Dancing With Dragons

Thank you for all the reviews- I know my editing skill are lacking and it know at times it can hurt. I am working on getting someone but until than all I can do is apologize. I do have some idea of where this is going and I'd like to see it past the end of Hogwarts...ooo! So no ending to soon but dont worry i am one of those people who see things through so it will have an ending.

Chapter 23 (I believe): Things you Can't Take Back are Such a Bitch
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There was a horrible silence that morphed time for Hermione and suddenly Snape said, “I am sorry Mr. Malfoy can you turn and say that so everyone can hear you. To make it official.” Malfoy turned so that he was facing the whole room. His face gave nothing away.

She clenched her fits and Lavender grabbed one of her hands and squeezed. Malfoy had saved her before surly he could think of something good this time. Surly he could out run this. Right? But how? Malfoy opened his mouth and looked her in the eyes.
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Her world spun. She wasn’t seeing clearly as her breath became labored and she felt hot all over. “What!?”

“I said my vote is no Granger. I said no.” That’s what she thought he said. She took a step towards him but stumbled. Lavender tried to grab her but she pushed her away, looking up into the girl eyes all she could think of was all the broken promises and dreams.

“Oh my god,” She started to fall to her knees but Tom grabbed her. She tried to push away again but he was stronger.

“Strong Hermione. Let me help you with this. Don’t let them see how much this means to you,” Tom whispered in her ear as he pulled her up. She looked up at the table then. Snape looked stony like Malfoy, the Carrows smiled wickedly, and Amycus winked. She looked then to the professor who had tried to save her. Sprout, McGonagall, Flitwick were all shaking their heads looking sorry and sadly at her. They pitted her and she hated that look even more then the looks of joy. She had no way to stop this.

She pulled herself together and Tom let her go. “I am sorry it had to come to this, but I am not sorry for my actions. We all know what is really go on here.” The room stayed eerily silent as she turned and headed out. She moved quickly until she came to the large wooden doors. How could she face all those people? All her willpower started to leave her, the reality of it all truly hitting her. She stumbled again.

“Mr. Malfoy see to Miss. Granger. Make sure she gets her proper dormitory.” Tom and Lavender grabbed either side of her.

Lavender whispered, “I am so sorry Hermione.”

“Ready?”

She shook her head and Tom helped the three of them push the doors open as she heard Malfoy’s steps behind her. She started to quicken her pace through the doors as tears spilled. She couldn’t look at him.
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Roars smacked her harshly in the face and as she looked out at them tears spilled. As she started to walk people saw her tears. The realization of what happened spread threw the crowd like a magical fire. Screams of horror rang out. She started to go to pieces. Ginny pushed through the crowd and grabbed her.

“Oh Merlin no. They didn’t?” She shook her head.

“They did,” she squeaked. Ginny took her from Lavender and Tom and started pushing through the crowd.

“Get me out of her,” she wailed, time slowing down. People were pulling their signs down their faces showing their pity.

As she reached the end of the crowd she heard Snape’s voice ring out. “Disperse or I will give every person I see in the next ten second a weeks detention. Say good bye to your Head Girl!”

She drew her wand and turned in Ginny’s arms but a new set of hands grabbed her. “Bad idea Granger. I got her from here. Headmaster’s orders Weasel.” Suddenly Malfoy was pulling her away, but her eyes were still on Snape. She wanted to murder him. It didn’t even matter that Malfoy was touching her she just wanted a piece of Snape. Malfoy pulled her wand hand down.

“All of you get out of here! You should be ashamed to support her!” Snape bellowed. She tired to move forward, reaching out to kill Snape but Malfoy pulled them around a corner and up stairs.

Finally when she could no longer see Snape she realized Malfoy was pulling her down a rarely used corridor and she struggled in his arms. When he wouldn’t let her go she became enraged. She screamed and beat against his chest until Malfoy could no longer drag her.

“Get your fucking dirty hands off ME!”

“Calm down Granger!”

“Calm down!?” She slapped him hard, his face turned from the force of the hit.

When he looked back at her rubbing his cheek he said, “I deserved that one but if you raise your hand to me again Granger we’ll have a problem.”

“We have a problem you son of bitch.”

“I didn’t want to do that, but I had no choice. Snape and Amycus are all over me already for coming to your honor again and again. I couldn’t say yes and get away with it.”

“The one time I really needed you to save me MALFOY!” She shrieked and came at him again. A part of her knew it was unfair but another part wanted to see him bleed. Make the red she was seeing real and tangible.

He caught her this time and pushed her against the wall. “I didn’t have a fucking choice. What do you want me to do?!”

“You make sure that Pansy doesn’t get my place! You hear me? Anyone but her!”

“I don’t have that power Granger. That is exactly who’ll they put to seal the power. You know that!”

