Outside the Potions Classroom

Outside the Potions Classroom



Chapter Nineteen


Severus expected the mood to improve by the time they Apparated to the Burrow, and he was right. Immediately upon being welcomed into the clamorous, disorganized Weasley home, Severus felt a sense of warmth wash over him. He was often amazed by the fact that no matter how many levels Arthur added, it managed to stand undefeated by gravity. The house now stood seven stories tall, the top levels home to the latest additions to the family: George, his wife Mary and their twins, Flora and Fauna.

They were greeted warmly by Molly, who ushered them in and slammed the door shut behind them. With a wave of her wand, she took their traveling cloaks and gave them all steaming hot mugs of tea. “Goodness me, I didn’t expect you to be here, Severus.”

He didn’t smile. “Is there a problem?”

Hermione hugged the older witch with a small laugh. “I hope you don’t mind that I dragged the sour Potions master away from his lair to join us,” she offered.

Before he could correct her, Molly chuckled happily and reached her arms around him. It wasn’t a completely unwelcome gesture – too personal for his tastes but he didn’t flinch too much in her arms. “And look at you Hadrian! Such a handsome young man. Looking so much like your father every time I see you!”

Hadrian smiled softly at this, and then hugged the round woman. “Happy Christmas, Mrs. Weasley.”

Molly’s face scrunched up happily as she embraced the lad. “I believe both Chris and Annabelle are waiting for you upstairs in the twin’s old bedroom. They’re trying to get a game of Quidditch going and I think they will be needing a keeper,” she pointed out. “My, those are some very fine looking robes.”

Hadrian had already taken off. “Thanks, Mrs. Weasley. I’ll see ya later Mum, Dad!” he called as he disappeared, almost spilling his tea as he went.

“That boy hasn’t changed a bit,” Molly smiled. “Well come in, come in. Do make yourselves comfortable.” She ducked her head into the other room and called out: “Hermione and Severus are here!”

Hermione smiled weakly at Severus before they followed Molly into the lounge. The Weasleys were never lacking in visitors, having most of their children, children’s children and all their acquaintances visiting, but Severus was taken back by the Christmas visitors. All the Weasleys were there, along with their respected spouses, most of the old Order members, along with a few Ministry officials he couldn’t be bothered to recall their names. Of course, Severus was able to survey the room well – all speech seemed to fade as he entered the room.

Luckily the silence didn’t last too long. Hermione shouted out a ‘Happy Christmas, everyone!’ and began to make her rounds as Remus pulled Severus into conversation with himself, Nymphadora and Arthur.

“No one expected you to be here,” Tonks admitted.

“Not that you aren’t welcome,” Arthur added. “You will always be welcome in my home, Snape. I reckon you’ve saved our arses more than once, and it’s a pleasure to see you over the holidays.”

“Quite,” Snape added, taking a long sip of his tea. It was strong, the way he preferred it.

“So how are you and Hadrian getting on then?” Remus asked.

Severus took a sharp breath. “Considering I never knew I had a son, very well. I gather everyone here was privy to this information before I was?” Although he had not been here long, he already felt very tired and very annoyed. His temples were starting to throb and his disposition was falling…fast.

Arthur shook his head. “Not everyone, but the resemblance has been there since the beginning.”

Severus willed his blood to cool, willed it to stop simmering through his veins. How could he have forgotten?

Everyone in the room had known. Everyone here he had considered allies, dare he say even call them familiars – and they had all known this secret about him. They had known for eleven years that Hermione had been hiding his son…and they did nothing.

He felt like the biggest fool. Remus knew – a man he had spoken to every week for the past 15 years, had known about his illegitimate son – and had not said a bloody word.

Remus placed a hand on his shoulder and excused them both. He quietly ushered Severus into the next room – a guest bedroom. “It wasn’t really our place to tell you, Severus.”

“How long have we known each other, Remus?” he managed to ask, albeit very quietly.

