When Living Ain\'t Easy

I offer most sincere apologies for not having this up last week. As many of you know, me and my family live in America -- hence, Christmas holidays, which effectively started last Wednesday. Having two teenaged offspring, our home is frequently bombarded by their numerous friends. We've been reluctant (and terribly tired!) hosts to no less than three, often as many as twelve, teens per day since. I don't think I need to mention how difficult it is to concentrate on writing when I'm the sole chaperone for co-ed visits of the pubescent variety *eyeroll* Finally we managed to send the last of them home this afternoon, and with a relatively quiet house at my disposal I've tried to make this chapter a bit longer and... meatier.

Many thanks to those of you who have left comments so far. It brightens my day every time I read your kind thoughts and opinions.

Aaaaaaand last, a very happy holidays to one and all! Regardless of which religious/political/territorial customs you follow, may the season bring you peace and contentment and satisfactory memories to hold you through the coming year.

~ * ~

Chapter Twenty-Seven : Lie to me, please, I beg you. Uh huh.

"Severus, you may enter."

Head bowed, the Potions Master's eyes flickered across the darkened room from beneath his eyelashes. As expected, there were only two others in the Dark Lord's audience chamber -- Pettigrew and Bellatrix. Severus allowed himself to relax just the tiniest bit. He approached the serpentine figure slowly, dropping down to one knee as he reached the pretentious 'throne' of his unwanted master. A skeletal hand appeared in front of his face and he immediately placed a kiss to the offered knuckles, inwardly shuddering at his actions.

"You may rise," the order came out sounding bland and bored, but a slight tremble from the clawed hand showed Riddle's suppressed excitement. "Do sit down, Severus." A flick of his wand summoned a comfortable sofa and low table, already laden with tea and refreshments. "When our dear Bella brought word of your current project, I found myself most interested. As you know, I have always fancied myself a... historian of some accomplishment -- ancient rites, long-forgotten potions, and such. Of course there have always been rumors of various methods to bring about eternal youth, a child's curiosity, an old man's fantasy. But you, Severus, are far from those gullible masses. Do tell us what evidence you have gleaned that your new hobby is founded in hard facts."

Wasting no time, Severus did as he was instructed, sinking gracefully onto the sofa and fixing his teacup to taste (not that he had any intention of ingesting anything in the Dark Lord's camp). Eyes set submissively at his 'master's' knees, he drew out the carefully prepared scroll and laid it on the table within easy reach.

"Thank you for sparing time for this interview, my lord," he began, voice pitched low and even. "While assisting the new Headmistress in clearing out Dumbledore's office, I ran across this weathered parchment. Naturally, there was no opportunity to determine what I had discovered at the time, and with the end of term upon us I was forced to wait until after the imbeciles had left. I confess that, even with the unimpeded use of Hogwarts' entire resources at my disposal, I am still uncertain on several of the markings; however, I have managed to translate the bulk of the text." Here Severus cleared his throat and allowed a measure of excitement to cloud his tone, "My lord, I have no reason to believe that this is less than authentic. The procedure is very thorough, from a series of simple charms to three intricate potions and a combination of ritualistic incantations, even going so far as to detail the ... side effects, if you will, to be expected."

Slitted red eyes broke out of their glassy, dreamlike trance to focus fully on the Potions Master once more. "And what would be the 'catch', Snape?"

Drawing on reserves of strength and courage that could (if he had not argued with the Sorting Hat) have placed him in Godric's House, Severus slid his eyes up to briefly meet the Dark Lord's. "I cannot perform a trial run without possibly giving eternity to someone less worthy than yourself. Also, from what I understand, there is still a slight chance that you could be banished, my lord. Not killed outright, as any injury would regenerate in time, but exorcised from this plane of existence. It is but a remote possibility, Master! Our enemies would have no idea of the combination of spells necessary to effect your expulsion, nor is there anyone within their precious Order who would know where to begin such a search. It is my belief that there is little risk involved in attempting the procedure. I humbly await your instructions, my lord." And from his seat, Severus bowed low to the psychopath who held his life and health in his scab-covered hands.

