Troublesome

Sorry it's taken me so long to post this. It's been one fucked up week, that's all I can say. I'd love to explain all the sordid little details, but I do not believe that you are as interested in that as you are in reading the next bit of my story so I'll get straight to it. But, before I let you read on, I'd like to take the time to respond to my viewers who made my day by telling me they enjoyed my story, no matter how fucked up the past couple of days have been. I owe them that much.

auntbecky- No, this is not my first fanfiction. I have several others posted on a couple of other sites, but I can say that this one is the one I take the most pride in. It's one of those that I actually go back and read and it satisfies me. I do not feel the urge to go back and rewrite. I also enjoy writing it because it's very free and fluid and writes its self. But no, this is not my first attempt at writing a fanfic, but I hope that does not hinder your want to read more :).

ApollinaV- It really, really does my heart good to have some one who writes as well as you tell me that you like my story. I LOVE your story Always the Quiet Ones. But any way, seriously, I'm glad you liked it. The plot will pretty much unravel its self, so nothing too terribly complicated though the person who attempted suicide at the very beginning will not be revealed until the very last of the story. Some of it may catch you by surprise but it won't send you into a catatonic state, I promise. ;)

***


His eyes searched the room, looking around at all the faces. Evelyn hadn’t shown up yet. He waited, watching the door, expecting her to pop in at any given moment. The final bell rang; she’d be tardy if she showed up now. He had to start class; he wasn’t going to postpone his lessons because the wretched girl hadn’t shown up for class.

He’d written the bloody letter to her parents. That couldn’t be it. Besides, he’d seen her in the Great Hall that very morning, though she tried her best not to look at him.
Then it hit him; she was embarrassed. Then again, so was he. He thought the guilt would go away, but it hadn’t. He’d crossed a very thick forbidden line, trying to justify it as a good cause but really, there was just no good in defiling the girl.

Well, it wasn’t as if he took her virginity, though he may as well have. Then again, he wasn’t sure if she was even a virgin. Her mouth worked over him like she’d been sucking dick since before she could remember. She was a pro. But just because she’d sucked dick doesn’t mean she had gone all the way.

He needed to get his mind off of it; he had a class to teach.

He waved his wand at the black board and instructions appeared. He barked his orders and set them all to work.

The girl would have to wait after classes. It was time to be professional.

***
The Slytherin common room was not overtly crowded. It was a sunny late March evening and most of the students went outside to enjoy the spring. He had a feeling that Evelyn wouldn’t be amongst them. She was a loner. She had no friends as far as he could tell.
He made his way downstairs to the dormitory. He found the right door and knocked. It was the polite thing to do. It was the girls’ dormitory after all; one of them could be undressed for all he knew.

The door cracked open and a sliver of a face appeared. There was a small squeak and the door closed again.

He knocked once more, thoroughly annoyed
.
The door opened again, but this time all the way. The girl that faced him was the one he was seeking. She did not look him in the eye but took to staring at the floor.

“You weren’t in class, Miss Hewitt,” he said softly, trying to sound gentle and understanding, though he’d never perfected that.

“I’m sorry?” She offered, looking up at him, biting her wretched lip.

“I was just checking to see if you were alright.”

“I’m fine. Did I miss anything?”

He thought for a second. Perhaps…no… He refused to torture himself like that once more. He looked at her, looking him up and down, considering the very thing he was considering.

“Miss Hewitt, we need to talk.”

“About what?”

He didn’t answer her; she knew what he wanted to talk about. He grabbed her by her upper arm and drug her to his office. He locked the door soundly, and placed a few silencing charms on the door, to avoid a nasty situation if some one happened to over hear.

He drew up a chair in front of his desk, and implied with a nod of his head that he wanted her to sit. He wouldn’t face her; he couldn’t. He didn’t even know where to start.

“Professor, if this is about me missing class, it won’t happen again,” Evelyn started.

He shook his head.

“No, I can’t say that I blame you. I wouldn’t have shown up either,” he said. It was the truth. In fact he had considered not showing up himself, but he was a teacher, she was a student. It was easier for her. “Evelyn, I wanted to apologize to you. What I had you do, that was very wrong. I cannot imagine the regret you must feel and I’m sorry that I’m the cause of it.”

“I don’t regret it. You saved me from having a miserable life. It was worth it.”

Severus turned, a bit taken aback.

“I’d do it again, too,” she said, a devilish smile playing on her lips.

“Miss Hewitt…”

“I’m not going to lie. I enjoyed myself. And from the look on your face, you were satisfied.”

He blinked at her, not quite believing what he was hearing.

