One wish alone have I

Chapter 17 (part 2)
Azkaban

The night was very dark; the moon was completely hidden by a thick layer of clouds and I felt an imminent rain in the humidity of the air, which was freezing cold at this time of the year. We had attended a gathering of the Order at Grimmauld Place to review our strategy once more. I had barely been able to stop a chuckle when Severus had specified, in his gravest tone, that we had rehearsed battle tactics, counter-spells, and concentration skills most thoroughly. Given the way we had sometimes practised, I was amazed at the way he perfectly kept his self-control despite the memories that I saw flashing in his mind at that moment. He had been the one cleaning the lab for four evenings in a row, during the previous week, until I lost the next bet… to our delight.

The Death Eaters’ meeting took place just before the mission began; it was very similar to the one we had had two weeks ago. Voldemort praised his oldest followers and we reviewed our strategy. Bellatrix was quite anxious about the mission; her husband was imprisoned in Azkaban. She quickly had a word with Severus and me before we left, and asked us to let her free him by herself. I expressed my worries to Severus about her request, thinking she might have planned to escape with her husband, but he assured me that the Lestranges’ allegiance to the Dark Lord had been challenged over and over during the past decades and had always remained strong. We held each other in a particularly close and intimate embrace when he Apparated us to the back store’s dark room that night.

And there I was, perched on a tree near the prison gates, Transfigured into a pigeon again, waiting for Severus to give me the signal. He was hidden, along with all the new followers and Bellatrix, behind the trees that surrounded the Azkaban prison’s high walls. I was nervous and so was he, even if we both showed little of it. Severus had insisted that we sleep in our respective rooms before that night, and he had been rather silent and introverted all day. At least, as I knew him much better by then, and given all the intimacy we had shared, this attitude did not hurt my feelings. I was able to give him exactly what he wanted, which was space when he needed to be alone… and just my calm and comforting presence when he needed me at his side.

At long last, the signal came. Severus warned me of the time by Legilimency and I took flight at once. I furtively tried to find Remus’ presence in the surroundings; I knew that several Order members and Ministry Aurors were hiding in the nearest town, waiting for Tonks to give them the signal once we started taking the prisoners out of their cells. To my satisfaction, I got an ephemeral feel of Remus’ mind; he seemed rather calm and composed. It gave me a nice reassurance that everything might go as smoothly as we had planned, after all.

I silently flew into the prison by a small window near the roof; it had been left open for me. Tonks was standing at the exact spot we had agreed on. I discreetly landed behind her and went back to my cainite form in the darkness of the corner where she was standing. I softly brushed my mind against hers. She was slightly less nervous than I was; her nerves were holding very, very strong. When she felt my presence behind her, she shifted her weight and turned her head to the right a little; she was waiting.

“I swear that it will not hurt you,” I whispered in her mind, more in an attempt to reassure myself than to reassure her. “Are you ready?”

She quickly scratched her back and gave me a thumbs up. Her other hand fumbled in her pocket, touching the charmed parchment that would give Moody the signal to start approaching the prison. I firstly lowered my hood and removed the mask I was wearing. I then stepped forward in a flash, clasped my hand over her mouth and pulled her into the darkness with me. Tilting her head to the side, she offered me a deliciously smooth neck. It had been a while since I had last Kissed a woman; I had almost forgotten the creamy texture of a woman’s neck, its graceful and delicate lines, the absence of or very little amount of duvet on the skin… I almost gave in to the temptation to fully caress and explore Tonks’ beautiful throat (and beautiful it really was), but the tension I felt in her mind brought me back to reality in time. I bewitched her senses and mind with my hypnotic skills and ran a hungry tongue on the side of her neck, pulling the neckline of her robes a little past her shoulder and intertwining my fingers with her flaming red hair.

She sighed when my fangs pierced her tender skin and moaned against my hand when I pressed her in my embrace by putting a comforting hand over hers, on her stomach. Drinking only half a litre of her blood asked for miracles of self-control, but I kept my promise and did not drink more. I was only happy that our death simulation required me to really take my time, as if I were, in fact, drinking her dry; it allowed me to really enjoy her taste. It was wild and vibrant, sizzling with life and recklessness against my tongue, conveying her personality very accurately.

I withdrew my fangs at last and closed the bite wound with two quick licks that made her shiver slightly. She collapsed into my arms as planned and I let her fall onto the floor. I calmly wiped my mouth with a handkerchief, put the mask and hood back in place, and abandoned her there. A surreptitious look over my shoulder reassured me that she was discreetly drinking the Death-simulating potion Severus and I had brewed for her. I found the two corrupt guards who were at the other end of the corridor, further away from the Death Eaters’ cells. One of them reminded me of Valeriu; he was rather young, tall, sturdy, and had blond hair. The other one was much smaller and had a weaker build, but there was something nasty in his glance; it pierced the night between us and constantly threw nervous and paranoiac little looks.

They acknowledged my presence with a prudent nod. I walked forward and bent between their heads.

“I took care of the Order guard,” I whispered. “She is dead; you can check for yourselves. Where should we hide her?”

“Follow me,” said the small guard.

We walked together to the place where Tonks’ corpse-looking body was lying. The potion was working perfectly; she looked convincingly dead. The tall guard pressed two fingers against her neck and sniggered when he saw my bite marks.

“No pulse,” he declared. “Looks like she’s off the twig.”

“Where should we hide her?” I asked.

“Calm down, we’ve all the time we want,” said the tall guard, crouching in front of her. “I wouldn’t mind playing with her a little bit; she’s cute and I bet she won’t fight back…”

“I take one end, you take the other?” suggested the small guard.

“You know, I wonder,” I said, with all the detachment I could put into my tone, “what the Dark Lord would say… or do, if he learned how you delayed the escape by indulging yourselves in low, bestial activities while over twenty-five people were waiting for us to proceed, outside…”

I got the effect I wanted. The tall guard, who had already thrown his cloak over his shoulder and unbuttoned his trousers, put everything back in place and straightened up. The other guard only eyed me very suspiciously, but I assumed it was because of fear rather than doubt.

