Cracking the Gold

Author\'s Note: Well well. Whee. I\'m tired and have an exam tomorrow, so do I study? No. I post. Whee! Lol. Anyway, I don\'t know if any of you are interested but I have a Live Journal where there will be other short squickies eventually--there\'s only one there now. Kallipiak.

Disclaimer: See Introduction

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Harry finally let his gaze move from the fluttering shadows of the flames on the tiled floor to look at Draco\'s through his touseled bangs. His voice came in nothing more than a whisper, \"Why?\" His eyes hesitantly took in the other biting his own lip. Is he really that hungry...?


His brow furrowed slightly and it took him just a moment to find his own voice, \"Why what Harry?\"


His eyes lowered to the floor again, releasing Draco\'s wrist and letting his own hand fall limply to his side with a soft thud. \"Why aren\'t you hexing me to bloody hell and back like everyone else was...is...?\" Why aren\'t you hurting me, why are---how are you making me feel this way?


Draco\'s brow furrowed, blinking twice and shaking his head in slight puzzlement as he folded his dropped hand into his lap, \"Why would I?\"


Why would he? \"Why wouldn\'t you? You have your \'thing\' now. You\'ve won, you\'re Dark, you\'ve always made my life a bloody living hell, I\'m just a food source anyway, right?\" Harry let his eyes close then as another thought came to him, that he voiced without thinking. \"Or is it that you just want to leave the...the dirty work to Voldemort?\" Harry spat the lord\'s name, curling momentarily tighter to himself, then returning as per normal. His mind was screaming at Draco to say that nothing was true, but it he was hoping he\'d say it was. After all, if Draco just didn\'t want to be the one to dish that pain out, it would make sense why he\'d done nothing...but Harry wasn\'t sure what to do or feel if he\'d simply stood and watched, as much as he was starting to like the blonde.


Draco blinked twice at the accusations, then shook his head, \"If you were just a food source I would already have pounced you this morning Harry.\" His tone was level, probably the only indication of just how tense he was at the moment, \"And if it were my intention to hurt you, you would be in pain. What happened last night was beyond anyone\'s control. Anyone\'s but His.\"


Something rose in Harry\'s stomach with a twitch at a flicker of the thought that Draco would bite him again, but that died as his words continued. He realized he was right--he remembered how easily he\'d struck crucio on him the first day. Shivering at the pain he remembered coursed through him, he couldn\'t tell whether the curse had been worse, or being raped of everything he\'d worked to keep, with Cho and even the few times he\'d encountered un-nameable witches within pubs and bars when he was completely drunk. More so his Pride and feeling that he was beginning to feel real again.

\"But...\" He said the word, but he couldn\'t find the rest to follow it. But what? \"Why not...you thrived to annoy me before...\" His voice was quiet and he\'d shifted on the couch, twisting in his spot so his head was now closer to Malfoy, but he hadn\'t purposefully meant to do that.


Draco almost smiled, shaking his head as his hand settled into the other\'s hair once more, \"We were children then Harry. I wanted you to pay attention to me and that was the only way I knew how to do it.\"


I still feel like a child... Blimey, maybe I am. He couldn\'t for the likes of anything see why the prince would want something like that. He felt even more foolish continuing on with his \'W\' question, but he did none-the-less. \"Why...? Why would you want a bloody half-blood like me to pay attention to you? You had everything; Merlin, you couldn\'t walk the halls without leaving a wake of fainting or weak knee\'d witches behind you.\" Shoulders relaxed slightly as the other\'s fingers wove into his hair again, finally admitting he quite loved the feeling--it was enticing and calming.


