You Know What They Say about Necessity...

\"The Reason\" is by Hoobastank.

Disclaimer: It\'s all JKR\'s. Please don\'t think I want it!



Chapter Twenty: the Reason



Hermione knocked softly on Severus’ door, entering the room and closing the door after hearing his answering: “Come in.” He was not lying down in bed, but sitting at his desk, looking over what appeared to be notes written in a leather-bound journal. When he saw her, he smiled, closing the journal and holding out his arms to her.

She launched herself at him like a rocket, remembering at the last moment to be careful of his legs, but Severus didn’t seem to care. He pulled her into his lap, ignoring her protests that their combined weight would damage his wheelchair. “It’s very sturdy,” he told her. “I specifically requested one built to accommodate two people,” he added, smirking, and was rewarded by an answering smile from her just before she took his face in her hands and kissed him.

A few minutes later, he pulled her back slightly, face flushed and eyes glazed. “Hermione, if you persist in this behavior, I am going to be in danger of brain damage due to oxygen loss.”

“Sorry,” she answered, panting a bit herself.

“Don’t apologize for your enthusiasm,” Severus murmured. “Just let me breathe once in a while.”

She smiled again, snuggling further into his lap in the chair until Severus felt his body respond in the expected manner. He tried to shift her so she wouldn’t feel his erection, but she started laughing.

“My, that’s an awfully big wand you have, Severus,” she teased, and was delighted when he actually blushed. She didn’t give him much time to be embarrassed about it, though, because she started kissing him again.

Were it not for the fact that his mouth was full of Hermione’s tongue, Severus would have laughed. He might have known she’d apply the same enthusiasm she had for learning to other things. She certainly wasn’t shy, and she was about as subtle as… well… well, she was a Gryffindor, he reminded himself. Pureblood and muggleborn. Slytherin and Gryffindor. Forty and twenty. How in Merlin and Morgana’s name had this happened, anyway?!

His introspection came to a halt as she moved back from their kiss, looking nervous. “Severus, there’s something I should tell you,” she said. “About, um, what happened on the porch. With Dan.”

What? Oh, yes. The therapist. Severus looked at her. “If you are about to tell me that he asked you for a date, I surmised that already,” he said wryly.

Her eyes widened. “You did? How?”

He chuckled. “Please, Hermione. That young man has been looking at you for several weeks now, or hadn’t you noticed?”

“No, actually, I hadn’t,” she retorted. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“It wasn’t my place to tell you, before,” he said.

“But it is now?” she asked quietly.

He looked down at his hands, which were clasping her waist. Her question didn’t unnerve him so much as set him pondering. Was it his place? What exactly was going on between them? What did he want: and, equally important, what did Hermione want?

He knew it wasn’t just sexual. He knew he wanted more from her. Severus just wasn’t sure exactly what that “more” was. Everything seemed to be happening so fast. One week they’d been friends, and somehow that line had blurred, and now she was a soft bundle sitting in his lap, with lips like sugar and hair that smelled like water lilies.

“Severus?”

Her eyes were wide and frightened. Hermione watched his hesitation, and with every passing second, she felt her heart beat more and more painfully. Had he changed his mind? When confronted with the reality of the two of them, did he want to run away? She tensed in his lap, ready to spring, until he realized she was having a fit of the vapors and sighed.

“Hermione. Calm down.”

She remained wary, hands gripping his arms, and Severus sighed again, wrapping his arms more tightly around her. “I don’t want you to go anywhere,” he whispered reassuringly. “I am not going anywhere. Please stop digging your nails into my arms.”

She unclenched her hands. “Sorry,” she said softly, sheepishly.

He smiled at her. “You are quite the little lioness.” He pressed a kiss to her temple. “Listen to me. I don’t know that’s going to happen with us, any more than you do. But I want to find out how things will progress. I am not having second thoughts, I am not getting cold feet, and I am not giving you up: to a therapist or anyone else.” He tipped her head and gazed into her eyes. “Is that what you wanted to hear?” he asked, his voice a dark purr that sent shivers down her spine.

“Yes,” she breathed, fingers sliding up to tangle in his hair.

“Good.” And he kissed her.
******************************************

“Up for a game of wizard’s chess, Harry?”

Harry groaned at his other best friend. “Ron, why do you hate me? Or are you just a closet sadist?”

Ron grinned at him. “Ah, you’ve improved over the past ten years, Harry! One day you’ll beat me. If you keep playing, that is.”

Harry rolled his eyes. “I could play for five hours every day and still not beat you. Why don’t you ask Snape if he wants a rematch? I’m sure your last game didn’t sit well with him.”

Ginny smirked. Luna, who had been reading the latest issue of Witches Weekly sideways, lowered it and frowned at Ron. “What happened the last time you played against Professor Snape?”

Harry and Ginny laughed. “You didn’t tell her?” Ginny asked. “I can’t believe it! I thought you’d take out a full page ad in the Prophet after that game!”

Ron reddened, his face nearly matching his hair. “I didn’t want to brag about it, okay? I’m trying to stay humble.”

Ginny doubled over in laughter. Harry just smiled as he told Luna the story.

Ron had come by for dinner again, and one thing leading to another, he and Snape decided to play the game Snape had asked for a week before. Harry, Ginny, and Hermione decided to play Exploding Snap in the dining room while they played chess. Three games of Exploding Snap later, Severus wheeled past them, an unreadable expression on his face, and said goodnight. His voice was odd, not his usual deep dramatic tone. A few minutes later, Ron came into the dining room and plunked down into a chair with a sigh.

