Sweet Soul Music

Disclaimer – The places and characters you recognise are JK Rowlings

Chapter Twenty Two.

It took a while for the disorientation to wear off and the sound of Jack Johnson slowly began to filter through to her ears. Severus was sat naked with the other version of herself, the candlelight growing dimmer. The conversation they were having was becoming audible now.
“Well, I suppose I could come with you if you wanted?”
“Oh no, there is really no need I’ll only be gone for one night”
She watched in silence as the two of them said their goodnights. The image of herself was beginning to blur, of course this was his mind she had to stay with him, so she followed the potions master down the hallway. The hallways were silent except for his thoughts which she could hear plainly.
“Why did she not want me to go with her?” the thought kept coming back to him over and over.

Cat followed him down to the darker dungeon corridors, listening intently as he went over different things in his head.
“Is she ashamed to be seen with me?” it suddenly dawned on her that perhaps Snape wasn’t as emotionless as everybody believed; the insecurity in his mind was almost tangible.
“There has to be something, she didn’t even consider letting me accompany her.” this seemed to now be the overruling thought. Maybe she had been a bit quick on the come back, but she was so excited about seeing her friends and telling them about her new lover. She couldn’t very well discuss Severus while he was with her. She followed him into his bedroom. Trying to not be too distracted as he undressed she focused instead on his thoughts. He was wrestling with a lot of different emotions and it all centred on her, it became obvious that sleep didn’t come to him that night as the image adjusted itself round her.

Using the opportunity Cat reflected on what she had seen so far. Her quick dismissal of his offer had made him even more insecure and led him to believe she was hiding something from him. The image came back into focus around her again, this time they were stood in the corridor.
“I was wondering if perhaps you would join me in my rooms this evening for a drink” he said quietly when they where out of earshot of the other staff.
“I’m so sorry Severus but I’m afraid that I can’t. I have something I have to do for the headmaster tonight and an early train to catch in the morning.”
His thought rang out loud and clear.
“She’s avoiding me. She is definitely hiding something” it seemed angry and pained at the same time.
“Maybe last night wasn’t good enough, maybe I’m not good enough” he was beginning to doubt himself now. If only she had known this, she would have made time for him, rather than cause all these doubts. Still, this didn’t excuse his behaviour.

The image changed again, lingering briefly on Severus in his rooms, alone except for a bottle of whisky, he had obviously drunk a fair portion of the bottle by this point she noticed. His thoughts were jumbled, he kept referring to a plan and it was the only way to be certain. The image never came fully into focus and was only short. It lasted long enough for her to hear one more thing
“I can’t be. It’s far too soon to know that”
The edges blurred again. Was he falling for her the same way she was falling for him? No, it couldn’t be that she told herself as she looked at the new surroundings. She was on the train heading for London, how the hell could he remember this, he wasn’t there. The only person there was the blond, she looked at him closely. It was glamour, the bastard was following her.

He had followed her all day and she hadn’t realised it, sneaky, very sneaky. She was caught between two conflicting emotions, again. He hadn’t trusted her and she was furious because of that, he had no right to be stalking her this way. She was an independent woman and not his property; there could be no justification for this. Cat’s other voice popped into her mind.
“You heard how insecure he was, how he was starting to feel towards you. Listen to him.” she gave in and listened to his inner ramblings as he sat in the coffee shop opposite her flat.
“Perhaps she is having a night in, maybe I could just knock on the door? Would she be happy to see me?” he did have feelings for her then.
“This is all well and good but it doesn’t explain what you said on Sunday” she said out loud unsure if he would be aware of her voice. It seemed he was because the memory shifted again.

Help me; you broke apart my insides,
Help me; I’ve got no soul to sell...
Help me: The only thing that works for me,
Help me get away from myself…

It was in the club, and Cat found herself watching Severus, watching her. He was transfixed by her movements and appearance, several explicit thoughts on his mind. It was difficult not to be flattered by this. He watched as she mouthed the words quietly, her eyes closed. The lyrics seemed to be heightening his desire for her and she could see it burning in the eyes of his memory. Then all of a sudden his expression froze, slowly becoming one of unbearable pain, she followed his gaze to the other Cat on the dance floor, already knowing what was happening. She was dancing with Stuart.
“I was right, she is hiding something. How could she let me think that I could be anything to her?” His mind screamed as he stormed out of the club. He was feeling angry and betrayed, how could she intentionally hurt him so much? He couldn’t bear the thought of seeing her again.
“I have to shut her out.”