Harry Potter and The Secret Keeper (BP2)
folder
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
44
Views:
32,304
Reviews:
209
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
1
Category:
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
44
Views:
32,304
Reviews:
209
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
1
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Family Secrets
Chapter Number/Total: 22/44
Chapter Title: Family Secrets
Words: 3074 Words
Harry had gotten up feeling rather good, despite the rough times he knew were ahead. He was still happy that Draco had managed to get into Grimmauld Place and after last night's meeting and him being elected official leader, he felt like things were starting to get done now, or at least like they could start to get done.
He was heading down into the kitchen with Draco now and he could hear voices in the room as he approached.
Hermione seemed to be cooking something, and Ron was towering over her.
"That's not the way my mum does it," Harry heard him say.
Hermione huffed.
“Morning all," said Harry, grinning and shaking his head at the couple by the cooker.
Draco hesitated at the door to the kitchen. At least these were people he was used to. He took what seemed to have become "his seat" at Harry's left side.
"Morning, Harry," said Hermione, sending Ron a slightly dark look.
"Where did everyone else go off to then?" asked Harry.
"Home," said Ron, and he eyed the pot on the stove again.
"It's not going to be perfect, Ron, so deal with it!" Hermione snapped, huffing again.
Ron rolled his eyes once Hermione had turned away from him and then he came and sat next to Harry. "She's trying to cook up the recipe Mum left for breakfast," he mumbled.
Harry snorted. "Smells alright," he said with a small shrug.
Remus came in yawning, then muttered his greeting before dropping into a seat at the end of the table.
Draco hid a smile by leaning his elbow on the table and putting his hand over his mouth. He looked about for tea, hoping someone had at least used magic for that.
"Tea's on the counter if anyone wants any," said Hermione a bit stiffly.
Draco looked around and then got up and went to make himself tea. "Anyone else?" he asked politely.
"Please," groaned Remus, rubbing his face.
"Two sugars," said Harry, smiling.
Draco made Harry's tea and set it down in front of him. "Sugar or milk?" he asked Remus.
"Black," the man responded and Draco set a cup in front of him, before returning to finish his own.
"Thanks, love," Harry said to Draco before turning to Lupin.
"Morning," he said, and then more quietly, "Are you still wanting to talk to me?"
Lupin slurped his tea and then sighed. "Yes, after breakfast."
Harry nodded and leaned back in his chair. "Anything in the Prophet today?" he asked.
Ron sighed. "Nothing new, mate," he said. "I suppose that would be good news if we didn't know the bastard's just waiting to spring something on us after Dumbledore's death."
Harry frowned slightly and nodded.
Draco nodded, sipping his sweet drink. "Not waiting, planning," he said quietly.
Harry raised an eyebrow. "Planning?" he asked.
Ron and Hermione looked at Draco too
"Waiting implies idleness." Draco sighed. "Planning is active. He is planning and preparing for something."
Harry furrowed his brow. "He's always planning something," he said bitterly.
"Are there scones?" Draco asked.
Harry shrugged.
"Mrs Weasley brought things from home last night and left them here. Everything she left is in that basket," said Hermione pointing.
Harry got to his feet and grabbed the basket for Draco and put it on the table in front of him.
Draco nodded. "Thanks," he said, and picked out a scone, piling the cream on.
"You staying long, Remus?" Harry asked Lupin, sipping his tea.
Remus shrugged. "Not sure, yet."
Harry nodded.
Hermione huffed from the stove. "Does anybody even want porridge besides Ron?" she asked.
"I actually was just going to make some toast," said Harry.
Draco raised an eyebrow at Harry and glanced up at Hermione, wondering if he should risk it or not.
Hermione sighed heavily and rolled her eyes. "I'm not making it anymore, Ron," she said. "You can just make it yourself."
Ron let out an indignant sound. "I don't know how to make it!" he said.
"Well you'll have to learn," said Hermione, dropping what she was doing and moving the pot off the burner.
"Who's going to make it if you don't?" asked Ron.
"You can," said Hermione dangerously.
"I can not, I'm not-"
"Not what? A female?!" said Hermione shrilly.
"It is too early for this," said Harry eyes wide.
Draco watched the argument like most people would watch a tennis match, smirking and clearly enjoying it.
Harry sighed and got to his feet. "Shut it you two," he said. "I know how to cook, so let's not argue over it, although Ron, if you are the only person who wants something, you should just learn to make it yourself, because I'm not going to wait on you."
