Strong Enough
folder
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Snape/Hermione
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
34
Views:
8,844
Reviews:
324
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Snape/Hermione
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
34
Views:
8,844
Reviews:
324
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Ch 22 Silent night
CH 22 SILENT NIGHT
Big kisses to Zephyr, I owe you big time!!
Thanks at the bottom
She owns em, I’m just playing!!
“Silent night,
Holy night,
All is calm,
All is bright”
- Silent night, Various
CH 22 SILENT NIGHT
\"Silent night,
Holy night,
All is calm,
All is bright\"
- Silent night, various
Severus walked Hermione to her rooms and as they reached her door they both stopped. Knowing that they needed some time apart to think, but neither actually wanting to go.
\"Do you want to come in for a drink,\" said Hermione, resignedly.
\"Is that wise?\" said Severus \"It’s Christmas eve, it’s after curfew, we should both be patrolling.\"
\"Screw wise, my team is patrolling tonight, and I’m sure that the students will be glad of a night off from the evil professor.\"
He raised an eyebrow. ”Alright, let me put it more bluntly… Is it a good idea for us to be together so soon after what we discussed. Do you not think we need some time to adjust to this?\"
\"I’m not asking you to come in and marry me Severus,\" she said exasperatedly, \"it is, as you pointed out, Christmas Eve. I am going into my rooms, to get completely shit-faced. If you want to join me, I will be glad of the company, if you don’t, that’s fine too. I wish you a merry Christmas and will see you in the morning.\" And with that she took the wards down to her rooms and stepped inside, leaving them down in an open invitation.
Severus battled internally for about thirty seconds and then followed her inside.
~*~*~*~
He walked into the room and straight into Hermione. She was just standing just inside the doorway of the room staring around in a state of shock.
\"Hermione, are you expecting company, because if so I think I should leave you both to it?\"
Said Severus, smirking.
\"What?\" She said, without turning around still staring around unbelievably.
\"It is fine, I completely understand. You are having a secret affair with Father Christmas, or one of his elves,” he snorted trying hard to keep a straight face.
She turned to him, hands on hips and face like thunder. \"Unless you want to spend Christmas in the infirmary, I suggest you keep your smart comments to yourself, Severus.\"
\"Oh come on Hermione, it looks like a muggle department store grotto in here\"
The room was hardly recognizable as her sparse living quarters. There were fairy lights draped over every available surface, a huge Christmas tree had been erected in the corner of the room, there were icicles, baubles, tinsel and snow, over everything and the whole room was red, silver, gold and green.
\"I don’t even want to know how you know about department store grottos, but since you ask, I didn‘t do this.\"
Severus was still trying hard not to laugh, when he suddenly thought that maybe this was one of Dumbledore’s Christmas ‘treats’, he frowned. \"I am just going to check my rooms, Hermione,” he said turning towards the door.
\"It’s just mine Severus,\" she said sadly.
He turned back at the tone of her voice \"How do you know that?\"
\"Because it’s been the same every Christmas since my parents died. It’s meant to cheer me up,\" she said, her voice catching.
\"Dumbledore?\" he asked coming back into the room and slowly approaching her.
\"No,\" she said shaking her head. \"Dobby. He must have told the other elves to carry it on if anything happened.\" She whispered.
Severus looked at her sadly. He had forgotten about her crusades for elf rights and how fond of the strange little house elf she and her friends had become in their years at school. Dobby had been tricked out of the school earlier that year, believing the trio to be in trouble. He was tortured for information by the deatheaters until they finally killed him, when he wouldn‘t tell them anything.
A sob escaped her lips and she put a fist to her mouth to stop from screaming. She couldn’t stop the pain tearing through her body. She couldn’t take anymore. She ran through the room tearing down the decorations and trashing them.
Severus just stood there not knowing what to do. He did not want to interfere as she obviously needed to do this, but he was afraid that she was going to hurt herself.
She was in a blind rage, seeing red. She knocked over the tree and began blasting things with her wand, the glass baubles shattering into a thousand pieces and cutting her face and arms.
Severus came over and placed his hands on her shoulders, to try and calm her down. She spun around and blasted him across the room, dropping her wand, picking up a handful of baubles and throwing them at him as hard as she could.