“Severus…I know you must feel betrayed right now, but no one dared laugh at you or behind your back. Hermione was so…pathetic and determined to raise Hadrian on her own, only the select few that knew honored her decision not to include you. It didn’t matter if we disagreed; it wasn’t our decision to make. I think we both know it wasn’t easy. Hermione is a very special woman, Sev, and everything she has, she has worked very hard for. I think she has done well for herself, and for Hadrian. Who could find fault in that? She didn’t give you a chance, I agree. You had the right to be a father.

“I had known about your affair with Hermione from the start. The full moon told me your secret. When I came for my Wolfsbane Potion, I could smell her on you. But I was hardly in any position to call you out for it, who would believe me, a werewolf? But then the next month, I smelt her again. I smelt her all over your office and in your rooms. But this time, I wasn’t suspicious or ready to hand you over to Albus, I was…happy for you. You were happy with her, I could tell. For as long as I have ever known you, you have been a miserable sodding git with a chip on his shoulder. You were different, and I knew it had to be her. It somewhat made sense; she was, correction, is the brightest witch of her day. She has been years wiser than most, and I know for a fact she has always respected you. Maybe even harbored a secret crush. I didn’t know how it had started, but as long as it went on, I saw a change in you that I would have liked to see in myself.

“Of course, graduation came. I had hoped something would progress between the two of you, but I knew it would be difficult. She was your student after all, and the affair didn’t bode well for either of you. That summer I knew it was over; you were back to your usual self. I had so much hope for you both, it was truly unfortunate the relationship didn’t progress.

“It should have. There is no point in saying that now, but she loved you. When I found out she was pregnant through Harry, I went to see her. I wanted to reason with her, show her the logic in her choice. She’ll always be stubborn, but so are you. I pity Hadrian. Hopefully he won’t inherit the trait. She said she couldn’t trust you, and that you didn’t love her. She asked me how she could entrust the man who abandoned her heart, with the heart of her child. I told her that I didn’t know, but she was a coward for not allowing you the chance. I thought it would inspire the Gryffindor in her.

“It didn’t. I pleaded your case, and we both lost. Hadrian’s a great kid, and from what Harry tells me, adores you. Right now I expect Hermione to be feeling the humility of her actions, and coming here tonight, with you, shows that she knew she was wrong, we were right and now she is dealing with the consequences. This reflects on her, not you. Those that knew the truth point no fingers in your direction. I think most of us are just pleased that you get the chance to be happy, especially after everything you have done for us. I only wish you would have been given this chance sooner.”

Remus was telling the truth, Severus knew this. It still didn’t amend the fact that he felt like a fool who not only had missed his son’s childhood, but also been a mockery to all he knew.

“You say it wasn’t your place to tell me, then why even bother plead my case to her deaf ears?” Severus set his cold tea down, wished it were something stronger. He wished he had never set foot in this house. He wished he were warm and safe and alone at home, where he could be spared the harsh judgments of his peers. How could he have not realized these people would know the truth? How could he have been so ignorant?

“Because it was the right thing to do.”

“The right thing to do would have been to let me plead my own case,” Severus retorted.

Remus raised his hands. “I’m sorry, Sev, but I am your friend. How would you have taken this news coming from me? You would have been outraged. What would you have done? You should be thankful everything worked out so well, and that you are apart of Hadrian’s life here and now,” Remus sighed. “The past only serves to remind us of what we have lost. Your future is ahead of you, and finally, it’s bright. Think of that.”

Remus left him then, closing the bedroom door behind him. He was thankful for the moment alone – the throbbing of his temples was beginning to blind him with pain.

No matter how hard he forced himself to look forward, just as Remus put it, he was forced to confront the past. It seemed as if this happiness he was supposed to find was always just outside his reach. Would he forever be reminded of Hermione’s fateful decision that separated him from his son?

He wanted to leave, and he wanted to leave now. It was just too much to bear. He resolved himself to find his son and leave this place before he just couldn’t take it and ended up being unforgivably himself and insulting some unsuspecting guest…or host.

