A Reason To Be

Draco woke up before dawn the next morning. He really didn’t wake up; he hadn’t slept the night before. He looked out the window and could still see the moon, low in the morning sky. Then he decided it was time. He threw the covers off and put his feet down on the cold, stone floor. After he came out of his bathroom, he rummaged through his drawers and wardrobe until he found a comfortable pair of black pants and a soft, long-sleeved shirt of the same color. He pulled his clothes on and gave his bed hair one good ruffle with his hand. He yawned and padded barefoot to the door of his bedroom and out into the hallway.

“Monsieur Malfoy bonjour. Vous êtes vers le haut premier aujourd\'hui.”* Antoinette greeted him cheerily when he noticed him there. Draco smiled and raised his tired arm up in greeting.

“Oui, j\'ai quelques choses que je dois faire avant que chacun obtienne mobile ce matin.”** Draco replied softly. He wasn’t going to disclose exactly what he was up to this morning, but it was true that he definitely wanted to do it before the majority of the school woke up. He looked up at the young dancer, who was smiling sweetly at him.

“Ayez un jour plaisant Draco. Je vous verrai plus tard.”*** Antoinette said kindly before returning to her dancing. Draco paused for a moment.

‘You may not.’ Draco thought as he nodded his head to her and turned to walk away.

“Merci Antoinette. Au revoir.”**** Draco said quietly as he left. He walked slowly down the corridor and the stairs. No one was up yet, he was completely alone as he walked the cold halls. He made it to the hospital wing without an upward glance. His feet knew the way and carried him there while his head was elsewhere.

‘This will work, it has to. I pray to any power that would listen to someone like me, please let this work. Please let me help her.’ Draco prayed silently. He looked up and found he had reached his destination. The door creaked as he pushed it opened and walked in. He walked over to Hermione’s bedside table and opened the drawer. Just as Snape had promised, he had placed a small bottle of the potion in the drawer. He was to sit down before he drank it because from what Snape had said it was going to hit Draco like one of Hagrid’s punches. Draco took the small bottle out and set it down on the tabletop. He pulled his comfy, black chair up close to the bed. There was barely enough room for his knees. He sat down and held his head in his hands. He was starting to have doubts.

‘Oh shit, what am I doing? I can’t do this! Why am I here?’ Draco thought, letting panic take over for a moment. The panic disappeared just as quickly as it had come though when he looked up and saw who he was doing this for. She didn’t look any different than she did any other day, but somehow she seemed different to him now.

“Ok Granger, this is it. No more fucking around, it’s time to wake up.” Draco said firmly, gently grasping her shoulders. He released her and took several long, deep breathes before he grabbed the Mind’s Door potion off the table beside him. His hand shook a little as he took the bottle and pulled the cork out. He held the bottle at chin height and hesitated for a minute or two. Then he looked back over to the girl.

“To your health…” Draco whispered, holding the bottle up and then downing its contents. Snape had been right; it had smelled like hell and tasted twice as bad. Draco gagged a little but got it all down. Immediately he started feeling the effects.

“Oh…I’m so tired.” Draco said out loud to no one. His head was swimming; he could barely keep it from rolling around on his shoulders. He put on hand down on the mattress in front of him to brace himself and he slipped his other hand into Hermione’s. It was in that moment that the tiredness came to a screeching halt.

“UGGHHH!!! OH! GOD HELP ME!!!!” Draco screamed. His body jerked and writhed until he hit the back of his chair. Draco never imagined that that measure of pain even existed. He was positive that he was dying, sure that something had gone wrong and he would be dead in a matter on seconds. It was all over, from his head to his feet. It was too much for him to bear. When he passed out, he slumped forward. His upper body was splayed out on the bed, his head rest on Hermione’s knee.



All of a sudden the pain stopped, though Draco was sure he had gone blind. He knew that he was standing, but other than that he didn’t know what was going on. It was pitch black, he couldn’t see anything. He spun around and could barely back out the outline of a door.

‘A door…of the mind. I think it worked.’ Draco thought. As his eyes adjusted to the extreme dark, he was sure that it was a door and that he had just come through it. He turned back around and slowly, cautiously stepped forward. He didn’t see anything in front of him. He held his arms out in front of him, though he really wasn’t sure what he would encounter. As he kept walking he did the only thing he could think of to do.

“Hermione!” Draco shouted. He heard his echo reverberate several times but there came no reply. He shouted a second time and then a third. After he called her name the fourth time he heard something.

“Who is there?” He heard a small voice from a distance away. He could barely hear it but he knew it was Hermione’s voice. Draco’s legs started moving quicker, heading in the direction of the voice.

“Keep talking Hermione, tell me where you are!” Draco shouted as his walk merged into a jog. His head darted around looking for something, anything but all he could see what black.

