A Very Sirius Christmas Carol

Chapter 3

As suddenly as they arrived in the previous vision, they were pulled into another. They were in the midst of the city streets, people bustling around them, obviously doing their last minute Christmas shopping. The streets were alight, bells tinkled above shop doors and Sirius knew this street well. The grim specter at his side eyed the scene with his hollow eyes.

“Do you know this place?” He asked in his unearthly voice.

“Know it? I lived here for a time. I learned all there was to know about how to fight the Dark Arts here. Alongside you. How could I forget this place?” Sirius said as they stopped in front of a nondescript squat building.

They entered the door and in front of them, seated at a small desk was a large man. He had protruding teeth, and his face was red and flustered. A woman seated next to him continued her work, noting a parchment in front of her. The parchment rolled over the edge of the table right onto the floor, but the witch didn’t mind it, she continued her furious scribbling.

“It’s Frank Longbottom! Alive! And Alice next to him!” Sirius cried, remembering his old friends fondly.

Frank laid down his pen and looked at the clock that hung above the door. He rubbed his eyes wearily and nudged his wife next to him.

“Sirius! James! It’s time!” He yelled, his timid voice happy and loud in the small building.

A younger Sirius and James appeared in the room and Sirius gasped at his former self and friend.

“James. It’s you, mate. Alive, poor you.” Sirius had rarely thought back to these days, and seeing them in front of his was a shock to behold.

“It’s Christmas Eve guys! No more work for tonight, let’s head over to the Three Broomsticks and then be on our way home for the night.” Frank grabbed for his cloak and Alice finally looked up from her parchment.

In an instant, all four had gone to work, closing the doors, charming the windows. All of this was to guard the work that they had yet accomplished, charms that kept their work safe from prying eyes. After all had been done, they gathered back in the cramped foyer of the building and were ready to depart.

They closed the door behind them and made their way to the small tavern that had been enlarged for the occasion, all tables and chairs moved to the side, and people had already started to arrive and helped with the festivities. Rosemerta placed pints of butterbeer on the counter faster than people could grab them. She stocked firewhiskey for the bolder people who sought to rid their chills quicker, and tea and mead for the older crowd. This was a mixed gathering, all who had worked together for so long, they had all come together this night for a celebration. Lilly was there, stunning in a red dress. Remus, alone for the night, wooed the women with his quiet charm. There was Arthur and Molly, accompanied by their two small children, and Peter sat quiet in the corner, nursing a firewhiskey. The music began and everyone started to whirl around the makeshift dancefloor, everyone finding a partner in the sea of faces. There was Albus dancing slowly with Minerva, laughing at something James had shouted to him. He saw his former self walk over to a shy looking brown-haired woman and bow to her as he asked her for a dance. He remembered her deep brown eyes, and how he had stared at them all night, transfixed by her subtle beauty.

The dancing continued, and the room started to heat up. Flustered and laughing people lined at the bar for more drinks, but were forced to wait as Rosemerta had taken a dance with Remus Lupin. A short waltz and then she was back at her post. Slightly before eleven, she rang a bell and announced last call, and when the time came, she waved her wand and the bar was cleaned. She milled about the crowd, conjuring cloaks, wishing everyone a happy holiday, and shuffling people out the door.

While Sirius had watched all of this, he was flooded with the memories that the time brought to him. He gazed at his earlier self, dancing with the woman he remembered so fondly, how could he have ever forgotten those soulful eyes for even a moment of his life? He was like a madman and he wondered what had ever become of the woman that had stole his heart that night.

Sirius was so caught up in his own thoughts about her, that he had forgotten the ghost of his friend beside him. He watched as the former self and James retired to their apartment that they shared above the Three Broomsticks and turned to the specter.

“A small matter,” He stated, “And yet so large to steal a man’s very heart.”

“Small.” Sirius agreed.

The spirit motioned for Sirius to listen to the conversation that they had that night as they readied themselves for bed.

“I love her Sirius.” James said as he pulled his sleeping clothes on.

