TRYING TO REMEMBER

Harry came running upstairs. Sirius had Remus unconscious body in his arms covered in a sheet.

“What happened?”

“His chest is ripped open again.”

“Again, but…” and then it hit Harry like a ton of bricks phoenixes can cure wounds but not curses.

“What Harry, why is it happening? I thought that ruddy bird cured him.”

“Only his wounds, not the curse>”

Sirius almost dropped Remus then and there, recomposed himself and flooed to St. Mungo’s. Sirius ran to Dai Llewyllyn Ward.

“Fix him. Make it all go away.”

“It’s about time you got here. I thought I made it clear when you last left here he was supposed to be here right after he transformed or else he would have to transform here.”

With that the Healers started working on Remus. What surprised then was how healthy the skin was mot the massive scar tissue that Remus ripped through. The scar tissue gets thinner and thinner each month until there is no skin holding it together and he’s bleeds out, they expected that to be with in the year. However they think he now has an additional six months.

“You can see him now.”

Sirius sat next to him and took his hand and kissed his forehead.

“Hey babe.”

“Hey.”

“Did they explain?”

“I knew.”

“You knew and didn’t bother to tell me?”

“When Sirius? When we were making love on the beach, or fucking each other silly at the beach house. When we were sitting watching the sunrise just holding each other talking about the future, our future. Oh by the way all those hopes and dreams fuck them I’m still dying. No Sirius I couldn’t ruin our holiday. We’d never taken one like that before. It just would have been different if you knew. You’d be coddling me all the time. I need this to be an equal partnership. Tell you last night? Would we have transformed together? When was the last full moon?

“January 2nd.”

“And this one?

“January 31st.”

“Do you know the next one is March 2nd?”

“I know it’s the same days apart, but psychologically to me I have back to back months with double transformations. You just wouldn’t understand.”

“I’m sorry babe. I just thought it was over.”

“It’s just the beginning. Severus left some journals behind maybe there is a clue in one of them about the counter curse. The aurors are still going through the house. We’ll get to pick over stuff when they’re done. I haven’t lost hope, neither should you. I’ll be on my last breath and I still wouldn’t give up. Please don’t give up on me.”

Remus moved over on the bed.

“Lie down with me and hold me.”

Sirius slipped his shoes off and climbed into bed and Remus nestled against him and into his arms whispering ‘I love you’ before he drifted to sleep.

The next month was a flurry of activity as some of the journals were released. Remus and Hermione had locked themselves away with research. Before they knew it March 2nd had arrived. When Remus transformed back Sirius gathered him in his arms and took him to St. Mungo’s.

The following day when they were laying in the hospital bed Sirius holding him tight.

“What do you want for your birthday, luv.”

“More than anything?”

“Besides the obvious.”

“A family.”

“Excuse me? If you haven’t noticed neither on of us has the right bits for that.”

“Of course I noticed.”

“Then how because you’ve obviously put a lot of thought into it or else you wouldn’t have brought it up.”

“Well there’s a charm that could change my sex for twenty four hours. We harvest the eggs, freeze them until we can fertilize them with your sperm. Then we hire someone to carry the baby.”

“Well that’s all well and good what ever you said but the eggs will still have the wolf DNA.”

“We’ll extract it.”

“It sounds so futuristic and hard.”

“Muggles do it all the time.”

“And what muggle would be willing…” It dawned on Sirius what he was getting at, “or should I say muggle born. Remus you two are supposed be looking for a counter curse.”

And we are we found several promising incantations. Even tried a few but obviously they didn’t work.”

“How far have you gotten with this experiment?”

“We’ve separated the wolf’s DNA.”

“How?”

“I gave her a sperm sample and we figured out how to extract the wolf’s DNA from there.”

“You jerk off in front of her?”

“No the bathroom.”

“Why do you get to be the girl? I bet I’d be a very pretty and sexy girl.”

“I bet you would too. I have a secret to confess. After the incident with Lily I went to the ministry and had them sterilize me. My sperm is no good.”

“So boy or a girl? And I get special favors.”

“You always get special favors.”

“I mean when you’re a girl.”

“We’ll discuss it when we get home.”

Remus was released two days later and they were in the kitchen.

“You never answered me boy or girl?”

“Actually I wanted both.”

“How did we get to two babies?”

“A perfect little nuclear family.”

Looking down loving at Remus right now he couldn’t deny him anything. He had seventeen transformations left and did not want their to be one day when they weren’t in total bliss.

“Okay, babe.”

“Lily and Albus.”

Except this. “I totally agree on Lily, but I was hoping James. I thought you would want that too.”

“I do Albus James.”

“Why not James Albus? I let you have the girl and name it.”

“You let me? Forget it Sirius forget the whole thing.”

Remus grabbed his cloak by the door and left.

Sirius hated when Remus was moody like this. Sirius thought, ‘would it really be so bad to let him name both babies he’s going through so much right now. But he really and truly wanted James.’ He looked at the pictures that framed the mantle of twelve Grimmauld Place especially the Weasley family. How the hell did they do it when the twins were born she already had Percy who was two, Charlie five and Bill seven. She had Arthur, but did she really? He must have had to work a lot to support the family, at least Bill was off to Hogwarts soon after Ginny arrived. Well if Molly could handle seven maybe he could handle three when Remus was gone. And even if Remus were to go he was sure he would have plenty of help. He’ll tell Remus of his idea when he gets back.

A few hours went by and Remus didn’t show up. Sirius was a wreck he didn’t want to think of the possibilities. He left Grimmauld Place and apparated to the cottage. And could tell no one had been there. The wards hadn’t been interrupted. Next he went to the Shack an old favorite place to think, but he wasn’t there either. Lastly he went to Godric’s Hollow and there stood a single shadow in the graveyard. Sirius walked up to him staring at James’ and Lily’s gravesites.