“From what I know, Misters, the Dark Lord is very generous to those who serve him well. I am sure he would consider giving you… a pleasurable… and ‘living’ reward once his old followers are back at his side.”

My remark seemed to ease the atmosphere a little. The guards took Tonks’ body and carelessly threw her in a broom closet nearby. I winced at the sound her body made when she landed in the closet; she woke up with a few bruises the following morning, indeed. I locked the door myself, using spells that would be breakable from inside, and we walked towards the entrance of the Death Eaters’ aisle.

Three dementors were guarding it; they turned their dark hoods towards us when we arrived at their level but did not make any hostile movement. Two of them slithered away in the direction of the back door and disappeared from our view. The third one simply glided away from the aisle entrance and let me inside. I had barely made a few steps past the door when I heard a man’s voice echoing off the walls in the hall behind me. I froze on the spot.

“Everything all right, Pete?” asked the man.

“Yeah, everything in order…” replied the tall guard with detachment.

“Where are the two other dementors?” he asked.

“Dunno…” he hesitated. “Guess they took their break.”

“Since when do they take breaks, Pete?”

“They don’t,” growled the small guard. “They probably heard something outside and wanted to check what it was.”

“You sure?” asked the man’s voice.

“Yeah! They do that all the time; when they guard this aisle, they’re a bit paranoid,” he replied. “If they’re not back five minutes from now, I’ll go and check.”

“Okay,” conceded the other man. “Let me know when they come back, will you?”

“Yeah, sure,” he retorted, with a voice that certainly lacked the proper convincing enthusiasm.

I heard the man’s footsteps echo further away from us during the minute that followed, and I gradually regained my original calmness. We had agreed that I would wait for Severus and Bellatrix’s arrival before I started casting the counter-spells so the imprisoned Death Eaters would see familiar faces and fully cooperate. The Dark Lord had wished for the most quiet escape feasible. Given the volatile nature of some counter-hexes, I doubted that the other guards’ attention would be held off for long, but wished, nevertheless, to keep them away as long as possible.

At long last, I saw two black silhouettes in the hall in front of the Death Eaters’ aisle. They were not gliding as gracefully as the ones that had left minutes before, but they could easily be mistaken for the same two dementors that had left the aisle before. The small guard let them in with me and then left to reassure the other guard that the dementors were back at their post. I felt Severus’ presence with delight underneath the hooded cloak that covered his whole body and face, and even got a glimpse of his eyes through the black mask he was wearing. They were glimmering with a light I had rarely seen.

Both Severus and Bellatrix nodded to me and we took position in front of the cells. It was impossible to cast a Silencing Charm on the whole aisle; the Azkaban architects had obviously included many anti-charms in the structure of the high-security building. Casting the charm on each cell would not have blocked the racket made by the noisier counter-spells, so we had decided to carefully plan the order in which we unlocked each cell, keeping the less discreet spells for the end. I felt a strange emotion when I saw Severus reach for his mask under his heavy hood and pull it down, following Bellatrix’s example. The wizards in the cells immediately came closer and their faces glowered with recognition and joy when they saw his features. Never before had I so strongly felt that he had been, in the past, and still was in part, one of them.

We all gestured at them to remain very quiet and move to the back of their cells, which they did at once. Bellatrix started the sequence on her husband’s cell; Severus and I did the same on the cells that were in front of us. That part went very smoothly; Macnair had managed to get the two sub-lists of spells that missed and we had everything in hand to open every cell. Once the quieter counter-spells had been thrown, we all took a brief pause and looked at each other. Severus was very calm and composed; Bellatrix was eager to get out. I fully shared her feelings, with the addition of the dread I felt, thinking about the “surprise” that was awaiting us outside.

In the corridor next to the hall, dozens of dementors had gathered and were carefully observing what we were doing. I did not like their presence at all. Other than all the negativity and darkness that emanated from them, I did not like the insistence I felt in the way they stood there watching us. Severus felt my worries and gave me a questioning glance, but I merely nodded in their direction and shrugged my shoulders. A discreet cough from Bellatrix brought us back to our task. On her signal, we started throwing the last spells, which hit the cells’ doors with loud bangs that echoed worrisomely off the hall’s walls. A few dementors moved towards the aisle door and some even glided in; I stayed focused on what we were doing, trying to be as quick as possible.

The imprisoned Death Eaters rushed out of their cells the second the doors were unlocked. Bellatrix’s husband meant to run to her and take her into his arms, but she quickly walked away and ignored him. He seemed disappointed but got the hint and simply merged with the group that was forming in front of the cells. On the other side of the door, in the hall in front of the aisle, the other prison guards started arriving. I heard them shouting indistinct words, and then saw the flashing light of a few defensive spells as the two corrupt guards started fighting them. Bellatrix walked to the middle of the group and took the lead.

“We have to be quick,” she urgently whispered. “Other Death Eaters are waiting outside, along the wall, with broomsticks. They will fly you out of the prison grounds and Apparate you to hiding places that are already prepared. Follow me!”

She decidedly walked towards the aisle’s door, followed by the group, but stopped before she could get out. About ten dementors had glided into the aisle and blocked the passage to the door. Bellatrix straightened up to her full height and walked as close as she dared to one of them.

“We had an agreement,” she said, in an authoritarian tone. “Let us pass.”

The creature did not move; its rattling breath came out steady and regular from underneath its hood. After sensing Bellatrix for a few never-ending seconds, it turned its head to the right and seemed to communicate with its nearest counterpart. It then glided closer to her, who remained exactly where she was, and came only a foot away from her face. I saw one of its bony hands emerge from the large sleeves of its cloak and aim at Bellatrix’s face. It was at that moment she lost control. In a sharp move, she hit the creature’s arm, gave it a firm push in the chest and pointed her wand menacingly at the approximate location of its face.