\"Wizards too\" He added quietly. Then he shrugged, still petting the other\'s hair lightly since there had been no objection, \"Why wouldn\'t I want you to pay attention to me Harry?\" He shook his head, \"you were the only one worth it, at least then, status was everything.\"


\"You shouldn\'t have because I\'m only a half-blood. I thought you, or at least Slytherin despised anything that wasn\'t pure-blood.\" The small frame of a body relaxed more, arms folded across his chest as he laid on his side to forget about the pain elsewhere. \"How was I worth it? Being born into something you never wanted makes great status...\" His voice was sarcastic. He couldn\'t see how a Malfoy could ever see him in \'worthy\' sights. Wait... \"Why did you want my attention...I was nothing--am nothing.\"


Draco rolled his eyes, \"Except the once and future saviour of the wizarding world.\" He shook his head, \"You\'d touched true greatness before you even knew it. No one else had done that before you and probably no one else will after.\"


It didn\'t even strike Harry that he was almost having a conversation. Almost. \"More like \'the once future savior\' and even still, I didn\'t want it, didn\'t deserve it. I didn\'t do anything to get it, besides being born. How is that great?\" Harry found himself slightly irritated that Draco was avoiding answering why he\'d wanted Harry\'s attention, or perhaps he\'d worded it wrong? A lump formed in his throat as everything seemed to crash into a black hole within him, everything he knew. And something else was growing; something to feel for his rival? Yes, he couldn\'t deny it, but he would, just not to himself anymore. Exactly.


Draco rolled his eyes, shaking his head, \"Not just because of that.\" He half smiled, still petting the other\'s hair, \"Who wouldn\'t want you to pay attention to them? You honestly had no idea what a wake of weak-knee\'d students you left as well, faculty too as I recall.\"


\"I don\'t believe you...\" he muttered. He would have noticed something like that---wouldn\'t he? Surely Ron or Hermoine would have, and he didn\'t think they\'d keep something like that from him---even as a good tease.

Snape\'s face suddenly came into his mind, his words. \'You need a man.\' He felt a shiver tickle it\'s way up his spine at the Professor\'s actions after that. He wanted to gag again, yet he found it to----no. Lock that door. Shred it.

\"I...no.\" He returned back to his previous blubbering instead.


Draco shrugged, fingers still petting through the other\'s hair lightly, \"Don\'t believe it all you want. It\'s still the truth.\"


He laid still for the longest time. Minutes. Then he spoke. Will you take it away Draco? Can you...the pain? I don\'t want to think about it anymore...I...I like...this. He nudged his head up towards the petting fingers, eyes still closed. However, it was then he realized he hadn\'t spoken--merely thought. Could he say it? Could he admit outloud to himself and the blonde that he just wanted Draco. Er, to make things better of course. Oh hell, he wanted to let himself go, he wanted to continue as things had been before....before he\'d gone into that washroom. Everything had felt right then, not empty, hollow and meaningless. Not to mention painful.


Draco\'s brow furrowed just slightly, petting the other\'s hair still, he was sure Harry had spoken, but he couldn\'t make out the words, as if he were speaking in another room.


Damnit, say it, it\'s not like he probably doesn\'t already know! But, that\'s weak, I\'m not weak, but I am. Horridly weak. I just want this to go away--can you do that Draco? Can you replace this nagging pain, guilt and fear like you had earlier? Make me forget who I really am and loose me in the confusion and bliss of everything? Harry realized he hadn\'t let his head relax from the nudge he\'d made, and he finally let his neck muscles loose. He felt the tag on his collar slide along his skin via gravity to the couch. ...Will you bite me again...?


That last one came through clear as day and Draco blinked twice, knowing that Harry hadn\'t actually said anything. He ruffled his fingers through the man\'s hair again gently, \"Everything alright Harry? You\'re awefully quiet.\"


He nodded, then shook his head. He licked his lips shakily, trying to figure which words to say. Bloody hell, why don\'t you just wave a flag saying \'I\'m Potter. I can\'t do a damn thing I want to.\' Feeling tears starting to sting his eyes, he began to wonder why the hell he was so emotional lately. \"I...\" Go on... I. Want. You. \"I--\" To. Bite. Me. A shudder escaped Harry\'s shaking lips as he moved to sit up, ignoring the pain searing through him as he sat normally. A memory of the oozing bliss, the combination of Draco\'s fingers clasping around his neck and the popping and rush of blood flowing to the wound almost made Harry dizzy right there.

