In a London House

Part 3

Remus closed the bedroom door behind him with a soft click, and inhaled a deep breath. Spring rain and autumn leaves and forest soil, and as Remus closed his eyes he could see those sparkling blue eyes and that wide, ivory grin as clear as if Sirius was standing right in front of him.

Of course, Sirius was dead, so all Remus had were distant memories of better times, sneaking around Hogwarts, snogging in broom closets and fucking in the Astronomy Tower.

\"Sirius,\" Remus breathed, his voice tainted with longing and hope. But as he opened his eyes, all he saw was Sirius\' empty bed, a clear reminder that his friend, his first lover, wasn\'t there to listen to his worries and clap him on his back and tell him that things would be all right in the end.

Remus stepped up to the bed, and stroked the covers with a gentle hand, as one might stroke the naked body of a lover.

\"Sirius,\" he said, his voice even now. \"Why aren\'t you here when I need you?\"

Closing his eyes again, Remus sat down on the edge of the bed, and then shifted his legs onto the mattress and lay down, his head sinking into the pillow that instantly surrounded him with Sirius\' familiar scent.

\"I need you to tell me to keep my paws off your godson, Sirius,\" Remus whispered, his palms flat against the covers as if to steady himself. \"I need you to tell me I\'m a dirty, old wolf for thinking that way about James\' son.\"

Silence was the only reply Remus got, and he released a shaky breath before a strangled chuckle escaped him.

\"You know, I\'m not even sure if you\'d tell me that. You might as well say: \'Moony, you\'ve got a trick or two to teach that boy. If he wants to learn it, it might just as well be with you\'.\"

Remus licked his lips, blinking up at the ceiling. \"Would you, Sirius? Would you tell me it\'s all right? Would you give me your blessing?\"

Vague images of Harry\'s damp, naked skin drifted into Remus\' mind, and his body responded at once, heat gathering in his groin.

\"I\'m hard for him, Padfoot.\" Remus trailed a hand down his chest, cupping his hardening cock through his robes. \"Look at me. I\'m hard for your godson.\"

Moaning, Remus rolled over, burying his face in the pillow that could be Sirius\' flesh if he imagined it hard enough, and rubbing his groin against the sheets. If he could believe Sirius was there, Sirius was looking at him, maybe he could forget about Harry. He reached for his robes with trembling fingers, tugged them open so that his throbbing prick was released, and thrust against the bed.

\"Sirius,\" he breathed into the pillow, his eyes squeezed shut, concentrating on the feeling of his cock stroking across soft sheets, imagining it was Sirius\' skin. He thrust harder, hands clawing at the pillow, breath hitching, and focusing on memories of Sirius crawling up his body, Sirius licking his throat, Sirius thrusting inside of him, Sirius moaning his name.

\"Gods, Sirius.\" He rocked his hips helplessly, lost in the feeling of pleasure building in his sac, and unaware that memories of bright blue eyes morphed into green, a wide grin turned into a shy smile, and long, black hair became short and unruly.

\"Fuck, Harry,\" Remus cried, his hips bucking as he climaxed hard, his release lost between his trembling body and the bed of his dead friend.

Remus sed ded down, unable to move, and he almost didn\'t hear the door click shut and footsteps move quickly down the hall.