Ron scowled. "How do you know how to cook?" he asked.
"I just do," said Harry, not really wanting to talk about the Dursleys. "Although I don't much feel like cooking right now. Just make some toast or eat something out of that basket and be happy."
Draco looked sideways at Harry considering and filing the information away for later.
The group finished with breakfast and Harry hung back a bit to wait for Lupin. He didn't know whether he minded if Draco was there or not.
Remus finished breakfast but seemed to be dawdling, avoiding what he needed to do. Finally, he looked up. "Harry, can we talk in the study?"
Harry frowned a bit and nodded. "Yeah, sure," he said. "I'll be back in a minute, okay?" he said to Draco.
Draco nodded and turned back to sit at the table, picking up The Daily Prophet.
Harry walked out of the kitchen and down the hall with Lupin. When they were in the study, he turned around to face the man and raised an eyebrow in question.
Lupin sat down in one of the reading chairs and motioned toward the other one. "Have a seat, Harry."
Harry sat down as well and rested his hands on his knees, his foot tapping nervously. He had a feeling that whatever Lupin wanted to tell him either wasn't good, or wouldn't make him happy.
"I'm worried about you, Harry," Remus said, shaking his head.
Well, Harry hadn't been expecting that. "Why?" he asked, eyebrows pulled together.
"This ... relationship you have with Draco," he sighed, "seems to be affecting your behaviour."
"What do you mean?" Harry asked slowly, brows still lowered.
"Well, first there was the incident after the wedding," Remus said. "I wouldn't expect that sort of thing from you."
Harry's eyes widened and he flushed. "Erm... well - I don't - ah, hmm," he said, although that wasn't really saying anything at all.
Remus shook his head. "And then there was the meeting yesterday."
Harry winced. "What...about that makes you worry about me... exactly?" he said, pained expression on his face.
"You seem less and less concerned with other people," Remus said. "Not just recently, but this year, it seems as if you have been obsessed with Malfoy, er, Draco."
Harry hesitated. "Well - I - I love him," he said. "I still care about everything else, but - I love him - erm, a lot - like, very, very much. I can't explain it." Harry looked at the floor, his face still red.
"Only three months ago, you hated him," Remus said. "And now you put him above others in everything."
Harry frowned now, but he didn't look up. "I know it sounds mad," he said, "but I can't help how I feel. I would die for him," he said quietly.
"I understand that such feelings can be intense, Harry," Remus said. "I have been in love before."
Harry looked up now. "Then why are you asking me this?" he said quietly. "If you've been in love, then you know I can't help it."
"You used your position yesterday to basically railroad the others into accepting Draco," Remus said.
"It would make everything far more complicated and we would be wasting time on something pointless if I didn't," said Harry a bit firmly now.
"Harry, can't you see how this looks to others?" Remus asked, leaning forward, his elbows on his knees.
Harry raised an eyebrow. "How does it look to others?" he asked, voice louder.
"First, you only agree to take the leadership role after Draco thinks you should. Then you give the other members no choice about his membership," Remus explained. "They are already suspicious of him."
"Are you saying they think he's controlling me or something?" Harry asked, sounding slightly angry now.
"I don't think he's controlling you, but others might." Remus sighed, leaning back. "I do worry, myself, that what is happening between the two of you is out of control."
Harry scowled. "Out of control? How is it out of control?"
"Harry, just try to give others time to get used to Draco." He closed his eyes. "And try to keep some sense of propriety."
"I know what's important," Harry said, eyes slightly narrowed. "I haven't forgotten what I need to do and, in fact, Draco and I were just talking about this the other day. We both understand that this isn't just about us. I know how huge this is."
"Good, Harry," Remus said. "I know I haven't been around much. I'm not Sirius, but I want you to remember that I care about you."
Harry stared at Lupin sadly for a moment. "I - I know," he said. He wondered what Sirius would say to all this. Wondered if Sirius would feel like Lupin if he were here.
Remus smiled tiredly at him. "I'm... glad you're happy, Harry. You deserve to be."
Harry gave a small smile. "I am happy. You have no idea how happy he makes me."
***
Draco waited, tea finished, and having read more of the Prophet than he wanted. He glanced nervously at the door. He finally got up and made his way around, looking at parts of the house that he hadn't had a chance to study yet. He found the Black family tree tapestry and stood looking at it.
Harry had left Lupin and gone back into the kitchen where Ron and Hermione were still sitting at the table.
