Why him?

I'm so sorry for the wait, moving, painting and taking care of everything have caused problems for my story, my inspiration is so low that I don't even enjoy reading. But don't worry, I will finish this story, but it won't be a weekly update from now on.

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I don't think anybody knew what to say or do right then, even the teacher was shocked. Nobody had expected a student, and especially not a Gryffindor, to try and kill Harry Potter. The few seconds that passed felt like minutes, until Hooch spoke.

“Miss Granger, please go and get the headmaster, tell him it's urgent.” Her face was still as straight as before but her voice was shaking. “As for you, Miss Weasley, I think it best if you come with me.” The three students who had - surprisingly - tried to stop her seeing as they were all friends of Harry, turned her around so she faced the teacher.

I couldn't believe how lucky we were; I didn't think the spell would have killed him if she had managed to finish the incantation since you need a great deal of power to cast it successfully. After all, the art of spell casting is more than just words.

When they had taken Weasley away, Harry's friends ran over to him to hear how he was. I was just about to leave when one of them stopped me and shook my hand, apologizing for not believing me and thanking me for saving Harry. I didn't save him to be thanked, but it was nice to be acknowledged.

And then, to make this day even worse, Harry walked over to me and hugged me, but that wasn't the worst part, no. When the hug was over he looked directly into my eyes and kissed me.

My whole body felt warm, my mind was cloudy and I forgot my surroundings. The boy had ruined everything for me. The kiss didn't last for more than three seconds, but those seconds were enough for everybody to see us. I could hear gasps, whispers, and even some giggles. Does he realise what he has done? It's his own choice if he wants to tell everyone that we fucked, but kissing me in public meant that we were a couple, and I had never agreed to that.

But I didn't say anything, telling him what I felt when we were surrounded by everyone would only destroy both of us, so I had to stay calm until I had a chance to talk to him in private. After a few seconds where it didn't look like Harry would be alone I left. I didn't want to be confronted by anyone, especially not if they were thinking of asking about the kiss.

-o-

Everything would have been great, besides my unwanted relationship status. If Harry knew what his little gesture did to me he would certainly have stayed away from me while we had an audience, or would he? Maybe he decided to use that moment and mark his territory. I could feel the rage bubbling up inside me again; if Harry did indeed do it on purpose then he will be sorry, especially if that is the thanks I receive after I saved his life.

I had to relax. Fussing over something that was surely just a moment where Harry must have lost some of his brain cells wouldn't make my situation better. I needed to talk to him first and see his side of the story before jumping to any conclusions.

But finding Harry was a whole other story; now that he was back everyone wanted to see him. So instead of standing in line like a fool I decided to send him a letter, requesting his presence later that evening. I know I should demand it, after what he did to me he shouldn't have a choice, but I was pretty sure he would come anyway. Why is it that I have changed for him? He was just supposed to be another boy that I've fucked, no big deal. But I still wanted to make him happy and I want to be there for him.

Later that evening while I was sitting in the Slytherin common room reading a book, someone crept up behind me and wrapped their hands around me. The gesture scared me so I grabbed the arms and twisted them around so whoever was behind me would be held against my chest, their back to my front. However, as soon as I saw who the arms belonged to I was glad I didn't use more force than I did, but even after I had learned my attackers identity I didn't release him.

“What do you think you're doing?" I asked incredulously. "And who let you down here?” Harry tried to look at me but my grip on him made it difficult.

“I didn't know a hug could cause damage,” he said while trying to turn around again. “And it was a good friend of yours that let me in.”

“I have no good friends in this house, especially not if they let you in to scare me.”

“You also asked me to come.” I had almost forgotten about that; the book I was reading was so interesting that I'd even forgotten I was sitting in the common room.

“I didn’t ask you to scare me,” I said, quite annoyed. After his near-death experience he has become a pain in the ass, he seems to challenge me every time we’re together.

“So I scared you? I thought nothing scared you.” And then he uses my words against me! He's become far too arrogant.

I released him; there was no point in holding him there if he enjoys it.

“You don’t scare me,” I muttered, and he smirked. Who did he think he is? “Come.” It was time to talk about what he did earlier.

I led him to one of the small rooms that surrounded the Slytherin common room; they were there for studying but everybody used them for something else. Using one of the rooms alone with Harry would look like something completely different for the rest of the house, and I didn't need more rumours flying around the school, but at that moment I was too impatient and I didn't care so I pushed him into the room before closing the door behind us.

“So, what’s up?” he asked nonchalantly. Did he really have no idea why I asked him to come? Maybe he really didn’t think about what he did when he kissed me, maybe it was just a mistake.

“Why did you kiss me yesterday? Do you know what a kiss in public means?”

“Blaise, I thought we were over this,” he said, seemingly exhausted. “You say you didn’t want to be with me, but then you show that you care about me and my health and basically save me. Don’t tell me that you don’t want to be with me, not after what you have done for me.”

