Dolasitas

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Whilst all of this had been happening, Lexy had been safely holed up in the bowels of the castle, in the Snapes’ apartments. When Lucius had left the room, she turned to Severus and smiled at him. “Could I have a cuddle, please?” she asked, looking longingly at Casper.

Severus nodded and rose, allowing her to sit in the chair before he handed Casper over, who didn’t even stir before settling into his godmother’s arms. Severus observed them silently for a few minutes before speaking. “I have no doubt that you will make an excellent mother when your little one arrives, Alexis,” he said soberly.

“Thank you, sir,” she replied, touched to receive a rare compliment from her former professor.

“There really is no need to call me sir, now, Alexis, when I am no longer teaching you. Severus is perfectly acceptable,” he rebuked her.

Lexy blushed and nodded. “Sir…Severus… how did you adjust to being a parent?” she blurted.

Severus was taken aback by her question. Frowning, he thought of how best to answer. “I would not say I have completely adjusted, to be perfectly honest. Ginevra does most of the work for Casper, and I admire her greatly for that. With the time I spend teaching and preparing lessons, I do not get to spend as much time with them as I would like.”

To his very great alarm, a small tear leaked out of the corner of her eye, and was swiftly joined by more. “I was afraid that you would say that,” Lexy sniffled miserably.

“You are not afraid of being unable to bond with your child, surely?” he asked warily. Crying women had always been something he greatly disliked, but Severus knew that he could not ignore her distress. “After all, you have practically been a mother to your brother for nearly a year now.”

“No, not me,” she explained, blinking furiously as she tried to squeeze back the tears. “It’s Lucius that I am worried about. He had such a terrible relationship with Draco, and what if the same thing happens with this baby? I can’t look after a baby by myself; I’ve no idea what to do!” Lexy’s breaths were coming faster, and it was obvious to Severus how terrified she was.

Still, though, he hesitated before answering. He had no desire to lie to her, but to tell her the truth would only make her fears worse. “Alexis, I have known Lucius for nearly thirty years now. A year ago, I would have said without a shadow of a doubt that he was entirely incapable of love.” Lexy stared up at him, her eyes wide and willing him to continue. He sighed deeply. “Has Lucius ever explained to you his relationship with Draco?”

Lexy shook her head. “No. He told me a little of his past, but he seems to get so angry every time Draco is mentioned.”

Severus nodded. “Lucius deeply resented having to get married, and to Narcissa in particular. He detested her, and with good reason, for she was a vapid bitch, if you will excuse my language.” Lexy giggled, and then looked anxiously at Will, who was happily pre-occupied with his teddy, and seemed not to have heard.

“But no matter what he thought of her, Draco was still his son, though,” she pressed him.

“He never wanted him. They had a child because they were obligated to, to fulfil the marriage contract drawn up by their families, and once Draco was conceived Narcissa refused any sexual contact with him. As you will no doubt have noted,” Severus commented wryly, “Lucius has an extraordinarily high sexual drive, and this was yet another reason for him to resent Draco. Even worse, once he was a few years old and his personality began to develop, it became clear that he had inherited all of his mother’s faults. Narcissa was lonely in the manor having pushed Lucius away, and she smothered Draco. Lucius was rarely home – before the Dark Lord’s absence, he was constantly at the revels, and afterwards he would take any excuse to be away. Finally, of course, Draco grew into his own person and made the ultimate betrayal of his father and everything he stood for.

“Lucius came to me on the day that he discovered Draco’s defection, and I have never seen someone as bitter as he seemed to me that day. He declared to me then and there that he would never allow anyone else to get close to him ever again, and there was not a hope in hell that he would ever again have children, as all they were was a bitter disappointment.”

“Then I am right. He doesn’t want this child; it is only to please the Dark Lord,” Lexy murmured, her face downcast.

“Not at all, Alexis,” he replied anxiously. “I am telling you this to demonstrate the change in him since he met you. You make him smile and laugh, and that is incredible in itself. Since his father’s death, the only times I ever saw him smile were when he was making somebody else suffer, be that pain, rape or worse. Now, it is a regular occurrence. After all that he has been through, that is miraculous.

“Ginevra tells me that he says he loves you. Whilst I still maintain that he likely does not know what love is, I recognise that you and the child you are having together are the most important things in his life. Do you realise how dangerous it was for him to open himself up to you in that way? If the Dark Lord realised how deeply he cared for you, it would not be inconceivable for him to take you away just to punish him. Lucius has taken a great risk for you, Alexis. Do not do him the disservice of failing to recognise the strength of his feelings for you.”

Lexy was overwhelmed by what Severus had disclosed to her. She had never thought of his past in that way at all, and she was startled to find how little she knew of the man she had married. But Severus had not finished with his revelations. “You need to be careful,” he said abruptly.

“Me?” she responded with surprise.