"Where's Draco?" he asked, looking around the room.
Ron shrugged.
"I think he went to look around," said Hermione absently, reading a book.
Harry left the kitchen again and went looking around the house. He found Draco a few minutes later in the drawing room.
"Hey," he said quietly, coming up behind him and wrapping his arms about Draco's waist.
Draco sighed as Harry touched him. He didn't know exactly how, but he recognised Harry's footsteps without looking.
"What are you doing?" Harry asked, resting his chin on Draco's shoulder.
"My family has a similar one," Draco said quietly, still staring at the tapestry. "It's just odd to see my name here."
"Your mother was a Black," Harry said, remembering when Sirius had told him.
"See." Draco nodded, pointing at the tapestry.
Harry nodded too. "Draco... I know you haven't talked about your family or anything much, but... how - I mean - what would your mother do? Your father's in prison, but if they find your mum, will she be angry with you or anything?"
Draco snorted. "What would she do?" he asked aloud. "Whatever my Father told her."
"She doesn't - she doesn't care at all?" Harry asked quietly.
Draco thought about the question, his eyes still studying the tapestry. "It depends on what you mean by care, doesn't it?" he answered. "Do you mean would she challenge Father over me? Over something this... big? Not likely."
Harry was silent for a moment. "How do you feel about your parents?"
Draco tried to feel something about his parents. Mostly he felt empty. Was he hurt? Sad? Did he miss them? Probably, but mostly, "I feel scared."
Harry tightened his hold on Draco. "Scared because of what they'll do to you, or scared for them?"
"I think both," he said quietly.
Harry was silent again. He couldn't really relate to Draco at all, having never had parents. Even if he would have had parents, he was sure he'd probably never feel the way Draco felt about his. "I'm sure they love you," Harry said quietly, not knowing what else to say. "Didn't your mother make an Unbreakable Vow with Snape?"
"I think my mother cares what happens to me, yes," Draco said. "Does she have the power to do anything about it? Is she willing to defy my father? Especially now, after what I have done? I doubt it. Father will want me punished."
Harry frowned. "I won't let him touch you," he said quietly.
Draco nodded, understanding how Harry felt. "At the very least, I will be disowned, like Sirius was," he said.
Harry kissed the side of Draco's neck. "You'll always have me. It's all I can offer, but it's something at least."
Draco tore his eyes away from the tapestry and turned to face Harry. He cupped his hand along the other boy's jaw. "Best offer I have ever had." He smiled.
Harry smiled too. "I'm glad," he said softly.
"So what did the werewolf have to say?" Draco asked, glad to change the topic.
Harry sighed. "Apparently, I'm madly in love with you. Literally," he said.
Draco smirked. "I could have told him that."
Harry snorted. "He says he thinks I'm different now because of you... and oh, Merlin, he talked about us shagging during the wedding and last night! Maybe I really should stop being so loud..."
Draco laughed. "Gryffindors." He leaned in, licking at Harry's lips, then whispered, "Maybe he just misses Sirius."
Harry looked at Draco and raised an eyebrow. "Of course he does, they were best mates, but what does that have to do with anything?"
Draco chuckled darkly. "Yeah, they were close, or so I hear." He nipped at Harry's jaw.
Harry tilted his head to give Draco more room. "What do you mean?" he asked.
Tilting his head, Draco sucked and nibbled under Harry's jaw to his neck and ear. He licked Harry's ear and whispered across the wet, "You can't be that innocent still, not now."
Harry bit his lip and his eyes fell shut. He really didn't quite know what Draco was telling him, but then again, he couldn't really think with Draco licking him. "Draco, I really have no idea what you're-" but then Draco's words clicked and his eyes opened widely. "Are you saying Sirius and Lupin were - that they-"
"Mmhmm," Draco hummed against him, sucking on his neck right under and behind his ear.
"They never told me that!" Harry said indignantly. "And how on earth would you know?"
Draco pulled back, wincing. "Right here, Harry," he said. "No need to shout. And why would they tell you?"
"Because - well - Sirius was my godfather. I mean - you'd think he'd tell me something like that!" Harry said.
"Your godfather discussed his sex life with you?" Draco raised an eyebrow.
"Well, no, but it would be more than just a sex life wouldn't it? I never even - I mean - they never acted like they were together..." But now that Harry thought of it, thought back to how Remus and Sirius acted around each other... it sort of made sense. "How would you know something like that and not me?"
