Of Death and Fire

valentine


CHAPTER 19: Razorblade Valentines
 
Morgaine woke up with a splitting headache. Resisting the urge to start banging her head against the nearest wall, and thus covering the pain with a greater one, she opened her eyes and looked around. Snape was sitting at the edge of the bed, his back turned to her. He was holding his head on his hands, gently massaging his temples. She shut her eyes again, as the memories of their past experience came flooding in.
Despair took hold of every fiber of her being. What had been his description of the potion? Very useful, much unstable and highly addictive. And very, very dangerous, she could now add. Although the sexual aspect of the experience had been beyond words, the consequences of the knowledge they now shared were frightful. She had fought years to hold back her feelings and now, in a few mom, al, all the protective walls had come crumbling down. Love was the one thing she was not ready to handle. And, in her best guess, neither was Snape.
And what were her options now? Indulge in it, declare her love openly like a foolish teenager? Every cell of her body screamed in terror by the mere thought of it. Let it linger between them, let the seed grow to full strength, until its vines would suffocate them both? Or choose the old, familiar way of denial? She opened her eyes again, seeking some sign to help her with her decision. She attempted to move to her side, but the pain increased and a soft cry left her lips. Snape raised his head and turned to look at her.
"Headache?" he asked, looking not so well himself.
"Not a headache. Just a dozen of bludgers dancing around in my head", she replied, her face distorted from pain. She closed her eyes again, as even the dim candlelight added to her discomfort. She heard him getting up, sounds of moving vials and bottles, and coming back to bed.
"Drink this", he told her, handing her a small vial of clear liquid. "Headache is a common side effect, and this would clear it away". Without any objections, Morgaine emptied the potion in her throat. To her relief, he was right. The pain vanished, leaving her a bit numb. But with her headache gone, the pain in her heart surfaced more demanding.
Snape leaned over her, moving his hand to remove a lock of red hair from her face.
"So, how did you think of your 'journey'?" he asked her, his own face unreadable.
"Interesting", she replied. "But I'd rather not repeat it in the near future", she added, struggling with the urge to scream in despair.
For a moment, their eyes were locked together. The same connection formed again, only this time without the influence of any substance. Their shared knowledge of their common feelings resurfaced, and they stood on the edge of the unknown. Looking into his dark eyes, everything in her screamed to tell him, to take the path that was opened before her. But no words came out, as the darkness in her heart rose and held her back.
He never spoke either, but it was clear the same battle was raging in his head. And the moment came to pass and, silently, they both chose denial. The path to salvation vanished, and a new star appeared in the Sky of Shuttered Dreams.
Morgaine removed his hand and started getting up.
"I'd better go", she said, feeling numb in body and soul. His hand touched her shoulder, and she paused.
"Stay", he said, his voice distant. "The potion's effects have not completely faded out, and I'd rather keep an eye of you for the rest of the night".
She sighed and returned to her place under the covers. He took his place beside her, putting his arm protectively around her. And they soon were deep in a dark, dreamless sleep. In the path they had chosen, no dream would manifest, mourning the death of another love lost.
~*~
The weeks after Yule were dark and gloomy, with frequent rainfall and mist over Hogwarts. Their relationship had changed. They were still enjoying their sexual encounters, but they had become more desperate, driven by a hunger that could not be fulfilled. And they spoke less. Words had become enemies, because they could lead to a path none of them was ready to take.
Meanwhile, life in the school grounds had its own implications as well. Snape found a small delight of attending to the annoying Granger girl and the side effects of a potion gone bad, resulting to a furry face. To Morgaine's surprise, Potter and Weasley's face turned slightly green every time they saw her, and they would hurry away as fast as possible. Filch's cat had been found petrified, and he had become even more vicious.
Morgaine never paid any attention to this last incident, and this lack of attention opened the way to disaster. Filch liked no one in Hogwarts, save his cat. One of his favorite occupations had been stalking the dark corridors, hoping to catch any misbehaving students and have them serve detention. One ally in this little hobby had been no other than Severus Snape himself.