“Falling in love with him would only complicate matters. You are not as adept as he and I are at hiding our emotions, and if the Dark Lord were to find out how much has developed between the two of you, it would place you both in danger, and I would hate for harm to befall either of you.”

“I…I never said I loved him,” was all the response that Lexy could manage, but to her surprise and fear she found that the denial she had become so used to issuing over the past year no longer had the conviction it once had. Shocked, she turned to Severus. “And how about you?”

“What about me?” he snapped sharply.

“Do you love Ginny and Casper?” Lexy demanded pointedly.

Unnoticed by either of them, Ginny had been awake for the past few minutes, and had been hidden behind the door listening to their conversation with growing astonishment. Lexy’s question, however, had elicited a small gasp from her mouth as she saw her husband stood there apparently unable to answer.

Severus’ head snapped towards the door, but he was prevented from moving towards it from sounds of screaming up above.

Lexy jumped up, putting Casper in the Moses basket in the corner of the room. “Severus, what’s happening?” she shouted, her hands shaking with fear.

“I will go and find out,” Severus replied tersely. “Ginevra!” he called loudly.

Ginny instantly emerged. “Yes?”

“Stay with Lexy and the children, and in Merlin’s name do not leave this room.”

“I don’t think so!” Lexy retorted furiously. “I’m coming with you! That’s my husband up there, and I will NOT sit here and be treated like a child whilst he might be in danger.”

“I am not treating you like a child, I am treating you like the pregnant woman that you are. Now, will you stay or will I have to force you to stay?” Severus responded tersely. Lexy opened her mouth to reply, but realised that she was fighting a losing battle and slumped to the floor, pulling Will into her arms. “Thank you.” Severus turned to Ginny, paused before shrugging his shoulders and sweeping out of the room.

Lexy turned her terrified eyes up towards her best friend. She found herself unable to speak, but her face expressed her fear for her. “What’s going on, Lexy?” Ginny asked, her face pale as she crossed the room and gathered her baby into her arms.

“I don’t know, but Lucius is up there,” Lexy replied brokenly. “He said he had a task to do for You-Know-Who, and that I was to stay here because he didn’t want to leave me alone in the manor whilst he was busy.”

“Yes, Remus dropped in yesterday evening and told us what had happened. How did they end up taking you as well? The plan had been to take only the Volkarovs as soon as they left the manor.”

“I seized Valentina’s hand to pull her away from the middle of the fight, and Rodolphus did the same to me, which is how he ended up coming along too,” Lexy explained. “I was glad to have the company, but it was horrendous to be away from Lucius for so long, especially at the moment.”

Ginny was determined to keep Lexy talking and distracted from whatever might be happening above them. It would do her and the baby no good to worry. “Do the rest of the Order know about the baby now then, Lexy? It must have been difficult to hide it.”

Lexy nodded. “Yes, Draco, of all people, came into to the room just as my daily bout of morning sickness made its visit,” she said regretfully. “I don’t think he was too impressed that I hadn’t told them, to be honest.”

“I’m sure they will understand. It’s only natural to want to keep it to yourselves until you know for sure that everything will be alright, after all,” Ginny responded, smiling down at Casper as he blinked up at her. “We didn’t announce it until twelve weeks either, and you’re only about nine weeks now, aren’t you?”

Before Lexy could reply, Severus threw the door open and burst back into the room, closely followed by Remus Lupin. “I don’t believe it…” he said hoarsely.

“What’s happened?” Lexy asked frantically, pushing Will off her lap and awkwardly rising, now standing face to face with Remus. “Is Lucius alright?”

“Lucius seems to have fled the castle – we presume that he’s been summoned, as we’ve just been called to Riddle Manor,” Remus replied grimly.

Ginny was not listening to his reply; instead, her attention was fixed on her husband, who was clearly deeply shocked. “What’s happened, Severus?” she asked gently.

“They’ve killed McGonagall,” he said bluntly, his eyes dazed. “I never thought they would stoop so low…” Both of the women gasped out loud, their mouths agape.

Remus’ hands were shaking as he moved towards the fireplace. “There is nothing we can do here, Severus, and the Dark Lord will be furious if we keep him waiting.”

“Yes, you are quite correct,” Severus muttered, shaking his head as Remus threw a handful of Floo powder into the flames.

“Ginny, Lexy, stay here no matter what,” Remus requested soberly. “The castle is in chaos, and it would do neither of you any good to be in the midst of it. We will be back as soon as we can.” Severus nodded as he pointed his wand at the door, locking it with a resounding click. “Riddle Manor!” Remus called as he stepped into the flames, Severus following as soon as he had disappeared.

Remus and Severus moved through the manor following the sounds of tortured screams, exchanging a worried glance before entering the parlour, their eyes downcast as they waited for permission to move forward. Voldemort lifted the curse from his unfortunate victim on the floor to beckon them forward, and the man attempted to crawl away.

