Forbidden Love

Forbidden Love.
Roleplayed By: Abusedlight and Padfoot.
Posted by: DarkEmbrace
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Summary: What happens when a girl melts the ice of a Professor? One everyone thought was untouchable? And what happens when They fall in love.... and end up on different sides of the War? Will they still stay together? Set during and after the 6th book... If you don\'t want to know what happens in the 6th book, don\'t read this!
Rated: N-17 for Lemons.
Note: We started rping this before the book came out, so Snape got the DADA spot but he stayed in Potions.
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Sitting at his desk in the large room his eyes traced over the words as he wrote them, the sound of the quill in his hand the only sound aside from a lightly simmering from a potion a few yards away. He hadn\'t really noticed that the room would need candles soon as the small windows were starting to stop in there weak effort to brighten up the quickly dimming room. Dipping his quill into the ink once more he finished writing on the page before quickly flipping it to the next and continuing on with his work.

Hizashi, whom hadn\'t gotten much sleep knocked on the door then entered it... It was just this morning she had realized she had forgotten her things ... plus she needed to check up on the two animals. Though it hadn\'t been until now that she could come do anything about it. She had taken a shower not long before, which would be why her hair fell wet about her back... The shirt she was wearing was just a large button-up mans shirt that had dragons on it in the color of silver. the back ground was a dark green. Silver eyes blinked as she entered the room. Her legs encased in black leather ... oddly enough. and her small feet had been slipped into black flip-flops.

Looking up for a moment from his work he gave her a nod, looking back down to the book he was working on and waiting a moment to speak, his voice still a little scratchy from the drinks he had last night. He kept his voice low for that reason as well as to not upset the headache he was trying to get rid of at the moment. \"You seem to have left your things here last night.\"
Glancing over her appearance he remembered that he really should stop in his work soon and take a shower as well as change his clothes, having not really slept at all yet ether. Looking to see if he still had any tea left he suppressed a light sigh when he found the cup empty.

She blinked at him, and nodded, her voice soft. \"So it seems.\" She checked idly on the animals, seeing they were still alive, she grabbed her books, and notes and gathered them, before going to where her bag was sitting, and stuffing them into it. She then moved, looking at the potion ... there were six bottles of it. She idly wondered if she should leave them here, or take them to her room.

Scanning over the notes he was making for a moment he glanced back up watching her for a little while, his mind racing over many different thoughts at the moment in the way only one\'s mind could when it was lacking sleep as well as other things as he was. Forcing himself to look back down at his work as he tried to remember exactly what it was he was going to put next.
Closing his eyes for a moment to remember he drew a blank, getting slightly annoyed as he closed the book sliding it away from himself and setting down the quill. Leaning his elbows into the desk he laced his fingers together as he glanced back over to what she was doing.

She blinked and shook her head, hard suddenly. Before grabbing a quill and started to label the potions, her eyes blinking every now and then. Her hair clinging to the curve on her cheeks, and into her eyes, something she was annoyed about, and kept either tucking it behind an ear or pushing it back, though another lock would always fall into her face ... she fixed the labels, and then placed five with the other labeled potions she had been working on and then sixth? It was placed in her bag, thinking that since she knew it worked she thought it maybe useful one day ... after all, with the things she did, who knows, right?

Watching as she placed the bottles into her bag he finally talked again. \"You should make sure to take care in not letting another get a hold on one of those. Its not exactly something anyone should be having around with them.\" He knew she was smart enough to know who he was referring to on that, having been asked himself to try and make potions that did such a thing that hers had done by the deatheaters. Finally forcing his eyes back down from her he looked over the desk, thinking it might be a good time to think about getting cleaned up, thinking he probably didn\'t look to good at the moment, as well as the smell of alcohol sure to be hanging around him a little.

She nodded to him. \"I know... It\'s not like they will be able to get to it anyway... It\'s not going to the dorms.\" It wasn\'t ... she would not be going to the dorms either... She was going to her study... the one that she made The Headmaster give her. She closed her bag, and then yawned, stretching in a catlike way that made her tense up then relax... Her mind blissfully blank until an image of Snape from last night. She blinked a few times. and sighed... Why was it today her mind was in the gutter?

