Distorted Exposure

AN: Cheers!

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Harry was exhausted. Completely and utterly exhausted to the point where he marvelled at being able to keep his position, perched atop a wooden bar stool, supported by little more than the counter in front of him against which he braced one elbow.

In his hand was a butterbeer, not the strongest of drinks but soothing enough to his aching limbs and not enough to hinder his body which was already quite sluggish with fatigue any further. A part of him was glad he was exhausted, it kept his mind in a dull, unproductive haze which in turn kept thoughts he preferred not to entertain behind bolted doors. And also, though it hurt him a little to admit it, feeling his body ache and scream at him in protest to the treatment it had endured was a feeling that he was use to and it kept him from having to deal with the other sensations that his memory insisted on provoking in his body. But then, he reminded himself, it was better not to think about such things at all. That was what heavy, bolted doors were for, to keep such thoughts away.
Taking another long swallow of butterbeer Harry tried to remember why he wasn’t at home in his bed, laying his aching body down to sleep. That explanation was easy enough to come by. A picture of a miscellaneous flat wrapped package swam to the forefront of his mind. The Boys Love magazine was set to be released in no less than a week’s time, now, nearly two months after Harry had left the mansion after the final photo shoot. Having been a component in the production of the main feature of that month’s issue, Harry had been sent a preview of the magazine for his own viewing pleasure just two days ago. After reading the attached note Harry had tossed the unopened package on his otherwise neatly kept desk and had avoided so much as looking at it since.

Yet the night before he had hardly slept because every time he drifted off and let his gaurd down his mind became muddled with thoughts and memories of the photos that had been taken; he began to imagine how such images would look like published in the magazine, and wondered which ones had been used, and most distractingly his thoughts came to land on the enigma that was Draco.

Sitting there, at the bar, Harry allowed his mind to drift without thought of restraint for once but he found he could hardly think clearly of anything in particular. He had spent two months trying to forget, trying to move on and yet there was still a part of him that ached to be reunited with that feeling that only seemed to come to him in his memories.

A resounding slap of something hitting the counter in front of him snapped Harry from his daze. Wondering whether he had jolted as visibly as he had mentally Harry took a second to glance at the offending object. It took a moment for him to fully process what he was seeing and when he did Harry began to feel as though he was choking on his own heart which had jumped up, beating and frantic into his throat.

Harry felt the reservations built up over two months shatter without effort as doors bolted shut in his mind flew wide open and flooded his memory and consciousness.

In the pale gleaming light of the pub, laying against the heavily varnished surface of the counter was the centerfold of Boys Love magazine, featuring a picture of himself and Draco, reflected once over in their sinful embrace.

And then in the chaos which his mind had degenerated into, and the past the yearning of his heart rose one undeniable thought. The magazine was had not been released yet. Next to no one had a copy. Yet he had been sent a copy. That meant...

Harry swivelled around on his barstool and slid right off in his haste, stumbling a little as his wearied limbs struggled to keep him standing. But then the adrenalin that flooded him upon taking in the sight in front of him made him feel as though he could have circled the globe on a broom at that very moment, exempting the fact that he didn’t want to be anywhere but standing right there at that very moment.

“Draco?” The word barely made it past the choking lump in his throat and sounded more like a strangled cough than anything. The blond looked brilliant in his eyes, even in the shimmering light of the pub.

Harry didn’t so much as think of jerking away when Draco grabbed him in a vice like grip by the wrist and yanked him from the bar to a more private alcove by a support post that sprung from the wall. The light was fainter still here and yet Harry was able to examine every last detail of the blond once more, drinking it in and replenishing the memories that had become jagged and blurry with the time that had passed.

Inches. That’s what separated him from the slightly stiff body between him and the wall. And yet that felt like too much. After having had nothing for so long Harry felt he couldn’t stand the empty space between them. He wanted to press into Draco, to pin him against the wall and ravage him, to take him so hard and deep that he would forget his own name. And yet he trembled with the thought of doing anything, saying anything, so much as thinking anything that would make Draco leave.

Draco stood in silence, his mercury eyes swirling with a mix of so many emotions and thoughts as they stared at an ambiguous spot somewhere beyond Harry shoulder.

“Harry...”

That voice. Harry felt it fall against his ears like the softest caress. It made him shudder.

“Look...”