"You Gryffindors seem to have a very provincial attitude toward sex." Draco sighed. "Just look at all the comments your friends made about us."
Harry thought and then nodded. "Yeah, I guess." He was overcome with a sudden sadness. "Lupin said that he had been in love when he spoke to me... do you think it was Sirius he was talking about?" he asked quietly.
Draco frowned. "That's the rumour, at least."
Harry didn't say anything for a while. He just stood there and stared at Draco's nose instead of his eyes. Lupin had seen Sirius die, had held Harry back from running to Sirius and Harry hadn't even paid Lupin any attention at all, hadn't cared about how he had felt. If what Draco was saying was true... Harry couldn't even imagine... "Oh, Merlin... I - how must he feel if that's true? Listening to us and - seeing us... I feel awful now. I couldn't imagine being without you."
Draco stiffened. He really hadn't thought about that either. "Yes, but it also means he probably understands more about how we feel than you realised."
Harry frowned and moved forward to hug Draco. "He saw him die, Draco. He saw him get killed. I ran after Sirius and he pulled me back, when all he probably wanted to do was - And I didn't even - Merlin."
Draco pulled Harry over to the sofa and sat him down, sitting beside him. "I didn't know," he said.
Harry stared at his legs. "I don't even know what to say," he whispered. "All I can think is... what if that happened to one of us - I wouldn't even - I just - I don't know what to say."
Draco took a deep breathe. "He hasn't told you, so what can you say?"
Harry gave a weak shrug. "Nothing, I just feel so awful now, you know?" He sighed ad leaned back into the couch. "I miss Sirius so much... but it must be nothing compared to how much Lupin misses him."
Draco nodded, thinking about it too. He realised it explained a few things he had wondered about. He was related to Sirius but never knew him. Never heard anything good about him. Draco sighed, wrapping his hand up around Harry's head so that he held him against his shoulder.
Harry sat on the sofa and was quiet for a while, just resting against Draco. He sighed again. "Enough of this, yeah?" he asked, sitting up more so that he was level with Draco's face.
Draco smiled a little sadly but nodded. "What then?" he asked.
Harry hugged Draco again and said into his ear, "We could look through the books in the house - or, well - you could, and then maybe tell me what to look for. Or how about those books you got from Knockturn Ally? Did you ever find anything good in them?"
Chapter Title: Family Secrets
Words: 3074 Words
Harry had gotten up feeling rather good, despite the rough times he knew were ahead. He was still happy that Draco had managed to get into Grimmauld Place and after last night's meeting and him being elected official leader, he felt like things were starting to get done now, or at least like they could start to get done.
He was heading down into the kitchen with Draco now and he could hear voices in the room as he approached.
Hermione seemed to be cooking something, and Ron was towering over her.
"That's not the way my mum does it," Harry heard him say.
Hermione huffed.
“Morning all," said Harry, grinning and shaking his head at the couple by the cooker.
Draco hesitated at the door to the kitchen. At least these were people he was used to. He took what seemed to have become "his seat" at Harry's left side.
"Morning, Harry," said Hermione, sending Ron a slightly dark look.
"Where did everyone else go off to then?" asked Harry.
"Home," said Ron, and he eyed the pot on the stove again.
"It's not going to be perfect, Ron, so deal with it!" Hermione snapped, huffing again.
Ron rolled his eyes once Hermione had turned away from him and then he came and sat next to Harry. "She's trying to cook up the recipe Mum left for breakfast," he mumbled.
Harry snorted. "Smells alright," he said with a small shrug.
Remus came in yawning, then muttered his greeting before dropping into a seat at the end of the table.
Draco hid a smile by leaning his elbow on the table and putting his hand over his mouth. He looked about for tea, hoping someone had at least used magic for that.
"Tea's on the counter if anyone wants any," said Hermione a bit stiffly.
Draco looked around and then got up and went to make himself tea. "Anyone else?" he asked politely.
"Please," groaned Remus, rubbing his face.
"Two sugars," said Harry, smiling.
Draco made Harry's tea and set it down in front of him. "Sugar or milk?" he asked Remus.
"Black," the man responded and Draco set a cup in front of him, before returning to finish his own.
"Thanks, love," Harry said to Draco before turning to Lupin.
"Morning," he said, and then more quietly, "Are you still wanting to talk to me?"
Lupin slurped his tea and then sighed. "Yes, after breakfast."