He gave a nod at her words and shifted his gaze down to the table, expecting that she would be leaving soon so he could go to his private room behind him and take a nap and change. Forcing down yawn that suddenly came up at the thought of taking a nap he tried to cover it up by coughing slightly, blinking a few times and trying to not to show to much emotion in front of her. His mind however was on the soft bed only two rooms over, and the warm bath just before that.

She spoke, after seeing him try to cover the Yawn up with a cough. \"Why do you cover your emotions up?\" She seemed to ask this out of the blue, really, she could tell in her own way that he was tired, add in the fact he was, more and likely thinking about going to sleep, she knew most people will ask things truthfully and willingly, if only to get the other person to go away so they could go to sleep. She was a Snake after all... But Hizashi didn\'t go about as everyone else did... She found that being open made it easier to find people\'s weakness or their fears, or whatever they wanted to hide ... but Hizashi never blackmailed people, unless she had to... After all, by now she could blackmail over half the school with a few words. Just to get them to do what she wanted... Even the Headmaster, which was something in itself.

Looking up at her question he tried to look as indifferent as he could about it, sitting up in his chair and trying to look as though he was in no way tired. He tried to think of a witty or smart remark back for her question but failed, not knowing that her way of thinking was very correct he decided to give in for once, thinking it best to give a short and half true answer then to draw it out. \"Because its easier then dealing with them, as I am sure you will find when you get older.\" Thinking it was good enough for now he looked back down to the desk, eyes scanning over the different stacks of papers and books he had sitting out. His mind drifted over her question however thinking of some of the more direct answers he could have given to it.

She raised an eyebrow and then moved closer to him, blinking. \"Why would it be easier? I mean... I always thought it would be easier to let them show...\" She thought about that... Then way did she hide her Depression? That was easy... She was ashamed of it. She watched him, awaiting the answer, calmly.

Slowly starting to become annoyed, not by her questioning really but more by the real answers to them. Looking back up he found that it was that annoyance that was starting to force him to let more of the truth slip out in his words, wanting to retreat into his rooms more and more now. \"When one has a reputation to keep, or simply no one else to share ones emotions with it is simply an easier path to hide them then drown in them.\" He knew the moment the answer left him it was far more then he really wished to have said, as well as a little more harsh then he would have wanted towards someone who was, compared to all others generally nice to him.

She blinked startled at his answer and the harshness he placed in to his words. She winced, and then nodded. Turning silently she padded to her things, and gathered them. wondering idly if she should press more, but not wanting him to be mad at her... She turned and gave a small bow... Something she only did to her family, mainly \'cause they would beat her if she didn\'t. A movement of her arm swing the bag onto her shoulder, flashing the scared arm under the sleeve. She seemed to have forgotten her spells that hide them today, and smiled, ready to go. \"I guess I better go, Sorry for upsetting you. Night.\"

Seeing her reaction to his words he suddenly felt upset at himself, another emotion that he was unable to block at the moment. Closing his eyes for a moment he let his hands drop to the desk as he gave a light sigh, not covering it up this time. \"Please wait.\" He paused looking back over to her. \"I didn\'t mean that the way it sounded.\" Pausing again he tried to think about how to continue never really having apologized very much before. \"I\'ve had a very long night but its hardly a good excuse for what I said, and how. Your not the person I‘m upset at.\" Not really knowing exactly how to end that he stopped from saying anymore at that point.

She paused... Looking at him, she nibbled on her lower lip, a small habit that she had picked up when she was younger... Then her tongue darted out over her lips, wetting them, before she spoke. \"I understand... \" She really didn\'t know if she should still leave or if he really wanted her to stay. Her mind was confusing at times. \"You know...\" She spoke this softly. \"I know I am a student here, but I am a good listener ... plus I have a good understanding of things...\" She didn\'t want to finish it... She knew since she started the comment she should finish it.

He gave a small nod at her words, before looking down, he was trying to think about what exactly he really wanted at the moment, not wanting her to leave really, but on the other hand not ever wanting to have anyone around very much ether. Letting out another heavy breath he seemed to be watching the edge of his desk for a few moments before he said anything more back to her. \"That\'s a very generous offer.\" Glancing up he watched her for a few seconds. \"I however am not very good at talking so I donut think it would go very far. If you wish to try and work out any more of my odd emotional problems however you do know where I will be.\"

She blushed lightly, and nodded at his words... \"Very well.\" She looked at him, and then just gave up with trying to keep from tell him. \"I hope you won\'t be mad at me.... But I kind of followed you last night.\" She plopped down on the floor with a sigh. \"I know I shouldn\'t have ... and I am sorry... I just... Couldn\'t help myself...\" She was looking at the floor... Knowing it was best not to look up. If he reacted like Her grandmother, then it was best not to see the pain coming.