All the other dementors in the room moved forward very aggressively; the prisoners behind us took many steps back, and a couple of them even ran back into their cells in terror. Severus walked in front of Bellatrix and made her step back and lower her wand.

“Do not provoke them,” he warned, in a very calm voice.

“You saw it! It provoked me!” she argued, pointing at the dementor in question.

“It only wanted you to remove your mask,” I intervened, feeling the creature’s intentions. “They know you.”

“I know them, too,” she hissed. “I have spent quite a few years in their charming company.”

“They have been ordered to look for you and capture you on sight,” I said, choosing my words carefully while trying to express the creature’s intent. “Letting you out with the others is… difficult to do, for them.”

“What! Are you telling me,” sneered a smooth male voice behind me, “that they are having an ethical dilemma all of a sudden?”

“In a way, yes,” I replied, still looking at the dementor who allowed me to communicate with it. “Please… remove your mask.”

“No way. If they think they can give me orders…” she articulated, in a voice that vibrated with a hint of fear.

I stepped forward and removed my mask. The creature’s attitude became a bit more cooperative; its instincts did not react well to people hiding themselves. I tried to transmit our intentions to it and convince it that it was in its best interest to let us pass. The dementors do not possess sophisticated communication skills and, from the vague impressions I felt in that creature’s mind (for indeed it had one), I thought it best to explain things very simply. I highlighted the fact that its master had changed and the people who were their prey in the past were now allies. I also played on the powers and deep understanding this master could give and the better work conditions he offered, which could hardly compare with the way the Ministry treated them. That did little to change its mind, but when I mentioned all the people on whom they would feed during battles, given the Dark Lord’s generosity, it slightly bowed and turned to the others. They glided aside and gave us a clear passage to the door.

I think everybody still felt extremely uncomfortable when we walked among the dark creepy shadows, but nobody was harmed and we all got out. The fight had been brief in the hall; the two corrupt guards were still standing and about four or five wizards were lying on the floor. From what I felt when I walked near them, they were all dead or fatally injured.

“Pete,” I said, “do you expect additional guards to come here?”

“You know, for most birds it’s Peter, but for you Luv, I’m ready to go for Pete,” he commented with a stupid smile. “As you witnessed some time ago, I’m pretty open-minded when it comes to dead lasses, especially when they give little kissies in the neck,” he added, with a meaningful wink and a vulgar click of his tongue that totally disgusted me.

A crisp cracking sound broke the uneasy silence that had fallen into the hall, all of a sudden. With a start, I turned to my left to find the source of the noise… it was Severus’ knuckles! He had his right first clenched and pressed against his left hand; his eyes were fixing the tall guard with such fiery insistence through his mask that it instantly wiped the stupid smile off his face.

“The other guards are in the aisle at the opposite end of the prison,” retorted the small guard. “I don’t know if they had time to give the alarm or not.”

“We don’t have to stay here until we find out,” said one of the prisoners. “Let’s get the hell out of here!”

“Wait a minute,” said Severus, still staring at the tall guard. “Have you retrieved what we requested?”

“Yeah, it’s true, I almost forgot that,” growled the small guard. “They’re in our office; we’ll retrieve them on our way out.”

We all followed the guards in the corridor with the dementors on our heels. Some of the prisoners had a difficult time to walking; their leg muscles had become rather feeble after months of immobilization. We progressed far slower than planned; it allowed me to check for the Order’s presence around the prison. My stomach clenched at once when I explored the surroundings; Remus was there and he was already experiencing a full adrenaline rush. The battle had begun, outside.

I said nothing to the others, of course; I wanted the Order members to benefit from the effect of surprise when we would walk out. The small guard rushed into his office and came out a few seconds later, with a dozen wands in his hands. The prisoners murmured their satisfaction excitedly and almost knocked the guard off his feet when they all swooped down on him to retrieve their own wand. One of them was very long; it caught my attention and I waited to see who would pick it up. It was in fact a cane, made of what looked like high quality ebony: its handle was made of silver and was shaped like a serpent’s head. The wizard who picked it was tall and rather skinny given his months of deprivation. He was as untidy, dirty and shabbily dressed as the others, but I noted a blunt air of superiority in his posture that took him apart from them. I instinctively put a hand on my throat, recognizing the wizard who had nearly strangled me when I delivered Voldemort’s message to him. I caught a glimpse of his blue eyes through the muddy locks of his long hair; they had the firmness and coldness of metal… and looked vaguely familiar to me, though I could not put my finger on the memories they triggered. I also noted how two other wizards immediately walked to him and stood at his side, as if they were waiting for his orders.

When we left, two wands were lying on the floor. I was puzzled at first, and then understood. Two of their brothers had been forbidden to see daylight again, a few months before. Nobody picked them up… nobody made a comment. They just turned away and followed Bellatrix who was heading towards an exit.

Severus and I were about to part from the group and take a right turn to the side door leading to the front of the building when the first noises of the battle that was taking place outside reached us. Bellatrix swore and rushed forward; when she opened the door, a jet of red sparkles zoomed inside. We all ducked and fell onto the floor; the dementors merely parted their group to let the spell hit the wall with a small explosion.

Bellatrix was already fighting outside when the prisoners and the two guards ran through the doorframe and attacked. Severus stayed behind with me in the corridor.

“What do you think we should do?” he asked, as the dementors slowly glided outside.

“The plan involved us escaping on the other side of the building as quickly as possible… he asked us not to participate to the fight,” I argued, remembering the strange expression on Dumbledore’s face as he said it.

“I am not sure that they will be able to manage the situation by themselves out there,” he replied, fortunately not indicating which side he was talking about.

“And it would be incredibly regrettable,” sneered a man’s voice behind us, “if the Dark Lord should learn how two of his followers let their counterparts down and cowardly ran away.”

“What would you call the thing you are doing right now? Courage in battle?” Severus retorted, turning to the tall wizard who was casually leaning a hand on his cane and inspecting the state of his nails on the other.