“NO!” She started to cry her body going limb. “I fucking hate you!”

“I know Granger.”

“How could you?”

“I had to. The harsh truth is that I am a Malfoy, an up coming Death eater and you’re just a mudblood.”

“How can you…” she spat accusingly.

He leaned in and she couldn’t help but breath him in. Her body reacted and she tired to push it down. “I am sorry,” he mumbled brushing his lips against her neck.

“How fucking touching.” They both turned and Hermione could see, just slightly over Malfoy’s shoulder, Pansy coming out of the shadows.

Hermione was too mad to even realize that it would have been really bad if Pansy were standing past the last ten seconds. She pulled her wand and tired to push passed Malfoy. Malfoy pushed her back with his backside, but Pansy’s eyes were all for Malfoy.

“HOW! Tell me how you can touch her Malfoy. HOW CAN YOU!”

“You don’t understand what your talking about Pansy.” Hermione tired to push past him again, but Malfoy turned slightly taking his palm and roughly pushing against her chest. She slammed hard against the wall.

“DON’T ACT LIKE I AM STUPID! You’ve been obsessed with her! Spending all your time with her. Ignoring me!”

“She was my counter part and I was told to make sure the mudblood got to the dorms, by Snape. You’re loosing it Pansy. Before I took her back to the dorm I thought I’d remind the mudblood here who is boss.” Pansy looked torn.

Hermione couldn’t take the insult to injury. She threw her hand back and Pansy tired to warn Malfoy but her fist made contact with the back of his head. He stumbled forward and she pulled from the wall. She had her wand pointed at them both. Pansy’s wand pointing her.

“What the fuck Granger!”

“Fucking hex her Malfoy. Prove to me you haven’t gone soft for the mudblood.”

Malfoy wand wavered as he looked in Hermione’s eyes, and she saw so much regretted there. But she wanted to see more.

“She’s not worth it. She is nothing anymore. Wasn’t anything to begin with.” He couldn’t look her in the eyes when he said. He voice held a tone that Hermione had finally learned was sadness, but she couldn’t care less.

“I don’t fucking believe you. You’ve slept with her! Haven’t you?”

“NO! Gods no Pansy. Me sleep with a mudblood.” Even though she knew Malfoy could never pronounce their relationship to the world the denial and disgust stung.

“Fuck you Malfoy. Fuck you both.”

“Wait till your father hears what is going on. You’ll never be a Death Eater!”

“Pansy you don’t know what you’re talking about.” Malfoy started to back away still looking at Granger. ‘That’s right be afraid of me!’ She thought angrily.

“Let me prove to you Pansy that you’re wrong.” When Malfoy reached Pansy he pulled her in. He dragged her in the front to keep him out Hermione’s path and kissed Pansy. He kissed her deeply and it reminded her the way he use to kiss her. She felt sick.

“You know what Malfoy I think you have gone soft!” Then Hermione screamed, “Densauge.” Malfoy pulled from the kiss but that was most time he had. The spell hit Pansy hard. She screamed and started to enlarge at an alarming rate.

Hermione laughed horribly. Malfoy roared the counter-hex and Pansy started to swell back to normal size, but Hermione was already raising her wand again. She felt like hurting someone. She felt herself grow cold and dark inside. She’d never felt like before. “Mutatio Skullus!”

“Fuck Granger,” Malfoy roared as he blocked the spell. It hit the wall and stone flew around them. She knew she was making a lot a noise, but that’s what Malfoy got for bringing them to deserted hall to ‘talk’ to her.

She flicked her wand again. “Verdimillious,” they both screamed. They both had to jump to get out of the way. They both came back up in a fighting stance breathing hard. This time Pansy was up and ready too.

They started to duel. Lights flashed around them. Body-binds, Knee-reversals, and stinging hexes flew, as well as some Hermione didn’t know. And didn’t want to know. She dodged and blocked like she had practiced for so long. The stone and floor was scorched with their fight. Malfoy and Pansy looked fierce, but Pansy looked more than a little surprised that Hermione was keeping them both at bay.

Hermione had to admit she was a little surprised but she didn’t let it interrupt her concentration as a spell brushed her and her skin split. It started to bleed as the spell spun her. Her reflexes, on hyper-alert, forced her she to turn back quickly and put up a blocking spell. Two spells bounced off. She hissed as the pain in her shoulder hit her.

She screamed a body-bind spell with amazing force and it hit Pansy. She fell. Malfoy made a movement towards her and Hermione raised her wand ready to punish him for his empathy when she heard.

“HERMIONE!” Ginny rushed towards her, her wand pointing. “What are you doing?”

“Teaching Malfoy here to think twice before he votes against me AS HEAD GIRL!”