He blinked and looked to her, obviously not expecting her to say that or for her to sit down. Thinking about it however he looked away from her eyes tracing over the desk once more as he wondered exactly how long she followed him for, and how long she stayed after. \"You really shouldn\'t have gone in there, most of the people who frequent that aren\'t very noble in their ways.\" He knew it sounded like a poor attempt at pushing the subject in a different direction so he stopped from saying more on that. \"So was there much that you learned from it then?\"

She nodded. \"I see that, since I saw Someone my Grandmother hired to...\" She shut up and then spoke up again, changing it to answer his question. \"Only that you seem to only relax when you are getting drunk... Plus...\" She shut up again and then shrugged. \"Through.... I wonder how many times you go there...\" She shrugged and then smiled. \"I understand why you would get drunk-Its a way to calm down...Plus my mom keeps sending me Sake and this Blueberry Brandy stuff I like to get me to start drinking more and not to cut myself as often...\" WHOA! She snapped her mouth shut and then closed her eyes... Counting to ten... So many near slip ups and then one big one... She really was getting tired... Plus bored with need to talk about things... But that was something she wished she didn\'t have.

He was starting to wonder about his own questions for her now, finding himself quite curious as to who the man she saw there was. Her observations about his getting drunk were mostly right he mused lightly but was cut off as she said her last words, concern flickering over his face. \"Why have you been hurting yourself?\" The words slipped out before he could really think about them, and wasn\'t sure if he really could have thought about everything as clearly as he wished to. \"What would she have needed with hiring someone who goes there?\" He wasn\'t sure about it but had a feeling the two and other things might have been linked.

She epped and then flushed a pale white before wanted to go bang her head on the wall somewhere. \"Well,... You see...\" She rubbed at her arm, where the scars were, felling the newer ones which were made only last night after she got back from spying on the Professor. \"The guy She hired was to....\" She gulped. \"cause as much pain as he could to....\" She didn\'t say the rest ... not about to ... and not touching the subject of her hurting herself. She couldn\'t being herself to tell him about the cutting... Nor to tell him that the man was to hurt her... She remember it very clearly... It was lucky the headmaster came in when he did... She would have died that day ... she had been so close to breaking-something her grandmother would have loved to see.

He frowned at her words, giving up on concealing what he was thinking or feeling at the moment. He had always hated his family, but more of because they hadn\'t noticed him, hearing her say what she said and knowing that it was her grandmother who hired the man to hurt her it made him slightly sick as well as upset. Looking back to her he tried to give her an understanding look on the matter. \"Seems the Dark Lord has the right idea but the wrong people.\" The words were said quietly but above a whisper, closing his eyes for a moment as he leaned back into the chair, knowing he really should think about things more at the moment before he said them.

Hizashi blinked, and looked up at him, she shrugged, before tilting her head. \"Really... It\'s always like that in the Hakai Family...\" She spoke this softly before shrugging... Glad that he didn\'t ask what actually had happened ... she didn\'t know if she could keep the depression from showing him very thing if that was the case... Though she wondered idly if he would ask her. She pushed the thought away. \"He may... But I don\'t think I could will myself to follow the ... thing.\" She made a face and then, shrugged... \"I don\'t really follow Headmaster either though... So I guess you can say I am just on the Light\'s side of the war because that\'s the way I think.\"

He was able to stop himself this time from saying what he wanted, keeping the ‘it should have to be that way in any family’ to himself as he watched her shrug. Looking away at her talk of ‘the thing’ as she called it he was un able to stop his comment this time. \"That thing is a lot easier to follow at first then one might think.\" Quickly changing the subject now however he continued on to her last words. \"Its better anyway to be on a side and not with a person. People can manipulate, an idea is something you get to control.\"

She blinked and then smiled, nodded. \"Like the Headmaster...\" She pulled her kness to her chest, and layed her chin on top of her kness... Her arms wrapped around her legs... The scars from last night appeared an angry redish color against the pale pinks and then white lines that covered the inside of her arms. Silver eyes closing for a minute, before they opened. \"I can\'t stand being told what to do in the first place... I only live with it at home because I have too- I am the youngest alive. Here Have to because I am just a Student.\" She sighed.. Really if her sister had live through her beatings, Hizashi would have been the middle child, but she was have still be beaten more then her little sister, mainly because Hizashi protected her little sister, Her brother, and her mother... The rest she could care less about.

