Dearest Harry - Eileen's Story

A/N warning what follows in the author's note is a litany of woes!! *deep breath* ........ I sent this story to Kim on Monday, she did not get it till last night, she sent it back, didn't arrive. I have only just got this chapter back right now so I am posting it whilst I can.

The only reason you did not have this chapter last week is becasue my server went down. Next chapter is nearly done. Ditto my other story Concubine ( a new chapter not the story). RL and Internet willing they will be up soon!!

BTW I do have a new beta too as Branny has major life issues right now (hugs you darl) but I have no idea about whether my new beta recieved this or not!!!! So I am posting what i have. Any overlooked mistakes and all. Do not moan if you find small errors, just tell me, I do not mind! Do not complain about my lack of beta support. My Kimmy is wonderful!! ~ You have been warned!!! Any mistakes are Mine! Mine! Mine!!

Chapter Twenty-Seven


It was very early in the morning and Harry was coming back upstairs. He had been unable to sleep, so he had gone to welcome the dawn. Being outside in the morning light helped Harry. It cleared his mind. The swell of sound from birdsong, the dew on the grass, the chill in the air before the sun was really up. Harry loved the mornings. He hadn’t used to, he’d hated them when he lived at the Dursleys. But, even when he had staggered out of his cupboard (long before anyone else was awake, in order to start breakfast), groaning, aching from whatever bruises he had been sporting, even then, he had appreciated the hopefulness of a new day.

He was startled when someone came out of the first floor bathroom. It was Narcissa.

“Good morning, Mr Potter,” she said in aristocratic tones. “You are up and about very early.”

“Um, yeah!” Harry said, and then cringed; he couldn’t think of anything else to say. He was aware that he had a very old pair of jeans on, and a blue Weasley jumper with a hole in the sleeve, and his feet were bare because his trainers had been soaked in the long grass. Molly must not have seen the hole or she would have darned it by now. But he knew that he looked scruffy. God, she must think him such a fool! Why did he seem to be losing the power of speech around her too? He wasn’t normally tongue-tied, he didn’t usually feel like his feet were too big and he never even considered whether or not his neck was clean.

“I owe you a great deal, it seems,” Narcissa said, completely unaware of Harry’s churning thought processes it seemed. “You have kept my son safe and given him somewhere to stay. That means a lot to me, more than you will ever know.”

Harry blushed. He wondered whether she had any idea about just how he had been taking care of her son.

“Would you like to come in for a little while?” she said, indicating the room in which she was staying. “I find myself completely unable to sleep.” Narcissa’s expression seemed infinitely sad. “I slept a lot when I was at the Manor and I have rather a lot to think about at the moment. So I am afraid that insomnia will stalk me for at least a day or so.”

Harry nodded and followed her into her room. “Whose bedroom am I in, Mr Potter?” she asked.

“Um, Mr and Mrs Weasley’s,” Harry said. “They are sleeping on the sofa bed in the sitting room. It likes them and I suppose they wouldn’t have wanted to risk you, as it tends to spit out people it doesn’t like across the room. But Mrs Weasley washed its loose covers last week and so it thinks she is wonderful. Erm, not that it wouldn’t like you as well,” he said hurriedly, worried that she might take offence, “ but er, you never really know, it is quite eccentric!” Narcissa quirked an eyebrow at him and smiled.

“Mr Potter, I did not know that you were so amusing.”

Harry blushed again. He wondered if she were making fun of him, but she seemed to be sincere. She was looking at him steadily and she was still smiling. He looked over at Draco and wondered what would happen between the two of them. Surely Draco wouldn’t want anything to do with Harry now that his mother was back? After all, Harry was a half-blood, and he was a boy. Harry had not forgotten what Draco had told him about magic being more important than gender or even species in the magical world, but he still didn’t quite believe it and he was sure that the aristocratic Narcissa would have other plans for her beloved son.

He watched Draco, who was snuggled up on Narcissa’s bed. He was fast asleep, blond hair falling across his face; long dark lashes curled against his cheek, a small smile curving his lips. And, just for a moment, Harry felt completely desolate, he really didn’t want to lose Draco. He loved him and had done ever since that first kiss. He sighed.

Narcissa was looking at Draco too and her face seemed softer now, her smile had turned tender.

“Poor darling is exhausted,” she said. “He has had such a bad time.”

“Do you know about…erm…?”

“About the fact that Draco is a werewolf? Yes, I do. The Dark Lord saw fit to taunt me with that every day. I was so worried, I thought that he would never find help or support. I was convinced that he would end up in Azkaban. But you helped him, you took him in. I owe you a debt that I can never repay, Mr Potter.”