For several tense minutes, the occupants of the room sat in silence waiting to hear from their obviously inhuman master. Covertly, Severus watched the rat fiddle with his silver hand -- he could practically hear the turncoat's thoughts race in his desire to be the 'test subject', not that it was likely to happen. Similarly, Bellatrix bounced lightly on her toes with the manic energy she was now known for. It hardly took a genius to see into her mind, to interpret the surge of lust that ran across her face at the idea that she could have her first love's body back. He suppressed a grimace of revulsion at the memory of walking in on the pair not too long ago.

"You have ever had my best interests at heart, dear Severus," Riddle's words brought his followers from their own thoughts. Only Pettigrew showed any outward surprise, and would be punished for it soon enough. "Very well, I shall trust you to begin preparations at once. With the bumbling old fool out of our way, we have ample time to undertake such a... momentous endeavor." His eyes slitted to crimson slashes, issuing their own warning. "But Severus, my little snake, it would be most beneficial to your health not to dally about. Three days should provide you with enough time for the first stage, yes?"

All he could do was nod quickly in agreement, breathing a mental sigh of relief that (so far) their plans were proceeding nicely. "Of course, my lord. You are most generous to your humble servant."

~ * ~

While the Head of Slytherin had his meeting, Hermione and Draco helped Harry smuggle into Hogwarts. As there was only fireplace at the safehouse, and Lucius was planted in front of it attempting to read until his lover returned, the trio of conspirators combined efforts to create a timed portkey -- he would have only ninety minutes to complete his task before it activated to bring him home. Silent hugs were passed around, barely managing to release before all three students were dropped into the Headmistress' office.

"Well hello, Mr. Potter. I did not expect company this evening," McGonagall said in her driest voice. "Please find a comfortable seat and I shall call for tea."

Harry flopped into the hideous floral chair once favored by his old mentor, forcing himself not to dwell on the loss that still made his heart ache for the old man.

"Sorry for just dropping in, Professor. It's just... That is..." He coughed and shifted nervously in his seat. "How much did Headmaster Dumbledore tell you about his plans, ma'am? I need to know how much information we share."

Minerva nodded her tartan-clad head slowly. "I had anticipated this conversation, Harry, and hope to relieve your concerns at least somewhat." A random house elf popped in with tea and sliced sandwiches, granting them both a moment to collect their thoughts. "During last year's winter holiday, Albus made full disclosure to me -- his own words, which I have long since learned are questionable at best -- about the situation with You-Know-Who's horcruxes. And what you are destined to accomplish. He also made it quite clear that I must trust Professor Snape regardless of his actions or words to indicate any darker alliance. Surely this meeting is not about-"

"No ma'am! Pardon my interruption, but that's not it at all." Drinking a too-large gulp of tea, Harry spluttered for a moment before gasping, "Maybe I should be more specific... Headmistress, are you now the officially unofficial leader of the Order of the Phoenix?"

The piercing gaze that once came from twinkling blue eyes now pinned Harry into place in a hazel stare. He felt his mental shields tested, and relaxed them a tiny bit out of courtesy for his former Head of House. Apparently satisfied, the witch straightened in her chair.

"Harry Potter, as a member of the aforementioned group I advise you to secure your thoughts."

"Headmistress McGonagall, I have worked long and hard to be capable of such methods. Rest assured that this is an important matter, or else I would never-"

"Oh do settle down, Potter. And yes, I suppose I am the new leader. Blast Albus for leaving it all to me," she grumbled, grinning ruefully behind her cup. "Whatever it is you need to discuss, perhaps we can do so soon?"

Holding up both hands in supplication, Harry snickered at the older woman's antics. "Alright then, here's the thing... Dumbledore made plans for me for this summer, tutors if you will, and I wanted to know if you were aware of... the details."

"I did know something about it, yes Potter. And do please tell me that Severus has not turned you into a newt yet. Merlin's sake, term only ended five days ago! Surely you haven't driven each other 'round the bend so soon."