“Deal me in,” he said, his voice strained and confused.

Ginny dealt, while all three of them stared. Finally, Harry couldn’t take it anymore. “Well?”

“Well, we played,” Ron replied.

When it was obvious nothing else would be forthcoming, Hermione said: “And?”

Ron sighed again.

Harry touched his shoulder. “I’m sorry, mate. But you know: he is older than us. And as much as I hate to admit it, pretty damn clever. You shouldn’t feel so bad that you—”

“Won,” Ron said quietly. “I won, Harry. I beat Snape.”

All three of them stared at Ron in a mixture of awe and disbelief.

“You’re kidding,” Ginny whispered.

“Nope.” Ron shook his head. “Caught him with a reverse fool’s mate.”

Hermione’s eyes were wide. “Ron, that was…”

“Bloody brilliant!” Harry exclaimed.

“Yeah, it was a gamble that paid off,” Ron muttered.

“I don’t understand this, Ron,” Ginny said. “You beat him. You beat Snape. The man who made our lives hell at Hogwarts. You showed him you’re good. Damn good. So why don’t you look happy?”

Ron didn’t answer her for a few minutes. When he did speak, his voice was quiet.

“It’s an odd thing. When I won, I looked at Snape’s face. He was shocked, no doubt about it. I don’t know if it was because he’d thought he was that good, or he didn’t think I would be. Whatever it was, he’d gotten kicked in the teeth. I expected him sneer, to tell me that it was just luck on my part. But he didn’t. He shook my hand. Shook my hand and said it was the best game he’d played in years.”

Harry could not have been more astounded. “Snape shook your hand and said good game? Does he need medicine? Has he taken too much medicine?” Harry whispered.

“All I know is, when he did that and left to go bed, I sat there for a minute,” Ron continued. “I thought I’d be ecstatic, you know? I thought I’d want to brag and gloat. But for some reason, I don’t. Maybe it’s because for the first time ever, Snape showed me respect. Genuine respect.”

Hermione smiled at Ron. “I think that’s great, Ron. Very mature of you.” She moved around and gave him a big hug.

“Yeah, well, just don’t go telling people that, okay?” he laughed. “I’ve got a reputation to uphold, you know!”

Luna started giggling. “Oh, Ron. You’re funnier than a three-toed Ixnion.”

“Thanks… I think,” Ron answered, giving her a peck on the cheek.

“So, do you want another game with him? I can go tell him,” Harry offered.

“Maybe later,” Ron said. “Right now I want you to clear out of here so we can discuss your party. Hey, is Mione still in his room?”

“She must be,” Harry said. “I’ll go get her so you four can talk.” He hurried out of the room.

“Hermione spends a lot of time with Snape,” Ginny mused.

“That’s because she has a crush on him,” Luna said absently, opening her magazine back up, turning it sideways, and resuming her reading.

“What?!” Ron shrieked. “Luna, sweet, you know I love you, but honestly… you’ve got to stop spouting off nonsense!”

“It’s not nonsense,” she answered without looking up. “But it’s okay if you don’t believe me.”

“It’s not that I don’t believe you,” Ron said.

“Then what?” Luna asked.

“It’s just that… it’s impossible!”

“If you say so, dearest,” Luna replied serenely.

Ron wiped his brow. “I’m glad Harry didn’t hear that,” he muttered.

Ginny nodded. “Perhaps we should keep this between us.”

“Sounds wonderful,” Luna said vaguely, flipping a page.
******************************************

Harry knocked on Snape’s door a little harder than he’d meant to. “Hermione, Ron and Luna are here! They want to talk with you about my party!” he called.

“I’ll be right there!” Hermione answered quickly.

Harry scowled at the door. He wouldn’t open it. That would be wrong. But it was strange, all this time she was spending with Snape. Potions or not. Harry missed his friend. And after Ron and Luna left, he was going to let Hermione know that. He went back down the hall, turning over in his mind what he would say.

Hermione pulled herself out of Severus’ lap. “I have to go,” she said.

“I know,” he told her quietly.

“It’s Harry’s birthday party, and every year we plan it together, all of us,” she said. “He’s my best friend…”

“Hermione.”

Severus softly speaking her name halted her rambling. She turned to see that he was smiling.

“I understand that Potter is your best friend,” he said. “While I might question your judgment somewhat—” he held up a hand as he saw fire spring to life in her eyes— “it is not my intention to take you away from your friends, or to tell you who those friends should be.”

The glimmer of anger disappeared, and Hermione smiled in pure delight at him. She bent to give him one last kiss. “Thank you, Severus,” she whispered as she stood up.

He inclined his head. “Now run along before Potter comes back to see what’s keeping you.”

She nodded. “I’ll be back sometime tonight,” she told him, and left.

Severus sighed. They could not keep things a secret forever. He knew that. Although he didn’t much care what her friends thought of him, Severus was concerned about what they would think about Hermione. There would be anger and accusations; he had no doubt of that. Would Potter and the Weasleys accept him? Or would they shun Hermione? Severus hoped that they could all reach an accord. He didn’t want to lose her, but he didn’t want to cause trouble.

That’s going to be inevitable, he snorted. No, the best thing he could think of to do was try and (he winced) get along with Potter and company. He’d never made an effort before: he hadn’t needed to, nor had he truly wanted to. It was easier to write a blank check made out to anger and hate than to try and move beyond them. He and Potter were both stubborn about that. Though certain… events from the recent past had helped them be more civil, that was a long way from getting along. And now Severus had a reason to attempt it. A very important reason… that had bushy hair and eyes like an angel.