“I am the one being saved, not the saviour…”

“You can still manage to save yourself, Malfoy!” Severus murmured menacingly.

“This is exactly what I am doing!” the wizard replied, sighing in exasperation and turning his attention away from his nails. “I will certainly not plunge head first into the fight before I can gather enough power and energy. It is too risky right now.”

The two wizards exchanged tensed looks for a few seconds, but Mister Malfoy spoke first.

“Crabbe and Goyle cannot possibly replace me in any task that involves the use of higher forms of intelligence, but as you know, they can become incredibly handy as infantry wizards,” he lazily explained, looking at Severus through half-closed eyelids. “I will never suggest that you should put your disguise in jeopardy by playing the Dark Lord’s soldiers. You and I are not meant for such lower functions. Let her go,” he suggested, pointing at me with a sharp move of his chin, “and stay here with me until the commotion dies down; you can fill me in about the last months’ events.”

“Malfoy, be careful,” Severus warned, in a very low voice. “You do not know whom you are speaking of.”

“I will go,” I suddenly intervened. “Mister Malfoy is right. I should be fighting at the other Death Eaters’ sides. I will be back when the battle subsides.”

And with a reassuring but short glance into Severus’ eyes, I walked straight to the doorframe and stepped outside.

The sight that unfolded in front of my eyes was an impressive one. The dementors had rushed outside in one line and forced the Order and Ministry fighters to retreat to the back of the prison grounds. Remus was bravely standing nose to hood in front of them, feeding his Patronus with repeated incantations in a loud and clear voice. Emmeline was helping him; she attached her own Patronus to Remus’ and together, they protected the others and stopped the dementors from gliding any further. Their Charms were powerfully lightening the dark night around them and everything was bathed in a ghostly silver glow. Moody was on Remus’ other side; he protected them the best he could by deviating the Death Eaters’ spells. I recognized Shacklebolt, standing on the prison’s high wall with two witches and a wizard I did not know. Together, they were stopping the Death Eaters who tried to fly out of the anti-Disapparating zone by broom. From what I saw, they had already captured two prisoners and the witch and wizard who were trying to help them escape; they were securely tied together against the wall.

Arthur, his two sons, Hestia and Sturgis were on the ground, trying to make their spells reach past the dementors’ line and hit the Death Eaters that were standing next to the prison’s wall. The twins threw a few spells at me, but I easily blocked them; they were nasty ones, however. I remember wondering if those spells were really meant for me or if the twins actually thought they finally had the chance to shake their former Potions Master a little. Either way, they did not insist.

A quick look around told me that the Order and Ministry forces were outnumbered. We had underestimated the number of new followers that would be allowed to join the Death Eaters’ effort in that mission and the dementors were clearly an annoyance; they slowed down the progression of the fight considerably. I saw Remus’ Patronus disappear for a split second and reappear again; he was starting to overtax his magical resources. That gave me an idea.

I put a protective charm around myself and tried to enter Remus’ mind. I counted on our countless mental exercises to easily make my presence known to him and indeed, it only took me a couple of minutes to tear a part of his attention away from the fight and redirect it into his mind. I felt at once that he was happy to sense me there; his Patronus became noticeably more intense.

“These dementors have to go away!” I said, in his mind. “What about we join our powers and boost your Patronus? Ask Moody to send a jet of red sparkles if you agree.”

At a distance, I saw Remus turn to Moody and talk to him. Seconds later, a jet of fiery red sparkles flashed in the night above our heads. I did not waste a minute; summoning all my magical and spiritual resources, I sent waves of Cerridwen’s power to Remus through our joined minds. His Patronus first flickered worrisomely and I saw him struggle with the intense vibrations in his wand that spread to his hand and arm. Shortly after, however, the silver light emanating from his wand finally detached itself from it and took the distinct shape of a werewolf, in front of Emmeline’s and Remus’ amazed eyes. The dementors slightly glided back in surprise, but they did not have the time to go far before the silver werewolf swooped down on them, leaping from one dementor to the other and aiming for the dark shadows in their hoods.

We got what we wanted; within minutes, the dementors had retreated to the sides of the prison grounds and did not dare to come any closer. Arthur, his sons and the others did not miss their chance; while Remus kept concentrating to maintain his Patronus in its animal form as long as possible, they immediately ran past him and charged the Death Eaters, who did the same. I admired the lack of any hesitation in their charge; it showed how deeply the Order members were devoted to their cause, and their courage was truly inspiring.

I ran with the Death Eaters, of course, trying to assist Remus the longest that I could. The fight became far more challenging and faster, at that point. Bellatrix was completely furious and fanatic; she attacked everybody in turn, especially Moody, Shacklebolt and a Ministry Auror I did not know. Spells were zooming in all directions; those that came from Death Eaters were far deadlier than the others. Macnair almost exclusively used Unforgivable curses and my heart clenched many times in my chest as I saw the twins duck away from a Killing Curse just in time.

I threw all the spells I could think of. In this case, my natural tendencies to use more defensive than offensive strategies fit very well with the situation. The spells that were thrown at me were as challenging and violent as those that were meant for the others, as there was no way for them to tell Severus, Bellatrix and me apart. Nevertheless, I did not have to attack or capture anyone in particular and my role in the fight was purely sham; it made things easier to manage for me.

The Death Eaters grew more and more impatient as time went by. They had witnessed the capture of their counterparts and did not want to meet the same fate; it had discouraged them from flying their way out. In response, however, they became far more aggressive and furiously determined to reach the prison gates from the ground. Shacklebolt could not avoid a hex completely; it passed very close to his face and left a large scratch on his left cheek. In addition, I heard a menacing roll of thunder and the air became even more charged with humidity and electricity; a big thunderstorm was coming. Shortly after, just as rain began to fall over us, dark shadows started to move in the night, on the right side of the battlefield. When the first lightening bolt tore through the black thickness of the night, I distinctively saw the other prison guards running towards us; they had been alerted by the noise and came as reinforcements. What Bellatrix screamed to the Death Eaters when she saw that almost froze me on spot.