Unable to find the words, Harry\'s eyes flicked to Draco\'s through his tangled strands of hair, before returning to the ground. He then raised a tremmoring arm to his glasses, adjusted them, tucked some strands behind his ear. Then he continued the sweeping motion and tried to find a way to brush his hair free from his neck, tilting it slightly with nerves creating goosebumps everywhere.


Draco swallowed hard, that was something that was difficult to misinterpret. His tongue flicked out over his lower lip, breath having hitched in the back of his throat, leaning closer slowly, not entirely sure how to proceed with this, though he could already hear Harry\'s heart singing to him.


Harry tried pushing the pain that seared him back to nothing, his heart starting to pulse faster as his other hand raised and pulled his hair up onto his head as it was long enough. He looked like a girl pulling her hair up for a necklace to be placed, but he didn\'t think of that. His eyes fell closed as his skin tingled in anticipation, he almost had to remind himself how to breathe. Gravity fought to take over, but instead Harry diliberately tilted his head to the left; away from Draco, and pushed his chin outwards, stretching the muscles invitingly.


Draco swallowed reflexively again, not entirely sure why he was resisting this, breath cool against Harry\'s throat. One hand slid back to caress the back of his neck lightly, almost tentatively, leaving a fleeting kiss against the arch of Harry\'s throat.


Harry stiffened slightly, having not known whether Draco would take the invite or not, or how it would be approached. Letting his head fall back more and relax against and atop of the blonde\'s hand, Harry concentrated on his breathing rhythm, trying to keep it going.


Draco swallowed hard again, an almost whine building in the back of his throat, though he did finally bite down, tongue pressing against one of the punctures almost instantly to slow the flow of blood a little, not wanting to take too much, but knowing that he needed it.


Dropping his jaw, Harry inhaled briefly, then slowly exhaled as a tremmor ran through his body, arcing his back so he was now almost supported completely by Draco. His eyes stared into the distance beyond the ceiling before fluttering a few times and closing. His left arm fell down beside him, letting his hair free again as his right hesitantly rose, paused in mid-air before partially curling around the prince\'s neck.


Draco moaned softly as he continued feeding, his own eyes closed completely, holding Harry closer still, breathing shallow, trying to take his time.


Maybe it was the euphoria of the vampire feeding rushing through him, or maybe it was simply Draco, but Harry felt more relaxed at that moment than he had in a long time. Bliss coursed through his blood stream as he felt completely happy to let the other hold him as tightly as he wished.

A low moan escaped him as he tried to hide it, but failed as he barely tried. His arm curled behind the both of them hugged Draco tighter as he fought to remind himself to breathe.


Draco felt Harry\'s heart flutter once and drew away, pressing his tongue to both punctures, just for a moment, letting them seal, not wanting the other man to bleed out.


The softest whimper pried itself from Harry\'s lips, despite knowing why the other had drawn away. He let out a huskier moan instead, unable to form words at the moment as a thanks for--everything. Thanks for biting him, for making him feel wanted, for not killing him, for being there...for everything Harry couldn\'t comprehend-edly think at the moment. He didn\'t want to die, despite the complete heaven he\'d be in at that moment if he did, but he wanted to feel that again...he wanted to stay near Draco. Dizziness began to set in and he allowed himself to fall completely onto Draco, eyes closed and the faintest smile finally playing his lips.


Draco curled his arms possessively around the other man, holding him close, purring low in the back of his throat, hunger satiated for the time being, causing his mind to settle once more.


Harry felt the sickening feeling of the blood loss slowly take it\'s toll, and he fought to push it away, closing his eyes and taking deep breaths, resting his head down upon the blonde. He almost hated how much he enjoyed this...this moment. He felt needed, wanted---something he couldn\'t remember really ever feeling.

Mentally smacking himself, he shut his brain off for the time being, pushing the light wave of nausea down into his stomach again. Harry prayed that this wouldn\'t happen every time, that he\'d get used to the blood loss, because he loved the feeling too much.


Draco smiled just slightly, petting the other man\'s hair again, \"That\'s it Harry, just relax, you\'ve earned it.\" And he had, and likely he would get used to the feedings, it would just take time and trust.