He looked over her, eyes tracing the scars that he could see at the moment. He made sure to listen to her words as he got to his feet now, making his way to one of the cabinets on the far walls. Opening it up he pulled out a small vile, making his way over to where she was sitting. Carefully kneeling down in front of her he looked to her arm first and then to her face the silent question of if he could see it for a moment hanging between them with the look he gave her, the healing potion in his one hand, the other hand resting on the ground. //

She blinked when she saw him moved... Blinking as he wound grab the potion and then kneel infront of her.. Her eyes widening slightly before she moved... Letting her legs fall to the ground in front of her before the were tucked under her bottom.. before she moved her arms out to him... Holding them with the scars up. \"They are fine you know... I havn\'t yet gotten a infection from them...\" She spoke this softly... slightly unsure about letting him do this... Seeing as no one else had tryed to help her before-

Listening to her words but ignoring them slightly as well he reached forward with his free hand, gently taking her arm, his long and practiced fingers avoiding any of the cuts. Looking over the one arm he uncorked the bottle in his other hand, bringing it up and slowly letting the blue gas like liquid drip onto her cuts. It seemed to dissolve the moment it hit her skin, the cuts starting to fade and lots of the newer scars becoming less prominent on her skin. Waiting for a moment he slowly released her arm before moving to the other doing the same and waiting for a moment until both were healed. Putting the cork back on the bottle he looked back up to her. \"It will feel a bit cold to the touch for a while but it will fade soon.\" //

She blinked at this, and then nodding to him, her voice whispering passed her pale lips. \"Thank you.\" She bite her lower lip, and looking at her healed arms... Not really sure what to think about it for the time being. Her eyes then dropping to the floor.. She really felt ashamed for slipping and letting him know that she cut herself... She was told that it was something to be ashame off... the fact she was depressed... Of course she had been told other things to be ashamed off... One of the was to let people help her...-

\"I have more if you want this.\" He held out the bottle to her now not sure if it was exactly the right thing for a teacher to be letting a student have, but his mind really wasn’t in any of the right places right now. Moving a bit away he felt slightly odd with sitting on the floor, though didn’t get up quite yet, his legs tired from walking and some how the floor feeling better then it really should have at the moment. \"I could really use something strong right now.\" He neglected to even try and his the words when he said them, not really caring at this point. And not sure if she even did ether. //

She blinked at the professor and then looked at her bag before dipping her hand into it, she pulled out a bottle of blue colored liquid... She placed her on the floor between her and him.. And with a smooth movement she took the healing potion, which was placed into her bag, before she tilted her head at the bottle she pulled out, before picking it up and opening it.. She took a sniff, and then nodded seeming to herself before she held the bottle out to him after his comment of needing something strong. Students weren\'t allowed to have Brandy, but not many people knew it was brandy, seeing how it looked and tasted like blueberries.-

Looking at the bottle she pulled out he raised a brow, wondering slightly just what it was that she was able to sneak in with out anyone finding out. Taking it from her he sniffed at it first and gave her a slightly calculating look before bringing it to his lips and taking a drink from it. Blinking at the taste he waited to drink anymore trying to figure out exactly what it was really. He could tell there was alcohol in it but couldn’t pick out exactly what, the blueberries covering it up quite good. \"That’s different.\" He said after a short while, looking at it. //

Hizashi smiled gently. \"It\'s brandy.\" She spoke this gently, and then smiled, idly... \"It\'s my favorite drink... Mainly \'cause you can\'t taste anything really but the blueberries...\" She shurgged and then looked away. \"I have ten more bottles in my study, so you can have that one.\" She didn\'t look at him... Her poor sleep-needed mind was back in the gutter, and the poor girl didn\'t need it there when she was speaking to the Professor... One she actually liked.-