And Now for Something Completely Different

Chapter 3 Meeting the Cast

Glitch gave Harry his most potent innocent look. “Don’t give me that look. This is all your fault and you know it.”

“How was I supposed to know I’d been banned from this place? I can’t remember anything.”

Harry sighed and pulled out the notebook to mark it down.

Glitch has been banned from the tribe of the Eastern guild. If he goes there they will point sharp sticks at him and any with him until you humor them and let them put you in a large hanging cage. Once there, they will push the cage until you hurl and laugh at you. The food is surprisingly good.

“Do you think you could stop that? I’m trying to write.” The little feathered people just laughed at him. Harry looked over at his traveling companion. “You know, you should probably be writing in this too.” Glitch tilted his head like he was searching for a memory, but Harry knew it was fake. Ever since they’d signed their written promise, Glitch’s memory about Harry and anything about Harry had been superb. It gave Glitch hope and his step had lightened with every remembered fact. Glitch had forced Harry to tell him every fact, important or not, so that he could get the high that comes from remembering.

They’d been in this hanging bird cage for two days now. Harry didn’t want to risk his magic because he really didn’t want to hurt the guys or scare them. “Hey Harry, you should ask them about your godfather.” Harry opened his eyes from his pretend nap, “Why would they know?” Glitch tilted his head and Harry shifted to get out the notebook if needed. “They work for the resistance, they would know if someone from the other side came through here.” Glitch only heard a few words of Harry’s grumbling, “should have told me earlier” and “Could have left days ago” were the key phrases.

Glitch loved traveling with Harry. When he’d found the, he assumed, 25 year old man asleep in the field, a month ago, he’d not even considered any danger. Glitch hadn’t ever considered danger before Harry found him. He didn’t remember things like that. To him everyone was good and happy and should be helpful. He still didn’t remember the people they came across on their travels but he remembered every word that Harry said and every move that he made. It was a glorious feeling, remembering something at last. That he was remembering his Harry made it even better. Harry took care of him, made him feel safe in a way he was sure he hadn’t felt since…that…one time…’sigh lost it’.

“Hey squawking carrot,” The one called red hat shouted ‘RED HAT’ but Harry ignored him, winking at Glitch when he giggled. “Have you seen anyone, a man, from the other side come through here?” Red Hat pushed their cage, making it swing, “We would not tell you, traitors to the Queen. Even if we had seen a man from the other side.”

Suddenly the ground shook and a crash split the air. Immediately Harry’s wands were out one pointed at where the cage was tied to the tree and the other at their feet at the hole in the basket. His body was between Glitch and the hole, keeping him from falling and breaking anything. Red Hat ran of shouting in their crude form of the language. Harry remained where he was until their cage stopped shaking.

The scream came what Glitch would have estimated to be ten minutes later, if he did that sort of thing, ‘Did he do that?’ ‘what was he thinking? Right, the scream.’ “Female” Harry said, calmer then Glitch was. His mind turned a mile a minute trying to figure out what a screaming female would mean. “What do we do Harry?”

Harry turned to smile at him, push a wayward curl behind his ear and re-zip his zipper, calming him. They’d discovered that Glitch loved it when Harry touched his zipper. “We wait Glitch. It didn’t sound like a pained scream, more surprised.” Glitch tried to tie the scream to Harry saying it was a surprised one; he wanted to be able to identify the difference later.

Soon, a girl was thrown into their cage. The blue feathered one said, “You spies should share a cage.”

“I’m not a spy!” The girl cried indignantly while the warriors walked away saying that they would come back to question them after they’d hug a while. Harry chuckled and she turned to appraise them. “What?” Glitch watched them eye each other and an odd feeling made him sick in his stomach. He asked Harry what it was. “Harry? What’s this feeling?”

The feeling stopped when Harry stopped looking at the new girl. “What feeling.” “OH! It’s gone now.” Glitch frowned and put a hand on his stomach. “When you were looking at that girl my stomach became upset.” He tilted his head waiting for Harry to explain it.

It was the girl who answered, “Oh, you were probably jealous.” He brightened immediately before he remembered that he didn’t know what jealous was. He looked at his Harry for a definition. Harry rolled his eyes, and Glitch felt a familiar pain in his chest. He knew that one, it meant he was becoming a burden again. He ignored Harry’s explanation to grab at the notebook in the bag Harry found. He opened it franticly to see their promise for himself. Slowly, and with untold relief, he lightly touched the words with his fingertips. He felt Harry’s arms go around his shoulders in a hug, “You’re not a burden Glitch.” Glitch smiled, Harry always knew what he needed to hear. He knew that to, he remembered it happening every time.

