Relinquished

She slammed the door of her room behind her and dropped her basket onto the floor. She went straight to the bathroom and splashed herself with cold water. She reached over with closed eyes to grab one of the ever present fluffy towels that Elani always changed every day, despite her protests.

Once her face was dry, she stared at her reflection in the mirror. She was so much browner than she was used to. She reached over and pinched her arm. No, she wasn’t dreaming. That meant that she really had just seen and spoken to Draco Malfoy on the beach.

Damn him, she thought. Why couldn’t he have the decency to stay dead and buried in her memory like the rest of the world that she had left behind her in England? She groaned and walked back to her room, where she flopped onto the bed. She felt panic welling up inside her. She couldn’t stay here now, could she? He would know it was her now. He’d recognised her, but she might have gotten away with her charade if she hadn’t completely lost it and pulled her wand on him. She pushed her face into her pillow and screamed.

All of the memories she’d been trying to bury started flooding back to her. She didn’t want to remember watching people she knew and cared about being killed around her. She didn’t want to remember taking lives, however justified it might have been. She didn’t want to remember the bittersweet victory, and the memorial service for all the fallen.

She rolled over, a stray tear falling from her eye. She rose and walked across to her window, pulled back the muslin curtain and looked out across the vista. The sky was blue today, with no trace of cloud. The water glistened in the sunshine, almost no movement at all. Such stillness. She felt herself calming and her breathing slowed. She couldn’t afford to run anyway. She hadn’t saved enough money working at the market, so she had no choice but to stay and face him if it came to that.

She wondered if he would let it rest. He was always very persistent in school. Once he latched onto something he could become repetitive to ad nauseam. She remembered with a slight smile of innocence long lost, the song he’d written in an effort to shake Ron during a Quidditch game. Could time have changed his tenacity? Judging by his manner on the beach when he’d chased her to find out her name, probably not. He was a Malfoy after all, used to getting what he wanted and if he wanted answers from her, he’d find a way to get them.

He had looked different though. In school he’d always seemed very aloof, ever the pure blood prince seeing his fellow students as minions rather than equals. Granted she hadn’t really spent that much time with him this afternoon, but she replayed their exchange in her head as she was wont to do, and could find no trace of the superiority complex he’d portrayed in their youth.

She crossed over to the mirror above her dresser and sat in front of it. She wondered how after all these years he’d known her from just a single look. She scolded herself. She’d recognised him as well. How could she mistake that white blond hair and those silver eyes? She closed her own eyes and focused on the face she’d seen today, comparing it with the last time she’d seen him. He was still pale, but the despair she remembered in him from their final year of school together had vanished. He no longer had those dark circles under his eyes and his whole demeanour was different; more relaxed. She supposed that the pressure of trying to live up to Voldemort’s request had been weighing heavily on him them.

She cast her mind back to before that fateful year. She thought about him during their third year, remembering his cocky arrogance and self assuredness as he’d approached Buckbeak in Care of Magical Creatures that day. She reflected on that sneer that he always wore. It had been missing from his face today and she realised that without it he was actually quite handsome. The thought made her eyes snap open. She looked at her reflection and was startled to see that she was blushing. She shook her head.

“Just get thoughts like that one right out of your head, Hermione,” she said to herself. Her brow furrowed.

“I’m sorry Miss?” a small voice said from the doorway. Hermione spun around. Elani, her landlady stood with an arm full of fresh towels.

“Oh! Elani, you gave me a fright,” she said, “I was talking to myself, I’m sorry”

Elani eyed her with caution before deciding that the English woman was safe. She bustled in and took a hold of the towels hanging from the rail.

“Really, Elani you don’t need to do that everyday,” Hermione said standing and taking a step towards her. The Greek woman shook her head and waved Hermione away.

“If you insist,” Hermione said raising her hands in defeat. She watched as Elani hurriedly replaced the towels and made her way from the room, casting another look of worry towards Hermione before she left.

When she was alone again, Hermione giggled a little at the impression she must be leaving on Elani. She arrived here four months ago, reluctant to give a name. Despite initially seeming wealthy by paying for her accommodation a year in advance, she had then taken a part time job in the marketplace. Now she was talking to herself and blushing at the thought that a boy from her past was now a very handsome man in her present.

She felt a twinge of guilt at her behaviour on the beach. It wasn’t his fault that he had stumbled into her self imposed exile. It also wasn’t his fault that seeing him there on her beach, on her island had caused her to over react and panic. He had been nice to her and she’d behaved like a child. She really owed him an apology, which she resolved to give to him if they bumped into each other again.

She made her way to the desk. She had fled England without letting her best friends know she was leaving, or where she was going. They would probably be worried about her.Being rudely confronted with her life off this island today made her realize she was being very selfish by shutting them out.

Harry and Ron,

I’m so sorry that I haven’t written before now. I think you’ll understand my reasons for just wanting to forget about everything. I am doing fine and I am safe. Please don’t try to find me, I’m just not ready yet.

I love you both,
Hermione

She re-read the letter a couple of times then sealed it. She chewed her lip for a second before realising she had no way of owling the letter to the boys. In fact, the only person anywhere nearby that might be able to help was the one person she should be avoiding.

She crossed to the mirror once again. What choice did she have? She really owed it to Harry and Ron, and she really did owe Malfoy an apology.

“Two birds,” she said grabbing the letter and dropping it into her basket. She opened her door and headed downstairs. She knocked on the kitchen door and opened it when Elani called out. The other lady was washing some dishes, probably from lunch.

“Elani, where else would foreigners stay here?” she asked picking up a cloth and beginning to dry a glass.

“There is hotel on other side of island, or Kurios Hektor has a villa that he leases to rich men. Up the top of the hill,” Elani grabbed the cloth and the glass from Hermione. Hermione knew that it was just the culture, but she couldn’t help but feel affronted by the motion. She nodded and let Elani know that she would be out again for a small time. Elani nodded and got back to her washing.