“You’re very handsome,” she continued. Now she was just being a sycophant.

“I hardly believe that.”

“I think so.”

“You must be very lonely.”

“Aren’t you?”

He narrowed his eyes suspiciously. She seemed to realize that she’d crossed a line. She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath.

“What I meant is that not everyone is one hundred percent content all the time. You just seem very distant that’s all,” she explained. “Me, I’m perfectly happy being alone and I assume you must be too or else you wouldn’t be that way, but you have to admit that you do enjoy good company every once in a while.”

Well, no, he could not deny it, but what business of it was hers? He grew uneasy. It would be a cold day in hell before he discussed his personal life with a student.

“Miss Hewitt, I hardly think that this is appropriate,” he said, turning away from her again, leaning up against the back bookshelf, using his arm to support his wait.

“Professor Snape, I believe that we’re way past appropriate.”

“Point well taken, but I still do not think I should discuss my inner most feelings with you,” he said, sneering a bit.

“Why? Are you scared that I’m going to tell some one?”

Well, yes, really that was it. He let his silence do the talking for him.

“Tell me, Professor, who am I supposed to tell? In case you haven’t noticed, I don’t have any friends.”

Truth could be a mother fucker, especially if it wasn’t good truth and it came straight from the horse’s mouth. No, she had no friends. She was rather homely in the sense that she did not conform to the standards set by her peers. But she seemed to be happy none the less. It wasn’t that anyone went out of their way to avoid her; they just didn’t care to get close to her. Really, he could see why. She made him feel alienated.

Well that was his doing; it wasn’t entirely her fault.

“At any rate, I wouldn’t want to pry too much into your personal life. I might not like what I find,” she concluded.

She was smart to shut up.

“Miss Hewitt, do you know what we’ve done?”

“I’m perfectly aware.”

He winced.

“I meant what we’ve done to ourselves. We’ve condemned ourselves. It cannot happen again. I do not think I could live with myself knowing that I’ve…” He couldn’t continue. He wasn’t quite sure how to tell a seventeen year old that he lusted after her.

“That you’ve taken the last bit of my childhood away from me?” Evelyn added, a teasing note in her voice. Despite himself, he smiled. It was a good thing that she couldn’t see his face or he might have to kill her for witnessing such a legendary event. He hardly smiled genuinely. Perhaps there was something more to this girl than he’d thought.

“Exactly,” he said, with a gulp. He turned to face her again. To his surprise, she was standing.

“You want to go down to the Great Hall and have a spot of supper with me? I haven’t eaten yet and I’m sure no one else is in there by now.”

As much as he wanted to say no, he couldn’t. He nodded his head once and unlocked the door. He followed her to go eat supper. He was hungry.

***

“Professor Snape,” some one called after him. He turned around slowly to see Professor Lupin trailing after him. Well, if this wasn’t a surprise. It was a couple of days until full moon, and surely Lupin was after his monthly dose of Wolfsbane potion.

He toyed with the idea of just ignoring the teacher, but no, he had to stop. He had to give him the potion or else he’d be putting the entire school in mortal danger. There were a few people he could live with out, but really, it’d be a huge mess. He didn’t particularly care for cleaning up blood and entrails.

The tired looking man approached him.

“You know where my stores are at, Lupin,” he said with a sneer. He didn’t like interacting with this man at all and minimal contact was ideal.

“I know, but that’s not what this is about.”

“I’ve got a class to teach in ten minutes so do make haste and say what you have to say or else I’m afraid I’m going to have to leave rather abruptly and rudely. I am never late.”

Lupin nodded his head.

“I understand, but Severus-“ Lupin started, but Severus cut him off.

“While we are standing in open hallways of the school in earshot of students, you are to refer to me as Professor or Snape or a combination of both,” Severus sneered. Lupin seemed nonplussed.

“Right, Professor. I wanted to ask you about Evelyn Hewitt.”

Severus blanched. Had the insufferable werewolf found out? If he had, he was in deep trouble.

He willed himself to act natural; act as though she was nothing to him.

But it would be a lie.

She was something him, no matter how hard he tried to fight it, there was just something about her…

“What about Miss Hewitt?” That sounded natural, or so he thought. Well maybe now that he’d thought about it, his voice probably did seem some what constrained. Lupin gave him an odd look. Severus cleared his throat, and tried to relax.

“Well, it’s nothing really; I thought maybe you knew a little more about her since she’s from your house.”

“Indeed, she is,” he replied dryly and looked at his pocket watch, a nonverbal sign that he wished Lupin to hurry up and make his point.