They quickly looked around the room and saw that as well as the dozen or so Inner Circle members standing against the walls, Lucius Malfoy was collapsed in the far corner of the room. They realised that the man who was now the target of Voldemort’s fury was Avery.

Voldemort stared at them, his red eyes flashing and his mouth a thin slit of fury. “Do you have a valid reason for your delay?!” he demanded of them.

“My lord,” Severus replied hurriedly, “there was a problem at Hogwarts which prevented us from leaving as soon as we felt your summons. The headmistress was found dead in her office.” As he was speaking, Remus noticed and recognised the book that was lying on the table behind Voldemort, and his eyebrows shot up as the events of the past thirty minutes fell into place.

“Yes, I was rather hoping that Lucius and Caius could explain that to me,” Voldemort said coldly, his wand still directed at the quaking Avery.

Lucius spoke up first, blood trickling down his face from a gash over his eye, but his expression still proud and haughty. “My lord, I became suspicious after McGonagall handed the book over so easily, and I opened it before we left the room. As it appears to you now, it appeared blank in the room and it became obvious to me that there were secrets that she needed some more… persuasion… to divulge. I permitted Avery to continue with the method that we had agreed upon beforehand in an attempt to persuade her to tell us what we needed to know.”

Lucius’ upper lip curled with disgust as he glared in Avery’s direction. “Unfortunately, he could not retain a grip upon his temper, and when McGonagall attempted to prevent him from doing so, he cast the Avada Kedavra upon her before I could prevent him.”

“Is this true, Avery?” Voldemort enquired icily. The wretched man nodded and whimpered, opening his mouth to plead his case, but he did not get the opportunity to do so. “Avada Kedavra!” Voldemort hissed, the green jet of light striking Avery directly in the chest.

Lucius inhaled deeply, greatly relieved, and began to rise to his feet. “My lord, I crave your pardon for my failure to prevent this afternoon’s unfortunate events,” he began confidently.

“You let me down today, Lucius, and I will not tolerate that. Crucio!” Lucius collapsed back onto the floor under the intensity of the curse, and by the time it was lifted he was barely conscious.

Voldemort turned his attention from him to Remus and Severus. “I am relying upon the two of you to devise the workings of this book. There must be some record at Hogwarts of how to read it, and I need to know. Contact me if there is anything you need.” They nodded, and he turned his attention to Rodolphus Lestrange, who was standing near Lucius, anxiously watching his friend. “Rodolphus, take Lucius back to Malfoy Manor. I will be in touch tomorrow to discuss our next steps. You are all dismissed,” he finished, gesturing towards the door as he sat down.

The two men watched as Rodolphus supported an ashen Lucius as they left the room, and then followed them out, joining the queue at the fireplace. Neither man had yet been able to decide what to say to the other about their feelings and thoughts on what had just happened, and as a result both stayed silent. Both had doubts about where the other’s loyalties truly lay.

When they Flooed back to Hogwarts, Lexy ran at him the instant they stepped out of the fireplace. “Where is he?!” she begged Remus, her eyes frantic.

“Rodolphus has taken him back to the manor,” Remus revealed tiredly.

Foregoing further discussion, Lexy snatched Will up from the floor and Flooed home, leaving an awkward silence behind her. Remus was staring into the fireplace after her, his expression unreadable and his fists hanging clenched at his side, and Severus was finding it difficult to meet his wife’s eyes. Finally, Remus moved towards the door. “I will organise a staff meeting for an hour’s time, if you have no objection, Severus,” he muttered, pausing at the edge of the room.

Severus nodded curtly. “I will be there.”

As Remus pulled the door closed behind him, Severus made to leave the room, but Ginny impulsively crossed the room and seized his arm. “What would you have said, Severus?” she asked of him, only her eyes betraying how desperately she wanted to know.

“About what?” he said cautiously.

“For Merlin’s sake, you know I overheard yours and Lexy’s conversation earlier. You were about to answer her question, and I need to know what you were going to say.”

“Does it matter so much to you?”

She did not reply, and he tried to shrug her hand off his arm, before he caught her whispered response. “More than it should, Severus. More than it should.”

Severus grimaced. “Love was never a part of this arrangement, Ginevra.” Ginny sighed loudly and turned away from him, her lower lip trembling. “Do you… do you have feelings for me?” he blurted out, astonished to hear the words spilling forth from his lips.

Ginny spun back around, opening and closing her mouth as if unable to reply. Trembling, she finally managed to speak. “Does it matter?” she asked bitterly. “As you were so quick to remind me, our marriage is merely a ‘mutually beneficial arrangement’, Severus.” She left the room with Casper in her arms, and Severus slammed the door behind him as he stormed out of their apartment, not knowing how or why her words had wounded him so.

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