“What? Malfoy you what?” Ginny pointed her wand defensively at Malfoy.

“Yea, you can thank Malfoy here for me not being Head Girl anymore. I am sure a lot of people will be thanking you for that Malfoy. NO! You move any closer to her and I hurt you.”

“Hermione calm down they lost.”

Hermione started to feel the adrenaline fade but still the darkness in her raged. She walked towards Malfoy and Pansy. “Expeleamlous!” Malfoy’s wand flew, he looked shocked but didn’t move for it. She stood over Pansy’s who looked frighten. She bent down over the girl, taking a moment to look at Malfoy with all the anger she had. He looked back emotionless but she knew that really meant he was feeling deeply. She smiled cruelly before looking back down at Pansy; she knew Malfoy wouldn’t go for her he felt too guilty. That and he was unarmed and she was dangerous tonight.

“I hope you have fun replacing me Pansy. That’s all you’ll ever be. Second best to me. Hell, you’re not even second best. If it weren’t for your Death Eater supporters no one would even look at you twice for the position. Remember that when you walk where I walked. When you sleep where I slept, touched what I, a mudblood, touched,” she looked pointedly at Malfoy and than back to Pansy, “and when you fail where I exceeded. As for you Malfoy thanks for nothing.”


She walked back and Ginny grabbed her arm pulling her quickly from the scene. She watched Malfoy and Pansy disappear from her view all the while Malfoy looking at her. When she couldn’t see them anymore she cried. Ginny didn’t say anything just let her cry taking them the long way. When they finally got to the dorm Ginny hugged her tightly.

“It not okay now, but it will be okay. I promise.” Hermione hugged her tightly back. “By the way Hermione holy shit! I mean that was harsh. Amazing and ballzy but harsh.” They both laughed.
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“I can’t believe that good for nothing son of a Death Eater got you fired,” Neville roared taking another sip of fire whiskey. Hermione snatched the bottle from his hands.

“I think you’ve had enough,” but she drank deeply from it letting it burn down her throat. “And I didn’t get fired. It’s not like they were paying me to do the job. I got disbarred, replaced, kicked out, dismissed, BANISHED”

Ginny hiccupped. “Whatever the word Mion he is the cause.”

“Too bad you didn’t have another favor,” Seamus said taking the bottle from Hermione and taking another squig.

“Too bad you didn’t bunch him in his bloody precious face!” Ginny hissed.

“Ha. I think the back of the head was fine.” The group snickered. “But really there was nothing he could do even if he did owe me a favor. How could he have stood there in front of them all and said he wanted to keep me as Head Girl, even if he had wanted too.”

“That sounds an awful lot like you’re on his side!” Ginny shook her head and took another gulp. They had been doing this for an hour. When Hermione had entered the common room she was surrounded by questions, and outrage, but worse pity. After a few minutes she begged her friends to take her elsewhere. The scene outside the Hall had been embracement enough. Her removal crushing enough.

Neville had the good idea of going to the room of requirements. The magical space had given them a large common room like space with a large sofa the wound in a circle so they could all face each other. Also convenient for passing around the fire whiskey bottle that Seamus had brought.

“Trust me I am not on his side. Its just…”

“You guys had the strangest relationship.” Hermione sputtered over her next large gulp. She was well and truly drunk. They all were.

“What?”

“I don’t know for a while it seemed like you guys didn’t hate each other. I mean it even seemed like you might like each other. Or at least respect each other. And you know that whole talk a few days ago.”

“Malfoy doesn’t respect anyone,” Neville interjected.

“He doesn’t, not really,” Hermione agreed, still terrible angry with Malfoy. Though, as time passed she felt guilty for her actions and scared by her fearsome anger. “I guess we came to an understanding, for awhile. I don’t think Malfoy really hates people the way his father does. A product of his environment if you will, but he is still choosing the wrong path. You can only be friends with someone whose family you utterly despise and whose ideals and goals are utterly different from yours for so long.” She ranted her words slightly slurred.

“So you think you were friends then?” Neville asked who was more confused then the rest because he had missed their previous Malfoy conversation.

Hermione shrugged. “Yea, sometimes.”

Ginny sighed. “I am sorry Hermione. Maybe Malfoy didn’t have a choice but still he should have done the right thing. You just want to see the good in people. Just want to love the and that’s great, but you can’t love a snake.” Ginny had no idea just how close to the truth she was.

Hermione shrugged and took another mouthful noticing that it didn’t burn as much. She was starting to feel numb. Good.

“Agreed,” Seamus started, “but sometimes a snake can’t help but be what it is…a snake.” Ginny and Neville laughed at Seamus obvious statement but Hermione understood what he meant and she was content to leave the conversation at that.