“Well,” Lupin said, still staring strangely at him. “It’s just that she doesn’t seem to have any friends, and I worry. Do you know if she’s having problems at home?”

The both of them, Severus knew, were not strangers to growing up in a dysfunctional family, and he could see where the concern was coming from. He’d felt that way himself a couple of times after spending time, talking with her. He let her come to his office and clean it up for him. She did a much more personal job than the elves did, and he felt safer having her clean his belongings than the elves. He'd never really learned to trust elves. They creeped him out.

She was a wonderful conversationalist.

It really was a wonder that she didn’t have more friends than she did. But then again it shouldn’t have surprised him. Kids her age didn’t care about current events or what was going on around them. Really all they cared about was the opposite sex and in some cases the same sex.

“As far as I know, she has a normal home life. If she is having troubles at home, she does a good job hiding it.”

“Right, well, I thought I’d ask. See you around, Professor.”

Before Severus could respond, Lupin had already turned the opposite direction and was gone. Severus scoffed. He felt a little bit threatened that Lupin had asked about Evelyn. It was a bit odd, but he felt oddly protective over her. He stalked off, not really sure what to make of it all.

***

That night, Evelyn graced his office once more so that she could reorganize his bookshelf, by author name. Not to say that it was disorganized before, but he’d done arranged it by title and subject and it got a little confusing sometimes. He needed a refreshing change so he did not object when she offered.

It had been about two weeks since she’d climbed down on her knees and degraded herself using his body as a tool. He rather enjoyed her company now, but he let her do all the talking. It never went further than talking, much to Severus’ relief, but there was always that hanging over them.

He knew she wanted him. He could tell by the way she looked at him.

It was hard to tell him self that he didn’t want her, because he did. He wanted her for his own selfish purposes and it took all of his will power to not to kiss her soundly like he wanted to.

The feelings, they scared him more than anything. There was no excuse for him to feel so close to a student. As a teacher, it was his duty to make sure that all of his students felt at home, like they could rely on him, but he’d been missing in action for that part.
The girl needed him.

Maybe he needed her.

“Professor, do you have a ladder?”

He looked up at her; she was trying to reach the shelf that was just beyond her reach.

“Use your wand, Evelyn.”

A simple solution for a simple problem, it seemed. Evelyn blushed.

“I left it in the dorm.”

He raised an eye brow at her; a wand was like a fifth appendage, he found it incredible that anyone could leave it anywhere. He kept his on his immediate person at all times. He sighed heavily and stood. He took the book from her and placed it on the shelf that the rather short girl could not reach. He looked down at her, now very aware of how short she was compared to him.

“I think it’s time that you head off to bed, Miss Hewitt,” he said after a couple of moments of staring at each other. Indeed, it was nearly eleven o clock.

“Tomorrow is Saturday, sir. I don’t have anywhere I need to be, besides I’m no where near finished.”

“Be that as it may, I have plans. So off to bed with you.”

Evelyn surveyed him for a couple of moments.

“Can I stay here?”

“And where do you plan on sleeping, Miss Hewitt?”

“In your bed.”

“Where am I supposed to sleep, Miss Hewitt?”

“In your bed.”

Severus shook his head vigorously.

“No, absolutely not.”

“I get lonely and besides, it’s so cold down there. I don’t see the harm…”

“The harm, Miss Hewitt? A student in bed with a teacher? A teacher of the opposite sex for that matter. That will go over well,” he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. Evelyn grew flustered; obviously frustrated that she could not get her way. He was tired of letting her get her way; she’d wormed her way into his life and suddenly there was no way he could get rid of her.

“You’ve got nerve, Miss Hewitt, but my final word is no,” he said, glaring darkly at her. Evelyn’s jaw clenched and she didn’t move a muscle.

“What if I refused?”

The wretched girl was too bloody bullheaded for her own good. Didn’t she know who she was talking to? No one stood up to Snape and defied a direct order from him and lived to tell the tale.

“Miss Hewitt, have you forgotten that you’re unarmed and I’m not?” he said, grinning sadistically at her. This would be fun.

“I’ve got two fists; I know how to use them.”

Severus threw back is head and laughed at her. It was a cruel thing to do, but he couldn’t help himself. Her fists, that was rich.

He was so busy laughing at her; he didn’t see her charge at him.

He whirled around just in time to see her face and her fist clenched at her side. He grew fearful for a moment, closing his eyes, waiting for the blow to come, but it didn’t. What he felt were her lips on his own. What he felt was her arms snaking around his neck. What he felt was him self melting into her, kissing her back.