With Mrs. Norris gone, he had relied on Snape's cooperation more. But it seemed as if the Potion' Master had been rather indisposed lately. Filch had been calling on his dungeon, getting no reply from Snape and assuming he was not in. And then shortly after he would hear strange, muffled noises from inside, followed by a dark shape departing from Snape's office and vanish in the shadows. Bitter, bored and suspicious, Filch was determined to get to the core of the matter.
~*~
In mid February they experienced what some called afterwards the "Nightmare in Pink". It had been Lockhart's idea of a dreamy Valentine, while everyone else was trying to survive through the day. For Filch, it was heaven. He spent all day and evening prowling the dark corridors and empty classrooms, scaring couples to their death with his sudden appearance. Late at night, returning from visiting Mrs. Norris in the hospital wing, he stopped on his heals hearing sounds from a dark corner before him. He hid in the shadows, waiting to scare one more couple of teenagers.
Much to his surprise, the kissing couple he had walked in was not students, but teachers. A wicked smile formed on his lips as he saw Morgaine and Severus sneak inside Snape's dungeon, hardly able to keep their hands from each other. Now, how could he use this little piece of treasure?
~*~
A couple of days later, Filch had an epiphany. Lucius Malfoy had again visited his son, and the caretaker couldn't but notice the lust in his eyes as he was watching Morgaine walk by in grace. He crept closer to Malfoy, and spoke in his most casual voice, never directly looking at him.
"Hot stuff, this elf. But these necromancers, they end to have a taste for dark, gloomy places. Take this one, for instance. She seems to favor Snape's office a lot lately. I'd hate to know of what creepy potion they have been working on so late at night. And so many nights in a row. Couple of months, actu". H". He grinned and walked away, never waiting to hear Malfoy's response. Not that he'd hear any...
Malfoy stood motionless, his pale face turned to alabaster. A vein appeared throbbing in his left temple. His lips tightened, soon losing their color to an ashen gray. His hands were clasped around his cane so hard, his knuckles had turned white. Several curses rose up his throat, but he held them back, struggling hard to regain his self-control. With murder in his mind, he walked toward Snape's dungeon.
~*~
On entering his office, he found him in the midst of a pile of papers, grading assignments. Snape raised his head, not expecting any intrusion.
"Malfoy", he said, his face unreadable as always.
The other man approached his desk, his fingers slightly trembling.
"When were you going to tell me?" he demanded, anger twisting his voice. "I would expect that winning our ...little bet would give you enough cause to glow over it, and now I find out that you have taken a deeper interest in this affair. Has the elf caught you in her web?"
Snape left his quill on the desk and sat back on his chair, crossing his hands on his chest. A triumphant smile appeared at the corner of his mouth.
"My dear Lucius", he said in a velvet voice, "I have no idea how you've found out, but the bet is off. The web, as you put it, has proven a very satisfactory place to spend my nights in". Seeing the other man's expression, he decided to turn the knife a bit more. "And not just the nights. Often during the daytime too. And many times in one day, and in various places as well". He stopped, thinking that the pumping veins on Malfoy's forehead would burst. "Oh, Lucius, admit it, you've lost. Get over it."
Malfoy raised his cane, and pointed at Snape.
"I may have lost this round, Severus, but I will not let it go. This is not over yet!" he hissed, and turned to leave. As he turned to face the door, he froze at his heels.
Morgaine stood on the doorstep having heard every word they had said. Malfoy, expecting an outburst, was taken aback by the smile that formed on her lips. Not her usual angelic smile, by a wicked one, revealing she had seen through their game all along. And she had chosen Snape. Furious, he stormed out of the room.
~*~
In the dark corridor outside, he drove his fist on the wall, cursing loudly in the cover of the darkness. He had made a big mistake in underestimating both of them, especially her. He had failed to acknowledge her darkside, attempting to seduce her as he had done with plain witches and squibs. He cursed again, vowing that they would both pay when the Dark Lord returned.
And then, a scheme begun to form in his mind. She was dark, beautiful, a myst of ancient, forbidden knowledge. What a great ally she would have been in their cause! The Dark Lord would rejoice with a consort such as her. If he, Lucius Malfoy, would present him such an offering, his place on Voldemort's side would be undeniable. Yes, he could accomplish that, as long as she would not underestimate her again. A terrible smile lighted his face.
To my Dark Lord, a Goddess.
 
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