Having something else to concentrate on; Draco\'s hands in his hair; settled him a bit. Not feeling like moving, he didn\'t voice his thought on getting something, even small, to eat and drink before he got up. He didn\'t want to get up anytime soon. Harry was amazing himself at how much he suddenly felt like he needed Draco, wanted him. He\'d have thought, had he forseen this--and if he had he would have prevented it--, that he\'d be terrified of Draco\'s touch, of anyone being near him. It seemed he just needed to force himself over it, and the near death experience and the...the assault had left him almost vocally begging the blonde for help, for forgiveness and comfort. It seemed amazing how one or two hours, if it was even that, could change someone\'s perspective so drastically.


Draco was aware of none of these thoughts, his own mind calm now that he\'d fed, almost calm enough to sleep, but not quite, nor would he wish to while his pet was still awake.


He would have slept, but he didn\'t want to without eating something first, so he didn\'t pass out in his sleep and go into some sort of coma. Harry shifted once again to curl up mostly on Draco, only his legs now on the couch, and slightly sideways, away from the other. He moved slowly, just in case. He would rather not ruin the mood with bile spewing from his mouth... After he\'d settled down again into the comforting arms, his eyes closed happily as tingles of sensations still rocketed through him, almost energizing him. Placing one arm below Draco\'s arms and the other above, he was almost hugging them, then he allowed his fingers to gently trace up and down his arms, succeeding in completely shutting his brain off---for once.


Draco smiled slightly at the position, continuing petting the other\'s hair, just holding him close, comfortable more than ever.


\"Thank you...\" A whisper. He didn\'t know what else to say. Good job genious...now he\'s going to ask for what. Then what will you say? Hmm? \'Oh, uh, thanks for not killing me\'? \'Thanks for making me feel more at home than I have even at Hogwarts\'? Face it scarhead, you\'re a bloody prat who has no idea what he\'s doing, except that he\'s enjoying it. A long sigh whisped from Harry\'s lips as he opened his eyes to confirm he wasn\'t as dizzy and feeling as ill as he had been moments ago.


Draco smiled slightly, he didn\'t ask, not sure he really wanted to know, he just said, \"You\'re welcome Harry. Feeling better?\"


\"A little... I just think-- I should probably have something before I really get up though, I think I read that in a Muggle Med book once...\" Or perhaps Hermoine had stated it, he wasn\'t sure. Everything was a blur right then, and he really didn\'t care. He was happy, not wanting to move and slightly hated that he implied that they might get up. He was afraid that if he moved from this, that it would be a dream, or something that he was seeing in his death. Something that he\'d become afraid of again once they parted and he had time to think again. Time to dwell on what he\'d lost in the war, what he\'d failed at.

He didn\'t want that anymore. It\'s bloody over---forget it already. You tried your one last stance, and look where it got you! Bloody raped that\'s what! Harry winced at how honestly blunt his thoughts were being. It\'s not like he\'d known Voldemort was going to do that...


Draco tilted his head, ruffling his fingers through the other\'s hair again, \"We can always get one of the houselves to bring you something, if you\'re comfortable here.\"


Harry smiled again, nodding and settling back down against the other. He felt completely relaxed and in a heavenly state at the moment, and he surprised himself when he showed this by placing a soft kiss on Draco\'s hand, which he\'d raised to his mouth. ...He sorta tastes good....


Draco smiled slightly at that, turning his hand over to caress the line of Harry\'s jaw and the side of his throat, fingertips warm against apparently cool skin, \"Anything in particular you want?\"


You... Harry swallowed the words back and thought. He felt drained--well, he was. \"Sweets?\" He was near positive some sugar would give him a boost, he rather did not feel like laying around and falling asleep. Laying around maybe, but he didn\'t feel like sleeping.


Draco chuckled softly, still petting Harry\'s hair gently, \"Anything in particular? Or just assorted sweets?\"


\"Anything...\" He didn\'t feel picky. Which was odd, normally he was. Then again, he wasn\'t normally curled up in Malfoy\'s lap, wishing he could purr at the fingers in his hair, on a euphoric high from being bitten and drained of blood.


