It Was Only A Kiss!

Sorry, sorry!! Thanks to all who've reviewed and to my anon reviewer for pleading so beautifully and reminding me to post. I'm catching you guys up with LJ by posting all but the final chapter now. The last chapter will be posted later today so you won't have to wait long at all. Remember to let me know what you think of it.

Chapter Nineteen

A week later

‘Oh Sweet Merlin, Remus!’

Remus grinned proudly around Sirius' shaft as his finger brushed over the small bundle of nerves he'd been searching for deep inside the other boy. The Animagus swore loudly then arced off the bed as if he'd been electrocuted as Remus stimulated the tissue again. Remus' mouth slipped off his cock as he moved, and Sirius let out a cry of protest, reaching out to grasp handfuls of silky brown hair.

'Bloody, buggering hell!' he gasped frantically, trying to drag Remus' mouth back to his groin. 'Don't fucking stop now!'

He tugged insistently at the locks and Remus, with a yelp of pain and a glare at the brunette, lowered his head. Sirius sighed as the hot, wet mouth surrounded him once more, tongue dipping into the tiny, leaking slit at the tip and making him groan. Remus thrummed his finger against the sensitive gland, almost gagging as Sirius' hips leapt off the bed with each pass, forcing his dick further into Remus' throat than was comfortable.

Working the head of Sirius' cock with his tongue - the way he knew drove Sirius completely insane - Remus was soon rewarded with a choked, 'Fuck, Moony!' before he had to swallow fast as Sirius' orgasm broke in waves over him.

Pleased with himself, Remus licked the softening cock clean as Sirius collapsed back onto the bed, panting hard and whimpering from the pain-pleasure sensation of soft muscle stroking over-sensitive flesh. He carefully withdrew his fingers from the other boy’s slick back passage and reached for his wand to clean them up, his own earlier release still sticky on his stomach. He smirked down at the sated and completely limp body spread across his bed.

‘I found it then?’ he asked smugly and Sirius nodded slowly.

‘Uh huh,’ he murmured faintly.

Remus waved his wand and cast the Scourgify, snickering at the expression of stunned bliss on the other boy's face.

‘Told you it was good,' Remus said and Sirius smiled lazily.

‘Mmm,' he agreed, then said, 'Hard to find though. You were fiddling around for ages.’

Remus frowned at this slight on his efforts. ‘Yeah, well, I know where it is now,' he muttered, throwing his wand back onto the side table.

‘Yes, you do,' Sirius agreed with a leer, but Remus was distracted by the leaking tube next to his wand.

‘And I won’t use as much of that lube next time,' he mused aloud, frowning at the clear gel. 'It made everything too slippery...and it's gotten every-bloody-where.'

‘Remus, stop analysing this,' Sirius said impatiently. 'You did a fucking marvellous job of fingering my arse. Now come and give me a hug, you mutt.'

‘Merlin, you can be foul sometimes,' Remus complained half-heartedly and Sirius laughed as he pulled the werewolf down on top of him.

'I know,' he mumbled into Remus' hair. 'Me? Cuddling? It's revolting, an abhorrence, an abomination...'

Remus kissed him smack on the lips to shut him up, then grinned as Sirius nuzzled his face into the crook of his neck, kissing the spot where neck met shoulder.

They curled around each other, loosened bodies touching in so many places it was impossible to tell where one ended and the other began. Limbs were like lead, draped over and under and around; they felt heavy with satisfaction and pleasant exhaustion, yet as light as air at the same time.

Sirius sighed contentedly.

This is what happy feels like.

‘Why didn’t we do this a long time ago, Moony?’he asked softly, his lips dragging over Remus' sweat-salty skin.

‘Coz we were straight?’ Remus suggested sardonically.

Sirius snorted as he stretched his repleted body then wrapped his leg around Remus’, rubbing his big toe up and down his lover‘s calf.

‘It seems like another lifetime that I was shagging girls,' he admitted, flattening a hand over Remus' pectoral muscle and skimming it down the other boy's chest. 'I can’t imagine doing it now.’

