoenix replied, shifting her shoulders and picking at the straps, her nose wrinkled in obvious hatred of the garment.

Solarin chuckled. “I know. They take some getting used to. What I was referring to was the fit. Is it too tight, too loose? We know the cups fit, but how about the band and the straps?”

“No, it feels fine, I guess,” she grumbled, the sales witch smiling encouragingly. “Why can’t I wear something like Harry’s?”

“Because, Nix, you’re a double D cup. A sports bra wouldn’t give you the support you need. Harry is barely an A cup. He only needs a small amount of support,” Solarin reasoned. Solarin had managed to stay patient with her throughout the entire hour long fitting process.

First off, Phoenix had refused to enter the shop, forgetting that she was a girl now. Then she had nearly died of embarrassment at the sight of so many pieces of women’s underwear. She had wished for the ground, which her eyes had remained glued upon, to open up and swallow her while Solarin explained the situation to the sales witch. Then Phoenix had argued about taking off her top. Well, until Solarin took off hers. Solarin had taken her own top off as a show of support for the obviously trying experience. Finally, Phoenix had given in and allowed the older witch to help her find underwear she didn’t absolutely loathe, a tall order in itself.

Phoenix stared at the lacy thing she was wearing. At least it wasn’t pink, that would have been a real insult to her pride.

“Does it have to be lace?” she wined. “It itches.”

Solarin actually dissolved into peels of laughter at the disgusted look on her face. “No!” she gasped. “You can have ones made of other materials, like cotton. It’s good for you to have a selection, so you can learn what you like over a period of a few days of wearing them.”

The blonde nodded and sighed. “I really have no choice, do I?”

“Nope. You have to wear one,” the augur insisted cheerfully as she pulled on her own top again.

“Fine, but no pink,” she demanded and Solarin nodded.

They finally left the shop twenty minutes later with much more than just bras. Phoenix had not only been outfitted with seven bras in various styles and materials, but socks, stockings, and panties. That had been an experience, with Solarin having to explain what the point of thongs were. Phoenix was impressed that Solarin had managed to keep a straight face. She hadn’t even blushed. It wasn’t fair, the blonde couldn’t seem to stop her face burning.

“So, why do I need a see through set of pyjamas that don’t look as if they’re designed to sleep in?” Phoenix asked as they made their way through the milling crowds.

Solarin giggled. “Every woman needs something sexy in her underwear drawer. It’s not for anyone else, it’s for you.” Phoenix looked at her confusedly. “You have a whole new body now. Well, new to you. With sleepwear like this, you can see what feels good against your skin. With sleepwear like this, you can…explore.”

Phoenix frowned, trying to figure out what she meant, and then blushed yet again as she figured it out. Solarin giggled and slipped an arm around her waist, pulling her close.

“I have some,” Solarin revealed.

“Some what?”

“Some sexy sleepwear. When I feel a little down, I put it on and it makes me feel better. Most women have something similar. Think of it as a gift to yourself.”

“But Remus and Sirius are paying for this.”

Solarin grinned. “And imagine how embarrassed they’ll be when they get the bill,” she whispered playfully in her ear, making her laugh.

They made their way to a hairdressers, and Phoenix found herself with a style similar to Solarin’s. No fringe, but carefully layered so it framed her face. She and Solarin sniggered when the stylist had proclaimed that whoever cut it in the first place was an imbecile.

After that, they visited a clothing boutique, a cosmetics retailer, a shoe shop, a small spa and a pharmacy. At the end of it, Phoenix was deposited in a seat outside Florean Fortescues Ice Cream Parlour and a large chocolate orange sundae presented as her reward for good behaviour.

“I’m impressed you actually managed to do all this without bolting once,” Solarin praised, nibbling a cherry from her own desert, a fruit cocktail with strawberry ice cream. She grinned. “Though when the beautician pulled out hot wax I felt for sure you’d run.”

Phoenix shifted in her seat. “That was bloody painful,” she grumbled, taking a spoonful and letting it melt on her tongue before swallowing it. “You’re sure I’ll never have to go through that again?”

“Never,” Solarin promised. “Tracy is very good at hair removal, and the charms to make it permanent. It will not grow back, I swear.”