“I think I know what you mean now.” Sirius thought of those eyes as he spoke that night. James was too involved in his own speech, and obviously didn’t hear what Sirius had said.

“I think I’m going to ask her. To marry me, I mean. We’re not in school anymore, and everything is going so well, we’ve been making advances against You-Know-Who, I think now is the time for us to tie the knot.” James looked at Sirius who had seated himself at the edge of his bed. Those eyes. “Are you listening, man?” James asked.

“I am. That’s nice.” Sirius replied half-heartedly.

James leveled with the younger Sirius then, and had peered into his eyes. “Don’t you see! She’s my all! Love. That’s what it’s all about, mate! It has the power to render us happy or unhappy; to make our service light or burdensome; a pleasure or toil. Say that this power lies in words and looks; in things so slight and insignificant that it is impossible to add and count them up: what then? The happiness it gives, is quite as great as if it cost a fortune!”

“James, you’re babbling again, what are you trying to say?” Sirius remembered his nonchalant attitude, but knew that James’s words had indeed struck a chord within him.

“I’m in love. That’s not even the right way to say it. I know what love is. I’ll never fall out of it! I know this! I’m going to ask her, I swear.” James finished, plopping himself into his bed.

Sirius felt the specter look at him.

“What is it, Sirius?” He asked.

“Nothing.” Sirius damned himself as he realized he was crying. But the tears kept coming.

“Not nothing, if you break like this, what is it?” The specter kept his gaze steady.

“I just wish I could see you that happy again.” Sirius expected a reproach or mocking laugh, but felt despair even more as the specter seemed to close its eyes again.

“My time is limited, and there is yet more to see.” The specter finally responded. With his words, the scene again changed and a slightly older Sirius was before them. Seated before him in the still grass of a small park was a woman.

A woman with the same intense chocolate brown eyes that had so seduced him years before. She was draped in black mourning clothes that outshone even the specter’s previous clothes. Sirius’s face was drawn and angry in comparison to her smooth and unwavering glance.

“It matters little. To you very little. Another man has been taken in, and the wheels of the Ministry turn regardless. They will stop at nothing whether it is right or wrong.” She sighed a melancholy sound, escaping her.

“What man has been taken?” He asked.

“My golden one.” She looked at him with a heavy heart.

“That’s how the world works, love. These things happen, and life goes on.” He tried to reassure her. He remembered the feelings that he had, bitter waiting, years of work, for nothing. He remembered thinking that it was about time the Ministry had stepped in and decided to take their side in the stand against the Dark Lord. “We must pursue this thing no matter what.”

“You fear the world too much, Sirius Black. You have to let go and live, before the time that they take you away approaches. I can feel it. It’s coming.” She paused, “And then they will take you from my arms as we wait for them to come. This is the future that we have to fear. I See it.” She stopped and waited as though someone that none of them could see was talking into her tiny perfect ear.

“I’m still the same to you. Despite all these things that I have done, I’ve never changed to you.”

She stared at him.

“Have I?” He faltered suddenly. Realization hit Sirius as he stood side by side with the specter. He had changed. When he had wondered what had happened with the brown-eyed-girl from that dance so long ago, this is what had happened. She had been here all along. He had changed, there was no doubt about that.

He had said the same words to her, the same that he had said to her from the first night at that dance, but his will had changed. He told himself that he had loved her with all his heart, but he had changed on the inside. His feeling for her could not compare to the feelings if revenge he felt that he had to have against the Dark Lord. There was nothing that he could do to quell the wave of remorse that came crashing over him as he contemplated what he had done to the woman in front of him.

“The memory of what you have become will stay with you, and I hope you remember it well as they pull you away.” She said as they parted. There was nothing more to be said between the two of them. He watched her depart with a tinge of guilt and even more despair.

Sirius turned to the ghost. “No more, I can see no more. Take me home, I can suffer no more of this madness.”

“There is one more sight that I will have you see, brother.” The specter replied in a quiet voice.