‘Mmm, me either,' Remus agreed, yawning. 'You've ruined me for girls.'

Sirius laughed softly and drew Remus closer. ‘Wonder why it took so long to work out that this...' He tightened his arms around Remus' waist. '...is what we wanted?’

Remus shrugged and said flippantly, ‘Maybe we just needed some Firewhiskey to bring it out?’

‘We should write to the manufacturers and thank them,' Sirius suggested with a smile.

Remus chuckled and shifted, fitting his body along the angles of Sirius’. They slotted together like puzzle pieces now - as if they’d been made for the other.

They lay in companionable silence for several minutes then Sirius spoke softly, ‘You seemed happy after you opened that letter from your dad tonight.’

Remus started a little, jerking out of his light doze and nodded. ‘He said he’d like you to come and stay at ours for a while after school finishes. He wants to “get to know you better”,' he said, his index finger absently tracing patterns on Sirius’ chest.

Sirius raised an eyebrow. ‘Should I be worried he’s going to greet me with an Avada Kedavra for turning his heterosexual son into a flaming queer?’

‘No,' Remus said with a small smile. 'He said that he isn’t quite comfortable with us yet, but…’

He swallowed hard and irritably blinked back the tears he thought had finally dried up.

‘He told me that when mum’s parents first met him, they didn’t want her to marry him. They thought her life would be too hard with someone so different from what they knew - a wizard.' He took a deep breath. 'Dad said she took his hand and told them that she loved him and was going to marry him with or without their blessing. She said, "The heart wants what it wants and it can’t be dictated to".’

Sirius smiled up at Remus. ‘Sounds like something your mum would say,' he said.

'Mmm,' Remus murmured, lost in his own thoughts.

Sirius saw the sadness flickering over the werewolf's face and kissed his jaw lightly. 'That wasn't a hint that you want me to propose, was it?' he joked in an attempt to distract the other boy. 'Because I think you should know that I've already had several offers and I have to consider them all to be fair. Although, the fact you give the most fantastic head works well in your favour...'

Remus chuckled softly and hit him on the bicep. 'Shut up, you tosser.'

Sirius let out a sharp amused exhale then, after a slight hesitation, Remus whispered, 'Thanks, Pads.'

Sirius felt the tension that had crept back into Remus' previously relaxed body and ran his hands soothingly over the werewolf's too-prominent shoulder blades, trying to ease the hurt he still carried.

‘Moony?’ he asked softly and Remus shook his head.

‘I’m alright,' he said, unconvincingly and Sirius frowned.

‘Are you sure?' he asked, turning his face into Remus' hair and breathing in the scent of the soft locks. 'You can have a cry if you like. You know I feel all manly when you sob all over me.’

Remus smiled and wiped away the tear that had leaked from the corner of his eye. ‘No, she wouldn’t want me to keep blubbering over her,' he said, clearing his throat. 'I’ve done my crying. I want to remember the good times now and smile about them.’

Sirius tightened an arm around him and asked tentatively, ‘Would…would she have liked this, do you think? Us?’

Remus paused. ‘She liked you…’ he began, but Sirius interrupted.

‘I was just your mate then, Moony,' he reminded him. 'Things change when the male friend of your son becomes his lover.’

Remus considered this. ‘She’d probably tell me to make sure I was certain - about my sexuality and about you - but…yes…I think she would have understood and supported us.’

Sirius smiled, his eyelashes tickling the skin on Remus’ cheek as he closed his eyes in relief. ‘I’m glad,' he said fervently. 'I really liked your mum.’

Remus turned his face and brushed his lips over the other boy’s prickly jaw before he asked hesitantly, ‘Do you think you’ll ever tell your parents?’

Sirius sighed heavily, Remus feeling his chest expand then deflate under his own before the brunette spoke.

‘My parents believe the heart is a useless organ, worn on the sleeves of the weak. They’ll tell me to force myself to turn my back on my ‘abnormality’, straighten up and fly right. I’m such a disappointment to them already - the only hope they still hold out for me is that I’ll marry well and help Reg provide them with the next generation of Blacks.'