Harry nodded and leaned back in his chair. "Anything in the Prophet today?" he asked.
Ron sighed. "Nothing new, mate," he said. "I suppose that would be good news if we didn't know the bastard's just waiting to spring something on us after Dumbledore's death."
Harry frowned slightly and nodded.
Draco nodded, sipping his sweet drink. "Not waiting, planning," he said quietly.
Harry raised an eyebrow. "Planning?" he asked.
Ron and Hermione looked at Draco too
"Waiting implies idleness." Draco sighed. "Planning is active. He is planning and preparing for something."
Harry furrowed his brow. "He's always planning something," he said bitterly.
"Are there scones?" Draco asked.
Harry shrugged.
"Mrs Weasley brought things from home last night and left them here. Everything she left is in that basket," said Hermione pointing.
Harry got to his feet and grabbed the basket for Draco and put it on the table in front of him.
Draco nodded. "Thanks," he said, and picked out a scone, piling the cream on.
"You staying long, Remus?" Harry asked Lupin, sipping his tea.
Remus shrugged. "Not sure, yet."
Harry nodded.
Hermione huffed from the stove. "Does anybody even want porridge besides Ron?" she asked.
"I actually was just going to make some toast," said Harry.
Draco raised an eyebrow at Harry and glanced up at Hermione, wondering if he should risk it or not.
Hermione sighed heavily and rolled her eyes. "I'm not making it anymore, Ron," she said. "You can just make it yourself."
Ron let out an indignant sound. "I don't know how to make it!" he said.
"Well you'll have to learn," said Hermione, dropping what she was doing and moving the pot off the burner.
"Who's going to make it if you don't?" asked Ron.
"You can," said Hermione dangerously.
"I can not, I'm not-"
"Not what? A female?!" said Hermione shrilly.
"It is too early for this," said Harry eyes wide.
Draco watched the argument like most people would watch a tennis match, smirking and clearly enjoying it.
Harry sighed and got to his feet. "Shut it you two," he said. "I know how to cook, so let's not argue over it, although Ron, if you are the only person who wants something, you should just learn to make it yourself, because I'm not going to wait on you."
Ron scowled. "How do you know how to cook?" he asked.
"I just do," said Harry, not really wanting to talk about the Dursleys. "Although I don't much feel like cooking right now. Just make some toast or eat something out of that basket and be happy."
Draco looked sideways at Harry considering and filing the information away for later.
The group finished with breakfast and Harry hung back a bit to wait for Lupin. He didn't know whether he minded if Draco was there or not.
Remus finished breakfast but seemed to be dawdling, avoiding what he needed to do. Finally, he looked up. "Harry, can we talk in the study?"
Harry frowned a bit and nodded. "Yeah, sure," he said. "I'll be back in a minute, okay?" he said to Draco.
Draco nodded and turned back to sit at the table, picking up The Daily Prophet.
Harry walked out of the kitchen and down the hall with Lupin. When they were in the study, he turned around to face the man and raised an eyebrow in question.
Lupin sat down in one of the reading chairs and motioned toward the other one. "Have a seat, Harry."
Harry sat down as well and rested his hands on his knees, his foot tapping nervously. He had a feeling that whatever Lupin wanted to tell him either wasn't good, or wouldn't make him happy.
"I'm worried about you, Harry," Remus said, shaking his head.
Well, Harry hadn't been expecting that. "Why?" he asked, eyebrows pulled together.
"This ... relationship you have with Draco," he sighed, "seems to be affecting your behaviour."
"What do you mean?" Harry asked slowly, brows still lowered.
"Well, first there was the incident after the wedding," Remus said. "I wouldn't expect that sort of thing from you."
Harry's eyes widened and he flushed. "Erm... well - I don't - ah, hmm," he said, although that wasn't really saying anything at all.
Remus shook his head. "And then there was the meeting yesterday."
Harry winced. "What...about that makes you worry about me... exactly?" he said, pained expression on his face.
"You seem less and less concerned with other people," Remus said. "Not just recently, but this year, it seems as if you have been obsessed with Malfoy, er, Draco."
Harry hesitated. "Well - I - I love him," he said. "I still care about everything else, but - I love him - erm, a lot - like, very, very much. I can't explain it." Harry looked at the floor, his face still red.
"Only three months ago, you hated him," Remus said. "And now you put him above others in everything."
Harry frowned now, but he didn't look up. "I know it sounds mad," he said, "but I can't help how I feel. I would die for him," he said quietly.
