More Ways to Kill A Weasley
folder
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Snape/Hermione
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
29
Views:
18,438
Reviews:
69
Recommended:
1
Currently Reading:
1
Category:
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Snape/Hermione
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
29
Views:
18,438
Reviews:
69
Recommended:
1
Currently Reading:
1
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Snape's Cure for Stupidity
Snape's Cure for Stupidity
Snape was always advertising for human test subjects for his Potions. A lot of the younger crowd supplemented their incomes in this manner, after signing a waiver that absolved Snape of any responsibility for any negative results. So far, no one had suffered more than a bit of discomfort.
Snape had decided that one of the worst maladies in the world today was stupidity. It was all-compassing and could even be passed down from person to person. It was also communicable. The stupidest ideas could be perpetuated almost eternally once introduced into society. And no matter how idiotic the idea was, there was some arsehole out there ready to believe it.
So Snape had worked on a potion to stop stupidity in all its forms. It was very frustrating work, and after five years of intense experimentation, Snape realized that the cure was much simpler than he initially believed. It was a bit unconventional, but—there was an epidemic.
Imagine the Potions master's surprise when Ronald Weasley turned up as a test subject. Weasley was dating his apprentice, Hermione Granger. Snape thought it a very bad match, but Hermione was stubborn and loyal to a fault. Despite the obvious unsuitability, she continued to see Ron.
Snape gave Ron the waiver, and he filled it out.
"Wow, one hundred Galleons? I ought to do this for a living," Ron said to the dour wizard.
Snape didn't say anything as he poured the potion into a cup.
"What's it supposed to do?" Ron asked him as he took it, peering down to see the contents. It was a pink liquid that smelled a bit like bubblegum.
"Cure stupidity," Snape replied.
"Oh. Well, that's good," Ron said, toasting the wizard with the cup and drinking the potion down.
He smacked his lips.
"Mmm. It tastes all right," Ron said as Snape waited.
He didn't have to wait long.
"Arrrgh!" Ron cried, clutching his chest for a moment, and then keeling over.
Snape blinked down at him, then checked his pulse.
There was none.
Snape then smirked at the dead beau of Hermione Granger.
"Success," he purred, picking up the waiver with a flourish.
He'd need that.
******************************************
A/N: This wasn't really about Ron for me. My grandson's mother R* did something INCREDIBLY stupid and I was just writing out my frustration. Lol. Thanks for reading.
Snape was always advertising for human test subjects for his Potions. A lot of the younger crowd supplemented their incomes in this manner, after signing a waiver that absolved Snape of any responsibility for any negative results. So far, no one had suffered more than a bit of discomfort.
Snape had decided that one of the worst maladies in the world today was stupidity. It was all-compassing and could even be passed down from person to person. It was also communicable. The stupidest ideas could be perpetuated almost eternally once introduced into society. And no matter how idiotic the idea was, there was some arsehole out there ready to believe it.
So Snape had worked on a potion to stop stupidity in all its forms. It was very frustrating work, and after five years of intense experimentation, Snape realized that the cure was much simpler than he initially believed. It was a bit unconventional, but—there was an epidemic.
Imagine the Potions master's surprise when Ronald Weasley turned up as a test subject. Weasley was dating his apprentice, Hermione Granger. Snape thought it a very bad match, but Hermione was stubborn and loyal to a fault. Despite the obvious unsuitability, she continued to see Ron.
Snape gave Ron the waiver, and he filled it out.
"Wow, one hundred Galleons? I ought to do this for a living," Ron said to the dour wizard.
Snape didn't say anything as he poured the potion into a cup.
"What's it supposed to do?" Ron asked him as he took it, peering down to see the contents. It was a pink liquid that smelled a bit like bubblegum.
"Cure stupidity," Snape replied.
"Oh. Well, that's good," Ron said, toasting the wizard with the cup and drinking the potion down.
He smacked his lips.
"Mmm. It tastes all right," Ron said as Snape waited.
He didn't have to wait long.
"Arrrgh!" Ron cried, clutching his chest for a moment, and then keeling over.
Snape blinked down at him, then checked his pulse.
There was none.
Snape then smirked at the dead beau of Hermione Granger.
"Success," he purred, picking up the waiver with a flourish.
He'd need that.
******************************************
A/N: This wasn't really about Ron for me. My grandson's mother R* did something INCREDIBLY stupid and I was just writing out my frustration. Lol. Thanks for reading.