He laughed abruptly, no trace of amusement in the bark. 'Me being a poof will put paid to that dream.’

'You could still...' Remus said, but Sirius interrupted.

'No, I couldn't,' Sirius said firmly. 'The thought of being with a bird instead of you does nothing to me that is conducive to making babies.'

Remus smiled weakly and Sirius sighed.

‘I try not to think about what they’d do if they ever found out,' he admitted. 'I think I’ll just…distance myself from them…might have to keep it a bit quiet…’

Remus felt a pulling in his chest. He didn’t want to come out or have anyone other than their friends knowing about them at the moment, but he didn’t want to live more than one lie for the rest of his life either. Being a werewolf was bad enough, but not being able to be honest about his sexuality... that was a secret Remus wasn't willing to keep under wraps as well.

Neither he nor Sirius had yet broached what would happen to them after school finished. Remus had hoped they would continue their relationship, but if they had to shroud themselves in secrecy all the time…

Perhaps school yard romances weren't meant to be carried on to the outside world.

The real world.

They lay in a contemplative silence for a few minutes longer, then Sirius wriggled out from underneath Remus and smiled down at him.

‘I’m hungry,' he announced and Remus grinned.

‘I am too,' he said, grateful for the distraction.

Sirius slapped him playfully on the thigh then stood up. 'Come on then, my randy wolf,' he said with a broad smile. 'Let's find a different kind of meat for you to gnaw on.'

They dressed quickly then Sirius tiptoed over to James' trunk to borrow the Invisibility Cloak, both boys struggling to hold back guffaws when they heard James murmuring, 'Oh, yeah, Lily. That's the spot,' in his sleep.

Under the cloak, they managed to avoid detection by a patrolling Prefect and snuck into the kitchen. The house elves were thrilled to see their most frequent visitors, even this late at night, and stoked the fire before plying the couple with cakes and sandwiches. The boys ate their late night snack next to the warm fireplace, talking quietly about their upcoming NEWTS then headed back to their common room, a revived Sirius teasing Remus by groping various body parts along the way.

‘Stop it,' Remus hissed, shifting under the cloak to evade a wandering hand.

Sirius chuckled, low and deep in his throat, and Remus whimpered at the sound. ‘You’re just too sexy to keep my hands off, Moony,' he growled, lips brushing over the shell of Remus' ear.

‘Idiot,' Remus muttered without any real annoyance then he slapped at the hand that slid over the curve of his buttock.

‘Pads, get your hand off my arse,' he admonished weakly and Sirius sensed victory.

‘Why?’

‘Someone will see,' Remus argued, his words punctuated with a soft moan as Sirius seemed to grow extra hands, touching him all over.

‘No one’s around and we‘re under the cloak,' Sirius reminded him then, with a smirk, slid his hand around the werewolf's body to cup his balls.

‘Padfoot!’

Sirius gasped as, seconds after his hand touched Remus’ groin, he found himself with his back pressed against the cold stone wall and a mouthful of talented werewolf tongue. The cloak slid unnoticed to the floor as Sirius growled in approval of the other boy’s actions and gripped Remus’ hips tight, pulling him closer.

The werewolf smiled against his lips then ground his hips teasingly against the Animagus’, the movement setting Sirius on fire as their rapidly hardening cocks were helped along by the friction of the motion.

Sirius moaned and tore his mouth away with a gasp, dragging his lips across the scarred cheek of his lover to whisper hoarsely in his ear, ‘I want you to fuck me, Remus.’

Remus pulled back, staring at Sirius’ shadowed face in surprise. ‘Y...you do?’

‘Yes.’

‘Now?’

‘Yes.’

‘Here?’

‘I think I could possibly wait till we get back to the dorm,' Sirius said with a smile.

A shuddering breath reeking of anticipation and a little apprehension escaped from Remus’ trembling lips as he asked, ‘Are...are you sure?’

‘Didn’t you hear me screaming under you earlier tonight?' Sirius teased gently. 'I want to be inside you, Remus. I want you inside me. I don’t mind which way we do it - who fucks who - I just want us to be together. Really together.’

