When Autumn Leaves

He awoke first to the sound of glass shattering. Then, he felt the pain as he shifted in bed. His muscles hurt. He felt bruises formed namely where he’d been hit. Stomaching a wave of nausea, Harry sat up; he could hear Vernon rambling down stairs. Nothing else came though; he'd obviously been forgotten for the moment.

After finding himself to be in no immediate danger, he chose to pensively sit and stare out the window. His body ached. He tried to remember what had happened the night before; or rather what he assumed had been the night before. He remembered the blows and the pain. That was normal. Then he remembered there had been Vernon’s mad rambling. Harry sighed and shook his head, he didn't know how much longer he could take this treatment. It was affecting him far too much now.

Tears met the windowpane. Harry gently touched the wet spots that were rapidly forming. He cried for the first time in many days. He cried for himself, the ones he loved who had suffered, but namely he cried for the boy that was forced to grow up too fast. He cried for Harry Potter.

The war was over yet here Harry was, a forgotten savior suffering at the hands of people he should trust. Loneliness set in followed by despair. Despair was a terrible feeling, but it was in despair that Harry kept his strength. In that moment he began to accept this. It was his punishment. The thought slivered through his mind. In a matter of seconds the thought was no longer a thought, but a belief. This was punishment for the lives he'd lost during the war.

His musing was interrupted by the loud crash of his door being slammed open. The stench of alcohol filled Harry’s nostrils. His uncle looked furious. He was purple faced, simply an enraged drunk. Panic coiled in Harry's gut.

“Boy! Come here!” Vernon bellowed.


Harry's heart lurched. His uncle impatiently dragged him to his feet; their faces were inches away. Harry couldn't help the feeing of disbelief, surely Vernon wasn't going to beat him again!

However, the first blow was a punch and it told him how wrong he was to think the abuse would let up. The punch sent him reeling to his knees. His uncle was rambling again. He tried to pick up the mantra Vernon seemed stuck on, but couldn't. Another blow landed disrupting anything but whimpers of pain. A kick to his ribs made him quite aware he was in serious trouble. And that nasty thought filter through his mind again. Perhaps he deserved this. Why else would it happen?

A harsh tug to Harry's hair had him groping at his Uncles hand, fiercely trying to free himself; he slowly rose to his feet only to be smacked down by an open hand. His face stung.

"Stop...please!" His malnourished body quivered under the consistent abuse. He was at his breaking point.

"Ungrateful, no good freak. You hurt Dudley. You ruined my life. You ruined my marriage! YOU, IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT!"

The words cut through Harry with mind numbing force.

It clicked. Petunia left Vernon. A spark of malicious satisfaction appeared. Vernon finally was able to hurt like Harry had. For all the times he had suffered under his uncles abuse. His justice was quickly shot down as memories began to swirl about his mind. The nasty thought seemed to be a broken record in his mind.

He ruined everything. He deserved this.

Another punch to Harry’s gut had him coughing, the dormant pain suddenly grew a tenfold and held him whimpering. A punch landed square on his jaw, and blood dribbled from his mouth. His world tilted, and he was gasping on the floor, a kick had winded him. Blackness crossed his vision.

The blows ceased. Harry realized what a pitiful site he must have been. He lay half curled on the floor in a desperate attempt to protect himself. He was wheezing, whimpering, and coughing. Tears leaked down his face. The boy who lived felt shame boil in him...he couldn't even protect himself against muggles. Helpless Potter, Pathetic Harry, he managed to exterminate the greatest evil in Wizarding history, yet he couldn't even defend himself against simple muggles.

The quiet caused Harry to look up cautiously. Vernon was staring at him intently and it made his insides squirm.

"You...boy..need...to be shown your place...you need to repent for your sins..." The slurred, and breathy words met Harry with a sinking feeling to his chest. He attempted to get up, get to his knees to run, but the pain was too great. His body was too weak. Vernon dragged Harry to him. Harry clenched his eyes closed. He couldn't see it, it wasn't happening. No beatings, no angry words, no Vernon...it wasn't there. His denial was ended as quickly as it started by the sound of clothes rustling.

Harry snapped his eyes open and immediately wished he hadn't.