Severus was slumped on the floor, desperately trying to fend off the glass balls as they smashed around him. Suddenly one hit him in the face and shattered. His face and robes instantly felt warm and sticky and he knew he was bleeding.
He looked up at her; she was still destroying everything in sight and was bleeding quite heavily herself. He had to stop her.
\"Hermione, that is ENOUGH!\" he bellowed at her, in his best potions master voice, ducking out of the way of another flying bauble.
She snapped out of her trance like state and fixed him with her red-rimmed eyes. Her make-up charm had been weakened by her emotional state and was running down her face, mixing with the blood from the hundreds of tiny little cuts on her face.
\"You!\" She said, spitting the word like it was poisonous. \"This is all your fault. Why Severus? Why couldn’t you save them? Any of them… Why did you always find out so late? If you had just found out earlier, then they would still be alive today.\" She was breathing hard and trying to hang on to reality.
Severus was numb. He had so much blood on his hands already. After what she had just said to him, he felt like he was suffocating in guilt. He was battling internally. Half of him was saying ‘get the hell away from this crazy bitch, you don’t need this’ and the other half was saying ‘don’t walk out on her now, here is someone who may actually need you’. He took a deep breath and decided that he wouldn’t let her do this. Not after what they had just said to each other outside.
\"I said, that is enough.\"
\"Enough, you fucking bastard, I’ll tell you about enough. I have had enough. I can’t take it anymore. I cannot live every day with this kind of pain, it is just too much for me,\" she was hysterical, sobbing openly, \"and it’s all your fault,\" she sank to the floor, her voice weak and defeated, still sobbing, \"and I hate you, I really hate you.\"
Severus couldn’t bear to see this strong woman reduced to a wreck. He crawled over to where she was laying in a heap, ignoring the pain in his hands and knees, as he leant on broken glass.
He pulled her up to a sitting position and took her chin in his hands, forcing her to look up at him
\"Hermione… Hermione, look at me. Is it all my fault?\"
\"Yes,” she cried, trying to pull away.
\"Is it?\" He said roughly.
\"Yes,\" she said through sobs.
\"Is it my fault that your parents are dead, that Dobby is dead, that Neville Longbottom and his grandmother are dead? That Percy Weasley and Penelope Clearwater are dead? Is it Hermione? Am I to blame?\" He couldn’t go on, he was desperately trying to hold back his own tears of despair. He remembered every single student and their families, that Voldemort and his army had killed, and every night he lay awake trying to think of a way he could have stopped it.
\"Answer me, dammit!\" He demanded \"Is. It. My. Fault?\"
\"No!\" She finally cried out, collapsing into his arms, \"It is not your fault!\"
Severus let his own tears fall, as he held her and let her cry, smoothing her hair out and trying to comfort her.
~*~*~
Hermione awoke to find herself wrapped up in a mixture of black robes and strong arms. She looked around and realized that she was lying on the floor of what were once her rooms and that now looked like Christmas had gotten into a fight with Halloween and lost.
She tried to move but the arms holding her tightened. She glanced over and saw Severus lying next to her, sound asleep. She gently moved his arms and stood up, looking at her watch, 9.05. She looked out of the magical dungeon window and saw that it was dark. \"Oh well, that’s Christmas gone.\"
She felt like hell as she slowly made her way to the bathroom. She turned the light on and peered at herself in the mirror, wishing she hadn’t. Her face and eyes were swollen from crying, her cuts had closed up, and scabbed, some of them still with glass in them and her nose was red.
\"Nice work Rudolf,\" she said bitterly to her reflection, as she pinned her hair up and turned the shower on.
Severus woke up to find himself alone on Hermione’s floor. He sat up and his head instantly began to throb. He went to put his hand up to it and felt something sticking out of his hand. He winced as he pulled out the long sliver of glass, got up and went in search of Hermione.
The hot water felt good on her face and body. She had managed to get all the glass out and was just standing under the spray, waiting for it to work its magic and make everything feel better.
\"Hermione?\"
She heard him enter the bathroom, and remembered all the terrible things she had said to him before. (He didn’t deserve them and you know it) She thought.
She stuck her head around the shower door. \"I’m here.\" She said, the words dying on her lips as she saw what she had done to him again.
\"I should go.\" He said, turning to leave
\"Stay,\" she said firmly, and then more softly, \"Please?\" She opened the shower door a little wider in invitation.