Harry knew that he was blushing even more deeply now and he could not quite bring himself to look at Draco’s mother.

“S’okay,” he muttered. “Urm... My name is Harry, call me Harry.”

"Narcissa!" she said, gazing at him steadily for a moment.

He truly didn’t know what to do when Narcissa’s face broke into a wide and genuine smile. He never felt as awkward with people as he did with Narcissa right now. He’d only seen her twice before, once at the Quidditch World Cup and once in Madam Malkin’s last year. Both times he had thought her insufferably smug and haughty. But here she was now, being nice to him. Harry didn’t trust her change of heart and he didn’t like to think what she would be like when she found out about him and Draco.

But it seemed that Narcissa was determined to surprise him.

“Draco told me how he feels about you, Harry,” she said. Harry’s heart sank. Well here it was. Draco was still asleep - he had left his mother to tell Harry that Draco didn’t want to be with him any more.

“He loves you Harry, and considering all that you have done for him recently and all that Severus has told me about you, I can see why.”

Harry thought he must look completely stupid. His jaw had dropped, he had not been expecting that particular revelation.

“Severus gave Draco some Dreamless Sleep potion. He has been having such a hard time, and he was so alone until you took him in.” She looked tenderly at her son again, before turning back to Harry. “Severus says that you even protected him from the Minister tonight. Scrimgeour hates Death Eaters, and maybe he has reason.” She shrugged sadly.

“It’s my fault, you realise? Mine and Lucius’ and Bella’s and all us other poor fools who followed a man because he was good looking and charming and seemed to say all the right things. But look where it got us. My sister is dead and it is a good thing that she is because she was completely mad before the end. Lucius,” her voice broke when she said her husband’s name and her face crumpled then she whispered, “Lucius has gone too.

“Everything is ruined. Draco and I have nothing because Death Eaters occupy our home and all of it, all of it is my fault. So I probably deserve it.

“But Draco, he didn’t ask for any of this. You two should be still at school fighting during potions and trying to work out how to get out of transfiguration homework.”

She had sat on the bed and was looking sadly down at the floor.

Harry reached over and sort of patted her on the back. He was so not good at this comforting thing, he thought, and yet he seemed to be in the habit of comforting distressed Malfoys at the moment. He didn’t think that transforming into a lion was going to help Narcissa, though.

“Er, would you like a cup of tea?” he said.

So Harry made tea and they talked for a while and Narcissa told Harry about her childhood and her friendships and the sadness she felt about the fact that most of her friends were lost. She talked about Bellatrix when she was a little girl who loved to look after her pet kneazles, and she talked about Andromeda and Regulus, Sirius’ younger brother and she talked about Sirius too.

“Andromeda was so much older than us and when she ran away with her beloved Ted Tonks, my mother never forgave her. She had a brightness about her, Andy did,” Narcissa said with her eyes staring ahead of her, fixed on some point in the past. “My parents loved her best and it broke their hearts when she left. Bella was fourteen, not a good age to lose your best friend, and I was eleven. That was the year that Sirius was sorted into Gryffindor and his parents never forgave him that any more than my parents forgave Andy. I just went along with all that pureblood nonsense! Weakly.”

“I’m a half blood,” Harry said baldly. “You do know that, don’t you? And erm, I really like your son.”

“Harry,” Narcissa said with a slight smile curving her lips again, “I do know who your parents were. But, as a matter of fact, you are not a half blood; your mother was, not you. Severus told me many things tonight and he told me of your relationship too. But my priorities have changed Harry, I have lost just about everything I cared about and I wouldn’t care if you were Muggle born anymore. It doesn’t seem to matter now.”

Her face crumpled again and Harry thought she was going to cry, so he blurted out a thought that had been niggling at him.

“Mrs Malfoy, why did Voldemort not hurt you, why did he keep you alive?”

She looked up at him, puzzled her grey eyes, so like Draco’s, were swimming with tears.

“Because of the wards,” she said. “The Dark Lord couldn’t kill me because he needed me. In an old house like Malfoy Manor, one has to be keyed into the wards by blood or by bonding.”

“Then maybe Mr Malfoy is safe,” Harry said. “Did you actually see him die?”

Narcissa was staring him, mutely she shook her head.

“Then maybe they didn’t kill him, because if they want to stay at the Manor, then they need him for the wards.”

Narcissa was still staring at him, but this time her expression had changed. Her eyes were still damp but now they were filled with an expression that Harry had not seen there in the two hours that they had been talking. They were filled with hope.


