Love is Blind

Chapter 25

Severus woke up with Hermione still sleeping in his arms.
The previous night’s discussion was still on his mind. He loved Hermione. He
knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. She seemed certain that he
would leave her when he found out of her barrenness. He would do anything to be
with her, child or no, although, the thought of her bearing his child was
wonderful to think about. Between the two of them, their minds were considered
part of the most intelligent in the wizarding world. Their magic was also very
powerful. Hermione could charm anything with or without a wand, better than any
pureblood he knew, besides maybe Dumbledore himself. There was no doubt that a
child from such a union would be a great wizard.

He looked over at her sleeping form and gently
brushed a few tendrils from her face. His breath caught in his throat when he
looked at her scars. After one night of the salve, the scars had softened and
diminished. The skin was almost smooth and perfect. He smiled to himself, pride
overflowing. He brushed his lips softly over her cheek as he got up to shower.

Hermione awoke to the feeling of someone staring at
her. She knew that she was in Severus’ bed, she remembered being curled with
him last night and she could smell his distinct scent. She feigned sleep as
Severus stared at her. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to face him yet. Last
night had been hard. She didn’t know exactly what made Severus realize that she
hadn’t had a menstrual cycle, and she wasn’t keen on finding out just yet.

His reaction to her injury was unsettling. He cried.
Was he crying over not having a child or was he crying in sympathy? Did he pity
her? She heard him say that he wouldn’t let her go, that he didn’t need a
child. But what if she did? She wanted to give him something no one else could.
Would he leave her to find someone who could give him a child? Did she want to
be the one to deny him such a thing?

She felt his lips softly graze her cheek and the
weight shift on the bed as he got up. After a few moments she heard the water
in the shower and knew that he was out of the room and would be occupied for at
least a few minutes. She wanted to cry. Hard. As a child she had always dreamed
of being swept off her feet and falling deeply in love. She did just that,
although she never expected it to be him. She dreamt of living the perfect
life, a good job, a wonderful, loving husband and at least two children, a boy
and a girl.

She shook her head to rid herself of such nonsense.
There was no use dwelling on dreams and wishes when you couldn’t have them. She
raised herself from bed, cast a few wandless cleansing charms and dressed.
Before Severus was out of the shower, she was outside walking toward the lake.

Severus emerged from the shower, refreshed. When he
walked into the bedroom, however, his heart dropped. Hermione was not in bed.
She would usually wait for him or join him in the shower and they would walk to
the Great Hall together. His heart ached that she wasn’t there. He loved their
morning bantering and chitchat. He loved having her hand in his. He loved the
fact she wanted to be next to him. Something was definitely bothering her.

rus rus had learned long ago that if Hermione was
upset and went off on her own, leave her be. He hated that, but he knew he
would probably make it worse by searching her out. He quickly dressed and
headed for breakfast. He entered the Great Hall and caught Albus’ eye.

“Albus, have you seen Hermione?” he asked the
headmaster as he sat in his seat at the Head Table.

Albus grinned at the concern heard in his potion
masters’ voice. “I saw her heading toward the lake a bit ago. Is everything all
right?”

Severus shook his head. “I’m not sure. But this is
not a conversation for this setting.” Albus nodded and they agreed to meet in
the headmaster’s office after the meal. Breakfast was quiet, much to the
irritation of Severus. Every time the door to the hall opened, Severus ventured
a glance to see if Hermione had returned. Alas, the end of the meal came and
Hermione had yet to surface.

Severus found himself, a little bit later sitting
across from the wizened old wizard and being offered a lemon drop. He politely
declined and waited for Albus to start. “Severus, what seems to be the matter?”

Severus looked dejectedly down at his hands. “I
don’t know. I returned from my shower to find Hermione gone. It hurt.” His
voice was soft and small. Albus had never seen him this heartbroken. “She only
goes to the lake when she wants to think. And I know that if she goes to be
alone, leave her alone.”

The old man smiled, he had a feeling of what
happened. But wasn’t sure. “Did you have an argument?”

“No.”

“Severus, you’re not helping me. What could be
bothering Miss Granger?”

Severus looked up and glared at his mentor. “She
told me something last night, and I think that she is under the impression that
I will leave her because of it.”

“So she told you about Lucius?” In any other
situation, Albus would have had to try to hold back a laugh at the younger
man’s shocked expression. “Yes, my boy. I know. I am the only one, besides you
and Hermione. She and I would have tea together every week and I was the only she she felt comfortable to confide in. She didn’t feel like a woman anymore.
She didn’t feel whole. I have tried many times to convince her that this may be
able to be corrected, and that it doesn’t effect her femininity or her
womanhood.”

“Albus, I thought she was pregnant.” Severus shook
his head lightly. “I thought she was pregnant and that she was afraid to tell
me. To be honest, I was excited. I never thought I would have a baby and the
idea of it was amazing. I think my excitement and the immediate disappointment
made her think that I would not want her because of it. I love her, Albus.” The
sincerity in his voice was something A had had never heard coming from this
man. It was a very pleasant change.