They looked at each other for a minute, he looked away, turned and walked out of the room.
Dum Dum Duuummm!!
Ladies, Here you go:
Estrilda : Oh come on mate, I would hardly call him sappy!! You’ll just have to trust that I am to evil to let them be happy for long, Oops, have I said too much!!
Deb : I’m so glad you liked it. I always worry about readers like you, Red, Ness, Cookie, Estrilda and MissM, because you read and review so faithfully and I want you all to enjoy it so much! I will tell the Hermione/Lucius tale but not in this story.
Deblovesdragon : Thank you so much. I’m not so good at the lovey dovey stuff as you can probably tell, I much prefer the fighting and arguing, so I am really pleased that you enjoyed it!
Red writing hood : Red, my love, you’ve made my day. I’m touched *sniff*
Nesscafe : I will I tell you!!. You better start delivering missy or else!! I know what you mean about betas though. I honestly don’t know what I would do without Zephyr. I send the chapters of as a neurotic wreck and when I get them back I’m cool, calm and collected!!
Cookie : I knew I wanted a jealous Sev but like you said, very hard to portray. I’m glad you like him. As for their ‘relationship’ you’ll just have to wait and see *smirks*
PotionsMistressM : Bucket of decaf for MissM over there *grins* On second thoughts, I love it when you are excited (that sounded better in my head!!) I am so glad you liked it. As for the writers block, well from chapter 28 onwards I’m channelling Zephyr, She rocks, as do you, my love xx
NAT Flores : Welcome, and thank you very much!!
Well ladies, to quote the late, great Freddie Mercury, ‘Another one bites the dust’
Since my brainstorming session with Zephyr the other day, I’ve been bitten left right and centre by those pesky plot bunnies, and am now writing another three stories on top of this one so forgive me if I am a little slow in updating, Don’t flame me purrlleeaassee!! If I don’t carry on writing them, I’ll forget what they were about, but I promise that I will continue with the epic that is ‘Strong enough’ I just had a great idea for chapter 29 while I was dyeing my hair? Go figure!!
Kisses
GrrArrg
P.S. In case anyone is at all interested. I have had my fifth tattoo done. It is a formation of four feathers in all different colours on my left thigh and it’s beautiful (to me anyway!) not to mention bloody painful!!
Big kisses to Zephyr, I owe you big time!!
Thanks at the bottom
She owns em, I’m just playing!!
“Silent night,
Holy night,
All is calm,
All is bright”
- Silent night, Various
CH 22 SILENT NIGHT
\"Silent night,
Holy night,
All is calm,
All is bright\"
- Silent night, various
Severus walked Hermione to her rooms and as they reached her door they both stopped. Knowing that they needed some time apart to think, but neither actually wanting to go.
\"Do you want to come in for a drink,\" said Hermione, resignedly.
\"Is that wise?\" said Severus \"It’s Christmas eve, it’s after curfew, we should both be patrolling.\"
\"Screw wise, my team is patrolling tonight, and I’m sure that the students will be glad of a night off from the evil professor.\"
He raised an eyebrow. ”Alright, let me put it more bluntly… Is it a good idea for us to be together so soon after what we discussed. Do you not think we need some time to adjust to this?\"
\"I’m not asking you to come in and marry me Severus,\" she said exasperatedly, \"it is, as you pointed out, Christmas Eve. I am going into my rooms, to get completely shit-faced. If you want to join me, I will be glad of the company, if you don’t, that’s fine too. I wish you a merry Christmas and will see you in the morning.\" And with that she took the wards down to her rooms and stepped inside, leaving them down in an open invitation.
Severus battled internally for about thirty seconds and then followed her inside.
~*~*~*~
He walked into the room and straight into Hermione. She was just standing just inside the doorway of the room staring around in a state of shock.
\"Hermione, are you expecting company, because if so I think I should leave you both to it?\"
Said Severus, smirking.
\"What?\" She said, without turning around still staring around unbelievably.
\"It is fine, I completely understand. You are having a secret affair with Father Christmas, or one of his elves,” he snorted trying hard to keep a straight face.
