The Ties that Lead to Trust

Chapter 27~Misunderstandings and Memories
Hermione shuffled through her weekend homework for a couple hours before noticing it was well past her habitual time to leave for the library. She didn’t want to face the school today, but she knew the time would come and if she wanted to spend a few minutes in Gryffindor tower before she was permanently banished it would have to be before Dumbledore arrived to help her with her rooms. Staring off into space she considered what she wanted to do about them. An amusing idea of relocating them to the hallway across from the library made her smile, but she dismissed it. Harry and Ron- no just Harry- would never let her live it down. For a moment she wondered if something similar would have happened if she and Ron had been married and attending school. It was entirely possible they both would have been denied access to Gryffindor tower and they likely would have argued extensively over where to have rooms if they were given the choice at all. Hermione snorted with mirth at the thought.

Severus, who was sitting in his old chair reading, looked up at her. “I can’t for the life of me see what is so amusing about Arithmancy homework. Care to enlighten me?’

She felt her humour dampened with the prospect of sharing it and sighed sadly. “Just thinking about what Ron would have said about where I might want to put my rooms. I’ll admit to considering a location close to the library, but not very seriously. I’m sure he would have thought something in the hallway by the kitchens to be far more advantageous.”

He moved from his chair and sat on the sofa beside her. “Do you think about him often?”

She nodded. “I can’t help it sometimes. I’ll hear something interesting or funny and think that Ron would like to hear that. It happened more often at the beginning of last term, but I thought about him complaining about me spending so much time in the library and couldn’t help but see his exasperated expression.”

“At least one always knows where to find you,” he said giving her a strained smile. “So you are going to move your rooms near the library? I don’t suppose I’m particularly surprised by that.”

Hermione shook her head. “I’m not. It was an amusing thought, but I have other ideas.”

“You could stay here,” he suggested.

Standing up, Hermione looked at the familiar bookshelves filled with his collection, the worn leather chair he had been sitting in, and his favourite painting above the mantle then slowly around to the elegant dining room with the charmed window. The light from it shone off the polished finish of his table and she gazed at the reflection for uncounted moments. Without really thinking she spoke to herself, “There’s just no place for me here.”

Her trance was broken by Severus standing abruptly, stiff in his manner and speaking with clipped, cold words. “I see. Clearly the convenience you wanted is no longer here. I suggest you leave now if that is how you feel.”

With that he swept his robes around him and strode out of the sitting room without a backwards glance, closing the door to the back rooms with a sharp snap that seemed to echo through the room. Hermione stood stunned for a moment then called out, “No! That’s not what I mean. It’s just that-”

But her words were stopped by the muted sound of another door angrily snapping shut. Uncertain of what to do she crammed her books into her school bag and ran from his rooms all the way up to her own and fell onto her bed crying. She hadn’t meant to say something that would upset him, but clearly she had. All she meant by her comment was that his rooms were all his. They were nice and she liked spending time there, but they were still his and she needed space of her own. He could always go to his office or private lab to have time and space to himself, but needed that as well.
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After crying until she was spent, she stood and began pacing her rooms. She was angry he hadn’t bothered to wait for her to clarify what she had said. He had leapt to conclusions and stormed off without pausing to think. Pounding her fist against the wall she shouted to her empty rooms, “You didn’t even listen to me!”

A small voice came from outside her door. “Hermione? Will you let me listen?”

Drawing in a deep breath, she opened the door and saw Ginny looking back at her with a terribly nervous expression. “You alright?”

“Not especially. Come in,” Hermione said weakly, ushering in the red headed girl.

Sitting down on opposite chairs, Ginny looked at her for a long time before speaking. “What happened? Did the Ministry make you quit school? Did they fire Professor Snape? Is Malfoy in trouble?”

She shook her head. “I didn’t even see the Ministry officials. They met with Professor Dumbledore last night and he worked everything out. I’m out of Potions class and Gryffindor house, but I’m still in all my other classes and I’m still Head Girl.”

Ginny’s eyebrows shot up. “Out of Gryffindor house? That’s mad! They can’t do that?”

“They can and they did. I don’t have a house anymore and Dumbledore is helping me move my rooms this afternoon.”

“To where?”

Hermione bowed her head in defeat. “I don’t know, anymore.”

“Why don’t you just move in with Snape?” Ginny suggested innocently.

“Don’t you start in on me too!” Hermione snapped angrily.

Ginny’s eyes widened and she tried to speak calmly. “Hold on a moment. I’m not starting into anything. Did something happen with Snape?”

Hermione started sniffling again. “I said something and he got angry and told me to leave.”

“You had a fight,” the younger girl stated simply.

“No. He just- well perhaps, but- it wasn’t much of one and it was for a stupid reason,” Hermione admitted.

“Which was?”

“He suggested I stay in his rooms and I looked around and noticed there was no place for me there. I didn’t realize I had spoken out loud.”

Ginny let out a low whistle. “Wow. I imagine that went over as well as doxies let loose at a dinner party. No wonder he’s hacked off.”