“Kill the werewolf!”

Remus heard it too; his Patronus flickered again and lost its animal form momentarily. Macnair got the hint faster than the others as he had fought Remus in the past, when the first Order was formed. Emmeline and Moody immediately became more alert on each side of Remus and they cast numerous protective charms around him in order to let him fully focus on his Patronus and keep the dementors on each side of the battlefield. I was tempted to add a few charms of my own to the lot, but it was too risky.

My run with the group of Death Eaters had brought me on the right side of the battlefield, not too far from Shacklebolt and the prison gates. I engaged in a duel with Arthur, who began by throwing rather inoffensive spells at me, probably in fear that he had a better chance to actually hit me now that the dementors had retreated and I was closer. I caught a glimpse of a captured prisoner frowning when he heard the nature of Arthur’s spells; I voluntarily aimed a Cruciatus Curse at the latter, just above his left shoulder. It had the desired impact; Arthur was shaken enough by the force of the explosion behind him to start playing harder with me.

Seconds later, I heard Shacklebolt and his colleagues shouting a few warnings from the top of the high wall. Arthur and I stopped fighting at once and looked up, only to powerlessly witness Shacklebolt being hit from behind and falling down the stone wall. He was soon followed by the female Auror at his side. The remaining two Aurors jumped off to protect themselves; the new followers who had been hiding in the woods to Apparate the prisoners to the hiding flats were attacking them from the other side of the wall, and it was too much for them to handle. Unfortunately, two prisoners escaped during the small commotion this attacked provoked: one flew over the wall by broom and the other simply ran through the gates, right behind me. Arthur attempted a Stunning hex, but I was forced to block it, to preserve appearances; I was standing between him and the escaping prisoner, and the captured prisoners were watching us eagerly. I heard two loud cracks as they Disapparated from the other side.

Jets of coloured sparkles zoomed everywhere around me through the heavy rain; a vast majority of them were aimed at Remus. I was still feeding our mental connection as best as I could; his nerves were holding strong, but he was becoming very tense. Moody had wonderful reflexes and successfully deflected the spells away from him, but when the new followers entered the battlefield and started attacking from their side as well, he was forced to let Emmeline protect Remus alone and he added his skills to those of the others standing next to the wall, in an attempt to push the new followers back outside.

Bellatrix was not wasting her time, though; she was still quite close to the prison with many prisoners. When I looked at her, she was covering two brooms over the battlefield and they safely made their way out into the woods. Emmeline tried to take them down as they flew above her head, but Bellatrix’s protective spells were too strong for her and she failed. In horror, I watched, out of the corner of my eye, how a jet of blue light hit Remus’ right hip now that he was left completely unprotected. He was just not fast enough to break his Patronus and block that spell; nobody would have been able to be that quick. I saw and heard him scream in what seemed like excruciating pain while the blue gleam spread to his whole body before he collapsed, fell in the mud, and totally stopped moving. Our mental link was completely broken and the Patronus vanished; the dementors rushed back into the heat of battle at once.

Despite a strong urge to run to Remus and see if he was still alive, I stayed on spot. It was a good move; a split second after he fell, a long jet of white light zoomed barely three feet in front of me. I turned my head and saw a tall hooded figure running towards me. Even without the characteristic billowing movements of his robes, I would have recognized him. Severus progressed towards me as fast as he could, reverberating many spells on the way and casting some. Moody seemed particularly fond of using him as a target; they had to duel for a while before he finally let him get to me. In the meantime, I was kept busy by two prison guards who restlessly tried to hit me with various binding and stunning spells. They were not giving me an easy time; I must say that their training was excellent. I had to use my best reflexes, alternating between fast movements, blocking spells and reverberating charms until they both aimed a powerful hex at me and kept feeding it, pushing with all their power and physical strength on my Shielding Charm. I finally felt Severus’ firm grip on my shoulder and my heart gave a jolt of joy. He helped me fight the two guards, and together we successfully taxed their reflexes enough to Stun them both.

“We have to get away from here!” he said urgently, over the noise and thunder.

“Why? The fight is not over!” I exclaimed, deflecting a spell behind him.

“It will be over soon, look!” he said, pointing to the sky, where I discerned a few brooms in the flash of a lightening. “Those are probably Ministry Aurors who were contacted by the other guards; more will be coming by Floo and they will block our way out from inside the prison. We barely have a few minutes left; we have to go now!”

“Remus is down, Severus!” I said, grabbing his robes. “The dementors will finish him off if he is not already dead!”

“The Order will protect him; they never leave anybody behind,” he said, in a hurried but reassuring tone. “Come now!”

He grabbed my waist and pushed me in front of him. I turned my eyes a last time towards the inanimate body of my friend on the ground; he was covered with mud and I could not see his face. Emmeline was indeed protecting him against the dementors, but he was still not moving. Severus and I made our way back to the castle quite easily; the second charge of the dementors took most of the Order members’ attention. Three more brooms carrying prisoners and new followers zoomed above our heads before we reached the prison door.

When we went through the doorframe, Mister Malfoy was still there. He was eagerly watching the fight, leaning against the wall and jumping aside to avoid a few jinxes.

“What are you still doing here, Malfoy?” Severus exclaimed, when we reached him. “It is time to get a broom and escape; many of the prisoners have flown their way past the walls by now, but reinforcements will arrive soon: the prison guards have raised the alarm.”

“I will not take that kind of risk and end up tied to the wall next to the prison gates,” he sneered, as if Severus had said something particularly stupid. “I am coming with you.”

“What? Are you out of your mind? You cannot come with me, Malfoy, I cannot hide you!” he angrily exclaimed.

“This is not what I am asking,” he calmly replied. “Take me to my manor first, and then to one of the hiding places. I will be very, very generous if you do this,” he added, looking at him with a meaningful glance.