“Lets not talk about him any more. Let us just drink and for tonight forget about all our problems. And seeing as I am not head girl I don’t give a shit about drinking our faces off, be damned responsibility.” She threw her hands up.

“I never thought I would live to hear those words from your mouth,” Seamus chuckled. “Lets do around of shots!” Shot glasses appeared in front of them and Seamus filled them. Hermione sighed. Gulp-wise Hermione was sure she had already done about three or four shots, her world warm and fuzzy. She’d probably be down for the count soon. More reason why she lifted her shot glass.

“What are we celebrating?” She asked glumly.

“Hmm there has to be something,” murmured Neville. “Hey, I know! Lets all go around and say one thing that we are still happy about. One thing that is still going right and cheers to that continuing good fortune. Not everything can be that bad.”

“Talk for yourself,” Hermione said a little irritated. “I don’t have my parents. Malfoy’s a royal ass. I lost my Head Girl position. Pansy might actually take my spot,” they all looked down and shook their heads, “Amycus has a hard on for making my life hell, and to top it all off Death Eaters are roaming our halls. Oh did I mention I almost died twice this week. That is a record even for me. How does Harry do it.”

“I am sorry…” Neville started looking down. Hermione felt a little guilty but she couldn’t help wallow her own self-pity and she knew what they said about misery and company…

“Don’t be sorry,” Ginny ranted. “I like the idea. One good thing no matter how small to remind us that there are still good things left in out lives. Raise your glasses. That means you too Hermione Granger!” They all raised their hands and sat there for a minute.

“Well... go Neville it was your idea. I actually need a minute to think about it,” Seamus huffed. The group laughed solemnly.

“Alright. This is to a mission well done,” Hermione looked at him coldly but he kept going. “ I am serious. Without your brains and all our help Harry might still be one step behind. So I say to a mission well done.”

“Aye,” Ginny said and looked a Neville reassuringly.

Seamus went next. “Okay, I got one. This is to Dean Thomas and too all the half-breeds, and mudbloods, and blood traitors out there who stand up and fight!”

“Aye!” They all yelled and Hermione started to feel slightly up lifted and she started.

“This is to good friends, who are near and far. Who always have my back. Who pull me up when I am down and remind me that there is more to life that good grades and fancy titles. The reason we fight!”

“AYE!”

“This is to,” Ginny roared taking all the hype, “this is to love! The love of friends, the love of family, and to true love, which doesn’t brake from distance.” Hermione could swear she saw a reflection of Harry in Ginny’s eyes and her mind went to Malfoy. “To the one thing in life you can never have enough of!”

They all looked at each other and yelled, “AND to Ron and Harry!” They downed their shots in perfect unison. After their initial reactions to the harsh shot they laughed.

“That was a good idea Neville,” Hermione said smiling.

“It happens some times,” Neville said laughing. “Hey how is the arm?” Hermione sighed. Neither Ginny nor Hermione were nearly as good of a healer as Malfoy so it still stung, but the alcohol was helping.

She stretched her arm and winced a bit. “I’ve had worse but it aches a little. A couple more shots will cure that.” They all took another round.

After a couple more swigs they stumbled through the hall. Trying to be quite but probably failing miserable. They all hugged Hermione as they started to depart.

“I love you guys.”

“Love you too,” the all slurred.
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Hermione woke up with a terrible headache and horrible desire to puke, which she shoved down with great effort. As she got ready she thought about Malfoy. She hated him right now but she knew he had no other choice. Not really. She was thinking about apologizing, maybe just one small apology for bunching his head…

But that went out of the window at breakfast.
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“You guys look like shit,” she said sliding next to Ginny.

“You don’t look so good either Mion,” Seamus commented just staring at his food. Only Neville was scarfing down food like it was his job.

He looked over weary shoving food in his mouth, reminding her of Ron. “What? I guess I get really hungry when I have a hangover.” The rest of them groaned thinking about food.

Just towards the end of breakfast, Hermione barely touching her food because she was looking at Malfoy wanting to catch him before classes, Snape stood. Malfoy hadn’t looked over once.

“I have an announcement.” All the Gryffindors looked from Hermione to Snape, giving Snape glares.

“I wanted to announce the new Head Girl.” Hermione felt her self still. ‘Please don’t let it be Pansy,’ she chanted again and again in her mind.

“Mr. Malfoy if you wouldn’t mind joining me.” Malfoy stood and floated to the stage not even looking back at her.

“And would Pansy Perkinson please come up front too.” The room went silent as Pansy flew to stand next to Malfoy. She grabbed his arm beaming over the crowd, totally oblivious that most people looked horrified.

Snape handed Pansy a sparkling Head Robe as he said, “Everyone please say hello to your new Head Girl Miss. Parkinson,” in a cheerful disposition that was more disturbing then pleasant. The room erupted with shouts but only friendly ones from Slytherin table.

