The Burden of Memory

Authors Note: Many thanks to my beta Shannon! I know it's been a while since I've updated this one, and I'm afraid this one is rather short. I've been getting some help on working in a new direction and this chapter serves to bridge it together. It's almost finished.

Chapter 21 Bars Cannot Hold

The patrons of the Admiral’s Arms kept stealing glances to a table in the back where a motley crew sat in whispered discussion. They had been there for nearly an hour going over Draco’s memories and trying to figure out what to do next.

“I’ll see what I can do,” Hermione noted firmly as she scribbled down the names of the gentleman Harry and Draco told her about. They had summoned her early that morning, but she hadn’t been able to pull away from her meeting until lunchtime, so they all arranged to meet at the nearby muggle pub.

Ron and Lara were sitting adjacent to her while Harry and Draco sat across the table from them. Ron was as delightful to eat with as ever; stuffing his face with the contents of his plate as well as any others within reach, while Lara looked on with amusement. Harry had only eaten half of his Sheppard’s pie, while Draco dabbed chips in vinegar and then stared at them nervously, as if the wily potato would attack him somehow. Hermione on the other hand finished a light salad and had already shoved it aside in lieu of space for her notebook.

“I think I’ve seen that Grubner fellow in the building before. He works on one of the lower floors I believe, but I often see him on my floor,” she recalled.

“He’s probably snooping on you,” Ron muttered through a mouthful of Rueben.

“Thanks, Ron. I’ve already deduced that much. Where did you meet with him, Draco? Can you recall?” she asked, preparing to jot down whatever he said.

“The office had no windows, and it was rather dank,” he remembered. “I can’t recall coming or going though, so it could’ve been anywhere.”

“Very helpful,” Ron muttered, but was promptly cut off with an elbow to the rib courtesy of Lara.

“Stop being rude,” she demanded firmly and Ron sheepishly nodded before going back to his sandwich. “So this Grubner, do you think he’s behind it all, or just another lowlife following orders from higher up?” she asked, turning her attention back to the group now that her boyfriend was behaving.

“That’s what we’ll need to figure out. I can’t bring this to the Minister until I find out how high up it goes. It’ll be easy enough to get Grubner sent away, but if he’s only the bottom of the totem pole, it’ll alert anyone else involved that we’re onto them,” Hermione reasoned.

“Which could make them come after us even harder,” Draco muttered, rubbing his leg against Harry’s under the table. Despite his casual mood the night before, the more and more he thought about what Grubner had wanted to do, the more worried he grew for Harry’s safety.

“Or it could make them rush and make a mistake,” Harry countered.

“Too risky,” Hermione replied. “This could be bigger than all of us, Harry.”

“Fine, so what do we do?” he asked, letting his hand fall over Draco’s, which was clutching violently at Harry’s knee.

“We locate Grubner and his associate and try to see what they know,” Hermione stated clearly. “Then, based on what they say we either go to the Minister or we investigate further. Either way though you have to stay out of it, Harry. They can’t know where you are.”

Harry was about to protest, but Lara interrupted him with a question of her own. “Is it possible that your Minister is involved?”

“Odder things have happened, but I think Kingsley’s innocent on this one. He worked pretty closely with Harry during the war, and I don’t think he has a reason to want him unjustly imprisoned,” Hermione replied.

“So, I’m just supposed to sit around and wait?” Harry demanded, changing the subject altogether. He didn’t like their idea one bit, not when it kept him looking over his shoulder and wondering what was going to happen. Harry liked to be in control of his life, not cowering in his flat and hiding from bad guys.

“Yes,” the table answered him unanimously.

“That’s exactly what you’re going to do,” Hermione added. “Stay in as much as you can, let us know if you see anything suspicious and don’t do anything stupid.”

“We’ll keep an eye on him, Mione,” Lara noted, pointing to her own eyes and then back at Harry.

“I’m not a child,” Harry muttered, rolling his eyes at the lot of them. He didn’t need a babysitter.