“Why the manor?” Severus snapped.

“This is the last place they will go looking for me at first. You do not expect me to hide in shame dressed like this? There are some of my belongings that I wish to retrieve from the manor…. Besides, I do not even see why we are arguing about this. What would our Master say if he knew you refused to give me your help?” he concluded, with a satisfied smile.

“An Auror is bringing some prisoners back here!” I urged. “We have to hurry!”

“Come along,” he growled, walking towards the side door.

We ran outside by the small door through which Severus and Bellatrix had entered. Fortunately, that side of the prison grounds was totally deserted as planned. Mister Malfoy had recovered a better muscle capacity, but he was still slowing us down and we both had to let him lean on our shoulders to stumble our way to the prison gates, and out of the anti-Disapparating zone. Ministry Aurors were flying above our heads when we stopped running and hid under a large tree.

“I will see you at home,” said Severus, directing it at me.

“Is she not coming with us?” asked Mister Malfoy.

“How many people does it take to escort you home, Malfoy?” he retorted.

“Well, after such a fight, I thought it polite to offer you the comfort of the manor for the time I will stay there…” he briefly explained, while Severus’ eyes looked at me with a strange expression.

I did not have the time to reply; one of the Aurors saw us from the sky and started throwing spells at us. Mister Malfoy passed a hand around my waist and brought me to him in an authoritarian embrace. I tried not to wince at the horrible mix of sweat and body odor that emanated from him as he did. A second later, we all Disapparated in a loud crack.

When I opened my eyes, I understood Severus’ reluctance at once. My mind went blank for a second when the sight of the Malfoy mansion matched the images from the Great Dragon’s visions and the remains I had seen in Arnaud’s memory. The odd feelings I had felt, standing next to this wizard in his cell months before, strangely started to make sense. I was lucky, very lucky that the past months’ events had made me evolve a great deal and achieve a sense of closure about Arnaud’s death. Despite the way my heart clenched with pain and anxiety, I said nothing and calmly broke the wizard’s embrace to step aside. I think I even found the nerve to thank him for the ride.

“Welcome to my home,” he said, extending his cane in front of him and offering me his arm courteously. “If you should be so kind as to step inside with me, I am sure you would like to enjoy some refreshments while I manage to get back like my old self again upstairs.”

“I admit I do need a rest,” I simply said in a flat tone, taking his arm.

My hand barely touched the overused and dirty fabric of his prison uniform and I walked in a very stiff and formal posture at his side. Fortunately, it was Severus who participated the most in the casual conversation Mister Malfoy started about the fight. It seemed to take us ages to get into the manor, but we finally got inside by a discreet door. He led us to a richly decorated living room and finally let me leave his side. Severus kept his mask and hood; I did the same.

Hurried footsteps echoed in the corridor and an average-sized blonde witch appeared in the doorframe. She looked thunderstruck when she saw us and stayed open-mouthed for a few seconds in front of Mister Malfoy. Her features first passed from surprise to disgust, an expression I guessed was rather usual given the deep lines that formed it on her face, but this time, they quickly transformed into an expression of pained joy.

“Lucius!” she exclaimed, running to him and falling into his open arms. “Lucius, I cannot believe it is you! They finally let you out? How come I did not know? How come you did not send me an owl to tell me you would come back tonight? I must look like a homeless Muggle in these robes!” she added, speaking really fast between the passionate kisses she covered his face with.

“Narcissa,” he interrupted silkily, “obviously, they did not let me out; you know I was sentenced for twenty years… I escaped.”

“What?” she exclaimed, in a strangled voice.

“I do not have much time; they will come looking for me here. Come with me upstairs and give orders for my luggage to be prepared. I need to leave as soon as possible.”

“Lucius…” she began, embarrassed, “things have changed since you were imprisoned…”

“Changed? How?” he asked, frowning darkly.

“Do we have to discuss it here, my beloved?” she replied, with a quick side-glance towards Severus and me.

“Of course, of course,” he answered, understanding the hint. “May our guests have some refreshments while I am getting prepared? I will meet you upstairs. If you will excuse me…”

“Yes… obviously. Kreacher!” she called, rather loudly, as Mister Malfoy walked out.

Long minutes later, a very old house-elf walked into the living room by a trap door hidden behind a large potted plant. He knocked his toe quite hard against the massive pot and threw a few insults at it; I think I even heard him mumble something that sounded like “always doing it on purpose” while he waved his fist menacingly at it. He then dragged his feet on the carpet and slowly walked to our hostess, uttering something inaudible under his breath.

“What is Lady Malfoy wanting?” he gruffly asked.

“Serve tea and crumpets to our guest,” she commanded, in the same loud tone, articulating each word. “If you will excuse me as well, I have to see to my husband’s luggage,” she added, bowing her head slightly and rushing upstairs.

The old house-elf disappeared behind the trap door and left us alone at long last. Severus gently took my hand and made me sit next to him on what I recognised as an Avalon-style couch. I said nothing at first and only let my gaze wander around, shutting my mind from my heart by looking at the details of the room extremely attentively. The windows were very high and rather narrow; they reminded me of the Zaharia’s dining room. These windows had long velvet curtains as well, but they were blue and accompanied by white lace ones that were drawn shut. There was no thunderstorm in this part of England; the rain was falling heavily, however, and the wind pushed it against the glass in regular waves. That delicate sound was incredibly soothing for me.

A few frames were hung in the room; most of them were peaceful landscapes or family portraits. I noticed that they had a son; a young boy who looked incredibly like his father was in most of them. A rich Persian carpet covered the hardwood floor and additional Avalon-style furniture completed the room. I had to admit, despite myself, that the Malfoys had a great sense of taste.

“It is not a good idea, Antanasia,” resounded Severus’ cherished voice in my mind.

“What idea?” I asked.

“Trying to find Arnaud’s imprint in the house…” he replied.

“So my impressions were right… he did die in here.”

“I am afraid he did…” he softly said.