Eyes twinkling bright enough to rival the recently dead wizard, Harry laughed aloud at her accusations. "No ma'am! We're actually... getting along quite well. I, um, was wondering though, if you knew *all* of Dumbledore's instructions."

A mighty eyeroll met his ambiguous request for information. "Potter. Harry... unlike Albus, I am not a fan of riddles and un-statements. We must learn to speak more plainly with each other than either of us is accustomed, thanks to a certain meddlesome old *cough* coot."

Choking on a sip of tea, Harry's laughter joined the Headmistress' deep chuckle in the circular room. Only after the witch's clock chimed the hour did they break apart, as the young wizard remembered his time limit.

"True enough. Alright, how about I ask a few questions first... unless you want to begin?" A wrinkled hand waved him on. "Right then. According to Professor Snape, this summer I am to have two tutors. Were you aware of this?"

"Albus did mention something like that, yes. He refrained from divulging the name of of your second instructor, however."

"Ah... I'm not sure it's my place to say, ma'am. I can tell you that I've reason to trust them both, and that the second might make a fair replacement for Slughorn for the new term. We've talked about the possibility, both to keep training beyond summer and to insure his safety when Snape and I come back here in the fall. Uh... if you need another opinion about the situation, you can always ask 'Mione. She's visiting for a few days, and has had more fun than I can handle ganging up on me with my instructors." Harry added an eyeroll to the last, just for good measure.

Were twinkling eyes and penetrating stares a requirement for the job, or a benefit after taking control of Hogwarts Head position? McGonagall's gaze seemed to burn into his skin, making Harry's conscience twinge for the obvious omissions.

"Potter, I have yet to speak with Professor Snape about recent events, and have only begun my search for the various teaching positions that need to be filled. I do appreciate your input, but kindly recall who is responsible for the students' welfare, hmm?"

"Oh, of course! I'm sorry, Headmistress, really! I wasn't trying to usurp your prerogative, honestly... It was just a thought we had, since Sev-Snape has already worked with him and they'd do such a good job of splitting classwork and all. Which he'll need, cus he's got all that Head of House stuff as well, and he'll be twice as busy with his *other* job if things go to plan and-"

"If you would cease and desist, Mr. Potter, we might move on to the next item on your agenda."

Blushing brightly, Harry felt he would always be eleven in this daunting woman's eyes. "Of course, sorry ma'am. Anyways," he breathed deeply, "we've got a few good ideas about the remaining horcruxes, and will probably need to spend a couple of afternoons here for researching them. And, well, there's another matter that I haven't mentioned to anyone else, but you're the one person I'd like to be there when I have to talk with them..." Restless and nerve-wrought, the Gryffindor stood to pace the room. "Mrs. Weasley asked me to break up with Ginny, publicly and with everyone smiling to show no hard feelings. It's the public part that gets me -- doesn't she remember how dangerous it is for me to just buy school supplies? I was hoping, maybe, if you have time... would you go with me to meet them sometime in the next week or two?"

"Potter, it's not really my place-"

"Please ma'am, you're the closest thing I've got to a female relative anymore. I can't count on Mrs. Weasley that way now, and Merlin knows my aunt is... inappropriate for the job."

Bending her head down, Minerva rubbed aching eyes as she thought over the request. In truth, she had suspected something like this to happen. The magical world was every bit as gossip-ridden as the Muggle world could be, and worse when their target was the Boy-Who-Lived. She silently cursed Molly Weasley for putting her in this position. "Alright Harry, I shall owl you when it is time. Will you permit me to make the appropriate arrangements?"

"Yes, thank you ma'am." Harry sheepishly stared at his shoes, aware of the spectacle he had made of himself over such a trivial matter. A thought occurred to him, breaking through the more depressing subject of his former surrogate family. "Have I time to check out a book from the library, do you think?"

"I believe that can be arranged." The Headmistress stood from behind her desk, proceeding her favored student out of the office. "Surely you remember where the library is, Potter. Although, you seldom spend much time there without Ms. Granger's nattering invitation."