“Prove it to her.” Albus smiled and Severus looked
at him questioningly. “You know what you need to do. I am not saying that hav have to, but I know you want to.” Severus was confused. He stared at Albus and
his infernal tinkling eyes. Albus shook his head lightly and chuckled at the
obliviousness of the dark man. “You love her, she loves you. What does a man
usually do to prove he wants to spend the rest of his life with the woman he
loves?”

Severus’ eyes were as big as saucers when it dawned
on him. “Albus, would you mind covering my classes today? I think I have some
things to do.” Albus’ smile could not have been brighter and he agreed to take
over the classes while Severus did his business.

Severus walked out of the room with a quick, “Oh,
and Albus, don’t even think about coddling them.” All he could hear was Albus’
loud laughter coming from behind the large oak door.

Severus found Hermione still by the lake a few hours
later. He was walking back from Hogsmeade and changed his direction to where
she was sitting underneath the beech tree. “Hermione?” he asked softly as to
not startle her.

“Hello,” she said flatly. Severus could hear the
pain in her voice. She was still under the impression that he would leave. She
was trying to distance herself from him. He, himself had done it far too many
time to count, so he knew exactly what she was doing.

He sat down beside her on the rock and put his arm
around her, pulling her close. She stiffened slightly, but he ignored it.
“Love, what’s wrong?”

She sighed heavily and after a few quiet moments she
asked, “What made you think that I was pregnant?”

He knew she was upset about this, but he didn’t
expect that particular question. “I was going through the ingredients for the
second potion and one of the main catalysts is menstrual blood. We both know
that it is more effective for a woman to use her own in a potion. I went
through the timeline to see if we would be able to get it in time. I then
realized that you had not had a cycle since we started making love.” He thought
he saw a hint of a smile cross her face as he said ‘maklovelove.’

“Severus, do you want children?”

“Hermione, I told you last night. I have you, that
is all I need.”

“I want children,” she said sheepishly. Her voice
was so soft that Severus almost didn’t hear her. He wrapped his arms tightly
around her and kissed her head softly.

“Right now, all I want is you. Later we can research
and see how we can fix the damage. I love you, Hermione. You. Not your uterus.
You. I admit that I was excited to think that I could be a father. I never
expected it; it was a very nice idea. We have many avenues if you wish to
venture down them. Wizards can do a lot with magic and potions. We could also
go the muggle route with medicines and surgeries and even adoption.”

Hermione’s jaw dropped. She had never expected
Severus to know anything about muggle fertility options, alo alone adoption.
“How did you kn…?”

Severus cut her off with a quick peck on the lips.
“I do my research too.” She snuggled further into him, keeping herself warm
from the biting wind.

She looked up at him. “Severus, why aren’t you in
classes?”

He smiled, “I had some errands to run that couldn’t
wait.”

“Oh. All right.”

They sat in silence for a few more minutes before
Severus took her hand in his. “Hermione, I want to give you something.” She
turned to face him, she could feel him rustling around next to her. He abruptly
stood up and she heard a distinctive, ‘Dammit,’ whispered under his breath as
he struggled with something.

She giggled softly as she felt him relax somewhat
and sit next to her again. Her hand fit perfectly in his. His calloused fingers
rubbed gently under the back of her hand as he spoke softly. “I wanted to give
you this at Christmas, but I think now is a much better time.” He placed
something small and metal in the palm of her hand and closed her fingers around
it.

Hermione felt the small metal object in her hand and
brought her other hand to feel it. It was round, it was a ring, she could tell.
It had a large stone on one side. It felt beautiful. She wished she could see
it. “Severus, what is this?”

He deadpanned, “It’s a ring Hermione.”

She smacked him lightly and she felt him leave her
side. She could feel his hands holding hers in his. He was kneeling in front of
her. Kneeling?

A soft silky voice could be heard. He only used that
voice for her. That was the voice he read to her with. That was the voice that
could make her orgasm in a matter of seconds. “Hermione?” She held her breath.
There was no way he was doing what she thought he was doing.

“I love you more than anything in this world. You
have given me a purpose to wake up every morning. I want to wake up next to you
every morning for the rest of my life. I know we have only been together a
short time, but I know this is right. Hermione, would you please spend the rest
of your life with me as my wife?” The nerves he felt in his stomach didn’t come
out when he spoke, and for that he was grateful.

Hermione squeezed his hands and let out the breath
she was holding. He still wanted her. He was willing to sacrifice his fathering
a child to be with her. He was willing to use muggle medicine to have a child
if she so desired. She realized that she had been silent for a bit too long and
found that she still could not speak. She raised her hands to his face and
kissed him passionately, giving him her answer without words. After a few
moments they broke away and she smiled, reflecting the smile plastered across
his hard features.

“I take that as a ‘yes.’” She nodded. “I love you,
Hermione,” he whispered in her ear. Her voice was soft, she could barely get it
out, but she returned his endearment wholeheartedly. The two sat together under
the beech tree reveling in their shared love, mentally planning their futures
together, as husband and wife.

A pair of twinkling eyes looked out a window in the
Great Hall and saw the silhouette of the couple embracing by the lake. He
smiled as he took the hand of the woman next to him. “My love, history repeats
itself, once again,” he whispered just before placing a small kiss on her
cheek.