When they finally turned their attention back to the girl, she was smiling sweetly at them. Before they could get her name though, the munchkins were back.

“You girl, will the Witch be attacking from the West or the East?” Red Hat ordered.

“I don’t know. What witch?” They ignored her question just as they had Harry’s, Glitch remembered.
“You are a spy, what were you spying on?” this from the blue one, Harry hadn’t said his name so Glitch didn’t remember it.

“I’m not a spy. A tornado came and I ended up here and my parents are missing.” Glitch noticed Harry looked at the girl with his concerned face, and that jealousy feeling came back. ‘Well at least I know what it is now.’ He didn’t like that feeling and he didn’t like the girl getting to see his Harry’s concerned face.

“For the last time, will the witch be attacking from the West or the East?” still the blue one.

“Nothing you say is making any sense to me.”

“Azkadelia has searched all the villages in the area for the stone. Are we next on her list?” Glitch watched Harry mouth Azkadelia and stone and he had a memory. He grabbed the notebook and wrote down:

Azkadelia is the Queen’s daughter. I used to know her.

He passed it to Harry who read it without comment. The girl had continued to argue with their captors. Glitch tried to pay attention but the blue one had something shiny.

“Please be careful with that, it has sentimental value.” The girl tried to sound calm, but Glitch remembered Harry saying “listen to their tone as well as their words, sometimes people speak that way firstly and with their words secondarily.” She was worried about the shiny thing. He was relieved to note Harry saw that too, he never would have remembered.

Red Hat told the girl, and so them too, that they’d seen the people in the shiny running or leading long coats. ‘Long Coats…I should know that’ He had a flash, but it wasn’t enough to put in the notebook so he ignored it.

“Those are my parents,” More jealousy, Harry rarely had that gleam in his eyes.

“You say parents I say spies.” Glitch thought the little blue guy was awfully funny.

They threatened them with rhyming pain, but Glitch wasn’t worried, Harry said he would keep him safe if he could. Harry had said this was nothing. He was more concerned that the shiny had been dropped below them. He wanted the shiny.

The girl called after them as they walked away, “You guys are out of your tiny minds.” Harry laughed. ‘Am I ever going to get use to this jealousy feeling?’

“Well,” Harry started, and Glitch loved that take charge attitude thing. “I’ll make you a deal, I’ll get you your locket back, and you help us get down from here.” Glitch pointed at himself, but Harry shook his head. ‘Oh, the girl…right’ he put on his I really am all here face. “Oh? And how are you going to do that? It’s all they way down there.” Harry just smiled and Glitch sighed audibly making Harry blush and loose his under control aura.

“Don’t worry about it biscuit. Can you do your end of the deal?” He tried to take attention from his Harry.

“What do you want me to do?” She asked him suspiciously. He tried not to shrug. He didn’t even know what she was talking about. Harry took over. “We need to rock this thing to get it over there,” He pointed to the rope bridge, “and then we can get out of here.”

She nodded and Harry pointed his important sticks down the hole in the basket. “Accio locket.” Unfortunately, just like what had happened with the fish, at least five lockets flew at him, causing screaming from the little houses, and raising the alarm. “Hurry” Harry said, handing her all the shinnies. Glitch hoped he’d get one too.

The alarm came just in time, while they were escaping on the bridge, long coats came and the battle began. Quickly they shimmied down a rope and ran to hide. Harry put a hand on Glitch’s back pushing him in the correct direction. When they could no longer hear the war cries of the Eastern Guild, they stopped and the girl looked through the shiny things. She huffed disappointed. “Not there?” Harry asked apprehensive? “No” She said.

“Bugger” “Harry!” “Sorry Glitch.” It was a common exchange and it made Glitch smile to remember the other times they’d done it. “Alright Glitch, since I didn’t complete our deal, you’ll have to lead us to the old brick rode or wherever they saw her parents last.” ‘I can do that its uh..that way’

Glitch started walking but stopped when Harry grabbed his hand. He latched on to Harry’s hand tight. They didn’t often hold hands among other people. Harry said he wasn’t sure how they would react. He turned him wordlessly in another direction and Glitch nodded.

Eventually the girl introduced herself and got an explanation from Glitch for his ratty coat, which took fifteen minutes.

“You know how to get to Central city?”

“The shining city on the hill? Sure… The shining city on the hill? Sure… The shining city on the hill? Sure..” Harry thumped him on the shoulder and he reset. He shot them an embarrassed glance. Harry didn’t even react, but the girl looked at him funny. “Uh, names Glitch on account of how sometimes my synapses don’t fire right.” Harry thumped him again before he could glitch. Somehow the word ‘synapse’ was a trigger for glitches.

