Another Kind Of Magic

Severus stormed through his office into his private chambers slamming another door shut behind him. He was furious. With long strides he paced through his sitting room. Back and forth he went, at one point flicking his wand angrily at the teapot, which rattled frightened with boiling water just a second later.

After five more minutes he had calmed down enough to take a cup of tea and sit down. He shook his head. He was disappointed with Harry. And that made him angry with himself. Angry because he had believed that over the last year, Harry and he had come to respect each other. He had thought the hate and resentment had been left behind. And maybe after some more time they might have had the possibility to – to what? Like each other? Severus snorted. He had been far off on that one. Harry really was what Severus had thought all those years: an impertinent brat!

Harry had caught Severus off guard even though he hadn't shown it to the boy – young man, he corrected himself. He had seen and done too many things to still be counted as a boy, a somewhat innocent teen.

Severus had seen in their Occlumency lesions that Harry had not had the live that he had thought. He had not been brought up spoiled rotten by the Dursley's. Severus sighed. He was disappointed because he had actually grown to like Harry, even if he had not shown it to him. Somehow Harry had managed to penetrate Severus' armour. Behind his usual indifferent mask, Severus had been pleased to see that Harry wasn't that bad in potions – of course he could still be better but since the war was over, Harry had delivered quite some good essays, which weren't simply copied from Granger either. And he had stopped making impudent remarks. Severus took another sip of tea. Obviously he had been a fool to believe that those things meant a different acquaintance overall. It rather looked like it has been a long planed trap to make Severus feel secure enough to trust the Gryffindor. Well, that Potter brat had been wrong about that. He had looked right through him after all.

Enough brooding over that! Severus looked at the clock on his mantelpiece. It was time for dinner and even though he wasn't really hungry he would go up there. The Headmistress liked to have all her staff there and it was a good way to keep an eye on Potter.

*

Harry had no idea how much time had passed. He was still kneeling at the very same spot Snape had left him. The ache in his knees and legs weren't bothering him as much as the emotional turmoil inside of him. He needed someone to talk too, but he needed someone that he could trust. And he didn't know anyone else. How could he make Snape believe that he wasn't up to some mischief?

"You must be really determined to play your little tricks on me, Potter."

Harry jumped lightly as he heard Snape's voice. He looked up and shook his head no. Oh well, he was determined, but not because of the reasons Snape thought. He was despaired. Tears stung in his eyes and he blinked to keep them at bay, but to no success. Quickly he lowered his head again. Since the war he had an enormous respect for Snape. Since then he had finally understood that the spy had been playing a murderous game to protect him even though he hated him.

"Sir, I…" Harry's voice broke and he had to clear his throat before he was able to continue. "I… I have a – no. I'm wondering about myself, sir. I have done a little bit of reading, I couldn't find that much and – I just couldn't think of anyone who I trust enough to ask about this." It hadn't even crossed Harry's mind to talk to Ron about it who had enough trouble with him being gay.

"You talk about trust like you would know what it is. And even if you trust me, Potter, tell me one single reason why I should trust you after you broke into my privacy before? Why should I willingly offer you another chance to run to your friends and brag about things you find out?"

Harry looked up in shock and disbelieve. "I never told anyone! Haven't you seen that? I… I was too ashamed of what I did to tell you… and what they did."

Harry stopped for a moment and took a deep breath. If this was the time to confess he could just as well say everything. And he better made it good, it might be the only chance he would get. "I always thought you hated the Marauder's just because you wanted to, because they were different. And I always thought there couldn't be a reason for so much hatred. Well, I was proved wrong."

"And now The Noble Boy Who Lived And Killed Voldemort-"

Harry shook his head and interrupted his teacher. "No, the only reason I would have like to tell anyone – which I didn't! – would have been to tell them that you were mistreated."

"My heart breaks, Potter."