Hermione pushed her food away, “And I thought I was going to loose my appetite before.” The whole table looked around looking as if they had been injured. She felt her self fill with rage but she could do nothing but shake her head.

“NOW now everyone I know this is disruptive but exciting. I expect you all to give Miss. Parkinson the respect she deserves. I am sure she will do an excellent job.”

“She’ll get the same respect she always gotten from me, ugly, pugged face slag,” Ginny spat angrily. Pansy descended down back to her seat, the Slytherins cheering again. She gave Hermione a pointed look before she sat that said plainly ‘fuck you.’

“I have to go. I am going to be sick.”

“Do you want me to go with you?” Ginny asked. Looking up sadly at her.

“No, no I am fine. I just want to be alone.”

She rather punch Malfoy in the back of the head again that give him the an apology.
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The library didn’t give her the kind of solace it normally did. Maybe it didn’t help that she was staring down at Sir Gallant’s ride to Helen and thinking of Malfoy.

“Miss. Granger,” she hated that everyone knew where to find her. She turned sighing to find Professor McGonagall. “I know your upset. Rightly so, but it is not an excuse to skip classes. Especially if you are not sick.”

“Sorry Professor, but to be honest most of the classes are a joke.”

“Even as that may be it still important to keep things going as best we can. Not showing up to class sets a bad example.”

“I don’t feel like putting on this façade any more Professor, all due respect but this place is bullshit. And I am not Head Girl anymore I don’t have to be concerned about setting good examples.”

“That may be so but you are still a very important person to this school. I think you will see that to many students you are still their Head Girl, the person who has their best interest in mind. Who they can go to for lessons, or when they feel sick, or when they have lost some dear to them.” Professor McGonagall slid in a chair across from her. She was pressed and placed just perfect but Hermione could see the circles under her eyes.

“Hermione dear I didn’t just come here to tell you that. You are a smart girl I am sure you know these things or at least you would have figured it out. Though I know it is hard to see through grief sometimes you are strong. I am just happy that you survived.”

“What did you come here for then?” She asked not wanting to hear anymore lectures.

“A few things. First, I’d like to know what you were thinking entering Snape’s office. What was it that was so important to not only risk your life but the life of your friends?” Hermione resented the statement but tried to see past it.

“I told you.”

“I am not a fool either Miss. Granger. We are on the same side. Tell me.”

“As I said it was to help Dean and stir up a little trouble. Someone needs to around here.”

“I would advice against that Hermione. It is not smart for any of you students to go up against them. You are all still students and they are, to be blunt, trained killers.”

“Well someone has to do something. I don’t see the professors doing much.” She said accusingly.

“Be angry if you want, but what are we to do? Keeping my students safe is my first priority. Hard enough as it with out you all gallivanting into Snape’s office and making a newsletter. If we tried to rise up people would get killed. AND even if I were willing to risk that, which I AM NOT, they would be back. Hogwarts is important to them for some reason, and I believe He-Who-Most-Not-Be-Named would spare no amount of people to gain it back. Now again what were you doing in Snape’s office?”

“I won't, no I can’t tell you that. But I am telling you mostly the truth. Do you believe me when I say that it was very important? More important then you can image.” McGonagall just stared at her. “It doesn’t matter Dumbledore would have understood.”

“I believe that you really believe that. As for Dumbledore he is most of the reason I haven’t force you tell me what is going on, but he is not here and if I catch you doing something like that again I will have to know what you are doing. I won't let you risk your life or the lives of those I vowel to protect while I am here.”

“And when you’re not here? And seeing as we are talking human to human and not student to Professor I will tell you I care about preserving their lives not just with in the school perimeters but out side it too Professor. I think we must think about our futures as well and not try to preserve some long gone present. I am doing what I can for Harry and for Dumbledore. And you could try to force me to tell you.”

McGonagall ignored the comment. “That comes to my second question. Do you know where Harry Potter is? The Order would like to know.”

“I just sure they would,” she sneered. “I really don’t know.”

“But you wouldn’t tell me if you did?”

“Not a chance. I’d take that to the grave with me so I hope no one push it to that.”

The older women looked horrified for a moment. “I would never. We are on the same side Hermione try to remember that.”

“I do professor, sorry. All I can tell you is that the last I heard he were okay, but I no longer know where he is. Never really did to be honest.”

“I feel you are telling me the truth on that and truthfully it is more than I thought I would get. But one can hope. And the Newsletter?”

“I swear that is not me but again if I found out who it was I wouldn’t tell. I am not so please about the first issue but at least they are giving us a voice.”

“Well at least you are only stupid enough to be the master mind behind one plan.”

“I am not stupid. I have a question for you now Professor. What is the Order up to? What is going on, on the outside?”

