Hilltop Cottage

A/N: Thanks for the reviews. I know it\'s a departure from my usual fluff, but this is real life, painful as it is.



Apologies for the short chapter.

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As Hermione stared out of the window of the Boeing 747, her thoughts were not of Severus Snape, but of Harry Potter. He had surpassed himself in the past week, and she really didn’t know what she would have done without him. Ruefully, she realised there was a reason he was the Ministry’s Chief Administrator, the main being his ability to organise people into action at short notice. The fact that he would do anything to put space between her and Severus did cross her mind, but that was what she wanted too, so it was a win-win situation. She had told Harry what she needed to do, and he had done everything. All that was left for Hermione to do was to pack and rent the house out.



Part of the reason she had wanted to travel the Muggle way was because it gave her time to think, and consider what she had done. As the clouds floated by, Hermione stretched a little in her seat and closed her eyes for a moment. Leaving New Mills had been wrenching, but then it wasn’t the first time she had disappeared quickly. That was how she had ended up at Hilltop Cottage in the first place, after all. She was fortunate that she had options other than returning to the bosom of her friends, because she couldn’t stand Harry’s ‘I told you so,’ smug look for very long.



When Alicia Maines first muted the idea of Hermione’s visit, it had been for purely academic reasons, but over the past few weeks, during their encounters at dinners and events, the buds of a friendship had started to grow. She was unlike anyone Hermione had ever met. Bubbly, and as intelligent as she was herself, she also had a wicked sense of humour and Hermione had found herself being drawn to her more and more. The excitement she felt about her trip was almost overshadowing the uncomfortable ache of missing Severus, and she hoped that New York would provide her with enough distraction that she would be completely over him before long.



The plane began its descent, and Hermione looked out of the window to watch the city below her as the buildings came closer. She felt a sudden pang as she thought about starting a completely new life without Severus in it. She had hoped to persuade him to come with her, but she knew there would be no moving him, even before the argument. No, it was definitely better this way. Even Harry had said so.



Thinking back over the past week, Hermione couldn’t quite believe that she’d poured her heart out to Harry, of all people. There was no one else she could talk to really, not to mention he was the one who had found her in the store cupboard sobbing. It had only taken a couple of words of concern from him, and the events of the past month or so had come tumbling from her. Harry had listened without interrupting, and then proceeded to tell her that he had known all along that Severus would hold her back, and hadn’t he said that at the start? It stuck in her throat that he had been right, in the end. Severus wasn’t right for her, but she had been too close to him to see it.



The plane landed smoothly, much to Hermione’s relief, and before long she was pushing her luggage-laden trolley through to the exit, searching the gathered crowd for Alicia. It didn’t take her long to spot her, for the other witch was tall and willowy and towered over most people. Hermione could see her long, blonde hair shimmering as her head bobbed about looking for her, and as their eyes met, Alicia’s face broke out into a huge grin of white sparkling teeth.



‘Hey!’ she shouted, waving wildly and pushing her way through the crowds to get to her.



‘Hi,’ Hermione said, slightly breathless from pushing the trolley.



They paused as they looked at each other for a brief moment, then Alicia gave Hermione a huge hug, almost lifting her off her feet. They laughed, and Alicia linked her arm through Hermione’s as they walked out of the airport. Next to her, Hermione felt a little dowdy, with her bland brown hair and ordinariness, but Alicia was so warm and genuine that it didn’t matter. She had arrived, and she had a friend who was obviously pleased to see her.



It was a good start.





***



Depressed wasn’t a word that Severus would have used to describe his mood. Angry, maybe, or seriously pissed off- those were words he would use. He spent days lolling around in bed being angry. He spent long nights lying awake and being pissed off. He chose not to eat, or to shower. What was the point, after all?



He tried to distract his traitorous mind from thinking about Granger. She was in the past. She had come, they had fucked a bit, and then she’d gone. That was, as they say, that. It was nothing, a mere sideshow in his life. Perhaps one day he would look back and treasure the memory, but at the moment he was too busy being irate with her.



Fortunately, his feelings for Lily were similar to those he felt for Hermione right now, so he found it quite simple to put her in a box of her own and close the lid. Sometimes, though, when he was exhausted from insomnia and his emotions had snuck their way to the surface, he would remember her skin, the scent of her sex, and how it felt to be inside her.



At those times, Severus would hide under his bedclothes and pretend his tears were a natural part of being pissed off and overly tired. He would tell himself that tomorrow things would be different. He would get up and shower, and brew some potions, and perhaps take a trip to Diagon Alley. He was overdue a trip to the bank, and he needed to visit his suppliers. That’s what he would do tomorrow.



Tomorrow came and went because he just didn’t know where to start. Another week went by, until he couldn’t even stand his own company anymore and dragged himself reluctantly into the bathroom. He washed his hair twice, having watched with disgust as the dirty suds disappeared down the drain. When he’d finished, he took his time to shave off over a month of beard growth, and was shocked by the sight of his gaunt face in the mirror. It was this that finally kicked Severus up the arse.



No woman was going to crush him. Not this time, and never again.