Saving your life

He just left her there, in the middle of a Muggle street and so weak she could barely move. She thought about calling someone to help her, but something told her it would be better if no one in the Order knew what had happened; she wasn’t even sure she knew herself. There was only one way to get out of there. She looked around to make sure no one would see her, and Apparated by headquarters’ door.

She took a deep breath, opened the door and, hoping she wouldn’t be found, crept noiselessly up the stairs to her bedroom.

Her mind was a blur, images of the last few hours kept coming back, and she started feeling dizzy.

She slowly walked over to her bathroom and magically filled the tub in just a few seconds. She took off her clothes and threw them by the door.

The hot water surrounded her body, relaxing her aching muscles and washing away the bad memories. Soon the images flowing in her mind were rather different.

She just couldn’t believe what she had just done. Was it true what he had said, that he was saving her life? She had believed it then for some reason, but now, after she was back there, safe, she saw the whole thing through a very different angle.

Was he just playing with her mind, trying to get her so confused they would find a way to use her against the ones she loved?

Through the years they had suspected Snape so many times, and every single one they had been wrong. Was there something about Dumbledore’s death they didn’t know yet? Something they couldn’t understand?

She had seen it in his eyes; he had seemed concerned, and had sounded truthful when saying he was trying to help her. She was still alive, wasn’t she? He had even healed her wounds. That had to mean something, right?

The truth was, she had never seen him that way, as a man rather than just a teacher. Still, her body had reacted to every touch; after the first shock had worn off, she had responded to him without even thinking, and now she could feel her heart beat faster at just the thought of him. It made her feel like a silly girl.

Suddenly she heard a sound that startled her, and she opened her eyes. She must have dozed off with those thoughts on her mind. She looked around, suddenly scared again, trying to find the source of the noise.

It was coming from where she’d left her clothes; it was like a scratch, from a quill on paper. She stepped out of the tub and wrapped herself in a towel. She reached for her robes and noticed they felt warm to the touch. Inside one of the inner pockets, she found a piece of parchment. It went cold the moment she touched it, and words appeared on it, a single line at first: ‘Are you alright?’

She hesitated, not knowing what this was about, but after a few seconds, another line replaced the first one. ‘Are you hurt?’

She reached for a quill of her own and wrote down two words ‘Professor Snape?’ although there was not need to ask, she knew that handwriting well enough.

‘Yes,’ and then ‘Are you hurt?’

‘I don’t think so.’

‘I believe you deserve an explanation, but I can’t give you one, at least not with all the facts. What I can tell you is this…’

The words kept appearing, only one or two lines replaced over and over again, and she had to concentrate hard just to read them before they were gone.

‘I had to tell the Dark Lord you were working for us, so you wouldn’t be killed. They were to think I had seduced you, and you were now spying for me.’

‘He wasn’t inclined to believe this, so I had to convince him I was telling the truth. Had you done anything to stop me earlier tonight, we would both be dead by now.’

The words vanished and a few seconds passed, but she couldn’t write anything.

‘Still, I’m afraid this isn’t over yet. They will expect you to provide information about the Order, and they’ll probably follow me almost everywhere. We will have to meet again, and they will be there. Do you understand this?’

‘Yes,’ she wrote, the quill shaking in her hand.

A small map appeared then on the parchment, and instructions next to it.

‘You are to Apparate there at 8 o’clock, three days from now. You will find a small cabin half a mile south from there. Go inside and wait for me.’

‘This parchment will be destroyed in a few minutes. Make sure you will remember where to go, and don’t be late.’

She stared at the parchment even after memorizing the map, and a few minutes later it turned into blue flames and consumed itself.

How she managed to pretend nothing was wrong in front of her friends, she never knew. Maybe they were just too busy to notice.

During the day, there was always something to do, someone to talk to; but alone at night, images of everything that had happened would suddenly come back full force.

The first night it was the masked men around her, hurting her and laughing, and she woke up drenched in sweat and trembling, too scared to fall back to sleep.
The two nights that followed, however, the memories were quite different. She would feel his touch against her skin, his lips on her neck, his body close to hers, and once awake she felt even more confused than before, but for some reason not afraid.

The third morning, she woke just as the sun was rising and couldn’t go back to sleep, so she went to the kitchen and waited for the others to wake up. When everyone was there and their breakfast on the table, she just stared down at her plate, unable to eat, and was so distracted she started to draw attention to herself.

