Totaly addicted to Snape
folder
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Snape/Hermione
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
4
Views:
5,576
Reviews:
26
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Snape/Hermione
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
4
Views:
5,576
Reviews:
26
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Chapter 3: Chase me; chase me I’m a daffodil.
A/N: OK I own nothing, it all belong the wonderful, wonderful, talented J. K Rowling! I’m new at all this so be gentle.
I haven’t got a beta yet and after your kind reviews for the last chapters I thought I would keep going until the time you decide you hate me lol. Oh yes and any flames will be reported to my team of rabid ferrets. I’m thinking of breeding them with rabid badgers....any idea on how we can get them to fly?
Oh and another sorry for the long wait. Full explanation at the bottom. Hope you still like me. Lol
Chapter 3: Chase me; chase me I’m a daffodil.
Snape sat in his dark classroom trying hard to focus on his lesson plan. He was seriously contemplating opening another bottle of Ogden’s by the time his first class arrived. He could here Malfoy’s sickening drawl and Parkinson’s high pitched laughter coming from the corridor. ‘Kill’ A little voice in his head said suggestively. “I bloody well wish.” He muttered to himself as he read the same line again that he had been reading for the last 10 minutes. It was a quick look at the clock and Weasely’s raised voice that finally made him get up and open the door, muttering obscenities under his breath that would make a sailor blush.
He swung open the door with his usual vigour regretting it immediately when the loud bang as it hit the wall echoed in his head making it even more sore if that was at all possible.
“Will you kindly keep your voices down!” He growled through gritted teeth.
Malfoy hand his wand drawn as did Crabbe and Goyle and they where pointed determinedly at the dream team who as usual stood opposite wands drawn also...It didn’t take a genius to work out what was going on here...
“Put your wands away!” he snarled. “15 points from Gryffindor...each!” He spun on his heal (nearly colliding with the door) before storming back into his classroom.
He took a deep breath as he waited for the students to take their places and waved his wand for the ingredients of today’s potion to appear on the board.
“When your done bottle your potions and label them and bring them to me for marking.”
He went to sit wearily at his desk praying to all of the gods above and below that just this once Longbottem would deify the laws of inevitability and make this potion with out blowing up the class. How did that dunderhead ever get into this class anyway? He looked up and watched the class set about their task, at least he could depend on Granger and Malfoy to brew the potion correctly and then he would finally (oh joy to the world, finally!) be able to rid himself of this Hangover! His feet did a little dance under the table.
Exactly sixteen minutes and twenty-seven seconds into the lesson and the very moment Professor Snape had been starting to relax, a violent explosion sent hung-over professor and thirteen of his students flying across the dungeon. While the bookcase wasn’t exactly what could be interpreted as a soft landing, Snape didn’t envy the four students who managed to collide with the ingredients cabinet. The unfortunates in question now sported several fine tentacles and where covered in ugly purple blisters that appeared to be sprouting bright green hair at alarmingly rapid rate.
Knowing he couldn’t possibly have survived another Longbottom explosion in the condition he was in he spent the following minute trying to determine exactly how dead he was. Having never been dead in his past he was quite unsure as to exactly what the situation entailed. (Was he supposed to be looking for a bright light?) He couldn’t believe that finally, after all his years working for the Dark twit and as a Spy for the Order; Longbottom had achieved what hundreds of wizards and witches couldn’t and killed him! Well he certainly felt dead... If it was not for the quiet moans and movement in his lap, Snape may very well have given in to the voices in his head and have done something... well, not very Snape like... Discovering that some of his muscles did indeed work he looked down to find a large amount of golden brown hair, various books and splintered shelving covering his legs. The owner of the curly mane in question was annoying know-it-all Miss Granger and she was currently nuzzling his crotch! Pushing her of with somewhat more force than necessary, Snape stood only to fall over Mr Weasley and land on the-git-who-lived-to-make-his-life-a-misery. Cursing the day he was born he rolled off the idiot who was obviously in a daze and had started to fondle his backside! Snape was going to slaughter Longbottom...
~*~
“Longbottom!!!!!!” Snape growled as the terrified Gryffindor squealed and legged it out of the Dungeon bouncing off the walls as he rounded the corners.
“You can run Longbottom but you can hide!” Snape stormed after him his wand drawn ready to hex the balls off the little miscreant.
“P-p-professor I-I-I’m sorry!” Neville wailed as he ran for his life and his manhood.
“Come here you little squib!”
“Never!” Neville squeaked
After fifteen minutes of playing ‘round and round the castle’ Snape lost Longbottom near the green houses but continued to stalk in the direction he was sure that Neville had fled in.