Again Draco voice seemed to fail him and Harry was tempted to tell the man who stood before him to forget words and simply to consent to engage his lips in a much more fruitful act and yet Harry couldn’t bring himself to so much breathe in a breath too loud. He didn’t want to startle Draco.

“This whole time I...I was thinking, remembering, want-”

Draco broke off again and Harry felt the hand still clasped about his wrist tighten almost as though Draco thought he would try to pull loose. The light played tricks with the shadows and Harry felt his heart play tricks with his mind.

“Then that blasted magazine came in the mail. I looked. I couldn’t help myself.”

Harry jarred and the entirety of his insides seemed to jolt with the implication as the unwrapped package laying on his desk came to the forefront of his mind.

“Two months! Two months I spent trying to think of anything but you, anything but how I felt with you...”

Draco trailed off again and Harry couldn’t hold himself back any longer. The space between them was reduced to nothing and Draco’s lips were on his own as soon as he’d managed to snake his hand to the back of the blond’s neck. His other hand was still trapped by Draco grip, held quite awkwardly to one side and yet Harry couldn’t have cared less. Warmth flooded him and the lips beneath his own caressed memories to life and sent electric thrills racing through his body.

A low buzz started in the background, carried forward by what was perhaps Wood’s voice but Harry hardly heard for the tongue that was pushing against his and the warmth that Draco’s body was, pressed against him.

When Harry drew away breathless his eyes locked with mercury again and he was bound.

“I’ve missed you.” Harry braved at last, not sure if saying such a thing was the right thing to do and yet no longer capable of keeping silent.

“The way you feel...I thought I hated being so vulnerable, being laid bare like that but then every day that passed I wanted to feel that way again...”

Harry pressed closer to the blond, loving the way that Draco seemed to perk up a little at the touch. Harry watched countless emotions pass before his eyes and let the silence reign between them, not keen to break it, not keen to lose what he had.

“I needed it.” Was the blunt statement and yet Draco seemed to tremble from head to foot with the force of what he had admitted. “I tried to feel that way again, the way you made me feel but nothing worked, no one could touch me like that.”

“You let other men shag you?!” Harry hissed, suddenly very open to having his voice heard.

“No.” The tone was flat and Harry immediately found himself stroking the soft hair at the nape of Draco’s neck in a way of apology. He felt the blond quiver and the voices in the background seemed to pick up. Harry cast a swift glance back and saw that Wood had picked up the carelessly cast magazine and was now examining it quite thoroughly, and he was not alone in the process.

“Let’s go somewhere more private.” Harry whispered against Draco lips as he pressed against them, his tongue seeking out the blond’s, a movement that was met quite eagerly. Draco moaned.

“Fine.”

“My place or yours?”

“Don’t care...”

“Hold on tight.” Harry urged, as he shifted his hand and grabbed the wrist of the hand which Draco still employed at holding his own wrist. They turned, fell through the darkness and stumbled. Harry braced himself against the bed which was now at his back and held Draco to himself.

For some desperate reason Harry felt as though if he let Draco go, if he eased his grip even the slightest bit then Draco would disappear, like some figment of his imagination.

“I can’t stand the thought of having to depend on anyone but myself.” Draco whispered against Harry’s neck, half hoping the brunet wouldn’t hear him. Draco became quite familiar with the sensation of falling as Harry tugged them both to the king sized bed behind him. Draco felt as though his entire body was on fire from merely touching Harry.

And then Harry was kissing him, sweetly, deeply, in that way that stole the breath from his lungs and erased all cohesive thought from his mind. Draco felt as though his heartstrings were being plucked at and they were singing in a strangled sort of joy, swimming past all the insecurities that twisted deep and dark in his stomach. It almost felt enough to be lying there in Harry’s arms.

Harry broke the kiss and slipped one hand beneath the various layers of Draco’s clothing until he reached skin. Draco gasped as slow circles were rubbed against the seeming hypersensitise skin of his abdomen.

“I want you so badly...knowing who you are, knowing what’s right, knowing everything that I know...I can’t seem to change the way I feel.” Harry paused. “ And, honestly, I don’t want to.”

Draco groaned. He could feel Harry’s erection pressing against him and his own response to being so close to the brunet after what had been two very long, torturous, unsatisfactory months. But then it was more than that, it was about the way Harry’s arms were wrapped around him and how his body lay under him and about every little thing that seemed to draw him without reservation into that which was Harry. And those words, words he hadn’t even realized he had longed to hear, seemed to serenade him.