Draco smiled again at that, nodding and snapping his fingers, one of the houselves scurrying in and bowing low. He smiled somewhat magnanamously, \"Dessert, and quickly.\"


Harry smiled at the house elf, not recognizing this one. He wondered how many Draco had... He was still holding Draco\'s hand which had gone to rest against his lap again, but he decided he rather didn\'t like that at the moment. Something stirred within him, and he couldn\'t tell if it was the hunger, the semi-boredom of doing nothing, or just...he felt like it.

Harry raised Draco\'s hand to kiss the palm again softly, pausing, then kissing it again--and again. And again. After a minute, he testingly slid his tongue almost teasingly against the skin, closing his eyes then laying his head down ontop of their hands on his lap.


Draco blinked, first at the kiss, then again at the licking, brows arching slightly. But he didn\'t say anything, just let Harry do as he wished for the time being.


A moment of silence passed before Harry spoke again. \"I can\'t explain it...\" This seemed to be an irrelevant statement of course, but he hadn\'t really realized the rest of the sentences were inside his head. His thumb idly trailed back and forth against whatever it hit.


Draco was almost purring at the touch, eyes half closed, watching Harry through his lashes, not about to interrupt whatever it was the other was doing.


Harry heard this, his head basically resting on Draco\'s stomach. He rolled his head backwards to look at the other, and assuming his eyes were closed as they seemed, he let his gaze linger on the features of his face. He couldn\'t see his bright silver eyes, but he was sure that they would sparkle somewhat. The blonde\'s skin didn\'t seem as pale as he remembered it--possibly from just feeding? The gaze trailed over his forehead and the few strands of hair falling in front of his face and he wanted to move them. But it looks so sexy.... Blinking his eyes a few times after that thought, then found his eyes lingering on Draco\'s lips. A gentle shiver trailed along Harry\'s spine when he thought about those lips, only minutes ago, clasped against his own neck--giving him the most relaxed and happy feeling he could remember.


Draco\'s eyes fluttered open a moment later, realizing what a close scrutiny he was under, \"Hm?\" The sound was almost sweet, questioning quietly.


Harry\'s ears burned instantly. Bloody hell! Er...look away. No! Not at his neck you prat...no not his chest either. Oh hell, just look him in the eyes now. ...Eyes. Eyes Potter, eyes. Not lips. EYES! Feeling like he could scald metal with his ears, Harry quickly turned his head and rested it down again, only not on Draco\'s hand, but beside it. Damnit!


Draco smiled slightly at that, shaking his head as he traced the shell of Harry\'s ear with his fingertips, now they were cool against warm skin, \"What is it?\"


Forcing himself to swallow, he shook his head, trying to stutter a \'nothing\' out. \"N....not your lips.\" Harry outwardly winced at that. He had not meant to say that. Really.


Draco blinked twice, brow furrowing slightly, \"Pardon?\" That was a puzzling statement even if he hadn\'t been paying attention.


Oh thank Merlin he didn\'t hear it... \"I said...uh...Nacho Chips. I\'m not sure why...\" He didn\'t want Draco to think he wanted Nacho\'s...he didn\'t. Far from. He kept his eyes low and on the ground, ears still burning like the flames in the pit. It didn\'t help, Harry now had Draco\'s lips dancing in front of even his closed eyelids.

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Responses to reviews on this chapter


Rose
Yay! That was very good. Help Harry get better soon, okay? Is he going to see Ron again in the near future? Please tell us more of what has been happening to him. This is awesome! Is harry breaking? Is Draco going to help him? Thanks for responding to the reviews. There are lots of authors who don\'t do that.

Update soon! ^_~

I believe Ron isn\'t gonna disappear. I can\'t garentee how much we\'ll see of him, but yea. I\'ll try to get Ron in more, so yea. ^_^ Harry hasn\'t annoyed Draco much lately so he hasn\'t had to go down and \"vent\" on Ron.