Harry ignored that remark and continued: "As I said I felt to ashamed to apologize. But I thought I had shown it to you in our Occlumency lessons. I never hid my feelings about it. And even though you never said anything, I was sure you had seen how sorry I was for snooping around." Harry took a deep breath. "On the other hand I'm not sorry at all because it showed me that I was wrong and that you weren't the greasy git I believed you to be."

"That must have been a shock to you." Snape said his voice dripping with sarcasm.

Harry nodded seriously. "It was, sir. I had to realise that my dad wasn't that great guy I had thought he was and that you might not be the foul tempered and unfair prick that I saw, or at least you weren't without a reason. And after I realised that I started to look closer."

Snape crossed his arms in front of him. "Now you have me curious, Potter. Pray tell, what do you think you saw?"

Harry thought for a moment. "Well, I guess the first thing I noticed was your devotion for potions and your impatience for people who are not interested in it. That is a feeling I know, like I have it with Hermione and Quidditch, or with Neville at the beginning of the DA (Dumbledore's Army) meetings. He couldn't even muster the easiest spells when we first started."

Snape snorted but didn't say a word.

"But I do know that one has to have a lot of patience with potions since most of them require not only the proper handling while preparing but also a lot of time. So I thought that in fact you had to be a patient man."

~

Severus was glad about his practise in keeping an indifferent face. Otherwise he might have gaped at Harry. Damn that boy! He would not let himself get reeled in so easily. But he was surprised nevertheless and curious as well. The only sign he gave was the raise of an questioning eyebrow.

"I also realised what an amount of discipline and self-control you must have to have survived all that. And... you were able to comprehend everything that my father did and that I did – well you taught me everything I needed to succeed Voldemort despite the things that were done to you. You saw the bigger picture. I stopped hating you. Instead I came to trust and respect you."

Severus could hardly believe his ears. He looked at Harry who was still kneeling on the floor. He was either a real good actor or he had at last grown up for real as Severus had hoped. Either way, Severus was about to find out.

"Do you think that complimenting me will make me believe your story? Do you really think I am that stupid?" Severus watched closely as Harry shook his head.

"I've never thought of you being stupid, sir. But if you still don't believe me, why don't you look for yourself? You could use Legilimency. I won't stop you. You've always known if I try to hide something. You would notice."

That was true indeed. Severus had always been able to see when Harry was trying to hide something from him. And if he voluntarily offered this…

"Are you sure about this, Potter? Because if I find proof that you are trying to fool me…" He left the sentence unfinished but the threat was there all the same.

Instead of an answer Harry just looked right into Severus' eyes.

"Very well then." Severus returned the look and cast the spell: "Legilimens." He dived into Harry's mind. Pictures started to form in front of him and he could feel that they were not willingly pushed there for him to see. He couldn't feel the wall that Harry used to create to shield memories or emotions that he wouldn't want Severus to noticed. Severus saw and felt that Harry had not been lying to him. The only thing he felt was the shame of having looked into the Pensieve but also the gladness about knowing what happened. And he felt that Harry's knees were hurting from kneeling so long. Severus was just about to leave when he noticed some sort of excitement. Another picture came to the front and it involved him having Harry over his knees. Slowly he withdrew himself from the fantasy and Harry's mind.

Harry had blushed deeply but still hold Severus' gaze.

"I'm sorry about the last one, sir. I thought about hiding it but I knew you would have been suspicious."

Severus nodded. "You are right, I would have been." He believed Harry and came to a decision. "Get up and go to dinner."

Severus watched Harry stagger as he got up and reached out to help him get his balance. This made the young man blush even deeper. The whispered thank-you was hardly audible.

"Go," Severus repeated.

"Yes, sir." Harry turned around and stiffly walked towards the door.

"I believe you, Potter. Come to my office Monday night after dinner." Severus called after Harry.

Harry didn't turn back around but Severus saw the outstretched hand tremble in mid-air.

"Yes, sir."

tbc