Heat streaked through the brown-haired boy and he made a strangled noise in his throat before latching his mouth onto Sirius’ neck, sucking the skin into his mouth hard then mumbling into the hot skin...

‘Fucking hell, I want that too.’

Sirius moaned softly as the desperation in Remus' voice then a hand tangled in the werewolf’s hair and pulled his head back. Remus went with the pressure, his head lifting, and Sirius immediately claimed his mouth roughly, spinning them around so now he was pressing Remus hard into the wall. The kiss deepened and the hall filled with the sound of ragged breathing and cut off moans of pleasure.

‘Oh my god!’

Despite their preoccupation with each other’s lips, Remus and Sirius heard the whisper as if it had been shouted in their ears. Sirius moved like lightening away from Remus, spinning to confront the interloper.

Regulus Black stared at them through eyes like flint. He shot a disbelieving look at Remus then his face changed, disgust evident as his cold grey eyes turned to his brother.

‘You’re a fucking faggot?’ he sneered derisively.

Remus watched Sirius’ face turn from defiant to furious as the viciously spat slur echoed around the cavernous corridor. As Sirius took a step toward his brother, Remus stepped in front of him.

‘Don’t,' he said firmly and Regulus’ lip curled in a snarl.

‘Stay out of it, werewolf!’ he snapped.

Sirius gasped and Remus’ heart stuttered then started to beat double time, sending blood roaring through his veins as he looked into the scornful face which was so like that of his best friend and lover. Sirius stepped closer, cupping Remus’ elbow supportively.

‘H…how…did you...?’

Regulus sneered at his stammering sibling. ‘I’m not stupid. You and your thick-headed Gryffindors' worked it out; I don‘t know why you thought I wouldn‘t. I just watched him closely and put two and two together.' He smiled nastily. 'Did you think our parents wouldn’t ask me to keep them informed about who you were aligning yourself with?’

Sirius paled and Remus made a noise in his throat like a kicked puppy. ‘They know Remus is…?’

‘No,' Regulus admitted, much to Sirius and Remus' relief. 'They would have had him expelled, or killed, by now if they did.’

Sirius made another aggressive movement towards Regulus as he spoke so casually about Remus being murdered, but Remus once again stopped him. Regulus smiled - an unpleasant version of Sirius’ charming grin.

‘Yes, I’ve been saving that little bit of information for a special occasion,' he taunted, knowing he was hitting a raw nerve. 'I think the time may have arrived, though, to inform our parents that their oldest son - scion of the family Black - is not only a queer, but is debasing himself even further by screwing an animal.’

‘You little fucking bastard!’

‘Sirius! No!’

Their wands were drawn before Remus could get the words out and even as his cry was still bouncing off the stone walls, Sirius' first curse was soaring across the hall. It rebounded off the wall behind Regulus’ head and Remus ducked fast as it shot back towards him. He drew his own wand hastily as Regulus sent a red jet of light at his brother, Sirius spitting an obscenity at him as he dodged it and threw his own hex back at the other boy. Remus raised his wand to try and subdue them, but a Body Bind hex Regulus had thrown at Sirius went astray and hit him in the chest, sending him crashing to the floor.

He heard Sirius’ shout of outrage and a kaleidoscope of colours lit up the darkness before a cry of pain rang out. Everything was quiet for a moment, a duet of hastened, irregular breathing the only sound, then there were low, muttered words dripping with contempt, and fast footfalls that faded quickly into nothing.

An incantation was mumbled and Remus’ body unclenched; the spell released. Remus sat up, seeing Sirius slumped on the ground against the wall, knees drawn to his chest, and his chest tightened.

‘Sirius?' he gasped urgently. 'Are you hurt?’

He scrambled across the cold floor, kneeling in front of the brunette. ‘Pads?’

‘I’m fine,' Sirius mumbled, lifting his head.

Remus was horrified to see blood smeared across the brunette's cheek. ‘Shit! What did he do?’

‘He didn’t do anything,' Sirius said dully. 'It was just a bit of stone or something that hit me.’