Hermione groaned, “But I didn’t mean it that way. I only meant that they were his rooms and his space and I still need my own.”

“What did he say?” she prodded.

“He snapped back at me saying that I was walking out because it was no longer convenient and then he stormed out of the room so quickly I didn’t get the chance to explain what I meant. I feel terrible,” Hermione said, hugging her arms around herself.

Ginny shook her head. “You feel wretched because you have been crying so much. Where were you going to move your rooms if you weren’t going to move in with him anyway?”


“I was going to move them to the main floor above his and see if I could get the staircase to go down instead of up. I wanted to try to put a doorway into the space between the warded main entrance and his private entrance so that they were attached but still separate. So I could have my own space. I don’t suppose I will be doing that now,” she answered sadly.

“It’s just a fight and it won’t last forever. You and Ron used to fight all the time,” Ginny joked.

“Ginny-”

“Well perhaps it isn’t the same as that, but it’s still only a fight. Mum and Dad have them too.”

Hermione sighed deeply. “Your parents are very different from Severus and myself. You can’t compare the two.”

Ginny shrugged. “Perhaps not, but I’m sure once he has a chance to calm down he will realize what you meant, or at least that there was more to the comment than what he heard. Your plan for moving your rooms is good. It will work very well when he takes the time to listen to you. There is probably a good reason he was particularly hurt by what you said or he wouldn’t have stormed off. Snape doesn’t seem the type to avoid confrontation.”

“I wouldn’t say that. He abhors people shouting in close quarters. I know it reminds him of... I shouldn’t say anything about it. He would hate me for telling you,” Hermione ended weakly.

“You don’t have to,” she said, taking her friend’s hand and asking gently, “Was there anything else that the Ministry felt the need to do to you?”

Hermione shook her head. “No, that’s everything Dumbledore told me this morning. I’m an ‘adult’ student now so a bunch of new regulations apply to me, but other than that all I have to face is the gossip and speculation flying around the school.”

“Well, if it’s about gossip, Harry is more experienced than I when it comes to dealing with it. Can you still come up to the tower before lunch? You have to spend a little time there before they make you leave,” Ginny insisted.

The older girl chuckled. “The Ministry and wild dragons couldn’t stop me. Is Harry waiting for us?”

Ginny nodded. “I think he was working on some project when I left. I could almost have mistaken him for you since there was a mountain of books surrounding him.”

“He’s really working on schoolwork?! May miracles never cease,” Hermione said, incredulous.

Chuckling Ginny agreed. “I was shocked too. You ready?”

“As I’ll ever be. Let’s go,” she answered as they climbed up her back stairs into the common room above.
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Up in the Gryffindor common room, many people were curious to hear the real story of what had happened with Draco Malfoy and Professor Snape since Harry had been tight lipped about the whole thing. Most of the sixth and seventh years leaned in to hear Hermione’s terse explanation. “I turned eighteen during my sixth year, not my seventh. Since I’m muggleborn, the Ministry forced that stupid marriage act on me. Yes I married Professor Snape, but it was to get out of marrying Malfoy. Really, it’s a long story and I don’t want to get into it all. The long and the short of it is, that I can’t be in Potions class anymore and I’m not allowed in here either.”

Lavender’s expression was more than shocked. “I can’t believe it! Didn’t the Ministry know you still had school left?”

“Of course they did,” Harry snapped from behind a stack of books, “but Lucius Malfoy has some friends in the Marriage division and wants to make Hermione’s life miserable.”

“Why Snape?” asked Parvati. “Didn’t you get to choose?”

Hermione sighed deeply. “I don’t want to talk about it. Yes I got to choose, but why I chose Snape is a long story.”

The room was abuzz with talk ranging from angry comments directed at the Ministry to mumbled words of pity to Hermione for the situation she was in. Trying to forget she was the centre of attention, she looked around the common room trying to memorize everything about it. She had anticipated feeling sad when she left the tower in June, but now it was happening so suddenly. Neville nervously sat beside her and whispered, “You should have let me know. Gran would have let me help you...”

She gave him a warm smile. “It’s not as simple as that, but I appreciate the sentiment. It’s better this way.”

Ginny had cornered Colin Creevey and he brought an envelope to Hermione with excitement written on his face. “I developed these over the holidays. They’re from the party. The Whizbangs came out really well, but it’s too bad they’re in black and white. I hope you like them.”

Students began filtering out of the room for lunch in the Great Hall, but Hermione stayed in her favourite chair by the fire leafing through the photos. Harry was sorting through the pile of books around him mumbling about some parchment with notes he had lost while Ginny continued to chat with Colin, holding a parchment with familiar messy handwriting on it. When it became clear that Hermione did not want to answer any more questions, everyone left her alone. Each picture she looked at was filled with smiling faces and antics in the common room. Looking back, she wished she had known it would be the last time she had to celebrate in the tower. Perhaps she wouldn’t have worried so much about the noise and silliness. After all, it was only a bit of fun.