"I understand that such feelings can be intense, Harry," Remus said. "I have been in love before."
Harry looked up now. "Then why are you asking me this?" he said quietly. "If you've been in love, then you know I can't help it."
"You used your position yesterday to basically railroad the others into accepting Draco," Remus said.
"It would make everything far more complicated and we would be wasting time on something pointless if I didn't," said Harry a bit firmly now.
"Harry, can't you see how this looks to others?" Remus asked, leaning forward, his elbows on his knees.
Harry raised an eyebrow. "How does it look to others?" he asked, voice louder.
"First, you only agree to take the leadership role after Draco thinks you should. Then you give the other members no choice about his membership," Remus explained. "They are already suspicious of him."
"Are you saying they think he's controlling me or something?" Harry asked, sounding slightly angry now.
"I don't think he's controlling you, but others might." Remus sighed, leaning back. "I do worry, myself, that what is happening between the two of you is out of control."
Harry scowled. "Out of control? How is it out of control?"
"Harry, just try to give others time to get used to Draco." He closed his eyes. "And try to keep some sense of propriety."
"I know what's important," Harry said, eyes slightly narrowed. "I haven't forgotten what I need to do and, in fact, Draco and I were just talking about this the other day. We both understand that this isn't just about us. I know how huge this is."
"Good, Harry," Remus said. "I know I haven't been around much. I'm not Sirius, but I want you to remember that I care about you."
Harry stared at Lupin sadly for a moment. "I - I know," he said. He wondered what Sirius would say to all this. Wondered if Sirius would feel like Lupin if he were here.
Remus smiled tiredly at him. "I'm... glad you're happy, Harry. You deserve to be."
Harry gave a small smile. "I am happy. You have no idea how happy he makes me."
***
Draco waited, tea finished, and having read more of the Prophet than he wanted. He glanced nervously at the door. He finally got up and made his way around, looking at parts of the house that he hadn't had a chance to study yet. He found the Black family tree tapestry and stood looking at it.
Harry had left Lupin and gone back into the kitchen where Ron and Hermione were still sitting at the table.
"Where's Draco?" he asked, looking around the room.
Ron shrugged.
"I think he went to look around," said Hermione absently, reading a book.
Harry left the kitchen again and went looking around the house. He found Draco a few minutes later in the drawing room.
"Hey," he said quietly, coming up behind him and wrapping his arms about Draco's waist.
Draco sighed as Harry touched him. He didn't know exactly how, but he recognised Harry's footsteps without looking.
"What are you doing?" Harry asked, resting his chin on Draco's shoulder.
"My family has a similar one," Draco said quietly, still staring at the tapestry. "It's just odd to see my name here."
"Your mother was a Black," Harry said, remembering when Sirius had told him.
"See." Draco nodded, pointing at the tapestry.
Harry nodded too. "Draco... I know you haven't talked about your family or anything much, but... how - I mean - what would your mother do? Your father's in prison, but if they find your mum, will she be angry with you or anything?"
Draco snorted. "What would she do?" he asked aloud. "Whatever my Father told her."
"She doesn't - she doesn't care at all?" Harry asked quietly.
Draco thought about the question, his eyes still studying the tapestry. "It depends on what you mean by care, doesn't it?" he answered. "Do you mean would she challenge Father over me? Over something this... big? Not likely."
Harry was silent for a moment. "How do you feel about your parents?"
Draco tried to feel something about his parents. Mostly he felt empty. Was he hurt? Sad? Did he miss them? Probably, but mostly, "I feel scared."
Harry tightened his hold on Draco. "Scared because of what they'll do to you, or scared for them?"
"I think both," he said quietly.
Harry was silent again. He couldn't really relate to Draco at all, having never had parents. Even if he would have had parents, he was sure he'd probably never feel the way Draco felt about his. "I'm sure they love you," Harry said quietly, not knowing what else to say. "Didn't your mother make an Unbreakable Vow with Snape?"
"I think my mother cares what happens to me, yes," Draco said. "Does she have the power to do anything about it? Is she willing to defy my father? Especially now, after what I have done? I doubt it. Father will want me punished."
Harry frowned. "I won't let him touch you," he said quietly.
Draco nodded, understanding how Harry felt. "At the very least, I will be disowned, like Sirius was," he said.
Harry kissed the side of Draco's neck. "You'll always have me. It's all I can offer, but it's something at least."