“Here kitty, kitty, kitty.” Snape growled as he looked under benches and past vines hoping somehow the boy had managed to get himself eaten by one of the carnivorous plants but fearing the plants had more taste.
When it had started to get dark, Snape hadn’t noticed. One thing you could say about him was he was determined and when he had his mind set you couldn’t change it...
“Longbottom I’m going to find you eventually and your going to wish you’d let me kill you in the dungeons rather than stringing it out.” He looked under a pot laden bench, sneering into the darkness. Nope he wasn’t there either...
“Severus is that you?” A sickly girly voice asked.
He froze. No....it... she couldn’t have found him already....Any colour he had in his face quickly drained away along with any kind of decorum he once possessed... Not even giving a second though as to why, Snape ran. Snape had never ran as fast before. In fact he never ran but on this occasion he ran and you couldn’t see him for dust. Longbottom could most defiantly wait, right now he needed to get away from that....that.....*shudder*
Only another alcohol induced coma could save him now.
~*~*~*~
A/N: *sigh* Snape is at it again! Tut tut. Lol sorry it took so long for me to update but my muse decided to go on holiday and neglected to tell me when it would be back. *sob* didn’t even get a post card! As always I apologise for my pathetic, grammar, spelling, writing style and ability etc, etc. Its more difficult to put down on paper what is in my head than I originally thought. Wish I could just take out my brain stick it on a piece of paper and you all understand what I mean. Lol I can dream....well not that I particularly want to take out my brain......I’ll shut up now.
StormAz – I shall join you in that shudder. Glad you like this, hope this chapter doesn’t disappoint.
Medea – You flatter me.....I like it! *hugs* Hope you like this chapter, things are going to get progressively worse for our dear professor....
JTBJAB – Glad you liked the flitwick part. *sniggers* I doubt it will be the last we see of him......
Daygonna – Sorry to keep you waiting, hope this chapter is up to scratch. Yes I kind of like him in denial....
Katie K – Well it’s not soon but it’s here finally. I’m planning on chaining my muse down when it looks like it’s thinking of leaving again.
Anon – Glad you like this and I know what you mean about my writing. I’m trying to correct that but it will take me a while. Hopefully I will find a beta soon who can sort that out. Hope you like this chapter.
To all of you, who read and didn’t review, thank you for doing so anyway! I know it’s an effort sometimes to do it and your hits mean a lot to me anyway.
If anymore of you who have read this chapter feel so inclined please, please review! It really helps me write and I do believe I’m becoming quite addicted!
I haven’t got a beta yet and after your kind reviews for the last chapters I thought I would keep going until the time you decide you hate me lol. Oh yes and any flames will be reported to my team of rabid ferrets. I’m thinking of breeding them with rabid badgers....any idea on how we can get them to fly?
Oh and another sorry for the long wait. Full explanation at the bottom. Hope you still like me. Lol
Chapter 3: Chase me; chase me I’m a daffodil.
Snape sat in his dark classroom trying hard to focus on his lesson plan. He was seriously contemplating opening another bottle of Ogden’s by the time his first class arrived. He could here Malfoy’s sickening drawl and Parkinson’s high pitched laughter coming from the corridor. ‘Kill’ A little voice in his head said suggestively. “I bloody well wish.” He muttered to himself as he read the same line again that he had been reading for the last 10 minutes. It was a quick look at the clock and Weasely’s raised voice that finally made him get up and open the door, muttering obscenities under his breath that would make a sailor blush.
He swung open the door with his usual vigour regretting it immediately when the loud bang as it hit the wall echoed in his head making it even more sore if that was at all possible.
“Will you kindly keep your voices down!” He growled through gritted teeth.
Malfoy hand his wand drawn as did Crabbe and Goyle and they where pointed determinedly at the dream team who as usual stood opposite wands drawn also...It didn’t take a genius to work out what was going on here...
“Put your wands away!” he snarled. “15 points from Gryffindor...each!” He spun on his heal (nearly colliding with the door) before storming back into his classroom.
He took a deep breath as he waited for the students to take their places and waved his wand for the ingredients of today’s potion to appear on the board.
“When your done bottle your potions and label them and bring them to me for marking.”
He went to sit wearily at his desk praying to all of the gods above and below that just this once Longbottem would deify the laws of inevitability and make this potion with out blowing up the class. How did that dunderhead ever get into this class anyway? He looked up and watched the class set about their task, at least he could depend on Granger and Malfoy to brew the potion correctly and then he would finally (oh joy to the world, finally!) be able to rid himself of this Hangover! His feet did a little dance under the table.
