Why Fred and George Will Never Eavesdrop Again ...

Why Harry Doesn’t Look Snape in the Eye … Ever.

“It really is becoming quite annoying.” Lupin griped, noisily licking his fingers.

“More annoying than usual.” Snape added with a satisfactory crunch.

“Really. I’m starting to think we’re lepers or something.” Black added reaching into the crinkling bag.

“They’re all so skittish. I can practically smell their fear.” Lupin added.

“Even Dumbledore seems to be avoiding being alone with us, not that I’m complaining, mind you.” Snape continued as he waited for Black to remove his paw from the bag.

“Remus, you say they dunk these in that?” Sirius asked for clarification, motioning to the tub of red tomato, pepper and onion goo the wolf had brought back with him.

“Yes. It’s called salsa they say.” Remus answered him

“Salsa? Isn’t that some form of dance?” Snape added as he dipped the white corn triangle into the tomato mixture.

“I think so.” Black added.

Harry snuck past the portrait of Mrs. Black. He had pulled the short straw and had been sent for the midnight snack. He needed to find something good to erase all the disturbing images from his mind; all swirling haphazardly around with his teenaged hormones spurred by Fred and George’s whispered discussions about his Godfather, and the two professors.

“GAAAAAHHHHH!” Snape hollered. “I can’t bloody believe you let me put that in my mouth!”

Harry’s face fell. His eyes wide, he bolted for the safety of the second floor. Bloody hell. I am not that hungry.

"What the hell does chipotle mean anyway?" Sirius pondered curious, but definitely not curious enough to taste the stuff after Snape's reaction. "Man is your face red, Snape." He laughed.

Snape, after downing a huge glass of pumpkin juice, grimacing horribly, sputtered in his own defense. "Apparently chipotle is some sort of muggle torture term meaning remove entire layers of one's taste buds in one go."

Remus threw his head back laughing. Sirius joined him, nearly guffawing himself straight on to the floor. Snape scowled at the salsa, wishing he could dock house points from both former Gryffindors.

Okay, I lied. I’m not done. Any suggestions folks?