Harry knew they were traveling in a circle, just like he knew Glitch didn’t have a clue how to get to the road. He wasn’t paying attention though; he was listening to the sounds of pain and fear.

He told them both to stay put and disappeared. He cursed when he felt DG pull Glitch with her and follow him. He stopped at the top of a hill and assessed the situation. At least six of what the little guys called long coats were beating up a guy, and holding a woman, assumed to be his wife, still. Hitting their boy was the last straw for DG and she grabbed a stick and ran to beat them. He and Glitch followed at a stealthier pace. Harry was sure he could take them all but the girl was in the way now. He stopped up short when, just as she ran up to them, they all disappeared. In their place was an old dilapidated cabin.

A squeaky noise attracted Glitch’s attention. He walked over and turned it off, sprouting a load of technical jargon when DG asked what it was. He wordlessly held out the notebook for the man when he was done, sure he’d not be able to write it down. He didn’t understand but he could read it later. He got the important parts anyway, Glitch invented it, and it was playing some horrible thing that really happened over and over.

He followed DG as she slowly walked up to an iron thing. She jumped back when she saw eyes in it. Wordlessly Harry pushed her back and cast “Alahamorah” Glitch ran over and helped him lower the beast of a man to the ground. Just as they touched, Harry felt the same connection he felt with Glitch when they touched. A glance over at Glitch confirmed he felt it too. “Bugger” it was a measure of how messed up Glitch was that he didn’t complete the exchange.

“Where are they?” the man grunted, voice raw from disuse.

The three of them watched him get his bearings and figure out what was happening. “I’m going to kill him.” Glitch and Harry exchanged glances and they separated. Glitch convinced DG to let Harry handle it.

Harry walked up to the dirty man and said in a voice devoid of all emotion, “You can’t kill him looking like that. You’ll have to get cleaned up first.”

By the time Glitch and DG returned from wherever they were, Harry could tell Glitch had forgotten what was going on. His dark eyes widened when he saw him, and he ran into his arms yelling “Harry” Harry caught him and maneuvered them out of the immediate range of their new companion, who’d introduced himself as Wyatt Cain. “I remember you!” “Of course you do Glitch, you promised.” It was another patented exchange, doing small things like this made Glitch smile that smile of his.

They left the man to say his goodbyes and Glitch explained everything to his Harry by giving him the updated notebook. Harry always wanted to be there when Glitch had a memory, but so many of them had happened on his walk with DG. She had calmly opened the notebook and wrote them all down.

Azkadelia ordered that only those who resist her be punished like this. They would be forced to watch their loved ones killed in front of them while they were helpless to stop it. What kind of place is this?

Harry smiled at DG’s commentary. “How long were you in there?” Harry shook his head at DG’s bull headed insensitivity. “Since that was a sapling.” He pointed at a decent sized tree.

Cain stopped in front of Harry, “Thanks for the help.” Harry nodded and watched him dig for a box. Harry assumed, correctly, that it was a hidden spot for extra weapons.

“Um, I’m DG, and this is Harry, and this is…” He interrupted. “I know, a head case.” Harry snorted, but understood the need to take your pain out on others. “I’ll have you know I have a proper name.” Glitch looked down at him, “And when I remember it I’ll let you know.” Harry cocked a crooked grin at his friend and got one back. He didn’t care what Glitch’s name was.

“What’s a head case?” DG asked?

“It’s what the state does to reeducate criminals.” Glitch slumped and his eyes lost their joy. Harry grabbed his hand. It didn’t matter to him; his Glitch was a good person now. “Cain, are you a criminal?”

The man snarled at him. “So, what makes you think Glitch is?” A long silence, Harry held his gaze and only stopped when he got a nod. He squeezed Glitch’s hand.

They left him to his memories for a moment, but DG couldn’t hold it in when he said goodbye. “Hey actually were looking for a road, the brick route to central city? Do you know of it?”

“Yea…Zero…Actually that’s where I’m headed.” He said.

“Good,” Harry spoke, his voice brook no argument, “you will lead us to it.” Even though it was more of an order, Cain opened his mouth to argue, eyes flicking to the girl and Glitch. Harry softened his eyes, and put a hand on his shoulder. He understood, Cain was out for only revenge, but Harry wouldn’t let him leave alone, he’d follow him anyway. Cain lowered his head and nodded once, then snarled again and shrugged his hand off.

