Dearest Harry - Eileen's Story

Hi there ~ prepare yourselves for yet another winge! I have been having problems with the Internet, plus I have been working on a fic for the Pimp_my_3somes fest on LJ url here: http://community.livejournal.com/pimp_my_3some/ - if you want to read the fic that is. I would highly recommend them, they look fantastic. It is an anonymous fest though, so you'll just have to guess who I am! Therefore, with all these woes this poor story has had to take a back seat.

Also this chappie has not been betaed. Everyone who betas for me has major RL issues right now, but I have two more chapters nearly ready. So if you fancy helping me out you can e-mail me at quill_lumos@yahoo.co.uk. Meanwhile if you spot any mistakes just let me know. ~ Lucie



Chapter Twenty Nine

Riddle – Severus refused to call him Voldemort - had made them kneel and then he had taken their wands.

They had been there for at least fifteen minutes whilst Riddle waited for Ginny’s life to leach away. Arthur had tried twice more to get to his daughter and the dark haired young man had finally petrified him. He seemed reluctant to kill them or not exactly reluctant but not quite ready yet. This version of the Dark Lord seemed to be in his late teens or very early twenties. He didn’t seem to know who Severus was though he did seem somewhat puzzled by him. He kept glancing at him, that smooth brow of his furrowed as if he were struggling to understand something that was just a little bit beyond him right now, hovering out of reach.

“There is a link between us isn’t there?”

He had walked over to them

Severus was still kneeling, hands on his head as instructed Arthur lay prone beside him

He put the tip of Harry’s wand under Severus chin and titled his face towards him.

“Why do I feel that you are connected to me?” he asked.

“There is a sort of tingle when I look at you, a vibration.”

He stared at Severus’ arm.

“I think it comes from there,” he said musingly.

“Roll up your sleeve I want to see for myself.”

He stood back, just out of Severus’ reach. Even in this form he was powerful but Severus thought that he maybe able to take him down if he could just get up from his knees. Riddle forestalled him though, he pointed Harry’s wand at Arthur’s head.

“Slowly,” he said, “hands where I can see them and any sudden moves and the old man dies.”

Severus tried stalling for time, though he had no idea what he thought he might do in that time but he had to do something. Arthur was incapacitated, every one else was asleep and Ginny was dying.

“Look,” he began nobody here wants to hurt you, “If you just left no-one would follow you, just leave the girl an….”

“Shut up!” Riddle said, “Just shut up and do as you are told. Roll up your sleeve and show me your arm or you will find yourself kneeling there completely naked!”

Severus rolled up his sleeve.

Riddle smiled.

“So I did it then? The Dark Mark! I bound my followers to me,” a smug self-satisfied smile

He stared at Severus, “you don’t seem particularly respectful though!

“Why did you not welcome me back the moment I appeared?”

Those full lips of his twisted themselves into a sneer.

“You’re a traitor aren’t you?”.

Severus’ heart sank

Riddle stepped forward again and used the wand to flick casually at Severus’ hair,

“I don’t like traitors! What is your name, traitor?”

Severus had spent too many years on his knees to want to do this anymore.

“Oh for Merlin’s sake just get on with it!” he snapped, “I thought that needless verbosity was something that came on you with age. But it seems I was wrong you were always a complete wanker weren’t you?”

Riddle bellowed his anger.

He drew back his hand and slapped Severus across the face cutting open his lip and sending him flying to the floor.

“I’m not going to kill you quickly traitor, there are several nice slow curses that I can perform. It will give me something to watch while the girl dies.”

He smiled at Severus, he was darkly handsome and the smile graced his features even more. Severus thought he preferred Voldemort, as he was now, deformed, ugly. At least he looked evil. This earlier version of Voldemort, wore a face of charm and beauty.

Severus decided he would not go quietly he would scream with every curse. Eileen would understand, that it was a signal he just prayed that they would get Harry out.

Please let Harry live, he whispered to himself, to any gods that might happen to be listening and who would take pity on a remorse filled ex Death Eater.

But Riddle wasn’t looking at Severus anymore. He had been distracted by some one or some thing that stood in the doorway behind Severus.

“Hello little boy,” he said with that charming smile of his, “have you come to join the party?”

Severus’ nearly wept

“Hello Tom,” said Harry, because who else would walk into a kitchen containing a raving madman without even the protection of a wand other than Harry?

Anyone else would have run screaming from the room by now.

“I think you should let them go.” Harry said evenly, “because if you don’t I shall have to kill you!”

Riddle started to laugh

Severus turned to look at his nephew. He was standing barefoot in the doorway. His hair was all dishevelled and his clothes looked like he had slept in them, which of course he had.

Harry was smiling too. He wouldn’t seem to meet Severus’ eye. No his eyes were firmly fixed on Tom Riddle.

Tom stopped laughing

And looked at the boy steadily for a moment, without blinking.

“Oh please, let me see you try!” he said

Harry’s smile widened and he began to run towards Riddle, Severus shouted at the same time

“No Harry!”

