Songfic Series

Title: End of Heartache
Author: alleycat88
Summary: Songfic based on "End of Heartache" by Killswitch Engage
Rating: NC-17 Language, M/M, Major Character Death, angst
Pairing(s): Harry/Draco

Author's Notes:

The story didn't turn out the way I had it planned in my head...I think it turned out better! Review and let me know!

Seek me, call me
I’ll be waiting

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Draco stared at the flames flickering in the fireplace, sipping a glass of wine. His were eyes hard and cold. He snarled in a rage and threw the glass into the flames, his face distorted in his anger. He screamed and howled as he tore up the room from top to bottom. He stopped when his hand closed around a picture on his desk. A picture barely a year old…a picture of better times.

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This distance, this dissolution
I cling to memories while falling
Sleep brings release, and the hope of a new day
Waking the misery of being without you

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*Dream*

Harry smiled up at Draco as Draco wrapped his arms around him. Draco’s eyes softened as his lover met his eyes.

“Harry….promise me…promise me that you will never leave me!” Harry smiled at him and caressed his face softly, his eyes bright with a hint of sadness. Draco brought them closer, their foreheads touching as they stood in the snow outside the school.

“Draco. You know I can’t promise you that. The war….Voldemort…I don’t know what will happen to me…or you. But I can promise this, I will love you…always.” Harry smiled softly, his arms reaching up to encircle Draco’s neck as he stood up on his tiptoes for a kiss. Draco leaned down to meet his petite lovers lips. In that moment all the worries of the war, school, and family fell away as Draco held the person he cherished in his arms.


*Dream*

Harry moaned softly as Draco’s tongue wrapped around the head of his cock. Draco looked up to watch Harry’s face as he pleasured him. His face and body were flushed, his brilliant green eyes glazed over with lust, his legs spread open for his blonde lover like a present for him. Harry gasped as his release came, pleasure rolling through his body from his head to his toes. Draco smirked and he swallowed all of his lover’s essence. Harry panted, his whole body lax, as he tried to regain his breath. Draco brought himself up eye to eye with him. Harry blushed and turned his head. Draco chuckled and nuzzled him, whispering into his ear.

“I love you…”


*Dream*

Draco gasped as Harry clenched around his cock, causing him to nearly spill inside him. Harry lay on his back, his legs thrown over Draco’s shoulders, his hands clenching the sheets beneath him as he moaned and writhed beneath Draco. Draco pulled out and slowly thrust back in. Harry keened in the back of his throat, his body trembling with need. Draco trembled as well; he didn’t know how much longer he could hold back. He started as he felt Harry’s hand upon his cheek. He stared into his eyes, reassuring him he was alright and could now do what he liked. Draco grabbed the soft hand and kissed the palm hungrily. He began to pump in and out of Harry slowly at first, but then faster and harder as he heard Harry’s encouraging moans. He looked like a fallen angel. His dark hair spilling across his brilliant green eyes, his pale skin flushed and covered in a fine sheen of sweat, his pink lips trembling as moan after moan spilled from them like water from the skies. Draco felt Harry contract around him again and knew he was close. He let himself go as he thrust into the boy beneath him, his name falling from his lips as he came inside him.

*End Dreams*


Draco awoke with a gasp. He immediately reached to the side of him and found…nothing, nobody was here. He covered his face and screamed, his tears splashing onto his pale skin. No, of course he wouldn’t be here. Why would he be? He had left him, all alone in his misery and pain. Sleep was all he ever did nowadays…it helped relieve the pain he felt. He glanced towards his desk again and stared at the picture….These memories would never leave him…no matter how hard he tried.

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Surrender, I give in
Another moment is another eternity

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Draco was in front of the fire once again, his eyes glossy and red. He sipped on another glass of wine as he stared at the door to the next room. They had shared that room once…and now he was gone. It seemed like an eternity ago…when really it had only been a year. Draco rose from the chair and got into bed, surrendering himself to blissful sleep.

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(Seek me) For comfort, (Call me) For solace
(I'll be waiting) For the end of my broken heart
(Seek me) Completion, (Call me) I'll be waiting
(I'll be waiting) For the end of my broken heart

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*Dream*

“But if we get separated where will I find you!? You can’t leave! We can’t be separated!” Draco shook as the walls around Hogwarts crumbled under the weight of the Deatheaters’ curses. Harry smiled, his clothes were bloody and he was covered in only Merlin knows what but when he smiled Draco thought he had never looked more beautiful.

“Just seek me out, call for me, I’ll be waiting for you Draco.” Harry turned and ran for the doors, leaving Draco behind, screaming his name.


*Dream*

“Harry! Oh baby! Please, please wake up! Somebody help!” Draco knelt in the mud, holding on to the nearly lifeless body of his love. Harry was breathing, but barely. His attack on the Dark Lord had nearly killed him and he now struggled to stay alive. Draco cried out in happiness as Harry opened his eyes and smiled at him.

“Oh thank Merlin! You’re alive!” Harry chuckled softly.

“I couldn’t very well die! I had another life to think about as well…” Harry’s hand traveled down to his stomach and Draco’s eyes widened in comprehension.

“You mean?”

“Yes.”

*End Dreams*


Draco lay in bed as memory after memory passed through his mind. Harry eating. Harry sleeping. Harry smiling. Harry laughing. Harry crying. Harry…pregnant with their child. Draco broke down as the last thought flew through his mind. No matter how much he called for him…Harry never came. He had left him incomplete.

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You know me, you know me all too well
My only desire - to bridge our division

In sorrow I speak your name
And my voice mirrors, mirrors my torment

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*Dream*

“Damnit Draco! What do you want from me?! I am having this baby! And you can’t stop me!”