A sly grin. "Well, yeah, but I've carried her 'light reading material' often enough to find my way, even blindfolded!"

~ * ~

As luck would have it, Harry arrived back at the safehouse only minutes before Severus. Tantalizing aromas lured them toward the kitchen, where both brunets stopped dead in their tracks in stunned disbelief.

"That's good, Dray, keep stirring. See? It's just like brewing potions, really simple if you think about it. You should be quite good at cooking, if you've truly earned your marks."

"Why has no one ever told me how much fun this could be? And soothing too! You're right, Mia, it's so much like potions, even many of the same ingredients."

Before the returning duo could interrupt the younger blond's voyage of culinary discovery, Lucius slinked out of his chair at the table to urge them back into the hallway. A quick silencing charm later, he waited for shock to evolve into...

Snort. Snicker-snort. Chuckle. Harry doubled over, gasping for breath between full belly laughs. Severus wiped at his eyes to clear the tears of mirth away.

"Yes, yes, all terribly amusing. My son, whom everyone knows to be thoroughly incompetent and uninterested in menial labor, is having a grand time learning to cook from the Muggle-born know-it-all that has been his only academic rival for the past six years." Lucius allowed his own chuckle to break his train of thought. "If I were the suspicious sort, I might conclude that there is a rapidly developing undercurrent of attraction between them."

Another snort, more pronounced. "Luc, please, as if any of us who know you well would believe that you are *not* the 'suspicious' sort."

Followed closely by Harry's observation: "And even those of us who don't know you that well, but are learning quickly."

"Fine, gang up on me." The blond's lips formed into an attractive pout, ruined when he smirked at his companions. "Actually, please do. I've seen neither of you for more than an hour, yet here I stand, without having received a proper greeting. Oh woe is me!"

His dramatic monologue was interrupted by an enthusiastic hug and fast kiss from the younger brunet, with Severus joining the group to wrap his arms around both men. Satisfied with his mechanisms (however obvious), Lucius demanded kisses from both of his lovers in turn.

~ * ~

Dinner was... interesting. All five participants would later agree on only that one description to cover the informative gathering, or the meal provided by their dubious duo of dueling chefs.

As his first foray into cooking had given Draco a great deal of amusement -- pitting his skills at potion making against the enthusiastic, if somewhat bossy, teaching methods of the walking encyclopedia -- a wealth of different dishes was prepared. And so what, most of them would never be served together, but he had fun! It was up to each person to not pile their plates with conflicting foods, wasn't it? Chinese pork with plum sauce doesn't settle well with sage cornbread dressing. Everyone knew that.

Of course, there were two other reasons for the underlying tension at the table. Severus' interview with the Dark Lord, and Harry's impromptu meeting with Headmistress McGonagall.

"Before you ask, no, I was not cursed or otherwise abused while in the Dark Lord's presence. Although there was a point of contention that almost incurred his ire. Apparently, our 'master' has never felt the need to learn how to utilize his parseltongue ability with written words. Thus my delay in leaving his current stronghold, as I had to have him interpret the snake markings to complete my translation." Smirking wickedly at the memory of Riddle's embarrassment, Severus spooned a second helping of moo shu pork onto his plate. "It should be known that Pettigrew showed more than a passing interest in the text as well. Perhaps we can use his interest to our advantage?"

Hermione bounced in her seat, her hand sneaking up as if to answer the Professor's question before she recalled herself. "Wouldn't Voldie be angry if his full-time servant was caught, or just suspected, of 'stealing' such an important ritual? Let's sow dissension in the ranks!"

"Just so, Ms. Granger. I would be forced to offer twenty points to Gryffindor, if school was currently in session." A rolled rice pancake filled with shredded pork and tart plum sauce made its way to the Potions Master's mouth, where he hummed in pleasure. "Delightful, a job well done, both of you." He quickly finished the serving before continuing, "I've three days to collect the necessary items for step one. It must also be mentioned, something that relieves me quite a lot, that the Dark Lord appears to have more trust in me than ever before. We must proceed carefully if I am to maintain that opinion, however it surely can be used to our advantage."