She sighed. “I guess I am in your place now. I can’t really tell you anything. Things are looking bad. That I will not sugar coat. That is the reason why we are looking for Harry Potter and Ron Wesley. We are fighting battles and going on every lead we get. Those of them still left with any standing in the ministry are trying to stop the horrible laws they are trying to pass.”

“The Linage Law. Bastards.”

“How did you know?” Hermione shrugged. “You are maddening.”

“The Wesley’s, Miss. Longbottom, the Finnigans, and Remus and Tonks?”

“All okay as far as I know. Neville’s grandmother sure has a spirit about her.” They both laughed.

“She should be proud of Neville,” Hermione said.

“I’ll be sure to pass the message along. And just so you know I am very proud of you Hermione even if I don’t understand or agree with you methods. Very proud.”

“Thanks professor that really does mean a lot. I do know we are on the same side. I won’t forget again, but I will say please leave Harry alone.”

“That I cannot promise. Good night dear.” Professor McGonagall stood looking down at her like a mother who was both scared and proud of her daughter. It reminded her too much of the way her mother use to look at her the last two years when her parents would send her off to school. ‘Can’t we find you another magical school if you are not safe.’ Her mother would plead all summer.

“Hogwarts is my home,” she said out loud softly.

“What dear?” Professor McGonagall asked turning around.

“Oh nothing. Something I use to tell my mother when she would get worried. ‘Hogwarts is my home. My home away from home.’

“That it is for all of us. To some of us it is all the home we know. That is why I beg you to try to preserve what is left of it. For what they have taken is the gravest of all, our sanctuary.”

“As long as we stand together here in this home, united, and force them to see they don’t belong than it will always be ours,” Hermione said

“It is a nice hope, maybe even a true one.” As the older women turned Hermione said.

“And their only hope Professor. Remember that.”

A few minutes later she could no longer stand the stifling slience and she slammed the book shut. All the voices of some many people ran through her head. Tom begging to know where his sister was as he still hadn’t found her, Dumbledore’s, Harry’s as he looked at her and told she had to come back to this hell hole, Ron’s, Ginny’s, Professor McGonagall’s, Lavender’s, the collective DA, and worst Malfoy’s.

She needed to shut them out. She needed some time to heal. Just a week, hell a day, even an hour would do. She ran through the common room glad to see most people were still in classes. She slumned on her bed and felt something cringle under her ass.

She pulled out a folded piece of paper and regonized the hand writing imeditaley. She was tempted to throw it away but curiousity got the best of her.

Granger,
If you are reading this than curiosity got the best of you and for that I am thankful (god she must be so pertictable she thought glumly but kept reading.) I still want you to fulfill the five days. You said yourself it was a short amount in a lifetime. Meet me at the abanonded dungeon on the south side at 8:00 and don’t be late.
- M

She shook, ripping the paper into pieces. How could he not even aplogize in the letter? After what he had done! On top of no apology he wanted her to meet him in an abandoned dungeon? Did he not remember her last experience with them, or did that turn his sick mind on. ‘Forget about him,’ she thought, “he is just another Death Eater.’ It was easier thought than done because Malfoy was unlike anyone else.
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Malfoy waited until 9:15 pm until he cursed loudly and kicked the wall several times. She hadn’t show. A part of Malfoy had known this was a good possibility but the larger part of him, which he would never be able to shake, felt his pride was wounded. No one stood up a Malfoy. It hadn’t been done by anyone who wished to have continued good standing or still have a head on their necks.

But Granger never cared much for good standing and, as he was well aware of after last night, she wasn’t scared of him either. That which scared Hermione was put done with great prejudice. That or tamed. Neither or which she had done to Malfoy yet but that minks tired.

He was raging mad. That stupid dirty blood whore had once again made him look bad, even if it was only to himself. Yet he couldn’t get the image of her tussled hair spread on his bed, or the way her lips looked as she talked about something serious. He knew that while he had done what needed to be done he had sacrificed her to do it. But how many times had he been willing to sacrifice himself to save her he battled in his mind. How many times had he come to her rescue and once when he could not she hated him. That was what worried him most, that she would hate him forever.

Malfoy sulked as he walked back to the Head dorms. He wasn’t looking forward to neither the empty feeling Granger had left nor the over bearing presence Pansy had filled it with. Maybe he should just sleep with her to shut her up. He needed a good shag, but Pansy might have to do. ‘Forget Granger,’ he thought, ‘she’s just another goody-goody on the wrong side'. But that was easier thought than done because no one was quite like Granger.
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The next day was just as awful as the day before. Or hell all the days since Snape and his band of not so merry Death Eaters showed up, but no it had to be worse because she didn’t have Malfoy anymore.