“I’m here.” Hermione’s vice was still soft but it was louder. Draco kept moving until he saw something. He had also run by it. To his right, on the ground, was the outline of a girl. He quickly closed the distance between him and the form sitting on the floor and dropped to his knees.

“Hermione?” Draco asked quietly. He was desperately waiting for his eyes to adjust so he could see her.

“Who are you?” Hermione asked weakly. She couldn’t see anything, but the voice was just a little familiar.

“It’s Malfoy…its Draco.” He replied quickly. He reached forward, searching for her hand. He found it and grasped it tightly. He brought her hand up and placed it on his face. She shifted her hand, moving her fingers around. Hermione brought her other hand up to his face and felt his face and his hair. Then she laughed and he could hear the relief in her voice.

“It’s you!” She cried as she lunged forward and wrapped her arms around his neck. She still couldn’t see anything but she now knew he was there. He was solid and not just some figment or phantom. Draco wrapped his strong arms around her and couldn’t help but smile.

“Yes, it’s me. I found you.” He whispered into her hair. He could barely see her but he knew she was there and he knew it had worked. She rambled on about how she thought she would never be ale to find her way and how she thought no one would find her. Draco said nothing; he nodded his head and held her. After a few moments, he gently pulled away from him and held her by her shoulders.

“Now that I have found you, it’s time to get the hell out of here. Alright?” Draco said, standing up and pulling Hermione to her feet.

“Oh yes, lets go!” She said happily. He turned back to the direction from which he came and guided her with him. They kept walking slowly until Draco could see the door he had first come through. He asked her if she could see it but she couldn’t. He walked up to the doorway and stopped just short of it.

“There is a door in front of you, I know you don’t see it but you have to go through it ok. I am going to give you a little push through and then I’ll follow you.” Draco explained gently.

“Are you sure this will work?” Hermione asked, her voice was thick with worry. Draco sighed and assured her it would work, all she had to do was go through the door.

“I will never forget this Draco.” Hermione said finally, squeezing his hand. She could not see him shaking his head sadly.

“Yes you will, you won’t remember any of this. Time to go now Hermione.” Draco said sadly. It was true. If the Mind’s Door draft worked properly, the subject would not remember any of what happened. Part of him was sad that she would not remember that it was him that had found her. It was then that his rationality kicked in and said that it didn’t matter who had helped her just so long as the end result was her waking up. Before she could say anything, he gently pushed her through the door and she vanished. When he knew she was gone he breathed a sign of release and followed her. He was met with resistance though. The door had shut.

“Oh shit…” Draco whispered. He was terrified, and with every right to be. He had left his body and if he did not return soon, the body would die.



Hermione’s opened her eyes and was immediately met with bright light. The sun had risen by now and it was flooding in through the windows of the hospital wing. She blinked several times and soon after she began becoming aware of the rest of her body. Parts of her felt numb; her arms and legs. She couldn’t feel them or move them. Hermione stretched her neck and inhaled deeply. She looked around and then finally down into her lap. It was a horrifying sigh to wake up to.

Draco still was still laid across her bed, his head still on her knee. His eyelids were not quite closed; Hermione could see that his eyes had rolled back. His mouth was slightly gaped open and a small stream of blood dripped from his nose and had made a stain in her blanket. Her hand was still in hers, though he wasn’t actually holding now. As soon as the image in front of her registered she gasped and shuddered. She had no clue what was going on but she did recognize that it was Draco and that the way he looked could in no way be good. Even though it hurt to move, she wriggled her hand out from his hand managed to reach over to him. He put her hand over his nose and mouth. He was not breathing. It was then that panic washed over her. She tried to call out, but her voice was scratchy and sore. It didn’t come out more than a whisper. Hermione moved her hand away from his mouth to his shoulder and tried her best to prod him, even though it was extremely painful. He didn’t move. She tried to call for help again but to no avail.

Not a moment later Draco’s body jumped back into movement. He flew up and leaned against the back of his chair. His eyes were wide, bloodshot and watery. He was violently gasping; his lungs could not get enough air. He couldn’t stop coughing as his head darted around, looking every which way. When he finally saw Hermione and the scared and bewildered look on her face, he stopped moving. His chest was still rising and falling, trying desperately to get more air. His red eyes widen even more and the tears streamed down from the corners of his eyes. He tried to speak but could only cough more. She watched him in awe and said nothing. Finally he had started to catch his breath and stopped coughing. He looked at her, and though he did not smile, he did look relieved. Before he fainted, he managed to spit out two words.

“Hi Granger.”




* - Good morning Mr. Malfoy. You are up early today.
** - Yes, I have a few things to do before everyone gets moving.
*** - Have a pleasant day Draco. I will see you later.
**** - Thank you Antoinette. Goodbye.