Tom was distracted for just a moment by Severus’ shout because when he turned back to hex Harry it was too late and the boy had already transformed into his animagus shape. The huge lion hit Riddle squarely in the chest and together they fell sprawling to the ground.

For a moment there was chaos. The lion was growling. It had buried its teeth in Riddles chest and seemed to be happily chewing its way through his ribs; the sounds of crunching bone and ripping flesh were repugnant

Tom Riddle was screaming and thrashing about, trying to dislodge the large creature that had him pinned to the floor. He was not having much success, there was blood everywhere, his struggles were growing ever weaker and he was futilely trying to push the lion away.

The screams grew ever more frantic, ragged, shrill. Finally there was total silence.

It was as if time had stood still. In the distance Severus could hear thudding, urgent footsteps pounding across the ceiling, heading for the stairs. The screams had wakened the household it seemed.

But in the kitchen for the beat of a heart the participants of the grotesque tableau seemed frozen.

Arthur was trying to stand. He was weakened by the curses that Voldemort had fired at him and from the way he was cradling his arm, Severus feared that it might be broken. Ginny was stirring. Her eyes were not yet open but she was murmuring quietly to herself. Arthur gave up on standing then and began to crawl across the flagstones towards his daughter’s body. Severus heard his quiet sobs.

Riddle lay still, his prone form was beginning to fade, melt beneath the lion that still straddled him.

Then without warning Harry transformed again. The lion had leapt explosively from its kill; the boy hit the ground running, heading for the dresser.

He grabbed the sledge hammer that was lying there with both hands, the one that Severus had fallen over some fifteen times and swung it high above his head, and now Harry was screaming, it was as if he were calling upon remnants of strength in order to wield the weighty object. For a split second it stood straight up like a sword of justice and then Severus’ eye was caught by a burst of light.

The locket was burning; Harry had set in on fire

With a final yell Harry brought the monstrous hammer down on the kitchen floor with a tremendous crash. The very stones themselves cracked open. There was a flash of very bright light and a huge bang and Harry was thrown backwards hard against the kitchen wall.

Everything was still, especially Harry

Severus took a moment to stand, he was trembling. The events of the past few moments had left no time for consideration whatsoever. Harry had acted with a speed that was astonishing. Swiftly and seemingly without qualm he had dispatched Tom Riddle yet again

It had all happened so fast and he was not quite sure what to do first. He was playing catch up with Harry Potter yet again

Arthur had reached his daughter who was beginning to stir, he sat beside her looking pale, he was shaking violently.

With the disappearance of Riddle, - because he had totally disappeared - it seemed as though the Petrificus Totalis that Arthur had been under had totally evaporated.

Severus went over to where Harry had landed almost reluctant to look. He was lying in the corner like a pile of discarded rags and Severus immediately searched for a heartbeat on finding it he let out a breath that he did not realise that he had been holding

“Foolish Gryffindor!” he said and was immensely cheered when Harry groaned. Green eyes opened slowly. Looked blearily at Severus, then shut again rapidly as if the dim light from the kitchen was as bright as any sun.

“Ow my head!” he moaned and for the second time in a month was promptly sick all over Severus’ shoes.


Harry’s head was pounding. He still felt really, really nauseous.

Grimmauld Place had descended into total chaos after he had taken Voldemort out again. He had heard the voice and recognised it immediately. There couldn’t be many people alive today who would recognise the voice of a young Tom Riddle. Sadly Harry was one of those people.

So was Ginny.

The girl was crying hysterically right now and everyone else was shouting at each other and more or less ignoring her.

Harry went over and sat beside her. He felt ice cold. He had killed again. This time deliberately. When Quirrell had died, incinerated by his touch, Harry had still been a child, too young to understand properly that a man had died. That death had not been deliberate.

But this time, this time he had killed. He had ripped and torn at Riddle’s flesh and in his animagus form it had not felt like murder. It had been merely survival.

Pride threatened, kill threat.

That had been Harry’s only thought. When he had transformed, he had let instinct guide him. But now he was human again and he felt the heavy weight of guilt and self loathing drape across his shoulders like a winter cloak.

“You alright Gin?” he asked quietly, gently taking her hand in his own

Ginny was trying to control her sobs and failing miserably.

So Harry put his arm around her shoulder. “It’ll be okay Gin,” he said, “he’s gone now.”

Ginny turned large watery eyes on him

“But for how long Harry?” she asked in a desperate voice. “He nearly killed me again. He gets inside me and it is as if my brain is fogged, as if I have no will of my own. That locket called to me and I had to find it, I just kept looking until I did.”

“What if he does kill me next time Harry? I can’t resist him it’s just too hard.”

“Yes you can Ginny. You are strong and feisty and no one can tell you what to do.”

But Harry, you don’t understand when he’s inside me, when I am possessed, it’s almost like I want him there with me. Like it feels right………But now I feel violated, like I have a disgusting taste in my mouth that I’ll never be free of”

She shuddered.