She was glad they didn’t have classes because seeing Malfoy’s face after she’d stood him up would hurt too much. She had given him up and she knew it would only be more real when she saw his face. More real when she watched Pansy strut in her, HERMIONE GRANGER’S, Head robes.

She couldn’t bare to think of him with the mark on his arm. Couldn’t bare it, just couldn’t. She wanted to badly to save him but what could she offer him? She could offer him only one thing. The one thing she wasn't sure she was ready to give and he probably wouldn’t take it anyway. That thing that makes you feel wrapped up and safe, but it is a lie. It doesn’t save you from death it just makes you feel good.

She played a few rounds of wizarding chest and lost ever single game. That normally only happened when she played with Ron. Finally some time after lunch Luna, and Ginny dragged her off to the lake. It was bitter cold but sky was cloudless and bright.

They talked girl talk for while though Hermione often just listened. She was staring off in space when she heard Ginny hiss, “What are you doing here Malfoy.”

“Free country or haven’t you got the memo. I can do what I like. But I actually came to talk to Granger.”

“In less the words are 'I am sorry. You’re right I am the biggest tosser in the world but I’ll I do what I can to change that,' I don’t think she has anything to say to you, Malfoy!” Ginny said.

Hermione just stared at him taking in all the beauty and wondering why the devil always looked so good?

“Maybe I have, thought I think it would go more like this,' I am sorry Granger. I know I am the most beautiful, smart, witty creature you’ve ever met and you’ll miss that you don’t get to spend every moment looking at me but here is a tissue to cry about.' ” All the girls growled.

“Go away Malfoy your mere presence makes me feel grimy like a Slughorned Grumble Bee,” Luna said.

“They don’t exist you looney,” Malfoy spat.

Ginny lept up and pointed her wand. “You know the one thing I hate more than seeing you is hearing you.”

“Why because you know you could never get anything of this caliber? Waiting on a dead man are we?”

“I'll show you a dead man.” Hermione and Luna had to jump up and grab Ginny before she ripped Malfoy apart.

“Enough,” Hermione spat. “If it will get you to leave I can give you five minutes.”

Hermione and Malfoy walked off as Luna tried to clam Ginny down. “Okay I am listening unless you have anymore horrible low blow insults to throw around.”

“Just shut up Granger. I am horrible at apologies.”

“Such a shame concidering you normally need to give them.”

Malfoy growled. “I wanted to say how bad I feel Granger. I know you can't forgive me but I didn’t want to do that. I promise I didn’t know he would ask. That I really thought that keeping an eye on you would prevail and keep you in. I hate not having you in the dorms and Pansy is horrible. Always premping. Messy as hell too. Really terribly stupid aswell. Didn't realize that before.”

“It's hard to tell that about someone when they always have their lips on your dick Malfoy. Though really I can tell by just looking at her, but your ranting right now.”

“Right. I am sor..sor...sorry I couldn’t help you when you needed it but I think you should be thankful for all the times I have. I mean in twenty-four hours I’ll be his and I can't afford to look bad. Can you understand that? This is my life we are talking about.”

“And it was mine too when you stood up their so casually and took a huge part of it away,” Malfoy started to talk but she stopped him, “but I do understand. I know now when I think about it that not even you could talk your way out of that. BUT I don’t have to like it. And I am thankful for all the times you saved my ass. You can't know how greatful I am and I hate that it as come to this but it has. We knew it would in some way.”

“I knew you would see sense but Granger…”

“Wait. Let me make one thing clear to you Malfoy, I forgive you because at that point you had not choice, but if you hadn’t been such a hateful bastard to me for the last six years maybe you could have stood up their and had my back. Maybe if you had choosen your own path and not that of you father's we wouldn’t be here.”

“Once again talking about what you don’t know.”

“NO I do know this. I can’t imagine how hard it had been for you but at some point you have to stand and do what is right. You should have taken the protection Dumbledore offered you long ago.”

“I WAS A KID. I didn’t know what to think then. I know now, I have a better idea at least but it's too late, I will survive. I could never be sure with Dumbledore that I would survive and even a year ago I was so YOUNG!”

“WE STILL ARE KIDS! It sucks. I know. I want to be doing homework, worrying about grades and prefects schedules, going to Lavender’s dumb balls, kissing boys with out worry, and gallivanting about but I can’t.”

Malfoy got close to her suddenly. “Kissing boys, plural?” he asked smirking.

She pulled back wanting him too much. “Don’t do that it won’t work.”

“Meet me tonight? Please.”

“NO.”

“Why I thought you understood?I thought we were going to have some time together before it was impossible? ”

“It’s impossible right now.” She turned to leave. It hurt too much to say those words to him.

“That’s right run away like always. Coward.” She turned back mad now.