“Why don’t you let your friends protect you, Harry? You’ve already died to save us, let us help you for once,” Hermione pleaded.

It wasn’t so much Hermione’s impromptu speech as it was Draco’s fearful eyes that made Harry finally agree, but in the end that was exactly what he did. “Fine,” he muttered, making it clear to everyone at the table how much it pained him to give in, but for Draco’s peace of mind he could be house bound for a few days. He would just make sure that Draco made the stay worth his while.

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“But Hermione said I need to stay here at the flat,” Harry whined, arms crossed firmly over his chest.

“The Manor will be perfectly safe, and you were just complaining this morning how boring it is just sitting around here all day. I promised mother we would come to dinner,” Draco told him, trying to pry Harry’s arms apart so that he could go back to snuggling him. They had been lounging in bed when Draco brought it up, and suddenly Harry had gone from soft and snuggly to rigid and obstinate.

“What am I supposed to say to your mother? Hi, remember me, that boy you saved in the forest, well now I’m shagging your son,” Harry grumbled.

“She already knows we’re shagging, Harry,” Draco replied, trying to calm him down. It had the opposite effect, however.

“What?” Harry shouted, scrambling out of bed and pulling on a pair of cotton trousers. “What do you mean she already knows? You told her?”

“It’s not as though I told her which way you like me to rotate my tongue, or that you’re a screamer, Harry. She’s a seer after all, she probably knew we were going to be together before we did,” Draco explained.

Harry let his face fall into his hands and he looked as if he were trying to remove the skin from it. “I just don’t think I can face her! Or your father, Merlin your father is going to Avada me!”

“Harry, stop talking so lowly of my parents. They already like you, you have nothing to worry over,” Draco cooed, trying to pull Harry back into bed.

“Already like me? Draco your father has been present several times at my near execution,” Harry replied briskly.

“That was all for Voldemort, and now you’ve killed him, thus making you the most powerful wizard in England. My dad’s a highest bidder kind of guy,” Draco replied, a twinge of teasing on his lips.

“Highest bidder? What happens when that becomes someone else?” Harry asked bitterly.

“Then we rely on the fact that father always listens to mother and my mother adores you. She’s already seen us moving into the Manor with them and getting married,” Draco told him.

Harry’s mouth went suddenly slack, and no matter what he did, it didn’t seem to want to obey him. A cool sense of dread flooded Draco’s body as he thought he might have said to much and scared his lover away.

“It’s no big deal, Harry,” Draco tried to assure him. “I’ll tell her I’m not feeling well, we’ll reschedule.”

“Is that what you want?” Harry asked, his voice a bare and nearly silent whisper.

“I just want to make you happy, Harry. If you’re not ready to formally meet my parents as my boyfriend then we’ll do it another time,” Draco offered.

“No, not dinner. Marriage. Do you want to marry me?” Harry asked, his voice cracking at the end.

“Not right now, obviously,” Draco chuckled, then his face turned a bit more serious and he looked intently at his fidgeting boyfriend. “But I love you, Harry, so yes, at some point I could see that in the cards for us. How about you?”

“I-“ Harry began, but his mouth snapped shut and all he could do was stare at Draco with dumbfounded eyes.

“Okay, too soon, I get it,” Draco muttered, feeling like an arse for bringing it up. He pulled the sheets up to cover himself, feeling exposed and vulnerable under Harry’s wide and probing gaze.

With a blur Harry leapt and knocked Draco back to the bed with a rough growl. Draco raised his arms up to prevent the attack until he realized that Harry was showering him with heated passionate kisses. “What-“ Draco asked, unsure what to make of this new and slightly neurotic development.

Harry straddled him and placed a deep kiss on his lips before running his fingers through Draco’s flaxen hair. “I love you, Draco. I would marry you this very minute.”

“But you won’t visit my parents?” Draco teased.

“I could be persuaded, I suppose,” Harry reasoned, tapping his cheek to get a kiss from his lover.

Draco instantly obliged and purred in his ear. “I can be very persuasive.”