Draco tore his eyes away from the tapestry and turned to face Harry. He cupped his hand along the other boy's jaw. "Best offer I have ever had." He smiled.
Harry smiled too. "I'm glad," he said softly.
"So what did the werewolf have to say?" Draco asked, glad to change the topic.
Harry sighed. "Apparently, I'm madly in love with you. Literally," he said.
Draco smirked. "I could have told him that."
Harry snorted. "He says he thinks I'm different now because of you... and oh, Merlin, he talked about us shagging during the wedding and last night! Maybe I really should stop being so loud..."
Draco laughed. "Gryffindors." He leaned in, licking at Harry's lips, then whispered, "Maybe he just misses Sirius."
Harry looked at Draco and raised an eyebrow. "Of course he does, they were best mates, but what does that have to do with anything?"
Draco chuckled darkly. "Yeah, they were close, or so I hear." He nipped at Harry's jaw.
Harry tilted his head to give Draco more room. "What do you mean?" he asked.
Tilting his head, Draco sucked and nibbled under Harry's jaw to his neck and ear. He licked Harry's ear and whispered across the wet, "You can't be that innocent still, not now."
Harry bit his lip and his eyes fell shut. He really didn't quite know what Draco was telling him, but then again, he couldn't really think with Draco licking him. "Draco, I really have no idea what you're-" but then Draco's words clicked and his eyes opened widely. "Are you saying Sirius and Lupin were - that they-"
"Mmhmm," Draco hummed against him, sucking on his neck right under and behind his ear.
"They never told me that!" Harry said indignantly. "And how on earth would you know?"
Draco pulled back, wincing. "Right here, Harry," he said. "No need to shout. And why would they tell you?"
"Because - well - Sirius was my godfather. I mean - you'd think he'd tell me something like that!" Harry said.
"Your godfather discussed his sex life with you?" Draco raised an eyebrow.
"Well, no, but it would be more than just a sex life wouldn't it? I never even - I mean - they never acted like they were together..." But now that Harry thought of it, thought back to how Remus and Sirius acted around each other... it sort of made sense. "How would you know something like that and not me?"
"You Gryffindors seem to have a very provincial attitude toward sex." Draco sighed. "Just look at all the comments your friends made about us."
Harry thought and then nodded. "Yeah, I guess." He was overcome with a sudden sadness. "Lupin said that he had been in love when he spoke to me... do you think it was Sirius he was talking about?" he asked quietly.
Draco frowned. "That's the rumour, at least."
Harry didn't say anything for a while. He just stood there and stared at Draco's nose instead of his eyes. Lupin had seen Sirius die, had held Harry back from running to Sirius and Harry hadn't even paid Lupin any attention at all, hadn't cared about how he had felt. If what Draco was saying was true... Harry couldn't even imagine... "Oh, Merlin... I - how must he feel if that's true? Listening to us and - seeing us... I feel awful now. I couldn't imagine being without you."
Draco stiffened. He really hadn't thought about that either. "Yes, but it also means he probably understands more about how we feel than you realised."
Harry frowned and moved forward to hug Draco. "He saw him die, Draco. He saw him get killed. I ran after Sirius and he pulled me back, when all he probably wanted to do was - And I didn't even - Merlin."
Draco pulled Harry over to the sofa and sat him down, sitting beside him. "I didn't know," he said.
Harry stared at his legs. "I don't even know what to say," he whispered. "All I can think is... what if that happened to one of us - I wouldn't even - I just - I don't know what to say."
Draco took a deep breathe. "He hasn't told you, so what can you say?"
Harry gave a weak shrug. "Nothing, I just feel so awful now, you know?" He sighed ad leaned back into the couch. "I miss Sirius so much... but it must be nothing compared to how much Lupin misses him."
Draco nodded, thinking about it too. He realised it explained a few things he had wondered about. He was related to Sirius but never knew him. Never heard anything good about him. Draco sighed, wrapping his hand up around Harry's head so that he held him against his shoulder.
Harry sat on the sofa and was quiet for a while, just resting against Draco. He sighed again. "Enough of this, yeah?" he asked, sitting up more so that he was level with Draco's face.
Draco smiled a little sadly but nodded. "What then?" he asked.
Harry hugged Draco again and said into his ear, "We could look through the books in the house - or, well - you could, and then maybe tell me what to look for. Or how about those books you got from Knockturn Ally? Did you ever find anything good in them?"