“I know Gin,” Harry said really quietly, “I can still taste him too.”

“What happened Harry?” Ginny asked quietly

“Yes Harry! We’d all like to know that! What on earth did you think you were doing?” It was Severus’ voice. Sardonic and drawling.

Cold fire was sparking in his eyes and Harry got the feeling that Severus was very pissed off indeed!

“I was saving your life you sanctimonious prick!” he said, “If you are about to shout at me again then you can just fuck off!”

Harry’s voice broke on the last word. It felt sore and scratchy; the roar that had been so unconsciously ripped from him had been tremendously loud.

The next thing he knew he was pressed against Severus’ chest, his uncle’s arms tightly wrapped around him, holding him close.

“I know you were, you foolish child!” Severus said, “But you would have done better to keep yourself safe, I am not important.”

“You’re important to me.” Harry blurted. His voice was muffled by Severus embrace

Severus grasped his shoulders and pushed him gently back so that he could examine Harry.

“You mean that don’t you?” he used a voice that was more gentle, more understanding than any he had ever heard Snape use before.

Harry shrugged but found his cheeks heating under Severus’ calm regard. “You must take more care of yourself Harry, but I am very grateful that you have saved me, saved us all, once again.” His eyes softened, “tell me child, are you okay?”

There was such tender concern in his uncle’s voice that Harry felt awful. He didn’t know how to deal with this. It hurt. Severus cared didn’t he, he truly cared? A few weeks ago Severus had said horrible things to Harry, but now he was being so nice, understanding, like he really understood Harry.

Harry felt at a loss about how to deal with this.

He felt Ginny take his hand again, pulling him away from Severus

“Harry,” she said. “Please Harry, please help me.”

It was if she needed to be close to him. The Weasley family had been drifting back and forth, alternately comforting Ginny, berating her and then berating each other. For not noticing what she was up to, for not keeping a better watch, for not taking better care of her after second year. It was so loud and dramatic and so not what Ginny needed right then.

Ginny was trembling now

He smiled up at his uncle and then turned back to Ginny to give her a hug, a proper hug.

She didn’t have to explain what it felt like to him, having Voldemort trick you, use you. Harry had seen Arthur Weasley on the floor, bleeding, in pain. He had seen Ginny dying at Riddle’s hand, yet again. Being helpless while he twisted things, made lies seem real.

Oh Sirius!

Shouting at Ginny, berating her wouldn’t make a difference Harry knew. It was hardly her fault after all. The only thing that would give her peace would be Voldemort’s death, only then could she be free of the stench of him. But Harry felt cold at the very thought of taking a life. He would have to, he knew that. But he also knew that when he shut his eyes tonight he would see Riddle die at the end of sharp claws and teeth, time and time again.

Ginny snuggled against him, her sobs had stilled, but she was warm and soft and he felt protective of her. The scent of Ginny, the rightness of this.

They had not been this close since Hogwarts, not physically at least. He had seen very little of her the past few weeks. This felt right, this felt safe. The monster in his chest had woken.

All at once Harry understood

The monster in his chest!

“Voldemort!” He shouted

Everyone one in the room stopped arguing at once and turned to look at him in horror. Ginny’s eyes widened.

Harry loved Draco. He loved him with all that he was. He knew what love felt like now and he never had before. What Harry felt for Ginny was not love, it was obsession, possessiveness. As if she belonged to him

The monster in his chest!

“Ginny!” he said, he gently tipped her chin so that she would look up at him. “The Horcruxes! I know how we can get them!” Harry was excited now.

The monster growled.

“You! There is something about you!” It must be linked to the diary, what happened in the Chamber of Secrets. They are attracted to you! The Horcruxes. That’s how we get him, that’s how we extract the soul pieces!”

He swung her around. Ginny’s mouth dropped open, she gasped, “We’ve got him Gin, we’ve got the snakefaced bastard!! You call him out, I’ll kill him! We’ll do it together.” He laughed

He had had a revelation

He couldn’t help himself he was so elated that he dropped a kiss on those still wide-open lips.

The room erupted with noise

Molly started shouting and weeping. A plethora of Weasleys were shouting too. Loud opposing opinions about what Harry was saying, Eileen was trying to calm things and to reach her grandson. Severus was arguing with Molly who was rapidly becoming hysterical

But for Harry suddenly time stood still. He looked up to see Draco standing at the kitchen door watching him, with a look of hurt on his face.

Draco’s lip was trembling; he appeared to be holding back tears

Harry wanted to go to him, to tell him what he had realised. That he had never loved Ginny, that it had been Voldemort all along. The Horcrux had been insidiously pulling him towards Ginny all of last year. That he knew the difference now because of Draco, because he truly loved Draco, he knew what love was.

He opened his mouth to call out to his lover, to call him over to tell him his discovery

But Draco spoke first.

“You fucking bastard Potter!” he said and then he turned and walked away