Phoenix nodded. Having all your body hair pulled out by the root once in a lifetime was more than enough. All she had left now was some neatly trimmed pubic hair, her eyebrows and her long blonde hair. Though her eyebrows had been plucked. That was an experience that could only have been equalled by bloodshed. Come to think of it, it very nearly was as Phoenix had lost her temper and tried to hit the woman holding the tweezers. But Solarin had stopped her and numbed the area with a spell. It went quite smoothly after that. Well, until the bikini wax.

“I am rather surprised you wanted it done,” Solarin admitted, taking a sip of her ice water.

“Women don’t have body hair, well, most don’t. I don’t want to be different anymore,” she replied easily and the augur nodded, letting the subject drop.

The blonde looked at the older witch and wondered if she was the right one to take her worries to.

“What’s wrong?” the brunette asked at Phoenix’s worried nibbling of her lower lip.

“I just…Harry says that it’s not my fault that Lucius did bad things to him. Do you think Harry’s right?” she asked, deciding to say it all in one go, to get it out in the open.

“Yes, I do think he’s right. Lucius did what he did to both of you because he’s sick. In no way are you to blame for any of it. If Lucius wasn’t such a bastard he would have found a reasonable, legal, way to get himself out of trouble instead of doing that to Harry,” she said sincerely and without any hesitation whatsoever. Phoenix felt all her worries melt away at the simple honesty and offered a small smile. She felt very nervous when Solarin grinned wickedly.

“So…Charlie. He couldn’t take his eyes off of you at breakfast,” Solarin said lightly, nibbling at a slice of peach.

Phoenix knew she was blushing, again, but she couldn’t seem to stop doing it. Was this just part of who she was now? A blushing girl? She hoped not. It was so noticeable on her pale skin.

“Can we change the subject, please?” she asked, ducking her head in shyness and her companion giggled. Funny, she had never noticed the older witches girlish side before. Maybe it was because she was usually surrounded by men.

“Fine, fine. I was just going to ask if you thought he would mind if I ask him not to think so loud when he’s having a think about you, that’s all.”

Her blue eyes snapped up and locked with black. “He was thinking about me?”

She knew the augur was teasing her. Probably.

“Yup. Projecting loud and clear…well, before Dumbledore told us about Hermione’s parent’s, that is,” she said, her smile fading immediately.

“How is she doing? Can’t you ask Bill through the connection?” Phoenix asked sadly, memories of Hermione’s heartbreaking sobs coming to the surface.

“I keep trying but he’s not in much of a position to talk right now. I’m guessing it’s bad. He’s keeping his barriers locked tight so I can’t get in. He’s trying to protect me from all the emotions flying around back there. I’m not going to push it. He’ll talk to me when it calms down a little.”

“Is that why you looked in pain?”

“Yes. When emotions run high I can’t block them completely, and Hermione’s were, understandably, very high. It was…intense.”

They were silent, finishing their ice creams and then ordering more drinks, each lost in their own thoughts. They had almost finished them when Solarin spoke again.

“How do you feel about having Narcissa around? Sirius invited her to stay at Grimmauld Place with us, at least until she sorts herself out, and she accepted. How do you feel about that?” Solarin asked.

“I want her gone,” Phoenix snarled, startling Solarin with her sudden anger. “She let him do that to me, let him lie to me, all to keep herself in a nice cushy position. She knew what he did, and she did nothing. She could have told me, she could have stood up to him. I did. I went against him to help Harry. I lost everything to do the right thing. What kind of mother is she that just lets someone do something so twisted to their child?”

Solarin sat quietly, letting her vent her anger. God, her and Sirius were so alike. Definitely father and daughter.

“She’s a lousy mother, and she is not my family. I have a family.” Phoenix sighed, losing some of her rage as she thought of Remus and Sirius and Harry. “I have a family that loves me, I have a family that will never walk away. She did. She just packed her bags one day and left. She didn’t slow down, didn’t look back, didn’t even say goodbye. That’s not a parent. That’s a child pretending to be a mother. A parent will do anything for their child,” she reasoned, working on her experiences. “That’s why I used to hate Harry so much, you know. His parents died for him and mine never even made me feel wanted. It was unfair, and I was jealous.”

“That’s understandable,” Solarin intervened.

