The Usual Suspects

I felt like an idiot, but he'd picked a time, and I was available. It wasn't until class ended and I was making my way to the common room that I realized I could have said no. I didn't have to go out with Draco Malfoy.

I stopped in my tracks. Was it a date? It would be broad daylight after all. Someone bumped into me on his way past and I started walking again. I'd have to tell Cho sooner or later if it turned out it really was a date. Unless he didn't like me. Then I wouldn't have to worry about it.

Eventually I found my way down to the common room and sat to begin the homework Snape had assigned. I had quite a long free period, including lunch, before my next class. I spent most of that time writing about the importance of nonverbal spells in defencive magic. When I finished, I had a quarter hour till the bell would ring for double Potions. I tucked my parchment away, but before I could switch out the books in my bag for the next class, Megan Jones had entered the common room in a hurry, calling for me.

"Mary, Professor Sprout needs to see you about something," she huffed.

"What? Do you know why?"

"No, but she says you're excused from Potions."

My heart sank. I'd miss my favourite class. "Thanks, Megan," I mumbled. I grabbed up my bookbag anyway. Maybe Professor Sprout would let me go early and I could still make it to class.

I got to her office just as the bell rang for class. I gave a quick prayer of thanks that it wasn't Professor Snape teaching Potions. He had no tolerance for tardiness, excused or otherwise. I knocked lightly on the office door, half hoping she wouldn't hear me and I could pretend she hadn't been in her office when I came.

Unfortunately, the door opened right away.

The Headmaster stood on the other side, his face lined with more than age, but sadness or sympathy as well. Professor Sprout sat on a low, squashy couch against one wall, lips pressed together.

"Come in," the Headmaster said.

I entered warily, and he waved me over to the couch beside Professor Sprout. I sat, dropping my bookbag to the floor beside me. "What is it?" I asked. "Is something wrong with my schedule?"

The Headmaster sat in an armchair beside the couch, folding his hands on his knee. He looked expectantly at Professor Sprout, and she turned to me, taking my hands in hers. "Mary, dear," she said, then paused for a breath. "This morning, your mother was found in the cellar of your home with severe injuries. Your father rushed her to St. Mungo's, but they were unable to save her."

The room was silent as I tried to absorb what I'd heard. Professor Sprout continued, "it appeared that her injuries were...self inflicted." She squeezed my hands, but hers felt clammy against mine. "Your father would be here with you, but he is arranging for a quiet funeral as quickly as possible." She released my hands, reaching into her pocket. "He sent this note." She pulled out a folded square of parchment and held it out.

I stared for a moment, feeling rather numb, before I took it. It was unsealed, and not in an envelope. Whatever it said, it had already been read. Professor Sprout and Headmaster Dumbledore already knew what it said.

The Headmaster stood, and Professor Sprout did as well. "We'll leave you to read that in peace," she said. There are tissues on the table here, and you may stay as long as you like. You are excused from your classes for the remainder of the week.

I forced a smile and nodded as she and the Headmaster headed for the door. I heard the latch click and unfolded the parchment, my fingers shaking so badly that it took at least a full minute to get it open so that I could read it. It was my father's handwriting, small, tight letters fenced between large, round capitals.

MarySue, I read. I had the briefest thought that it wasn't Dear MarySue, and that he'd used my full name at all.

It is for the best that you remain at Hogwarts this term, including the winter break.

Love, Father

That was it. I turned the paper over, looking for more, then re-read it a few times. No explanation, nothing. I didn't even get to go to my mother's funeral. The first tear slipped down my cheek, and I suddenly felt as though my lungs were caving in. I reached blindly for the tissues, grabbing a handful and burying my face, sobbing, wondering if I could drown myself in tears, afraid I'd only hyperventilate.

What had happened? My mother was fine when I left. She kissed me goodbye on the platform, though she knew it embarrassed me. My parents loved each other. Wasn't that enough?

When no more tears would come, I picked up my bookbag and stood. I had missed potions completely. I hoped I could catch Cho between classes.

I left Professor Sprout's office and headed up to where 7th-year Charms was letting out. Cho was talking with Eddie Carmichael, but when she saw me, she quickly excused herself.

"Mary, what's wrong?" she asked, and she looked so worried for me that I began to cry again.

"I...I'll tell you later...after supper...can you meet me by the hourglasses after supper?"

"Yeah, of course. Are you going to be alright?"

I nodded, though in truth I wasn't sure. "I'll be fine. Don't worry for me. I'll tell you later." I took off down the corridor and headed for the girls' dormitory, where I spent the remainder of the afternoon.

At supper time, I was lying in bed staring at the draperies. Their usual cheerful yellow color seemed garish and hateful. I finally went upstairs, and though my stomach growled, I didn't want to eat. I stood by the hourglasses and waited.

"Mary," I heard, and turned to see Cho coming toward me. "Didn't you eat?"

I shook my head.

"Are you ready to talk?"

"Can we go somewhere?"

"Sure, wherever you want to go," Cho replied.

"I don't know," I said. "I don't know where to go. You decide."

"We could sit by the lake. It's not quite dark yet."

"Perfect."

We turned and walked on in companionable silence, though I was struggling to put my thoughts together enough that I could speak.

When we reached the lake, we sat near the water, watching the colors of the sunset play against the rippling black water.

"My mother killed herself," I blurted.

"What? Oh, Mary, I'm so sorry!"

"And my father wants me to stay at Hogwarts."

"What about the funeral? There is going to be one?"

I took out the letter from my father and handed it to Cho. She opened it and read, and tears slipped down my face as I replayed the few words in my head. Cho turned to me. She put her arm around me and I laid my head on her shoulder, tears slipping unnoticed to her robes.

"It'll be okay," Cho said softly. "You've got Hogwarts, and you've got me."

I closed my eyes a moment, torn between pain and joy. "You're my best friend, Cho," I said, and sat up, wiping my eyes. I smiled at her and she smiled back.

"And you're mine." Her arm left my shoulders, and I looked out over the lake again.

"What am I going to do next year without you?"

"You'll be too busy studying for your N.E.W.T.s to miss me," she said with a laugh.

I looked at her again. "No, I won't." I had the sudden compulsion to kiss her, but fought it back. I was tired and overemotional.

"You'll be fine. And I'll send you an owl every day." Her eyes sparkled, and she swept a lock of dark hair behind her ear.

"Promise?" I asked.

"Promise." Cho took my hand in hers and gave it a squeeze.

"I love you," I said, then felt suddenly horrified at myself.

Cho looked at me, but didn't release my hand. I leaned forward and pressed my lips to hers, confused, but wanting as much from her as I could get. Her mouth was soft and warm, but not inviting. I pulled away.

She looked at me, shock in her eyes, then pushed to her feet and turned, running back to the castle. I gathered a fistful of robes and cried into my hands again.