“I suspected as much,” Harry teased. “But don’t you think we should be doing something? I can’t just have a civil meal with your parents while all this mess looms over our heads. Is there any other memory you’ve discovered, anything else that might help?”

Draco sighed and pushed Harry gently off of him. “I knew you wouldn’t be able to just stay here with me,” he replied glumly. “What if something happens to you?”

“So you do know something else?” Harry asked suspiciously, propping himself up on his elbows while Draco pulled himself out of bed and glared down at his boyfriend.

“No, I just-“ he began, unable to meet Harry’s eyes. “I just want to know what made me change my mind at the last minute. What did I find that made me refuse Grubner’s offer? It’s not as if I talked to you right before I lost my memory, right?”

“Right,” Harry replied hesitantly. “I think we should go back to Hogwarts,” he announced at last.

Draco merely narrowed his eyes. “You wanted no part in that just a few days ago. Why do you want to go now?”

“I’ve had time to think about it,” he replied with an innocent grin, but Draco wasn’t fooled.

“Harry James Potter I am not going to let you go off and get yourself killed just because you’re bored!” Draco chastised, sounding like an odd combination of Hermione and Lucius. It made Harry cringe slightly but he pressed on.

“This could be the final piece to the puzzle though,” Harry offered as if dangling a chocolate frog on a string. “And it’s not as though we’ll be waltzing through the Ministry. Hogwarts is safe, the safest even, maybe even safer than here,” he reasoned.

“Have I ever told you that Gryffindor’s are an insufferable bunch?” Draco muttered.

“You might have mentioned it, but I think the theory is weak and unfounded,” Harry replied with an air or Ravenclaw seeping through.

“Fine. We’ll go to Hogwarts, but if Hermione finds out I’m telling her to put a wand to my head!” Draco replied firmly. “I think we should maybe take the echo potion though, it might give me a better idea as to where to begin.”

“How long will it take for you to brew it?” Harry asked, knowing he wouldn’t be much help in that particular process.

Draco turned around and rummaged in his nightstand before tossing a small glass vial to Harry. “A Slytherin is always prepared.”

“I see,” Harry muttered, eyeing the thin blue liquid speculatively. With a deep breath he uncorked it and downed the potion in one gulp before Draco could shout ‘Harry wait!’.

“What?” he asked, feeling a little woozy.

Draco merely sighed and shook his head in mild annoyance. “I was going to suggest we wait until we get on the grounds.”

“Oh,” Harry replied sheepishly, but then his eyes went wide as a misty version of his own body lay nude and sprawled out on the bed beside him. The ghost-like Harry’s breathing was coming in short heavy bursts and when he pulled his eyes away from the figment he knew why. A dripping wet Draco was crawling across the bed right toward him and it was all the corporeal Harry could do not to reach out.

“What the hell is going on?” Draco asked, panic tingeing his voice. He worried he might have messed up the potion.

“I see us,” Harry whispered. “Our first time together. Damn we’re hot.”

Draco laughed and drank his own potion as he blinked and waited for the same vision. Sure enough, just as Harry had mentioned, there were the transparent versions of them sweating and moaning on the bed. “Is it wrong that I want to fuck you next to the memory of us fucking?” Draco asked after he was able to catch his breath.

Harry laughed and shook his head. “I hope not, because that’s exactly what I’m thinking.” His boyfriend began stalking closer, running his hands up Harry’s legs.

“This is the best porn ever,” Draco groaned and Harry let his head loll back and smiled at his lover’s touch.

“How much more of that potion do you have?” Harry asked dreamily.

“Er…” Draco replied and paused, not wanting to stop but knowing where this conversation was leading.

Harry’s head snapped up and he pouted. “You don’t have anymore do you?” he asked and Draco shook his head. “I guess we better get our hot arses to Hogwarts then,” he sighed with a slight grin.

“I’m making more of this potion,” Draco resolved before clutching Harry tightly as they apparated directly into Hogsmeade.

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Authors Note: Who wants to take the echo potion in Harry's bedroom?