“I’m sorry. You’re right it should be James.” Sirius stood behind him and put his arms around Remus waist and held him tight Remus leaned back on his shoulder. “He meant so much to both of us.”

“I understand why you want Albus he gave so much to you, both of really I should have been expelled after the prank, but he kept me. He was understanding and helped the Potters keep me after I ran a way from home. He told the kids how to help me escape when they locked me up at Hogwarts. He let me stay with Harry after the deal with Voldemort after the third task. And I know now that keeping me locked in the house was probably for the best.”

“So now you want Albus and I want James.”

“No I still want James and you still want Albus I presume. So the only solution as I see it is three babies. It couldn’t be much harder than two.”

“Are you serious?”

“Have been all my life. I want us to be happy we’ve gone through so much not to be. So go make the appointment.”

“I already have?”

“When?”

“My birthday.”

“Happy Birthday to me.”

The night before Remus' birthday, he performed the gender switching charm. Remus walked out of the bathroom slowly. Sirius couldn’t stop staring, he was beautiful as a girl. His breasts round and slightly on the larger medium size but not too large, his waist
Small and flat and he had a small amount of light brown hair where his cock used to hang. His face slimmed and his nose shrank and his hair was down past his shoulders. His legs were long and shapely and had the cutest feet.

“Is it that bad? If you don’t want to do anything tonight.”

“Believe me I do. You’re beautiful.”

“But look I still have all these scars.”

“They’re beautiful.” Sirius went to Remus and picked him up. “You’re lighter,” then carried him to the bed.

Sirius kissed Remus slightly on the lips. His lips were softer more supple he moved his tongue into his lovers mouth it was much smaller but tastes were of nothing but Remus. He moved his tongue down the jaw line the skin was so much smoother.

“Can I touch your breasts?

“Please.”

As Sirius straddled Remus and started kneading his breast, he could feel his cock getting hard on thing was for sure he was way overdressed. He slipped his shirt over his head and threw it across the room, caught off guard Remus flipped him.

“Let me have some fun too.”

Remus undid the button of Sirius pants and with his teeth unzipped his pants. He then pulled down his pants. He straddled him and kissed him so passionately. He made his way spreading little kisses down his chest, lathering, nibbling and sucking his left nipple then the right one. He ran his tongue down to his bellybutton and started sucking on that, that he ran that talented tongue across the vein on the underside of his cock a few times. He started to suck his balls and then there was this spot between his balls and his ass that if done properly would give him pure ecstasy and Remus was the only one that Sirius knew that could do it right. While licking and sucking, Remus stuck a finger up his own wet pussy to get it lubricated. After lubricating it thoroughly which didn’t take long he stuck it in Sirius ass and was massaging his prostrate both from the inside with his finger and the outside with his tongue. He could feel he was about to come when Remus put his mouth on his cock took and sucked. Sirius arched his back, and scrunched his toes to the most mind blowing orgasm he ever had.

Sirius was still panting “Gods Remus where did you learn to do that?”

Remus winked at him “Research.”

He leaned over and kissed him the whispered in his ear. “Tie me up, Take full advantage of this body while you have it.”

Sirius didn’t need telling twice. He conjured silk scarves and tied Remus wrists and ankles to each corner of the bed. He then took one last one and blindfolded him.

“Why the blindfold?”

“I want you to have the heightened sensations I did that night you brought me back. Remember that night?”

“Yeah and all the nights after and before it.”

Sirius kissed his lips softly and moved his hand down to his right breast slowly grazing his thumb across the nipple, Remus let out a small groan.

“Feel good babe?”

He then moved his hand down gently moving across Remus waist, which made his stomach retract, down to the soft silky hair between his thighs. Kneading his crotch he moved a finger inside of Remus’ pussy it was so wet lubricated his finger and started searching with his fingers where his clit was each gesture was brining a small moan from Remus but not the reaction he was waiting for. It’s been so long since he was with a girl but the reaction was still going to be the same as it was all those years ago. Sirius went inside Remus again and continued his search.

“Sirius just a little bit higher.”

Sirius found the little nub he was looking for and Remus arched his back and groaned loudly. That was the reaction Sirius was waiting for. He was making little circles on it and could hear Remus breath get heavier and heavier and then came the scream.

“God, Sirius. Please fuck me.”

“Not yet, babe.”

Sirius wanted to fuck him so bad he was so fucking hard it wasn’t funny. But he wanted Remus to come again. Sirius put his head between Remus legs and started licking the area he just left Remus was wriggling back and forth because the sensitivity of the area was astounding. Not only was Sirius lather and sucking his clit he was massaging his insides too. Remus came again and because Sirius didn’t stop he came again.

Remus breathing was really heavy now, “Fuck me please.”

Sirius was more than obliging this time, he stuck his weeping cock inside of Remus he was so fucking tight and it felt so good and wet he hoped that they got to do this again.

“Sirius it hurts.”

“Let me take it slow.”

Sirius moved slowly as he passed through Remus’ hymen, which gave Remus some relief.

“Better babe? That’s twice I took your virginity.”

Sirius started moving back and forth.

“Faster.”

Sirius started thrusting faster and faster getting as deep as he could, Remus started spasming again which meant he was about to orgasm and he did the contractions so intense that Sirius came shortly after. Sirius slowly took down the blindfold and kissed Remus nose.

“You are so incredible.”

“So are you.”

Sirius waved his wand and all the binds were gone.

“What time do we have to meet Hermione, tomorrow?”

“Two o’clock.”

“Good leaves plenty of time to make love to you at least two maybe three more times.”

“Get over here.”