“It not in my nature to be so disarmed.” Draco muttered in way of explanation. Draco found himself flipped on his back with Harry’s body pressing him into the mattress in a matter of seconds. The contact was exquisite. The moan that came from his throat was shallow and yet without resistence.

“Draco.” Harry voice nearly sounded angelic to him and the implications were clear.”

“...but I can’t just turn my back on this.” Draco murmured at last. And suddenly Draco felt very free, light as a feather and lit on fire as Harry’s body pressed against him. Harry thrust down against Draco lean form and their erections met in delicious harmony. It was pure ecstasy.

“I can’t give up on the way you make me feel.” Draco managed to gasp. Though he wasn’t quite sure how he could even form a sentence when the pleasure that coursed through him was enough to make him forget to breathe.
Suddenly Draco found that clothes were rather unnecessary. When the bare skin of his torso touched Harry’s own lean body it was heaven. When Harry slipped his hand pasted everything around Draco’s hips to palm his erection it was all Draco could do to contain the scream that bubbled up in his throat to a low keening groan. When Harry kissed him Draco rather thought even his heart forgot to beat and when he pulled away every memory Draco had of Harry flooded his mind making him whimper.

“I want this.” Draco moaned, feeling slightly dizzy by then. He needed Harry to hear his words.

And then suddenly everything came to a grinding halt.

“Are you sure about this Draco...? Because if you allow me to have you in my arms again I won’t be able to let you go this time.”

Draco blinked once, and took in a deep filling breath before meeting Harry’s emerald gaze.

“I’m yours.” He murmured and as he did all the clamouring feelings within him seemed to fall to peace and his mind was blank and open. Harry leaned in and kissed him so thoroughly that Draco felt as though there was nothing left to say or tell.

Closing his eyes, Draco threaded one hand through Harry’s black locks and let the other host over the button of Harry’s pants. The brunet moaned into the kiss that still locked their lips and with unmatched ease and speed had Draco’s pants undone and pushed past his ankles before Draco could so much as get a gasp in.

It took a few more frenzied moments before they were both unclothed but the moment their bare forms melded together was utter bliss for Draco. Harry settled between Draco’s legs and slowly began to trail kisses down Draco’s jawline. The blond was so receptive and pliant below him and it sent molten pleasure coursing up his spine simply to hear the moans and whimpers that past his rose lips.

Draco eagerly spread his legs as Harry traced one hand down the inside of Draco’s thigh. He raised his hips as Harry traced one finger around his quivering entrance. He forgot to breathe as Harry took one dusty nipple into the warmth of his mouth and for once didn’t pull up masks as Harry delved so deep into him Draco couldn’t quite discern where he ended and Harry began.

“Mine.” Harry whispered into Draco’s ear, knowing the blond had his eyes tightly shut. Pressing two slick fingers into the tightness that was Draco, Harry allowed himself to cherish the moment.

Draco used a hand on Harry’s neck to draw him into a deep and languid kiss, so in contrast to their otherwise frenzied and desperate movements. Draco’s cock throbbed as Harry’s hand ghosted over it and their moans became one.

Gazing into silver eyes, Harry plunged into the heat of the body below him. Draco groaned at the feeling of being so full, the pain was in the background, not worth thinking about and the way Harry felt in him was beyond comprehension. Pleasure spiked in him as Harry slowing thrust in and out, almost quivering from the effort of staying in control. Draco felt all the world and it nearly took his mind, and he knew he could never simply go back to feeling nothing again.

Laying spent and sated some time later, gasping in tandem into the darkness of the room Harry couldn’t help but feel a swell of utter contentment rise up in him. Gently wrapping his arm around Draco’s waist he pulled the blond to him to the sound of a half muffled groan of protest as the movement.

A slow smile spread around his face as, still trembling and gasping, Draco pressed up against his side and lay his head over his still racing heart. Harry drifted off to the thought that nothing in the world could be more exquisitely perfect as that moment.

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AN: I spent every single spare minute I had writing this because if I didn’t I wouldn’t have a chance to finish it for another two weeks. As such it may contain many typos and a great deal of awkwardness. For now I simply wanted to get it out.

If you enjoyed this story please leave a review because this is indeed the end. Thank you to everyone who read and reviewed up to this point, you’ve all been great. I’ve had tons of fun writing this as I hope you’ve all had fun reading.

- Incessant_Darkness