“But the medi-witch said…”

“Fuck her! And fuck you! If you don’t want this baby then say it!” Harry stood, five months pregnant, in front of Draco trembling with rage and sadness. His green eyes threatening to spill tears at any moment. Draco wrapped his arms around him.

“Ssshh. I know. I do want the baby, I just don’t want to lose you. We’ll just be careful, okay?” Harry nodded as his fingers dug into Draco’s shoulders as he leaned into the embrace.

*End Dream*


Draco sat in his room. He held the picture in his hands and stared at it. He choked back a sob as he spoke his lover’s name, anguish and rage thick in his voice.

“Harry…”

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(Seek me) For comfort, (Call me) For solace
(I'll be waiting) For the end of my broken heart
(Seek me) Completion, (Call me) I'll be waiting
(I'll be waiting) For the end of my broken heart

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*Dream*

“Draco! Help me…I think..I think it’s time.” Draco rushed to Harry’s side as Harry stumbled through the doorway of their bedroom.

“Okay Harry. We’re flooing to St.Mungo’s and there the medi-witch will take care of everything.”

They arrived at St.Mungo’s only for Harry to pass out in the lobby. Draco yelled for a medi-witch and was immediately surrounded by them. They began to take Harry out of the room and Draco followed.

The room was scary and filled with the sounds of Harry’s screams as he had awoke from being unconscious. Draco rushed to his side and grabbed his hand. Harry gripped it tight as contraction after contraction hit him. The medi-witches began to shake their heads and Draco knew something had gone wrong. They asked him to leave so they could perform their duties but Draco asked for one more moment.

“Harry remember what you told me that day on the battlefield?” Harry grimaced and let out a loud yell, but then smiled at Draco.

“Seek me out, call for me…I’ll be waiting for you...” Harry gasped aloud at the pain.

“Yes, baby. I have to leave now but if you need me…you know what to do.” Draco smiled shakily at Harry, kissed his forehead, and left the room, never knowing that would be the last time he would ever hear his lover’s voice.

*End Dream*


Draco opened his eyes. Another dream…another dream. He turned on his side and stared at the door to the next room. The room he never had the courage to enter.

“I’m still waiting…Harry.”

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Am I breathing?
My strength fails me
Your picture, a bitter memory

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*Dream*

Draco fell to his knees, shaking his head.

“Nooo…No…NO!” He screamed at the medi-witch who had delivered the news. He gasped as he felt his chest constrict. He couldn’t breathe…he felt his strength leave him as he fell to the floor.

*End Dream*


Draco awoke as he fell out of the bed and hit the floor. He lay there panting, his face wet with tears. He noticed the picture had fallen off the desk and now lay beside him. He picked it up and stared at it again. The picture had been taken the day before the birth and Harry had never looked more alive than he did then. His cheeks were flushed, his eyes sparkled, and he glowed as picture Draco picked him up and kissed him so he wouldn’t have to tiptoe. Picture Harry waved at him and kissed picture Draco again. The snow fell softly around them, creating a winter wonderland, their winter wonderland.

Draco felt fresh tears fall down as he realized that Harry was gone…and he was never coming back. He wiped them away and setting the picture down walked into the room next to his. It was time to face his guilt, his rage, his fears.

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For comfort, for solace

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Draco had wondered why Harry had not called out for him for the longest time, until a medi-witch explained it to him. It was either him…or the baby. They could only save one. And Harry had refused to call out for Draco…knowing that Draco would choose him over their baby. Draco sighed. He would have been right.

Draco stared at his daughter as she lay asleep in her bassinet. Her dark hair spilling across her forehead…much like her father’s once had. She opened her eyes and smiled at him. Her brilliant emeralds shined up at him as she lifted her tiny arms up, making little gurgling noises that only babies could. He smiled down at her and lifted her up. She sighed and slowly drifted back to sleep. Her little hand curled in his hair. He sobbed again as he sat in a rocking chair next to her bassinet.

How could he have been so selfish…His daughter was being raised by house elves while he watched her life pass him by. He smoothed her curls over her forehead and kissed her softly. He now knew where he could have found his comfort all along….Here with her.

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(Seek me) For comfort, (Call me) For solace
(I'll be waiting) For the end of my broken heart
(Seek me) Completion, (Call me) I'll be waiting
(I'll be waiting) For the end of my broken heart

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Draco stood in front of a white tombstone holding his daughter’s hand. She was four now and had the makings of being a great witch..her powers were amazing and she was so smart. She amazed him whenever she talked…she reminded him so much of Harry. She seemed to know things that he never knew she knew; things about the past, things about the future, things about him and Harry…just like Harry had.

“Daddy…don’t be sad. Daddy says he sorry…he’s sorry for not calling for you.” Draco felt his heart constrict as he turned to stare down at his daughter. How had she known that?

“He says he’s sorry for making you wait but he needs you here..with me.” Draco choked back a sob as he knelt down in front of his daughter and hugged her

“I know sweetie…and I’m not going anywhere. If I ever leave you I want you to seek me out, call for me and I’ll be waiting for you...” His daughter smiled at him and wrapped her little arms around his neck so he could pick her up. He took one last look at the tombstone.

*Harry…I will wait for the day when you call for me. Until then…my love*

Draco walked away with his daughter in his arms. Lily smiled and waved. Draco chuckled.

“Who are you waving at Lily?” Lily shook her head.

“It’s a secret Daddy!”

*I’ll be waiting for you…..Draco…Lily* Harry smiled at the family, his eyes bright, and then disappeared.