“Fine,” DG was obviously fed up, “we’ll find our way ourselves come one Glitch. Glitch followed, stomping a few steps before turning to look at Harry. He sighed and turned back to Cain who spoke, “The way? The way leads threw the forest of the Papey.” Glitch gasped. DG stopped and turned around. “What!” she threw a small tantrum about all that had happened to her so far. Harry couldn’t hold his chuckle. She was so young. He founded, she was older then him wasn’t she? ‘Ah I’ll think about it later. I still haven’t found a mirror to see what I look like now. Glitch said I looked 25. ’ Glitch grabbed his hand again and waited. He obviously didn’t want to go there without Cain.

“What’s the Papey?” Harry asked the cold man.

“I’ve seen them gnaw a person in half inside thirty seconds.” Glitch whimpered and buried his head in Harry’s neck. Cain sighed, “Zipper head keep your mouth shut, kid you stay behind Harry and me.”

Harry squeezed Glitch’s hand and winked at an irate DG. As they walked Harry constantly tapped Glitch to keep him from speaking. He smiled to take the sting out of it but knew he’d have to speak to his friend and explain. He was hit with a vision of a beautiful woman with dark hair in glamorous clothing.

She was looking at herself in the mirror but her actions in her reflection were different then the ones she was making. “You should have let me kill him, you’re letting thoughts of him distract you from our goal, we’re so close.”

She whimpered and sniffed, “I just miss him, I never got to hold him.”

The vision faded and he found himself looking into DG and Glitch’s concerned faces. Cain was waiting up the path a bit. Harry could tell that the man was worried even if he didn’t show it. “Its okay, I think I had a vision.” DG looked understanding and Harry wondered if she had visions too.

Glitch squeaked and held up the notebook. Harry chuckled darkly and said, “I don’t think we should put this down were it can be intercepted. I’ll tell you in a bit Glitch.” His friend smiled that smile, and it was all okay again.

They made it to the lands of the Papey with no other happenings of note, other then that Harry finally lost control of Glitch’s mouth. Everyone handles being tense differently, Harry got quiet and brooding, DG got belligerent, Cain got testy, and Glitch talked more and louder.

Cain stopped to clear a track, “two passed this way, ones limping.” DG cried out, “That’s my parents,” Immediately Harry shushed her, he didn’t like the feel of this place. It was dead, but it had feelings. Hunger. Need. Want. When DG spoke he had felt it change. Hope. He didn’t understand it. He wouldn’t let them have her. He still owed her his half of their bargain. Somehow he thought she came out better in this deal.

“They don’t like water, if they get close, you’ll know.” Cain whispered to them, but they all knew it was more for Harry. The two hardened men had a comradery that was easy and had settled fast.

They walked quickly and as quietly as possible. Harry didn’t even need to remind Glitch to remain silent. It was DG’s insatiable curiosity that was their undoing. “Hey, what’s that.” She reached out and touched a sizzling blue foam. She hissed as it burned her. “Shit kid. Don’t touch that.” Cain wrapped her hand in his hankerchief.

A pulsing blue nest caught her attention next. Making her ignore her pain. “That’s their dinner we need to get out of here.” Harry rolled his eyes at the puppy dog eyes both Glitch and DG gave him. He performed the cutting curse and a hairy animal fell out the slit. It immediately started roaring at them. Harry took in Cain’s unconcerned attitude, which changed when the man saw DG was scared. Harry heard a sound while Cain was posturing and pushed him out of the way. A stick covered dog like thing bit him and he grunted in pain. He’d had worse but this went right into his blood stream. Cain shot it and ordered them to run. Glitch tried to support Harry but he just pushed him aside. They ran, the hairy man Glitch and DG in front, Harry and Cain shooting spells and bullets at the animals respectively from behind.

They stopped at the edge of a cliff and Harry just growled and pushed them all over, casting bubble head charms on them as fast as he could. He and Cain first, followed by Glitch, DG. He didn’t manage to get the hairy one. They hit the water and he could see the other three with the spell trying to hold their breaths, he rolled his eyes at them and made exaggerated breathing noises. He grabbed onto Glitch, who’d probably forgotten how to swim, and the hairy one who didn’t have a charm. He couldn’t cast it under water. He frowned when he felt them being searched for. ‘Who could be looking for them?’ He was thankful when Cain took over helping Glitch.

Once on dry land, the bubble charms popped. “I love your magic Harry.” Glitch said from where his face was buried in his neck. Harry caught Cain’s longing gaze that turned into a sneer when he saw Harry watching, and smiled at him. He understood it would be weird for a man who had been watching his wife and son taken over and over for years. It would be harder for him then it was for Glitch and himself. Harry still wasn’t sure what their connection was. He’d never heard of anything like this back in London, but he was never one to think to long on things he couldn’t change. Besides whatever it was it made him content.