“And that is why you did not want me to come here?”

“Exactly.”

“Thank you… for trying,” I replied, squeezing his hand in mine and pressing my shoulder against his next to me.

Kreacher came back with a platter charged with a teapot, cups, and crumpets. He served us a cup with very shaky hands that made us seriously worry about his capacity to give them to us without spilling their hot contents over our robes. He managed to do it right, contrary to our expectations, and left the room without a word… without any clear word, at least. Once he was gone, Severus simply poured the content of his cup back into the teapot and did the same with mine. He did not touch the crumpets, obviously.

“You do not trust Mister Malfoy?” I asked, a bit puzzled by his attitude.

“It is the house-elf that I do not trust… he was at Black’s service in Grimmauld Place before he died… I am not surprised to find him here; he was a supporter of the Death Eaters’ cause, just like Black’s mother was. And I would not be surprised, despite the charms that bind him to secrecy, to find something harmful in my tea if he is the one serving it to me.”

“Does he know it is you behind the mask?”

“I prefer not to take chances…” he explained. “But enough about that useless thing… we might not be able to communicate like this for long… are you ok?”

“Yes. Do not worry about me, Severus. I am fine.”

“Do you think you can stand to stay here a little longer?”

“I will do my best. My returning to Hogwarts before he comes back could be misinterpreted….”

“Malfoy cannot linger here for too long; the Aurors will be after him once the fight in Azkaban is over.”

“From the look on his wife’s face when she left, I bet he will be slightly delayed, on the contrary…” I ironically added.

Severus merely rolled his eyes and sighed irritably, tapping a finger against his thigh. I took his hand in mine and simply caressed it, very discreetly, under his cloak. Not even twenty minutes later, my doubts were confirmed. A woman’s wild, high-pitched and rhythmic screams of pleasure echoed upstairs; from the clarity in which her voice reached us, I deduced that they had not even taken the time to close the door of the room they were in. Severus sighed again and leaned back in his seat, crossing his arms and legs and resting his head against the back of the couch. Needless to say that neither of us were in the mood for casual talk and we remained completely silent, having nothing better to do than watching the old grandfather clock in the living room and counting the minutes. Seven passed before Mrs Malfoy’s screams reached higher tones and finally ended in a strangled sob.

Mister Malfoy walked through the living room door fifteen minutes later, with a definite spring in his step and a renewed sparkle of alertness in his glance. All the muscles of my body tensed at once when I recognised, at last, the face my late husband had last seen before his cruel death: a vast forehead, a straight nose over thin lips that stretched in a cold and condescending smile, but most importantly, long straight blond hair that was tied in a queue and a pair of piercing and vile blue eyes.

“So it was really you…” I thought, despite myself.

Both of Severus’ fists clutched tensely against his ribcage when he felt that in my mind.

The worst part of all this is that Mister Malfoy did look incredibly elegant, handsome and noble with his neat hairdo, his freshly shaven face, and his satisfied expression. He would have driven Mara completely wild with his dark silk shirt, his richly embroidered burgundy satin vest, his black coat and the long cane he still carried in his right hand, of course. But what I rather saw (or simply preferred to keep in mind) was the filthy and dirty prisoner we had rescued barely an hour before; I even caught a glimpse of him as Mister Malfoy grabbed a crumpet and hungrily shove it into his mouth.

“From what we heard, I understand that you are done with all the things you wanted to do here, Malfoy?” Severus asked, impatiently.

“Yes, yes… Narcissa is preparing my luggage; she will be downstairs in a couple of minutes,” he lazily replied. “I am sorry if the noise incommoded you… I am still waiting for the day she will finally instill some of her fervour into actual skill…” he added, in a very blasé tone that shocked me by its complete lack of reserve.

An uneasy silence followed, but Mrs Malfoy did not reappear.

“Narcissa told me that Draco is getting good grades at school… how is he doing in your lessons?” he asked, while I felt Severus’ fists clench even tighter.

“Very well; he should be ready for his N.E.W.T. next year,” murmured Severus, with a complete lack of enthusiasm.

“Do not hesitate to be a little harsh with the boy if he loosens up, he needs a tight structure…”

“I will remember that…” he simply replied.

Mrs Malfoy came back to us and put her husband’s luggage bag on the floor. She helped him put on an elegant cloak with a fur collar and handed him a pair of black leather gloves. I noticed with a certain pain how her chin was trembling while discreet tears flowed from her eyes, how loving each of her gestures was… and how little he seemed to care. When we got up and walked next to them, she surprised us by falling at our feet and clinging desperately to our pants. We nearly fell on the floor while taking a step back from her hysterical grip.

“Lucius told me how you helped him escape!” she sobbed, looking up at us. “Thank you! Thank you so much for what you did! He did not deserve to be in prison for that long, he did not deserve it! We… we are not ungrateful people; believe me, we will find a way to thank you for what you did! Tell me your price and I shall honour the debt we have towards you!”

“There, there, Narcissa, please control yourself; you are offering a most pitiful spectacle to our guests,” interrupted her husband, very condescendingly. “They were merely doing their duty; I am sure that serving our Master was a reward in itself! Was it not?” he asked me with a smile.

“Of course it was,” I articulated, crouching in front of the sobbing woman who was still at our feet and helping her get up. “There is no need to give us any reward, believe me…”

“Thank you!” she said, flinging her arms around my neck and pressing me against her in a tight embrace.

That was clearly too much for me to endure; I thought I was going to be sick.

“Narcissa, we have to go now,” urged her husband.

“Oh, when are you going to come back, Lucius?” she exclaimed, running to his arms and clinging to his cloak. “When will I see you again?”

“I do not know, really,” he said, in a rather cold tone.

“I love you! I love you so much, Lucius! And your son loves you, too! We miss you so much!” she whined, grabbing as many kisses as she could from his ungrateful lips.

“I really have to go now, Narcissa. I will try to send an owl whenever I can, ok?”