“Harry,” I began, looking away from his eyes. “You know that we can’t be together, I’m not capable of staying in a relationship.” I was expecting a spell, or a punch or something physical from him, but he never touched me. He stared at me for a number of seconds before his rage must have got the better of him and he began to call me nasty things. My only problem with his sudden anger was that he was shouting it out; now everyone will turn their attention towards this room.

“You bastard, do you really think that I'll let you get away from me that easily?! I'm sick and tired of doing as people say, dating who they think I should date, and fucking the ones that they have approved! You will be mine, just wait and see, Blaise!” He pushed the door so hard that it hit the wall behind it and bounced back, but he didn't care as he stormed out from the common room. I was shocked over his outburst but I didn't say a word while he was shouting at me, not that I would dared to try and stop him once he'd begun. The strangest thing about our reunion was that his short speech scared me; Wealsey had been the same way when she decided that Harry was hers, could he have changed into her?

When I left the room I was shocked to see that most of the Slytherins were staring right at me; Damn it, how could I have forgotten the silencing charm? Now everybody knew that I was with Harry, and that we've had some sort of a fight about our relationship. But maybe this time they would see that we're not a couple, if I'm lucky.

-o-

The story about Harry visiting me spread faster than lightning, which was something I didn't appreciate at all, but luckily for me that seemed to be the bad thing happening. Since Weasley's use of an unforgivable she had been spending more time in Dumbledore's office than Draco could find something rude to say about her, and because she was stuck there most of the day I didn't worry that much about her seeing Harry, not that I cared of course, but I still didn't want her to be near him.

Most students and teachers were convinced she was the evil one, but there was someone that just didn't believe the truth; Granger. After all that happened Granger still wouldn't believe me, and on top of that she wouldn't leave me alone when she saw me.

Several times a day I would be fighting with her just so she would step out of my way; her stubbornness enraged me. But I wan't only thinking about Granger and Weasley, those girls were annoying so I ignored them whenever I could. I thought I might have been obsessed with Harry before but now after he'd come back to school he never left my mind. I was beginning to think that I was crazy because I thought he was calling me, when he wasn't even close to me. He possessed my mind so much that I did badly on the few tests we had left before the exams, which is a bad thing because if I didn't pass my exams with my required score I would lose my job opportunity.

It wasn't until three days before my first exam that I managed to get my feelings on the right track, thankfully.

At first I had a meeting with Dumbledore. He told me how brave I was and what a good job I did of protecting Harry, even if it meant exposing Weasley. I would have left in the beginning of our conversation, but I knew he would eventually lead the conversation to something more important. Then he told me shortly what he had been doing with Weasley. Apparently he was preparing her for court; even if she was underage they wouldn't spare her, especially since she tried to use an unforgivable.

Secretly I hoped they would find her guilty and send her to Azkaban to rot, but I know they would never let her rot there, based on her age they might give her a few years. The date for her hearing would be in five day - the day after my transfiguration exam. At least I would have a small break before my potions exam that would come two days after the first one.

After Dumbledore made sure I knew what would happen with Weasley he told me that I was going to be called in to testify. At first I didn't understand what I had to do with her, but everyone who had read the newspapers or heard the rumours knew I was connected to them in one way or another. Defeated I released my breath I'd been holding in and sunk even deeper down into the chair I was occupying; Harry brought me more problems again.

During the hearing I would probably be asked about my relationship with Harry, and I would be obligated to tell them that we have been sleeping together. And that meant I would have to find Harry and make sure he understands why I have to tell everyone everything about our relationship. When everything important had been discussed the old man asked how my relationship with Harry was going. Clearly he hadn't heard the rumours about us fighting.

"Fine." I tried to make it sound real, but I couldn't hide how much it hurt.

"Do you have anything you wish to tell me?" he asked softly. Maybe this is why Harry spends time with the old man, because he manages to make him feel welcomed while sucking every little piece of detail out of him.

"I think Harry is a whiny little Gryffindor," I blurted out. "He always manages to make me both angry and confused." Here I stopped myself; I could see he was pushing me to keep talking, but I didn't wish to tell him about my private problems with Harry. I sighed and tried to subtly change the subject from my opinions of his golden boy. "How do you know your feelings are true?" I asked quietly, and he looked confused. "How do you know if what you are feeling towards someone else is real? How can you be sure you like someone? Or love them? I've told Harry that I'm not suited for a relationship but he still won't give it up." I hadn't wanted to tell him my problems with dating but I couldn't hold back my thoughts any longer. What was it with this old man that made me tell him secrets?

"That, my boy, is a tough question. Once, a long time ago, I had the same feelings towards someone. Thinking about it now makes me sad, because we didn't decide to make it work. You think you're not suited for a relationship, while Harry thinks otherwise. What if you two sat down and discussed what you think a relationship is? You might have more in common than you think, or maybe realise you have the wrong image of a relationship."

"So it's my fault?" I asked flatly.

"No, no, no, Blaise," Dumbledore chided through a soft smile. "I'm just saying that you and Harry are still young. You should sit down with him and ask him what he wants out of a relationship, maybe he doesn't request as much as you think." The old man's eyes were twinkling happily and, deciding that there was no point in being rude to him, I merely smiled, thanked him and left.