As he adjourned to the next room, everyone stood around the fireplace making toasts.

“-Thank Merlin for small favors and butterbeer!” Kingsley Shacklebolt laughed, raising his pint in toast. “Cheers!”

“I think there is one more person we are forgetting to toast,” Hermione interrupted. This stopped Severus in his tracks. He caught her eye from across the room. As usual, she was flanked by the grown boy wonder and his sidekick, the older, albeit not wiser, Ronald Weasley.

“I’d like to propose a toast to Severus Snape,” Hermione said raising her glass. “The best father my son could have ever dreamed of is the same man who didn’t allow a silly, insecure woman like me to ruin it all.”

“And always showing us how to persevere,” Remus added.

“And reminding us not to act like dunderheads,” Ronald Weasley chimed in.

“Oi, shut it, Ron,” Harry Potter poked his friend in the ribs. “A toast to Severus Snape then.”

Severus didn’t know what to say as they all raised their glasses in his honor and drank deeply. He wasn’t sure if he liked the extra attention…at first. He preferred to remain on the sidelines so he could always have the best view of his surroundings. They were permitted to toast him…he just wouldn’t give them the satisfaction of smiling or showing any outward signs of pleasure in seeing them do so. He was still miffed about everyone knowing something so significant about him without actually informing him.

After the toasts, the room broke down into groups again. Hermione caught his eye and began to work her way back over to him.

“Are you brooding?” she asked.

“A little, yes,” he admitted. “Why are we here, Hermione?”

Her eyes seemed to sparkle whenever he said her name. “Because I had to show them.”

“What did you have to show them?” His eyes narrowed. He had a feeling he knew what it was and it wasn’t good.

“That they were right about you,” she sighed. “I was so stubborn and foolish. I had no right to keep Hadrian from you. I see how he adores you already and I know….” She sucked in a deep breath before she finished her thought. “I know I was wrong. I don’t like being wrong. I will never get used to it. But I was wrong about you, Severus. I let all my resentment keep our son from you and…”

He could hear the pain in her voice and he pulled her closer to him by gently taking her elbow. His eyes bore down into hers and with the slightest hint of mirth in his voice, he told her: “There are support groups…for witches who won’t admit they have a problem with being wrong from time to time. You’ve already taken the first step and admitted you have a problem. I’m sure after a few meetings, you can overcome this particularly unattractive behavior.”

She sniffed and glared up at him strangely. “Are you making fun of me, Severus Snape?”

“I do believe I am,” he said dryly. “It took an effort on my part…”

“You’ve been very good about this,” Hermione sighed, again. “You have been very good about everything. I expected you to have already hatched some sort of ostentatious plan for revenge on me.”

He smirked in spite of it all. “The thought had crossed my mind.” He shrugged. “I think as old as I am, I have learned to accept the things I can’t change and forget the things I can.”

“That’s not the way the saying goes.”

“That’s the way it goes at my age.”

“You’re not old,” she remarked. “You’ve got many good years ahead of you before you even reach the hill.”

“So I’m not quite over it yet?” He asked demurely.

She shook her head. “No, you are very well still in your prime. But I don’t think you need me to tell you that.” A faint blush was starting in her cheeks, and growing rapidly by the second.

“Oi! Look who’s under the mistletoe!” shouted George (or was it Fred?) Weasley.

Severus and Hermione locked eyes and looked up together. Shite.

“You’ll be wishing you kissed after Santa’s reindeer comes and gives you a hoof in the mouth instead,” Molly warned.

Severus looked down at Hermione again. Merlin, did the fates have it in for him tonight? Almost everyone in the room was watching, including Potter and Weasley…a pang of dread filled him. It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.

He watched as a row of children climbed down the stairs, Hadrian included. The boy’s eyes opened wide as he realized what was going on.

Cursing fate and whoever put the mistletoe up, Severus reached down and gently pressed his lips to Hermione’s.



Tbc…