Cain got up to collect wood to make a fire and DG moved to help him. This left Harry and Glitch with the hairy thing. He sighed and sat up. Glitch was shivering and Harry couldn’t find it in himself to care more about the stranger then his Glitch. He watch Cain pile up the wood and struggle to get his flint out of his wet cloths. “Don’t bother.” Harry said and cast ‘Incendio’ on the pile. The others were use to Harry’s casual display of Magic, and although DG had made him prove it over and over and Cain had shivered the first few times, they didn’t even blink now, which was why the hairy one’s reaction was such a surprise.

“Sorcerer, Witch, Evil. You will take Raw back to the tower.” His words hurt Harry, even though he didn’t know what they meant really, he could assume. Glitch stood up to give him a small piece of his mind, but Cain stopped him. He pulled out his gun and pointed it at the man. “You are a viewer, he has magic. He’s not any more evil then you are. Now either come over here and get warm, or leave. We don’t need you bringing attention to us.” His cold words shocked everyone. DG looked at the new man with pity but didn’t contradict Cain. Eventually he crawled over to the fire. Glitch and DG made room for him.

Harry didn’t know what a viewer was, so he looked to Glitch for an answer. “Viewers are like seers but instead of seeing with their minds, they see with their hearts.” Harry hummed. That would suck, feeling all that. He couldn’t even handle his own feelings and the connection to Cain and Glitch. The hairy one fell asleep before Harry could find food, so Harry reached out to shake him when he got back. Just as he touched a furry shoulder, the man awoke with a scream.

Quickly Harry let go and backed away, hands up in supplication. Cain ran back from the forest, gun drawn. “What did I tell you about bringing attention?” They were all silent, waiting for any indication they’d been located. Nothing. Everyone relaxed.

Harry moved to the other side of the fire, between Cain and Glitch, and passed out the food he’d collected. Once it was eaten, and they were dry, they tried to get up to move before dark fell. The wound Harry sustained chose now to act up, driving him to his knees with a hiss. From very far away he heard Glitch and Cain’s worried voices, but he couldn’t respond. The haze of pain lifted after an indeterminate amount of time and he found the hairy one had healed him. “I’m Harry, you have to choose another name.” Glitch laughed, but Harry was so drugged on relief that he didn’t realize how it sounded. The man huffed and drew RAW in the sand by his hip. “Thank you for healing me Raw.” Raw nodded but didn’t remove his other hand from Harry’s leg. He said, “You have been betrayed.” Everyone froze but Raw continued, “You seek he who first loved you. He misses you.” Raw withdrew his hands. This time it was Harry who sought comfort from Glitch. The head case just held him. The others could see how torn up the two men were. Cain made the decision to just stay here for the night.

Harry eventually fell asleep. He’d not cried at all. Glitch wished he would. His thoughts were in turmoil. Harry was looking for a man who loved him first. Would Harry get rid of him when they found who he was looking for? No he promised, but then He could say the phrase and make Glitch forget. For the first time he wished he hadn’t given Harry an out.

Cain watched Glitch with uncertain eyes. What were these feelings he had for the headcase and sorcerer? So long locked up with only hate, pain, and rage. No way to move, or express himself. He didn’t have any compartments to put these two in. Harry was a warrior, he was a young man, 25 to 30 at least, sometimes he acted younger but he was strong. Glitch was 30 ish, still younger then him, a criminal, or not according to Harry, and annoying. None the less, he longed to touch them. He trusted Harry in a way he never had Adora, Harry could watch his back, could be depended on to make quick decisions. Glitch made him want to smile, something he thought would never happen again. He sat next to Glitch where he sat vigil over his friend. He knew what the headcase was thinking. It was beyond obvious that the man loved Harry, whether or not he remembered what it was called. It was equally obvious that Harry loved him back. He only hoped they weren’t intimate while he was around. Glitch needed reassurance that his love wouldn’t abandon him. Cain knew the chances of that happening, none to zero.

“Didn’t he say he was looking for his Godfather?” Immediately, Glitch’s countenance picked up. Good deed for the day done, Cain tried to stand up.

“Cain?” Glitch whispered. He relaxed in his seat, no longer trying to stand, “If I could trade, you I would.” That was all. It was enough. Cain nodded and ruffled Glitch’s hair. He didn’t see the sorcerer’s satisfied eyes, or DG’s smile.


AN: it might follow the movie completely I'm not sure yet