She turned to him, hands on hips and face like thunder. \"Unless you want to spend Christmas in the infirmary, I suggest you keep your smart comments to yourself, Severus.\"
\"Oh come on Hermione, it looks like a muggle department store grotto in here\"
The room was hardly recognizable as her sparse living quarters. There were fairy lights draped over every available surface, a huge Christmas tree had been erected in the corner of the room, there were icicles, baubles, tinsel and snow, over everything and the whole room was red, silver, gold and green.
\"I don’t even want to know how you know about department store grottos, but since you ask, I didn‘t do this.\"
Severus was still trying hard not to laugh, when he suddenly thought that maybe this was one of Dumbledore’s Christmas ‘treats’, he frowned. \"I am just going to check my rooms, Hermione,” he said turning towards the door.
\"It’s just mine Severus,\" she said sadly.
He turned back at the tone of her voice \"How do you know that?\"
\"Because it’s been the same every Christmas since my parents died. It’s meant to cheer me up,\" she said, her voice catching.
\"Dumbledore?\" he asked coming back into the room and slowly approaching her.
\"No,\" she said shaking her head. \"Dobby. He must have told the other elves to carry it on if anything happened.\" She whispered.
Severus looked at her sadly. He had forgotten about her crusades for elf rights and how fond of the strange little house elf she and her friends had become in their years at school. Dobby had been tricked out of the school earlier that year, believing the trio to be in trouble. He was tortured for information by the deatheaters until they finally killed him, when he wouldn‘t tell them anything.
A sob escaped her lips and she put a fist to her mouth to stop from screaming. She couldn’t stop the pain tearing through her body. She couldn’t take anymore. She ran through the room tearing down the decorations and trashing them.
Severus just stood there not knowing what to do. He did not want to interfere as she obviously needed to do this, but he was afraid that she was going to hurt herself.
She was in a blind rage, seeing red. She knocked over the tree and began blasting things with her wand, the glass baubles shattering into a thousand pieces and cutting her face and arms.
Severus came over and placed his hands on her shoulders, to try and calm her down. She spun around and blasted him across the room, dropping her wand, picking up a handful of baubles and throwing them at him as hard as she could.
Severus was slumped on the floor, desperately trying to fend off the glass balls as they smashed around him. Suddenly one hit him in the face and shattered. His face and robes instantly felt warm and sticky and he knew he was bleeding.
He looked up at her; she was still destroying everything in sight and was bleeding quite heavily herself. He had to stop her.
\"Hermione, that is ENOUGH!\" he bellowed at her, in his best potions master voice, ducking out of the way of another flying bauble.
She snapped out of her trance like state and fixed him with her red-rimmed eyes. Her make-up charm had been weakened by her emotional state and was running down her face, mixing with the blood from the hundreds of tiny little cuts on her face.
\"You!\" She said, spitting the word like it was poisonous. \"This is all your fault. Why Severus? Why couldn’t you save them? Any of them… Why did you always find out so late? If you had just found out earlier, then they would still be alive today.\" She was breathing hard and trying to hang on to reality.
Severus was numb. He had so much blood on his hands already. After what she had just said to him, he felt like he was suffocating in guilt. He was battling internally. Half of him was saying ‘get the hell away from this crazy bitch, you don’t need this’ and the other half was saying ‘don’t walk out on her now, here is someone who may actually need you’. He took a deep breath and decided that he wouldn’t let her do this. Not after what they had just said to each other outside.
\"I said, that is enough.\"
\"Enough, you fucking bastard, I’ll tell you about enough. I have had enough. I can’t take it anymore. I cannot live every day with this kind of pain, it is just too much for me,\" she was hysterical, sobbing openly, \"and it’s all your fault,\" she sank to the floor, her voice weak and defeated, still sobbing, \"and I hate you, I really hate you.\"
Severus couldn’t bear to see this strong woman reduced to a wreck. He crawled over to where she was laying in a heap, ignoring the pain in his hands and knees, as he leant on broken glass.
He pulled her up to a sitting position and took her chin in his hands, forcing her to look up at him
\"Hermione… Hermione, look at me. Is it all my fault?\"
\"Yes,” she cried, trying to pull away.
\"Is it?\" He said roughly.
\"Yes,\" she said through sobs.
\"Is it my fault that your parents are dead, that Dobby is dead, that Neville Longbottom and his grandmother are dead? That Percy Weasley and Penelope Clearwater are dead? Is it Hermione? Am I to blame?\" He couldn’t go on, he was desperately trying to hold back his own tears of despair. He remembered every single student and their families, that Voldemort and his army had killed, and every night he lay awake trying to think of a way he could have stopped it.