‘From a bloody curse he used,' Remus said furiously, so angry he almost missed Sirius' next whispered words.

‘I got him.’

Remus had pulled out his wand to try and heal the cut across Sirius’ cheekbone, but paused at the almost inaudible confession.

‘What?’

‘I got him,' Sirius said quietly, pale face tinged with a little green as he thought of what he'd done. 'He was bleeding, Moony. Bad.’

Remus sank down, sitting on his legs in front of Sirius. ‘How badly?' he asked. 'Where?’

‘His chest…Cutting hex…’ Sirius said, breath catching as nausea hit him hard and fast. He swallowed against the bile that rose in his throat as Remus spoke soothingly.

‘He‘ll go to the infirmary, Sirius. He‘ll be fine. He was right about one thing - he's not stupid. I‘ll clean you up...’

He lifted his wand again but Sirius gripped his wrist, stopping him casting the healing spell and staring up at him with dark, shadowed eyes.

‘Can…can you check on him for me?' he asked hoarsely. 'Please, Remus? Take the cloak - you won’t have to see him or talk to him. Just…make sure he didn’t collapse somewhere on the way back to his common room? Someone there will heal him; I just need to know he isn't...bleeding to death somewhere.’

Remus frowned. Sirius’ lip was trembling, his voice cracking with suppressed emotion. The last thing Remus wanted to do was leave him, but when the brunette repeated his plea, he nodded.

‘Alright,' he muttered. 'Can you get back to our dorm?’

‘It’s just a little cut,' Sirius said, brushing off his concern. 'I’m fine.’

Sirius saw Remus’ reluctance and slid his hand from the werewolf’s bony wrist to his hand and squeezed it tight. 'He's still my brother, Moony.’

Remus nodded and touched his hand to Sirius’ face. He leaned forward to press his lips to the brunette’s forehead before he pushed himself to his feet.

‘I’ll make sure he got back to his common room alright,' he acquiesced. 'See you up in our room. I won’t be long.’

He stared down at Sirius for another moment then snatched up the Invisibility cloak and took off down the hall fast.

Sirius let out a long, shaky breath and buried his face in his hands. He and Regulus had fought before but their battles had always been verbal. When the younger Black had insulted Remus though, Sirius had reacted before thinking, before he remembered that this was his brother and the next thing he knew, he was holding a wand on him.

And when Remus had been hit with a hex, fury like Sirius had never experienced before had burnt through him, consuming every last fond memory he had of his sibling. He’d cast his curses true, aiming them not as warnings or to frighten, but to hit, to hurt, and they had. His last hex had hit Regulus in the chest - where his heart would be if he had one.

A little moan escaped Sirius and he raised his head, letting it fall back hard against the stone wall. The look of repugnance in his brother’s eyes before he left had sent chills down Sirius’ spine and his parting words left no doubt of his feelings towards his older sibling.

"You are no brother of mine. You are no Black."

‘Well, maybe I don’t want to be a Black anymore.’

Sirius said the words aloud, not realising what he'd done until he heard them echoed back to him. He stood up slowly and headed to the nearest bathroom, sucking in a breath when he saw the long cut across his cheek.

Holding his wand to his cheek, he mumbled an incantation and watched as the torn flesh knitted itself back together. He winced at the slight burn then bent over the basin, washing the blood off his face with ice cold water. He raised his head and watched the water run in little rivulets down his face - over the grey eyes and straight nose he’d inherited from his father; the sharp cheekbones and pink lips that were his mothers'. At the thought of his parents, he grimaced. Regulus would tell them everything, of this he had no doubt, and Sirius was surprised that the knowledge didn’t terrify him as he thought it would.

I may look like them, but I’m nothing like them. Thanks to Remus.

Remus had such a good heart that it was almost impossible not to become a better person just by being with him. The other boy had somehow, without Sirius even realising it, made him believe that he could escape the shadow of his family, that he could be his own person, that he was strong enough to withstand anything they could throw at him.

He could do this...as long as he had Remus.

TBC...