Lucius and the Waif - COMPLETE

The character of Lucius Malfoy belongs to J.K.Rowling. I am only borrowing him for a while. No copyright transgressions are intended and no profit is made.
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Chapter Twenty-Four - A Snake in Eden


Lucius was attempting to keep his emotional distance while enjoying all the varied ways he and Lea spent time together. He had to spend some time each day with his business ventures and estate accounts, but he started longing for her when he was away from her. It irritated him and made him try to stay away from her more. Then he was miserable. He was on an emotional seesaw and knew he had to do something - either let her go, or commit himself totally. This halfway existence as merely lovers wasn’t working any more. He was his own worst enemy now. How long had he been fooling himself? He was in love with her. But was she in love with him? Such a powerful dark wizard afraid of a little Slytherin female with few accomplishments, except her sharp intelligence and her ability to tie him in amorous knots. She didn’t even know she was doing it – did she?


Lucius was afraid to put his feelings to the test. He didn’t want to lose her. How could he bear it if she left? He was getting so angry and crazy and panicked he was affecting their relationship because, of course, she knew when something upset him.


Lucius finally decided he couldn’t continue in his emotional turmoil. It was time to let fate take over for good or ill. He called Lea into his study and sat her on the sofa, sitting down beside her.


“What’s wrong, Lucius?” Lea reached up and ran shaky fingers down his cheek. “I can see you’re upset. You’ve been moody for a while now. Are you mad at me?” Lea was suffering from fear herself. She’d worried that he was getting tired of her and wanted her to leave.


“Sweet Goddess, no, I’m not mad at you,” he laughed mirthlessly. “Just the opposite in fact.” He took her hand in his, “Lea, I can’t go on like this.”


Lea gulped in absolute terror and for the first time in countless weeks, she started involuntarily to fade. Lucius saw her and leaned down and kissed her passionately trying to stop her departure, and because he needed to be reassured himself. When he saw she was still with him, he said, “Lea, I want you to be my wife.”


Lea was so shocked she turned almost white. She looked at him with her cobalt blue eyes abruptly swimming in tears. Lucius’ heart lurched painfully at her reaction, until she said, “Oh, Lucius, I love you so. I would be honored to be your wife. I have wanted you for so long, but I thought I was just going to be transitory in your life.”


Lucius was having trouble taking in her answer. Now he was in shock. His mind fastened on the minor detail that the word ‘transitory’ must be one of her new words. That lightened his mood and he started to believe he was getting what he wanted. He realized he wasn’t breathing and exhaled in a rush.


Lea was enthralled at Lucius’ offer. She was gazing at him with new eyes, seeing him as her husband, the most beautiful man she’d ever seen. And now he was hers. Beautiful form, serpentine mind, and an unlimited capacity for sexual adventures. His wealth never even crossed her mind. It truly wasn’t important to her. She’d lived with him in a small apartment, and now a huge mansion. Places and possessions didn’t matter to her. Only Lucius. They Apparated to their bedroom to seal their new commitment to each other, slowly learning how it felt to make love when they knew it was part of a lifetime promise now.


It took several days before Lea came out of her happy fog to do any thinking again. She finally realized she needed answers to Lucius’ past. If she was going to be a permanent part of his future, his past needed to be cleared up and then put away. Screwing up her courage, Lea approached Lucius at dinner one evening with her questions. “Lucius, I’d like to know some of what I know you’ve not told me about your past. I need to know about that tattoo and my father’s connection to your past. If you decide to keep me in the dark, it will become a barrier in our marriage. And I’ll constantly fear that someone else will tell me what I should have heard from you. I need to know, Lucius.”


Lucius had been waiting for the axe to fall. He’d known it was only a matter of time before Lea would ask. She now had the right to ask; he’d tacitly given it to her with his proposal of marriage. Lucius looked down at his plate, gathering his thoughts in despair. What a short engagement this would turn out to be, if she couldn’t stomach his past. He sighed and looked up into her very serious blue eyes.


“I’m going to tell you what I can without divulging information damaging to other people. I can’t ruin other wizards’ and witches’ reputations and their very lives to save my relationship with you. If that is acceptable to you, then I will tell you what you wish. You may not like hearing what you’ve asked for, and if you decide anywhere in the narration that you want out of our engagement, please tell me immediately. At that point further disclosures would be unnecessary. I hope you understand.”


Lea never wanted to lose him, and hoped what she had asked of him would not break her faith in, or love for him. But he was sounding as though it was going to be impossible for her to get beyond his past. She had second thoughts about asking for his history, but she knew it was a time bomb waiting to go off between them. She wanted to learn from him, not some busybody with a score to settle. He seemed miserable to her, even though he wasn’t showing his feelings on his face. How did she know? The set of his shoulders? The angle of his chin? The way he held his head? Perhaps his very stillness. All she knew was he was telegraphing his misery to her, when he thought he was displaying no feelings at all. Lea got up, resettled in a chair beside him and picked up his hand. “Tell me,” she said.