\"Answer me, dammit!\" He demanded \"Is. It. My. Fault?\"
\"No!\" She finally cried out, collapsing into his arms, \"It is not your fault!\"
Severus let his own tears fall, as he held her and let her cry, smoothing her hair out and trying to comfort her.
~*~*~
Hermione awoke to find herself wrapped up in a mixture of black robes and strong arms. She looked around and realized that she was lying on the floor of what were once her rooms and that now looked like Christmas had gotten into a fight with Halloween and lost.
She tried to move but the arms holding her tightened. She glanced over and saw Severus lying next to her, sound asleep. She gently moved his arms and stood up, looking at her watch, 9.05. She looked out of the magical dungeon window and saw that it was dark. \"Oh well, that’s Christmas gone.\"
She felt like hell as she slowly made her way to the bathroom. She turned the light on and peered at herself in the mirror, wishing she hadn’t. Her face and eyes were swollen from crying, her cuts had closed up, and scabbed, some of them still with glass in them and her nose was red.
\"Nice work Rudolf,\" she said bitterly to her reflection, as she pinned her hair up and turned the shower on.
Severus woke up to find himself alone on Hermione’s floor. He sat up and his head instantly began to throb. He went to put his hand up to it and felt something sticking out of his hand. He winced as he pulled out the long sliver of glass, got up and went in search of Hermione.
The hot water felt good on her face and body. She had managed to get all the glass out and was just standing under the spray, waiting for it to work its magic and make everything feel better.
\"Hermione?\"
She heard him enter the bathroom, and remembered all the terrible things she had said to him before. (He didn’t deserve them and you know it) She thought.
She stuck her head around the shower door. \"I’m here.\" She said, the words dying on her lips as she saw what she had done to him again.
\"I should go.\" He said, turning to leave
\"Stay,\" she said firmly, and then more softly, \"Please?\" She opened the shower door a little wider in invitation.
They looked at each other for a minute, he looked away, turned and walked out of the room.
Dum Dum Duuummm!!
Ladies, Here you go:
Estrilda : Oh come on mate, I would hardly call him sappy!! You’ll just have to trust that I am to evil to let them be happy for long, Oops, have I said too much!!
Deb : I’m so glad you liked it. I always worry about readers like you, Red, Ness, Cookie, Estrilda and MissM, because you read and review so faithfully and I want you all to enjoy it so much! I will tell the Hermione/Lucius tale but not in this story.
Deblovesdragon : Thank you so much. I’m not so good at the lovey dovey stuff as you can probably tell, I much prefer the fighting and arguing, so I am really pleased that you enjoyed it!
Red writing hood : Red, my love, you’ve made my day. I’m touched *sniff*
Nesscafe : I will I tell you!!. You better start delivering missy or else!! I know what you mean about betas though. I honestly don’t know what I would do without Zephyr. I send the chapters of as a neurotic wreck and when I get them back I’m cool, calm and collected!!
Cookie : I knew I wanted a jealous Sev but like you said, very hard to portray. I’m glad you like him. As for their ‘relationship’ you’ll just have to wait and see *smirks*
PotionsMistressM : Bucket of decaf for MissM over there *grins* On second thoughts, I love it when you are excited (that sounded better in my head!!) I am so glad you liked it. As for the writers block, well from chapter 28 onwards I’m channelling Zephyr, She rocks, as do you, my love xx
NAT Flores : Welcome, and thank you very much!!
Well ladies, to quote the late, great Freddie Mercury, ‘Another one bites the dust’
Since my brainstorming session with Zephyr the other day, I’ve been bitten left right and centre by those pesky plot bunnies, and am now writing another three stories on top of this one so forgive me if I am a little slow in updating, Don’t flame me purrlleeaassee!! If I don’t carry on writing them, I’ll forget what they were about, but I promise that I will continue with the epic that is ‘Strong enough’ I just had a great idea for chapter 29 while I was dyeing my hair? Go figure!!
Kisses
GrrArrg
P.S. In case anyone is at all interested. I have had my fifth tattoo done. It is a formation of four feathers in all different colours on my left thigh and it’s beautiful (to me anyway!) not to mention bloody painful!!