Scars III

Chapter 3: Blaise’s Words

Harry pulled the door shut behind him.

“Blaise?”

There was no answer. Harry sighed and moved through the dark room. He could hear Blaise’s breathing quicken as his steps resounded on the stone floor. Harry was typically as silent as death, even in his steel toed dragon hide boots, however he did not want to startle Blaise by suddenly being in front of him without warning.

“Blaise,” Harry called again. Two days had passed since Harry had returned to Hogwarts yet it was he who was approaching Blaise now. If he had thought anyone would be happy to see him it would be Blaise, apparently he was wrong.

“I’m sorry,” the apology was hardly even spoken; Harry had to strain his vampire hearing just to make it out. A small thump signaled Blaise’s inability to stand and Harry felt his heart sink as he realized what that sickly sweet smell was.

“You’re drunk,” Harry accused. He was no more than a foot away from Blaise’s cowering form yet the other boy did not appear to have heard him. “How long have you been drinking Blaise?”

“I…I never…I was supposed to keep them safe…I’m sorry, so sorry…” Blaise babbled and Harry had a sudden sensation as though drowning.

“You,” Blaise said, his voice slightly slurred, “you failed…I failed…and it just got worse…”

“I know Blaise,” Harry said and knelt next to his friend. Blaise flinched away from him and Harry felt himself cringe at the reaction. “I never meant for any of this…”

“But,” Blaise said and Harry could feel the other boy’s eyes on his, “you did it. You raped us, of everything. We lived for you Harry Potter. We lived for you yet you left us, raping us of everything we held dear, every illusion of safety we held. We tried to keep a hold but you slipped beyond our grasp and we were alone….I am alone. I tired so hard to save them from themselves but it wasn’t enough. I wasn’t strong enough…”

Harry shivered convulsively. That all sounded far to lucid for a boy as drunk as Blaise was.

“Harry…no, Dev,” Blaise said suddenly. He stood as suddenly as he had spoken and Harry was left to stare up at where he could hear Blaise’s breath coming in short little gasps. “I may have failed to keep us together, to keep us safe, to keep us sane, but you…you didn’t even try. I am not drunk Potter, I am hangover, and no matter how bad things get, I could never do what you did. I could never run away like you did. Go away Potter. Go back to your paradise and leave us to rot where you dropped us.”

Harry sat up with a gasp. Shaking his head he tried to forget the fury the Blaise in his dream had screamed at him with. It had been so real.

Harry stood. He needed a smoke. Or maybe some fresh air. Or maybe he just needed to…no, he couldn’t run away again, he had to fix this!

~~~~~~

Viktor listened to the boy he considered a brother wake and leave the room. He knew Harry was near breaking under the stress of finding his family like they were. But Viktor also knew there would be no other way for Harry to handle it than by himself.

The young vampire believed it was all his fault. He would not take kindly a person attempting to clean up his mess. Not if he hadn’t asked for the help himself.

Viktor yawned and rolled over. He would wait for Harry to come to him, when that happened he would do all he could to help his little brother.

~~~~~~

Blaise was startled awake by a hand landing on his shoulder. He stared up and found emerald green eyes watching him. Blaise shuddered and bit his lip.

“I need to speak with you,” Harry whispered. Blaise nodded.

Silencing spells went up while Blaise blinked hard. The sleep working it’s way from between his eyelashes.

“Tell me what has happened,” Harry demanded.

Blaise yawned and nodded, trying to focus his thoughts. “Since you left?” he asked though he already knew the answer.

“Yes.”

Blaise straightened up and turned towards the boy that had left them in shatters. “Alright. Since you left Helen has killed herself. Draco has taken to smoking outside and ignoring all things that might actually help him. Hermione lives in her books and refuses to even noticed that there are people around her. Ginny is fucking anything with a cock and no doubt smoking something that’s not legal. I’m pretty sure she’s tried marijuana and possibly agrafine.”

“What about you?” Harry asked. Blaise could hear no emotion in the vampire’s voice.

“Me?” Blaise said and thought for a moment. “I’ve managed to be drunk half the time, hung over the other half. I guess we’re all pretty fucked up…since you left.”

“Yeah,” Harry agreed and this time Blaise could hear weariness in the boy’s voice. “What…do you think I can fix this?” Harry asked.

Blaise bit his lip. “It’s a little late Potter,” he said and whished he hadn’t.

“I know that,” Harry said, surprising Blaise with the lack of anger in his voice. “But I have to try. When I left it was to keep you all safe. If I hadn’t gone…I’m pretty sure I would have killed you all…”

“Yeah well, we managed to just about do it for you,” Blaise said his lips twisting into a mockery of a grin.

“What can I do?” Harry asked suddenly and Blaise felt Harry’s hands on his own.

Glancing down at he darkness where his and Harry’s fingers were intertwined Blaise mumbled, “I’m not sure. I think…maybe…Ginny? She needs…I think, this is going to sound awful…but I think she needs you to love her, not just love her but LOVE her,” Blaise said, shuddering at the very thought.

It came as no surprise when Harry wrenched his fingers from Blaise’s. “What are you talking about? She’s like a little sister! How do you expect me to fuck my own little sister!?” Harry yelled at him and Blaise was eternally grateful for the silencing charm.

“I’ve talked to her,” Blaise said slowly, his eyes still focused on the spot where his hands were curled in his lap. “She doesn’t understand what…what sex really is.” He glanced up at where he knew Harry’s eyes would be. “Talk to her, first, see if you can find a better answer than I could.”

“What about the others?” Harry asked, his voice wavering between cold and desperate.

“Hermione…gods but I miss her,” Blaise muttered and shook his head. “Hermione needs to remember the world is here. It think she’s trying to punish herself. She thinks she’s the one that caused everything.”

Harry nodded, “and Draco? And Snape? What about them?”

“Draco…he needs time. He loved you Harry, you need to love him back. I doubt there will be any other way to fix what you did.”

“He’s my mate, Blaise,” Harry whispered.

“Then you know what you did,” Blaise told him, his voice hardening on the words.

“Yes….but…he’s…I mean, I don’t. A mate is a weakness!”

“Only if you don’t love them,” Blaise said. He fumbled in the darkness for a moment before he found Harry’s cool fingers. Grasping them tightly he asked, “do you love him?”

“I…maybe…yes,” Harry whispered.

“Then…it will work out,” Blaise said, hoping it was true. “As for Snape, all you need do is speak to him. He, at least, never stopped loving you…though he’d never admit he actually cares about you,” Blaise said with a wry grin.

He heard Harry chuckles as well. And then he was being crushed in a cool embrace that made his insides squirm. It had been to long away from the vampire.

“I have missed you,” Harry whispered in his ear and then he was gone. Blaise stared about the darkness before shaking his head and laying back on the bed.

“Either I just dreamed that or things might actually get better,” Blaise told the pillow.

After a moment he sat up with a start. “I completely forgot to tell him about…” Blaise bit his lip hard enough to make him yelp. Shaking his head in the exact manner he had a moment before he lay down once more. “He’ll find out soon enough…I guess…”

~~~~~~~

Harry woke the next morning just as the sun was peeking it’s nose over the horizon. Yawning he leapt from bed and bounded out of the ship. He arrived at the doors to Hogwarts in less than a minute and paused to gather his thoughts. It was time to start righting things.

“Ginny first,” he whispered and opened the door.
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A/N: Review for more