Lucius began slowly, starting with his ancestry and the importance of his heritage to his name. He told her about his concerns over the intrusion of the Muggle world which he had told her before. But now he added that he had decided to follow a powerful dark wizard who wanted to keep out anyone magical with any Muggle blood from their community. He had belonged to a radical group of wizards and witches called the Death Eaters who took these beliefs many steps further, desiring the eradication of Muggles if it could be done. With their Dark Lord’s goodwill, they had killed Muggles and Muggleborns who were in their way, and had tortured others to gain information. Even purebloods who didn’t agree with them had sometimes been killed. Lucius didn’t paint a pretty picture of himself, preferring to have it all out at once for her view.

Their plan was to take over the magic community and the Ministry of Magic, ruling according to their own set of values. Toward the end, when the movement failed, Lucius had been tucked away in Azkaban and out of the fray. He wasn’t sure what he would have done if he had been free to work for his side. Probably more mayhem.


“And my father? Was he a Death Eater too? That’s the tattoo you have, isn’t it. Your radical group? Why was my father in Azkaban? I never knew.” Lea didn’t really want to know now, either, but she knew she had to, for the sake of her future with Lucius.


Lucius truly didn’t want to add any more pain to his little Slytherin fiancée, but couldn’t see any way to avoid it now. “Yes, he was a Death Eater even before I was. He was in prison for life for killing a large group of Muggles.”


“You mean he murdered them, don’t you?” Lea’s heart plummeted to her feet. Her father was a murderer. And now her fiancé was a murderer, too. She had known some of his proclivities were rather dark and violent, but he had never taken their intimate relations past where they both wanted to go.


Lea realized then that she herself had some dark and, yes, violent proclivities of her own. They played themselves out with Lucius, leaving her sated and not needing any other outlet. Perhaps Lucius now had the same outlet with her. Could she be enough for him? Did he still need to take up arms against the Muggles of the world? Lea’s mind froze at that thought. “Lucius, do I have Muggle blood? You know the answer, don’t you! Have you been enjoying our type of sex because I have Muggle blood? Has your interest all been a form of extended torture against me?” Lea pulled her hand away from his, but left it on the table. As her mind grappled with the question, she saw that she probably did not have Muggle blood if Lucius was so up in arms about it. He wouldn’t have done for her what he did, if she’d been tainted in his eyes. But she wanted him to tell her anyway.


Lucius recognized her faint withdrawal but saw it as a bit of encouragement that she hadn’t completely removed her hand from near his. He was coming to the really delicate part of their relationship now. His past was horrific enough, but it was a history lesson, and hadn’t touched her personally. This would be a very different exposure for him now. He was so tired. Had he lost her? Would he when she knew?


“Yes, I know your background. You told me yourself. I knew your father, but not well. He was almost before my time as a Death Eater. You are not a Muggle. You have no Muggle blood. You’re a pureblood witch. And Slytherin, like me.” Lucius waited for the question he knew was coming now.


“When did you know?”


There it was, the one piece of knowledge he would rather have been tortured himself than divulge to her. Lucius sat up straighter and faced her down. “I can tell you whatever you want to hear, Lea. What do you want to hear from me? I knew before I made any effort to help you? I only found out yesterday? What would you like, my love?”


“The truth,” she whispered.


“Very well,” he said, raising his chin, and crying inside. “I knew about your bloodline before I helped you. I would not have helped you if you had been Muggleborn or a Halfblood. I recognized you as Slytherin, my house, very early on, and your antecedents rather quickly after that. That decision is part of who I am. I do not apologize for it.”


“So I would have been just a temporary whore to you if I had not passed your blood test?”


Lucius’ brain was starting to move again, defending himself against her conclusions. “Would you have wanted to live with me if I was ugly? Or had a braying laugh? Or spots? Where is this line you are drawing concerning my preferences?”


“Well, I guess I’m not trying to exterminate everyone who is ugly, or has a braying laugh, or spots, although I might make an exception for Wardens. But apparently you have been trying to eradicate Muggles.” Lea considered. “I guess I do have to decide if I can live with a man who murders others according to their bloodlines.”


“And if I promised I was not going to go down that road again?”


“Then I guess I have to decide if I believe your promises.”


“I see. Well, do keep me informed on those many decisions, won’t you?”


It was the first time he’d ever used his nasty sneer on her. She’d only ever seen it leveled at the Warden. In this case, however, she knew it meant he was hurt by her answers.