Much, much later Harry asked Severus what he thought. He had left Narcissa after the realisation that they had had about Lucius, gone back to his own room, had a shower and then headed back downstairs to make breakfast. When Severus walked in, Harry was making drop scones to go with the pile of bacon that he had just cooked. Molly had joined him and was making tea and toast and Eileen was just sitting at the table watching her grandson with a quiet pride in her expression.

“When did you learn to cook, Harry?” she said her chin cupped in her hand.

Harry flushed, he didn’t know what to say. He didn’t like to talk about the Dursleys anymore, but he didn’t want to lie to his grandmother.

“Erm, Aunt Petunia taught me. I always used to make breakfast,” he said, and then because he couldn’t seem to stop himself, continuing. “She taught me just after I started school, so that I would be more useful.”

“But surely you never got the chance to practice if you were at Hogwarts?” Molly said curiously.

Harry’s stomach twisted, why on earth had he mentioned it? Why had that bit of info slipped out? But he had to tell it all now, didn’t he?

“Not Hogwarts, Mrs Weasley, primary school.”

Harry actually flinched when she gasped.

Eileen got up from the table and came over to him. “You have had a hard time, haven’t you, love?” she said and then she pulled his head down to her level and placed a kiss on his forehead. Next thing he knew she was giving him a hug and the tight pain that had formed in his chest slowly dissolved. Then she didn’t mention it again.

She didn’t ask him if he wanted to talk about it, or start ranting about the Dursleys, she simply held him close and made him feel loved.

Then other people joined them in the kitchen and everyone was talking about the events of the night before and Harry hugged his gran back and got on with cooking the bacon.


Severus thought that Harry could be right. Lucius was almost certainly alive, because he would indeed be useful to the Dark Lord, especially if he wanted to stay in Malfoy Manor. He doubted very much that even a fairly prolonged spell under Cruciatus would have killed Lucius. But who knew what state the man would be in? Look what had happened to the Longbottoms.

But he couldn’t bring himself to mention that. Not after he saw how much lighter Narcissa looked this morning and (he told himself) Lucius had always been very strong. No, Harry was right, there was a very good chance that the senior Malfoy was still alive, although right now he didn’t think there was a single thing they could do to help him.

After breakfast, Harry had taken him aside to ask his question and Severus had felt almost overwhelmed. Harry had turned to him? He’d trusted his judgement and deliberately sought him out and Severus felt warmed.

Whilst he and Harry had their discussion, the other children cleared up the kitchen. Draco was babbling away to his mother about what had happened since they had been apart. All at once, the boy seemed absurdly young. He had obviously been keeping a tight rein on his emotions since Severus had rescued him. But now he seemed happier, more relaxed than any time Severus could remember in the last few years. He was as relaxed and garrulous as the child Severus remembered from before Hogwarts. Before Draco had changed so much and become almost insufferable at times.

He was proudly demonstrating the household charms that Eileen had taught him and
Narcissa looked completely bemused. As well she might, Severus told himself. Since when had a Malfoy been proud of being good at housework?

Once the kitchen was tidy and everyone had arrived, Severus called a meeting. Everyone was expected to attend, except for Ginny and Narcissa.

Eileen had been polite to the woman, even respectful, but she had told Narcissa that they had things to discuss and that they would call her down later. Narcissa had nodded gracefully and retreated upstairs.

Ginny had stomped and fumed and shouted at her mother, but Molly wasn’t budging. She obviously did not like her other children attending meetings either, but Ron was of age, Bill was invaluable and the twins had always done whatever they wanted to do without recourse to anyone.

Draco, though, was furious. When Narcissa had been asked to leave, he had paled and his lips had thinned. He was already sitting down just one seat away from Harry and as far from Bill as he could manage. Bill’s once handsome face was still ravaged from Greyback’s attack and Draco dealt with the man’s disfigurement by avoiding him. They had tried everything to heal the scars, but nothing had worked so far. But Severus had prepared a jar of salve which he planned to give Bill at the end of the meeting, the new salve that he and Eileen had created - the one with the secret ingredient.

Everyone was seated now, except for him. The only seat left was at the head of the table, Dumbledore’s seat. Severus looked at it, confused. Eileen spoke.

“Come on Severus, love. Don’t keep us waiting all day.”

Severus felt distinctly uncertain.

“Please, Professor,” Bill said, “we want you to sit there, to chair the meeting.” Severus was completely astonished. He had never, in his whole life, been accepted by anyone, or even liked very much. He wondered if these people realised what an honour they were giving him. But as he looked at them, one by one, he saw that they did. He swallowed the lump in his throat that was threatening to choke him and moved forward to take the seat that he had been offered.