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Isis (to lazy to login)
ForbiddenBody@AOL.com
Hello! I love the new chapter. I\'ve been keeping up with this story since the very begining and I must say that it interests me very much. I would love to get your opinion on my own stories \"Hated but Loved\" and \"Apples never fall far from the tree\". Plz,plz,plz,plz,plz,plz update soon!

I read the first five or six chaters of Hated But Loved, however, I found it difficult to follow, since I don\'t knw how to say the names, never mind where they\'re from of anything. >_< Sorry, but someone else would probably be better at giving feed back.

E-mail me tho if you want, k?


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LPhoenix
great chapter... they are so cute.. in a weird sort of way.. i\'m glad that harry is finally getting on the plan tho... :) update again soon..

^_^ Thankies!


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look at my ding-a-ling-ling
Ooohhh! So the love will finally build!!! YAY!! I have just read your whole story in less than 2 hours!!
Its addictive and fun...but the raping bit was horrible... :( ...I was close to tears! Anyways, it seems that
Draco and Harry will finally work on their own love...See? out of every bad comes a good. Voldemort\'s dastardly
deed has pushed Harry and Draco closer together! :)
I really love this story and keep up the excellent work!
btw, will Ron be released from the basement? Can you make Harry entreat Draco to let him out of the basement?
Its really sad to think of Ron like that...
also btw, will Harry and Draco have...*blushes*...real sex now? heheheheh...just out of curiosity...
ciao!

*smiles* Yay a new reader!! *dances* *consoles and gives tissue while Harry rants that ~he~ was the one hurt and I\'m consoling a reader* ^_^ As for being *released*, I don\'t know. If he was \'let go\' it would probably be into the hands of Draco, or Voldemort or something. He might be given a bit more freedom, but I don\'t think he\'ll be released. Maybe sentenced to work the kitchens. Lol. XD

*smiles* As for the real sex---^_~. That\'s all I\'ll say. I lie. Yea, I\'m sure they will, don\'t worry. *I\'ll* be upset if they don\'t. *giggle*


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thrnbrooke
Too funny! I can\'t wait for chapter 26! Harry reactions to Draco was different then I expected. Wonder what Draco thinks about all of this....

In my opinion, Draco\'s happy that it didn\'t necessarily scar Harry as deeply as it could have. So it seems at least. ^_^ I\'m glad it\'s funny and not just sad. ^_^ I don\'t like completely sad things. I tend to try to lighten them up after a while. ^_^

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Isis (to lazt to log-in)
ForbiddenBody@AOL.com
Hahahahahahahahahahaha! I absolutely loved this chapter, I wasn\'t sure what it had to do with nacho chips but once I finished it made sence and now I can\'t stop laughing. You have to update soon!!!!!!!

Plz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ^_^BYE, Isis

*grins* Actually, you threw me off. I was just about to update and I saw your review, so I had to respond first. :)

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sbkar
From lips to nacho chips!!!! Well done...at first, I was squicked, but now, I\'m enthralled....

*grins* I\'m glad you\'re not squicked anymore!! ^-^


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Fefs
Awwww, what a cute chapter!! really sweet! I was surprized to see the way harry reacted cause.. i dunno.. i kind of thought that i would hate Draco for all eternety for what happened.. but seing this chapter i discovered i\'m a quite forgivefull person!! I loved the way harry is not broken and is finally accepting that he Likes Draco.
I\'m sure Draco is thinking about doing the macarena after the way Harry is treating him.. So cuuuuute!! Really!!
Please update soon, ok?

Review apart: The nacho thing was just amazing.. I actually laughed!! really good idea! It\'s fun to read this bettersweet thing.. sad.. but not to sad.. and then Harry is so cute that makes the thing funny!
Hope you are plaining on leting the ex-virgin see that sex can be REALLY good... oO

Ahh, my beloved fangirl. ^_^ I thought that he would hate Draco forever too...but... *shrug* Time will tell I guess. :) I laughed when you said the macarena thing. I can just see this prime and proper Draco just all relaxed and content \'as a kitten with cream\' and suddenly jusmp up with music out of no where and shakin\' his shexy ass! *giggles*

*cough* Anyway.

As for the ex-virgin sex stuff...^_~ *giggle*


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