When she looked up, she saw Neville crawling through the portrait hole and noticed him smile at her. She smiled back and thought about what she had said to him. ‘It’s better this way.’ Was it really? She was miserable now, but continually told herself that things were for the best. Perhaps she was wrong.

Harry gave up on searching and looked up at the clock on the mantle which had one hand pointing to ‘lunch time’ and the other pointing to ‘late.’ “I hate to say this, but we are late for lunch. We had better go.”

“I know. You’re right,” she said heavily. “Did you find what you were looking for?”

“No. I spent all last night going through these books and taking notes and I can’t find my work anywhere!” Harry said with mounting frustration.

Hermione took a closer look at his stack of books and noticed the titles Eggs, Feathers and Flight: the wonders of our avian friends, Up in Smoke: a guide to Phoenix rearing and Fire Burn and Cauldron Bubble: Rare ingredients and their uses. “Since when does Hagrid assign homework?”

“This isn’t for Hagrid’s class, it’s for Potions,” Harry informed her.

Her eyes widened in surprise. “You only got the assignment yesterday. I can hardly believe you have already done work on it.”

Harry shrugged his shoulders. “Madam Pince helped us in the library and I found something I wanted to do right away. Where are my notes?”

Ginny’s eyes danced as she slipped the paper she had been holding into one of the books he had already searched through. “Don’t worry about it now. We’re late. Let’s go.”

Taking one last look around, Hermione walked towards the portrait hole and out of Gryffindor tower. When the portrait of the Fat Lady closed, she looked at her for a long moment then followed Harry and Ginny down to the Great Hall.
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He was wrong. He knew it. He knew very well that he was wrong, but it irked him to admit it. After leaving his rooms and pacing in his private lab for a half hour to release his agitation, Severus didn’t feel much better, but he was able to recognize that he had overreacted. Despite what she had said, Hermione was not callous by nature and had likely spoken without organizing her words. He should know enough about cruel and biting comments by now to recognise that these were not, but in all honesty they rankled.

Now, sitting at the head table in the Great Hall, he didn’t pay any mind to the murmur of gossip travelling along the tables. He wasn’t even trying to feign an interest in whatever Flitwick was saying to him in a very one sided conversation. Looking out across the expansive room, he focussed on the Gryffindor table. Most sixth and seventh year students were clustered close to Hermione, obviously in a show of support. Closest to her were Potter, the youngest Weasley and, to his surprise, Neville Longbottom. The boy’s expression was stern, far more serious than he had seen before, as if he was her personal bodyguard. A surge of irritation ran through him, but it was quickly followed by a wave of guilt when Hermione turned to someone further up the table and he saw her face.

She wasn’t looking at him, but he could see her well enough to notice the wet brightness of her eyes and the ruddy tinge to her cheeks and lips. She had been crying. The whole of Hogwarts could see that, particularly as everyone was watching her intently. Turning back to his meal, he endeavoured to ignore everyone else in the room. Down the table, Albus stood, shuffled past the other staff and said quietly, “This too will pass.”

Severus glanced back out of reflex to see the back of the headmaster’s blue velvet robed figure disappear out the side door. Grumbling inwardly about unsolicited advice, he looked disgustedly at his now stone cold chicken stew and pushed away from the table. Leaving out the other side door, he stormed down the hallways to be miserable in the privacy of his own rooms.
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That night, Hermione tossed and turned, unable to fall asleep. When she closed her eyes she saw Severus’ angry face and heard him tell her to leave. Resigning herself to a night without rest, she took out one of her old books and began flipping through the pages, not really reading.

Dumbledore had met her after lunch as promised and without too much effort they had been able to move her rooms in between a couple empty classrooms on the main floor. She had taken Ginny’s advice and stayed with her original plan to rearrange the stairs down to the dungeons inside the warded entrance to Severus’ rooms. It was a bit difficult to manage, but the Headmaster didn’t question her suggestion, though it was obvious he was aware of their row.

Though she was still angry with Severus, Hermione felt herself drawn to his rooms but she dismissed it as simply being aware of how close he was. Frustrated and tired, she tossed her book aside and tried once more to fall asleep.

Hermione shivered when she felt something cold against her hand. She groaned at the intrusion to her rest because she had finally been able to drift off. Still exhausted and half asleep she noticed her whole body was cold and cracked an eye open. Crookshanks was up on his hind paws nudging her to wake up. Sitting up, she noticed the lack of blankets had made her cold, but she jolted awake when she realized where she was.

The normally cool leather of Severus’ sofa beneath her was warm from her body and the fire which usually crackled brightly was dampened for the night. It was still very dark in the room, but the glow from the coals illuminated the mantle clock and she saw it was nearly seven o’clock. The gap beneath the door to the dining room was bright with the grey light of dawn and somewhere she heard someone moving. Hermione had no recollection of coming down in the night, though she knew she was not a sleepwalker. Horrified by the prospect of another confrontation, she was galvanized into motion by the muffled sounds in the back hall. Dashing out of the room and up the staircase to her own she collapsed in a chair, breathing heavily trying to recover from the shock of her nighttime wanderings.
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