It felt wonderful.

Yet it was worse than having her hit him. He couldn’t punish her for a kiss.

He found himself wrapping his arms underneath her thighs, hoisting her up so she could reach his lips better.

Merlin, she was a good kisser.

Not that he really had anyone to compare her to.

Why was he even considering letting her have her way? Damn her! The manipulative little bitch!

He dropped her and she fell with a thud on the cold stone floor. She looked up at him, her face full of smug satisfaction. It took everything to not kick her where she laid.
“What in the hell are you trying to accomplish, Miss Hewitt?” he hissed at her, seething with anger.

“You can’t deny what you feel, sir.”

“You don’t know what in the hell you’re talking about!”

“I know exactly what I’m talking about! I see it! I see it when you look at me! Don’t you dare try and lie to me!”

“OUT!” he roared at her. She remained rooted to the spot.

“No, not until you tell me the truth.”

There was never a student that he’d come across, not even Potter, that he seriously considered killing. That was until Evelyn Hewitt invaded his life and refused to leave him alone. He drew his wand and pointed it at her. It was aimed at her heart.

“Get.Out.Of.My.Office,” he said, slowly, giving her fair warning. Evelyn stared at him for a second, and then shook her head, the defiant gleam in her eye sparkling like a challenge. She dared him to do it. So he did.

“Crucio!”

It had slipped out before he knew what he was doing. She shrieked in agony, her body stiffening as the curse hit her. Her screams brought him back to his senses. He looked at his wand, slowly, and then at her, realizing what he’d done. He was horrified with himself. He dropped his wand and rushed to her side.

He felt her cheeks, they were cold with sweat. Her eyes were closed and she was breathing laboriously. At least she was still breathing. That’s all he cared about. Her eyes fluttered open.

“I didn’t think you’d do it,” she said, softly. Severus was so relieved to hear her voice; he engulfed her in a large hug.

“Evelyn, I cannot possibly tell you how sorry I am…I didn’t mean…” his voice trailed off, his voice thick with tears. Evelyn grabbed one of his hands and kissed it softly.

“So don’t tell me,” she whispered. “Show me.”

“I can’t.”

She stared deep into his eyes, and pushed a lock of lank greasy hair out of his face.

“It’s just you and me, Professor. There’s nobody else here. “

“You don’t understand, Evelyn. It’s wrong!”

“Define right, then.”

No one had ever desired him before. Really, he couldn’t see what she saw in him.

“Love is blind, Professor.”

He bent and picked her up, and she groaned. The curse was known to leave long term repercussions, he wasn’t taking any chances. He’d shot himself right in the foot.
He hoisted her to his living quarters that were hidden behind a door way cleverly disguised by a wall. He pressed a free palm to it and the stones began to collapse, revealing a small room complete with a mattress propped off the floor on a box spring and a small wardrobe. He deposited Evelyn on the bed softly and began to search her body of any physical wounds she might have obtained while she was trashing about on the floor, or when he had dropped her.

“I’m alright, really, Professor. I’m a little sore, but alright.”

He still continued to examine her, he wasn’t taking any risks. There was a small bruise on her back, and when he pressed a finger to it, she groaned, but there wasn’t much he could do for a bruise except let it heal on its own.

“I take it I’ll be staying the night here after all?”

He could have slapped her; she’d managed to get her way in the end.

Didn’t she realize that no matter what she felt for him and no matter what he felt for her, it wouldn’t be right in anyone’s eyes? Love was blind, indeed. No one accepted anything anymore. People weren’t happy unless they had some one else to look down their noses at just so they could ignore their own disappointing lives.

“I suppose so, Miss Hewitt. But I will be finding elsewhere to sleep,” he said quietly.

“Like where?”

“I suppose I could find a bed down in the hospital wing if it came straight down to it.”
Evelyn didn’t say anything.

“Or you could set aside your pride and stay here.”

“Or I could do that.”

The mind tricks she pulled! What was wrong with him? He was too intellectual to let the petty tricks of a teenaged girl trip him. He grudgingly laid down beside her, stiffening as she struggled to turn over on her side to get a better look at him.

“You know…” she started. He could tell by the way she hesitated to finish her sentence that it would more than likely be some thing that he would object to. “They say sexual intercourse is the best cure for any ailment.”

Well, it was true. It relieved a lot of stress, strengthened the immunity system and was great exercise…but it together and…wait. Why was he even considering? There was no possible way he would be able to live with himself…

“What you are implying is completely foolish. I cannot and will not have sex with my student!”

She raised an eyebrow at him. He could have hit himself.