“Ok,” she said, finally letting go of his clothes. “I think of you every day, my love!”

“I know… goodbye, my dear,” he replied, leaving a last kiss on her forehead.

He grabbed his luggage bag and we followed him to a narrow staircase that led us to the backyard.

“I am sorry for the emotional display you have witnessed,” he said, once we were outside. “Oh, well! I guess being a Death Eater’s wife is not easy every day…” he casually commented, throwing the topic away with a careless wave of his hand.

Neither of us said anything. We Disapparated to the small flat the new followers had prepared for him; it was in a seedy quarter in Dublin. Once he was installed, with two other escaped prisoners who looked rather astonished (and furious) at his change of appearance, we Apparated back to Hogsmeade and took our place on Severus’ broomstick.

“You were brilliant out there, by the way…” he said, caressing my hand over his stomach while we flew over the school grounds.

“Oh, really? When?” I asked, a bit puzzled.

“On the battlefield, when you fought those two guards…. And I saw what you did with Lupin’s Patronus… that was quite a nice trick of Legilimency, I must say.”

“Thank you,” I replied, burying my nose in the comforting warmth of his cloak that was impregnated with his smell. “Do you think he is ok?”

“I do not know, Antanasia… we will go straight to Dumbledore after we arrive.”

He was waiting for us in his office, obviously. The news he had received so far was mitigated. Remus had been brought straight to St Mungo’s hospital; he was in a critical state and was still unconscious. Dumbledore assured me that it was no use for me to go there before he regained consciousness; the rest of the night would be decisive for him. Shacklebolt and the other two Aurors suffered from a good Stun; Arthur woke them up once the battle subsided. George Weasley had been severely injured as well, but he had been able to get out of the hospital after his injuries were treated and Fred was taking care of him in their London flat, along with their mother, of course. Five of the twelve prisoners had managed to escape; the rest had been captured by Aurors and Order members, and seven new followers had been added to the lot. Tonks had been able to free herself from her closet and fell directly into Moody’s arms, who was trying to unlock the closet door from the other side. Albus congratulated and thanked us for our valuable help and said that, overall, the Azkaban operation had turned out quite the way we wanted.

Once we were back into the dungeons, Severus followed me to my room and offered me a glass of Leukoscotch, which I gladly accepted. He briefly retrieved his Firewhisky from his office through the Floo network and we sat in silence for a few minutes in front of a warm fire.

“Are you going to talk about it or not?” he finally asked, breaking the silence between us.

“Talk about what?”

“About what you realised tonight…”

“And what would that be? Lots of things happened tonight…”

“Antanasia,” he said, frowning in disappointment. “Tonight, you saved the wizard who… well… there is no nice way to put it. Surely it affects you in some way!”

“It was seventeen years ago, Severus… time has passed, you know… afterlife must go on,” I replied, looking at my glass.

“It does not lessen your loss…” he commented.

“From what I have seen in Arnaud’s memories, that wizard… that beast has tortured and killed more than once during his service with Voldemort. I am certainly not the only one grieving a loved one because of him.”

“Still… he was your husband…”

“Look! I am fine, ok? Stop insisting; it is like you want me to be upset!” I snapped, waving my arms impatiently.

“I do not want you to be upset, Antanasia… I know you are,” he said, getting to his feet.

He finished his glass in one long sip but did not come to me. Instead, he removed his frock coat and put it on the back of his armchair. I looked at his large shoulders as he slid the coat off his arms, turned to me, and started unbuttoning his shirt. That sight was becoming familiar and vanished my anger almost completely. I loved looking at him removing a few of the protective layers he always wrapped around himself. I wished, as I saw him neatly drape his shirt and tie on the back of his armchair, to see those familiar gestures become a part of my nightly routine. He then sat on the chair and bent forward to remove his boots and socks; his trousers and underpants met the same fate shortly after.

Without saying a word, he walked past me, went up the pedestal stairs and sat on the edge of the coffin. I noted how he did not clumsily (and very impolitely) walk into it, like most humans do. Leaning against the edge, he first glided inside, left hip first, and then only his legs and feet followed. He looked like he had done it all his life; I was speechless.

“Will you keep looking at me open-mouthed like that for long or will you join me?”

“You really want to sleep in there, Severus?” I asked, incredulously.

“I want to sleep with you tonight… we both need a rest before tomorrow; we are both teaching, if I remember correctly… and you need to rest in your coffin to replenish your forces. With the news Dumbledore told us, you do realise that tomorrow might be a very hard day…”

“Tomorrow might be what makes me taste tonight so intensely,” I replied, smiling tenderly at him.

“Then come here…” he said, gesturing to the space next to him. “There is plenty of room for both of us; all we have to do is to keep the lid slightly open, if you do not mind.”

“Of course not…”

I rose from my seat and got completely undressed. I wanted to feel Severus’ skin against mine without any barrier between us. He welcomed me into his arms and I curled up against the warmth of his body, putting both of my hands against the smooth hair of his chest as he pressed me in his embrace.

“It is not that I do not want to talk to you about it,” I finally admitted, finding a meaning to the mixed emotions I felt. “I did not react as strongly as I thought I would… it was painful to be there, of course… and even more painful to be thanked so profusely for something I never thought I would do one night…. But as I said, time has passed… and recent events healed many wounds, you know… I feel my loss less painfully now.”

“Then I guess it is like you said: afterlife must go on,” he whispered, leaning his forehead against mine and stroking my back very tenderly. “And we are both here together, in one piece…”

“You are right… and I do appreciate it…” I murmured, cuddling against him even closer before we both fell asleep.

~*~

AUTHOR’S NOTES
I hope you are enjoying the story! Reviews are always appreciated! :o) Just so you know... I will be away on vacation/convention for the next two weeks or so. My laptop is coming with me; I will try to write as much as I can while I am there, and even post chapters if I can (chapter 18 is in editing right now). However, given that situation, and the delays in the queue sometimes, please be patient! :o)