“The fights between you and Bill, those were about your parents weren’t they?” she asked cautiously, her curiosity getting the better of her.

“Yes, they were,” Solarin admitted quietly. “I’m not going to tell you about them, not in detail. You’re too young to have to think of something like that. But I will tell you that I didn’t have a very good experience with my parents. But I had Severus. He was all I needed. And now you have a whole big family. Is that all you need?” she asked, steering the conversation back to the little blonde and her feelings on the whole mess.

“Yes. They’re all I need. They’ve shown me so much. They’ve taught me to be different…better. I know now. I know that I’m worth more than the money I have or the Malfoy name. I like being me now. Our family gave me that. And Narcissa is not a part of that,” she said and Solarin smiled.

“Then that’s all you have to remember when dealing with her.” She snorted. “You know, legally, she’s not your mother anymore. Arthur is drawing up a new birth certificate for you, it’s part of your adoption. Remus and Sirius are going to be put down as your parents.”

Phoenix grinned. “Fine by me.”

“And Albus is going to transfer all of Draco’s school records into your name, so you have proof you went to Hogwarts. Well, all of your grades anyway,” she said with a smile, amused by the way Phoenix had suddenly brightened. “It’s a total fresh start for you, complete with paperwork.”

“That is brilliant.”

“So…Charlie,” Solarin said once more. “You know, you’ll never need blusher with a flush like that,” she teased, poking Phoenix’s cheek. The blonde batted her hand away.

“Harry told me that Charlie is bisexual. You think he still likes me now I’m different?” she asked after a few minutes of ducking her head in shyness.

The brunette smiled at her. “From what he was projecting, I’d say…hell yeah! He adores you, and…” She sniggered. “He thinks you’re hot like this. Mind you, he thought you were hot as Draco as well, so I’m guessing he’s just very into you, both of you.”

The young witches jaw dropped and she ducked down, pretending to rummage through the shopping bags to hide her current mortification.

Solarin was in a full out laughing fit at her little companions antics. She was easier to get to than Severus, it was almost too easy. Almost.

Blue eyes peeked over the table top. “Really?”

The black eyed witch nodded and the blonde let out a little squeak before she disappeared once more, causing the older witch to laugh even harder.

“Oh! Sweet Merlin! No wonder he finds you adorable!” she gasped out and found herself being glared at by a cherry red face.

“Not funny,” Phoenix ground out between clenched teeth.

“I’m sorry, sweetie. It’s just, it’s nice that you have someone.” Solarin paused, watching the fair-haired girl process the information. When she was Draco, she was quiet, withdrawn even. But now she was bubbly and full of life. The new demeanour in her student eased her lingering apprehension over her involvement in the transformation. She sighed, feeling very protective all of a sudden. “Nixie, I should give you the lecture,” she said firmly.

“What lecture?” Phoenix asked.

“The one about not getting pregnant, not rushing things and keeping yourself safe,” Solarin replied.

“You’re too late. Harry gave it to me while we were giggling in the corner before Dumbledore arrived. He did the whole big brother thing, telling me about condoms and saying no and respecting myself. He was pretty good at it, actually,” Phoenix informed, smirking at Solarin’s dumbfounded expression, which quickly turned relieved.

“Well, at least I don’t have to give it. I suck at talking about that stuff. Ask Bill. He asked me to talk to Percy once, whole big brother thing with too much embarrassment. Mortifying.”

Phoenix chuckled.

“So, I’m not required to explain my reasons for giving you these then,” she said, handing the sixteen year old a small paper bag.

Phoenix peeked inside. “Condoms? Sol, I’m not going to…you know…any time soon.”

“They’re for when you do, so you don’t get caught short. There is a charm you can use, but these are just in case.”

Phoenix was just about to retaliate that her and Charlie hadn’t even kissed yet when Solarin gasped, pitching forwards.

“Sol?” she asked worriedly, holding her steady by the upper arms.

“We need to go,” the augur commanded, beginning to gather up some of the bags, Phoenix grabbing the rest and following her back to the Leaky Cauldron.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, their pace fast as they weaved in and out of the other shoppers.

“The stress of her parents death caused Hermione to go into labour.”

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So, what did you think? Please review. I promise you that i read every single one.