Shiver

I’m in front of Malfoy, and he’s laughing, raping me, hurting me.  My body is paralyzed and I can’t push him away, I can’t run. I can only lay there like a dead animal.  In the background I can see Harry watching me.

‘Shhh, shhh,’

And then I’m back in the room near the fire place, and Katie Finch is trying to stop me from hurting myself because I am screaming and thrashing.

Another nightmare, the second one tonight and one of many over the last few days.

I freeze, and look at Katie before bursting into tears.

She rocks me gently, and I cry until I can’t cry anymore.

She never asks, but any idiot who finds a naked and bruised girl is probably going to draw the right conclusion eventually.  She knows what happened to me.

Gently she lays me down and then stands, looking troubled. 

And it’s back, that feeling of dread and panic.  I don’t want to know what she is thinking but I can’t help but ask, ‘What’s wrong?’

She hesitates, ‘it’s nothing.’

I should let it go, but the annoying, curious part of me that always needs to know can’t stop.  I pull away and sit up, carefully arranging the night shirt she let me borrow and try to appear calm.

I’m not fulling anyone.

‘Well…I didn’t say anything but a couple of days ago we received a notice from the Department of Magical Missing Persons.  It seems a student was reported missing. ‘

I leaned forward, ‘What?’

And my mind is racing as I try to figure out the new game that Malfoy has concocted.  Missing?  Why would he report me missing?

Wouldn’t he be trying to make his escape?  He has no way of knowing if I told.

Katie stands and returns with a piece of parchment.  I all but snatch it from her.  there’s a picture of me, smiling, and a caption beneath it,

                                                                     MISSING

               Miss Granger  regularly takes potions for her health and could be confused, lost, or  untrusting of strangers.  Faculty at Hogwarts School of Witch Craft and Wizardry were attempting to give Ms. Granger medical attention when she fled using floo powder.  She was suffering from multiple injuries at that time and may be confused and suffering from lapses in memory.  Please notify the authorities if you see her.  She may be looking for the Weasley family or her own parents.

My jaw sags open. I can feel my anxiety bubbling up, and the room seems to spin while I try to draw breath.  He wins again. He did it. He did it.

Any person reading this will think I’m crazy. That Malfoy was trying to help me.  Oh my god. Oh my god.

I look wildly at Katie but I can’t hear her. I can’t breathe. I can’t breathe—

The room is closing in, and I feel like I am dying.  Everything is moving slowly.  An eternity seems to pass, and darkness closes in and I know this is it, that I am dead.

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If no one trusts me, that is fine, given my record, but I truly plan to wrap up this story and another this week because there is another story that I have been DYING to write for quite a while, and it is another Lumione story.  Thank you all for your support but more importantly, your patience.  Emphasis on the patience.