“I performed oral sex on you. Sex is sex is sex, Professor, no matter which orifice of mine your dick was penetrating.”

“You have strange principles, Miss Hewitt.”

She gave him a silly grin.

“It’s only because you see them that way. They make perfect sense to me and if you thought about it you’d see that I was right.”

“You’re also very cocky, Miss Hewitt.”

“I’m a Slytherin. We’ve all got a large ego; you should know this, Professor.”

“Indeed.”

It did no good to try and get out of it. Once she got into her thick brain she wanted something, she’d do anything to get it. Admitting defeat was hard for him but was giving in really considered defeat? If he didn’t put up a fight then would it be considered a loss? Did people who agreed with some one else though it was clear that it was wrong really lose in the end?

The way she was staring at him made it clear that she was ready for another fight.

“You realize that by doing this that there is no turning back?”

“Sure, I know. I mean it’s not like it would be my first time.”

He knew. She’d told him about her previous boyfriend, an older man, a friend of her father's who had used her and then broke it off with her so he could go back to his wife. She said she hadn’t been heart broken because she knew deep down that he loved his wife more than her and she was okay with it. She had said his wife and he were made for each other. Evelyn had just been an escape.

Severus wondered if Evelyn had used the same sort of mind control on the married man that she’d used on Severus himself. It wouldn’t have surprised him in the least.

After coming terms to the fact that before the night was over he’d have bedded a student, Severus suddenly felt a lot better about the to be events and even grew a bit aroused.

Any shred of doubt lingered vanished as Evelyn took his hand and guided it down her face, neck, breasts, stomach and lastly down her skirt to her crotch. It rested for a second, not really sure what it should do. He could feel the heat rising off her crotch.

At that moment he wished he were some one else. Perhaps if he were some one else, he wouldn’t be feeling the guilt. The mixture of guilt and lust were surely going to be the death of him.

“I have an idea…” he whispered as he withdrew his hand.

“What are you doing?”

“Repaying the favor,” he said, as he slid down, shifting as lightly as possible, finally resting between her legs. His legs hung awkwardly off the end of the bed that was a smidgen too short.

“But it was you who did me a favor.”

“Perhaps, but consider this an official sign of gratitude.”

He slid his hands up her thighs, making sure to only lightly graze her skin. Goosebumps arose from their porous graves like corpses that weren’t really corpses. Ring a bell, get dug up. His thumbs slid under the elastic waist band of her panties and he pulled them down and off with one fluid motion.

It was then that Severus realized that the girl laying before him was not a girl at all. She was a young woman.

During his time as a teacher Severus had come to realize the importance of getting to know his students. He did not pride in seeing them grow, that was their parents’ job. Evelyn was an example of why he kept that strict code.

He didn’t want that, not like that, not then, not there…

But he nuzzled into her groin and causing her to moan.

She tasted sweet and salty on his lips…she smelled almost of perfume…

As he applied pressure with his tongue, her grasp on his hair tightened, shifting his head to where she wanted him.

He was her slave…

“Oh my god,” she moaned, writhing about in her orgasmic splendor. “Higher, no not lower, higher, damn it!”

She dug her fingernails into his scalp and forced him to the right spot.

He almost laughed at her desperation. Perhaps it wasn’t a nice thought but then again Severus Snape was not a nice man. It was one of those qualities he’d learned to love about himself.

In one sticky gush, Evelyn came.

“That,” she said as he unearthed himself from her crotch and found his spot on a pillow beside her. “Was the most amazing thing I’ve ever experienced.”

“The women don’t call me Snape the Snake for no reason,” he said, his ego a bit inflated. Evelyn lightly punched his shoulder.

“You’re a liar.”

“So maybe I am.”

They lay still and quiet for a couple of moments. It was one of those silences that were awkward and heavy. There was a question, a statement, going unheard.

Evelyn finally asked, relieving the tension in the air. Severus lived for it.

“So…are we?”

“Are we what?”

“You know perfectly well what I mean,” she said, giving him a strange smile, a mistrusting smile. Severus was not a stupid man and it did him no good to feign ignorance, especially with Evelyn around.

“I believe we just did.”

“That was not sex, Professor. I do believe one who is educated at your level would know that.”

He smiled smugly at her.

“Sex is sex is sex, Miss Hewitt. Now go to sleep, I’ve got plans in the morning and it won’t do to have you talking my ear off all night long.”

He turned over, and smiled to himself, ignoring the girl’s sputtering of frustration and contempt. He had her in a bind and there was no way she was getting out of it.

He was Severus Effing Snape.