Exactly sixteen minutes and twenty-seven seconds into the lesson and the very moment Professor Snape had been starting to relax, a violent explosion sent hung-over professor and thirteen of his students flying across the dungeon. While the bookcase wasn’t exactly what could be interpreted as a soft landing, Snape didn’t envy the four students who managed to collide with the ingredients cabinet. The unfortunates in question now sported several fine tentacles and where covered in ugly purple blisters that appeared to be sprouting bright green hair at alarmingly rapid rate.
Knowing he couldn’t possibly have survived another Longbottom explosion in the condition he was in he spent the following minute trying to determine exactly how dead he was. Having never been dead in his past he was quite unsure as to exactly what the situation entailed. (Was he supposed to be looking for a bright light?) He couldn’t believe that finally, after all his years working for the Dark twit and as a Spy for the Order; Longbottom had achieved what hundreds of wizards and witches couldn’t and killed him! Well he certainly felt dead... If it was not for the quiet moans and movement in his lap, Snape may very well have given in to the voices in his head and have done something... well, not very Snape like... Discovering that some of his muscles did indeed work he looked down to find a large amount of golden brown hair, various books and splintered shelving covering his legs. The owner of the curly mane in question was annoying know-it-all Miss Granger and she was currently nuzzling his crotch! Pushing her of with somewhat more force than necessary, Snape stood only to fall over Mr Weasley and land on the-git-who-lived-to-make-his-life-a-misery. Cursing the day he was born he rolled off the idiot who was obviously in a daze and had started to fondle his backside! Snape was going to slaughter Longbottom...
~*~
“Longbottom!!!!!!” Snape growled as the terrified Gryffindor squealed and legged it out of the Dungeon bouncing off the walls as he rounded the corners.
“You can run Longbottom but you can hide!” Snape stormed after him his wand drawn ready to hex the balls off the little miscreant.
“P-p-professor I-I-I’m sorry!” Neville wailed as he ran for his life and his manhood.
“Come here you little squib!”
“Never!” Neville squeaked
After fifteen minutes of playing ‘round and round the castle’ Snape lost Longbottom near the green houses but continued to stalk in the direction he was sure that Neville had fled in.
“Here kitty, kitty, kitty.” Snape growled as he looked under benches and past vines hoping somehow the boy had managed to get himself eaten by one of the carnivorous plants but fearing the plants had more taste.
When it had started to get dark, Snape hadn’t noticed. One thing you could say about him was he was determined and when he had his mind set you couldn’t change it...
“Longbottom I’m going to find you eventually and your going to wish you’d let me kill you in the dungeons rather than stringing it out.” He looked under a pot laden bench, sneering into the darkness. Nope he wasn’t there either...
“Severus is that you?” A sickly girly voice asked.
He froze. No....it... she couldn’t have found him already....Any colour he had in his face quickly drained away along with any kind of decorum he once possessed... Not even giving a second though as to why, Snape ran. Snape had never ran as fast before. In fact he never ran but on this occasion he ran and you couldn’t see him for dust. Longbottom could most defiantly wait, right now he needed to get away from that....that.....*shudder*
Only another alcohol induced coma could save him now.
~*~*~*~
A/N: *sigh* Snape is at it again! Tut tut. Lol sorry it took so long for me to update but my muse decided to go on holiday and neglected to tell me when it would be back. *sob* didn’t even get a post card! As always I apologise for my pathetic, grammar, spelling, writing style and ability etc, etc. Its more difficult to put down on paper what is in my head than I originally thought. Wish I could just take out my brain stick it on a piece of paper and you all understand what I mean. Lol I can dream....well not that I particularly want to take out my brain......I’ll shut up now.
StormAz – I shall join you in that shudder. Glad you like this, hope this chapter doesn’t disappoint.
Medea – You flatter me.....I like it! *hugs* Hope you like this chapter, things are going to get progressively worse for our dear professor....
JTBJAB – Glad you liked the flitwick part. *sniggers* I doubt it will be the last we see of him......
Daygonna – Sorry to keep you waiting, hope this chapter is up to scratch. Yes I kind of like him in denial....
Katie K – Well it’s not soon but it’s here finally. I’m planning on chaining my muse down when it looks like it’s thinking of leaving again.
Anon – Glad you like this and I know what you mean about my writing. I’m trying to correct that but it will take me a while. Hopefully I will find a beta soon who can sort that out. Hope you like this chapter.
To all of you, who read and didn’t review, thank you for doing so anyway! I know it’s an effort sometimes to do it and your hits mean a lot to me anyway.
If anymore of you who have read this chapter feel so inclined please, please review! It really helps me write and I do believe I’m becoming quite addicted!