“ME? I am the coward? What about you? If you like me or even have an ounce of respect for me then that means somewhere in there you see past my blood. I know even if it’s just me you 'like' that you see, through me, people are so much more then their linage, and yet you run off to get the mark. Why? Because you think they will protect you or they will actually win. Or do you really think us so weak. Think me so weak.”

“You are stubborn, stupid, and an idealist to a fault but you are never weak.”

“I know that and I have you to thank for that Malfoy. I have you to thank for so many things and whenever you need something you can call on me but I will not condone your actions but spending the night with you. I am not the coward here.”

“I don’t need your charity. And how can you refuse to see my side or spend one more night with me but you offer your undying gratitude and help? You make no sense.”

She started to grow frustrated and she would always blame that on what she said next, “Because I love you MALFOY and I can’t watch you destroy yourself!”

They both just stood staring at each other. Hermione slapped her hand over her mouth and her eyes grew wide, but it was nothing compared to the look on Malfoy’s face. For once her confession didn’t make him smirk. Had she really just said that? Merlin no. Did she mean it? Yes and No. “I just, I mean…”

“Are you in love with me?” He stammered.

“I, what, oh Merlin. I just care about you. Most of the time I consider you my friend and I lo…care about my friends.”

“Friends? I don’t need friends.”

“okay, oh and Malfoy Harry is not dead man so fuck you.” She turned and ran as Malfoy called after her. She was terribly hurt that he hadnt said anything remotly kind back though she knew he wouldn't. Hell, she hadn't know she even really felt that why till now. But worse he said he didn't need friends.
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Malfoy called after her, “GRANGER WAIT.” She didn’t turn. "GRANGERRRR!" Nothing. “I love you too,” he said under his breath. He hated himself more than he thought possible. He never wanted to feel or say those words again.
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Hermione sat staring at her wall all night thinking about what she had said. She spent all the next two days in bed thinking about it too, pretending she was sick. She watched seven o’clock roll by on Sunday and she really did feel sick then. Malfoy was gone.

“Hermione I can't take you pacing like that. What is going on?” Lavender complained.

“Something important is happening and I just wish I could stop it,” she mumbled. She couldn't stand not seeing him.

“Then go do it. You’ve been pacing for three hours and that certainly isn’t helping. Nevermind that it is driving me crazy!”

“Your right Lav, thanks.” She grabbed her robes and ran out of the room.
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She flew to the Head Dorms and skirted to a haut.

“Hi Gertrude,” she said breathlessly.

“Oh hello dear. I am afraid I can’t let you in. Did you forget something I could tell Miss. Parkinson or Mr. Malfoy?"

“Ha, no it is nothing like that. I don’t need to be let in. I just need to know if Malfoy is here? Is he back?”

“No, the Headmaster took him and the Head Girl out sometime ago. It really is getting late now that you mention it.”

“Yes, yes okay well I just have something important to tell the Head Boy so I’ll just wait here.”

“Okay dear if thats how you want to spend your night. Just don't get caught.”

Hermione paced awhile, sometimes thinking she should just leave but she had to know. Know what she wasn’t sure. Finally she slumped against the wall falling asleep to the soft rhythm of Gertrude’s snores.
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She felt hands pinning her shoulders and that's what woke her. “What the fuck are you doing here Granger?” It took her a second to remember where she was and then to process that Malfoy was kneeling over her pressing his hands painfully into her shoulder.

“I…” Malfoy looked horrible. His hair was disheveled with a large burse forming at his eye. His robes were torn and from what she could see in the torch light there was blood on his lips and robes. “Malfoy you're hurt,” she tired to raise her hand to his face.

His slapped her hand back and pulled up. She stood too, becoming a little anxious. “I said what the fuck are you doing here. Couldn’t wait to see my great fall from grace!” He spat with so much anger it smacked her. Now that she noticed how mad he was she could feel it. It felt same as Amycus on that horrible day but it had a personal Malfoy flavor to it. She tired not to wince back from it.

“I, I just wanted to make sure you were alright. I just needed to see you.” She tired to control her stammering.

Malfoy laughed darkly and pushed up against her painfully. “That most be a joke Granger. You wouldn't dare see me before. Impossible is the word you used. What you want a novelty fuck with a Death Eater?” He held her pinned with one arm as he grabbed his robes in his mouth and pulled down his sleeve. She tried to look away from the horrible mark slithering on his arm but he caught her face. She was afraid to fight him. Maybe if she let him be mad he would let her go soon. What had she been thinking come here. Oh Merlin what had Malfoy been through!

“Take a look Granger! If you want so badly to sleep with a Death Eater that can be arranged. Amycus maybe?

She pushed past him freeing herself for a second. “You fucking bastard!” But Malfoy was on her again. He bit into her neck. “MALFOY STOP!”