She spent the day in the library, pretending to read even when she knew she couldn’t concentrate on anything for more than two seconds, but it was the best place to be if one didn’t want to be bothered. So the hours went by, and soon the sky was dark again.

She hadn’t eaten all day, but couldn’t bring herself to it, and after telling everyone she was too tired and just wanted to go to bed, she walked up the stairs, grabbed a cloak, and, after whispering a few spells to make sure no one would notice her absence, she went back downstairs and silently left the place.

It was still too early when she Apparated in the woods, but she couldn’t wait any longer. She found the cabin just where he had said it would be and entered. It was empty but for a table and a broken wooden chair.

She found a fireplace and lit a small fire, more to give herself something to do than because she was cold. She sat on the floor and stared at the flames, keeping her mind empty of thoughts.

A loud pop brought her back to reality, and she stood up, startled. She made to walk to the window, but had only taken a few steps when she felt a strong arm around her waist, pulling her back against his body.

“Don’t speak,” he whispered in her ear as he pulled her closer

She felt his lips on her neck, his hand slowly undoing just a few buttons from her shirt and sliding inside. She closed her eyes and gasped when she felt the contact of his fingers. Were they always that cold? Their touch against her warm skin sent shivers through her body. She felt his other hand slowly moving towards her skirt, playing with the waistband, his mouth nibbling her earlobe.

She opened her eyes and stiffened when she saw a face peering through the window, a glint in those eyes that made her breath catch He must have sensed it, for he stopped moving.

“I told you they’d follow me. Forget about him,” he said resuming his ministrations.

She forced her eyes shut again, and soon her body was responding to his touch, even more than before. She leaned back against him and moaned when she felt his fingers slipping under the skirt, inside her underwear. Everything else was long forgotten.

During these last days, she had almost convinced herself their encounter had never really happened, that she had just imagined it, probably out of shock from being trapped and almost killed by Death Eaters. Now, he was there again, and his touch felt so familiar, so good. It just felt right. For the second time in her life, her brain was no longer in charge, and her body was moving on its own accord.

She felt one hand caressing her breast, just as the other one found her clit and started rubbing. Her hips ground back against his and she heard him moan. Just as one of his fingers moved down and slowly entered her she heard him talking, but she couldn’t pay any attention.

“Miss Granger,” she heard, “Miss Granger,” but in her mind, it sounded just like a buzz. It was her first name leaving his lips that finally got her attention.

“Wh…ahhh…what?” She managed to reply through her dry throat.

“I need you to hear me, you have to concentrate. Can you do that?”

After a few seconds, she just nodded her head in response, lips parted and breathing hard from all the pleasure he was giving her.

“This is important,” he whispered in her ear, yet his fingers never stopped moving. “There’s someone at the Ministry; he’s passing information to the Dark Lord. Important information. I don’t know his name, but I believe he is an Auror. I’ve only seen him once; he has a jagged scar across his face, on the left side. Someone from the Order must stop him, but you can’t let them know how you got this information. This has to remain a secret. Do you understand?”

She buried her hands on his hair and pulled him closer, his lips making contact with her neck again, and the yes she cried out was an answer to his question as much as it was to his touch.

He didn’t make her beg; he knew what she needed and gave it to her. She couldn’t help moaning, her body shuddering with every touch, her hips grinding uncontrollably.

The hand on her breast suddenly stopped caressing, the whole arm wrapping itself around her waist just as her knees buckled, keeping her from falling. She felt her muscles tense, trapping his fingers inside of her as she screamed in pleasure.

After a moment, she felt she had recovered some strength, her breathing going back to normal, and, still feeling his erection against her thigh, her hand left his hair and snaked around, touching him, trying to return some of the pleasure he had just given her. The moment he felt it he gasped and pulled back.

She turned around and saw a look of confusion on his face. He just whispered “I have to go, and you should leave too,” but neither moved. A few seconds passed in silence and then he took a step forwards, placing a soft kiss on her neck as he said “Make sure Potter doesn’t leave London for the next few weeks,” and with that he vanished.

She stood still, trying to make sense of what had just happened, when she heard something move outside the cabin. She glanced back towards the window and saw those eyes again, with the spark in them that made her uneasy.

Their eyes locked a few seconds, and then fear took over and she Apparated by headquarters once more, running inside where she would feel safe.

All the lights were out already, everyone in bed, and she made her way up to her room, careful not to make any noise that would wake them up.

She lay on her bed, her clothes still on, and a smile across her lips that even fear couldn’t erase. She didn’t understand why she was smiling, but she just couldn’t help herself.